Finding Their Way Home
by Lori2279
Summary: Alexis and Kevin fell in love but outside forces got in their way. Will they ever find their way back to each other?
1. Prologue

First Castle story. This has been influenced by the massive amount of Rylexis fiction I have read. I own nothing. Reply?

2023-

Kate Beckett had seen a lot of reactions in all her years as a cop; a rookie getting sick at his first gory crime scene, family member dissolving into tears at the news of a loved one's demise, but as she walked down the hall of the New York hospital, she saw something she wasn't prepared for. Kevin Ryan was sitting on the floor of the hallway looking like his entire world had just collapsed.

She'd known that he and Espo were the ones who had discovered Alexis, and Kevin had ridden over with Alexis in the ambulance while Espo had stayed at the scene. Espo had been shaken up, but it was nothing like what Kate was seeing from Kevin at that moment.

Putting aside her husband's request that he catch the bastard that had hurt his daughter for a moment, she knelt down next to her friend and put her hand on his arm, "Kevin? Are you okay?"

The other detective lifted his head and looked at her. The look of pain reflected in his eyes echoed one she'd seen fleetingly about seven years ago.

Oddly enough it had been just after Rick had announced Alexis's elopement.

"Kevin? Talk to me," Kate said softly.

"I'm going to lose her," he said hoarsely.

"What?"

"Alexis. I finally got her back, and I'm gonna lose her all over again," he broke down in a painful sob.

Kate hugged him as he cried, his words repeating in her head.

Kevin was afraid he was going to lose Alexis…again.

Which begged the question: When had he had her to begin with?

2015 –

 _While truckin' down the road of life, although all hope seems gone,_

 _I just move on._

Kevin Ryan smiled in spite of the situation as he let himself into Martha's acting studio. It looked like Alexis was here listening to her grandma's records after all.

That meant she was alone. Good, because they needed to talk. It had been days of unreturned phone calls and ignored text messages. He was beginning to hate the message on Alexis's voice mail.

He followed the music to the auditorium and spotted the redhead he'd come to see lying on a settee staring at the ceiling.

He came down the stairs towards the stage as quietly as he could, but he must have made a noise.

"You shouldn't be here," Alexis said, sitting up.

"I wanted to see how you were. We didn't really get a chance to say anything at the wake or the funeral. You always seemed to be surrounded by people at the repast at the loft."

"I appreciate your concern, but I'm fine," Alexis insisted, "Please leave."

"Lex, what's going on?" Kevin climbed onto the stage and knelt down next to her. "This is more than Martha dying."

"I can't talk about it," she tried to wave him away.

"Hey," he took her hand. "Talk to me. I hate feeling like there's a wall between us."

"I got accepted to Tulane," she replied, "And I'm considering it."

"What?" Kevin stared at her. "Tulane? The one in New Orleans?"

"That's the one," she nodded, "I applied before this thing between the two of us started. I wasn't planning on going, but now I think it's for the best."

Kevin dropped her hand and settled back on his haunches, "Why?"

"We knew that this wasn't going to last forever," Alexis motioned between them. "I'm just saying it first."

"But," he began before she cut him off.

"You're married," she reminded him, "How can we have a future together? How could we even start?"

Yes, he was married but even before he and Alexis had started up, he'd been seriously considering becoming unmarried. He loved Sarah Grace, but he wasn't sure that he wanted to stay with her mother.

"I'll leave her," he began.

"I don't believe you," she shook her head.

"I mean it. I'll divorce her. I don't want to lose you," he said reaching out for her hand again only to have it pulled away.

"It's too late for that," she brushed tears off her cheeks. "It's over, Kevin. It should've never started. Everyone you know, everyone you love, would hate you for this; my dad, Javi, Beckett."

"I don't care about any of that," he insisted, "If you're going to Tulane, I'll go with you. I'll find a new position there."

"And leave your daughter, no," she shook her head. "Go home. Your family is waiting."

"I love you," he said.

Alexis stood up, "Love someone else."

Then she walked away.

Alexis got outside the theater and stepped to the curb with the bag she'd packed earlier that day. As she waited for a cab, she pulled out her phone and dialed.

 _"Hello?"_

"I did it. He's yours. Don't ever call me again," she hissed before hanging up. She hailed a cab and got in.

"Where to, Miss?"

"JFK," Alexis said after a moment. "I've got to get out of this town."

She didn't see Kevin running after her cab, nor the heartbroken look he had on his face.

She leaned back against the seat and placed a hand to her stomach. Tears filled her eyes.

"Stay with us, okay, Gram? Just for a little while."

-d-d-d-

Eight months later ~

Kevin looked up when he heard the elevator chime and saw Beckett and Castle stepping onto the floor. The brunette looked amused at her husband's ranting.

"Hey, what's going on?" Esposito asked from beside Kevin.

"Castle's freaking out," Beckett rolled her eyes.

"What about?"

"My daughter just got married," the writer exclaimed.

"What?" Kevin couldn't stop himself from speaking.

"That's where we were this weekend. Alexis and Chris eloped to Vegas on Saturday," Beckett explained.

"Wow. I didn't realize it was that serious," Esposito said.

"Castle's denial spreads to our friends," Kate motioned to her fellow detective. "I knew it was serious from the first time Alexis mentioned Christopher."

"She's never going to come home now," Castle grumbled. "She married an Alabama born Louisiana transplant Federal agent."

"And there lies the real problem," Kate pointed out. "He doesn't want his daughter married to a Navy cop."

"You married a cop, Castle," Esposito pointed out his infectious grin covering his face.

"Which I think is some kind of hypocrisy," Kate said. "Ryan, what do you think?"

They turned to see an empty space where the Irish cop had been standing.

"Where'd he go?" Kate looked around.

"I don't know," Esposito shook his head.

-d-d-d-

Kevin closed the door to the observation room and leaned against the wall. She was married. His girl was someone else's. He wanted to let out an angry yell. He wanted to slam his fists through a wall. He wanted to bang his head against the one way glass. Mostly he just wanted his heart to stop beating. Perhaps then it wouldn't hurt so much when he thought about the fact that the woman he loved had married someone else so soon after they'd separated.

He'd barely found a way to put one foot in front of the other after her abrupt exit eight months ago. All that pain that he'd forcibly buried was coming to the surface again, and he didn't think he could contain it a second time.

He thought about flying to New Orleans to confront her, but he suddenly had a thought. Did he really have any right to be mad at her for moving on with her life? He was the one that had ruined everything by stubbornly staying in a marriage that was no longer working.

He thought about calling a divorce attorney, but he didn't want to put his daughter through what would promise to be a painful divorce. The brief separation he'd had with his wife had already scarred their daughter. He could only imagine what a divorce could do.

His last thought was that he had to put Alexis out of his mind. He had to find a way to let her go. He pulled out his phone and deleted every trace of her that he had left. He said a private goodbye and then returned to his colleagues. He did his best to seem happy by their news, but inside he was dying.


	2. Chapter 1

So I forgot to thank my beta and co-writer last time. Goodform2011, you rock.

Eight Years Later -

Kevin put a file down on Beckett's desk and glanced at the pictures that ran across it. There was her and Castle in their wedding finery with the ocean in the background and Martha and Jim flanking the couple, a Christmas shot of Jo, Jamie, and Ian in front of the tree, their toothy grins nice and wide, and then there was a shot of Alexis and Christopher in face paint and beads.

So disgusted by the thought that she was happy with someone else, he almost turned away until he saw another picture, one with Alexis and a young boy.

He picked it up without another thought and looked at the boy sitting on her lap. He was red haired like Alexis, Martha, and Alexis's mother, Meredith, but while his eyes were blue, a blue that didn't match Castle. The color matched his own.

"Snooping Ryan?" Kate asked as she walked up.

"Sorry," Kevin put down the picture quickly. "Is that Alexis and Chris's son?"

"Yes, that's Hunter. I can't believe he'll be eight next month," Kate smiled. "Castle wants to do a huge party for him. Alexis and I are going to have to use sedatives to rein him in."

"Next month," Kevin in surprise, "He was born before Alexis and Chris got married?"

"Yeah," Kate nodded.

Kevin began to mentally do the math and suddenly was as white as a ghost.

"You okay, Ryan?" Kate caught his distress.

"Yeah, I'm good," Kevin nodded. "I, uh, I just have to go check on something."

"Kevin, are you sure you're alright?" she caught his hand.

"I'm fine, Beckett," Kevin smiled as best he could.

"If you're not feeling well, go home before you get the rest of us sick," Beckett commanded him, "That flu that's been going around is a nasty bugger."

"Good idea. I am feeling a little nauseous," Kevin nodded before he headed for the elevator. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Feel better, Ryan," Kate called after him.

"Thanks," he waved over his shoulder before stepping into the elevator. He waited until the doors were shut before collapsing against the wall and hanging onto the railings. He was having a hard time breathing.

For the few moments that he was alone in the elevator he was in complete agony. He'd fathered a son and had missed eight years with both him and his mother.

Had Alexis known the night she'd walked away? Why hadn't she told him?

The elevators chimed the arrival of the first floor. He did the best he could to regain his usual demeanor, but he knew it was best to avoid speaking with anyone. He kept his head down and made his way outside.

Just as he reached the street, his phone chimed. It was Javier.

"Hey, I'm on my way home. Beckett thinks I'm getting the flu."

 _"Get to a TV."_

Kevin went back inside and stopped in front of a television in the precinct. The news station screamed the headline that a federal agent in New Orleans had just been killed in an explosion.

"Oh my God," Kevin breathed. He turned around and ran back to the elevator.

"You're supposed to be going home with the flu," Javier greeted Kevin when he returned to the floor.

"I'm fine. Beckett overreacted. Where is she?"

"On the phone," Javier pointed to the break room. "She and Castle are trying to get hold of Alexis."

"Lex isn't considered a federal agent, is she?" Kevin was numb as he spoke the words.

"No, but her husband is," Javier reminded him. Beckett's desk phone started to ring, and he picked it up, "Detective Beckett's phone."

 _"Javi,"_ a voice quivered. It was so small and quiet that Javier could barely hear it. _"Is my dad there?"_

"Alexis? Is that you?"

 _"Javi, I really need to talk to my dad. Is he there?"_

"Are you alright?" Javier pressed as he motioned Castle over, "We just saw the news."

Alexis started to sob.

"Alexis, are you alright?" Rick snatched the phone out of Javier's hands.

 _"Daddy, he's gone,"_ Alexis broke out in painful sobs.

"Oh God," Rick sat in Kate's seat. "Sweetie, I am so sorry."

"Oh no," Kate murmured.

Esposito put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

Rick tried to be as gentle as he could in getting information out of her about what had happened, but Alexis was too distraught to give any information.

"Rick, I'm calling the airline," Kate spoke with tears in her eyes, "We'll be on the next flight out."

"I'll call your dad," Javier added, "See if he can stay with the kiddos."

"Thank you," Kate mouthed.

Kevin stood motionless...helpless.

"Detective Ryan, what's happening?" Captain Gates asked him.

"I...ah...I think Alexis's husband was the federal agent that died in the explosion in New Orleans," Kevin stammered out.

"Oh God," Gates sighed. "When Beckett gets off the phone, let her know I called personnel to clear her days off."

Kevin nodded. Trying to find something to do, anything to feel useful, he picked up the phone to see if he could find out anything he could about what happened in New Orleans.

=d=d=d=d=

Alexis sat on the window seat of her bedroom staring out at the sky. She was wearing a black dress and her hair was twisted back, the ends curled like ribbons. She smiled a little. Chris loved it when she wore it up.

 _Easy access, Darling._

She was disrupted from her thoughts by a soft knock at her door.

"Alexis, sweetheart, it's time," Castle spoke softly.

Alexis nodded, "The boys?"

"Downstairs already," Castle nodded. "Maggie's mad that she has to stay with Laurel."

"She's too young, Daddy."

"I know," he replied, "But she's going to want to say goodbye to her father too."

"I'll take her another day," Alexis said. "Is King downstairs?"

"No," Castle shook his head.

"Damn him," Alexis shook her head.

"Honey," Castle tried to calm her down.

"No. Don't defend him. Don't you dare."

"It wasn't his fault," Castle tried to reason with her.

"I know it wasn't his fault. I don't blame him, but he should be here."

"And you're cursing him for being late?" he inquired.

"He's not coming, Dad. I know him. He's off at some random bar, drunk off his ass."

"He just lost an agent."

"And I lost a husband. My children lost their father," Alexis snapped, "He should be honoring his agent, not drinking away his pain."

"Have you given anymore thought to what we discussed last night?"

"Not now, Dad," Alexis said as she left her room and started down the hall.

"Daughters. That's why Lear went mad," Castle nodded before he followed Alexis.

Alexis looked at her watch. "We'd better get going…I can't believe I'm burying my husband."

"Is it wrong to say you look lovely?" Castle asked.

"Yes," she nodded, "But thank you."

Kate looked up from the photo she was holding as Alexis and Rick came down the stairs, "Hey."

"Everyone ready to go?" Alexis slipped into her jacket.

"Yeah," Kate nodded.

"Boys?" Alexis called. "Come on."

"Mommy," Maggie moaned as she ran towards her mother with her arms outstretched.

"Hey Maggie Mae," Alexis scooped up her little girl and tried to put on a brave face. "You gonna be good for Laurel?"

Maggie's head came to rest against her mother's shoulder, "I miss Daddy."

"I know you do, Peanut," Alexis's eyes filled with tears, "I do too."

"Will I never see him…ever, ever again?"

"Boys, let's get your coats on," Kate ushered Hunter and Cade towards the closet as Alexis took Maggie into the kitchen to talk to her.

"Sweetie, remember what we talked about yesterday," Alexis sat Maggie on the counter and brushed her hair behind her ears, "Daddy is in heaven now. We will see him one day, but not for a long, long time."

Maggie's lip trembled as she started to cry again and Alexis gathered her up in her arms.

Castle stood in the doorway and watched, his heart breaking for his daughter and granddaughter.

-d-d-d-

Kevin looked around him and then started to type information into the computer.

"What are you working on, Ryan?" Javier ambled up beside him.

"Nothing important," Kevin cleared the screen. "Have you talked to Beckett?"

"Yeah," Javier nodded, "Funeral was flooded with law enforcement from across the country. Sounds like Alexis's husband got a proper send off."

"How is she?"

"Holding up as well as she can," Javier told him. "I feel bad for her."

"Yeah, of course. Her husband just died."

"You don't know? Ry, she was standing across the street when it happened."

"What?" Kevin's heart stuttered.

"Yeah. She was helping out EMS when the building blew."

"Wow, that's rough," Kevin ran his hands through his hair, "Was she injured in the blast?"

"Beckett said she got scratched up but nothing serious," Javier sat down and leaned back in his chair. "Beckett said Castle's trying to talk Alexis into moving back here."

"Think that's going to happen?"

"I don't know," Javier shook his head. "Lanie and I were going down there next month to visit. Guess that's not happening now."

"I've always thought about going myself," Kevin admitted.

"I can't see you at Mardi Gras," Javier laughed.

"Good point," Kevin snorted.

"I'll be back," Javier stood up again when his phone buzzed.

Kevin nodded and then turned back to his computer. He typed in Alexis's name and three birth certificates popped up. He chose Hunter's and looked at the date before he closed his eyes and leaned back. The dates fit. Alexis had been pregnant when she left New York. Hunter was his son.

"Dammit Alexis," he hissed.


	3. Chapter 2

Thanks for all the great replies last time. Keep it up. :)

* * *

"Morning," Castle said to Alexis when she entered the kitchen. "Kate just took the boys to the park."

"Is Maggie still sleeping?" Alexis went straight for the coffee.

"Yeah," Castle nodded. "Speaking of, how'd you sleep?"

"Okay, I guess."

"Lex, you don't need to put on a brave face for me," Castle told her, "I'm here for you for whatever you need."

"Honestly? I keep thinking I'm going to turn over and Chris will be there," Alexis admitted.

"That's perfectly normal," Rick told her.

"I miss him so much," Alexis began to tear up.

"I know you do," Rick hugged her.

"How'd you do it, Dad?" Alexis sat on a stool at the counter. "After things fell apart with Mom and then Gina, how did you get used to sleeping alone?"

"You just do," he shrugged, "There's no magic recipe."

"God, I can feel him everywhere," Alexis wrapped her arms around herself, "How do I pick up and go on when I can smell him on the sheets?"

"I might have a solution to that," Rick admitted.

"Wash the sheets?" Alexis posed sarcastically.

"It's a start," Rick nodded, "But I was thinking something a bit more thorough."

"This is about New York again," she groaned, "Do you really want to do this now?"

"I talked to Lanie last night. Perlmutter's retiring," Castle started. "She knows your work, and she talked to the head of the M.E.'s office. He's seen your transcripts and your work from the Jefferson Parish office. Not to mention Loretta sings your praises."

"You talked to Loretta? Dad, really?"

"I simply wanted you to have options," Castle defended his actions, "Only you know what is best for you and your children, but what's keeping you in New Orleans?

"I have a job," Alexis reminded him. "The kids are in school."

"And when the year ends," Castle prodded her, "Chris's family is in Alabama. Yours is in New York. Are you going to be able to juggle three children and a full time job all on your own? The better question, why should you juggle three children and a full time job, when you have so many people in New York that would love to help out?"

"Dad, I can't go back," Alexis shook her head, "There's too many bad memories there. There are the memories of Gram and K...Hunter's father. I can't risk running into him."

"Sweetheart, it's been eight years. What are the odds that he's still in New York?"

 _Better than you know,_ Alexis thought to herself.

"Dad, it's just," Alexis shook her head and took in her surroundings. This was her home, her home with Chris and their children. How could she even think about leaving?

Castle suddenly understood, "It doesn't matter where you are, he's going to be with you."

"How would the children adjust to New York? New Orleans is all they've ever known."

"It'll just be a different kind of crazy than they're used to."

"I do miss New York," Alexis conceded, "And the summers here can be unbearable with all the heat and humidity."

"So, you'll think about it?"

"I'll think about it," Alexis nodded, "But don't get your hopes up."

"Too late," Castle smiled.

-d-d-d-

 _"Esposito,"_ Javier answered.

"Hey Espo," Kate said as she sat in Alexis's living room.

 _"Hey, Beckett, how's New Orleans?"_ Javier asked.

"Hot," Kate muttered. "Don't these people know it's almost winter?"

 _"Send some of that heat our way,"_ Javier requested, _"It's like the Arctic up here."_

Kate smiled a little, "How's it going up there? Am I missing anything?"

 _"Just the stick up Ryan's ass,"_ Javier said quietly.

"What's going on with him?" Kate inquired.

 _"Your guess is as good as mine. I tried asking. He just glared at me."_

"We're going to be here for a little longer than expected. You and Ryan going to be able to handle things until we get back?"

 _"Yeah, I think we'll be alright. How's Alexis?"_

"She's doing as well as expected," Kate replied, "Rick thinks she's going to move back to New York after the school term. He's already contacted a realtor to find her an apartment near ours."

 _"That's good,"_ Javier nodded. _"Is she gonna take the job in the ME's office?"_

"She is if Castle has anything to say about it," Kate sighed.

 _"Tell her we're…well I'm glad she's coming back. It would take a miracle for Ryan to be glad about anything right now."_

"Do me a favor and take whatever stick is up Ryan's butt out before I get back...oh and if you could look in on my dad and the kids."

 _"No problem. I'll go over there after work with pizza. Maybe I'll stay the night and let your dad go home."_

"Just be careful, okay? Remember the last time you baby-sat for the kids? You were tied to a chair by the time Castle and I got home."

 _"Give me some credit,"_ Javier scoffed, _"I wouldn't let those rugrats tie me up a second time."_

"I'll believe it when I don't see it."

 _"Take care, Beckett, and don't worry about anything up this way. We got you covered until you get back."_

"Thanks, Javi. Bye," Kate said before they hung up.

-d-d-d-

Javier hung up his phone and caught sight of his partner walking towards him.

"What's up?" Kevin glanced at his partner, "We catch a case?"

"No. That was Beckett," Esposito said.

Kevin nodded as he turned away from Javier, "How's it going down there?"

"She and Castle are going to be down there for a bit longer," Espo relayed. "Castle is trying to talk Alexis to return to New York and take the opening M.E. job."

"Perlmutter's really doing it, huh?" Kevin smirked. "I thought he'd die in autopsy."

"Guess not," Javi tapped at his desk with his pen, "Do you think Lex will come back?"

"I don't know," Kevin shrugged. "She's been gone a long time."

"Remember how freaked Castle was when she got married?" Javier grinned.

"He wasn't the only one," Kevin muttered under his breath.

"What?" Javier frowned.

"Just thinking out loud. Nothing important," Kevin said. "Beckett mention how the kids are dealing?"

"Not really," Javi responded, "But they're probably dealing with it about as well as any kid would with losing their father so young."

"Yeah," Kevin looked to Beckett's desk, focusing on the frame he knew held the picture of Alexis and Hunter, the boy with his blue eyes.

"Did Castle ever mention who Hunter's father is?" Javi followed Kevin's gaze, "I mean it doesn't take a genius to figure out that it had to be someone here in New York. She didn't meet Chris until later."

"Not to me," Kevin shook his head and avoided Javier's gaze. He'd never told his partner about his relationship with Alexis.

"Heaven help the man if Castle ever gets his hands on him," Javier snorted in amusement.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "I don't think there's a more overprotective father than Rick Castle."

"What's up with you?" Javier asked, "You're in a mood. Even Lanie's PMS moods don't swing this violently."

"Nothing," Kevin shook his head. "Speaking of Lanie, isn't she expecting you for dinner?"

"Are you keeping things from me?" Javier studied his partner's nervous posture.

"Like what?" Kevin said looking at him.

"You tell me," Javier eyed him.

"I'm fine," Kevin said. "I'm gonna go. I've got an appointment."

"An appointment for what?" Javier followed Kevin to the elevator.

"Dentist," Kevin said. "And I'm late. So are you."

"Don't think this is over, Ryan," Javier continued to stare Kevin down when they climbed into the elevator.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"For someone who used to work undercover, you're a bad liar."

"For someone that used to be Special Forces, you don't know what the hell you're talking about," Ryan replied.

"Fine. We both know that sooner or later, you're going to tell me what's going on."

"Do we?"

"Yep, because you can't keep things to yourself. It's a byproduct of having so many sisters. You can't help it."

"You're crazy."

"Fine, keep playing it cool," Javi shrugged, "You'll cave eventually."

"Believe whatever you want," Kevin was relieved with the elevator opened to the ground floor, and he was able to escape his partner's interrogation.

Truth was, he wanted someone that he could talk to about his problem, and Javier was the natural choice. He just didn't know if he could trust him to keep the knowledge to himself considering how closely he worked with both Castle and Beckett.

"See you tomorrow," Javier said as they parted ways at the street.

"Night, Bro," Kevin waved as he walked away.

Kevin took his cell phone out and mapped the directions he needed. The lawyer he was about to see was about two blocks away.

It was time to end the farce that was his marriage.

"I can stay," Castle said as he hugged his daughter.

"Kate has work and if you don't go home and start writing, Gina's going to come here. I cannot deal with one of your fights right now," Alexis smiled.

"If you or the children need anything, I can be on the first flight out," Castle hugged her again before hugging his grandchildren, "Now you three be good for Mommy."

Hunter looked at his grandpa, "We will, Grandpa."

Kate hugged Alexis, "Call if you need to talk, okay? I know it's not the same, but I think I can understand better than your dad."

"Thanks, Kate," Alexis hugged her tight, "Hug my siblings for me."

"You can hug them for yourself if you move back to New York," Castle chimed in. He hadn't missed an opportunity to prod her into returning to New York.

"Dad, if you keep bugging me about moving back to New York, the kids and I are moving to Hawaii," Alexis told him.

"Deal," Kate's eyes went wide with intrigue, "We'll join you."

"I can apply to work for NCIS Pearl Harbor," Alexis giggled.

"And I can work with McGarrett and Williams," Kate

smiled.

"No," Castle shut down the thought at the mention of Steve McGarrett. He couldn't take another round of that ruggedly good looking Hawaii cop that his wife and daughter had drooled over.

"Oh Dad, McGarrett does not go for married women, and his wife would kill him if he tried."

"No," Castle repeated himself.

"You're no fun," Kate frowned.

"I disagree. I think I'm a lot of fun," Castle smirked.

"I think you're fun, Grandpa," Maggie raised her arms to him so she could have another hug.

"Thank you, Miss Maggie," Castle scooped her up. "Do you know that your great grandma would love that we call you Miss Maggie?"

"How come?"

"Because she was an actress, and one of her favorite roles was playing Maggie in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof," Castle smiled.

"I love that picture of her," Alexis smiled.

"Me too," Kate agreed.

Maggie hugged her grandfather tight.

Hunter and Cade stood close to Alexis while Maggie was transferred to Kate to hug her goodbye.

"Give Grandpa his last hugs," Alexis instructed her sons, "We'd better let them get on the plane."

Hunter and Cade hugged Castle tightly as they whispered goodbye while Kate gave Maggie to Alexis.

"No matter what time it is," Kate whispered in Alexis's ear. "Just pick up the phone."

"I will, I promise," she replied.

"I love you, Bud," Kate smiled.

"Love you too," Alexis hugged Kate once more. "Call me when you land in New York."

"We will," Kate promised. "Ready, Castle?"

"One more hug," Castle replied as he hugged his oldest child and then his grandchildren in turn.

"Go," Alexis laughed as she shoved him towards the security line.

They watched them enter the airport and then Alexis herded the kids to the car to take them home.

=d=d=d=d=

"God, it is freezing out," Kate said as she got off the elevator. "Castle, bug Alexis about moving up here some more. Maybe she'll make good on her Hawaii threat. Then we can all move."

Rick laughed while he pulled out his phone to text Alexis that they'd arrived safe and sound in New York.

"Daddy!" Jo ran straight for her father. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Jo," Rick scooped her up. "Were you good for Grandpa?"

"Yep," she nodded her head vigorously.

"I agree," Jim entered the room. "She even untied Esposito after her brothers played cowboys and Indians."

"I knew it," Kate smirked. "Jamie? Ian? Come give us hugs."

The boys came running in to greet their parents.

"What did you bring us?" Jo asked her mother as she leapt from one parent to the other.

"We brought beads, so we can make Mardi Gras necklaces," Castle smiled. "And beignet mix for breakfast. Also, some masks."

"Gimme, gimme, gimme," Jo responded eagerly. It was a few moments before it occurred to her to add a sugary sweet, "Please."

"Come on," Rick took Jo back from Kate and put her over his shoulder. "Let's start with the beads."

"I should call the station," Kate picked up her cell phone.

 _"Ryan,"_ Kevin answered.

"Hey," Kate said.

 _"Hey, Beckett,"_ Kevin greeted her, _"How was the flight?"_

"Very uneventful," Kate commented as she started going through the mail. "How's work? You guys doing okay?"

 _"We caught a couple of cases, but nothing too exciting,"_ Kevin responded, _"They're on the D.A.'s desk ready for them to wrap up."_

"So, you don't need me right now?"

 _"You're safe until tomorrow,"_ Kevin assured her.

"If anything changes, I'm only a call away," Kate replied.

 _"Hey, Beckett,"_ Kevin caught her before she hung up, _"How's Alexis doing?"_

"She's putting up a pretty good front," Kate made sure Rick wasn't listening. "But between us, I didn't want to leave her anymore than Castle did."

 _"Is she going to be okay?"_ Kevin's voice caught in his throat.

"She's going to need some time," Kate replied, "She's still in shock, I think."

 _"Yeah, it's gotta be tough to lose someone the way she did,"_ Kevin commented, trying not to think about how much pain Alexis must be in. _"I can't even imagine what she's going through."_

"Ryan, why don't you call her? You guys were friends."

 _"She doesn't want to hear from me,"_ Kevin shook off the suggestion.

"Can't hurt to call," Kate responded, "I can give you her number. It changed after she left New York. I don't think she'd mind if you had it."

Kevin closed his eyes remembering the first time he'd called Alexis after she'd left only to get the no longer in service message.

"Kevin? Hey, you still there?"

 _"Yeah, still here,"_ Kevin responded quickly.

"I'll text you the number," Kate offered.

 _"Yeah, okay,"_ Kevin said. Who said he had to use it?

"I'll be in the office first thing in the morning," Kate responded, "Night, Ryan."

 _"Night, Beckett. See you tomorrow."_

-d-d-d-

After hanging up the phone, Kevin made sure he was alone before he opened the bottom drawer of his desk and put his hand straight down until he felt the frame at the bottom. He carefully pulled it out and looked at the picture he'd hidden away.

It was a picture of him and Alexis at a carnival. They'd gone to one of those instant photo booths and took two sets of pictures, one for him and one for her. He often wondered what had happened to her set.

He knew he couldn't keep the pictures at home, so he'd buried them in his desk, only digging them out during the worst days.

She looked so beautiful. He could remember that day with perfect clarity. They'd eaten bad food and ridden every ride they could. Then they'd gone back to the loft and made love.

He could still hear the sounds she made in those passionate moments. They'd haunted his dreams since she left and recently his waking moments. He kept spinning around the idea that she might return to New York.

He knew that if she didn't, he was going to her. They were going to work this out. They were going to do what they should've done eight years ago.

He tucked back the picture and pulled out the papers he'd been given at his lawyer's office and began to read through them. He wasn't asking for much. He wanted joint custody of their daughter. He was giving Jenny their apartment and most of their possessions. He wanted to make the separation as painless as possible for all involved.

He had talked to his mother the night before and though, as a Catholic, she wasn't thrilled with the prospect of divorce, she knew that something had been missing from her son's marriage for a long time. She wasn't about to make him stay with someone just because the church said divorce was a sin.

Kevin glanced at the clock. Regrettably it was time to return home. He put the papers in his drawer and locked it. He'd finish reading through them tomorrow if they didn't catch a case.

Picking up his jacket, he headed for the elevator.

"Ryan, have you heard from Beckett?" Gates stopped him.

"Yes, Sir," Kevin nodded, "She just called. Her and Castle are home. She'll be in first thing in the morning."

"And how is her stepdaughter?"

"Doing as well as expected, I guess," Kevin rubbed at the back of his neck.

"Right. Well, good night," Gates said. "Careful going home. It's starting to ice up out there."

"Thanks for the warning," Kevin replied, "You too."

Gates gave him a nod as she went back into her office, and Kevin entered the elevator. He pressed the button for the lobby and leaned back against the wall.

His phone alerted him to a new message. It was Kate giving him Alexis's number. His finger twitched to call it. He fought the impulse with the knowledge that both he and Alexis were too raw right now for a civil conversation.

He'd been so angry since he'd found out about his son. How could Alexis withhold something so important from him?

And yet some part of him wouldn't shut up about how scared she had to have been when she found out. She'd been twenty-two and sleeping with a married man who was also one of her dad's best friends. Castle would've happily shot him, and Beckett would've helped her husband hide the body.

Leaving for New Orleans couldn't have been easy for her. He should have followed his heart. He should have gone after her. He kicked himself nearly every day for not doing so. Since he'd found out about his son, he'd begun kicking himself a bit harder.

Now...now, Alexis was a widow with three children under the age of ten. She'd seen the building her husband had been in explode. If she'd been closer she might have died herself.

He wanted to hop on a plane and just wrap her in his arms, but he wondered how she'd react. Would she fall into his arms, slap him across the face, or kick him in the family jewels?

As he crossed the precinct lobby, putting his gloves on, readying himself for the biting cold of the winter night, he could only hope that when they did come face to face again, that Alexis would at least smile at him.


	4. Chapter 3

I know you guys are out there. Do I have to beg? Please please give me some replies.

=d=d=d=

Alexis flew through the doors of the morgue and threw her bag across the room.

Sebastian eyed the M.E. curiously. "Alexis?"

"He's gonna get someone killed."

"Who, King?"

"Yes," she pulled on her lab coat, "He doesn't give a damn about anyone's safety. He nearly got Meredith killed today."

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, thank God," Alexis shook her head.

"That's good, right?"

"Sebastian-"

King burst through the doors with rage, "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Me?"

"Yeah, you," King stepped towards her with the intent of giving her a good scolding.

"I guess I have a problem with you getting into a needless shoot out that almost gets a close friend of mine killed," Alexis refused to back down, "I am not going to stand in another cemetery and wonder where you are while I watch Meredith's parents bury another daughter."

"Dr. LaSalle," Loretta Wade cautioned the younger woman upon exiting her office after overhearing the commotion.

"No, don't defend him Dr. Wade," Alexis interrupted her boss, "His recklessness is going to get someone killed. I'm not going to just sit back and watch it happen."

"Take a deep breath, both of you," Loretta instructed them before King could go on another attack, "You're both still reeling. You don't want to say something you'll regret."

"Sebastian, how much vacation time do I have accrued?"

"Uh," Sebastian slid across the room in his air towards the computer and pressed some buttons. "Two and a half months."

"Good. Put it in for me starting tomorrow. Dr. Wade, this is my notice. I quit."

"Alexis," Dr. Wade pulled her aside, "Now isn't the time to be making this decision. I went against my instincts in letting you return so quickly after everything. It's only been a week."

"You know that I couldn't just stay in the house and stare at the walls," Alexis spoke quietly.

"Take some time," Doctor Wade advised her, "This isn't the time to end a promising career."

"This is the perfect time," Alexis peeled off her lab coat and returned it to its hook, "I can be in New York for Christmas."

"Alexis," Dr. Wade approached her.

Alexis turned to King, "My kids adore you. You delivered my first son. You're his godfather. Chris looked at you like a father. You got him through the darkest time of his life. Because of all of that, I've kept my mouth shut every time you've disappointed my kids since their father died, but I am not going to stay here and watch you get yourself or someone else killed. If you want to say goodbye to the kids, we're leaving on the twentieth."

"Alexis," Dr. Wade called out to her a second time just as Alexis was leaving Autopsy.

"You taught me a lot," Alexis turned to the older woman. "I'm grateful, but I can't stay here."

"If you change your mind in a week or a month or six months," Dr. Wade offered, "We will hold your place for you."

Alexis hugged her and then Sebastian, "Cade's gonna miss you the most, you know that, right?"

"Take care, Lex," Sebastian nodded, "If you need anything..."

"I'll be alright," she smiled.

Alexis walked out of the morgue and took out her phone. She dialed Lanie.

" _Hello?"_

"Is the job my father told me about still available?"

" _Alexis?"_ Lanie was taken aback by the familiar voice, _"Is that you?"_

"Yes, sorry. Hi, Lanie. How are you?"

" _I'm better now,"_ Lanie's voice smiled through their connection, _"How are you holding up?"_

"I've been better," she admitted, "I...ah...I just quit my job."

" _Oh,"_ Lanie's tone was surprised. _"I see."_

Alexis narrowed her eyes at Lanie's tone and the obvious pause. Then she laughed, "Hi, Dad. Hi, Kate. You guys at a scene or the morgue?"

" _Scene…Alexis, as much as we'd love you to come home, are you sure you should be making this decision so quickly?"_ her father spoke up.

"Wasn't it just last week where you were nearly begging me to move back?" Alexis frowned in disappointment, "Or did I hallucinate?"

" _Ignore him, Bud,"_ Kate said. _"What can we do?"_

"Well, Lanie can answer my question. Is the job still available?"

" _Job's yours if you want it,"_ Lanie replied, _"We have a bit of time until Perlmutter retires, so you don't need to start right away. I'm sure you'll have plenty to do in the interim."_

"I plan to be back in the city by Christmas. I'm off to a realtor right now to put the house on the market."

" _Alexis, are you sure this is what you want?"_ Castle chimed in.

"Yes," Alexis felt herself choke up, "I need to do this, Daddy."

" _I'll fly down next week to help you pack,"_ Castle said. _"We'll drive back."_

"Thank you," Alexis smiled to herself, "We'll work out the details a bit later."

" _Okay. See you soon,"_ Castle said. _"Bye, Sweetheart."_

"Bye. Bye, Lanie. Bye, Kate," she said.

" _Bye,"_ the girls chorused.

-d-d-d-

"She's coming home," Castle gave the ladies a wide grin.

"We heard," Kate said dryly.

"Who's coming home?" Ryan asked as he walked over.

"Alexis," Lanie chimed in, "She apparently just quit her job."

Ryan nearly hyperventilated as he processed the news.

"You okay?" Kate stared at him.

"Yeah," Kevin reached out to steady himself, "Must be coming down with something."

"You're having a weird winter, Ryan," Kate frowned. This was the second time he'd come down with an illness in a month. "Anyways, she'll be home for Christmas. We should have some people over on Christmas Eve."

"Wonderful idea," Castle grinned, "Christmas Eve at our place. Everyone is invited. Just bring yourselves, your significant others, and your kids. Kate and I will handle the rest."

"Um, Castle, only Kevin has kids or rather a kid," Beckett corrected him with a chuckle. "The rest are ours."

"You know what I mean," Castle gave his wife a look.

Kate nodded, "I just think it'll be better for people to be around. Make it a little less empty for Alexis."

"I think Jenny has already made plans for our Christmas Eve," Kevin spoke up, barely able to hear his own voice as his heart was hammering in his ears.

"Let us know when you find out for sure. I'd love for you to meet my grandkids," Castle smiled.

"Yeah, I'll let you know," he nodded.

"Lanie?" Kate raised an eyebrow, "You and Javi have plans?"

"I don't know about Javi, but I'm there," the woman smiled. "I can't wait to see my girl, Alexis, again, and meet hers kids, especially Maggie. That girl is her mom's mini me."

"Yeah, her mother's looks with Martha's attitude," Kate smirked.

"She's a hoot," Castle beamed with grandfatherly pride.

"What are the boys like?" Kevin asked quietly.

"Cade is a rough and tumble kid kinda like his dad," Kate replied, "He loves to get dirty and run about. Hunter is a bit more reserved, quiet even, but he's super smart."

"Sounds like some good kids," Kevin smiled a little.

"They're great kids," Kate amended, "You'll see for yourself soon."

"Can't wait," Kevin nodded before he went to talk to the CSU tech.

-d-d-d

Alexis ran her hand over a pile of Christopher's shirts that rested in a box. The material was soft and worn. She pulled one out and slid into it. She thought it would be a good idea to donate his clothes to charity, but she couldn't bring herself to follow through.

 _You always look better in my shirts than I do._

"Everything okay in here, Sweetheart?" Castle walked into her bedroom to check on her.

"Yeah, just packing," she wiped her eyes.

"Is that Chris's shirt?" Castle noted her sudden wardrobe change.

"Yeah," Alexis brought the cuffs to her nose to inhale her husband's scent, "I'm going to keep a couple of his shirts and sweatshirts. The kids might want them when they're older."

"Do you mind if I take this hat?" Rick reached for the NCIS hat in a different pile.

"Go ahead," Alexis smiled. "He always said you would've made a hell of an agent."

Castle smiled, "Think Hunter will follow in his footsteps?"

"Oh yeah," Alexis nodded, "He's already talking about it. He couldn't wait until he was old enough for Chris to take him to the shooting range…I guess I'll need to find someone else to take him."

"I'm sure Beckett would jump at the chance, and she's a very patient teacher."

"Chris thought Kate was the coolest mother-in-law ever," Alexis smiled. "Even when she pulled the rifle on him before she knew who he was when you first visited me."

"That's my wife," he beamed with pride.

"You got lucky, Dad," Alexis smiled. "You found her at just the right time."

"Don't I know it," he found a photo album on Alexis's dresser. He thumbed through it to find it was her wedding album. "Where did you want this?"

"Get it out of my sight," Alexis said shaking her head upon realizing what he was looking at.

"Alexis, but it's your…" he began.

"I know what it is," she felt herself choking up, "I just can't see it right now."

"Alright, Sweetheart," Castle agreed. "What did you want to do for dinner?"

"Tacos sound good," she replied.

"Alright," Castle smiled. "I'll go get some."

"See if the boys want to go with you."

Maggie came running into her mother's bedroom and wrapped her arms around her neck, "I can't find Mr. Beary."

"He's already packed, Miss Maggie," Alexis tapped at her daughter's nose.

"Oh," Maggie frowned. "Mama, when are we leaving?"

"Day after tomorrow," Alexis said. "Two more sleeps."

"Do you need Mr. Beary right now?" Rick asked his granddaughter.

"He gets scared in the dark," Maggie nodded her head vigorously.

"Well, we can't have that," Rick offered her his hand, "How about we rescue Mr. Beary, and then I'll take the boys to get dinner? We're getting tacos."

"Yummy!" Maggie danced happily as she took her grandpa's hand.

Alexis gave her father a grateful smile as she continued packing.

She walked into the closet and found the last of the boxes in the corner. She opened it to see what was in it and closed her eyes when she realized why it was shoved into the corner. She hadn't opened this box since she left New York. It was full of memories of her relationship with Kevin.

She quickly put the lid back on and added it to the boxes to be loaded into the truck. She'd been avoiding the thoughts of him as she prepared to return to New York. It was best to keep him out of her mind. She knew she'd inevitably run into him. She didn't know how she would react, but she didn't want to spend time worrying about it just yet.

She walked back into her room and picked up a picture of Hunter. Her son's blue eyes stared back at her and for just a second Kevin's face flashed in her mind's eye.

"Give me strength to get through this, Chris," Alexis looked towards the heavens.

 _I'm always with you, Darling._

-d-d-d-

Kevin stared out the car window at the snow flurries as Javier drove them towards the station.

"You're quiet, Partner," Javi made note, "Everything okay?"

"Just thinking," Kevin said. "You going to Castle's for Christmas Eve?"

"Was planning on it," Javi nodded, "You?"

"Jenny wants us to go to her folks'," Kevin said. "We're negotiating."

"You gotta come," Javi responded, "Lessen the blow for when Lanie gets disappointed by the gift I give her."

"You didn't get her a frying pan again, did you?"

"Give me some credit," Javier snorted, "I'm not going to give her something she can turn into a weapon and hit me with later."

"It was funny watching you explain the bruise to Gates," Kevin smirked.

"Come on, Partner," Javi pleaded with him, "Don't make me beg."

"I'll see if Jenny would mind if I went to Castle's instead of her folks'," Kevin relented.

"If she says no, give her my number. I'll convince her."

"The last time I let you talk to her, she made me sleep on the couch," he reminded him.

"At least it's a comfortable couch."

"Not after a week," Kevin shook his head.

"Just tell her that it's a special occasion," Javier told him.

"Isn't Christmas always a special occasion?"

"Well, it's a more special occasion because Alexis is coming home. There needs to be a lot of people around, so she doesn't dwell on the fact that it's the first Christmas without her husband."

"I don't know how much help I'll be," Kevin rubbed at his neck, "I haven't seen or heard from her in eight years."

"What's up with that anyways?" Javier frowned at Kevin. "You guys were friends. She moves, and you avoid all contact with her."

"You get busy and things just slip away," Kevin said.

"It's weird."

"It happens," Kevin ran his finger down the rubber edge of the car window, "Our lives just went in different directions."

"You okay, Man?" Javier prodded his partner.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded, "Just thinking."

"Care to share?" Javi asked.

"Not right now," Kevin shook his head.

"Whatever it is, you know I got your back," Javier gave him a quick look.

"Yeah, I know," Kevin nodded. "Thanks, Bro."

Javier decided to try and distract his friend, "Any ideas what I should get Lanie for Christmas?"

"Nothing that can be used in a kitchen," Kevin smirked.

"What are you getting Jenny?" he asked, "Maybe I can borrow the idea."

"She's been dropping hints about a bracelet she saw when she was shopping with her mother."

"Jewelry and Christmas," Javi winced, "That's a bad combination."

"Only if it's a ring," Kevin said.

"That's not going to happen," Javier insisted.

"Well, not with me and Jenny. I gave her a ring a long time ago," Kevin reminded his friend. "You were five feet away, remember?"

"Yeah, I remember," Javi chuckled, "I often wonder if you just did it so that she'd stop thinking you cheated on her."

"I loved her," Kevin shook his head.

"Only good reason to get married," Javier nodded completely missing the past tense of his partner's statement. "You okay, Man? You've been weird lately."

"Yeah," he tried to shake himself out of his funk, "It's been a weird few months."

"Weird how?" Javier pressed.

"Me and Jenny," he replied, "We're having...no, never mind."

"Spill, Bro," Javier gave him a look. "I've bitched to you enough times about my love life. I think I can handle the tales of a married couple."

"We're having problems," Kevin sighed while he spun his ring around his finger, fighting the itch he hand to yank it off and throw it out the window, "We're just going through the motions. She feels like a stranger rather than my wife."

"How long has it been like this?"

"A while," Kevin admitted, trying not to think about the last time he'd been really happy.

"A while as in months?" Javi asked, "Have you tried couples' therapy?"

"You sound like my mother-in-law," Kevin rolled his eyes.

"Sorry," Javi responded, "If you want to moan and groan, I'm there for you, like I was...what was it...eight years ago when you went through something else kinda like this?"

"Yeah, it was a long time ago," Kevin avoided eye contact with Javier as he tried not to think about the absolute misery he'd felt the day Castle had come into the office and told them Alexis was gone.

"Is Sarah Grace excited for Christmas?" Javi tried to change the conversation to something he knew Kevin liked to talk about.

"Yeah. I think she's outgrown the Santa Claus bit, but she's looking forward to the holiday."

"Ah, man, I didn't ruin it for her when I dressed up as Santa last year, did I?"

"Oh, she loved that," Kevin laughed. "By the way, thanks for taking the suit off before you had the beer."

"Figured it wouldn't be good for children to see Santa getting drunk so close to Christmas Eve," he chuckled.

"I wonder if Alexis's kids still believe in Santa," Kevin thought out loud.

"I'm sure at least her youngest does," Javier responded, "She's what two...three?"

"Four," Kevin corrected. "She and Jo are only about a month apart."

"I'm horrible with that stuff," Javier responded, "Sarah Grace is eight, nine?"

"She's ten," Kevin looked at his friend.

"Wow, time flies," Javier pulled into a vacant spot at the station and threw the car into park.

"Yeah, seems like yesterday we almost burned to death the night my daughter was born," Kevin recalled.

"Don't remind me," Javier replied, "I still have nightmares about that night."

"Tell me about it," Kevin got out of the car.

 _You never have to hide things from me, Kevin. It was probably the worst night of your life wrapped up in what became the best. If you want to talk, I'm here._

"Hey, Beckett," Javi greeted her when they stepped out of the elevator, "Castle back from New Orleans yet?"

"They called an hour ago. They were in D.C. With any luck, I'll be sleeping with my husband tonight."

"Will Alexis be staying with you until she finds a place?" Javier asked while shedding his jacket.

"Yep, Alexis and her kids," Kate nodded. "The loft is going to be crowded."

"Castle hasn't found her a place yet?" Kevin asked.

"He wants her close, but she wants a place like she and Chris had in New Orleans with a backyard."

"Is it even possible to find what Alexis had in New Orleans?" Javi asked.

"Yes, if she goes to Long Island or Brooklyn or Queens," Kate said. "Castle however wants her close which means apartment."

"I'm betting Castle wins that battle," Javi chuckled, "Or at least tip the odds in his favor."

Kate looked around them and then leaned in close, "He's going to make it her Christmas gift if she fights him."

"Sounds like Castle."

"He's just worried about her being alone."

"She has the kids," Javi reminded her, "She won't be alone until they go to college."

"You know what I mean," Kate said. "Honestly, I'm kinda on his side. I was this close to a leave of absence."

"She really that bad?" Kevin's eyes oozed with concern.

"I don't know if she's that bad, or if I didn't want to leave her alone for me. Lex isn't just my stepdaughter. She's my friend. If she'd been any closer to that building, Castle and I might have been the ones who were moving."

Kevin looked away. He didn't even want to think about that possibility.

"She'll be here soon," Esposito put a hand on Kate's shoulder. "Any word from her mother?"

"Meredith sent a telegram," Kate frowned.

"Some things never change," Javier shook his head.

"When does she start at the M.E.'s office?" Kevin asked.

"Perlmutter's last day is officially December 31. Lex starts on January 1."

"Wow, that's pretty quick," Kevin replied, "Is she going to be settled by then?"

"Personally, I think she's trying to keep herself busy, so she doesn't have time to think."

"It's going to hit her eventually," Javier responded.

"And when it does, she'll be here," Kate said, "With us. Instead of New Orleans with just her kids."

They were interrupted from any further discussion by Gates who was calling them into her office to discuss a new case.

=c=c=c=c=

Alexis looked out the window at the passing scenery while her dad navigated the city traffic.

Aside from scolding the children when they moaned and groaned along the way, Alexis didn't have much to say.

Fortunately Maggie had fallen asleep about ten minutes ago and the boys were reading and listening to their iPods.

"You're quiet," Castle felt the need to point out.

"Just tired," Alexis covered, "Driving across country will do that to you."

"Not to mention packing up the house," Castle nodded. "And avoiding whoever keeps calling your cell phone."

"It's King. I'm not ready to talk to him," Alexis glanced at her phone, "He's the one that couldn't even bother to say goodbye to his godson."

"Maybe he's trying to apologize," Castle pointed out.

"Or yell at me," Alexis said. "I called the Director after I quit."

"You're trying to look after those you care about, King included," Castle rationalized her behavior, "He'll see that…eventually."

"I couldn't let him get anyone killed. He blames himself for Chris, I get that. But Meredith's parents already buried a daughter. I don't want them burying another one."

"And he'll get over it," Castle replied.

"Would you?"

"If it was someone I knew had my best interest at heart," Rick nodded.

"Thanks, Dad," Alexis smiled at him. "Do you want me to drive?"

"In this traffic, no thanks," Castle shook his head, "I'd rather be at the controls."

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "It's been a long time since I've been this far north."

"Temperature is starting to plunge. I hope you brought your long johns because you're going to need them," he chuckled.

"I kinda missed having snow during the winter," Alexis admitted.

"Hold that thought when your teeth are rattling," he replied.

"Mags has never even seen snow," Alexis turned towards her sleeping daughter, "It's going to be fun watching her build a snowman."

"She does love Frozen," Castle smiled.

"Don't, please don't," Alexis shook her head. "I love my daughter but I've seen that movie one too many times. She will sing those songs until your ears bleed."

"If she sounds anything like your mother when she sings, I believe it," Castle smirked.

"Her voice is more like Gram's," Alexis smiled, "Although it could use a bit of training."

"Maybe it's a good thing I held onto the studio," Castle said.

"You never sold it?" Alexis asked.

"Couldn't bring myself to do it," he shook his head, "It's gathering dust, but it was her sanctuary. It would be like losing her all over again."

"I miss her, too," Alexis nodded. "The first time I went to Cafe DuMonde, I remembered that story she told me about the summer before she got pregnant with you and the company she was with performed down there."

"She had a story for everywhere," Castle smiled, "It was one of her many charms."

"Remember the times she would make us go to Serendipity whenever we were all single on Valentine's Day?"

"Which was more years than I would like to admit to," he laughed, "She loved that frozen hot chocolate."

"We should do that this year," Alexis said. "Maybe not on the actual holiday but the day before or after. We could take all the kids."

"That's a lot of kids," Rick chuckled, "But I'm game if you are."

"We'll take Kate for back-up," Alexis smiled.

"And her taser," Castle nodded.

"I am not tasing my children," Alexis scoffed.

"We won't actually tase them," Castle nodded. "We'll just threaten to."

"Hunter is too smart to fall for that," Alexis chuckled, "He'd see it in our eyes that we had no intention."

"Yeah," Castle nodded as he shot a look at his oldest grandson in the rearview, "Kid has a good head on his shoulders. He's a lot like you."

"I don't know about that, Dad," she sighed, "I've made some questionable choices in my past."

"Well, one of them led to my grandson, so I can't be too angry about it."

"If only you knew," she mumbled under her breath.

"Any chance you'll ever tell me about his papa?" Castle asked quietly.

"Not right now," Alexis said.

"Is he someone that you're going to be seeing when we get back to New York?"

"Like you said, it's been eight years," Alexis said. "What are the odds he's still there?"

"Lex, I wish you trusted me with what you went through," Castle replied, "Did it end badly? Did he hurt you? Was he married?"

"Dad, not now, okay?"

"Hunter doesn't know?" Castle asked quietly.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "But just to answer one of your questions, I did the hurting."

"I find that hard to believe," Castle shook his head.

"I was really awful to him," Alexis admitted. "I hurt us both. It was part of the reason Christopher had such a hard time convincing me to give him a chance."

"If you ever want to see him, we just happen to know someone that is good at tracking people down," Castle reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze.

"Thanks, Dad," Alexis smiled a little before she looked out the window at the skyline. The sun was setting over the city. "We're just in time to see the city wake up."

-d-d-d-

Kevin looked out the window of the conference room watching the lights of the city become visible. Alexis had always said it was like watching someone wake up.

"Hey, Castle, welcome back, Man," Javi extended his hand, "How was the drive back?"

"Not bad," Castle shook his friend's hand. "Where's my wife?"

"Where is she always?" Javi nodded towards the observation room, "Put the fear of god into some poor unsuspecting suspect."

"Okay, tell her I'll be back in an hour to get her for dinner," Castle checked his watch. "Alexis and the kids are downstairs in the car. I figured if she was done for the day we could just go right from here. Since she's not, we'll go to the loft and unload the car."

"Alexis is outside?" Javi's eyes brightened, "I'll walk you down. I'd love to see her."

"Yeah, come on."

"Hey, Castle," Kevin greeted him in the hallway, "Back already?"

"Yeah, we're going down so I can say hi to Alexis. You wanna come with?"

"I can't."

"What do you mean, you can't?" Javi scoffed, "Come on, it's Alexis."

"I missed a call from Jenny. I need to call her back."

"Yet another reason that I'm not married," Javi shook his head.

"You're not married because no one will have you," Kevin took a playful shot at his partner.

"Funny," Javier shot him a look as the elevator doors closed behind him and Castle leaving Ryan alone.

Kevin clutched his phone tight, nearly breaking it in half as he went to the window. He could see Alexis getting out of the car to greet his partner with a hug and a gigantic smile.

He turned his back and leaned against the wall letting himself slide to the floor.

He sat there staring at nothing for a while, trying not to think about the happy reunion that was going on outside.

"Ryan," Beckett was attempting to get his attention. "You alright?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. He held up his phone. "Just trying for some privacy."

"On the floor?" she eyed him skeptically, "There's a chair right over there."

"No one can see me down here," Kevin said as he got up.

"What going on that you need extra privacy?" Beckett asked.

"Just a conversation with Jenny," Kevin nodded. "Castle was just here."

"Shoot, I missed them," Beckett frowned, "Did he bring Alexis and the kids up?"

"No, they stayed in the car. Javi went to say hi."

"Maybe I can catch them," Kate glanced outside to see Javi and Alexis still laughing and talking.

Kevin followed her gaze and then made himself look away, "If you hurry you might be able to."

"You coming?" Kate walked to the elevator.

"I gotta go to the bathroom. I'll see her later."

"Alright," Kate mashed the elevator button and waited for the car.

"See you tomorrow," Kevin walked towards the men's room.

"Night, Ryan," she nodded.

Once inside the men's room, Kevin checked the stalls and then locked the door before he leaned against the wall and got his breathing under control.

She was back in New York.


	5. Chapter 4

So, this is the 2nd version of this chapter. The first one we wrote didn't really sit right with us. It also happens to be my favorite so far. Let me know if you guys agree and thanks for all the replies last time.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Kevin took a deep breath and knocked on the door to Castle's loft.

It opened. He opened his mouth to greet Castle or Beckett but was staring at a blank space.

"Who are you?"

Kevin looked down to see a little redhead in a pure white dress looking at him with an adorable frown. She'd clearly been expecting someone else, Santa perhaps.

"Maggie Mae," Castle laughed when he came up behind her and lifted the little girl into his arms, "Where are your manners, Little Lady?"

"Sorry, Grandpa," she apologized before she looked at Kevin. "Hello. I'm Maggie."

"Hi, Maggie," Kevin extended his hand to her, "I'm Kevin. I work with your grandma and grandpa."

"Oh, like Uncle Javi?"

"A little better than Uncle Javi," Kevin corrected her, "That's a pretty dress you have on. I know my daughter would like a dress like that."

"Granny Merrie sent it to me," Maggie smiled. "She's in- where is she again, Grandpa?"

"California," Castle responded.

"It's a long ways away," Maggie told Kevin.

"I know," Kevin bit his lip in amusement.

"Grandpa, I want popcorn. Can you put me down, please?"

"Don't eat too much," Rick conceded to her request, "Dinner won't be too long."

"Merry Christmas, Castle," Kevin extended his hand.

"Merry Christmas. Come in," Rick invited.

"She's adorable," Kevin nodded towards Maggie.

"She's so much like her mother at that age," Rick watched Maggie work the room.

"Speaking of," Kevin looked around the room, hoping for a glimpse of Alexis but not seeing her.

"Kitchen," Castle pointed. "She and Lanie are making cider."

Kevin contemplated his options. He could be the adult and just walk over and welcome her back to New York, or he could do the cowardly thing and simply avoid her. He chose the latter.

"Hey, Ryan," Kate smiled at her friend. "Can I take your coat?"

"Hey, thanks, Kate," he greeted her with a kiss to the cheek before handing over his coat, "The place looks great."

"I had nothing to do with it. Rick and Alexis played Santa's helpers today with the kids," Kate took his coat and headed for the master bedroom.

"It kept them entertained," Castle said as he handed Ryan a beer.

"Thanks," Kevin lifted his beer in thanks before he went off to speak to his partner. "Hey, Espo. Merry Christmas."

"Hey, I was starting to think you weren't gonna show," Javier shook his hand. "No Jenny?"

"Nah, she took Sarah Grace to her parents' place," Kevin explained before greeting Lanie with a kiss to her cheek, "Merry Christmas, Lanie."

"Merry Christmas, Kevin," the doctor smiled at him. "I'm glad to see you."

"You too," he nodded, "How'd my partner do with the gift this year? He vowed no frying pan."

Lanie giggled, "He went with an antique set of scalpels. I was very impressed."

"That's remarkably well thought out, Espo," Kevin patted his friend's back, "I'm impressed."

"Thank you," Javier smiled before he looked over at Alexis. "Hey Lanie, how's she doing?"

"A little quiet," Lanie nodded. "But I actually think this is helping."

"You talked to her yet?" Javier asked his partner.

"No," Kevin shook his head.

"Since when are you shy, Ryan?" Javier snorted with amusement.

"I'm not being shy," Kevin shook his head. "I just don't want to bother her."

"Come on, Detective," Lanie linked arms with him, "I'll introduce you."

"Lanie, we've met," Kevin resisted her attempts to lead him in Alexis's direction.

"Then, I'll help you say hello," Lanie smiled at him before she looked towards the spot Alexis had just been and frowned. "Where'd she go?"

"Maybe she's avoiding Ryan," Javi chuckled.

"Funny," Kevin shook his head while looking around. He saw her go into her dad's office. "Why don't you two go test out the mistletoe?"

"Good idea, Partner," Javier pulled Lanie in the opposite direction.

Kevin adjusted his tie before stepping towards Alexis. There was no point in putting off their interaction any longer. People might become suspicious, and that was the last thing either of them wanted.

Just as he stepped forward, Hunter came careening past him with Cade on his heels, and Kevin stopped moving. For a moment he was sure he stopped breathing.

"You okay, Ryan?" Beckett came towards him upon seeing his distress, "You still not feeling well?"

"I'm fine. You know what, I haven't said hello to Alexis yet. I think I saw her go into Castle's office. Excuse me for a moment," Kevin said before he walked towards Castle's office.

Alexis could sense Kevin's presence before he made himself know.

"Hey, Kev," she spoke without turning towards him.

"How are you, Lex?" he closed the door and leaned against it.

"Hanging in there," she turned towards him, "You?"

"I'm okay," he nodded.

"You look good," she smiled slightly, "How's Sarah Grace?"

"She's good," he nodded. "I'm sorry about Christopher."

"Thank you," she said.

She turned towards the pictures again, not wanting to run the risk of making eye contact. He'd always had a way of locking eyes and finding a way to stare into her soul. Her frazzled state couldn't handle it.

"I hear you're joining Lanie in the M.E.'s office," Kevin took a step towards her. His hand gravitated towards the small of her back, but he resisted at the last moment.

"Yeah, it was time for a change," Alexis said. "I couldn't stay in New Orleans any longer."

"I can imagine how difficult it must be for you and your children," he swallowed hard on the last bit.

"Kevin, about Hunter..." she began.

"Don't," he cut her off, "We can do that another time."

"But he's..." she began again.

"I know," he responded, "Or rather I just figured it out, but now isn't the time. After the holidays, maybe when you've had some time to adjust."

"You really think time is going to help?" she asked. "Because so far, time and distance haven't done anything for me."

"You really want to do this now?"

"No," she stammered as she turned towards him again. Her eyes locked with his. Nothing had changed in the way he looked at her. His feelings were still clearly there. The pain of all those years ago suddenly slammed into her with surprising force. It was all she could do to keep the tears at bay.

"Lex," he stepped towards her. She backed away, colliding with the wall. He stopped. "How could you not tell me?"

"I'm sorry," she shook as she spoke. She knew he'd never hurt her, but all the pain and anger of eight years ago on top of her grief was suddenly overwhelming. She could barely breathe. "I was scared."

"Of what?" he couldn't understand. "I loved you."

"Of everything," she wiped at the rogue tear that fell, "I was twenty-two and pregnant with a married man's child. I didn't know how you'd take it. I was afraid that you'd think I trapped you into a relationship...that I got pregnant on purpose so you'd leave Jenny."

"You know me better than that. There was never any trapping," Kevin shook his head. "I was where I wanted to be. I would've been with you because I wanted to, not because you'd gotten pregnant."

"You didn't come after me," Alexis stated, "You knew where I was going, you could have..."

"You left," he cut her off, "You told me to leave you alone. You just took off. You changed your phone number. I thought I was respecting your wishes. I thought you didn't love me anymore."

"Well, I guess we didn't know each other as well as we thought," Alexis said quietly. "Merry Christmas."

She walked around him to get out of the office.

"Alexis wait," he reached for her, but it was too late. She was gone...again.

He looked at the pictures on Castle's wall and found a picture of Hunter from a previous Christmas. He reached out and lightly traced the boy's face. The boy had his smile, his eyes.

"Not again," he said quietly.

"You ready to eat, Partner," Javi found Kevin in Castle's office staring at the pictures.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"You alright?" Javi caught the turmoil in his partner's eyes, "Is it about Jenny?"

"No, it's not," Kevin smiled. "I'm hungry."

"Good," Kate said. "Because we have lots of food."

"Then let's eat," Kevin followed his hostess into the dining room where the parents were getting the children situated to eat.

"Miss Maggie, Mr. Beary will be fine on the couch. He loves the couch," Castle smiled.

"Are you sure?" the little red head reluctantly followed her grandfather to the table, "He looks lonely."

"He'll talk to the pillows," Alexis told her daughter. "I do it all the time."

"What if he gets sad?" Maggie frowned, "The pillows won't talk back."

"I've got an idea," Kate said. "Jo, where's Miss Peep?"

"In my room," her daughter responded.

"Go get her," Kate motioned. "She can keep Mr. Beary company while we eat."

"Okay," Jo hopped off her chair and scurried towards her room.

"Kids have such vivid imaginations," Castle commented while they waited for his youngest daughter to return.

"Yeah, just _kids_ ," Javier snorted.

Alexis smiled as she took a seat on the other side of Lanie.

Once Jo had returned after setting her stuffed animal next to Maggie's, the family said grace before dishing out their mean. The room was alive with animated conversation.

"Kate, where's your dad?"

"Aunt Theresa's," Kate said. "He'll be here tomorrow."

"How's he doing these days?" Javi asked while stuffing food into his mouth.

"He's good. He's glad to have his great-grandchildren back in town," Kate smiled. "He can't wait to spoil them along with his grandkids."

"And those great-grandchildren will be happy to be spoiled," Alexis chimed in.

"I don't think Castle needs help spoiling Maggie," Kevin nodded to his friend who was sneaking his granddaughter a sweet that Alexis has just told her she couldn't eat.

"You're not spoiled, are you, Mags?" Rick tickled his granddaughter.

"Nope," the girl shook her head from side to side.

"You're so spoiled," Alexis tickled her other side.

Maggie giggled and snuggled into Rick to get away from her mom's tickling hands.

Kevin watched Alexis with fascination. This was a side of her he'd never seen. She was a natural as a mother. It made his heart ache even more.

"Excuse me," a boy said from his side. He found himself face to face with Hunter, who was standing in the space between his chair and Javi's.

"Uh, can I help you?" Kevin stammered out.

"Can I have the rolls?"

"Sure, buddy, here you go," Javier handed him the basket of rolls.

"Thanks Uncle Javi," Hunter smiled before he went to sit with his brother again.

"You sure you're feeling alright," Javier nudged Kevin.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Kevin said while he looked across the table at Alexis, who had been watching the exchange.

"Excuse me," she left the table abruptly.

"Alexis?" Castle looked worried.

"I'll go," Kate volunteered.

Kevin flinched in his chair. He'd wanted to be the one to comfort her despite how inappropriate it would have looked.

He watched Kate pass by Rick's chair, a hand rubbing his shoulder gently for comfort and a stab of jealousy went through him. He wanted that. He wanted the wordless gestures and the time spent just being with each other. He hadn't shared those with anyone in so long.

"You okay, Alexis?" Kate found her stepdaughter back in Castle's office.

"I'm such a mess," Alexis reached for a tissue to dry her eyes. "I'm all over the place with emotions. It's worse than when I was pregnant with Cade."

"Is there any chance you could be pregnant now?"

"No," Alexis shook her head. "None."

"Okay," Kate took her at her word, "You have to go easy on yourself. You're going through a lot right now."

"I know," Alexis sat in her dad's chair and looked around. Then she started to laugh.

"What?"

"Gram," Alexis shook her head. "She took over Dad's office to write that one woman show of hers. When he read the script, he needed a bottle of scotch."

"The whole thing where she slept with his agent?" Kate realized.

Alexis nodded.

"I thought Castle was going to die from humiliation," Kate snickered.

Alexis snorted with laughter, "It was so funny."

"I swear she lived just to put Castle in his place," Kate laughed, "She was an expert at it."

"God, I miss her right now," Alexis sighed. "But at the same time, I see so much of her in Maggie that I would be frightened to have them know each other."

"It would have been entertaining," Kate placed an arm around Alexis's shoulders.

"Yes, it would've been," Alexis nodded her head.

"Come on," Kate nudged her, "Let's go back to the table and eat."

"Go," Alexis touched the tissue to her eyes again, "I'll be there in a minute. I don't want the kids to see me like this."

"Okay," Kate hugged her. "Take your time."

"Kate, thanks," Alexis smiled.

"Where's Alexis?" Rick asked his wife when she returned to the table without his daughter.

"She'll be here in a moment," Kate gave him a reassuring smile.

"Okay?" Rick asked.

"She's getting there," Kate nodded.

Alexis returned to the table a few minutes later to be greeted by her daughter and the hug she offered.

"Thank you, Maggie Mae," Alexis hugged her tight, "That's the best Christmas gift I'll get this year."

"I guess I can take the one I bought back then," Rick smiled.

"Don't even think about it, Dad," Alexis told him.

Dinner concluded shortly thereafter and after dinner drinks were poured.

Alexis was sitting on a stool watching the scene her dad and all the kids were making. Kate and Lanie were over by the piano teasing Javier.

"You okay?" Kevin brought her a drink.

"Thanks. Yeah, I'm great."

"You're still a lousy liar," he sat down next to her.

"I never could fool you, could I?" she took a sip of the offered drink. She smiled when she realized he still knew what her favorite alcoholic beverage was.

"Not from the first time we had coffee," he gave her a sidelong look.

"It some ways it seems like a lifetime ago, and in other ways it seems like only yesterday," she admitted.

"I miss it sometimes," he confessed. "It was…"

"Simple," she smiled.

"I was going to say special," he replied.

"It was that, too," she agreed.

Kevin looked to where Castle had Maggie and Jo behind the couch. They were planning something.

"What's he up to?" Kevin motioned towards Castle and the girls.

"He's teaching them how to get the boys," Alexis smiled. "He does it because they're outnumbered and younger."

"Smart man," Kevin chuckled, "Teach them to fend off boys early in life. I should have thought of that with Sarah Grace."

"She's ten. It's not too late."

"Good point," he nodded, "I'll have to get to work."

"When in doubt, go for the instep," Alexis replied, "They won't expect it, and when they're hopping around in pain is when you can hit them where it really counts."

"Ouch. You're vicious," Kevin smirked. "Glad I stayed on your good side."

"I seem to remember causing you a little physical pain," Alexis smirked. "I did spill coffee on you."

"I recovered quickly," he winked at her.

Alexis looked at his arm which was visible now that his shirt sleeves were rolled up, "It healed nicely."

"It was the gentle touch of the nurse that tended to me," he winked a second time.

"Stop it," she nudged him with her shoulder, "Someone is going to see that."

"See what?"

"You acting like you are," Alexis said. "Things are different now."

"Different how?" he challenged her.

Alexis looked at Hunter, "He exists. That's different."

"Yeah, that is different," Kevin agreed. "I know about him."

"I wanted to tell you," she glanced towards his hand, wanting desperately to hold it.

"Then why didn't you?" he asked.

"It's a long story."

"I have time," he told her.

"Another time," she replied, "The children are going to want to get to bed soon."

"I want to know him," Kevin glanced towards his son.

"Not just yet," she shook her head, "Chris just died. He needs to process that first."

"I don't mean as his-I just want to know who he is," Kevin said.

"After the holidays," she offered.

"Okay," he nodded. "But I'm not going away, Lex, and I'm not letting go again."

"I need time, Kev," she swallowed hard.

"I'll give it to you, because I'm gonna need time too."

"For what?"

"To end my marriage," Kevin said.

"Kev, don't," she scolded him, "Don't do that...not for me."

"It's not just for you. It's for us."

"I can't guarantee there will be an us."

"I'm still going to try," he chanced a brush of his fingers against her shoulder. The electric current that had always been between them, hit him in full force, and he knew that she felt it too.

Neither of them noticed Javier watching them from across the room. He had a pretty good vantage point from where he stood facing Lanie and Beckett, who had their backs to Alexis and Kevin.

There was a spark in Kevin's eyes that Javier hadn't seen in quite awhile...years in fact. He wondered if there was more going on between Alexis and Kevin than he'd ever realized.

"Javi, what do you think?" Lanie asked.

"Sorry, think about what?" he shifted his focus back to his girlfriend.

"Having New Year's Eve at the Old Haunt," Kate explained. "We close down the place and just have dinner."

"I'm in," Javier responded instantly, "Sounds like fun."

"Good. It'll be a nice way to end the year."

"And start a new one," he kissed Lanie's cheek softly.

"Charmer," Lanie smiled. "I need a refill."

"One more," Javi glanced at his watch, "We should be leaving the kids to get ready for Santa's arrival soon."

"Yeah. I think Maggie's about to crash," Kate looked over to where her granddaughter was fighting a losing battle.

"Come on, Peanut," Alexis lifted the sleepy girl into her arms, "Let's get you changed into your pajamas."

"I'm not tired," the little girl protested even though she was nearly asleep as her head came to rest against Alexis's shoulder.

"I know, but remember the song? Jump in bed, cover up your head, 'cause Santa Claus comes tonight," Alexis sang softly as she carried her youngest upstairs.

The little girl muttered along until they were out of earshot.

"That's my cue," Kevin glanced at his watch, "I should be getting home. Sarah Grace and Jenny should be home by now."

"I'll get your coat," Rick offered.

"I got it Castle," Kevin headed for the master bedroom. "You've got your own daughter to put to bed."

"Partner, I'll walk you out," Javi offered.

"What about my drink?" Lanie held up her glass.

"I'll be right back for you, Darling," he assured her.

"Yeah, you better."

"I'm good to walk myself out," Kevin grabbed his coat and felt for his gloves.

"Humor me," Javi slapped at his back.

"Alright," Kevin nodded as he buttoned himself up. On the walk out, Kevin asked, "What's up, Partner?"

"After the holidays, you and me need to have a talk," Javi motioned between the two of them.

"Alright," Kevin nodded, curious as to the discussion his partner wanted to have. He thought perhaps it was relationship advice which would have been odd considering he'd just confessed to Javi that his relationship with Jenny was rocky. "See you in a couple of days. Merry Christmas."

"You too," Javi gave him a quick hug and watched him leave the building.

As Javier walked back into the elevator he had to wonder when the last time he'd seen Kevin smile like he had that night.

He put the thoughts out of his mind so that he could enjoy the holidays.


	6. Chapter 5

"Thank you," Kate said to the delivery boy when she handed him a tip.

"It's the job," the boy nodded as he pocketed the money, "Happy New Year."

"To you too," Kate smiled and closed the door with the stack of pizzas in her hand, "Kids, dinner."

"Did you get sausage?" Hunter came running in with an eager smile.

"Of course," she tapped his head with the boxes before handing them to him. "Think you can get these to the table without dropping them?"

Hunter was careful, and Kate smiled as he set the boxes down without incident. It was funny. Something about the way he walked reminded her of someone. She just couldn't put her finger on who he reminded her of.

"Kate, do you have any earrings I can borrow?" Alexis came into the entryway, "I don't even know where to start looking in all the boxes around here."

"Sure," Kate smiled while she took notice of the dress Alexis had on. "Lanie did good. That's a gorgeous dress."

"I feel half naked."

"You look great," Kate assured her.

"Thanks," Alexis smiled. "Where's Dad?"

"Probably getting the kids all riled up," Kate sighed, "I swear sometimes it feels like I'm raising four kids."

"I know the feeling," Alexis leaned against a column. "Chris used to rough house more than the boys sometimes."

"You almost ready?" Kate asked, "Lanie and Espo should be here soon. We're carpooling. Lanie volunteered to be the designated driver tonight."

"I was going to do that," Alexis frowned, "I didn't want to start my first day hung over."

"Lanie doesn't want to chance going overboard. Don't forget, we're also celebrating the end of Perlmutter."

"Wonder if we can keep Dad in line. Perlmutter wasn't exactly his favorite person," Alexis replied.

"He wasn't so bad," Kate amended. "He just never appreciated your dad."

"That's just wrong on so many levels," the daddy's girl in Alexis came out.

"He's an acquired taste," Kate wrapped an arm around her stepdaughter, "How about we wrestle him away from the kids so we can get on with our evening?"

"Good idea. I can't believe your dad volunteered to sit for all of them tonight."

"Aunt Theresa is joining him," Kate assured her, "They'll be more than up to the task of watching six kids."

"Can I borrow a coat? The one I bought is warm but not warm enough for this dress."

"Help yourself," Kate nodded, "I have dozens."

"Thank you," Alexis smiled as she headed for the coat closet. "I got rid of most of my warmer coats a long time ago. I didn't need them in New Orleans."

"You'll definitely need them here," Kate replied, "We'll have to go shopping soon."

"First time we both have a free day," Alexis nodded.

 _ding-dong_

"That'll be Espo and Lanie. Castle! Our ride's here."

There was a chorus of groans from both Castle and the kids as he wrestled himself free.

The six of them came running into the entryway to say their farewells to their parents.

"Mommy, please can't we come?" Maggie looked at Alexis with hopeful eyes. Her mother was dressed all fancy, and she didn't want to miss out on the fun.

"Sorry, Peanut," Alexis kissed both of her cheeks, "But we're going to be out way past your bedtime. Besides you're going to have so much fun with Jo."

"But I want to go, too," Jo looked to Kate.

"Same goes for you," Kate kissed her own daughter.

"You don't want to leave Pop-pop here alone with all the boys do you?" Castle knelt between his daughter and granddaughter.

"No," the two spoke in unison.

"That's right," Kate said. "You two have to keep the boys from tying him up like they do Uncle Javi."

Maggie's pout was more pronounced than Jo's. She didn't like her mother going out, especially not without her father.

"Miss Maggie, I will call before you go to bed, okay?" Alexis smiled at her daughter. "I love you."

"I love you, Mommy," she tossed her arms around her mother's neck.

"Be good. That goes double for you boys," Alexis looked at Cade and Hunter. "Any bad reports and you two are grounded until Valentine's Day."

The boys nodded and followed their sister's lead of hugging their mom.

"Same goes for you two," Rick looked at his own boys.

They nodded in understanding.

"Anytime guys," Javier stated impatiently.

"Bye, Jim," Alexis waved.

Kate took a moment to say goodbye to her father and give him some last minute instructions.

"I knew that dress would be beautiful on you," Lanie took a moment to give herself credit for Alexis's outfit.

"Yeah, but I wish there was a bit more of it," Alexis pulled at the fabric a bit before slipping on her coat.

"Well-" Javier started.

"One word and you're start the new year in traction," Lanie said.

"I'll help her," Castle glared at his friend.

"Fine, I'll just go mute for the entire evening," Javi made a showing of zippering his lips.

"Good plan," Kate smirked.

-d-d-d-

"Wow, those are beautiful," Kate said of the flowers on the bar. "I didn't realize you were having the place decorated."

"We weren't," Castle eyed them curiously.

"They were left for Alexis," the bartender nodded in the red head's direction before gathering her belongings to leave for the evening.

"Me?" Alexis asked. "Is there a card?"

"There might have been when they left the flower shop, but they didn't arrive with one."

"Who would send me flowers?" she looked towards her father to see if he was the culprit.

"Not me," Castle shook his head.

"Weird," Alexis commented. "Oh well. At least they're pretty."

"So, where's Ryan? Aren't he and Jenny joining us?" Castle asked of Javier.

"Last I heard they were," Javier shrugged.

=d=d=d=d=

"No, Jenny, I am not coming home just so I can listen to you tell me again that you'd rather go to your sister's party instead of the Old Haunt. I'm spending tonight in the Old Haunt. You do what you want."

"More troubles, Partner?" Javi came up behind Kevin as he abruptly ended the call to his wife.

"Just a difference of opinion," Kevin said.

"You need to talk?" he asked.

"No," Kevin tucked his phone into his jacket. "I need to get drunk."

"Right this way," Javier opened the door to the bar.

"Hey, Ryan," Kate greeted him with a hug, "I was beginning to wonder if you'd join us. Where's Jenny?"

"Previous commitment," Kevin said. "You look great."

"Thanks," she replied, "Need a drink?"

"Absolutely," Kevin nodded.

"Go see my stepdaughter. She's playing bartender tonight."

"Drinks aren't going to be watered down tonight," Javi clapped Kevin's back.

"Damn," Kevin muttered under his breath when he saw Alexis's dress.

"Don't make any comments on the dress. Castle's touchy about it."

"Thanks for the warning," Kevin replied, "You need anything, Javi?"

"Just filled up," Javier showed off his drink.

"Evening," Kevin ambled up to the bar.

"What can I get for you, Flatfoot?"

"Flatfoot?" he raised a curious brow.

"Gumshoe?" Alexis tried. "Sorry. Noir marathon the other day with my dad."

"Ready to start work tomorrow?" he chuckled.

"God yes," she sighed.

"Bored?"

"And tired of my dad's hovering," Alexis confessed.

"Castle's got that overprotective father thing down pat. I feel bad for Jo when she gets older."

"So do I," Alexis nodded.

"That's a nice dress," Kevin motioned towards her attire, "Not your usual style though."

"Lanie gave it to me," Alexis said.

"Of course," Kevin nodded. "Nice flowers."

"Yeah," Alexis agreed. "Thanks by the way."

"What's that mean?" he tilted his head to the side in confusion, "I didn't send you any flowers."

"They're not from you?" Alexis looked confused.

"No," he shook his head, "I get that they're my style, but I didn't send them this time. Wish I had."

"Dad swears they weren't from him and they're not from you," Alexis looked worried now.

 _Ring-ring_

"That's me," Alexis reached under the bar and grabbed her purse, digging out her cell phone. "Oh. I'll be right back."

"Take your time," Kevin waited patiently for her to return so he could get a drink.

Alexis headed for the office.

Kevin checked his watch after a while and saw it was going on ten minutes since Alexis had disappeared into the office. He decided to check on her.

"Thanks for calling, Meredith," Alexis was pacing around in circles, "Have a Happy New Year."

"Everything okay?" Kevin asked after she hung up. He heard Meredith and immediately thought of Alexis's mother, but then thought better of it. She had never called Meredith by her given name. It must have been a friend from New Orleans.

Alexis looked up, "Yeah. Just some news."

"Good news, I hope," Kevin leaned against the doorframe.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "Found out who the flowers are from."

"Don't keep me in suspense," Kevin replied, "I'd like to know who the competition is."

"Chris's old boss," Alexis smiled. "He did it to let me know he was better now."

"Seems a little overboard for an old boss," Kevin stated.

"We got into it just before I left," she admitted, "The fight was the reason I ended up quitting and moving home."

Kevin came took a step further into the office and closed the door, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Alexis released a heavy sigh, "After Chris died, his boss, King, went off the deep end, straight into the bottom of any alcohol bottle he could get his hands on. He even missed Chris's funeral because he was more interesting in getting his load on. A week or so later, he chased after a suspect and just opened fire in a bad part of town. It turned into a shootout that almost got Chris's partner, Meredith, shot. I lost it. We exchanged words, and I quit."

"Jeez," Kevin said after a moment. "Lex, I'm sorry. You and your kids deserved better."

"But sounds like King's back on the wagon now so to speak," Alexis replied, "The flowers were his way of apologizing."

"Sad but true, cops tend to use the bottle to escape," Kevin admitted quietly.

"Oh, speaking of which, you came to the bar for a drink. What will it be?" Alexis went toward the door.

"Lex, we need to talk," he reached for her hand.

"Kev, our family is waiting outside that door. Now's not the best time for an in-depth discussion," Alexis said, but she didn't pull her hand away.

"Then pick a day and time," he held her hand tight, "I meant what I said at Christmas. I'm not giving up on us."

"I wish you were a little more of a jerk about things. It would make it so much easier not to like you," Alexis said.

"I'm not that guy," he reminded her, "Please, Lex. You owe me at least a discussion."

"I know I do, but do you really want to have it tonight?"

"It can be any night," he offered her a temporary out, "But please don't brush me off."

"I can't brush you off," Alexis reminded him. "You're like one of those thorny balls that get stuck on clothes."

"Dinner," he stated hopefully, "Any night within the next week. No expectations. Just two friends catching up after eight years."

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "Jenny's not coming tonight?"

"No," he shook his head, "We aren't really seeing eye to eye right now."

"I'm sorry," Alexis said. "I really am."

"This is a long time coming," Kevin waved off her need for an apology, "This goes back before you and me."

"Still sucks," Alexis frowned. "That means you don't have someone to kiss at midnight."

"I'll kiss Javi," he shrugged, "He'll enjoy it."

Alexis giggled, "Lanie might not be happy. You can give me a kiss, if you want."

"Tempting," he shook off the suggestion while his eyes trailed down her figure to appreciate the dress she was wearing without risk of injury at the hands of her overprotective father, "But that would be highly inappropriate. I wouldn't be able to stop with a simple kiss to the cheek."

"I don't think I said it had to be on the cheek," Alexis smiled a little.

Kevin's eyes closed as the images of them together flooded his mind. "You're playing with fire, Castle."

"LaSalle," she corrected him softly.

"Right," he nodded. "Sorry."

"It's okay. It happens. You've known me for a long time."

"We'd better get out there before someone comes looking for us," he swallowed hard.

"Yeah. I owe you a drink."

"Especially since it's on Castle's tab."

"What are you drinking?" Alexis asked as she returned to her place behind the bar.

"I'll take a beer," Kevin nodded.

"You can do better than that," she challenged him.

"Scotch," he smiled.

"On the rocks, like usual?" she asked.

"Please," Kevin nodded.

"Coming up."

"Hey, there you are," Javier joined the two. "Thought you ran off."

"No, I had a phone call and Kevin had to use the facilities."

"Come on you two," Javi motioned for them to follow, "Castle is threatening to pull out the karaoke machine. Help me and Kate talk him out of it."

"Dad, really? Every time you pull that thing out, you end up singing _Piano Man_ and crying," Alexis followed the boys.

"I was going to mix it up tonight," Castle vowed.

"Dad, do you remember what happened when you and Kate visited me and Chris a few years ago? We took you guys to that bar. You got up for the karaoke contest, and we all ended up in the emergency room because you needed stitches."

"That wasn't my fault," Castle defended himself.

"Really?" Kate said. "I think it was considering you heckled the six foot SWAT officer as he sang."

"He sang my song. What was I supposed to do?"

"Pick another song," Alexis and Kate said in unison.

"I'm open to suggestions," Castle stated finally, "We've got a couple hours until midnight. How should we fill them?"

"Dinner, maybe some dancing," Kate said.

"Bad jokes and old stories or old jokes and bad stories," Alexis filled in.

"You asked for it," Castle replied. He had dozens of stories he could share and even more jokes.

"Food first," Lanie said.

"I'll see what I can rustle us up in the kitchen," Castle quickly disappeared.

"We have to hide this," Alexis pointed to the karaoke machine. "And Lanie, don't think I don't know that this was partly your idea."

"All I said was that we needed some entertainment before the ball dropped. He thought up karaoke all on his own," Lanie replied.

"Why didn't you discourage him before he got the machine out?" Kate asked.

"You know how he gets," Lanie replied.

"Come on Espo, let's put this somewhere so Castle doesn't get any bright ideas later," Kevin said.

"Thank you," Alexis mouthed.

"With pleasure," Javi followed his partner's lead.

"Let's get refills," Kate said to the girls.

Alexis went behind the bar again and filled everyone's drinks while they waited for Castle to return.

"What happened to the jukebox?" Alexis looked around them.

"You remember Karpowski's brother? Shy guy, couldn't get a date," Esposito filled in.

"Right."

"They switched him to vice which improved his confidence enough to talk to girls, he managed to get engaged, and his bachelor party turned into a brawl that took out the jukebox."

"That's a shame," Alexis frowned, "We need to get Dad to replace it."

"Well, for the time being," Kate leaned over the bar and found the switch, "We still have the stereo."

"How about a dance?" Javi extended his hand to Alexis.

"It'd be a pleasure, Detective," Alexis smiled as she took his hand.

"And what am I, chopped liver?" Lanie looked at her date for the evening.

"Lady looked like she needed to dance," Javier explained.

"Do you mind, Lanie?"

"Go," Lanie waved them off.

Kevin quickly masked the jealousy he felt when Javier pulled Alexis into his arms and began swaying to the music.

"C'mon Ryan," Kate grabbed his hand. "We haven't danced since your wedding."

"Watch your toes," he warned her, "I'm no Fred Astaire."

"You're not so bad, certainly no worse than Castle," Kate commented as they began their own dance. "You wanna talk about it?"

"Talk about what?" he asked.

"Life, love, why your wife isn't here," Kate said quietly.

"We're going through some stuff," Kevin admitted.

Kate let go of his hand and linked her hands at the base of his neck, "This isn't recent, is it?"

"No," Kevin admitted.

"As a woman, I can offer advice from our perspective, if you want help."

"I appreciate the offer, Beckett, but this is something I have to figure out on my own."

"I'm sorry, Kevin," Kate said. "But if it helps, while there are times when I want to strangle Rick, there isn't anyone I'd rather be with at the end of the day."

"Yeah, I know the feeling," Kevin nodded as he eyes Alexis over Kate's shoulder.

"It's been good having Alexis home," Kate followed Kevin's eyes, "I think it's been good for her too."

"Yeah, it's good seeing her face again. I wish she'd smile a little more."

"That's going to take time," Kate sighed.

"Okay, we have dinner," Castle brought in boxes of Chinese, buckets of chicken, and bags with burgers and fries.

"What did you do? Call for take-out?" Alexis laughed at the offerings.

"No, I went up the street and made my way down."

"Figures," Kate shook her head, "Put it on the bar. I'll get plates."

"I got it, Kate," Alexis volunteered.

"Thanks, Bud," Kate called after her.

"I'll give her a hand," Kevin walked after her.

In the kitchen, Alexis was grabbing clean plates when Kevin came up behind her, nearly startling her into dropping the plates on the floor.

"Sorry," Kevin said sheepishly. "I guess you didn't hear the door."

"Kevin, I got this," she assured him when he tried to take the plates out of her hands.

"I want to help," Kevin told her.

"Fine," she handed them over before they fell to the floor and created unwanted attention.

"Thank you," Kevin replied when Alexis grabbed silverware as he started to walk out.

"Wait," Alexis said.

He turned around, "Yes?"

"You can't keep doing this."

"Doing what?" he looked to her in confusion.

"Following me around. Getting me alone. People are going to start wondering why the very married Kevin Ryan is following around his best friend's daughter."

"I'm just being helpful," Kevin responded, "It's what a gentleman does."

"And following me into the back office before?"

"You're right," he responded after a moment, "I'm sorry, I'll stop."

"It's not that I don't appreciate you caring or like talking to you, it's just I want to tell my dad what happened between us on my own terms. I don't want him finding out because he overhears a conversation he shouldn't."

"I know," he nodded, "I don't want that either, especially since it's my neck on the line too."

Alexis stepped closer to him and gently laid a hand on the side of his face, "Kate told me she gave you my number."

"Yeah," he closed his eyes reflexively at her touch.

"Use it," she smiled. "I'd like my friend back."

"Friends have coffee, right?"

"Yes, they do. They also give each other small kisses at midnight on New Year's."

"Do you really think I'll be able to restrain myself?" he chuckled.

"With my father nearby, yes," she nodded, "Otherwise that neck you were worried about will be rung, and not in a pleasant way. Come on, let's go eat."

"After you," he motioned her with his head.

"Gentleman to the end," Alexis backed into the kitchen door and let him through with the plates.

"Finally, I'm starving," Javier called.

"Keep your pants on, Espo," Alexis rolled her eyes, "We were gone for all of two minutes."

"Bar or tables?" Castle asked.

"Bar," Alexis took a seat and grabbed a burger.

"So, who has a resolution that they're willing to share?" Beckett asked.

"I resolve to move out of the loft before Valentine's Day," Alexis smiled sweetly.

"I resolve to make sure that you stay on the island," Castle challenged his daughter.

"Dad, I am not having this argument again. Someone, anyone, help."

"I resolve to back up my partner, no matter what," Espo chimed in, hoping to save Alexis from another argument with her father.

"You made that resolution last year, Javi," Kevin called out his partner.

"And last year was the first time I kept a resolution," Javier responded, "Stick with what you know, Bro."

"Kate? You started this."

"I resolve to keep Castle out of his daughter's business," Kate replied, "By reminding him that she is a grown woman with her own family and able to make her own choices."

"You're my favorite stepmother. Don't tell Gina," Alexis giggled.

"Kevin?" Espo prodded his partner.

"I resolve to make the woman I love smile at least once a day," Kevin nodded.

"Jenny's a lucky girl," Kate smiled.

"That leaves you, Lanie," Alexis ducked her head.

"I resolve to spend less time with dead people," Lanie smiled.

After they'd finished their dinner and cleaned up, Alexis wandered over to the pool table. She ran her fingers over the wood and frowned.

"Dad, did you get a new table?"

"Yeah," Rick confirmed, "Same bar fight that took out the jukebox took out the pool table."

"That's a shame," Alexis frowned, "I always liked that table."

"Me too," Kevin smiled at Alexis. "I had that thing mapped out. I couldn't lose."

"Is that so?" Rick's ears perked up, "Up for a game, Ryan?"

"Rick, why don't you change your resolution to not making a fool of yourself?" Kate said.

"What do you say, Detective?" Rick continued to bait him, "Say a buck a ball?"

"Dad, I've seen you play pool. I've heard stories about Ryan play pool. Just give him your wallet now," Alexis advised as she took a seat.

"Come on, Castle, it's the holidays," Kevin tried to get out of the challenge, "Let's just keep it friendly tonight."

"What's the matter, Detective?" Castle refused to back down, "Scared I'll beat you?"

"I'd be more worried that you lose your next book advance," Kevin responded confidently.

"Take him for it, Ry," Esposito called out.

"We tried, Kate," Alexis shrugged. "Drink?"

"Yeah, we're going to need it," Kate replied, "Your dad just doesn't know when to walk away."

"Well, if he'd walked away when you told him to, my siblings wouldn't exist."

"Fair point," Kate laughed.

"You going to break, Castle?" Kevin sifted through the cue sticks until he found one that he liked.

 _Alright, you take the cue like this and line up your shot.  
You're enjoying this, aren't you?_

"You first," Castle motioned.

"No, I think you should break," Kevin replied, "Once I get going, you're not going to get a turn."

"Someone's sure of himself," Castle smirked.

"Kevin seems awfully confident," Kate turned towards Alexis. "Is he some sort of pool shark?"

"You know as much as I do," Alexis bit her lip to keep from laughing. Technically, she wasn't supposed to know how skilled he was.

"My boy can play," Javier said quietly. "Castle's going to lose big time."

"This is going to be expensive, isn't it," Kate groaned.

"Dad can afford it," Alexis laughed at the look on her stepmother's face.

"I know, but I just wish he'd listen once in a while when we tell him something's a bad idea," Kate frowned.

"You married him," Lanie reminded her.

"I wish someone would have told me what a bad idea that was," Kate laughed.

"Liar," Alexis teased. "You'd marry my dad over and over again."

"Sad but true."

"Maybe you should take it easy on him," Alexis spoke quietly to Kevin while he chalked his cue stick.

"I'll make it look good," he winked at her.

"You're mean," Alexis frowned.

"I was easy on you," he reminded her.

"We weren't playing for a buck a ball," she replied.

"No, we played for something much more interesting."

Alexis could feel the flush starting to spread across her face as she recalled how their pool lesson had ended.

"I miss that table, too," he whispered before he turned to face the table.

Rick had broken the table and balls scattered about, but none had gone in.

"Get comfortable, Castle," Kevin rolled up his sleeves to take his turn.

"Oh this isn't going to end well," Alexis leaned against the wall to watch her dad's ego take a beating.

Kevin promptly ran the table.

"Damn," Lanie drawled. "You've been holding out on us, Ryan."

"I had a life before you all knew me," Kevin re-chalked his stick while Javier racked up the balls.

"You play pool, Alexis?" Lanie asked.

"No, I'm getter at darts," she said.

"How about we play for quarters?" Lanie suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Alexis nodded as she set up the board. "Javi? Kate? You want in?"

"I'm good," Javi filled up his mug with beer, "I think I'm going to watch my boy wipe the floor with Castle."

"I'm in," Kate replied.

"You two play first," Alexis said. "I'll play winner."

"You first, Beckett," Lanie stated.

"I'm not getting hustled here, am I, Lanie?"

"By little ol' me?" Lanie winked.

Alexis giggled as she took a seat in a booth to watch.

Lanie didn't know what hit her as Kate ended up being the pro.

She looked back at the pool table as Kevin leaned over to take a shot. He caught her eye and smiled as he took his shot.

Alexis felt herself blushing.

 _On the table? That's what you want?  
That's what I want._

"Okay, you win," Lanie was saying. "Alexis, you're up."

"I hope you're up for this, Bud," Kate smiled confidently, "It's been awhile, hasn't it?"

"Yeah, it has. I haven't played in a while," Alexis said innocently.

Kevin watched them set up for another round with a grin. He knew that look in Alexis's eyes.

"Get her, Girl," Lanie encouraged Alexis.

Alexis took her first shot and smiled.

"Where'd you learn to do that?" Kate's jaw dropped as Alexis had made the most difficult shot on the board.

"I can tell you, but then I'd have to kill you," Alexis responded cryptically.

Lanie giggled.

"I think I should just give you my money now," Kate frowned.

"Not a good night for the Beckett-Castle bank accounts," Lanie laughed.

"You ain't kidding," Javier took a seat with Lanie. "Kevin just beat Castle again."

"Javi, you want to play Alexis? You're pretty good at darts," Kate asked.

"No thanks," Javi responded, "I much prefer to keep my money in my pocket."

"Smart man," Lanie nodded.

"You giving up, Kate?"

"Yes," Kate nodded and handed the money she'd won from Lanie to Alexis. "Well done, Bud."

"First round of coffee is on me tomorrow, Lanie," Alexis tucked the money into her dress.

"I don't drink coffee, but I will take a bear claw."

"Deal," Alexis nodded.

"Alright, you two," Kate told the two bantering pool players, "Let's call this game off before Castle loses the kids' college tuitions."

"Darn, I was this close to getting Sarah Grace's paid off," Kevin teased.

"Where'd you learn to play like that, Ryan?" Castle tossed his stick on the table in forfeit.

"My uncles," Kevin admitted. "I grew up playing in their basements."

"Well, I'm never going to get suckered into that again," Castle pulled out his wallet and handed Kevin several bills.

"The ball is about to drop," Kate glanced at her watch.

"Turn on the radio," Rick said.

Alexis leaned behind the bar and played with the dials for a moment before she got a countdown.

Kate and Lanie immediately darted over to their significant others in preparation for their midnight kisses as they waited for the final countdown to start.

"Guess that leaves you and me," Kevin saddled him next to Alexis.

"Behave," she gave him a stern warning before nodding towards her father.

"Right," Kevin nodded.

"Just consider how much you like your tongue," Alexis advised.

"Excuse me?"

"If you used it, Dad will most likely cut it out."

"Fair enough," Kevin laughed.

"Ten…nine…eight…" Lanie began to count along with the radio.

"Seven…six…five," Alexis joined her.

"Happy New Year, Alexis," Kevin stated just as she got to one. He leaned in and kissed her cheek.

Alexis's eyes fluttered before she turned to look at him, "Happy New Year, Kevin."

"It's going to be a good year," he touched her chin gently, knowing that everyone else's attention was on their more traditional kisses.

"I hope so," she nodded, putting her hand around his wrist.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Thank you everyone for the replies last time. I loved them. I hope you guys liked this as much as we did. Also, the tongue conversation is my little tribute to a truly nasty little video on YouTube with Seamus in it. Also I had to mention Piano Man. That is one of my favorite scenes in Castle History. RIP Montgomery.


	7. Chapter 6

"Hey, Castle, you got a sec?" Kevin approached his friend while he stood in front of the murder board studying a case.

"If it's about the case, please do," Rick responded. He was beyond stumped by their current case. Any new ideas were more than welcome.

"Actually it's kinda personal," Kevin admitted. "Um, can I make you some coffee?"

"Sure," Rick looked curiously towards the detective, "Everything alright? You've been a little quiet since the holidays."

"Yeah," Kevin walked into the break room and started making coffee. "How did things with Meredith fall apart?"

"She moved out and started sleeping with her director."

"But was it a gradual thing or did it just go boom?" Kevin asked.

"She always said I wasn't willing to share things about how I felt," Rick admitted. "I guess she was right, but it wasn't gradual. She was there one day and gone the next."

"I see," Kevin frowned, "What about with Gina?"

"Honestly? Gina and I were a gradual thing. It was just a lot of little things that eventually built up to a blow out."

"How did you know it was time to end the relationship?" Kevin set Castle's coffee down for him.

"Well, I think it was when she threw my laptop at me," Rick nodded. "Is everything alright, Ryan?"

"It's complicated," Kevin took a seat with his own cup of coffee.

"You and Jenny having trouble?"

"Yes," Kevin nodded. "We have been for a long time."

"I had no idea," Castle's eyes went wide in surprise.

"We just stopped trying and started going through the motions," Kevin admitted.

"Kevin, I'm sorry," Rick said. "Is there anything I can do?"

"If it was worth fighting for, I'd feel that already, wouldn't I?" Kevin asked.

"I guess so. I hung in there as long as I could with Meredith for Alexis's sake," Rick confessed. "With Gina, we had a working relationship before we were married and after we were married."

"Was Alexis happier when the two of you were together?"

"She was really young when Meredith left," Castle reminded him. "You have to remember I was raised by a single mother. I didn't want Alexis to miss out on anything by not having one."

"I don't want to hurt either Sarah Grace or Jenny, but I'm not happy," Kevin replied, "I haven't been in a long time."

"I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you that if you're not happy, you can't make anyone else happy."

"I saw a lawyer," Kevin admitted, "And I have the papers. Should I talk to Jenny about it before I give them to her, or do I just hand them to her? I don't know how to do this?"

"Wow, you're really doing this," Castle shook his head. "Okay, personally, with Gina, I would've liked a little warning before the papers arrived. With Meredith, the shacking up with someone else was my warning."

"Did it hurt knowing that she moved on so quickly?"

"Yes and no," Castle admitted. "We were stupid kids who didn't know what the hell we were doing."

"I feel like such a failure," Kevin admitted, "I fully intended to spend the rest of my life with Jenny. When I said my vows, I meant them."

"People change, things change," Castle told him.

"Part of me wishes I could go back to what we had," Kevin replied, "But there's this piece of me, a large piece that wants to move on."

Castle studied his friend for a moment and then spoke, "Is there someone else?"

"There was," Kevin swallowed hard.

"Wow," Castle blinked. "When?"

"Awhile ago," Kevin admitted, "A long while ago, but there might be a chance with her again."

"And if there is, you want to be free,' Castle surmised.

"That makes me a bad person, doesn't it?"

"No," Castle shook his head. "If it was me, and I lost Kate but I got another chance with her, I'd want to be free too."

"Thanks for saying that," Kevin replied.

"I'm sorry I didn't realize you were so unhappy," Rick replied, "I should have been a better friend."

"You're a great friend," Kevin told him. "Don't doubt it. Just be available if I want to talk about this again."

"Deal," Rick smiled. "You wanna get drunk tonight?"

"No, I need to have a discussion with Jenny."

"If you need to talk after, just pick up the phone," Rick replied.

"Castle, don't mention this to Beckett," Kevin requested, "I'd like to tell her when I'm ready."

"Secret's safe with me," Rick nodded.

"Thanks again," Kevin exited the break room.

=d=d=d=d=

Kevin took a deep breath before he entered his apartment. It was quiet. Sarah Grace was nowhere to be seen.

"Hey there, Detective," Jenny greeted him while wiping her hands on a dishtowel. He'd caught her in the middle of making dinner, "You're home early."

"Where's Sarah Grace?" Kevin asked.

"Down the hall at Mrs. Grayson's," Jenny said. "She's learning how to knit."

"We need to talk," Kevin began after taking a deep breath.

"Can we do it after dinner? It's almost ready."

"We need to do this now," Kevin insisted before taking another deep breath, "This isn't working for me anymore. I want a divorce."

"I beg your pardon," Jenny said after a moment.

"I've given our marriage my best shot, but there isn't anything here anymore. The only thing that is keeping us together is Sarah Grace. That's not fair to her or you."

"Right," Jenny said shaking her head. "What's this really about, Kevin? Did you find some other slut to spread her legs for you?"

"This is about you and me," Kevin tried to remain calm though it was difficult as he wanted to go on the attack, but for his daughter's sake he wanted to keep their relationship as civil as possible. "We're not married anymore. We're roommates."

"And whose fault is that?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" he caught the accusation in her tone.

"You know exactly what that's supposed to mean," Jenny spat. "I promise you, Kevin, if you go through with this, you will never see Sarah Grace again."

"I will not let you use Sarah Grace as a bargaining chip. She is my daughter too," he hissed.

"I will not let you do this, Kevin. We're married."

"We're not married," he scoffed, "We don't do what married people do. We don't talk. We don't share our feelings. We're never intimate. All we do is cohabitant. That's not enough for me anymore."

"Who is she, Kevin?" Jenny asked.

"Who is who?" Kevin asked.

"Who is the little whore you want more than your family?"

Kevin took a deep breath. He didn't need to come clean, but he owed her the truth. "Her name is Alexis. We had an affair several years ago, but she ended it and left New York. I guess I just went through the motions after she left, but she's moved back to New York with her children. All my old feelings returned. It's not fair to you to stay in this sham of a marriage when I'm in love with someone else."

"Please tell me it's not the Alexis I'm thinking it is."

"It's Castle's daughter," Kevin stated, "We didn't mean for it to happen, but it did."

"So what? You got drunk one night, stuck your prick in her, and suddenly you're in love? That's not love, Kevin."

"Don't belittle my feelings," Kevin said. "We weren't drunk. I was stone cold sober, and I'm in love with her, Jenny. I want a different life."

"You're delusional if think that anyone else is going to make you happy. If I couldn't do it after all the sacrifices I made, there is no hope for someone else," Jenny snarled, "You'll never be happy. You don't know what that even means."

"I know what it's not, and it's not this. I want out, Jenny. I've already filed. You'll get the papers this week."

"I don't give a damn," Jenny hollered, "I will tie this divorce up in the court systems for years. You'll never be free."

"This isn't the fifties, Jenny. I don't need your permission."

"You'll still need my signature," she replied, "And you won't get it, ever."

Kevin released a deep sigh, "You can tie this up for as long as you want, but that doesn't change things. I'm still going to be a father to Sarah Grace, but I will not be your husband. I'm going to be staying with my mother until I can find my own place."

"I will take her, and I will disappear. You will never see either of us again."

"You can certainly try," Kevin didn't flinch, "But I will use every resource I have at my disposal to keep tabs on both of you."

"You can't be everywhere, Kevin," Jenny reminded him.

"If you try to take my daughter, I will have you arrested."

"Under whose authority?" she scoffed, "I'm her mother. I have every right to take my daughter wherever I please."

"If you attempt to leave the state with her, I can have you arrested."

"You can try," she snorted.

"Jenny, I don't want to be married to you anymore. It's that simple, and it's that over," Kevin said before he left the apartment.

Jenny picked up a vase and threw it at him. It crashed against the door after Kevin shut it behind him, shattering into thousands of pieces.

=d=d=d=d=d=d=

Thank you for all the replies. I hope to see them continue. And A.K.? Tag!


	8. Chapter 7

Hi everyone- Thanks for all the replies, keep it up.

-d-d-d-d-

Javier walked across the bullpen to his desk after lunch one day and accidentally knocked a stack of files and papers off of Kevin's desk.

"Damn," he cursed as he crouched down to pick everything up as Kevin walked up behind him.

"What happened?"

"Sorry. I guess I walked too close to your desk," Javier apologized as Kevin knelt down to help him. "I got it, Bro."

"No, it's fine," Kevin said.

Javier randomly glanced at some papers he was picking up and saw the legalese on it, "You being sued or something?"

"What?" Kevin looked over at what Javier had in his hands. "Oh. Javi, you weren't supposed to see those."

"What the hell is this all about?" Javier noticed the 'Decree of Divorce' at the top of the paper.

Kevin sighed, "Come with me."

The partners went into break room and shut the door behind them before Kevin face Javier, "Remember what you said at Christmas about us needing to talk? You were right, we do. I'm in love with someone else."

"Since when?" Javier's eyes went wide in surprise.

"About eight years," Kevin repeated.

"What am I not getting?" Javier asked, "What happened eight years ago?"

"I had an affair," Kevin told him.

"You cheated on Jenny?"

"Yeah," Kevin confirmed.

"Anyone I know?" Javier asked nervously.

"You can't say anything."

"Please tell me it's not Lanie."

"No, she's all yours," Kevin shook his head.

"Then who?" Javier asked, "Is she a cop? Oh, god, please don't let it be Beckett."

"Don't be ridiculous," Kevin scoffed, "Like she's ever looked at anyone else in a serious way since Castle showed up."

"So, then who?" Javier desperately hoped that his partner hadn't gone down the path that he thought he did.

Kevin sighed, "Alexis."

"Alexis," Javier repeated, "Alexis…no, no, no, not Castle's Alexis."

"Javi," Kevin started.

"You slept with Castle's daughter?" Javier nearly shouted.

"Would you keep your voice down? Castle doesn't know."

"Castle's daughter," Javier hissed, "Have you lost your freaking mind?"

"No, I fell for her. Is that such a crime?"

"I don't know. Depending on when it started, it might have been."

"She was twenty-two," Kevin snarked. "I wouldn't have slept with her when she was a minor."

"Because sleeping with her after she became legal is so much better," Javier rolled his eyes, "I…ah...I can't..." Javier fumbled for the ability to form a complete sentence. "I can't even talk to you right now."

"Javi," Kevin started.

"I need some time with this."

"Just promise you won't say anything to Beckett or Castle."

"I can't promise that right now," Javier stormed out of the room, slamming the door loudly behind him.

Kevin leaned against the wall and sighed. He hoped he hadn't just lost his best friend.

-d-d-d-

Javier came through the door of autopsy and saw Alexis at the table.

"Hey," he said.

Alexis turned around, "Hey. If you're looking for Lanie, she's out at a crime scene."

"I came to see you," Javier responded.

"Oh, what's up?" she removed her latex gloves and made a few notes in the file she was working on before giving the man her full attention.

"I know about you and Kevin," he said.

"Oh God," Alexis breathed, while dropping her file folder on the floor.

"What the hell were you thinking?" he replied, "Were either of you even thinking?"

"I know you're Kevin's best friend, but you don't have any right to lecture me about my behavior," she bent down to retrieve the papers that had fallen.

"Jenny is also a friend," Javier said.

"Funny, I thought I was too," Alexis growled. "Or was that someone else holding me up the day of my grandma's funeral?"

"How did this even start?"

"We were just friends at first," Alexis leaned against a table for support. "It was just coffee and talking. It didn't turn sexual for awhile after that."

"Did either of you ever consider the consequences of your actions?"

"Please don't act like you're perfect, Detective. We both know you're not. I'm not going to explain or justify my actions to you. It happened, but it's over."

"For how long? Until he gets a divorce?"

"I did not ask him to divorce Jenny."

"I don't think he's gotten that message," Javier replied.

Alexis shook her head, "Javi, please don't say anything to anyone. If and when my dad finds out, I want it to be from me."

"Trust me when I say that telling Castle is the last thing on my mind."

"Did Kevin tell you anything else?"

"I didn't stick around to hear him out."

"I was pregnant when I left New York."

"You were what?" Javier's eyes went wide.

"Hunter is biologically Kevin's son."

"Does Kevin know?" he stammered out.

"Yeah, he figured it out before I came back to New York. We talked about it briefly on Christmas Eve. I suspect there will be more conversations about it in our near future."

Javier sputtered for a reply.

"Hunter doesn't know," Alexis continued.

"He thinks Chris is his dad?"

"Chris was his dad," Alexis said, "He was the only father Hunter has ever known."

"Are you planning on telling Hunter the truth?" Javier asked.

"Eventually," Alexis nodded.

"I can't believe this," Javier leaned on a gurney. "My best friend sleeps with the daughter of one of our other best friends, and she gets pregnant. She takes off and doesn't tell him for eight years."

"It's complicated," Alexis replied.

"Yeah, it's complicated. It's a freaking mess."

"It wasn't exactly how I planned my life either," Alexis stated, "We did something dumb. I won't try to rationalize it or make excuses for it, but our mistake doesn't change who he is. He's a great man."

"I wouldn't call a man who cheats on his wife great."

"How many girls have you strung along over the years, Javi?"

"This isn't about me," Javier replied, "And I never got involved with a married woman, or slept with the daughter of one of my best friends."

"No, but you're not exactly perfect either. He is your best friend. That doesn't change just because he made a mistake, a mistake that doesn't affect you in any way, shape, or form."

"Forgive me for not being the understanding partner in all of this, but I just found out. It's a bit of a shock," Javier replied.

"And if the situation was reversed? What would you expect from Kevin?"

"Don't reverse this around on me. This was Kevin's mistake. Kevin is the one that needs to fix this," Javier insisted.

"And how is he to accomplish that?" she challenged him.

"I-He," Javier sighed. "I don't know."

"You're going to need to figure it out," Alexis stated, "Yelling at me isn't going to help anyone."

"I'm sorry, Alexis. I shouldn't take my anger out on you. You're right. We're friends too."

"Don't take it out on Kevin either. He needs you right now whether he admits it or not."

Javier's phone chimed with an alert. It was a message from Kate that she needed him and Kevin out on a stake out.

"I gotta go," Javier said. "I'll see you later."

Alexis released a depressed sigh and returned to her autopsy.

-d-d-d-

It had been well over an hour of pure silence, and Kevin was about to lose his mind. He looked over at Javier and then out the window.

"We gonna talk at all?" Kevin asked.

"Nope," Javier sucked on the sucker in his mouth.

"Where'd you go before?"

"None of your business," Javier replied.

Kevin sighed, "You're not being fair."

"I don't have to right now," Javier responded, "You're the one that screwed up this time."

"I screwed up. I admit that, but how does this affect you?"

"It's about trust," Javier responded, "You didn't trust me back then, and I don't trust you now."

"I didn't not trust you, Javi. I didn't want you to have to lie for me."

"That wasn't your decision to make," Javier insisted, "You should have trusted me enough to know that I would have done right by you."

"And every time you talked to Castle, Beckett, or Jenny, how would you have felt?"

"I don't know," he replied, "But you didn't even give me a chance. I have told you nearly every detail of my life since the moment we became partners, trusting that you would keep the more personal details to yourself. I can't believe that for eight years, you kept this mammoth secret from me."

"I couldn't tell you because I knew what you'd say," Kevin said. "You would've told me to end it. You would've gone to Alexis and begged her to walk away. You would've wanted me to fix my marriage even though there was nothing left to fix."

"All of which would have been good advice," Javier responded, "Your family deserved that."

"What about me?" Kevin shot back, "What do I deserve? Don't I deserve to be happy?"

"And Alexis made you happy?"

"Yes, she did," Kevin said. "Sarah Grace isn't my only family."

"No, you're right," Javier responded, "You have a son, which you have known about for how many weeks now? Have you taken any responsibility for him? Have you told your wife or your daughter?"

"How the hell did you know about that?"

Javier looked away, cursing his mouth.

"Please tell me you didn't talk to Alexis," Kevin demanded.

"I needed to hear her side of things," Javier responded, "I needed to be sure that you didn't..."

"Didn't what?" Kevin growled, "Didn't take advantage of her? Force myself on her? Do you really think that little of me?"

"I needed to be sure you didn't break the law when you were with her," Javier said. "And let's not go into what I think about you right now."

"Son of a bitch. It's hard enough having conversations with her right now. The last thing I need is you going down there and demanding answers that are none of your damn business."

"None of my damn business," Javier snorted, "You're absolutely right. My partner is none of my damn business. I'm just supposed to put my life in his hands on a nearly daily basis."

"I'm your partner and I trust you. But you had no right to go anywhere near Alexis to discuss this."

"I really don't give a damn right now what rights I have," Javier stated.

"Well, we're gonna have to figure this out because like you said, we are partners, and we do have to put our lives in each other's hands," Kevin stated.

"Maybe we should change that," Javier stared out the windshield.

"You want the whole story? My marriage was falling apart and all of sudden there was this person I could talk to without being judged," Kevin started talking.

"You could have talked to me."

"No," Kevin shook his head. "You liked Jenny too much to be objective. Lex was different. I didn't have to put on a good face with her."

"I'm your partner first," Javier reminded him, "I would have listened without judgment."

"Like you are now?" Kevin eyed him.

"So what changed?"

"One night we were sitting at a coffee shop. It was late, and I still didn't want to go home."

"So you figured you'd just hit on Castle's daughter."

"No, that was the night I realized I needed to put some distance between us," Kevin tipped his head back against the seat, "But I couldn't help myself. I was drawn to her, and there were hints that she might feel the same. We would bump into each other in random places, and things just came to a head. We agreed not to see each other anymore, and for awhile it worked. Then I had a really bad day, and she was the only one I wanted to talk to about it. I went to see her, just to talk, but one thing led to another."

"You should have ended it after one night."

"I tried," Kevin responded, "I tried like hell, but she was like an addiction to me. I couldn't stay away."

"You were really in love with her," Javier said.

"Still am," Kevin looked out the window again.

"So what's next?" Javier asked, "You gonna keep pestering her until she caves?"

"Her husband has only been gone for a few months and the way it happened," Kevin looked at his hands.

"Yeah," Javier remembered seeing the news report on CNN. "That's gotta be tough."

"I'm getting myself free, first of all," Kevin said. "Then I'm gonna work on a friendship with her and Hunter."

"Does Jenny know this is coming?" Javier asked, "And what are you going to do about Sarah Grace?"

"I told Jenny I wanted out," Kevin admitted. "She's not taking it well. I fully expect her to go for the jugular. When she was at her mother's last weekend, I moved out. I'm staying with my mom right now."

"And your daughter?"

"I took Sarah Grace for a walk a few days ago," Kevin said. "She's being a lot more mature than I thought she'd be."

"Kids always seem to know when it's going bad between their parents," Javier replied.

"I don't want her to think her parents' marriage is something she should aspire to," Kevin said.

"Considering it's falling apart, I think it's safe to say she won't."

"I mean her father going around in a haze, and her mother pretending everything is okay."

"I didn't realize it was that bad," Javier frowned. He was now starting to kick himself for not seeing his partner's depression sooner.

"I know," Kevin nodded. "I never wanted anyone to know."

"Not even your partners?"

"Castle would've broken my neck," Kevin said.

"Or he would've told you about Hunter."

"I don't know what I would have done had I found out about Hunter sooner," Kevin frowned, "If it had been before Lex got married, I would have insisted on being a part of Hunter's life, but once she was married and happy...I don't know."

"He has your eyes," Javier said. "I looked at the picture on Kate's desk."

Kevin smiled, "Yeah, I know. I missed so much time with him."

"Can I be mad about that for you?"

"Mad at Lex?" Kevin asked.

"She knew she was pregnant when she left New York and didn't tell you."

"She says it was complicated," Kevin responded, "And I believe her."

"What are you gonna do if all she ever wants is friendship?"

"Find a way to be okay with it, I guess," Kevin sighed, "Because no matter what, I need to have her in my life."

"How bad did you get after she left?"

"I never thought about eating my gun if that's what you mean."

"Crossed my mind," Javier admitted.

"I was pretty messed up," Kevin admitted, "I drank a lot."

"You never thought about going after her?"

"I was a stubborn coward who decided if she didn't want me, then I didn't want her," Kevin shook his head. "I got pretty good at lying to myself."

"And everyone else."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "Truth? I could barely put one foot in front of the other for a long time."

"Well, I appreciate that you seemed to manage on the job," Javier responded, "Or I might not be here."

"I was determined not to screw the only two good things I had left in my life," Kevin said.

"Sarah Grace being the other one?"

"Yes," Kevin nodded.

"Oh, we have movement," Javier noticed a potential witness coming out of the cafe.

"Finally," Kevin said as he picked up a radio and spoke into it. Before they exited the car to follow the witness on foot, he asked, "We good?"

"Yeah, we're good," Javier nodded.

-d-d-d-d-

Okay so no Rylexis interaction this chapter but some serious bromance from our other favorite duo on Castle. I do love a good bromance. ;)


	9. Chapter 8

Thank you for all the replies last time. Keep it up.

=d=dd==d=d

Javier approached his desk and raised an eyebrow at his partner. Kevin was leaning back in his chair staring at nothing, but the expression on his face was stormy.

"You alright, Bro?" Javi asked.

"Not really," Kevin admitted.

"Shoot," Javier replied.

"Castle mentioned that Chris's father didn't stick around and hasn't been seen in a long time. It got me thinking. Lex has his grandkids, and it's no secret Castle has money."

"You afraid someone is going to come out of the woodwork seeking a handout?"

"I did a search," Kevin admitted. "The guy is doing life in San Quentin, no parole."

"Problem solved," Javi responded, "Then what's with the storm clouds circling overhead?"

"Guy who delivered Hunter," Kevin said. "His old man is an ex-con. Cassius Pride. Hunter mentioned an Uncle Cass a couple of times during Christmas dinner."

"And you don't like the fact that Alexis had an ex-con hanging around your son," Javier surmised.

"Is that wrong?" Kevin asked.

"No," Javier shook his head. "But Hunter's not hanging around this guy anymore."

"Yeah, but until about a month ago Lex wasn't coming back," Kevin nodded, "What if she decides to go back to New Orleans?"

"Then you will calmly explain to her why you don't want your son around an ex-con," Javier told him. "Does Castle know about this? I can't see him too happy about his grandkids being around a man who did time."

"So I do what? Tattle to Alexis's father?"

"Not unless you're ready to explain why you think you get a vote in Hunter hangs out with."

"That's not going to happen," Kevin frowned.

"At some point you two are going to come clean, right?"

"Still thinking about that," Kevin replied, "Alexis barely acknowledges my existence."

"That's not entirely true," Javi challenged him.

"No, you're right. She does acknowledge me, just barely. I'm like a fungus that she can't get rid of," Kevin frowned, "I don't come across as desperate, do I?"

"Go to the morgue," Javi chose not to respond to Kevin's question.

"What?" Kevin stared.

"Go to the morgue and talk to her."

"Pretty sure she finds the dead guys more interesting to talk to than me," Kevin replied.

"Well, then go prove her wrong," Javier steered him towards the elevator.

"This isn't going to end well."

"You won't know until you give it a try," Javier replied.

"I really don't like you right now," Kevin grumbled.

"Yeah, I know," Javier pushed his friend into the elevator and pushed the button. "Have fun."

Kevin mashed the button of the elevator while cursing his best friend out under his breath. It was only after the door was closed that he realized Javi hadn't answered his desperation question. His ego took a few hits as the elevator went down.

-d-d-d-

Alexis was sitting at her desk when Kevin walked in with two cups of coffee.

"Thanks," Alexis took the cup from him, "What's the occasion?"

"No occasion," Kevin shook his head and leaned back against the desk next to her. "It's just been a while since we had coffee."

"If you're here to talk about Hunter..." she began.

"Not exactly," Kevin shook his head. "We haven't really talked since New Year's. I want to change that."

"And you're picking now to have this heart to heart?" Alexis asked, "I have an autopsy waiting."

"Can you talk and work at the same time?" he inquired.

"Sure," Alexis nodded as she got up. She stepped around him and went to her table.

"So what's this guy's story?" Kevin pointed towards the dead guy after following her while sipping at his cup casually.

"Nothing special," Alexis commented. "Just stupid. Got drunk and got behind the wheel."

"Hope he didn't hurt anyone else in the process," he replied.

"Just the garbage bin that he ran his car into," Alexis replied, "Killed by the impact, most likely."

"Guys like that piss me off," Kevin commented. "Like I don't have enough worries about Sarah Grace. I have to worry about guys like that being on the road."

"Tell me about it. You should have seen the amount of drunk drivers the Jefferson Parish Sherriff used to pull over during Mardi Gras."

"Probably about as many as the police stop around here on New Year's Eve after the celebration in Time Square wraps up," Kevin replied.

"How was your New Year's Day?" Alexis asked.

"It was alright," he shrugged, "Sarah Grace and I played board games for most of the day. How about you?"

"It was pretty easy. No bodies, so I filled out paperwork."

"Guess the dead people of New York wanted to ease you into your first day," he replied.

"Right," Alexis nodded.

"I have a couple of questions for you," Kevin stated after clearing his throat.

"Sure," Alexis nodded.

"That guy King that you worked with in New Orleans. What do you know about him?"

Alexis put down her scalpel and turned to him, "How'd you find out?"

"Find out what?" Kevin was taken aback by her tone, "I'm just curious about your previous life."

"No," Alexis shook her head. "Kev, I know cop mode when I see it. I've been around them nearly all of my adult life. I was married to one, and I've got one for a stepmother. You're screaming it right now."

"I'm asking a legitimate question as a friend," Kevin responded, "Why are you jumping all over me about it?"

"I'm not," Alexis shook her head. "But when you do a search on a federal agent, a little alarm goes off at their headquarters."

"What are you talking about?" Kevin responded defensively.

"Did you think I wouldn't find out?" Alexis asked, "Meredith called me twenty minutes ago. She said someone was running searches on the NCIS office in New Orleans, and the searches originated with the NYPD. Who do I know that works for the NYPD that would want to search out the field office at NCIS in New Orleans? Only one person comes to mind…you."

"You knew what I was doing here the minute I walked through the doors, didn't you?"

"I had a clue," Alexis said. "You could've just asked. I would've told you what you wanted to know."

"You would have told me that Cade and Maggie's grandfather was doing life in prison?" Kevin challenged her, "And that my son spent time with a known felon?"

"Cassius is not a bad man. He made his mistakes, yes, but he also paid for them," Alexis said. "I didn't know about Chris's dad until a few years ago."

"Any other criminals that interacted with my son that I should know about?" he challenged her.

"You're overreacting," Alexis said.

"Am I?" Kevin scoffed, "Would you have mentioned any of this to me if I hadn't known to ask? It's like you're keeping secrets from me."

"That's not fair," she hissed, "I know I've made gigantic mistakes with you, but that doesn't give you license to come at me with the unprovoked attacks."

"You had him making friends with a criminal," Kevin shot back at her.

"Would you feel better if you knew that he was never alone with him?"

"How is that supposed to make me feel better?" Kevin replied.

"You know what, until you can have a civil conversation with me, maybe we shouldn't speak," she responded calmly, "You know your way out, right?"

"Alexis," Kevin protested.

"Have a nice day, Detective. Come back when you calm down."

Kevin knew it was best not to push her so he left as she'd requested.

"Jackass," Alexis hissed, "Judgmental, overprotective jackass."

-d-d-d-d-d

As Lanie passed by she handed Kevin an object wrapped in foil.

"What's this?" Kevin looked to Lanie in confusion.

"I don't know," the M.E. said. "Alexis gave this to me as she was leaving this morning. She just said to give it to you if I saw you."

"Thanks," he brought it to the car to examine later. He knew he'd become distracted if he gave into temptation now.

"Aren't you curious?" Javi asked Kevin when he returned to the scene and focused on their investigation.

"Yes, but I want to be able to pay attention to this. I'll be distracted if I look at it now."

"It wasn't ticking, was it?"

"Why do you always assume that packages that I receive are ticking?"

"You're very good at pissing off very smart women."

"So are you," Kevin reminded him.

"Will you please open it?" Javi asked him after several minutes of work at the crime scene.

"Oh fine," Kevin rolled his eyes and grabbed the package from the car and unwrapped it. It was a muffin. Kevin took it and found a piece of paper under it.

 _K-  
_ _This is our tradition. It's also my way of saying sorry for making you worry about Hunter's safety. I'm still getting used to you being around again. They're Hunter's favorite, and I hope you'll enjoy them too.  
_ _-A_

Kevin smiled upon realizing the kind of muffin she'd made. It was chocolate chip with zucchini, his favorite too.

"So?" Javier asked.

"Breakfast," Kevin smiled.

"Is there only one?"

"Sorry," Kevin apologized. "Consider it payback for the time I was on a cleanse and you kept eating donuts in front of me."

"That's just wrong," Javi glared as Kevin took a bite.

"You wouldn't like it anyways."

"Why? It's not one of those chocolate chip zucchini things, is it? I told you man, that's just a horrible combination."

"You just don't know what tastes good," Kevin laughed and rolled his eyes as Castle came over.

"Morning guys," he said. "I heard my daughter is giving you baked goods."

"Uh, yeah," Kevin responded nervously, "It's good. I didn't know she knew how to bake."

"She learned how when she and Chris got married. They had such unpredictable schedules that they knew breakfast together was never a certainty, so they created their own version of breakfast on the go. Every week they'd take turns picking a type of muffin. When they were both home, they'd bake a bunch for themselves and the kids to take."

"Wonder why she thought to send me one," Kevin decided to play dumb as he didn't want to put any ideas into Castle's head.

"Kate mentioned your problems at home and that she caught you sleeping on the break room couch three times last week. Alexis probably wanted to make sure you ate real food."

"Yeah, that must be it," Kevin nodded, "Tell her I said thanks when you see her next."

"Tell her yourself when you're in the morgue next time," Castle smiled. "I don't know what happened between you and Alexis, but you could both use a friend right now."

"Uh, yeah," Kevin stammered out, "I'll have to keep that in mind."

"Castle," Kate called. "Ian's school's on the phone. He forgot his science homework."

"Damn," Castle winced, "That was my task this morning. I'd better go take care of that. Keep what I said in mind, Ryan. You both could use a friend right now."

"If only he knew," Javi laughed once Castle was out of range.

"I miss her, Javi," Kevin admitted.

"Then go get her," Javi encouraged him, "What are you waiting for?"

"How about allowing her a chance to grieve?" Kevin offered, "Her husband did just die, and I'm still married."

"Technically," Javi responded, "But you've filed the papers a couple of days ago, right?"

"Knowing Jenny, she is gonna give me the fight of my life. We're talking the Jimmy Doyle-Sugar Ray Robinson fight."

"That's not a good comparison," Javier shook his head. "Doyle died after that fight."

"It's still valid," Kevin responded. "I don't want to put Alexis in the middle of all that."

"Isn't that for her to decide?"

"I know her," Kevin shook his head. "I know that underneath all the defensiveness and appearance of being okay, she is barely hanging on. I saw it the night Martha died, and I see it every time she lets her guard down for just a second."

"Then shouldn't you try to be there to help her through it?" Javi asked, "You know be what you couldn't be last time."

"You wanna know something really personal?"

"Go for it," Javier nodded.

"The night Martha died was the last time I really kissed her."

"That night must haunt you, Bro," Javier replied.

"I couldn't stay with her," Kevin frowned remembering. "She wouldn't go home, and I had to. I wanted to stay so damn bad."

"Do you think things might have turned out differently if you stayed with her that night?" Espo asked.

"I don't know," Kevin shook his head. "I do wonder if Jenny would've finally realized something was going on if I hadn't come home that night. None of us were at the station."

"Do you really think she didn't know back then?" Javi asked.

"If she didn't, she's done a remarkable job at playing dumb," Kevin commented. "She knows now."

"It's a tough spot that you're all in," Javi patted Kevin's back.

"And it could've been avoided if I'd just gone after Alexis when she first left New York."

"You're still kicking yourself about that, aren't you?"

"Every single day," Kevin admitted. "If you were in my position, what would you do?"

"Buddy up to her until you're both ready for more," Javi responded, "What's the harm in being friends?"

"How many of your friends have you seen naked?"

"Just you and Lanie," Javi snorted, "But only Lanie was worth a second look."

"Funny," Kevin leaned against the car. "Alexis and I tried the friend thing before. You know what that led to."

"Obviously the friend thing won't last forever, but when you're both in a better place you can take it to the next level," Javier advised his friend, "But what's the harm in spending time together until then? It's been eight years. You've both changed since then. You're going to want to figure her out a second time."

"Yeah, the only problem there is that every time I see her, I am torn between kissing her or strangling her," Kevin said. "I realize we've both changed. She's been married and has three kids. Now she's a widow who watched the building her husband was in blow sky high."

"At least give it a try," Javi responded, "What can it hurt?"

"Since when did you become some sort of love guru?" Kevin scowled at him, "You can't even tie yourself down to Lanie."

"Oh I let Lanie tie me down a few times a month," Javier smiled.

"Bad, bad images in my head," Kevin groaned.

"Look, why don't you start by thanking her for the muffin and apologizing for being a judgmental jackass?"

"I should at least thank her for the muffin," Kevin conceded.

"Yes, you should," Javier smiled.

Kevin and Javi finished their investigation at the crime scene and returned to the precinct to start their search for their killer. They all got caught up in the case that it was a few days before Kevin even remembered her gesture, and that was when she stepped into the coffee shop while he was reading his paper. He'd just finished an article and turned the page of his newspaper while he looked around the coffee shop he was sitting in and spotted a familiar head of hair at the counter.

He felt his heart speed up at the mere sight of Alexis even though they hadn't spoken directly since their argument and her peace offered muffin.

He'd been feeling pretty good since his discussion with Jenny about the divorce, aside from the conversation he'd had with his daughter explaining that he was moving out and divorcing her mother. She'd taken the news relatively well. In fact his ten-year-old had taken it better than her mother had.

Kevin felt relatively confident that their spat was over, so he approached the red head. "Hey, Alexis, fancy meeting you here."

He caught her in the middle of unclipping her hair. It had just begun to tumble around her shoulders when she turned to face him, "Hi."

He was momentarily stunned into silence as he recalled times when her hair had fallen around them, creating a curtain and giving them privacy as they kissed. He shook himself out of it and smiled, "Haven't seen you since…never mind. How has autopsy been treating you?"

"Not bad. You guys keeping busy?"

"It's never dull in Homicide," Kevin replied, "Can I buy you a cup of coffee?"

"Here you go," one of the people behind the counter handed Alexis a paper cup.

"Thanks anyway," Alexis nodded.

"How about a muffin then?" he offered, "Maybe a chocolate chip zucchini muffin?"

"Uh, no. Thank you," Alexis looked down at the counter. She obviously hadn't put together his reference of the muffin she'd sent him. Her mind was elsewhere.

"Everything alright?" he noticed the slight slump in her posture.

"Bad day," she replied as she suddenly spilled coffee on her shoes, "And it just keeps piling on."

"Here," Kevin grabbed some napkins and bent down at the same time Alexis did. They bumped heads.

"Ow," Alexis groaned.

"Sorry," he touched her head lightly.

"It's okay. I'm fine. Hard head like my dad," Alexis managed to get the coffee sopped up off her shoes before it could soak through and leave a stain.

"I have a table, if you want to join me," he motioned towards where his coffee and paper awaited him.

"I should get back," Alexis said.

Realizing she was brushing him off, he gave a solemn nod and retreated without another word. He thought that they would have moved beyond their spat from a few weeks earlier, but apparently he was wrong.

Alexis got two steps towards the door before she turned around and walked over to his table, "I'm being a bitch, and I'm sorry."

"You want to talk about it?" Kevin nodded to the empty chair.

Alexis sat down, "It's just the date. It's getting to me."

"You're going on a date?" he gulped nervously.

"No. Today's date. It's the tenth."

"Okay," he responded slowly, not understanding what the point was she was trying to make.

"February tenth," Alexis prodded.

"Friday, February tenth," Kevin nodded as he checked his watch.

Alexis laughed, "It's nice to know that there are times when you can be a typical guy."

"I don't follow," he frowned.

"What's ten plus four?"

"Fourteen," he responded, "Is this some sort of math quiz that I didn't study for?"

"God, you are so clueless," she rolled her eyes, "February fourteenth, otherwise known as Valentine's Day."

"Oh," Kevin nodded. "Right. I am an idiot."

"Hunter and Cade just told me this morning that we need to get Valentine's Day cards for their classes to exchange next week, and it just hit me that I'll be without a Valentine this year...Chris always made a big deal out of Valentine's Day."

Kevin nodded again, "First one's going to be the hardest. Did you guys make plans in advance?"

"Chris made plans. It was simply understood that I would need to be available that day," she explained.

"Liked to surprise you," Kevin surmised. "Sounds like a good guy."

"Great guy," Alexis nodded, "It's slowly starting to sink in that he's gone."

"Yeah, it always takes a while for the news to sink in when something happens that you aren't prepared for," Kevin nodded.

"I'm sorry, I'm just not in a good head space right now," she replied, "About that fight a few weeks ago…."

"Water under the bridge," he assured her.

"Thanks," she smiled weakly.

"I get it, Lex. Believe me," Kevin let her off the hook.

"I should go," Alexis gathered her belongings, "I'll see you around."

"Wait," Kevin laid a hand on her arm. "Stay and talk. It'll help."

"I don't want to lay all my problems in your lap," she replied, "That's not fair to you."

"It wasn't fair to you either a lot of the time," Kevin reminded her. "But you were always willing to listen to me."

"It's a bit more complicated now," she frowned, "I appreciate the offer, but maybe another time."

"You still owe me a dinner," he reminded her.

"Yeah, I do," she nodded, "Rain check?"

"I think you're out of rain checks, Doctor," he replied, "How about we nail down an actual date? I'm off this Tuesday. Does that work for you?"

"I think that's a little too close to a date for my comfort," Alexis said.

"Why, what's happening Tuesday?" he asked.

"Such a guy," she gave an amused laugh, "Tuesday, February fourteenth, otherwise known as Valentine's Day."

"Oh, right," he frowned. He'd already forgotten.

"You don't having plans already?"

"I doubt spending Valentine's Day with my soon to be ex-wife is a good idea."

"Soon to be?" she gave him a startled look.

"I told Jenny I was filing. I started the proceedings."

"Oh," she was taken aback, "I had no idea."

"Lex? I told you I was doing this at Christmas."

"You told me you had planned for it," she replied, "In my defense, you said that often when we were together eight years ago. I didn't know this was nearly a done deal. You didn't mention anything about it to me a few weeks ago."

"I deserve that," Kevin conceded. "A few weeks ago when we had spoke I hadn't talked to Jenny yet. I didn't want anything out there until I had a chance to talk to her and Sarah Grace. I owed them that much. As far as 'done deals' go, those aren't the words I'd use. It's more like trying to run in quicksand."

"Jenny's giving you a fight," Alexis surmised.

"To put it mildly," Kevin told her.

"I'm not surprised," she stared at her coffee cup.

"You want another one?" he asked.

"No," she shook her head.

"Have dinner with me," Kevin reached for her hand, "How about a week from Tuesday? It can be sort of an anti-Valentine's Day dinner."

"That actually sounds like fun. You know what February 21st is right?"

"No, what?"

"Fat Tuesday," Alexis smiled. "We'll have Hurricanes. Don't forget your beads."

"I'll see if I can find some," he gave a wide smile.

"Have a nice night, Kevin," Alexis smiled as she stood up. She bent down to kiss his cheek before leaving the coffee shop.

Kevin made a mental note to pick up a Valentine's trinket for his daughter. Perhaps she could be his Valentine this year.

He also needed to find some beads as Alexis suggested.

-d-d-

"Hey, Ryan," a uniform walked over to him. "This was left at the desk for you."

"Thanks," Kevin nodded as he took the box and began opening it.

"Open it slowly, Partner," Javier looked nervously at the box, "If it's from Jenny it could be ticking."

"Don't be ridiculous," Kate smacked his shoulder when she approached.

Kevin laughed as he pulled out a string of purple beads.

"What the-" Javier stared. "You going to some weird party?"

"It's a Mardi Gras thing, Espo," Kate replied, "You'd know if you've ever been."

Kevin smiled as he turned the box over and found a note.

 _K-  
_ _Purple's for justice. Seemed appropriate. First Hurricane's on me tonight.  
_ _-A_

"Secret admirer, Ryan?" Javier looked to his partner curiously. Kevin hadn't filled him in on his evening's plans.

"Just some plans for tonight," Kevin smiled as he put the note in his pocket and the beads in his drawer for later. "What's up, Beckett?"

"Caught a case," she replied, "Let's go."

"You're really not gonna tell me who the beads were from?" Javier followed Kevin and Beckett.

"No, I'm really not," Kevin smiled.

"Since when do we have secrets?" Espo asked.

"Since I know you can't keep one," Kevin told him.

"Since when have I not been able to keep secrets?" Javi challenged him.

"Beckett, how many people knew you were pregnant with Jo before Castle did?"

"Everyone," Kate glared at the detective, "I had to tell Castle while we were at a crime scene before he found out from the uniform that was daring to approach to offer his congratulations."

"That was an accident," Javier said.

"Javi, the cleaning crew knew about Jo before Castle."

"Fine, don't tell me," Javi huffed, "I'm a detective. I'll figure it out for myself."

Kevin laughed as leaned against the back of the elevator. Beckett shot her friend a knowing look before turning to Javier, "Good luck with that. You still don't know why Lanie turned you down for Valentine's Day."

"I'll figure that out too," he responded confidently.

"No, you won't," Kevin and Kate said in unison before exchanging a look.

"Whatever, Man," Javier glared at his partner.

-d-d-d-

"C'mon, just give me a hint," Javier whined.

"No," Kate shook her head.

"I know you know," Javier said.

"Yeah, I do," Kate gave a confident smile, "But it's none of your business or mine for that matter."

"It's not Jenny, is it?" Javi responded with dread, "Are they getting back together?"

"Would you get back together with a woman who sent you dead flowers on Valentine's Day? Wait, don't answer that. I don't want to know."

"That was pretty low of Jenny," Javier frowned, "I get her not being happy with the divorce, but that was just..."

"Creepy," Kate finished for him.

"I was going to go with psychotic," Javier amended.

"That too," Kate agreed.

"Anyway, back to Kevin's date," Javier said.

"Okay, Javi, I admit it. I am attracted to you," Kate smiled.

"What? Whoa, Beckett," Javier backed away.

"But for both our sakes, we can never act on it."

"Beck- Hi, Castle," Javier said when he heard repressed laughter from behind.

"And why are you hitting on my wife?" Castle felt the need to prolong the detective's discomfort.

"I'm not," Javier protested. "She knows something about Kevin's date for tonight, and she won't tell me."

"Why are you worried about Kevin's love life? Shouldn't you be trying to fix your own?"

"Fix my own?" Javier repeated, "My love life is just fine, thank you very much."

"Not according to Lanie," Castle casually perused a magazine.

Kate snorted before holding up a file folder to cover her laughter.

Castle looked at his wife, "Can I buy you lunch, Detective?"

"Absolutely," she smiled.

"Hey, wait," Javier protested. "Beckett, I know you know."

"Know what?" Kate said with an innocent smile.

"Oh, come on," Javier threw up his hands.

"See you in an hour, Javi," Kate waved as the doors closed.

Javier looked around for Kevin and saw him in the break room on the phone. Just as he walked towards it, Gates came out of her office.

"Esposito, I need you to go down to 1PP to pick up some files."

"What?" Javier turned towards his captain abruptly, "Can't you get a uniform to do it?"

"No. These files are important, and I don't want a random uniform doing it. I want you to do it."

Javier released a dejected sigh and moped towards the elevator like a child just scolded for having his hand in the cookie jar.

-d-d-d-

"With any luck, I can be out of here by five. Does that work for you?" Kevin asked.

" _Yeah, I'll meet you out front of the morgue."_

"I'll be there," he vowed.

" _Lanie says that you've been torturing Javi by keeping from him that we're going out tonight,"_ Alexis snorted, _"And why can't he know?"_

"Because then Castle might find out," Kevin replied, "And we don't want that, do we?"

" _No, good point,"_ Alexis agreed.

"Kate said she knows, but she's just messing with Javi," Kevin admitted, "And it's driving him insane."

" _Speaking of messing with Javi, he still doesn't realize that the reason Lanie turned him down is because he forgot he made plans with her to go out on Valentine's Day and then asked her again, does he?"_

"Not a clue," Kevin chuckled.

" _Poor Javi,"_ Alexis laughed.

"He deserves it," Kevin replied.

" _Show some sympathy,"_ Alexis chided. _"He is your partner."_

"Today he's not my partner. Today he's a giant pain in the ass."

" _Did you get the package I sent you?"_ she asked.

"What do you think set Javi off?" Kevin smiled.

" _Ah,"_ it suddenly clicked for Alexis, _"I hadn't thought about that. Sorry."_

"I'm actually kind of enjoying it," Kevin admitted.

" _Glad they're of some amusement,"_ she replied.

"Are you expecting me to wear them tonight?"

" _No,"_ Alexis smiled. _"I just wanted to do something nice for you."_

"Just having dinner with me tonight is sufficient."

" _So, where are we going?"_

"Carmine's okay with you?"

" _I do like a good Italian meal,"_ Alexis smiled.

"I'd better go," he glanced towards the window of the break room. Gates was giving him a stern look, and he didn't want a lecture about conducting personal business during work hours.

" _Yeah, me too,"_ Alexis heard the door open. Lanie was back.

"See you tonight," he replied.

" _Looking forward to it,"_ she smiled.

"Bye," Kevin smiled.

" _Bye."_

Kevin disconnected and then looked up to see Gates again. He suddenly realized he needed something from his boss.

Walking across the bullpen he knocked on her door, "Sir? Can I have minute?"

"Sure, Ryan, what can I do for you?" she looked up from the file she'd just started reading.

"I need a change of marital status form. Do you have any, or should I call personnel?"

Gates looked startled by the question. "Is everything alright, Detective?"

"I'm getting a divorce," Kevin admitted. "I guess I need a change of address and change of beneficiary form, too."

"I can get my hands on the forms for you," Gates replied, "And if you need someone to talk to…"

"I know Psych is available," Kevin responded, "But I'm fine."

"Yes, you are," Gates realized. "I'll get those forms to you by the end of the day."

"Thank you," Kevin nodded before he left the office.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis studied the menu in front of her for a moment before she realized she was being stared at. She looked up and met Kevin's eyes for a split second before he looked back at his menu. She fought a smile as she returned her attention to her menu.

A second glance revealed that he was looked at her again.

"Stop that," she scolded him.

"Sorry," he apologized not even trying to deny the staring.

"Do I have something in my hair?"

"No, you look beautiful," he assured her, "You always do."

"Okay, then why the staring? You've seen me before, right?"

"It was a long time without," he told her. "When I allowed myself to miss you, I would find myself picking out certain details that I remembered of you, and then pick it apart until I remembered every little detail."

Alexis closed her menu and leaned on the table, "The image I kept in my head of you was the Fourth of July party. You were laughing hysterically, and Sarah Grace dumping small handfuls of sand on you."

"I still have those pictures we took," he admitted while pulling out his phone to show them to her and then more current photos of his daughter.

Alexis smiled, "God, she was so tiny."

"Yeah, some days it's hard to believe the little girl in that picture is the same one I'm raising now," he smiled proudly.

"Should I ask what image of me you kept in your head?" Alexis said, handing the phone back.

"Just the important ones," he gave her a knowing wink.

Alexis bit her lip, "I have to ask you. New Year's Eve when you were playing pool with my dad, did you-were you thinking about-"

"When I taught you to play pool?" Kevin finished.

"Yeah," she nodded.

"Couldn't stop," he added, "Almost blew my concentration."

"Oh thank God, it wasn't just me."

"Never for a minute," he stated. He was about to reach for her hand when the server arrived to take their order.

Considering Carmine's was family style, they skipped an appetizer and just decided to share their entrees. Kevin got chicken, and Alexis ordered eggplant.

"How bad did it get with Jenny?" Alexis asked quietly.

"It wasn't all bad," he sighed, "After you left I was in a daze for awhile. Around Sarah Grace, I was fine, but in everything else, I was on autopilot."

"Surely Jenny must have noticed something wasn't right," Alexis replied.

"If she did, she didn't acknowledge it. She's always been a good actress."

"Not as good as you think," Alexis commented. "My grandmother saw right through her."

"Yeah, well, I wish your grandmother had set me straight," he replied, "Would have saved us both a lot of time and heart ache."

"Jo sleeps in my old room now. I went in there the other day to get a few boxes out of the back of my closet," Alexis started. "I found that old T-shirt you wore the weekend we had the loft to ourselves."

"That was one of my favorite weekends," he smiled.

"I could never find it after that weekend. If you wanted it back, I have it now."

"It's yours," he told her.

"Things happened how they were supposed to," Alexis swallowed hard, "It was one of the hardest things I had to do in leaving you, but I can't regret how I lived my life after you. I'm sorry if this hurts, but I made a good life for myself with Chris...until the explosion."

This time Kevin didn't hesitate in taking her hand, partly to offer comfort and partly to reassure himself that she was real. If she'd been closer to that building, he'd have been standing next to Castle and Beckett at her funeral. Just the thought made him sick and he squeezed her hand lightly.

"Kevin?"

"It does hurt but, it would've hurt more if you'd died too."

"I thought about you," Alexis admitted, "Nearly every day, nearly every time I looked into Hunter's eyes. Somehow Chris found a way to be okay with it."

"I would love to hate him," Kevin confessed. "I want to hate him, you have no idea how much, but I can't. I can't hate a man who made you happy."

"He reminded me a little of you," she replied, "He had the same fierce determination to find justice."

"Castle said he was from Alabama?" Kevin recalled a detail from Castle's initial complaint of Alexis's marriage.

"Yes. His accent," Alexis shook her head in amusement. "It was thick and in the beginning there were times I couldn't understand what he was saying."

"You've got a bit of an accent too," Kevin smiled.

"I do not," she protested.

"It's a bit north meets south," he replied.

"Oh God, really?" Alexis blushed.

"I like it," Kevin told her.

"So what kind of man are you these days, Kevin Ryan?" she squeezed his hand.

"Just trying to do right by the city and my family," Kevin said. "All of my family."

"How are things with you and Javi? Still good?"

"We've had a few rough patches recently," he admitted.

"Yeah I stumbled into the middle of one, didn't I?" she frowned.

"Don't," Kevin shook his head. "It's on me. I never told him back then and he's pissed."

"I never wanted to mess up things between the two of you," she felt tears well in her eyes.

"I was selfish back then," he admitted, "I wanted to keep you all to myself, and I didn't want to share any part of what we had with anyone. To him it felt like I didn't trust him."

"Was it that you wanted to keep me to yourself or were you afraid of what Javi might do with the information?"

"He wouldn't have gone to your dad, if that's what you mean," Kevin said.

"I know, but he might have come to me and asked me to end it."

"If you knew he'd found out, what would you have done?" he asked curiously. "What would you have done if he came to you and told you to end it?"

"I tried to end it once or twice before I left New York," Alexis reminded him. "I couldn't do it. Javi knowing would've been dangerous. You two don't always think before you start arguing. You both have tempers. The simplest disagreement between you two and half the precinct would've found out. So, I think I would've ended it."

"Guess it was best he didn't find out," Kevin replied.

"If he'd told you to end it, reminded you that you were married, or threatened to tell my dad, what would you have done?"

"I don't know," Kevin glanced towards his left hand where the ring had finally been removed. He thought he'd feel strange about not wearing it, but it hadn't. It felt like a weight had been lifted. "I was scared to end my marriage, which is maybe why it's only now that I've found the courage, but maybe it would have been for the best if he had found out. It would have forced me to make the tough decision."

"And if my dad had been the one to find out about us?"

"I think I still would have made the tough decision, but with a serious limp," he replied.

Alexis giggled, "Would it make you feel better to know that he wasn't crazy about Christopher at first?"

"That had nothing to do with Chris as a person and everything to do with where he lived."

"It might have had more to do with how no man was ever good enough for his only daughter," Alexis replied. "Lord, I can only imagine how hard it's going to be for poor Jo."

"Yeah Sarah Grace's future boyfriends aren't in for an easy time either," Kevin commented.

"Pretty sure that Maggie's going to have it rough too," Alexis snickered, "Her brothers are quite protective of her."

"And she has her grandpa and Uncle Javi," Kevin smiled.

"Javi should have some kids of his own."

"That's a scary thought all on its own," Kevin clutched at his chest, "Little Espos running around."

Alexis laughed again, "He'd be a great dad, stop it."

"He's a good uncle. I'll give you that," Kevin replied. "He's always come through for Sarah Grace."

"How's she taking everything?"

"She puts on a brave face for us," Kevin's eyes cast to the table, "I didn't want to put her through something like this, but what was the alternative? Two parents that rarely interacted with each other."

Alexis put her other hand over his, "I'm sorry. It's not easy to see your kids in pain, I know."

"She's a smart girl," Kevin replied, "I think she knew it was coming. With us not spending Christmas Eve together or New Year's Eve…she didn't seem surprised, she didn't even cry."

Alexis moved her hand on the side of his face, "She may seem like she's okay, but I promise you, she's not. Make her talk to you."

"Yeah, I'm trying," Kevin stated.

"How often do you get to see her?" Alexis asked.

"Every chance I get. It's not easy," Kevin admitted.

"Jenny?"

"Yeah," he confirmed, "She's making it as difficult as she can, but Sarah Grace seems to understand that it's not my choice to not be around as much as I want to."

"You're still a good man, Charlie Brown," Alexis smiled.

"Thank you, Lucy," he returned her smile.

"I missed that," Alexis admitted.

"Me too."

"So where do we go from here?" Alexis asked.

"We started as friends. I'd like to get back to that again."

"Is that all?" she bit her lip.

"For now," he nodded, "We're both trying to pick up the pieces of our lives. It's going to be awhile before we can even try to see if they fit together."

"You're still in there," she realized. "The decent guy I had a huge crush on at fifteen is still in there. I think I forgot for a while."

"I think I forgot he was there too," he admitted. "I was hard on myself…after you left so abruptly."

"Kevin, I…" she began.

"No," he halted her, "Let's save that for another time."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "No expectations tonight, remember?"

Dinner came and went, and they continued to banter back and forth. In some ways, it felt like years apart had never occurred, but in others it felt like the time apart had been much longer.

Kevin was far too hard on himself, taking all the blame for their separation. She'd tried several times to set him straight, but every time he stopped her, claiming it wasn't the time.

After dinner, when he got her a cab, they faced each other and she wasn't sure what to do for a moment and then she kissed his cheek.

"This was fun," she tugged lightly at his tie, "Maybe we can do it again."

"Yes," Kevin said. "I would like that."

"Maybe in a couple of weeks," she shifted nervously from one foot to the other.

"Not next week?" he asked hopefully.

"No," she shook her head, "My dad has lined up showings with a realtor. He claims to have found the perfect place for me and the kids."

"Still trying to make sure you stay close?"

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "You know my dad."

"Yes, I do," Kevin nodded.

"Well, whenever you do find a place, let me know," Kevin replied, "I'll help you move."

"I appreciate the offer, thanks," Alexis smiled.

"Nite, Lex," he brought her hand to his lips.

"Nite," her eyes were on her hand and his lips.

Kevin helped her into the cab and then watched it drive away.

Alexis looked out the back window of the cab and watched Kevin for a moment before she turned around and settled against the seat. God, she hadn't wanted to say goodnight. What was wrong with her?

-d-d-d-d-

So we went a little long on this one. I hope everyone liked it.


	10. Chapter 9

I got some really great replies last time. I hope to say that about this chapter too. GoodForm you rock as always.

=d=d=d=d=

Espo and Rick grumbled each time they carried a new piece of heavy furniture into the apartment. Alexis would navigate them in the right direction, which solicited more grumbling

"What do you think Kate?" Alexis asked her step-mother while motioning around her new apartment.

"I like it," Kate took in the surroundings, "I can definitely see why your father liked it so much. It's his style."

"Where does this go?" Espo held up his end of the overstuffed chair he and Rick were carrying.

"Office," Alexis pointed to a door off the living room.

"Could this furniture be any heavier," Espo grumbled.

"I'm buying you a beer, remember," Alexis promised.

"I'm going to need a new back," Espo said.

"I'm only buying beer," Alexis laughed.

"It had better be more than one."

"Can I get a hernia?" Rick asked as he backed into Alexis's office.

"Sure," Kate snorted. "But rent one first, make sure you like it."

"What a bunch of babies," Alexis rolled her eyes before returning to the living room to unpack a box of books onto a built in shelf.

She looked over her shoulder when Kevin walked in backwards holding one end of her dining room table while the doorman held the other.

"Lanie, you mind directing them?" Alexis asked.

"Sure," Lanie nodded, "Follow me, boys."

Alexis caught Kevin's eye as he passed by and smiled at him before she returned to her bookshelf loading.

"Why can't you guys just move the furniture without all the lip like Ryan?" Beckett asked her husband and the detective while they grumbled on their way to the door.

"Ryan's used to being bossed around by women," Espo said. "Have you met his sisters?"

"Grow a pair, Espo," Kate teased him.

"Funny," Espo frowned at him.

"Stop stalling," Alexis pointed to the door. "My dining room chairs aren't going to walk up here themselves."

"Keep talking like that, Little Lady, and they won't walk up here at all," Javi challenged her.

Alexis gave him the Bambi eyes, and Javier groaned.

"Crap, that's not fair," Javi did his best to avoid looking at her when he and Castle made their way back to the door.

"Works every time," Kate remarked.

"Christopher cursed the day Maggie learned that trick," Alexis giggled.

"I bet," Kate laughed while unloading her own box of books.

"The things I managed to get Dad to let me do by using that look," Alexis smiled. "I don't know if I got it from my mom or Gram."

"Jo does the exact same thing," Kate replied, "And it works every time."

"Thanks, Gram," Alexis tapped a picture of Martha.

The kids ran in and out of the living room depending on what was being brought in from the moving van.

"Hey, Mags, come here," Alexis motioned her daughter over after she nearly got trampled during the latest load.

Maggie came darting over.

"What did I say about running around the apartment today?" she knelt before her.

"You said I have to be on my bestest behavior so that I don't get hurt," Maggie recited her mother's orders to the best of her ability.

"Very good," Alexis smiled, "Then why are you running all over the apartment."

"Mr. Beary is missing," Maggie pouted.

"Oh, I see," Alexis nodded as she knelt down. "Do you remember where you last saw him?"

Maggie shook his head.

"Boys? Did you take Mr. Beary and hide him?" Alexis called out.

"No," Cade and Hunter shook their heads convincingly. Hunter added, "He got packed this morning in the box marked 'Maggie's Toys'."

"Do you know where the box is?"

"I carried it in," Kate said. "It's in Maggie's room."

"Can you find the box on your own, or do you want Hunter to help you?" Alexis asked her youngest.

"I do it myself," Maggie darted off.

Alexis smiled after her daughter and got up to look around.

"You okay?" Kate asked.

"I don't know," Alexis shook her head. "I lived in an apartment in New Orleans for two years, but this feels different."

"First place without Chris in quite awhile," Kate brought an arm around Alexis's shoulders.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "Do you remember the first time you and Dad visited? You pulled a gun on Chris because you didn't expect him to just barge into the apartment."

"A little heads up would have been nice," Kate laughed.

"You pulled a gun on him?" Kevin caught the tail end of the conversation.

"And Chris thought it was hysterical," Alexis chuckled, "He said it was a hell of a way to be welcomed into the family."

"It took the pressure off of Alexis because when we visited she was six months pregnant and hadn't told us yet," Kate reminded her.

Kevin didn't know if he should laugh at the story or be furious with the thought of her having lived with someone else. He withheld any further comment and went down to the truck for the next load.

Alexis turned from Kate, her eyes turned sad, and went back to shelving her books. Just as Espo, her dad, and Kevin came back in with dining room chairs, Maggie came downstairs sobbing.

Alexis turned to Maggie, "Baby, what's the matter?"

"Ouchie," she held up her cut finger, shaking as she was near hysterics.

"Oh my gosh," Alexis said. "How did you do that?"

"She cut her finger on a staple," Hunter filled in.

"Oh my goodness," Alexis replied, "Let's get you a band-aid, Princess."

"I've got one in my purse," Kate said as she went into the kitchen knowing that all first aid supplies that Alexis owned were likely still in a box that had yet to be unpacked.

Alexis smiled her thanks at Kate and reached for Maggie's hand to take a better look at the cut.

She was surprised when Maggie jerked away.

"What's the matter, Baby?" Alexis asked, "I'm trying to fix your boo-boo."

"No," Maggie shook her head. "Don't want you."

"What?" Alexis was stunned by her daughter's apparent rejection.

"Dad always kissed the boo-boo before putting on the band-aid," Hunter reminded his mother.

"Oh," Alexis said quietly.

Maggie sniffled, "I w-want D-d-daddy."

Alexis had never felt so helpless in all her life. She had a heartbroken look on her face as Maggie continued to sob. She completely lost it.

Alexis sank to her knees with sobs of her own. Rick came forward at once, and Alexis shot back up. She ran into her room and the door was heard locking.

"Come here, Maggie," Rick lifted Maggie up onto the counter to tend to her injury.

Kate went to provide comfort to her stepdaughter.

"Alexis, can I come in?" she called quietly.

Alexis couldn't even summon an answer.

"Alexis," Kate knocked softly.

Kevin stood near the kitchen counter, wanting to be the one to comfort Alexis.

"Kev?" Javier put his hand on the other man's shoulder.

"Guys, we should get going," Lanie told the boys, "The truck's unloaded, right?"

"Just brought up the last couple of boxes," Javi nodded.

"Then let's go," Lanie said quietly.

Kevin shot another look at the bedroom door where Kate was talking quietly.

"Kev," Javi prodded him, "You can't be the one to comfort her right now."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded, "I know."

"Come on," Javier said.

Lanie told Kate that the trio were taking off and to have Alexis call if she needed someone to talk.

Lanie, Javier, and Kevin walked to the elevator. Once they were on, Javier looked at Kevin, "You okay?"

"Uh," Kevin's eyes went to Lanie, "Fine."

"She knows," Javier told him.

"Of course she does," Kevin groaned.

"Secret's safe with me, Kevin," Lanie said, "Though your body might be in danger when Castle finds out you used to sleep with his daughter."

"Yeah, I know," he nodded.

"And that you want to start sleeping with her again," Javier added.

"Not the time, Javi," Kevin glared at him.

"You want her back?" Lanie asked in surprise.

"Didn't get to that part, Javi?"

"Not in so many words," Javi shrugged.

"You want to get drunk?" Lanie asked Kevin.

"No, thanks though," Kevin leaned back against the wall. "Am I crazy?"

"Probably," Lanie replied, "But isn't that what being in love is?"

Kevin smiled, "Thanks, Lanie."

"For what?"

"For not coming down on me for being with Lex eight years ago or for wanting to be with her again."

"No point in me getting upset. It happened. It was a choice that was made by two consenting adults," Lanie replied, "As far as now goes; I got no problems with it. Just give her the time that she needs to heal because today has made it quite obvious that she's not yet."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"But," Lanie came to stand in front of Kevin just before the doors opened, "If you hurt her, I will perform a pre-mortem autopsy on you."

"I'll keep that in mind," he laughed.

"Good," Lanie smiled. "Let's go eat."

"You guys go on," Kevin replied, "I should be getting back to my mom's."

"You sure?" Javier asked.

"Go, I'm fine," Kevin nodded.

"Let's go, Javi. Ply me with liquor, and maybe I'll let you get lucky."

"You're on," Javi followed her like a puppy.

Kevin smiled as his friends walked away and watched Lanie took Javi's hand after a few moments.

Instead of getting into his car, he decided he needed to take a walk.

He didn't know how long he walked, but it gave him some time to think.

Watching Alexis crumble earlier was like having a knife stabbed into his heart. Not being allowed to comfort her was like having the knife twisted.

He missed her. There was no getting around it; he just did. It wasn't in just a sexual way. He missed doing simple things like holding her hand or talking to her over dinner.

Before he knew it, he was right outside Alexis's favorite ice cream shop. It appeared to be a quiet evening in what was usually a busy shop.

He walked in after a moment of thought and ordered a pint of Alexis's favorite ice cream.

Kevin knocked on the door to Alexis's apartment and waited for a response.

" _Who's there?"_

"Uh, Ryan," he responded hesitantly while rocking back on his heels. He knew this was a bad idea.

Alexis unlocked the door and opened it for him, "Hey. What's up?"

"I was walking past that ice cream parlor that you liked back in the day, and then I remembered how much ice cream used to cheer you up," Kevin held out a paper bag for her. There was nervousness in his voice that almost had Alexis smiling.

"I hope you bought enough for two," Alexis tilted her head in invitation. "Come in."

"It's quiet," was the first thing Kevin realized, "Kids in bed already?"

"No, my dad and Kate took them home. They thought I could use some alone time," Alexis admitted. "Counter or couch?"

"Counter," he replied, "There are hopefully a couple of spoons in the bag. I didn't know if you would have unpacked the silverware yet."

"Lanie unpacked my silverware, dishes, and glasses before she left."

"She's certainly efficient," Kevin replied.

"Efficiency helps when you're a doctor," Alexis grabbed a couple of spoons and then a glass of water. "You still like water after having something sweet?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "Can't believe you remember something like that."

Alexis smiled, "The things you hold onto, right?"

"Right," he dug into the tub, not finding it the least bit odd that they were sharing the same pint of ice cream.

"How scary was I earlier?" Alexis asked after a moment.

"About an eight."

"God, I can't even imagine how badly I scared Maggie and the boys," Alexis stared at the counter for a beat before looking at Kevin. "How bad did I scare you?"

"You didn't exactly scare me," he replied, "I wished I could help you in some way."

"Those tricky boundaries, right?" Alexis smiled ruefully.

"You want to talk?" he asked.

"I miss him," Alexis shook her head. "It's better being here in New York than it was in New Orleans because we never lived here together. There are still times when I wake up and think he's going to be making waffles with Maggie or getting ready to take the boys fishing."

"And he was the boo-boo fixer," Kevin concluded, "I'm that for Sarah Grace."

"Yeah," her eyes welled with tears.

"I know it's not the same, but when it started to go wrong, I'd miss the way things used to be with Jenny," Kevin confessed.

"I wouldn't expect anything less from you," Alexis told him.

"You miss the little things," he added, "Things that you didn't think you'd miss or feel silly for missing."

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "When I first left, I'd miss listening to you sing in the shower in the morning."

"What, the off key assault on your senses?"

"Stop, you have a great voice," Alexis told him.

"You were a bit biased," he chuckled.

"Maybe," she nodded. "You always sounded happy, so it put me in a good mood."

"Want me to sing for you now?"

"Depends. You happy?"

"Not really," he shook his head, "It's been awhile since I've been truly happy."

"I'm sorry for that," Alexis told him.

"It's not all your fault," he replied.

"That's good to know," Alexis smiled a little. "I missed this, too."

"Ice cream?" he raised a brow, "Didn't they have parlors in New Orleans?"

"No, just sitting with you and talking," Alexis clarified.

"I missed it too."

"Do you remember the first time we snuck into my Gram's and had dinner at the counter together?" Alexis smiled.

"Yeah," he gave her a shy smile.

"It was so windy out, I thought for sure we were going to lose power and be stuck there all night," Alexis bit her lip and smiled.

"And it eventually did," he replied, "It was a good thing your Gram had those candles."

"It was the first time we just fell asleep together," Alexis remembered. "Before everything else, just you and me on the living room floor."

"That was a very uncomfortable floor," he winced with the memory.

"I don't know," she mused, "It was pretty comfortable from my end."

"Yeah, you used me as your pillow all night," he replied.

"You had your arm around me when we woke up the next morning," Alexis remembered softly.

"It was the only way I could get you to stop moving," he chuckled, "You like to toss and turn in your sleep."

"Kev, was I crazy, or did you try to kiss me that morning?"

"You're not crazy," he shook his head, "I'm glad we waited. I liked how our first kiss happened."

"Yeah, me too," Alexis nodded.

"And everything after," he added with a slight blush.

"Yeah, I liked that too," she added her own blush to the conversation.

"Until the panicked morning after," he teased.

"Oh God," Alexis put her hand on her forehead.

"You realize that if you hadn't left your cell phone I would've waited in the loft until you got home."

"All day?" she frowned.

"As long as it took," he confirmed.

"Why?"

"Because I wasn't sorry," Kevin reminded her.

"I wasn't either," she replied, "But I knew I should have been. That's why I left so abruptly."

"Guilt for not feeling guilty."

"Exactly," she nodded.

"You okay?" he studied her for a moment.

"I will be," she released a heavy sigh, "It just feels more real now that I have my own place."

"That this is your life now," Kevin nodded.

"Yeah," Alexis said.

"You still have my number?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"I have your number. I really think we should start using them more."

"Yeah, me too," she replied.

"Good," Kevin smiled.

"And do this some more," Alexis pointed to the ice cream.

"Yes, there can never be enough ice cream," he scooped out another spoonful.

"We could do the grown up version of ice cream," Alexis pointed out.

"Which is?"

"A drink after work," Alexis smiled.

"Yes, we can do that too," he agreed.

"Are we crazy for doing this?"

"For having ice cream?" he asked.

"For trying to be friends," Alexis said.

"No," he shook his head, "Feels pretty good actually."

"Thank you for coming back," she replied.

"You're welcome. I'm glad you let me in."

"That's never been a problem with us. Even when I knew what could happen I always let you in."

"I'm always going to be there for you, Lex," he reached for her hand, "No matter what does or doesn't happen between us, I'm always going to be your friend."

Alexis smiled at him, "I-it's getting late. I should go to sleep."

"Did you want me to tuck you in?" he gave her a teasing smile.

"I don't think that's the best of ideas."

"Probably not," he chuckled, "But when has that ever stopped us?"

Alexis put the lid on the ice cream and placed it in the freezer. "Good night, Kevin," she walked him to the door.

He leaned over and kissed her cheek, "Good night Lex. Sleep well."

"You too," she touched his cheek softly before closing the door.

"Baby steps," she told herself as she made her way to her bedroom.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin smiled to himself as he walked down the hall to the elevator.

He hadn't really expected Alexis to let him into her apartment after the way she'd crumbled earlier, but as he stepped onto the elevator he felt hope for probably the first time that maybe they could get backed to what they once had, the friendship and maybe something more.

It was the something more that made his breath catch as he let some memories slideshow through his mind.

It all built towards this moment. He didn't want to give himself false hope, but he could feel this was building towards something, something that he hoped would bring him happiness.

He knew it was too soon to broach the subject of any kind of romantic future with Alexis, but he couldn't help but want it…her. He'd missed her so damn much.

A cold shower at his mother's place seemed to be calling his name. First he pulled out his phone and called his daughter. He'd gotten into the habit of calling her near her bedtime just to say goodnight.

He smiled as he walked out of the Alexis's building, talking to his daughter and never realizing that someone was watching him from across the street.


	11. Chapter 10

For all the great replies, here's an extra chapter.

-d-d-d-d-

"Lex, I'm going to get some lunch," Lanie decided to give Alexis some space. It was clear that she needed some alone time as she'd been quiet since they'd returned from their crime scene. "Did you want anything?"

"No, I'm good. Thanks, Lanie," Alexis gave an attempt at a smile. "Tell Javi I said 'hi'."

"I will," Lanie gathered her belongings and left, nearly bumping into Kevin on her way out. "Hey, Kev, you might want to come back later. Alexis isn't having the best of days."

"Beckett's on my back about an autopsy report," Kevin told her.

"Well, don't say I didn't warn you," Lanie replied, "Javi and I are getting some lunch. Did you want me to bring you back anything?"

"No, thanks. I'm good," Kevin backed into Autopsy to see Alexis staring down at the body before her.

Alexis didn't seem to notice Kevin when he came into the room and stood beside her.

"Alexis?" Kevin said quietly.

"Kevin," Alexis jumped a mile in fright, "How long have you been here?"

"Just got here," Kevin smiled. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she reached for the file that she was assuming he'd come for, "Here's the file Kate wanted."

"Thanks," Kevin took the file and took a second look at the guy on the table. "Did he do himself in?"

"That's quite insensitive, Detective," Alexis snapped at him.

"Excuse me? It's a valid question. He was hanging from a ceiling fan."

"I know. I saw him," Alexis said.

"Lex, is something wrong?" he say something resembling pain in her eyes, "It's not like either of us have never seen a DB before."

"I'm fine," she said.

"Lex, if you want to talk," he began.

"I don't," Alexis cut him off. "Don't you have something to do?"

"Yeah, I need to know if this guy offed himself, or if I have work to do," Kevin replied.

"Show some respect," she hissed, "A man died today. Whether it was by his own hand or not, he deserves respect."

"He was a drug addicted gang banger," Kevin said. "He probably shot at cops."

"You don't know that. You don't know anything about him."

"It's my job to know how someone died, and if it was at the hands of someone else to hold the person responsible. How about you do your job and tell me how he died?"

"Were you always this much of a jackass or is a recent development?"

"You're obviously going through something, so we'll talk later," Kevin motioned to leave.

"That's it," Alexis snorted, "Just walk away. It's what you always do."

"I'm not the one who left, Alexis," Kevin turned around to face her. "That was you."

"All the times you told me you loved me," Alexis shook her head. "It didn't stop you from nailing Jenny."

"You don't know one damn thing about my relationship with Jenny," Kevin growled.

"Only what you told me," Alexis said. "Things couldn't have been too bad if you not only stayed, you slept with her. Lanie told me about your recent pregnancy scare."

"Yeah, I got low-"

"You don't know what low is."

"I don't know what low is?" he challenged her, "The love of my life just up and left on a whim. The only companion I had was someone that I had to get fall down drunk in order to even have a thought to relieve some tension. I know what low is."

"No, you really don't. I'll let you know when I have a verdict on what happened," she turned her back on him.

Kevin stormed out of Autopsy.

Alexis's eyes spilled over as she sank to her knees.

"Where's Lanie?" Esposito walked into Autopsy.

"And hello to you, too," Alexis rolled her eyes.

"Sorry," he responded quickly, "I'm in kind of a mood. Is Lanie around?"

"OCCB got a couple of dead drug mules. She's handling that."

"Figures," Javi rolled his eyes, "Need to talk, and she's not here to listen."

"Why don't you talk to Kevin?" Alexis offered, "He's your partner. Isn't that part of the gig?"

"Not when he's the problem," Javier rolled his eyes, "Of all days for your dad to be on a camp out with Ian."

"Maybe I can help," Alexis replied.

"Can you tell me how to kill someone and not leave any evidence?"

Alexis looked at him, "It can't be that bad."

"He's in such a foul mood," Javi groaned, "I don't know what happened. He was fine when I went to lunch. I come back, and he bit my head off because I was two minutes late. It's like he's been possessed by an evil spirit or something."

"Maybe he's retaining sperm," Alexis said.

"What?" Javi cringed, "Ew, that's just…ew."

"What? Like when Lanie or Kate or even Gates are in a pissy mood, you don't think PMS automatically," Alexis said as lightly as she could while her mind started to race.

"It's gotta be something with him and Jenny," Javi responded, "She's been calling him every day at the office. She has a curious knack for calling at all the wrong times…Wait, should I even be talking to you about this?"

"It's fine Javi," Alexis turned around. "It gives me something to think about besides the fact that the man who killed my husband is still walking around free."

"You know him pretty well. What should I do? Let him stew? Punch his lights out?"

"I don't know him that well anymore," Alexis commented. "Did you ask him what his problem was?"

"What am I, a chick?"

Alexis rolled her eyes, "How have Lanie and Kate not kicked you in the family jewels after all these years?"

"Don't think they haven't tried," Espo snorted.

"Just let him stew," Alexis stated finally, "He'll work himself out of his funk or whatever got him into the funk will work itself out."

"I'm trying. I came down here because I was about to knock his lights out," Javier explained. "Maybe you should talk to him."

"I don't think that's a hot idea."

Suddenly the pieces fell into place for the clueless detective. It wasn't Jenny that had put his partner in a foul mood. It had been Alexis.

"I guess I should get back upstairs," Espo stated.

"Anything you want me to tell Lanie?"

"Yeah, tell her I need a drink later."

"I will," Alexis nodded as Javier left.

Alone in Autopsy, Alexis realized just how hard she'd been on Kevin early. She'd taken out her anger on him without him knowing the entire story. She had to apologize.

Kevin sighed when he left the precinct after a long day. Javier was at his side.

"You wanna get a drink or something before we head home?" he asked his friend. Kevin needed to blow off some steam.

"I would, but I think you've got plans," Javier pointed behind Kevin.

"What?" Kevin turned around and saw Alexis standing near the edge of the stairs. She waved uncertainly.

"Come for round two?"

"No. Hi, Espo," Alexis acknowledged the other man.

"Doc," he smiled. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Alexis waited until they were alone again, "I wanted to talk if you were willing to listen."

"Depends if you're going to rip my head off again," Kevin responded, "If that's the case, I'll pass."

"Just a calm talk where I explain what was going on today."

"Wanna get some coffee or something stronger?"

"Coffee. I still have to go home and deal with three kids," Alexis smiled as she pointed across the street. "It's on me."

Kevin nodded and followed her to the coffee shop that all the cops in the precinct frequented.

They sat at an outside table, taking advantage of the warm weather.

"I can handle most suicides," Alexis began after they'd received their coffee, "Head in the oven, overdose, slit wrists, even a gun to the head. Hangings get to me."

"Why?"

Alexis took out her wallet and removed a picture. She slid it over to him.

"Is this Christopher?" he glanced at the photo of the two men, "He didn't..."

"Chris is on the left. His brother, Cade, is on the right," Alexis frowned, "He was the best man at our wedding. He was bipolar."

"I don't know what low is," Kevin repeated her earlier words to him.

"I had no right to say that to you."

"Wait. Did you say 'was'?"

"Chris and I had been married about a year. It was a part of my studies to work with a local M.E.'s office. We got called out to a hotel. When we arrived, I saw Cade hanging from the shower rod," Alexis said quietly.

"I'm sorry, Lex. That must have been tough."

"The toughest part was telling Christopher," Alexis tried to shake the image of her husband's anguished response to her news out of her mind, "Even knowing that he never saw pictures from the scene, he still saw it when he closed his eyes at night."

"I'm sorry, Lex," he reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze.

"This morning I got called out to a no-tell motel for a suicide. It just frayed my nerves. Then I was talking to Lanie. We were just talking about random things, and she mentioned that she'd thought Jenny had been pregnant a few years ago. For some reason I hated the idea of you and her having another child even though I had no right to feel that way. Then you came in a bit later."

"I never did have the greatest of timing."

Alexis smiled, "I just wanted to tell you that I am sorry for what I said. I have zero right to judge you."

"I meant what I said earlier. I was only with Jenny when I was extremely wasted."

"It's none of my business," Alexis shook her head.

"But it is," Kevin swallowed hard.

"Kevin, I have no claim on you. I walked away."

"You still have a claim on my heart," he decided to take a risk.

"I can't, Kevin," Alexis pulled her hand away, "My husband just died. I can't even think about getting involved yet, and our past issues aren't resolved. You're still married."

"Technically that may be true, but not for much longer," Kevin nodded. "I don't want to push, but I missed you, Lex."

"I missed you too," she replied, "But I found a way to move on. I had hoped that you would too, whether it was back with Jenny or with someone else."

"I wanted to," Kevin admitted. "I tried, but it always felt like a mistake."

"I'm sorry. That's not what I wanted for you."

"You don't owe me any apologies, Lex," Kevin smiled. "Have dinner with me."

"Kevin," Alexis shook her head.

"Just as friends," he said. "We were friends first."

"Maybe in a few weeks," she replied, "The kids are still getting comfortable in their routine. I don't want to mess with that just yet."

"Can I drive you home?"

"Maybe another night," she replied.

"What's wrong, Lex?" he frowned, "It's just a ride home."

"I just want to walk," Alexis said. "I could use the fresh air, and it's a nice night."

"Then I'll walk with you," he offered, "This is New York, after all."

"I'm good, Kev," she assured him, "I have my pepper spray handy, and Kate always made sure that I was up on the self defensive classes."

"I don't want to say goodnight just yet," Kevin admitted.

"Alright," Alexis agreed. "Let's go."

Kevin fished out his wallet to leave a tip for the waitress.

"Hey, put that away," she commanded him, "I said I was buying."

"You did," Kevin put a couple singles down. "But I can leave the tip."

"It was coffee, Kevin, not a five course meal. I can swing the tip," she snapped up the bills and forced them back into his hand.

"Let me be the gentleman," he smiled.

"You always are," Alexis smiled. "Fine."

Kevin set down the bills a second time before following her down the sidewalk.

They walked in silence for a few blocks before Alexis spoke, "I actually missed this place."

"Crescent City didn't cut it?"

"Mardi Gras was fun," Alexis admitted.

"I bet it was."

"You ever been?"

"No," Kevin shook his head.

"I told Chris I was pregnant with Maggie at Mardi Gras," Alexis admitted.

"I bet that made him the happiest man at Mardi Gras." Kevin recalled his own experience with learning he would be a father.

"He picked me up, twirled me around and around. He said he hoped it would be a girl," she said softly.

"I remember the feeling of finding out I was going to be a father for the first time. It was one of the happiest times of my life."

"I remember the night Dad came home and told me that Sarah Grace had been born. I'd just finished watching the news footage of the fire you and Espo were stuck in that night. I was glad you two were alive."

"I was thankful for a bit more," he replied.

"Yeah. Lanie told me the whole story," Alexis smiled. "You really wanted to name the baby Javier if it'd been a boy?"

"You sound just like him," Kevin laughed. "Busting on me for being sentimental?"

"Not at all. Hunter's middle name is King," Alexis said. "But if I'd had him in a hospital, it was going to be Javier."

"That's twice that Javi has lost out," Kevin snorted, "Poor guy can't catch a break."

"You haven't asked me yet," Alexis smiled.

"Asked you what?"

"Well, Cade is named for Chris's brother and my dad. Maggie is named for the first song Chris and I ever danced to. You haven't asked why I used the name Hunter."

"Why Hunter?" he dutifully asked.

"Can you keep a secret?"

"You know I can."

"You remember when I was kidnapped?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded, remembering the horrible ordeal.

"Well, I was taken because of my grandfather, my dad's father."

"I thought you guys didn't know who he was," Kevin said.

"We didn't at the time, but people knew who we were. I was taken because my grandfather killed someone's wife."

"How does this relate to Hunter's name?"

"The name he gave my dad was Jackson Hunt. I have no idea if it's his real name or not, but it's the name we had. I wasn't particularly fond of the name Jackson, so I used Hunt."

"You named our son after a man that killed someone's wife?"

"No, I named him after my grandfather," Alexis shot him a look.

"Oh," Kevin replied.

"Well, here we are," Alexis stopped in front of a building.

"Enjoy what's left of your night," Kevin rocked back on his heels.

"You too," Alexis smiled. "Thanks for listening. You could have just as easily blown me off."

"I could never blow you off," he replied.

"Are you hungry?" she asked suddenly.

"Offering me dinner?" he asked.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I made a meatloaf this morning and left instructions for Jim to put it in the oven about an hour ago. It should be ready. Feel like eating with us?"

"Tempting, but I should be getting home. Sarah Grace will likely be needing help with her homework."

"Another time," Alexis smiled. "Goodnight."

"Good night."

-d-dd-d-

Keep up the replies!


	12. Chapter 11

In honor of Seamus's birthday, I'm posting early this week. Think he knows how many of us want to see him and Alexis get together? ;)

=s=s=s=s=s=s=

Alexis stared at the phone and then closed her eyes, blocking it from sight.

 _Coward._

"Mommy, Cade took my doll," Maggie ran to her mother for support.

"Cade, why are you tormenting your sister?" Alexis opened her eyes again with an internal groan.

"She hid my video game," Cade defended his actions.

"Maggie," Alexis frowned at her youngest.

Maggie pouted when she ran off to retrieve Cade's game.

"Cade, taking your sister's doll is not the solution to your problem," Alexis scolded her son.

"Sorry," Cade ducked his head and for a moment he looked so much like Christopher that Alexis felt like crying.

"When your sister gives you back your game, you apologize for talking her doll," Alexis stated, "She is younger than you and doesn't know better. You do."

"Yes, Mom," Cade went to get Maggie's doll back.

Alexis watched him go and then tipped her head back against the couch again.

"Mommy, are you sad?" Maggie returned with the video game in her hands.

"No, I'm not sad. I'm just thinking."

"Can I give you a hug anyways?" the little girl climbed up into her mother's lap.

"Yes, Baby, you can," Alexis smiled and wrapped her arms around her daughter, "I'll take hugs anytime I can get them."

Maggie happily hugged her mother tightly, "I love you, Mommy."

"I love you, too," Alexis smiled.

"Now give Cade back his game and apologize for taking it. You should know better than that."

"Yes, Mommy," Maggie scampered off to make her trade.

"Hey, Mom, can you help me with my homework?" Hunter came into the room.

"In a few minutes," Alexis smiled, "I have a phone call to make first."

"Okay, I'll be upstairs," Hunter said.

"I'll be up in a bit," Alexis smiled.

Alexis disappeared into her bedroom to avoid any distractions.

" _Ryan,"_ Kevin answered his phone after Alexis gathered the courage to dial.

"Hey, it's me," Alexis smiled.

" _Hey, Alexis,"_ Kevin strolled into the break room at the precinct to have some privacy, _"What's up?"_

"I've been thinking about you and Hunter," she confessed.

" _Yeah?"_ he asked hopefully.

"I'd like it if you came and had dinner with us," she said quietly.

" _Oh,"_ Kevin responded.

"You and Sarah Grace," she added.

" _Both of us?"_

"I think it's time you were all introduced. We didn't do that at Christmas or even when you helped us move."

" _Yeah, I think it's time too,"_ he replied, _"What's changed your mind?"_

"It's time, Kevin," Alexis replied, "Is there really any reason that I need?"

" _No,"_ Kevin said. _"When?"_

"Tonight if you and Sarah Grace are free," she replied, "I understand that Sarah Grace might be with her mother tonight, so if tonight doesn't work, maybe another night this week."

" _No, I can make it work,"_ Kevin assured her. _"What time?"_

"Six?"

" _I'll see you then,"_ he smiled.

"See you then," Alexis nodded.

Alexis instantly felt better when she emerged from her bedroom and tended to the usual tasks of raising three children.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Kevin was smiling when he hung up the phone and walked back into the squad room.

"What are you so happy about?"

"Lex invited me and Sarah Grace to dinner," Kevin smiled broadly and after looking around to make sure the coast was clear, added, "I get to meet my son."

"Good for you, Man," Javier smiled. "Gonna sleep with her?"

"What?"

"Just kidding," Javier snorted.

"I have to call Jenny. She wasn't dropping Sarah Grace off until seven," Kevin pulled out his phone.

"And what time are you expected?"

"Six," Kevin dialed his ex-wife. The window to pick up Sarah Grace was rather narrow.

"Good luck, Bro," Javier snorted just before Jenny answered.

" _Hello?"_

"Jenny, it's Kevin."

" _Don't tell me,"_ Jenny began bitterly, _"You have to work late, so you can't see Sarah Grace tonight."_

"No, actually I was wondering if you'd mind if I picked her up at school," Kevin replied, "She and I have plans for tonight."

" _What kind of plans?"_

"We have a dinner invitation."

" _Anyone I know?"_ Jenny asked.

"Is that really any of your concern?" Kevin asked.

" _She is my daughter,"_ Jenny replied.

"She's also my daughter," Kevin reminded her. "She and I are going to have dinner with some friends. I'll have her home by nine-thirty."

" _I thought she was spending the night with you at your mother's,"_ Jenny responded impatiently, _"I have plans myself this evening."_

"I apologize. I'll be more than happy to take her back to my mom's with me. Have a good evening. I'll pick her up from school."

Jenny ended the call without another word.

"And have a nice day to you, too," Kevin muttered.

"How'd it go?" Javier gave a curious smile.

"Well, I get to pick up my daughter and keep her for the night," Kevin told him with an eager grin.

"It could have gone worse," Javier shrugged.

"How did I make it over ten years without strangling that woman?"

"Didn't you say something about living in a haze?" Javi asked.

"Good point," Kevin nodded. "Should I take wine with me tonight?"

"Considering it's just the two of you and four kids, probably not the best idea," Javier replied.

"Good point," Kevin frowned. "Dessert. I'll bring dessert."

"Do you know Hunter's favorite by any chance?" Javier asked, "To butter him up."

"He liked that chocolate and peanut butter cake that Beckett made at Christmas."

"Isn't chocolate and peanut butter your favorite combo?" Espo asked.

"Yeah," Kevin smiled a little. "Sarah Grace's too."

"How familial," Esposito smirked.

"Go solve some crime or something," Kevin glared at his partner.

Esposito snorted and walked away.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis set the table and smiled at her son as he came down the stairs, "You look nice."

"You said to dress nice," Hunter reminded her.

"Yes, I did," Alexis nodded.

"And why are we seeing this guy again?" Hunter asked.

"Because he's a friend," Alexis smiled. "I haven't spent a lot of time with him since I've been back."

"Just a friend?" Hunter asked.

"Just a friend," Alexis repeated.

"Fine," Hunter moaned.

"You'll like Sarah Grace," Alexis assured him, "She's very nice."

"Girls," Hunter frowned.

"Horrors," Alexis teased.

"Mommy, can you make a bow?" Maggie darted into the room with a ribbon in her hand that she wanted her mother to wrap around her ponytail.

"Of course," Alexis tied a bow in her daughter's hair. "Where's Cade? Cade? Come on."

Cade came into the room to see his mother beyond frazzled, "What's the big deal about this dinner anyways?"

"No big deal," Alexis shook her head. "I just want you all to look nice."

Each child gave her a skeptical look just as the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," Maggie ran towards the door.

"Ask who it is first," Alexis called.

Maggie complete ignored her mother's request and pulled the door open. "Hi."

"Maggie Mae, what did I tell you?" Alexis appeared behind her daughter. She looked to see Kevin and Sarah Grace, "Hi, guys. Come in."

Maggie waved off her mother's scolding. She was overjoyed that another girl was joining them for dinner. Being outnumbered for most of her life by her brothers, she loved it when the tables were turned. "Hi, I'm Maggie."

"Hey there, Maggie," Kevin smiled. "You remember me? I'm Kevin."

Maggie frowned for a moment. It had been a few months since Christmas, and she'd forgotten entire about the holiday except for the gifts she received. She began shaking her head from side to side.

"It's okay, Sweetie," Alexis scooped Maggie up. "Can you say 'hello' to Kevin and Sarah Grace?"

"I just did," Maggie told her mother.

"How about you say hi again?" Alexis chuckled.

"Hello," Maggie waved.

"Hi," Sarah Grace said.

"Can we play with my dolls until dinner, Mom?" Maggie asked her mother.

"Only if Sarah Grace wants to," Alexis replied.

"Sure," Sarah Grace nodded.

Alexis let Maggie down and the two girls went upstairs as Kevin shut the door behind him.

"Boys, come over here."

Cade and Hunter came running in.

"Boys, this is my friend, Kevin," Alexis replied, "Kevin, this is Cade and Hunter."

"Nice to meet you both," Kevin said shaking both of their hands.

"Hi," Cade smiled while Hunter regarded the man with a bit of suspicion.

"I brought dessert," Kevin extended the pie he'd brought along, "I hope everyone likes peanut butter and chocolate."

"Sounds delicious," Alexis said. "Doesn't it guys?"

"Yep," Cade nodded enthusiastically, while Hunter continued to remain silent.

"Why don't you two go watch a movie until dinner?" Alexis suggested.

The boys quickly wandered off.

"He hates me," Kevin frowned once they were alone.

"No," Alexis shook her head as they went into the kitchen. "It doesn't matter how great you are. He'd still be acting this way. You're the first guy to enter our life since Christopher."

"I suppose it was wishful thinking to simply come in and have him start calling me Dad right off the bat," Kevin took a seat at the counter while Alexis moved about the kitchen to finish the preparation.

"Maybe just a bit," she laughed.

"What's he like?" Kevin asked.

Alexis turned around and saw the expression on Kevin's face. She wanted to cry; he looked so lost. She nearly reached out to hug him but resisted.

"He's quiet," Alexis replied, "Super smart, loves baseball and comic books."

Kevin nodded with a smile, "Really?"

"Yeah. He's a reader. He's got all my dad's books practically memorized."

"I hope you edited out the parts about Nikki Heat and that reporter steaming things up," Kevin chuckled.

"Blacked it out," Alexis assured him. "He wants to be a cop."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "Not sure if that's nature or nurture."

"Could be a bit of both," Kevin asked hopefully.

"Most likely," Alexis nodded. "Chris was with the Sheriff's Department before joining NCIS."

"I think you've mentioned that, or maybe it was Beckett or Castle."

"When he gets old enough, he's going to need someone to show him how to shoot," Alexis told him.

"Javi might question whether I'd be the right teacher," Kevin smirked.

"You taught me," Alexis reminded him.

"I had ulterior motives," he fidgeted slightly.

"Getting to put your arms around me," Alexis surmised.

"Yeah, that was about it," he nodded.

"Just like playing pool," she turned to chop some lettuce for the salad while Kevin watched, wanting to slide his arms around her like he had a million times before.

"Happy to be home?" he asked.

"Yeah, I missed New York," Alexis nodded.

"I know lots of people missed having you in New York," Kevin replied.

"Yeah, I know," she nodded.

"I think the only person who missed you more than me was Castle."

"I missed him too," Alexis replied, "It was weird to only have him available on the phone. Most of my life, he was the one that I talked to the most and counted on."

"Lex," Kevin started.

"Kevin, we can't do this now."

"Yeah, I know," he nodded.

Alexis turned to face him, "I will say this. I missed you, too."

"Good," he smiled.

"Dinner is going to be ready soon," Alexis replied, "Why don't you go bond with the boys for a bit. Hunter will show that he doesn't hate you."

"Yeah," Kevin headed upstairs while Alexis let herself lean heavily on the counter and then sink to sit on the floor, legs out in front of her. How was she supposed to do this? How did she let herself trust again?

Alexis managed to pick herself off the floor and handle final dinner preparations, miraculously without spilling her own blood. Her thoughts continued to drift to her husband and how happy she'd been until the building blew before her eyes.

She put the knife down and took her phone from her purse. She listened to the voicemail she hadn't had the heart to erase.

" _Hey, Darling, it's me. I'm going to be late for dinner tonight, again. We have to run down this lead before we put the day to bed. Don't hold dinner for me. I love you."_

Alexis wiped away the tear that had fallen and put her phone back into her purse before poured some wine for herself.

"Mommy, Sarah Grace and I are hungry," Maggie came bubbling into the kitchen, demanding attention.

"You are?" Alexis quickly masked her turmoil, "Well, then I'd best get dinner on the table. Will you go to the game room and call the boys down to eat?"

"Sure," Maggie smiled as she darted up the stairs. Kevin appeared in the doorway.

"You okay?"

"Sure," Alexis nodded.

"No," Kevin shook his head. "You can't hide when you're upset from me, Lex. You never could."

"I thought I was ready for this. I wanted to be ready for this, for you. I know you want to get to know Hunter. You deserve to know him, but I'm sorry I'm just not…" she began to get teary eyed.

"Hey, it's okay," Kevin touched her shoulder, "This is just dinner between two old friends. There are no expectations on my end."

"Kevin," Alexis gave him a look.

"I swear," Kevin said. "All I want here is to catch up with my friend and get to know her kids."

"That's not entirely true," she glared at him.

"I'd be lying if I said that I wanted nothing more, but I don't expect it yet. Your husband just died," he responded, "I'd be a horrible human being if I demanded that we hop into the sack tonight."

Alexis couldn't help the snort that came out of her.

"There she is," Kevin smiled at her.

"God, you're such a good guy," she shook her head.

"Not always," Kevin shook his head and stood next to her so their shoulders were touching. "I know that's what you need right now, so I'm trying."

"Thanks," she smiled at him.

"Come on," he nudged her, "Let's eat. The kids are starving. When was the last time you fed them, Dr. LaSalle?"

"They had lunch, the boys at school and I fed Maggie myself," Alexis defended herself as they put the food out. "Guys? Dinner."

There was a thundering sound as Cade and Hunter made their way down the stairs.

"Mom, Detective Ryan is pretty good at that video game Santa got us for Christmas," Hunter announced after they'd said grace and were passing around the dishes of food to fill their plates, "Way better than you."

"For some reason boys seem to be better at video games. Besides, Detective Ryan plays with Uncle Javi all the time."

"Really?" Cade looked towards Ryan, "Uncle Javi plays too?"

"He tries," Kevin nodded.

"Oh come on, I've seen Javi and my dad play," Alexis said. "They can go for hours. Kate would get so mad about ruined dinner plans."

"Kate isn't the only one that gets mad at him," Kevin laughed.

"Momma, are Uncle Javi and Aunt Lanie getting married?" Maggie asked.

"Do me a favor, Maggie Mae," Kevin said. "Ask Aunt Lanie that in front of Uncle Javi."

"Okay, Defective Wyan," Maggie smiled.

Alexis snorted at her daughter's pronunciation.

"Trying to stir up trouble for your partner, aren't you, Defective Wyan," Alexis snickered.

"You guys can call me 'Kevin'," he smiled.

"Okay," Maggie nodded.

"Cade, have some salad," Alexis said.

Cade frowned at having to eat something green. He was a meat and potatoes boy like his father.

"No salad, no dessert," Alexis smiled.

"I don't like that rule," Cade reluctantly helped himself to the smallest portion of salad he could get away with and still have dessert.

"You don't have to like it," Alexis's smile never faltered. It was obvious that they'd had this conversation before. "You still have to follow it."

Cade frowned as he ate his dinner. Hunter was practically inhaling his food.

"Hunter, slow down. Chew. Taste," Alexis laughed.

"I'm hungry," he paused from his inhaling for a moment.

"I understand that," Alexis smiled. "As a doctor I know the Heimlich, but I do not want to perform it on my son. Please slow down."

"You only work on dead people," Maggie giggled.

"I had to learn how to take care of live people, too," Alexis scrunched her nose at her daughter. "Don't hide your carrots in your napkin, Maggie Mae. Eat them."

"No," Maggie moaned.

"No veggies, no dessert," Alexis reminded her daughter.

"I don't like that rule either," Maggie plopped her carrots back on her plate.

"I know," Alexis laughed, "I'm a horrible mother. I make my kids eat their vegetables."

"Dad makes me eat mine, too," Sarah Grace confided to Maggie.

"Do you like vegetables?" Maggie turned towards Sarah Grace.

"Some of them," Sarah Grace nodded, "I like carrots and lettuce, but I don't like peas, especially the ones in school. Yuck."

Alexis laughed, and they finished dinner.

"Why don't you guys go upstairs and finish the movie while I clean up?" Alexis suggested. "I'll call you down for dessert in a bit."

The quartet of children darted up the stairs, leaving Kevin and Alexis to clear the table and do dishes.

"So that went well, right?" Alexis asked him.

"Yeah, it wasn't bad. It's different to see you as a mom," Kevin helped her clear the table.

"You don't have to help. Go up and hang with the kids."

"Five's a crowd," Kevin shook his head, "Besides I want Sarah Grace to get comfortable with them. She's usually very shy, and with me around she won't assert herself."

"Like father, like daughter," Alexis carried a handful of dirty dishes into the kitchen.

"Yeah, it's something like that," Kevin replied, "The separation hasn't helped. I talked to her teacher today when I went to pick her up. She's been quieter than usual."

"Hunter does that," Alexis nodded. "When he's upset, he kind of retreats into himself."

"Yeah, it's definitely a Ryan thing," Kevin frowned.

"Cade, I can't shut up no matter what kind of mood he's in," Alexis giggled.

"And Miss Maggie?" Kevin asked.

"Oh, she'll let you know what mood she's in," Alexis assured him, "She acts out her emotions very well."

"Sounds like a certain grandmother I knew," Kevin smiled.

"She's got a whole lot of Martha in her," Alexis agreed.

"She was a good lady. I know she knew, but she never gave me any kind of flack about it."

"Gram never judged. She just supported me and my decisions," Alexis smiled, "God, it's been over eight years, and I still miss her."

"I know," Kevin smiled. "I still half expect to see her when I go to Castle's."

"For almost a year after I left New York, there wasn't a week when I didn't pick up the phone to call her."

"Castle was pretty lost for awhile. With your grandmother being gone and you leaving the city, there were times me and Javi thought he might stop working with the precinct," Kevin admitted.

"He loves being in the thick of things way too much to let you guys have all the fun," Alexis shook her head. "Nothing short of Kate retiring will get him out of the precinct."

"He hasn't been around as much after Kate started having kids. He wanted to be around to raise them," Kevin replied, "We make due."

"The minute Jo's in school all day, you will be listening to his insane theories all day once again."

"You think so?" Kevin asked, "Boy, we'd better start preparing ourselves now. That's not far away."

"Tell me about it," Alexis shook her head. "Maggie's on her way there, too."

"Did you and Chris think about more kids?"

"He mentioned maybe another girl, but we were good for the moment," Alexis nodded.

"Yeah, Jenny and I didn't ever talk about it," Kevin replied, "Not in the last eight years anyways."

"You came from a big family. I'm surprised you didn't want one."

"It just wasn't in the cards for me and Jenny," he replied, "It was a challenge conceiving Sarah Grace, and that was when we were still on good terms."

"You guys went through those tests, right?" Alexis asked.

"Yeah, but they turned out to be unnecessary because she was already pregnant."

"Well, we know there's nothing wrong with your plumbing," Alexis giggled.

"Yeah, it wasn't impossible for me and Jenny, obviously as we had Sarah Grace, but the doctors had told us that conception would always be difficult," he admitted.

"Not that difficult," Alexis said with a meaningful look.

"It might be what really started us down the wrong path," Kevin seemed to be staring off into space, "Jenny always blamed herself and thought I did too."

"Hey," Alexis took his hand. "You have a beautiful little girl upstairs who adores you. Don't go down the other road. It's bumpy and it leads you to a dead end."

"I know," Kevin nodded, "I've picked apart my marriage enough. I just need to face that it's at the end and move on."

Alexis looked over her shoulder and then hugged him, "I'm sorry."

"Thanks," he returned the hug briefly, "How about we cut into the dessert? I could use a good sugar rush right now."

"Sure," Alexis nodded as she got out the dessert plates. "Go put these out and call the kids down."

Kevin went about his task with no further comment. The promise of sugar brought the thundering herd down from the game room.

Alexis set out plates and forks before she started to slice up the cake and serve it, "Okay, everyone wants a piece, right?"

There was a chorus of cheers which brought out a laugh from both Alexis and Kevin.

"Peanut butter and chocolate," Alexis laughed, "Always a winning combination with these kids. Good choice, Kevin."

"It's one of my favorites," Kevin said sheepishly.

"Mine too," Sarah Grace smiled.

"Me too," Hunter chimed in.

"Me too," Maggie added, mostly because she looked up to her big brother and wanted to like everything he did.

"I like it, too," Cade didn't want to be left out.

"Then you should all be very busy eating," Alexis smiled.

Silence reigned as everyone dug into the dessert.

Alexis looked around her and smiled. This was nice. It felt like old times only better.

Kevin traded a knowing look. He could almost read her mind.

_D_D_D_D_

"Sarah Grace, go press the elevator button. I'll be right there."

"Okay," Sarah Grace smiled before she looked at Alexis, "Thank you for dinner, Alexis. It was very good."

"I'm glad you liked it," Alexis smiled, "You can join us any time, okay?"

"Thank you," Sarah Grace smiled and headed for the elevator.

"Good manners," Alexis smiled at Kevin.

"Takes after her father," Kevin chuckled, "Thanks for dinner."

"You're very welcome," Alexis smiled. "We should do it again sometime."

"Yeah, we definitely should," he nodded, "Soon."

"We could have dinner in the park sometime soon. It's getting warmer."

"That'd be nice," he agreed, "I'll call you next week to work out a date."

"Okay," Alexis smiled and then kissed his cheek. "Night."

"Night, Alexis," he replied before jogging to the elevator and hopping in.

Sarah Grace gave Alexis a wave as she watched them go.

Alexis waved back with a smile and then shut the door after the elevator doors closed.

"Mommy, can Sarah Grace come over again," Maggie pulled on her mother's shirt to get her attention, "I like her."

"Yeah, I think we can arrange that," Alexis smiled. "But right now, I know someone who should be in bed."

"Aw," Maggie moaned when her mother picked her and carried her to her bedroom.

"I know," Alexis said. "It's not fair that you have to go to bed after having such a fun night, but them's the breaks, little girl."

Maggie frowned all the way to her room.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin waited until they were out on the street before he started the conversation about Alexis and her family with Sarah Grace.

"So what did you think of my friend, Alexis, and her family, Peanut?" Kevin held the car door open for his daughter.

"They're nice. Maggie's fun for a little kid," Sarah Grace said with a smile. "Dad, where are they from?"

"Well, Alexis is from here, but she moved to Louisiana several years ago," he explained, "Why do you ask?"

"They talk different," Sarah Grace frowned.

"Do you mean their accents?" he asked.

Sarah Grace nodded.

"They probably think that we talk funny too," Kevin used his best Irish accent to draw out a laugh from his daughter.

"You sound like the leprechaun in the Lucky Charms commercial," Sarah Grace giggled.

"Oh, very nice," Kevin smiled as he started the car. "Would you be opposed to spending more time with them?"

"What's 'opposed' mean?" Sarah Grace frowned.

"It means that you wouldn't want to spend time with them if you said yes," he stated after a moment of thought.

"Then no," Sarah Grace replied.

"Good," Kevin smiled. "How are you and your mom doing?"

"Okay, I guess," she sighed.

"What's wrong, Peanut?" he coaxed her into talking to him.

"Mom says mean things about you," Sarah Grace admitted quietly.

"Well, Mom is very mad at me," he stated.

"Because you don't want to be married to her anymore," Sarah Grace nodded.

"Right," Kevin said. "You know that none of this is your fault, right?"

"Yes," his daughter smiled. "I've seen enough TV to know that."

"Good," Kevin smiled back at her.

"Dad, do you like Alexis?" she asked, "I mean, like her, like her."

"Why do you ask that?"

"Just the way you looked at her tonight," Sarah Grace said.

"It's complicated," Kevin replied.

"But you like her," Sarah Grace nodded.

"We're old friends. I've known her a long time."

"How long?" she asked.

"About fifteen years."

"You've known her longer than I've been alive," Sarah Grace frowned.

"Yeah, I've known her almost as long as I've known your mother," he agreed.

"And you met her because she's Uncle Castle's daughter, right?"

"Yeah," he nodded.

"She's nice," Sarah Grace said again.

"I'm glad you think so."

"It's okay if you like her, Daddy," Sarah Grace said a few moments later.

"Thanks, Peanut," Kevin glanced towards his daughter with a smile. She was staring out the window at the passing buildings.

"You're welcome," she yawned.

"How about before school tomorrow, I take you out for a big breakfast?" Kevin suggested, "Waffles with whipped cream eyes and a bacon smile. Your favorite, right?"

"Yes," she smiled at him. "Thanks Daddy."

Sarah Grace was asleep before they arrived at his mother's place. He didn't have the heart to wake her, so he carried her up to his mother's place.

=d=d=d=d=d=

Thanks to all of you who replied last time. I'd like to hear from you who don't reply so much to know what you think. Am I going to slowly?


	13. Chapter 12

This is an early birthday present for AK Hunter. Happy B-day hon. Enjoy. To everyone else, thanks for the replies. They were awesome. I would like to break a hundred sometime soon, so can all of the people reading, please reply?

-d-d-d-d-d-

Alexis rubbed her hands together while she waited for Kevin to arrive at the agreed upon entrance to Central Park. Even though it was starting to warm up by New York standard, she couldn't help the chill that ravaged her body. She'd become used to the warmth of New Orleans. It was going to take some time for her blood to thicken.

"Sorry, I'm late," Kevin greeted her as he approached. "Javi does not know when to shut up."

"It's okay," she assured him, "We both know how he gets."

"You hungry?" he ushered her towards the nearest street vendor.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "Umbrella Room here we come."

"You never told me why you call hot dog stands that," he commented as they walked.

"Gram," Alexis said simply.

"Your Gram had a story for everything," he chuckled as he took her arm.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "So, any luck finding a place?"

"Still looking," Kevin shook his head, "There isn't much a single guy likely having to pay alimony can afford in Manhattan."

"Why don't you stay in Brooklyn?"

"Trying to get a little closer to the precinct," he replied, "But I'm likely going to have to expand my search soon if I can't find anything."

"Dad held onto Gram's place," Alexis said. "I can ask-"

"That's okay."

"No one is using it," she continued on, "It's just gathering dust. You'd probably be doing him a favor."

"I'll find something," Kevin assured her.

"Kevin," Alexis stopped walking. "Why wouldn't you want to stay there?"

"Think about it, Lex," he glanced around at the other people in the park, "How many times did we sneak into your grandmother's place to have some time together when she was off doing one of her productions?"

Alexis looked down at the ground, "That was a long time ago. You need a place to stay. This is a solution. Don't be stubborn."

"Oh, I'm being stubborn," he growled, "Isn't that the pot calling the kettle black?"

"I'm not being stubborn," Alexis said. "I'm not refusing to accept a perfectly reasonable solution to a present problem because of the past."

"I appreciate the offer," Kevin replied, "But I'm fine at my mom's place until I find one of my own."

"And now you're avoiding the situation," Alexis pointed. "Nice to know some things don't change."

"I'm avoiding the situation," he scoffed, "Are we really going to do this? I can toss stones too, Alexis."

"Kevin, why are you refusing to accept a solution to your problem?"

"Do you really think I could walk into that apartment and not see every time we were together on the couch or every meal we had at the kitchen counter? Do you think I could sleep in that bed without you?"

"I…ah…" she fumbled for a response.

"It hurts too damn much," he pressed on, "Being this close and not…it hurts, so much that I can barely breathe at times."

"This was a bad idea," Alexis backed away. "I should-"

"No," Kevin said. "We need to do this."

"No, we really don't," she shook her head, "We're not…I'm not ready for this."

"So you're just going to walk away, again," he challenged her.

"What do you want from me, Kevin?"

"How about an apology?" he hissed, "How about an explanation? How about the eight years that I lost with my son?"

"I am sorry for leaving and not telling you about Hunter," Alexis began. "But I didn't see another way."

"Another way," he scoffed, "Alexis, there was every other way. I offered to leave my wife for you. That wasn't enough. You just up and left on a whim."

"It wasn't a whim. I didn't have a choice."

"Yes, you did," he insisted, "I gave you a choice…Did you even think about how much it killed me when you left? Did you even care?"

"Of course I cared," she snapped, "Don't you dare dismiss my feelings."

"What feelings? I basically begged you to stay, and you still walked away. So, you tell me, Alexis, what feelings?"

"I loved you. I tried not to. I tried to avoid it. I tried not to think about it. I tried blocking you out, but every time I closed my eyes or let my mind drift there you were," she responded.

"You should have come home. We would have worked things out. We would have been a family."

"You would have lost everything else, _everyone_ else," Alexis told him. "Judges aren't particularly fond of men who sleep with younger women. How often do you think you would've seen Sarah Grace, if at all? Then there's Javi, Kate, and my dad. Let's start with my dad. You'd probably be dead right now or at least seriously injured. Kate would've helped my dad get away with it. Javi nearly lost his mind eight years after the fact, so I can only imagine what he would've done back then."

"I don't give a damn about any of that," he replied, "I lost eight years, Alexis…with you, with Hunter, and even now, I'm still losing time with him because you won't even tell him who I really am."

"Stop lying!" Alexis hissed. "Stop trying to tell us both that you wouldn't have cared about losing your daughter or your friends and their respect because you would've had me. I would've lost my dad too, and you know it."

"Fine, I'm the jerk in all of this. Everything is my fault. I pursued you when I knew I should have stayed away. I drove you all the way to New Orleans because you couldn't stand the sight of me any longer. I hurt you so much that you couldn't even think for a second how difficult it's been for me knowing that I've lost any chance I have to get to know my son, for my daughter to know her brother. Blame me for everything if that makes you feel better…Yes, it would have hurt having to tell your father and Javi and Beckett. They would have looked at me differently, but once they realized that we were in love and not throwing our lives away everything would have worked out."

"You're not a jerk, and I don't blame you for everything. Trust me, I know I shoulder some of the blame here. You're also not the only one who knew they should've stayed away," Alexis sat down on a nearby bench. "I knew what letting you into the loft that night could've led to, and I let you in anyway. I didn't ask you to leave or push you away when you kissed me."

"I need to know why you left, Alexis," he took a risk and reached for her hands, looking deep into her eyes, "You loved me. I know you did."

"I did," she nodded. "I still do."

"Then why did you leave?" he pressed.

"I can't," Alexis shook her head. "I can't do that to you."

"Do what?" he looked to her in confusion, "What aren't you telling me? What do you think you're protecting me from?"

"Kevin, you don't want me to answer," Alexis's eyes spilled over. "You don't know what it would change."

"I watched you walk away and it nearly killed me," Kevin told her. "I need to know why."

"No," Alexis shook her head. "You don't. Goodnight."

"Alexis, wait," he called out for her when she shuffled away as fast as she could.

She turned around, "Take your time. I'm not leaving again. I'm just going home."

He tossed around her last words to him over and over again, trying to make sense of it all.

-d-d-d-

Alexis shut the door to her apartment behind her. Just a few more moments and she could fall apart. First she had to get rid of Kate.

"Alexis, is everything alright?" Kate was taken aback by the forceful way Alexis shut the door.

"Yeah. Rude cabbie," Alexis rolled her eyes. "Guess I'm not used to it anymore."

"Happens all the time," Kate sympathized, "How was your night?"

"Okay. Thanks for staying with the kids tonight. I'm sure you'd rather be with your own kids."

"I enjoy playing grandmother when the occasion arises," Kate smiled.

"They couldn't ask for a better one," Alexis hugged Kate. "Do you want to sleep on the couch or head home?"

"I'll head home," Kate set down her magazine, "I told the kids that we could all go to the zoo this weekend. I hope that's okay with you."

"Fine with me, but you're the one who has to drag my dad out of the monkey house."

"He enjoys hanging out with his fellow primates," Kate laughed.

"Kate, why don't we invite Kevin and Sarah Grace?"

"Yeah?" Kate looked at her curiously, "I thought you and Kevin didn't really get along?"

"I'm trying to rectify that. We were friends once but lost touch, and he's one of Dad's best friends. I shouldn't make Dad feel like he has to choose which one of us to spend time with."

"There's no choice," Kate kissed the top of Alexis's head, "It's always going to be you, Bud."

Alexis's composure began to crumble. She hoped that Kate didn't notice, "Yeah, I know, but he's still someone you and Dad care a lot about."

"I'll extend the invite to Kevin," Kate grabbed her coat. "Are you working tomorrow?"

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I'll see you soon. By the way, does your dad still like musicals?"

"Yes, he does," Kate nodded, "Why do you ask?"

"He has been so great with Maggie that I want to do something nice for him and considering he won't let me pay him, I want to get him tickets to a show. Does he like the Four Seasons?"

"If you're talking 'Jersey Boys' he will love you more than he does me if you get him tickets," Kate chuckled, "He's seen it twice, and he says he can never see it enough."

"Good," Alexis smiled. "He can take-does he date?"

"Not that he's ever told me about," Kate frowned.

"That's too bad," Alexis frowned, "He's such a great guy. Any woman would be lucky to have him as their main squeeze."

"Yeah," Kate nodded. "He just never…"

"I get it," Alexis nodded. "Kids behave?"

"Of course," Kate confirmed, "Hunter needed help with a book report, and then he helped Cade with some math. Maggie just played with her dolls all night. She's so cute."

"My little princess," Alexis smiled. "Gram would've spoiled her rotten."

"Oh, yeah," Kate nodded, "More so than Castle already does. He's such a proud grandpa."

"He's a pretty proud dad too," Alexis reminded her. "When Ian got straight 'A's', Dad wouldn't shut up for a month."

"Pretty sure it was the same way back when you were Ian's age."

"Yeah," Alexis nodded.

"I'll see you soon, Bud," Kate hugged her stepdaughter and then grabbed her things.

"Thanks again for coming over on such short notice," Alexis walked her to the door.

"Of course," Kate nodded.

"Night," Alexis said before she shut the door behind Kate.

Alexis fell against the door with a sob. It had been the worst kind of night, and more so because it came out of nowhere. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep for a month.

She mechanically made sure the door was locked before she turned off the lights on her way to her room. She shut the door to her room before she went into her closet. Buried in the back was the box she'd found just before moving back to New York. She pulled the top off and cleared away the tissue paper. Right on top was a strip of photos, the companion to the ones Kevin had hidden in his desk at work.

Her and Kevin in happier times stared back at her. She wondered if they'd ever get back to that place.

 _You should have come home. We would have worked things out. We would have been a family._

If he'd only known how close she'd been to doing just that, but every time she'd thought about getting on a plane or calling him, she'd remembered what had driven her from New York in the first place.

Tears tumbled down Alexis's cheeks as she hugged herself around her middle. She had ruined everything.


	14. Chapter 13

Thank you for all the replies. Make sure you read the A.N. at the end.

-d-d-d-d-

"Hey, Lanie," Alexis says quietly. "You got a minute?"

"For you always," Lanie gave Alexis her undivided attention.

Alexis pulled herself up on an empty table and sighed, "Have you ever kept a secret from someone in order to preserve the way they see someone?"

"Run that by me again," Lanie frowned while she tried to translate Alexis's riddle.

"Javi told you, right?" Alexis asked before she continued. She knew that Kevin's best friend couldn't keep a secret like Alexis and Kevin to himself for long.

"Is this about you having an affair with Kevin and being concerned about how I see it?" Lanie asked after looking around to make sure they were truly alone, "Because you two are both consenting adults who I'm assuming made an informed decision. It's not like he hid the fact that he was married like some scum I've known."

"No, this is not about that. Though it's nice to tell someone and have them not lose their minds. I'm not exactly looking forward to the conversation I'll be having with my dad and Kate in the not too distant future. I'm talking about something I'm keeping from Kevin because I don't want to change his perception of someone."

"It's not Javi, is it?"

"No, not Javi," Alexis shook her head. "Initial reaction aside, he's been pretty cool about the whole thing."

"Alexis?" Lanie prompted her young protégé.

"You can't say anything to anyone and that includes to Javi."

"The flow of information usually only flows one way," Lanie assured her, "Javi is quite the gossip for a guy, especially in bed."

"Too much information," Alexis turned her head to make sure there were no cops heading into the morgue and then back to Lanie. "Right after I found out I was pregnant with Hunter, like literally two hours after the fact, Jenny shows up at the loft. She was very blunt. I either stop seeing her husband or she takes Sarah Grace and disappears."

"Wow, I always knew Jenny had a devious side, but wow, that's goes way beyond trying to hang onto her man."

"No matter what she's done, she's still his daughter's mother. How do I tell him she's the reason I left town without telling him that I was pregnant?"

"Wait, I'm confused," Lanie frowned, "He knows you had a son."

"I was talking about back then," Alexis replied.

"Hunter is-"

"Javi didn't tell you that part," Alexis realized.

"Javi didn't tell me that part," Lanie confirmed, "How could you just up and leave the man you loved when you were carrying his child?"

"I didn't want him to lose his daughter or you guys because of me. Then there's the part where I didn't want to see the look on my dad's face when I told him that one of his best friends was the father of his first grandchild."

"All are noble reasons," Lanie replied, "But Alexis, you were...you know what, the decision was already made, you had your reasons. Right or wrong, they were your reasons. You're asking for my advice on if you should now tell Kevin what Jenny did."

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "If it was you, what would you do?"

Lanie shook her head, "I don't know. I'd like to think I'd be brave enough to tell the truth."

"Come on, Lanie, I can't deal in the hypothetical anymore. This is real. Should I tell Kevin the truth or not?" Alexis asked.

"Answer this: Can you live with the secret anymore now that you're back to seeing him on a regular basis?"

"I should've made good on my threat to move to Hawaii," Alexis frowned.

"Well, you didn't. I think you have your answer."

"I need to tell him," Alexis nodded.

"You need to tell him," Lanie mimicked her friend.

"First I have to get him to talk to me."

"Good luck," Lanie went back to the lab.

Alexis pulled out her cell phone and waited a beat before dialing.

" _Ryan,"_ Kevin answered his desk phone without a thought.

"Hey, it's me. Don't hang up."

" _Lex, I really don't have time for anything right now,"_ he spoke quickly while Beckett and Castle were otherwise occupied, _"Can this wait?"_

"I want a do-over."

" _You really want to do all that over? Are you a sadist or something?"_

"I want a do-over in that we don't argue like we did. Last night wasn't what I had in mind when we agreed to meet in the park."

" _You want to try again?"_

"Yes, without the yelling and blaming. I'll even pay," Alexis offered.

" _Alright,"_ he nodded, _"Same time, same place?"_

"No, you pick the restaurant and come get me after your shift's over. I'll wait in Autopsy for you."

" _I'll see you then,"_ he smiled.

"Good," Alexis smiled. "Uh, Kev? Pick some place that we'll have some privacy. You were right last night. You do deserve to know why I left."

" _I have just the place,"_ he replied.

"I'll see you later," Alexis replied as a body was rolled into Autopsy. She signed for it without a second thought, "Looks like I've got some work to do. I'll talk to you then."

" _Alright. Bye,"_ Kevin hung up.

"Alexis, I just got called out for a D.B." Lanie told Alexis, "Can you handle things here?"

"Sure, go," Alexis nodded. "Just don't forget to call Javi and let him know you can't have lunch with him."

"Thanks for the reminder," Lanie dug out her phone on the way out.

"And I owe you a bear claw," she called.

"You're darn right you do," Lanie replied just before the doors closed behind her.

Alexis smiled as she turned to the body she'd pulled that morning to start her tests.

-d-d-d-

"Hey, Alexis, we hear you have something on the dead vic that was brought in," Kevin and Javier entered the morgue.

"Did you get an ID?" Javier asked.

"No, not yet, but I can tell you that you're looking for a special kind of pervert with this guy," Alexis turned around. "The sexual assault was post mortem."

"This job never fails to turn your stomach," Kevin frowned when the autopsy phone rang.

Alexis went to answer it, "Dr. LaSalle."

"Where you taking her tonight?" Javier asked Kevin quietly.

"The same place where I took her for our first night out eight years ago," Kevin replied.

"Nice," Javier nodded. "You nervous?"

"About to lose my lunch," Kevin nodded.

"Never seen you this nervous before," Javi gave a good chuckle, "Not even with Jenny."

Anything Kevin would have said was lost when Alexis hung up the phone and turned to the detectives, "Hey guys, can you help security clear out reception? The press keeps trying to get in because one of the bodies we got earlier today. It should take about the same amount of time for me to do a trace exam on the little old lady we got and get dressed. Then we can go."

"Sure, we'll be back in a few," Kevin nodded.

"Thank you," Alexis gave them a grateful smile.

Alexis returned to her work. She could hear the chaos from outside filter in. Suddenly she felt a sharp pain. It brought her to her knees. Last thing she remembered before the pain took over was seeing the blood pooling on the floor.

-d-d-d-

"Have you decided on any post date activity?" Javier asked while he walked Kevin back to autopsy after chasing out the photographers.

"Beckett's right. You're still fourteen sometimes."

"I am what I am," Javi laughed, "So how about it?"

"We're just having dinner as friends," Kevin responded, "Her husband just died for crying out loud."

"You could still take her for a walk or a carriage ride," Javier pointed out. "Come on. Make a move."

"Not in the cards right now," Kevin shook his head as they walked through the doors.

"Whatever. Okay, Doc. Time's up. Get out here and put this man out of his misery."

Kevin laughed and then looked around him. Something wasn't right. There was broken glass and medical instruments on the floor.

"Lex?" he called out.

"Alexis," Javier's voice was harder.

They walked further into the morgue and the sight before them stopped Kevin's heart. Alexis was lying in a pool of blood, her blood. She was barely aware of what was going on around her. He fell to his knees at her side, "Lex! Oh my god, Lex, what happened?"

"Check her pulse," Javier did a cursory inspection of the area while he dialed 9-1-1.

"Stay with me, Lex," Kevin pleaded with her. He did what he could to stanch the bleeding.

"This is Detective Javier Esposito. I need EMS and the police at the New York City Morgue," Javier was saying. "I have a stabbing victim. Vic is in her late twenties, apparent stab wounds to the torso, lost a lot of blood, pulse is weak and thready."

"Lex, if you can hear me, I love you," Kevin said into her ear as he kept pressure on her side.

Alexis held onto those words and tried to fight the darkness that threatened to take her.

-d-d-

"Stay with me, Babe," Kevin brought her hand to his lips as the ambulance pulled up to the Emergency Room. There had been moments in which she's squeezed his hand on the ride, seeming to react to what he was saying.

He ran alongside the gurney as the medics gave the rundown to the doctors still hanging onto her hand and praying to God that he wasn't about to lose her just as he'd found her again.

"I'm sorry, Sir, you can't go any further," a nurse stopped him.

"I need to go with her in case she's able to identify her assailant," Kevin tried to rationalize his way into the room. He flashed his badge to sell the story.

"I'm sorry, you'll have to wait until the doctors finish assessing her condition."

"No, you don't understand," Kevin reluctantly had to let go of Alexis's hand, "There is a very dangerous person on the loose. We need to find whoever it is before they do it again."

"You want to catch the guy. I want the girl to live. You choose," the nurse gave him a curt response.

"Alexis," he responded, "Her name is Alexis."

The nurse took a better look at the man before her. She'd seen the look in the officer's eyes before, "I want Alexis to live, and I think you do, too. We both have our jobs to do. I'll come let you know when you can see her. The chapel is up on four if you're interested."

"Thank you," Kevin nodded.

He looked to his hands to see them covered in blood. They began shaking.

He slowly paced the floor, his hands clasped together to keep them from shaking. Why now? Why was this happening now?

"Not yet, Chris," he whispered as he looked up. "You hear me? Not yet."

"Excuse me," the nurse returned to the waiting room, "Do you know her emergency contact?"

"Her father," Kevin nodded. "Richard Castle. My partner was calling him."

"We're going to need his consent for surgery," the nurse replied, "Do you have his number?"

"Yeah," he got out his phone and found the number. Rattling it off he looked up, "How is she?"

"It's too soon to know."

"She's going to need surgery though?"

"Yes," the nurse rushed back into the trauma room.

Kevin leaned against the wall and sank to the floor. He could lose her. This could be it.

He swallowed hard when he began remembering how it all began.

-x-x-x-x-x-

A few of you have asked for flashbacks and we are going to provide them. We have several of them planned. When we reach 100 replies, you get the first one. Thanks for reading.


	15. Flashback: It Started Over Coffee

"Hey Lanie, isn't that Kevin?" Alexis nodded to the man paying for his drink at the counter.

"Yeah," Lanie turned towards where Alexis was pointing, "Thought he would have had his case all wrapped up and was heading home. It hit pretty close to home this time."

"His brother-in-law, right? I heard Dad and Kate talking about it," Alexis admitted.

"Yeah," Lanie observed him for a moment, "He looks pretty down. We should cheer him up."

"Good idea," Alexis got up and walked over. "Come here often, Detective?"

"Hey, Alexis, Lanie," he gave an attempt at a smile.

"You alright, Ryan?" Lanie patted his shoulder.

"Sure," Kevin nodded.

"Judges?" Alexis looked at Lanie to have her rate Kevin's mood.

"Not even close," Lanie shook her head. "Come sit with us."

"I'm good, really," Kevin protested as Lanie linked her arm with his and pulled him over to the table she and Alexis were sitting.

"You're a bad liar, Ryan," Alexis shook her head.

"So I've been told," Kevin gave in and followed them along.

Alexis smiled as she sat down and leaned back in her chair, "So, what are you doing here?"

"Getting coffee," he held up his cup.

"Okay, let's try this again," Lanie took over. "Why are you here and not home with your wife and that cute little girl of yours?"

"Needed to clear my head before I go home," he replied.

"Everything alright with your sister and her husband?" Alexis asked.

"I think they'll be okay, yeah," Kevin nodded.

"That's great," Alexis smiled.

"Yeah," he continued to nod.

"That's not great?" she prodded.

"No, it is," Kevin covered.

"What's wrong?" Lanie asked.

"It's nothing," Kevin shook his head. "It's just hard when family's involved."

"Of course," Alexis nodded.

"Oh damn, I have to go," Lanie realized after a quick glance at her watch. "Alexis, any more questions, you have my number, right?"

"I'll call you," Alexis promised.

"And you," Lanie pointed to Kevin, "Cheer up, will you? You're a lot more handsome when you smile."

"That's a good tip, Lanie," he snorted, "I'll work on it."

"See you both later," Lanie smiled.

Once she was gone, Kevin looked at Alexis, "You don't have to stay. I'm good."

"Trying to get rid of me?"

"I'm sure you have other things to do," he replied.

"Not really," Alexis shook her head. "So, unless you want me to leave so you can mope in silence I'm happy to stay and talk."

"Things are just so up in the air right now."

"Is this about your sister?"

"Gwen, no," Kevin shook his head. "No, her marriage is as solid as granite. Mine on the other hand has been crashing and burning for a long time."

"How come?" she asked.

"Right before we found out Sarah Grace was on the way I had to go undercover. It was a case that dated back to my narco days," Kevin started.

"Right, the woman who walked right up to you and kissed you in full view of Jenny and half the precinct," Alexis nodded. "I remember my dad talking about it."

"Yeah, Jenny never really forgave me for not telling her about it."

"Did you even know her back then?" Alexis frowned.

"No," Kevin shook his head.

"Then what's the problem?"

"There's more," Kevin shook his head. "Sometimes I wonder if we should've even gotten married."

"But you and Jenny have always seemed so perfect for each other," Alexis replied.

"Looks can be deceiving."

"What happened?"

"That actress Natalie Rhodes?"

"The one who wanted to play Nikki Heat," Alexis nodded.

"She's kind of on a list of mine, and I never told Jenny she was observing Beckett. She found out right after she found out I didn't play darts with Javi one night. She thought," Kevin motioned.

"Oh," Alexis said.

"After that things went sideways," he replied, "I still proposed because I thought we would get back on track quickly, but the problem just got pushed under the rug with all the wedding plans that followed."

"My dad was smiling when he told me about that day. He said you two looked so happy."

"She's always been quite the little actress."

"But you're a bad liar," Alexis pointed out.

"I thought it all was real," he replied.

"It can't all have been an act on Jenny's part. If it was, I doubt she'd want to tie herself to you with a child."

"Maybe it wasn't all an act," he conceded, "But there were a lot more bad moments than good after we said our 'I do's."

"I'm sorry, Kevin. Have you ever talked to my dad about this? If anyone knows what it is to live with someone who's putting on an act it's him," Alexis said before looking horrified, "I really just said that. I'm sorry."

"No, you're right," he replied, "It is an act. A pretty good one actually."

"What brought about this sudden realization?"

"Gwen opened the door and just hugged Frank today. No blame, nothing," Kevin shook his head. "I don't know that Jenny would do that."

"Maybe you should have a talk with her."

"And say what? If my life exploded would you stand by me or cut and run?"

"Yeah, why not?" Alexis asked, "If you can't have an open and honest conversation with your wife, then who can you be honest with?"

"I feel like I've been more honest with you in the last ten minutes than I have in the last year with Jenny."

"Then it's time to get honest," Alexis told him.

Kevin studied Alexis for a moment, remembering the first time they'd met.

"What's that look?" Alexis recognized the sudden shift in his thoughts.

"I'm just thinking," Kevin shook his head. "We've known each other for a while."

"Yeah, since I was fifteen," she laughed, "God, I was so awkward back then."

"No," Kevin shook his head. "You were better than me. You were better than a lot of people even then."

"Well, I felt awkward," she replied.

"You hid it well," he assured her.

"Thanks. You were in the background the first night Kate came to talk to my dad. You and Javi: Beckett's Honor Guard," she teased.

"Not much has changed over the years," he replied.

"I think it's nice. She and my dad think of you as brothers," Alexis nodded.

"Yeah, they're family to me too."

"Is your brother-in-law going to be okay?"

"Yeah, I think so," Kevin nodded, "But time will tell."

"And what about you?" Alexis asked.

"Time will tell there too," he sighed.

"If you ever want to talk," she offered, "I'm around to listen."

"Thanks, I appreciate it," Kevin nodded.

"Do you have a couple of business cards?" Alexis asked.

"Yeah," he fumbled in his coat to produce the requested cards. "What do you need these for?"

"Give me a sec," Alexis grabbed a pen from her purse and wrote on the back of one while the other went into her purse. "If you ever want to have coffee, let me know."

"Thanks for the ear," he tucked her number into his suit coat pocket.

"I'll be seeing you, Detective," Alexis left with a smile.

"Yeah," he watched her leave.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Thanks for all the replies. :) I hope you liked the first flashback. With any luck we will post another one in the next day or so. Keep up the replies.


	16. Flashback: A Seed is Planted

"Thanks," Alexis said to the bartender as she took her drink and turned to scan the room. It was fun to see all these writers in the same room.

"I hope you were carded before the bartender poured you that drink," Kevin ambled up next to her.

"Put away the badge, Detective," Alexis teased. "Just because you can't have more than a beer tonight doesn't mean the rest of us can't have some fun."

"Lanie said that you've declared a major," Kevin replied, "Congrats on that."

"Thanks," she smiled before she shot a look at their table. Jenny was talking to Martha and both were smiling, but Martha's smile was strained. Her grandmother was better at seeing through acts when they came from women.

"How's it going with you and Jenny after we had that coffee last month?" Alexis asked.

Kevin followed Alexis's eye line to Jenny and Martha, "Buy me a drink?"

"That good, huh?"

"I've tried to talk, but she shuts me down before I can even start," he explained. "It's easier to have an emotional conversation with Javi than it is my wife."

Alexis frowned and looked at Jenny again. The blonde was laughing at something Tori was saying. Alexis rolled her eyes and turned to face Kevin, "Is there anything I can do?"

"Not much to do," Kevin shrugged, "Just grin and bear it, I guess."

"And have a drink on me," Alexis got the bartender's attention to order Kevin a drink.

"Scotch, on the rocks," Kevin told the man.

"Cheers," Alexis held up her drink and clinked it with Kevin's. "So, talk."

"About?"

"Anything but Jenny," Alexis smiled. "How's Gwen? How's Frank? How are your folks? Tell me about Sarah Grace."

"She's such a great little girl," his eyes brightened when he pulled out a recent photo of the two of them taken in the park.

"How old is she now?" Alexis took the photo and studied it.

"She's eighteen months," Kevin smiled.

"That's when the fun is beginning. She's walking and talking and following you all around the house," Alexis smiled, "And I bet she has her daddy wrapped around her little finger."

"Yeah," Kevin admitted with a grin. "My dad was the same way with all my sisters."

"Are they older or younger than you?" Alexis asked.

"Older. I'm the youngest," Kevin nodded.

"Kept going until they had that boy, huh?" she teased.

"Something like that," he chuckled.

"It must be nice to have siblings," Alexis commented. "I wonder if I'll get that chance."

"You never know," Kevin replied, "I think Kate's warming up to the idea of kids."

"I hope so. I know my dad loves me-"

"He adores you," Kevin corrected. "He told me once right before Sarah Grace was born, that you were the best thing he'd ever done in life."

"Yeah, that sounds like him," she turned towards her father, "And I know that no matter what, I'm always going to be his little girl. I'm okay with him and Kate having more kids."

"Think they'll have a boy?"

"I think he'd love that," Alexis smiled. "Though I know Beckett would love having a girl to name after her mom."

"They would have to have more than one," Kevin reminded her.

"Oh right, the future case. They have three kids?"

"Beckett might run for State Senator," Kevin pointed out. "They're on their way."

"Dad as a politician's husband," Alexis mused, "Don't know that I'll believe that until I see it."

"If she does, we'll miss her," Kevin noted.

"Oh please. You and Javi will be in charge of her security, and you know it," Alexis giggled.

"Hope that gig pays better than my current one," he chuckled.

"Any more side gigs in the future?"

"No, I'm stepping back from that for a while."

"Let the dust settle," Alexis nodded. "Sounds like a good idea."

"Yeah, I want to be around for Sarah Grace," he finally tucked his photo back into his pocket, "She deserves a father that is present in her life, not always working."

"You're a good man, Charlie Brown," Alexis smiled.

"Why thank you, Lucy," he smiled back before he turned serious, "Thanks for another pep talk. It's nice having someone listen and not judge me."

"Anytime," Alexis smiled. "Looks like they're about to give Dad his due. We better sit down."

"By the way, you look great this evening," Kevin's hand fell to the small of her back as he guided her back to their assigned table.

"Thanks. You clean up pretty nicely, too, Kevin," Alexis smiled before she retook her seat next to Martha and Kevin sat across the table next to Jenny.

Kevin looked towards his hand once he was seated. He could have sworn he felt an electric current pass between him and Alexis on the short walk from the bar.

Alexis shot him a small smile before she turned her attention to Michael Connelly as he took the stage to present the award to her dad. She could swear she still felt Kevin's hand on her back.

-d-d-d-d-d-

I am so sorry. I wanted to post this yesterday but my net service went out on me. I want to thank everyone who replied. Keep it up.


	17. Flashback: Winds of Change

"You know what, Jenny, fine. I'm leaving," Kevin stormed out of the apartment and made his way down the hall.

"Good," Jenny slammed the door after him.

Kevin opted for the stairs and ran down them to the lobby of his building. He was out on the street in the early evening with the wind whipping past him.

Kevin began walking along the street, trying to calm himself down, but it was no use. The argument he'd had with Jenny kept replaying in his head, and he kept getting worked up.

Without realizing it he took out his phone and dialed a number he was using a lot lately.

" _Hello?"_

"Hey, it's me," Kevin replied, "Can we meet somewhere? I need someone to talk to."

" _My grandmother is out of town, so I'm apartment sitting. We won't be interrupted if we use her place,"_ Alexis smiled.

"Yeah, that works," Kevin stated, "I'll see you in twenty?"

" _Yeah,"_ Alexis agreed.

-d-d-d-

Kevin knocked on the door and a moment later it opened.

"Hey," Alexis smiled at him.

"Hey," he replied, "Thanks for meeting me. I just needed someone to talk to."

"No problem," she moved aside to let him in. "You look windblown. It must be kicking up out there."

"Almost flew away," he nodded as he stepped into the apartment, "Good think I didn't have an umbrella. Would have blown away like all those nannies did in _Mary Poppins_."

Alexis giggled while shutting the door, "You're just in time. I hope you're hungry."

"I thought I smelled Chinese food," he smiled.

"So what's up?" Alexis passed him a cartoon of fried rice.

Kevin took a seat at the counter and dished out the rice onto a plate before he took another container of Teriyaki beef, "Just a bad fight. I needed some space from Jenny."

"How bad?"

"I was ready to put my fist through a wall."

"Would that have hurt more or less than putting it through a mirror?"

"Yeah, wouldn't want to go through that again," he frowned at the memory.

"You all healed up?" Alexis peered at his hand.

"Oh, yeah," he nodded while flexing his hand, "That was months ago."

"So, what was this fight about?"

"Who knows anymore," he shrugged.

"Kev," Alexis put her hand over his, "What's going on? How bad is it getting with you guys?"

"Pretty bad," he sighed, "I just never know what mood she's going to be in when I get home. Any innocent thing can set her off."

"Have you guys seen anyone?"

"We've tried the therapist route," he nodded, "Apparently everything is my fault."

"I refuse to believe that a licensed professional actually said that to you," Alexis frowned.

"She didn't," Kevin responded, "Jenny did."

"I hope you don't believe her," Alexis frowned.

"It can't all be my fault," he shrugged, "I mean, I'm trying. I really am. I just don't know what she wants anymore…Actually, I do. She wants me to find a desk job."

"And that's going to magically fix everything?" Alexis asked skeptically.

"Apparently," Kevin nodded.

"She knew she was marrying a cop. It's not like you were a lawyer or something when you met, and then you changed mid-course. She knew what she was getting."

"I thought so," he nodded, "It wasn't so bad when she was working, but now that she's not, she says that she waits around the house all day waiting for a phone call that I've been shot, like shootouts are frequent occurrences."

"Well, you and Javi did get shot at after a car rammed into you that one time," Alexis nodded.

"Yeah, but that's not an everyday occurrence," he grumbled.

"I know," Alexis nodded, "I'm on your side. Do you know how tonight's fight started?"

"I came home, locked up my gun and badge, and then we were off," Kevin replied.

"Okay, at the risk of being a traitor to my gender, does she have PMS?"

"For three months straight?" he challenged her, "It's like that nearly every night. The only nights it's not like that are the nights that I stay late at the precinct, and she's asleep before I get home."

"Maybe you should try surprising her with flowers," Alexis suggested.

"Yeah, I tried that. She threw them and the vase they were in at me a few nights later," Kevin confessed. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore, Lex."

Alexis's jaw dropped at his words. "Kev, that's not okay."

"I know, but she's my wife," he nodded, "What am I supposed to do?"

"Have you considered a separation? Just take some time to calm down and think about what it is you both want?"

"Why do you think the vase was launched in my direction?" he asked, "I suggested that maybe I stay at my parent's for a week to give her some time alone. She said she's alone enough as it is."

"I'm sorry, Kevin," she frowned, "I don't know what to tell you."

"I'm not looking for you to solve my problems, Alexis," Kevin assured her. "I just want to talk without judgment."

"You've got it," Alexis smiled. She looked up when she heard wind rattle the windows. "It's picking up out there."

The lights flickered right on cue.

"I hope the electricity doesn't go out," he noted.

"Maybe we should think about getting out of here before it does," Alexis moved to start putting the food into bags. "Do you want to take any of this-"

The lights flickered again and then went out.

"Guess that answers that," Kevin frowned.

"Great," Alexis opened her phone and dialed. "Hey Dad, it's me. I'm still at Gram's, and the lights went out. I'm not doing the stairs in a blackout, so I'm just gonna sleep here again tonight. I'll see you in the morning. Love you. Bye."

"Voicemail?"

"Yeah, he and Kate are probably in the shower," Alexis smiled.

"Too much information," he winced.

"Shouldn't you call Jenny?"

"And say what? I'm spending the night in an apartment with my best friend's daughter in the middle of a blackout?"

"Maybe not that exactly," Alexis laughed, "Maybe just that you've been caught in a blackout and can't get home until the power comes back on."

"I think if I call her, it's just going to lead to another argument."

"What happens if you just don't come home tonight?"

"She'll probably jump for joy," he frowned.

Alexis squeezed his hand, "I hate that it's like that for you. You deserve better."

"Thanks," he nodded.

"Might as well eat this food," Alexis pulled the cartoons of food out of the bag, "Dig in."

Kevin smiled as they ate and talked in the dwindling light.

"I'm gonna find some candles," Alexis said. "Gram probably has some."

"Okay, I'll clean up," Kevin nodded.

"Thanks. At the risk of nagging, you should call Jenny and just let her know you're going to wait out the blackout before you head home," Alexis advised.

"Yeah, you're probably right," he sighed heavily.

"Keep it simple," Alexis smiled.

"If only that works," he pulled out his phone and hit Jenny's number.

" _Hello?"_

"Hey, it's me," he began, "I'm sorry for storming out like I did."

" _Where are you?"_

"A friend's," Kevin said. "I'm gonna wait out the blackout. I don't really want to deal with the stairs in the dark."

" _A friend's,"_ Jenny snorted in disbelief, _"Kevin, are you having an affair?"_

"What?" Kevin exclaimed, "Where would you even get an idea like that?"

" _Okay then who's the friend?"_

"Martha Rodgers," Kevin said. "You remember her, right? Castle's mother?"

" _You expect me to believe that you went to talk to that woman?"_ Kevin could practically hear Jenny rolling her eyes.

"No, I didn't. I went to talk to her granddaughter," Kevin said.

" _Alexis?"_ Jenny replied, _"That's almost as unbelievable as going to see Martha."_

"I'll be home as soon as I can," he tried to assure her.

" _Whatever,"_ Jenny hung up.

"Love you, too," Kevin said.

"Went that well, huh?" Alexis returned with her arms loaded down with candles.

"Yeah," Kevin said. "You need some help?"

"No, but if you could go into the drawer next to the sink and grab a matchbook?"

Kevin grabbed the matches while Alexis spread the candles around the apartment strategically to get the most light out of them possible.

"There," Alexis lit the last candle. "Perfect. Now we can die in a wax fire."

"Not funny," Kevin mumbled.

"Right. Sorry," Alexis frowned.

"It's okay," Kevin tried to reassure her.

"Sorry, I tend to have my dad's foot in mouth disease sometimes," Alexis apologized again.

"It's really okay," he replied.

"I can't even imagine how horrible that must have been for you and Javi," Alexis replied, "If it had been me, I probably would have locked myself up in my dad's loft and never left."

"It was not what I imagined for the day my child was born," Kevin nodded.

Alexis sat down on the floor and leaned against the couch, "You wanna talk about it?"

"Not really," he shook his head.

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "You gonna stand there all night or sit down?"

"Yeah, good point," Kevin took a seat next to Alexis on the sofa.

They sat in silence for a few moments, just listening to the wind howling outside.

Alexis's eyes started to get heavy after a while and her head tilted to the side, resting on Kevin's shoulder.

"Tired, Castle?" he asked.

"Shh, no talking," Alexis mumbled.

"You falling asleep on me?"

"Yeah, sorry," Alexis sat upright suddenly upon realizing how inappropriate her action was.

"It's okay," Kevin said. "I lean on you all the time."

Alexis smiled in reply.

"So what's been going on with you lately?" he asked.

"Just getting ready for my last year of school," Alexis smiled. "Nothing as dramatic as what you're going through."

"Have you picked a major yet?"

"Thinking of pre-med," Alexis admitted. "I really liked working with Lanie."

"I know that Lanie was extremely impressed."

"Thanks," Alexis brought her legs up and rested her heels on the edge of the sofa. "I think we're stuck here for the night."

"Yeah, probably," he listened to the winds whip around some more.

"You can take the bed," Alexis said as she grabbed a blanket from the back of the couch.

"Well that seems ridiculous," he replied, "I'll take the couch. You take the bed."

"I can't sleep in that bed," Alexis shook her head. "The woman on the other side of the wall keeps auditioning husbands."

"So, you want me to sleep there?"

"I figure you're a heavier sleeper than I am."

"Hate to break it to you," he shook his head, "I'm not."

Alexis slid onto the floor and curled up.

Kevin frowned, "What are you doing?"

"You're the guest."

"I'm not sleeping on the couch while you sleep on the floor," he slid down next to her, "Get your butt up on that couch."

"No," she shook her head. "Night."

"Seriously, Alexis, get up there," he motioned for her to get back on the sofa.

"No," she frowned at him.

"Fine, then neither of us are going to sleep up there," Kevin reached for one of the throw pillows and stuffed it under his head.

"You're stubborn," Alexis murmured.

"So are you," Kevin told her.

"Night, Kevin," she reached for her own pillow.

"Night," he smiled.

Alexis's eyes opened to slits and she winced, the lights were bright.

Somewhere during the night the pillow she'd been using had been cast aside and she was using Kevin's shoulder as a pillow.

As she shifted slightly, she realized that Kevin's arm was resting around her waist.

Kevin's alarm on his phone went off, which startled them both into consciousness.

"Ow," Kevin said as he shifted. He looked over at the woman beside him. It'd been a long time since he'd woken up to anyone but Jenny.

"What time is it?" Alexis looked around, trying to get her bearings.

"Six-thirty," Kevin said. "That's what my alarm is set for."

Alexis groaned as she stretched out her muscles.

"I guess we've got power again," Kevin groaned as he sat up. "Why didn't I sleep on the couch?"

"Because you're stubborn," Alexis reminded him.

"Isn't that the pot calling the kettle black," he replied.

"I'll make some coffee," Alexis rose to her feet quickly.

"Thanks," Kevin nodded. "Bathroom?"

Alexis pointed, "Through my grandma's bedroom."

Kevin walked off while Alexis went to start the machine.

He came back a few moments later with a disturbed look on his face.

"What's wrong?"

"Either she never went to sleep or your grandmother's neighbor gets up very early. Do you know the pictures on the wall in the bedroom are crooked?"

"Again," Alexis frowned, "Damn, I thought I had them all straightened out."

"We sure the lady next door isn't a lady of the evening?"

"Huh, that would explain a few things," Alexis nodded.

"Want me to have it checked out?"

"Sure, why not?"

"I'll make some calls when I get to the precinct," Kevin assured her when she handed him a cup of fresh brewed coffee.

"Speaking of, you should get going. You have to change before you go in or if you want, I think Gram has some men's shirts."

"No, I'll head home," Kevin shook off the suggestion after taking several sips of the coffee she'd made.

"Okay," Alexis smiled as she leaned forward to grab her cell phone and the same time Kevin did to put his coffee down.

He ended up millimeters from her lips.

He pulled back abruptly with a clearing of his throat.

Alexis looked at him with a small smile as she checked her phone.

"I'd better go," Kevin took one more glance in her direction, "Thanks for listening last night."

"Of course," Alexis smiled. "Anytime. Have a good day."

"Yeah, you too," Kevin went to the door and left.

-d-d-d-d-

For those of you who are wondering, we have 11 more of these planned.

Thanks to everyone who replied. Keep it up.


	18. Flashback: Fireworks

Thanks for the replies and for reading.

=d=d=d=d=

Alexis put down a stack of burgers next to the grill and greeted the new chef, "What did you do with my dad, Javi?"

"Chased him away so that we wouldn't end up eating charcoal bricks," Javier replied.

"Thank you," she whispered. "And never tell him I said that."

"There's a price for my silence," he smiled.

"How dark do you like your beer?"

"I'm not interested in those dark beers like the Irishman over there," Javier responded, "Bring me a Corona."

"You got it," Alexis spared a glance at Kevin who was currently chasing after a fast moving Sarah Grace. She scanned the crowd for Jenny who was lying on a chaise completely disinterested in everything around her, including her toddling daughter. "Unbelievable.

"Whoa, look at you, Little Lady," Alexis cut Sarah Grace off before she pushed herself out of the gate to the beach before Kevin could catch up to her, "Where do you think you're going without your Daddy?"

Sarah Grace blew a raspberry at the redhead who had ruined her fun and squirmed.

"Uh-uh," Alexis shook her head before she looked at the approaching Kevin, "Lose something?"

"Thanks for catching her," Kevin took Sarah Grace from Alexis's arms. "I turned around for two seconds, and she was off like a shot."

"Future track star on your hands," Alexis pulled a Corona out of a cooler and grabbed a passing Martha, "Gram, can you give this to Espo?"

"Sure, Dear," Martha snatched up the beer.

"And do not hit on him," Alexis said quietly.

"There's nothing wrong with some harmless flirting," Martha gave a coy smile.

Alexis scrunched her face up and shook her head as Martha walked towards Esposito, "I swear, sometimes I think I'm adopted."

"Javi will never see what's coming," Kevin chuckled while Sarah Grace squirmed away in his arms. She wanted to play in the sand, and he was in her way.

"I can take her to the beach for a while if you want to relax," Alexis offered.

"You don't have to do that," Kevin shook off her offer.

"I'm a good babysitter. Just ask my dad."

Kevin laughed, "Well, Beckett's got that job now. Look, it's a party. Have some fun."

"I'm kind of afraid to go near any of the uniforms. Karpowski's brother tried talking to me and stuttered for five minutes before walking away. Sarah Grace is much better company."

"Yeah, alright," he conceded, "What do you say, Sarah Grace? Do you want to play in the sand with Alexis?"

Sarah Grace went willingly to Alexis who smiled at Kevin, "We won't be far. I promise."

"Thanks, Alexis," he smiled and helped himself to a beer.

"Come on, Sarah Grace," Alexis carried Kevin's daughter towards the beach, "I have some old sand toys that will make our day more fun."

"Where's our daughter?" Jenny asked her husband when he took a seat in the chair next to her.

"With Alexis on the beach," Kevin said quietly.

"Are you sure she can be trusted with our daughter?" Jenny pulled away her sunglasses and gave Kevin a stern look.

"Would you rather I go with them?" he asked.

"I'd rather you not hand Sarah Grace off to the first available person you can find."

"No, that's your job," Kevin rose from his chair quickly and bolted for the gate Alexis had just gone through.

He heard Alexis laughing just after his feet hit the sand. He looked over and saw Sarah Grace dumping sand on Alexis's legs.

"Oh, look who's coming to join us," Alexis pointed the little girl towards her father.

"Daddy!" the toddler squealed with excitement.

"Hey Pumpkin," Kevin fell to his knees beside the girls. "You covering Alexis with sand?"

"Sand on Lex," Sarah Grace clapped.

"I have a better idea," Alexis gave a mischievous grin, "How about we cover Daddy in sand?"

"No," Kevin moved to a crouching position in order to escape, but Alexis had fast hands and pulled his ankle so he landed on his butt. Sarah Grace climbed on top of him.

Kevin was laughing so hard he was nearly in tears. He couldn't remember the last time he'd truly felt this happy.

"I would like to state that two against one is unfair," Kevin got out.

Alexis laughed as she watched Sarah Grace dump small handfuls of sand on Kevin's chest, "I wish I had a camera."

Kevin pulled his phone from his shorts pocket and tossed it in her direction quickly. He wanted this moment captured as much as she did.

Alexis quickly snapped a few shots and reclined on her elbows, watching father and child play.

It was good to see him at ease, especially considering the tension that had been on his face when he and Jenny had arrived.

"Xis, help," Sarah Grace suddenly tugged on Alexis's hand to get her attention.

"Ah," Alexis ended up on her back as Sarah Grace had caught her off guard when she pulled at her hand.

It was Kevin's turn to watch the pair when Alexis retaliated by giving the little girl a good tickle.

He couldn't resist taking a few pictures of his own while Sarah Grace shrieked with laughter.

Alexis finally let the girl go as she sat up, sand slipping from her hair.

"You've got sand on your cheek," Kevin didn't think twice about brushing the sand off Alexis's cheek until he felt a current charge through him.

Alexis's eyes widened as she pulled back, "Uh, t-thank you."

"Sorry," he pulled away quickly like he'd been burned.

"For what? Cleaning me up? I'd say you owed me, considering I got sand on me by playing with your daughter," Alexis covered.

"Right," Kevin accepted her cover up attempt.

"And you, you little monster," Alexis snagged Sarah Grace. "Let's go get our feet wet."

Sarah Grace took Alexis's hand and ran towards the surf as fast as her little legs would carry her.

Kevin watched them go before he looked at the sand. What the hell was going on?

"Ryan, Castle, burgers are ready," Javi called towards them from the other side of the fence.

Alexis waved from the shoreline and scooped up Sarah Grace to carry her up.

Kevin waited until Alexis and Sarah Grace had caught up to him before he made his way back to Castle's house. The party was in full swing and officers were lined up to get at the food.

"I'm gonna go see if Kate needs any help," Alexis returned Sarah Grace to Kevin's arms and took off towards the kitchen.

"Hope you're hungry, Partner," Javi opened the gate for Kevin and prodded him towards the line for the food. "I'll take the little monster while you get food."

"Thanks," Kevin handed Sarah Grace to Javier and went to grab some food. He got there at the same time Alexis was putting down a bowl of pasta salad.

She was curiously avoiding eye contact as she set the bowl down and turned away abruptly.

"Alexis?" Kevin called as she walked away.

Alexis chose not the hear him and continued walking.

"Did you piss off my girl?" Lanie asked from his side.

"Not that I know of," Kevin responded.

"Don't just watch her go, apologize," Lanie nudged him, "I don't want my summer intern to be upset when she comes to work on Monday."

"Yeah," Kevin followed Alexis into the house and looked around. The house was empty, but Kevin saw a flash of red turn the corner into the living room.

He called out for her a second time, but she continued on like she hadn't heard him.

He followed again and finally caught up with her in the front room, "Hey."

"Hey," she turned towards him with a shy reply.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked.

"No, why?"

"You bolted from me before."

"I thought I heard my phone ring," she made up a weak excuse.

"You're as bad a liar as I am," he observed.

"Yeah, I am," she nodded and held out her wrists to him, "Arrest me."

"Alexis," Kevin gave her a look. "Did I piss you off?"

"No," she shook her head quickly, "You didn't do anything. I promise. It's me. It's my stuff. I'll deal."

"You can talk to me if you want," Kevin offered.

"No, I really can't," she shook off his offer.

"It's only fair," he reminded her, "You've been there for me."

"It's just stupid kid stuff," Alexis shook her head. "We should get back out there."

"Are you sure?" he hesitated.

"Yes, I'm fine," Alexis assured him.

"If you want to talk," he started.

"I know where you are," Alexis smiled.

"Standing offer, day or night," he stated as he let her walk off.

"I know," she said over her shoulder.


	19. Flashback: Partings

Since you guys gave us a good number of replies, here's another flashback.

0d0d0d0d

Alexis's legs were bent as she leaned against the wall of the coffee shop she was currently reading in. She had just reached out to grab a pen when someone set a cup of iced coffee down on the table.

"I didn't-" she looked up to see Kevin standing before her.

"Hey, Red," Kevin gave her a cocky grin.

"What are you doing here?" Alexis looked around, expecting to see Esposito at his side. The partners always appeared to be attached at the hip during working hours, but he was nowhere in sight.

"Needed a cup of coffee," Kevin motioned towards the empty chair next to her, "This seat taken?"

"And if I say yes," Alexis looked back at her book.

"Then I'll take my coffee back to the precinct," he cleared his throat, catching a slight edge in her tone, "Everything alright?"

"Fine," Alexis nodded with a quick glance up to shoot him a small smile. "It's not, by the way…the chair, it's not taken."

Kevin parked himself in the chair and stared at her for a moment. "You sure things are okay?" he asked again, "Is there something on my face?" He swiped at his face thinking she saw something.

"There's nothing there," Alexis assured him. "How's Sarah Grace?"

"Cuter than ever," he smiled, "She keeps asking for sand. I think she had fun at Castle's party."

"I'm glad," Alexis smiled. "I had fun with her, too."

"I think I'm going to have a regular beach bunny on my hands," he continued to smile like the proud papa he was.

"Yeah, that was me and Dad several years ago," Alexis replied, "I was always trying to bury him in the sand."

"I know. He has pictures," Kevin smiled before he got serious, "What's going on Alexis?"

"What do you mean?" Alexis returned her attention to her book.

"Come on," he prodded her, "I can see there is something going on. You can barely look at me for more than a few seconds before you bury your head back in that book. Did I do something? Or not do something?"

"You didn't do anything, I promise," Alexis shook her head as she made herself look at Kevin. "And you didn't not do something. I've just been busy."

"It can't be with schoolwork because it's summer," Kevin replied, "I'm a good listener."

"I'm sorry. It's nothing personal, I just can't talk about it with you," she bit her lip and forced herself to look away.

"Alexis," Kevin reached out and touched her arm. She immediately jerked away.

"I'm sorry," Alexis quickly gathered up her belongings, "I just remembered that I was meeting a friend. I'll see you around."

Kevin didn't move as Alexis ran out of the coffee shop. What the hell had just happened?

=d=d=d=d=

"Yes, Dad, I'm at the station," Alexis spoke to her father via Kate's cell phone, "I'll make sure your phone stays on the charger, so it's all ready for you when you and Kate get back into the city. Enjoy the Hamptons."

" _Thank you, Sweetie. I appreciate it,"_ Castle smiled. _"We'll see you Sunday night."_

"Bye, Dad," Alexis replied as she disconnected her call just as the elevator door opened. It was late, and no one should be around. The floor was fairly dark, but she knew her way around well enough to not bump into any of the office furniture.

Castle said he'd left it on Kate's desk, so Alexis headed in that direction. She could just barely make it out in the moonlight.

"Alexis, is that you?" Kevin had just emerged from the break room with a cup of coffee, "What are you doing here? Kate and your father are in the Hamptons."

"Yeah, I know," Alexis was startled by his sudden appearance but quickly recovered. "Dad forgot his phone."

"Aw, I was wondering if he was going to miss that," Kevin went to Kate's desk to grab it for her, "I almost called Kate with the offer to drop it at the loft."

"Thanks," Alexis reached for it as Kevin got closer, "I didn't think anyone would be here."

"I had a bit of paperwork that I wanted to wrap up before I started my weekend," Kevin explained his presence at the office. "You joining Castle and Beckett in the Hamptons for the weekend?"

"No, just me and a movie marathon this weekend," Alexis said.

"Anything exciting?" Kevin asked.

"All three _Back to the Future_ 's," Alexis admitted. "Dad doesn't like them much, so when I have the place to myself, I like to watch them."

"The second one's a little iffy for me, but I love the first and third," Kevin replied, "Sounds like a fun weekend."

"Yeah," Alexis smiled. "I better go. Goodnight."

"Hey, Alexis, wait," Kevin called out to her, "Do you have a minute? I want to ask you something."

"I really don't," Alexis pressed the button. "Gram is waiting downstairs for me."

"Alexis," Kevin reached for her hand, "Am I imagining things, or are you avoiding me for a reason?"

Alexis's hand smoothly avoided his as she turned her head, "Not at all. I just have to go."

"Alexis, please, if I've done something wrong, I'm sorry." he halted her from getting on the elevator by cutting off her path, "Tell me what I did wrong."

"You didn't do anything wrong," Alexis told him. "I just don't want to keep my grandmother waiting. I'll talk to you later."

"Lex," he was able to grasp her hand, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Alexis shook her head. "Can you let go now?"

"Not until you tell me what I did wrong?" he pressed, "You're avoiding me like the plague. You have been since we played with Sarah Grace in the sand at the beach. Did I do or say something that made you uncomfortable?"

"It's nothing. Can't you just leave it alone? Leave me alone," Alexis jerked her hand away and darted past Kevin into the elevator.

Kevin quickly slipped into the elevator and jammed the emergency break when the doors closed. "What did I do?"

"It's not you," she hollered at him, "It's me. Now restart this elevator."

"No," Kevin stood in her way, "What do you mean it's you?"

"It's stupid," Alexis shook her head and looked away. "It's not your problem."

"If it involves you, it's not stupid," he told her gently, "What is it?"

"Tell me you felt it," she whispered.

"What?"

"Oh God," Alexis flushed realizing she'd spoken out loud. "Never mind. Just restart the elevator and let me go home."

"No," he held firm before swallowing hard. He'd forced the issue. Now he had to follow through. "And I did."

"What?" It was Alexis's turn to look surprised.

"I felt it that night of Castle's award and then again on the beach in the Hamptons," his voice hitched as he spoke, "I felt it."

"You-oh God," Alexis looked more distressed than before if that was possible. "This is not good. This is bad. This is very bad."

"Is it?" he challenged her.

"Are you kidding me?" Alexis looked at him. "Yes, it's bad. It's more than bad. Bad was thinking that I was losing it when you touched me, but knowing that you felt it too? That's on level with catastrophic."

"We haven't done anything wrong," he reminded her, "It's just an…attraction. It happens."

"Not when one of the two people are married," she grasped his left hand and held to up for him to see, "You're married, Kevin."

"Yeah, I know. I know all about it," he shook his head. "What if I wasn't?"

"We can't go there," Alexis shook her head. "You are. That's all that matters."

"Yeah," he nodded while averting his gaze, "You're probably right."

Alexis let go of his hand, "Restart the elevator. I need to go home."

"Lex, I'm sorry," he replied.

"Maybe it's best if we didn't...you know...see each other," she suggested, "Remove temptation, so to speak."

"And how are we supposed to accomplish that?"

"We just don't see each other unless we can't avoid it."

"You make that sound easy," he replied, "But how much have we bumped into each other recently without even trying?"

"You weren't looking for me the other day?" Alexis looked at him. "That coffee shop was not on your way home or anywhere near the precinct. It was around the corner from where I live."

"I...ah..." he fumbled for a response.

"That's what I thought," Alexis nodded. "Why were you looking for me?"

"I guess I just wanted to see you," he replied.

"That's the problem," Alexis shook her head. "We can't see each other."

"Yeah, you're probably right," he nodded.

"I'm gonna miss you," she admitted.

"Yeah, me too," he frowned.

Alexis reached around him and restarted the elevator. Neither said a word until the elevator reached the ground floor. "Bye, Kevin," she kissed his cheek once before she left.

Kevin watched her walk across the lobby of the precinct until the doors closed on him, "See ya, Lex."


	20. Flashback: It Happened One Night

So I am particularly fond of this flashback. I hope you guys are too.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis had just turned off the last light in the living room when someone knocked on the door.

" _Who is it?"_

Kevin didn't respond, he simply knocked a second time.

"Kevin," Alexis gasped when she opened the door, "If you're looking for them, Kate and my dad aren't here."

"I'm not. Can I come in? Can we talk?"

"I thought that we agreed…" she trailed off.

"I had a really bad day, and all I can think about is how much I want to talk to you about it," Kevin rambled on.

"You should…" Alexis trailed off as her eyes met his. "You should come in."

"I…ah…I should have called," he stepped into the loft, "You probably have plans."

"I do," she nodded.

"What?" he looked to her, "I should go then."

"Kevin, it's just me and my school books this weekend," she couldn't help the smile that came at how nervous he was standing in the living room.

"Oh," Kevin looked sheepish.

"Go sit," Alexis tilted her head. "Coffee or beer?"

"Coffee," Kevin nodded. "Thanks."

Alexis went to the kitchen and prepared each of them a cup of coffee, trying to keep her own nerves at bay.

"Were you going to sleep?" Kevin asked, noticing how dark it was in the loft.

"I was just going to my room to read," she handed him his cup of coffee.

"Thanks," Kevin smiled. "You reading anything good?"

"Just proofing my dad's latest masterpiece," Alexis admitted as she sat on the coffee table across from him. "So, what's going on?"

"Rough day at the office," he replied, "Our only witness was shot by our suspect, so the case is really going nowhere."

"I'm sorry," Alexis shook her head. "I don't envy your job on days like that."

"It doesn't always get to me like this," he responded, "Some days I find that I'm immune to it all, others it's like an open wound that just festers."

"Yeah, I know. It happens to Kate and Dad too. I see it when you guys are working a case that won't go anywhere."

"It's frustrating. We're one of the best homicide divisions in the country. Our closure rate is nearly double anyone else's in the city, but sometimes they get away with it and it sucks," he replied.

Alexis studied Kevin's face and frowned a little, "Why do I get the feeling this isn't all about the case? What's going on?"

"This thing between you and me, I know we agreed to stay away from each other because it's the smart thing to do, the rational thing, but why do we have to be smart and rational all the time?"

"Kevin, you know why," Alexis said. "Maybe we can be friends again after some time."

"Friends," Kevin nodded.

"Yes. We can listen when the other wants to talk about bad days. We can have coffee and joke around, but anything beyond that is a bad idea."

"Yeah, I know," he nodded, "Something else I know, you're the only one that I can be myself around anymore. I can talk to you about things that are bugging me that no one else can understand."

"That's not true," Alexis shook her head. "Javi would listen to you, and he'd understand. Brothers from another mother, remember?"

"I can't talk to him about the emotional stuff," Kevin shook off her suggestion.

"Like what?" Alexis asked.

"Like how much I want to kiss you right now," he licked at his lips.

"Kevin," Alexis sat up straight, putting some distance between them. "We can't."

"I know," he set his coffee aside, "Believe me, I know. I've spun this all around in my head for days …weeks. Everything tells me that this is wrong, and it shouldn't happen. I'm married. You're the daughter of one of my closest friends. You're twenty-two. I'm…more than twenty-two…"

He trailed off as he didn't know how to continue without sounding like a complete ass.

"I'd be lying if I said I'd never thought about it," Alexis said quietly. "Or that I haven't tried to put it out of my head by thinking the same things. God, Kevin, I had a crush on you when I was fifteen. If you had ever touched me back then and what happened at the awards or on the beach had happened, I think I would've lost my mind."

"I probably would have gone to jail," he responded, "But you're not fifteen anymore."

"But you are married," she reminded him again.

"I know," Kevin nodded. "But I don't know how not to think about you."

"Easy, just don't," she replied.

"How easy has it been for you?" Kevin asked her.

"It hasn't," she frowned, "I mean I'm a college student staying at home on a Friday night to read my father's manuscript rather than go out with friends. That's not normal, right?"

"I'm glad you're home," Kevin took a big chance and took her hand in his.

"Yeah, me too," her fingers curled into his.

"Can I kiss you?" Kevin leaned forward slowly.

"You shouldn't," Alexis backed away slightly.

"I shouldn't. We shouldn't. You can't. I can't," Kevin brushed his thumb over her fingers. "You're not telling me you don't want to."

"I…ah…" she fumbled for a response. Everything inside her was telling her to run, but there was one thing keeping her on the coffee table, the current that was pulsing between them from the link of their fingers.

"Tell me to stop, and I will," he leaned towards her again.

Alexis didn't move. She did close her eyes as Kevin's lips gently touched hers. She felt a current flow through her lips, and she let her free hand cradle the side of Kevin's face gently while her other still held his.

Kevin's movements were tentative at first, waiting for her to push him away. His free hand slowly worked its way up her shoulder to her neck. He angled for better access as the kiss grew more passionate.

"Tell me to stop," he brushed his nose against her cheek, relishing the feel of her against his fingertips.

"Don't you dare," she shook her head slightly before mashing her lips against his for a second kiss.

Kevin pulled Alexis closer. She straddled his lap as his lips trailed down her neck.

"Not here," she breathed quietly. She'd walked in on her dad and Kate far too many times to ever feel comfortable doing anything on the couch.

"Then where?" his hand trailed down her waist, keeping her close in case she had a thought of pulling away.

"My room," she looked at him.

"Guide the way," he rose with her still in his arms. Her arms and legs wrapped around him in an effort to stay close.

"Up the stairs, on the left."

Kevin's lips fused with hers. He somehow managed to make his way to her bedroom.

Once there, he sat her down on her bed. She scooted back so that she was lying against her pillows. He followed her after shedding his shoes, coat, and tie.

Alexis reached for him when he got close enough. Kisses began to melt into one another as she searched out the buttons of his dress shirt.

Kevin's fingers slipped under her camisole, feeling the silk of her skin against his fingertips.

"So soft," he mumbled as he inched her camisole up her body.

Alexis pulled Kevin's shirt free of his pants once she had it unbuttoned and let her fingers trace the contours of his chest, from his collarbone down to his waist where she unbuckled his belt and then his pants. She looked up into his eyes, studying them for any hesitation.

Kevin gently pushed her arms up over her head and lifted the camisole from her body. He sat back for a moment to admire the treasure that he had unveiled.

Alexis grew impatient. She reached for him, beckoning him closer.

Kevin pulled at the sleeves of his shirt to free himself from it before coming back to her. He savored the feeling of being skin to skin with her.

Alexis's hands went to his pants again, pushing them from his hips. She lost focus when his lips began roaming her neck, finding sensitive points she didn't even know she had. She released a moan that surprised them both. They froze against each other for a moment. Their eyes locked. This was the point of no return.

Alexis rolled onto her side and reached into her nightstand drawer. She pulled a condom out and turned back to Kevin, handing it to him with a soft kiss.

"Are you sure?" Kevin hesitated when she lay out.

"I haven't told you to stop yet, have I, Detective?"

"Be sure. Lex, be sure."

"I'm sure," Alexis nodded.

"Good answer," he grinned, his fingers sifting through her hair.

"Are you?" she couldn't help but ask, thinking that maybe he was trying to give her an out so he wouldn't have to back away first.

"I've never been more sure," he pulled her in for a breathless kiss.


	21. Flashback: Consequences

Thanks for all the _amazing_ replies. To the Guest who wished we hadn't ended where we did, sorry but Goodform and I don't do NC-17. ;) Keep up the replies.

-d-d-d-

Alexis rummaged through her purse while walking through the park. She wanted to call her dad to see how his and Kate's weekend was going. She needed something else to think about.

Realizing that she must have left her phone someplace during her guilt induced haze, she saw a random payphone and decided to see if it was still functional. She found a few quarters at the bottom of her purse and slipped them into the phone. She was surprised to hear a dial tone before she dialed.

It rang a few times before a very familiar voice that she last heard whispering into her ear about how good she felt said, _"Hello?"_

"Kevin?" she stated tentatively.

" _Alexis, thank god_ ," Kevin released a sigh of relief, " _Where are you? I've been worried. You left without a word_."

"Why do you have my phone?" Alexis asked nervously.

" _You left it at the loft_ ," he explained.

"I live at the loft, so eventually I would've come home to find it. You didn't have to take it."

" _We need to talk_ ," Kevin said.

"No, we don't," Alexis shook her head. "Just leave the phone at the front desk of the precinct. I'll pick it up on my way home."

" _I'm not going to give you back your phone until we talk_."

"Excuse me? Kevin, you cannot hold my phone hostage," Alexis frowned.

" _That's exactly what I'm going to do until we talk_ ," he insisted.

"What we did was a mistake," she responded, "We don't need to talk about how bad a mistake it was."

" _We can't just pretend it never happened_ ," Kevin told her.

"Why not? It's easy. We forget what happened and just avoid being alone together for the rest of our lives."

" _Is it really going to be easy_?"

"Yes, because we were stupid and impulsive."

" _But we weren't drunk_."

"I wish we would have been," she sighed, "Then we'd have an excuse."

" _We need to talk_ ," Kevin repeated quietly.

Alexis concentrated on the background noise coming through the phone for a moment and then gasped, "You're at work?"

" _Yeah, but we aren't working a hot case right now. I can get free. Perhaps coffee_?" he suggested.

"Where's Espo?"

" _Talking to the captain at the moment_ ," Kevin replied.

"Thank God," Alexis sighed. She hadn't even considered him being overheard until she realized that Kevin was somewhere with a lot of people, people who knew her dad. "Look, Kevin, we don't have to talk about this."

" _Yeah, I think we do_ ," he replied.

"We had sex. It was-"

" _Amazing_ ," he finished.

"Wrong," Alexis finished.

" _Alexis, you're not getting your phone back until I get a face to face conversation_ ," Kevin said firmly.

"Oh God. Fine," Alexis gritted out. "Do you know where my grandma's studio is?"

" _Yeah_ ," he confirmed, " _I'll meet you there in twenty_."

"Don't forget my phone," Alexis said sweetly.

" _See you soon_ ," Kevin responded before ending the call.

Alexis hung up the phone and went to grab a cab.

-d-d-d-

Alexis looked up when the door to the auditorium opened.

Kevin held a bouquet of flowers in his hand as he made his way towards her. He had the cell phone tucked into it.

"An 'I'm sorry' would have sufficed," Alexis smiled in spite of herself.

"I wanted to make an entrance," he handed her the flowers with a sheepish grin.

"Thanks," Alexis took the flowers and plucked her cell phone out of them. "Did anyone besides me call?"

"Just your father," he shrugged as she laid the flowers aside, "I answered and confessed."

"You didn't!" she gasped.

Kevin started to laugh, "Gotcha."

"That is so not funny," she threw a pillow at him and then lay back on the stage to look at the ceiling.

Kevin sat down on the stage next to her, "I know we should be sorry about what we did, but I'm not."

"What about your wife? What about your daughter?" she asked.

"Lex, c'mon," Kevin shook his head. "For the past four months, you've been listening to me rant about the disintegration of my marriage. Do you really think Jenny entered my mind last night?"

"You're not that cold," Alexis shook her head.

"It's complicated," Kevin conceded, "But I'm not ready to give up on this...whatever this is. I think we owe it to ourselves to figure out exactly what this is."

"A onetime thing is what this is," Alexis shook her head.

"You're a lousy liar, Alexis Kathleen."

"Don't go pulling out my middle name," she snapped at him.

"Look at me," Kevin ordered softly.

She shook her head from side to side, refusing his request.

Kevin lay on his side and reached out, turning her face to his, "I'm not sorry, and I don't think you are either."

"I should be," she spoke softly, "I should be marching straight to your wife's door and begging for forgiveness on my hands and knees, but..."

Kevin smiled when she added the 'but'.

"You're right. I'm not sorry either," she admitted.

"I don't want this to be a onetime thing," he replied.

"Kevin," Alexis shook her head, "I admit that I'm not sorry, but we should not be fooling around behind everyone's back."

He leaned down and kissed her gently.

Alexis's rational mind wanted to pull away and slap him, but her emotional heart wanted to keep this moment bottled up inside her forever.

One of her hands wrapped around the wrist of his hand that was cupping her cheek while her other cupped the back of his head when the kiss deepened.

Kevin's free hand tangled in her hair when he pulled away to look her deep in the eyes.

"Oh my God," Alexis breathed shakily. "What are we doing?"

"Following our hearts," he replied.

Alexis sat up and brought Kevin with her. Climbing into his lap, she reached for the buttons of his shirt and one by one began opening them.

"Are you sure?" he smiled at her initiative.

"Yes," she nodded, "I'm sure."

"Good," he smiled before diving in for another kiss.


	22. Flashback: Birthday Wishes

Have a good Sunday.

-d-d-d-

Alexis stood behind the bar watching the party around her.

"I can't believe you didn't bring a date," Lanie commented from her stool.

"I've been so busy with school, I haven't had time to find one," Alexis rubbed at the counter of the bar, having volunteered to be the bartender for the party so her father didn't have to pay one of his employees overtime.

"He looks like he's having a good time," Javier nodded towards Kevin, who was currently laughing with a couple of other detectives.

"Yeah, it's a good turnout," Alexis agreed, "I don't recognize some of these guys. Are they from his vice days?"

"A couple," Javier nodded. "I had to go through his email to get their names."

"Jenny didn't help?" Alexis asked.

"To be honest, I don't think she even remembered it was his birthday," Javier spoke quietly, "He called her today from the office to ask what time he should pick her up for the party, and sounds like she was confused by what he was talking about."

"Nice," Alexis commented. "You want a refill, Javi?"

"Oh yeah," Javi nodded, "With Castle picking up the tab tonight and tomorrow being our day off, I'm going to get stupid drunk tonight."

"What's your excuse for every other day of the year?" Lanie teased him.

Alexis giggled while she refilled Javier's glass and handed it over, before she glanced over at where Kevin was standing. She shot him a smile and then back to Lanie, "You sure about giving me the day off tomorrow?"

"Absolutely," Lanie replied, "Live it up, Girl."

"I can introduce you to some of the single ones if you're interested," Javi suggested.

"Javi," Alexis put her hands on his shoulders and smiled, "I love you like an uncle, but I will not let you fix me up. Karpowski still won't shut up about the guy you tried to fix her up with."

"Your loss," Javi shrugged, "Or theirs rather."

"Go dance," Alexis advised.

"What do you say, Lanie?" Javi extended his hand to her, "Want to tear it up with me?"

"Sure, why not?" Lanie shrugged.

"Hey, Alexis," Jenny ambled over to the bar shortly after Lanie and Javi made their way to the dance floor, "Can I get a refill on my wine?"

"Sure," Alexis nodded and poured Jenny a glass. "It's been a while."

"It was what, that award ceremony for your dad. That was six months ago, wasn't it?" Jenny smiled.

"We didn't really talk, but I did see you at the party Dad threw in the Hamptons," Alexis reminded her. "How's Sarah Grace?"

"Cute as a button," Jenny replied, "Looks like Kev got a good turnout. I feel like such an idiot, I completely forgot about the party tonight. Guess I had something else on my mind."

"Right. Kevin's a popular guy. People like him," Alexis smiled.

"I wish he'd take that desk job already," Jenny swirled her wine in her glass, "I hate that he's in danger all the time."

"I didn't realize that was something he wanted to do," Alexis frowned, "Dad or Kate haven't mentioned anything about that."

"He's still on the fence," Jenny sighed.

"Yeah, I can't say that I can see him behind a desk forty hours a week," Alexis replied, "He seems to like his work."

"I know, but I would like a husband and for my daughter to have a father," Jenny countered.

"Right," Alexis nodded. "Will you excuse me? I'm going to make sure the cake's ready."

Jenny walked back to Kevin's side, threading her arm through his, playing the dutiful wife. The sight made Alexis sick to her stomach, especially knowing what was going on behind closed doors.

-d-d-d-d-d-

"I'll clean up a little and lock up, Dad. Take Kate home," Alexis smiled.

"Thanks, Sweetie, I owe you one," her father responded. His eyes were shining just a bit thanks to the drinks he'd consumed.

"I'll add it to the list," Alexis teased. "Night, Kate."

"Night, Bud," Kate smiled.

Alexis locked the door behind her dad and stepmother. She picked up a long box from behind the bar and set it on the countertop. Just as she turned to pour a drink she heard the kitchen door open and close.

"We alone?" a voice asked.

She turned around and nodded, "Happy Birthday."

"Thanks, Babe," Kevin advanced towards her with a wide grin, his arms immediately going around her waist.

"Hey," Alexis hugged him. "You have a good time tonight?"

"It was almost perfect," he pecked at her fragrant neck while his hands worked their way down her body.

"You're awfully handsy tonight, Detective," she smiled, "Did someone have a few drinks?"

"It was good alcohol," Kevin smiled. "Besides, I had to do something to calm me down."

"I wish I was the one on your arm tonight," Alexis gave a momentary frown.

"Why do you think I needed calming down?"

"Jenny had a few interesting comments tonight," Alexis replied, "Are you really considering a desk job?"

"No, I'm not considering it," he shook his head, "She keeps bringing it up."

Alexis pulled herself up on a stool, "You okay?"

"She forgot about tonight."

"Yeah, she mentioned that," Alexis replied, "Does that mean she didn't get you a gift either?"

"I think she was planning on giving me one when we got home. She mentioned our room," Kevin admitted. "I told her I had to get Javi home and that I'd crash there."

"Was she mad?" Alexis asked.

"Hardly," Kevin snorted, "She seemed relieved."

"Well, I have a gift for you," Alexis turned her head and nodded to the box on the bar.

"You didn't have to get me anything," he eyed the box curiously.

"Yeah, I know. Open it," she smiled.

Kevin ripped at the paper with an eager grin. He couldn't for the life of him figure out what would fit in the box she's present to him.

"Alexis," he smiled as he opened the box. "Where did you get this?"

"I bought it," she teased. "You always smile when you talk about learning to play pool. I wanted to make you happy."

"Wow, this is great," he took a few practice strokes with the cue stick she's gifted to him, "Way better than those cues you usually find in pool halls."

"I'm glad you like it," Alexis smiled.

"I love it," he corrected her, "Thank you."

Alexis smiled shyly when the 'l' word came out of his mouth. She'd been so close to saying it on so many occasions.

"You're welcome," she pecked at his lips, "You know, my dad has a pool table here. Maybe you could teach me some tricks of the trade."

"You want me to teach you?" Kevin raised an eyebrow at her.

"Yeah," she replied, "I've always wanted to learn. It was the one trick Dad couldn't teach me. He's horrible."

"I'll remember that if I ever need to make a quick buck," Kevin smiled. "Okay. C'mon."

"Cool," Alexis smiled as they headed for the back.

"First things, first," he picked up a chalk cube, "The secret is in the chalk. Some think it's a waste of an effort, but to me it's an essential part of the game."

"Okay," Alexis nodded.

Alexis watched as he chalked the stick, with a surprisingly light touch. "Just enough to coat the tip," he handed her the chalk after helping her select her own cue stick.

"So what does this do?" she asked.

"Helps with accuracy," he responded, "Creates less friction between the stick and the ball."

"Oh, that makes sense," Alexis nodded. "What else?"

"Let's learn how to hold the cue properly," he bent over the table and showed how to hold the stick while lining up a shot, "There are different theories about holding the stick. I prefer the curl method, where you thread the cue through the finger. It gives me more control over the shot."

Alexis wasn't paying much attention to the words with the way he was bent over the table. He was presenting a very nice view of his backside.

"Lex?" Kevin got her attention.

"Sorry, what?"

"Where were you just now?"

"Nowhere," she said, trying to fight the flush she could feel creeping up on her.

"Okay," he smiled.

"Could you show me again?" Alexis stepped towards the table.

"Alright, you take the cue like this and line up your shot," Kevin put his arms around her from behind.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"Oh, yeah," he helped her with her form, curving himself into her, adjusting her hips slightly.

"What the hell," Alexis smiled. "It _is_ your birthday."

"You know, people often make bets on the outcome of a game."

"Seems like an unfair bet," she turned towards him suddenly, "You're a pro. I can't even hold the stick properly."

"Like you said, it is my birthday," Kevin smiled.

"Alright," she replied, "What's the bet?"

"You win, you get what you want," Kevin smiled. "I win, I get you on the table."

"On the table? That's what you want?"

"That's what I want."

"That was going to be what I wanted," she leaned into him, "How about we skip the game and get right to the reward?"

"You sure you don't want that lesson?"

"I suppose I can have both," she shrugged before turning away from him, "Help me with my form?"

"I like your form just fine," he ran an appreciative hand over her hip.

"Since my form is right, what comes next?" she leaned back just a touch.

"You figure out the angles," Kevin replied, "That's what pool is all about, angles."

"I've always been good at math," Alexis smiled.

"Try aiming the ball towards the '2' ball near the corner pocket," Kevin spotted the easiest shot on the table.

"Okay," Alexis took the shot and sunk it.

"You're a natural," he watched her celebrate her first successful shot.

"Thanks," Alexis smiled. "Now, about that bet..."

"You sink one shot and think you're suddenly an expert?" he teased.

"No, but I got what I wanted. Now, how about I give you what you want?" Alexis turned with a smile.

"Thought you'd never ask," he lifted her onto the table and climbed over her.

"Happy Birthday," Alexis smiled as she let herself fall onto the felt of the table.

"Didn't think my birthday wish would come true so soon," he dove in for a kiss that left them both breathless before proceeding to make love to her on the table.


	23. Flashback: Running Scared

Kevin looked at his cell phone and frowned. Nothing. No messages or missed calls. He hadn't heard from Alexis in days, and he was starting to worry.

He looked up when he heard Castle's voice.

"I just worry. Is that so bad?...Yes, I know how old you are. I'm still your father. I'm allowed to worry about you…Okay, sweetie. I will. I love you, too. Bye."

Castle hung up his phone and headed to the break room. Kevin waited a moment and then headed in after him.

"Hey, how's it going, Castle?"

"Good," the writer nodded as he sat down with his coffee. "You?"

"Not bad," Kevin started making himself a cup of coffee.

"How's that little girl of yours?" Rick asked.

"She's perfect," he smiled. "Did I just hear you talking to yours?"

"Yeah, she's going through something right now. Won't tell me what it is as I 'won't understand'. She's been spending a lot of time at my mom's studio."

"Learning about the other family business," Kevin nodded. _Bingo!_

"I doubt it. Mother's on tour with her play, so the school's closed for the time being. She says it's quieter than the loft right now."

"If I can do anything, let me know," Kevin offered.

"Thanks, but I think it's just nerves about medical school. She's still deciding where she wants to apply."

"I hear New York has some of the best med schools," Kevin replied.

"That's what Kate and I keep telling her," Castle smiled. "Speaking of, I have to get supplies for dinner tonight. We're having Jim over."

"Is Alexis joining you?" he poked around.

"No, she says she has to study. She's going to a play with him next week to make up for it."

"Say hi to her for me when you see her next."

"I will," Castle nodded. "See you later."

"Bye," Kevin smiled.

The end of his shift couldn't come soon enough. He pulled out his phone to tell his wife he'd be late getting home and to not wait up.

-d-d-d-

Kevin tried the front door of the studio and found it locked. He considered picking it but didn't want to get caught by a passerby. Instead he went around to the alley and through the open basement door.

Alexis heard the noise and reached for a vase to protect herself from the intruder. She was cursing that her purse was in one of the seats and with it the pepper spray Kate insisted that she carry.

She hid behind one of the couches on stage and got ready to throw as soon as the intruder showed themselves.

"Alexis," Kevin called out when he strolled onto the stage, "Are you here?"

"Kevin," Alexis released a great sigh of relief, "You scared the crap out of me."

"Sorry. Why haven't you called me back?"

"What are you doing here?" Alexis played the shrink game of answering a question with a question.

"Looking for you," he focused on the vase in her hands. "What are you doing?"

"I thought you were a thief."

"You haven't answered my question," he responded, "I've been trying to get hold of you for days."

"I've been busy," Alexis avoided his eyes and put the vase down while keeping herself a good distance from Kevin.

"Too busy to call me back?" he sounded hurt.

"I have a lot of studying to do, and you have murders to solve."

"It's been a slow week, murder wise."

"Well, it hasn't been a slow week for me, studying wise," Alexis inched her way towards the stairs slowly, hoping he wouldn't notice that she was trying to make a getaway.

"Lex, what's with the silent treatment?" he grasped her hand and spun her towards him.

"No silent treatment, just busy," she pulled her hand away.

"Tell that to the dozens of messages I left for you," he replied.

"I called you back a couple of times."

"Yes, times you knew I wouldn't be able to answer," Kevin nodded, "Like when I was standing right next to your father or Beckett or Javi. Did you plant a camera on me somehow?"

"Don't me ridiculous. What do you want from me, Kevin?" she replied, "I've said from the beginning that this thing between us was a bad idea, and we keep making it worse. Why won't you just let this go?"

"Because I love you, dammit!"

"Well, get over it and go back to your wife and daughter," she hollered.

Alexis took the opportunity to run down the stairs and grab her bag.

"Alexis!" Kevin called after, but Alexis kept going.

Kevin couldn't believe that she'd walked out after he'd just bared his soul to her.

-d-d-d-

Alexis sighed as she sat up in bed. It was after one a.m., and she couldn't sleep.

She knew what was bugging her, but pride was keeping her from picking up the phone to call Kevin.

 _Because I love you, dammit!_

It kept replaying over and over in her head.

She knew what she'd wanted to say, but she also knew that there would be no turning back once the words were out.

She looked at her cell phone and bit her lip. If she called his cell phone right now, he'd answer it. If she called his extension at the 12th, he wouldn't be there right now.

It was the easy way out, but she took it. She dialed his phone at the precinct and waited for the voicemail to kick in.

 _This is Kevin Ryan. I'm unavailable right now. Leave a message._

"I love you, too," Alexis said and then hung up.

-d-d-d-

Kevin sipped his coffee as he sat down at his desk.

"You look like hell, Bro," Javier remarked.

"Thanks," Kevin snorted.

"Did you sleep at all last night?"

"No," he shook his head before he gave the response he'd rehearsed, "Sarah Grace had a nightmare and couldn't get back to sleep."

"Sorry, Man," Javier nodded. "But as far as reasons to look like hell, that's a pretty good one."

Kevin noticed that the light was on his phone to indicate he had a message. He was about to dial when Beckett called them into the captain's office. They'd caught a new case.

-d-d-d-

Kevin looked at the financial records of the victim with a sigh. He was starting to get a headache. As he reached for a pen he noticed his voicemail light blinking. He realized that he'd never had a chance to check it that morning.

"Find anything in those records yet?" Javier asked while Kevin dialed into his voicemail.

"This guy has more hidden assets than King Tut's tomb," Kevin shook his head and then frowned when he heard the time stamp. Who the hell had called him at one in the morning?

 _I love you, too._

Kevin reached for his jacket after slamming down the phone, "Tell Beckett that I had to go out for a while."

"Where are you going?" Javier asked, "We're in the middle of a case."

"I'm available by phone. It's important," Kevin called over his shoulder.

"Beckett's not going to be happy," Javier mumbled under his breath while Kevin took off.

-d-d-d-

Alexis was sitting in the front row of seats at her grandmother's studio with her legs over the armrest and her psych book open on her lap.

She was surprised that she hadn't heard from Kevin all day. She thought perhaps she'd ruined what they'd had by walking out on him the night before.

"I think I'm gonna need a set of keys to this place if you're going to be hanging out here so much," Kevin said from the stage. "Plus, you need a new lock on the basement door."

A gigantic smile appeared on her lips when he waved a bouquet of flowers and walked towards her, "Well considering you keep breaking in, do you think you're trustworthy enough for a set of keys?"

"Desperate times. Besides, I am a detective," Kevin reminded her, "And apparently you're in love with me, so I think I can be trusted."

"So you did get my message," she concluded, "I was worried that you didn't."

"I got it a little while ago," he put the flowers down on the seat next to her as he knelt down in front of her. "Did you mean it?"

"Yeah, I meant it," Alexis nodded.

"Why did you walk out on me last night?"

"Abject terror," Alexis admitted.

"You have nothing to be scared of with me," he grasped her hand.

"I'm not scared of you as a person, Kevin. I know you'd never raise a hand to me or let anyone else do it either. My fear comes from knowing that I might be responsible for your daughter's family falling apart."

"That is not your responsibility," he assured her.

"Kevin," Alexis shook her head.

"Look at me," he said and waited until her eyes were on his. "My marriage was falling apart long before I even considered sleeping with you."

"But it crumbles a bit more every day you and I are together," she replied, "Are you thinking about divorcing her?"

Kevin nodded, "I never wanted to be the guy who gets a divorce, but I can't see the life we wanted to have anymore."

"What life did you want to have?" she asked, "And what makes you think I could possibly give you what Jenny can't?"

"You already give me what she can't," Kevin told her. "I couldn't sleep last night because all I kept seeing was you walking away."

"I'm sorry," she frowned, "I panicked."

"I know," he nodded. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. I hurt you."

"I'm not fragile," he assured her.

Alexis leaned down and kissed him, her hands framing his face.

"I have to get back to the station," he pulled away reluctantly.

"Right now?" she asked, playing with his tie.

"Unfortunately, yes," he frowned, "We're in the middle of a hot case."

"Okay," she smiled. "Call me later."

"I'll stop by after shift," he offered.

"No, I need to make an appearance for dinner at home tonight, or Dad is going to start looking for me. With my luck, he'll find me just as you take off an article of clothing."

"This weekend?" he inquired, "Sarah Grace and Jenny are doing this girls' weekend with her mother. We could have the entire weekend to ourselves."

"I'd like that. Gram won't be home for another few weeks. We could use her place."

"I'll call you when I finish my shift on Friday. We'll meet up then."

Alexis nodded, "Okay. Be careful out there, Detective."

"I will," Kevin smiled. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

-d-d-dd-d-

It's out there. They love each other. Tell us what you think.


	24. Flashback: Dancing in the Rain

We decided that A&K needed a date. Tell me something good.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis was leaning against the wall of the lobby in her grandmother's building waiting for Kevin. He'd gotten stuck at work so they'd decided to meet at Martha's building and order in.

Thankfully her grandmother was gone for a few more weeks with her production.

"Sorry, I'm late, Babe," Kevin greeted her with a kiss to her cheek while holding something behind his back away from her view.

"It's okay," she took his hand and led him to the elevator, "Getting stuck at work happens to all of us."

"You look amazing," he whispered. "I'm sorry you had to waste the outfit on a night in."

"I'm not," she tugged at his tie once the elevator had closed, "I've missed you."

Kevin tilted his head with a grin as his forehead rested against hers, "I keep spacing out at the worst possible times. Today it was during an interrogation."

"Yeah, that's not good," she smirked, "Anything on your mind?"

"You," he brushed his lips against hers, "Always you."

"I came within two numbers of dialing your cell phone last night. It was about two a.m."

"And what did you want to talk about?"

"How much I missed your hands on me."

"I'll have more than my hands on you soon," he vowed while backing her up against the wall of the elevator.

"Promise," she batted her lashes just as the door to the elevator opened onto her grandmother's floor.

"God, yes," Kevin followed her out of the elevator and down the hall.

"So Jenny is having a girl's weekend, right?" Alexis tried to concentrate on unlocking the door, but Kevin's tongue on her neck was not making the task easy.

"Right," he murmured. "Where does Castle think you are?"

"Study groups all weekend. I told him I'd probably sleep in a friend's dorm room."

"Two blissful days of just me and you," his free hand brushed the hair away from her shoulder so he had better access.

"Perfect weekend," she moaned as she finally got the door opened and quickly pushed their way inside.

She spun quickly and began pulling at his tie, wanting to get him out of his clothes as quickly as possible so she could ravish him.

She couldn't help leaping in fright when she heard the thunder rumble. Instinctively, her arms tossed around his neck and brought their fully clothed bodies impossibly close.

"I have something for you," he whispered in her ear as he produced a bouquet of orange roses.

"They're beautiful," she smiled. "I've never gotten orange roses before."

"I wanted something that showed my gratitude and passion for you," Kevin replied, "The florist told me these met the criteria."

Alexis held the roses with one hand and put her free arm around his neck as she kissed him.

"I'm gonna find a vase for these," she whispered. "Decide where you want to order from."

Kevin began shuffling through the take out options while he watched Alexis sift through her grandmother's cabinets for a vase.

She found one and filled it with water before unwrapping the flowers and putting them in the vase and setting them on the table behind her grandmother's couch. Just as she turned a bolt of lightning lit up the sky outside and the rain started to fall. She went to the balcony doors and looked up.

"That's a pretty fierce storm," Kevin came up behind her, "Are we sure we want to send out a delivery man in this weather?"

"Unless we want to starve," Alexis laughed softly. "You know my grandmother's culinary skills aren't the greatest. I doubt there's anything edible in her refrigerator."

"I guess we'll just have to make the tip a little larger," he replied, "Thai okay?"

"It's fine," Alexis nodded. "How hungry are you?"

"Famished," He bit at her neck again.

"For food," she broke free from his embrace with a tempting smile.

"Uh, I could eat now or wait. Why?" Kevin looked at her curiously.

Alexis backed to the door and turned the handle before beckoning him closer, "How opposed are you to being seriously soaked?"

"If I'm with you, I have zero opposition," he caught her intention. His mouth went dry as he watched her shed her dress before stepping out onto the balcony. She was dripping wet in mere moments. She smiled and beckoned him towards her with a finger.

"Alexis Castle, you are going to be the death of me," he stepped into her after shedding his own clothes in record fashion and devouring her lips. Her moan was swallowed by a rumble of thunder.


	25. Flashback: Noble Attempts

Thanks for the great replies, guys especially Caskettshipper24.

-d-d-d-d-d

Alexis knocked on the door to her grandmother's apartment and waited.

"Alexis, darling, how are you?" Martha greeted her granddaughter with a hug.

"I'm great, Gram," Alexis accepted her hug and then let herself be ushered into the apartment.

"To what do I owe the honor of your presence?" Martha inquired, "Coffee?"

"No, thanks," Alexis shook her head and turned to look at the couch. A flash of her and Kevin kissing appeared in her mind's eye before she turned abruptly to face the kitchen.

"Come on, Alexis, I can see those wheels turning, so spill," Martha coaxed her granddaughter into revealing the reason she was there.

"Gram, have you ever seen someone that you shouldn't see?"

"Like a ghost?" Martha asked.

"Like a man," Alexis took a seat in the armchair.

"You're seeing someone," Martha gave an excited smile, "Details, please."

"I guess I should start with the big things," Alexis took a deep breath. "He's married."

"Oh, my," Martha's jubilant smile was suddenly erased.

"I'm not proud of it," Alexis added.

"I wouldn't think you would be," Martha nodded.

"But Gram, I knew he was married going in to everything. I can't even blame him for not telling me because I knew. It isn't some cheap thing where he didn't tell me."

"So how did it all start?" Martha poured herself a glass of wine, despite how early in the day it was to start drinking.

"Innocently, I just ran into him when I was getting coffee, and we just talked for awhile."

"Ah, like the song," Martha nodded.

"The song?" Alexis frowned.

"From that Barbara Streisand movie, _The Mirror Has Two Faces_. I've always thought she was overrated," Martha waved a dismissive hand.

"I know, Gram," she chuckled before returning to their previous topic, "We kept bumping into each other, and there was this spark that continued to fester. I thought it was a one sided crush, but it turned out to be reciprocated."

"And he's older?"

"Yeah, he is. Gram, I slept with him."

"Yes, that's what usually happens between two people that are attracted to each other," Martha replied, "And you're being safe?"

"We are," Alexis nodded. "I don't know… but, Gram, I love him," Alexis got up and began to pace.

"How long has this been going on?" Martha asked.

"Friendship since about a month before Dad got his award," Alexis admitted. "I slept with him for the first time the weekend Dad and Kate went to visit her aunt."

"Alexis, I'm sure that the excitement of it all is a bit thrilling, but this cannot end well for anyone."

"I know," Alexis frowned, "I know this is all going to blow up in my face, but I can't help myself. I keep trying to end it, but he has some sort of magnetic pull on me."

"Alexis, he's not-"

"No! No, Gram," Alexis shook her head. "He's a perfect gentleman."

"Well, not a perfect gentleman," Martha raised an eyebrow at her granddaughter, "He is married to another woman."

"What do I do, Gram?" Alexis flopped herself down on her grandmother's sofa.

"Well, first of all, tell me why you looked so stricken when you looked at my couch."

"Remember that production that took you out of town for a few weeks awhile back?" she began, "We sorta used your place for a weekend."

"I see," Martha eyes went wide in surprise.

"I'm sorry. We just wanted to be alone."

"What's done is done," Martha assured her, "I hope you were courteous enough to wash the sheets before you left."

"Yes, we were," Alexis smiled. "Gram, I know I should end it, but I don't want to."

"Well there's nothing I can say to that."

"You can tell me I'm a horrible person. I deserve that much."

"You know what you're doing is wrong," Martha sighed.

"I need advice, Gram," Alexis replied, "I need someone that I trust to tell me what to do, to tell me that it's wrong and that it needs to end. Maybe then I'll finally do the right thing."

"Alexis, tell me what happened the first night you realized it wasn't one-sided."

"I was at the loft, and he knocked on the door. It'd been a couple of weeks since we'd seen each other so I was surprised to see him. He'd had a bad day and wanted to talk. He looked so depressed that I let him in."

"And then what happened?" Martha prompted her.

"We just talked...for awhile," she responded, "I confessed that I'd had a little bit of a crush on him since I was fifteen."

"I beg your pardon?" Martha looked to Alexis as it dawned on her who Alexis was seeing, but she wanted to hear it from her granddaughter. "Alexis, who are you seeing?"

"Oh God," Alexis realized she'd given her grandmother too much information. "Uh, Gram, you don't want me to answer that."

"Alexis, it's not..." Martha trailed off. She couldn't even get the words out.

"Yeah, it is," Alexis confirmed without actually saying Kevin's name.

"He has a child, Alexis, a little girl," Martha reminded him.

"I know all about it," Alexis remembered the 4th of July party where she played in the sand with the little girl. "Would you rather I slept with Espo?"

"Oh, god no," Martha scoffed, "Dr. Parish aside, who knows where that man has been?"

"Gram, this is such a mess. I needed someone to talk to," Alexis replied, "I need someone to tell me what to do."

"Sweetheart, you're not a child anymore. The truth is you never really were," Martha sighed. "Oh I wish I knew how to get in touch with your grandfather."

"Why?" Alexis gasped in horror, "You wouldn't have him take Kevin out, would you?"

"No, I'd have him beat the hell out of him," Martha said.

"I'm as much at fault as he is," Alexis stated, "We tried to ignore it. We went weeks without seeing each other after we acknowledged we had a thing, but fate brought us back together, and then that was it. There was no turning back."

"Does your father know?"

"Considering Kevin's still walking upright, no," Alexis shook her head.

"And I take it you want that to continue," Martha replied.

"Yes," Alexis nodded, "Gram, I need advice. Have you ever been in my shoes? Have you ever been the other woman?"

"No, I've only been the older woman."

"My grandmother, the cougar," Alexis smirked, "And her granddaughter, the home wrecker."

"What do you want to do, Alexis?" Martha took her granddaughter's hand. "What do you want to happen?"

"I want Kevin to be happy."

"And?"

"I don't think that can happen while we're together."

"And why is that?" Martha asked.

"Because as long as we are, he'd going to be split in two."

"Then you have to draw the line," Martha replied, "He's going to continue to be split in two for as long as you allow it."

"I love him, Gram," Alexis whispered. "But I have to let him go."

"You have to let him make a choice," Martha clarified, "But in making that choice, you have to be prepared to let him go."

"I better go. I have a phone call to make."

"If you need any advice, I'm always there for you," Martha hugged her.

"I know," Alexis hugged her. "I'll call you tomorrow. I love you, Gram."

"I love you too, Alexis," Martha kissed her forehead before walking her to the door.

As Alexis walked to the elevator she took out her phone and dialed.

 _"Ryan,"_ Kevin's voice came over the line.

Alexis hesitated for a moment before saying, "Hey, it's me. I…ah…we should talk about us. Kev, I can't do this anymore."

 _"What does that mean?"_ he asked, looking around to see who might overhear.

Alexis got onto the elevator, relieved that she was alone, "Don't call me anymore. We shouldn't see each other anymore. We need to go back to you being a friend of my dad's and me being his daughter."

 _"We need to meet,"_ Kevin replied.

"No," she protested, "Because then I'll change my mind. This has to end."

 _"If seeing each other means you'll change your mind then that means you don't want to do this."_

"You're right in that I don't want to, but I need to," Alexis said, trying not to cry. "We can't see each other anymore."

" _Meet me for coffee,"_ Kevin was pleading with her, _"We aren't working a hot case right now. I can meet you anywhere."_

"No. Don't call me anymore," Alexis hung up and sank against the wall of the elevator.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

"Javi, I need to step out for a bit," Kevin told his approaching partner, "Tell Beckett for me?"

"Sure," Javier nodded. "You okay?"

"No," Kevin walked towards the elevator without another word.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Alexis wandered around the city for hours. She didn't know how she found herself in the same theater in the village where she and Kevin had seen _Mr. Smith Goes to Washington_ , but there she was _._ Only this time she was watching _Casablanca_ and crying into her tub of popcorn.

It took longer than he had liked, mainly because he'd had to go back to the station, but Kevin found her and took a seat next to her. "Is that popcorn for sharing?"

"Go away," she said without looking at him.

"No," he said firmly.

"Why are you doing this?" she whispered into the nearly empty theater, "Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"You know why," Kevin said quietly. "I love you and despite the fact that you ignored every last call and text I sent you today, I know you love me too."

"But I shouldn't," she tossed her container of popcorn at him and left abruptly.

"Lex," he went after her, grasping her hand at the last minute before she left the lobby.

"Let go," she tried to pull her hand away but he wouldn't let go. "Kevin, let go."

"I can't," he shook off her demand, "I don't want to."

"We both know this is the way it's going to end," she replied, "I'm trying to end this before it hurts even more than it already does...You're married, Kevin."

"I don't care," Kevin said recklessly.

"I do. I'm not going to let you destroy yourself anymore. I'm taking myself out of the equation."

"You think I'm trying to destroy myself by seeing you? You have it all wrong. I'm trying to finally let myself be happy," he held her close, "Let me be happy, Lex. Let me love you."

"I love you," she whispered before she disentangled herself. "That's why I'm doing this."

"Lex, please," he looked her deep in the eyes, "Don't do this."

"I have to. You should go home. Maybe you can get there in time to tuck your daughter in," she said before she walked out of the theater and onto the street. She went towards the curb to hail a cab.

"What do you need me to say?" Kevin asked from behind her, "Do you want me to end my marriage because I will."

"No," Alexis shook her head as she turned around. "I don't want to be the reason your daughter barely sees you. I've been that kid, Kevin. Only my mother chose her career over her child."

"That's not how it would be," Kevin shook his head, "I'll work it out...we...we'll work it out."

"The only we you should be part of is you and Jenny," Alexis barely got the words out without throwing up.

"How do I fix this?" Kevin spoke slowly, emphasizing each word as he spoke. The pain in his eyes was nearly overwhelming. Alexis had to look away. "I can't lose you."

"That's the problem. I shouldn't be yours to lose," Alexis said quietly. "There shouldn't be a need for this conversation. We shouldn't be doing this."

"No, you're right, we shouldn't, but we are," he replied, "I can't stop it, anymore than you can."

"Let me walk away," Alexis begged.

"Not a chance."

"Please," she felt her willpower crumbling.

Kevin slowly, gently cupped her face and put his forehead to hers, catching her eyes with his, "Let me love you."

"This is so wrong," her arms went around his neck, her determination completely gone.

"No, it's not," Kevin shook his head.

"God, I love you," her fingers ran through the hair at the nape of his neck. She relished the feel of his arms falling to encircle her waist.

"I love you," he told her just before he kissed her.

"Gram's studio," she whispered against his lips, "Take me there."

Kevin nodded as he took her hand while they walked down the street.

Despite her noble attempt, she wasn't ready to lose him yet. Martha was right, she had to let him choose, but she had to be prepared to let him go. She wasn't yet. She hoped one day that she would be.


	26. Flashback: Always Enough

Thanks for all the replies. I love you guys.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis tipped her head back against the couch and stretched her legs out on the floor in front of her, letting the warmth of the fire warm her feet. It was quiet, and she was enjoying the company of her lover in the loft.

"We should shoo Beckett and Castle away more often," Kevin's fingers danced along her thigh.

Alexis rolled her head to smile at him, "It's been a good night."

"You make it sound like it's almost over," he nuzzled into her neck, "We have many more hours to enjoy each other."

"I know," she smiled. "I look forward to it. You want to go upstairs?"

"Not so fast," Kevin smiled. "I like being down here with you."

"You like cozying up by the fire," she curled into him.

"Yes," Kevin agreed. "Especially with that storm ragging out there."

"I don't know," she ran her fingers up his chest, "I rather like the rain."

"Oh yeah?" Kevin smiled. "Why's that?"

"Because you wet is such a turn on."

"Is that why you keep sneaking into my showers?"

"That's part of it," she tugged lightly on his earlobe.

"We're not making it upstairs," he turned to kiss her.

"No?" she smiled.

"Uh-uh," his hands slid up under the camisole she was wearing.

Alexis straddled his waist and leaned down, her hair falling like a curtain around them.

"Why, Alexis, are you trying to seduce a New York City detective?" he grinned.

"There's no trying involved," she laughed, "I believe I'm succeeding."

"You have no idea," Kevin groaned as she gently rocked against him.

"Here?" Alexis breathed.

"Right here," he spun her abruptly on her back, and he was above her.

"I love you," she told him as laced her fingers with his.

"I love you," he responded instantly.

"Prove it," she smiled.

"Gladly."

-d-d-d-d-d

Alexis smiled when she felt Kevin's lips against her shoulder, "You're going to make me fall asleep, and then you'll have to eat all this Italian by yourself."

"Can't help myself," he gave her one last kiss before putting a bit of distance between them.

"How's the Alfredo?" she asked.

"It's good," he nodded before studying her.

"What?" she felt her face, think she'd gotten marinara on her cheek.

"We should talk."

"About what?" she asked.

"About that noble attempt you made a few days ago," he began.

"Kevin," Alexis started, "I just think-"

"That you're ruining my life?" he finished.

Alexis released a heavy sigh, "I'm a big girl. I can deal with the consequences of my decisions. You can't deny how complicated your life has become since we started this...thing between us."

"Complicated, yes. Unhappy, no," Kevin shifted to sit between her legs. "I love you, Lex."

"How long is that going to be enough?" she set aside her container of eggplant parmesan. "The longer this goes on, the more likely it is that people are going to find out. Are you willing to deal with those consequences? I don't think I am."

Kevin took her hand, "Are you willing to lose us? Because I'm not."

"We move from one stolen moment to the next," she reminded him, "Is this enough?"

"Where are we going with this?" he asked, "Is this your way of asking me to leave my wife?"

"No," Alexis shook her head. "I told you, I'm never going to do that. Leaving Jenny means leaving Sarah Grace, and I don't want to be the reason you're just a bit player in your daughter's life."

"Can't we enjoy what we have without complicating things?"

"It's already complicated," Alexis reminded him, "By definition, this is complicated."

"I don't know what to say to make things better for us," Kevin stated, "Tell me what you need to hear."

"There's no easy fix for this," Alexis said. "I don't know that there is something you can say. If you leave Jenny, we both feel guilty and eventually one of us resents the other. Please don't tell me you'd never resent me because you can't know that."

"I love you, Alexis," he repeated, "Why can't that be enough?"

Alexis studied his face and let her thumb gently trace his cheekbone, "It can be for now."

Kevin swallowed hard when she added 'for now' because he knew they were approaching the day when being in love wouldn't be enough. He was so conflicted.

Alexis looked over her shoulder and smiled at the fire that was still going, "Come on."

"What?"

"Come with me," she took his hand.

"Anywhere," he gave her his most convincing smile.

Alexis led him back over to the couch. She sat him down in front of the couch on the floor and then grabbed the sheet that she wasn't wearing to cover them and sat between his legs, her back to his chest.

"We okay?" he asked tentatively.

"Yes," Alexis let her head rest back against his shoulder. Then she reached out and grabbed the remote. She pressed a button and the lights dimmed. Another press and music filled the room.

He felt her fall asleep minutes later.

"I love you," he whispered softly. "It's always going to be enough."


	27. Flashback: Take a Bow

thanks for the replies. This one's sad.

-d-d-d-

"Hang on, Ryan," Beckett said before the two got in the elevator to have lunch. "Hey, Babe."

Kate's eyes instantly filled with tears when her husband broke the news that his mother had passed away.

"Kate," Kevin looked concerned.

"Oh God," she whispered softly. "Where are you?"

"Is everything..." Kevin was waved off by Kate's signal to be silent.

"I'll be right there," Kate replied.

"What's wrong?" Kevin asked Kate when she put away her phone.

"I need you to drive me to the hospital," Kate demanded.

"What? What happened? Is Alexis alright?"

"It's Martha," Kate managed to croak out, "She was rehearsing for a show, and she just..."

"Just what?" Kevin asked.

"She's gone," Kate broke down in tears.

"Oh God," Kevin breathed. "Kate, I'm sorry."

Kate nodded, "Thank you. Will you tell Gates I won't be in tomorrow?"

"I'll drive you to the hospital, and then I'll call her," Kevin steered her towards his vehicle.

"Thanks," Kate nodded as she wiped away tears. "I don't even know if Alexis knows yet."

"Did you want me to call her?" Kevin offered.

"No," Kate shook her head, "This should come from Castle. The three of them have always been so close."

"I know," Kevin nodded. "Remember the first time we played poker with her?"

"And she said Texas Hold 'Em wasn't her game," Kate nodded. "She preferred strip poker."

"She was one of a kind," Kevin chuckled briefly.

"She was always so welcoming," Kate smiled. "Even when I wanted nothing more than to strangle Castle on a daily basis, she never treated me with anything but kindness."

Kevin ushered her towards his car and opened the door for her. He didn't know what else he could say. He couldn't even imagine what Alexis would be going through at the moment.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin let himself into Martha's studio in the evening after spending several hours looking for Alexis. He made sure to lock the door behind him before he went into the auditorium. The place was almost completely dark. He went down to the front row and frowned. Alexis wasn't in any of the seats.

He was starting to worry. She wasn't answering her phone, and he was running out of places to look for her.

He was about to leave when he noticed her bag and shoes in one of the chairs. She couldn't go too far without either. He stepped on stage and looked around before heading behind the curtain.

He picked his way through the backstage area, smiling at the names of shows that were painted on the walls. When he reached the props area where the furniture was stored, he found her lying on a bed.

His heart broke. She was curled into a ball, crying uncontrollably. He couldn't find the words to comfort her. He simply climbed in next to her and wrapped his arms around her.

She didn't startle at his touch, instead she burrowed into him. He brushed her hair back from her face, the strands damp with tears.

She burrowed into his chest, needing as much comfort as he could offer. She simply couldn't imagine a world without Martha Rodgers.

"I'm so sorry, Baby," Kevin whispered softly when she started to calm down.

"What am I going to do without her, Kev?" she asked weakly. "She was the only one I could talk to about...us."

He brushed away a few tears, "You can still talk to her. You'll probably even hear her answer you."

"She was more a mother to me than my own mother," Alexis's lip began to quiver with emotion.

"I know," Kevin nodded. "How long have you been here?"

"Since my dad called," she replied, "I just couldn't go to the hospital. I couldn't see her like that, which is weird because I've seen lots of dead people."

"No one you knew," Kevin reminded her. "Your dad's probably worried."

"He knew I was coming here," she spoke softly.

"Alexis, it's been hours," Kevin reminded her.

"I can't be in the loft right now," Alexis shook her head. "She lived with us for so long."

"Then where did you want to go?" he asked, "I'll take you anywhere. London? Paris? Just say the word."

"Just stay with me for a while?" Alexis nudged him onto his back with a small smile. "I want to be here with you."

"There's nowhere else I need to be," he held her close.

"I can hear your heartbeat," Alexis said quietly.

"How can I help?" he cupped her chin and angled her eyes to connect to his.

"You being here helps, believe me," Alexis assured him. "How'd you find out?"

"I was with Beckett when your dad called," he explained, "After I drove her to the hospital, I went in search of you."

"Don't Gates and Javi need you to help solve murders?" Alexis played with the buttons of his shirt. "I don't want you to get in trouble."

"Don't worry about that," he replied, "Me and Javi already agreed to take some time off."

Alexis's hand wrapped around Kevin's wrist and smiled at him, "Thank you for finding me."

"I'll always find you, Lex," he kissed her forehead. "It just may take me awhile."

Alexis snorted as she lay her head back down. She traced meaningless patterns on Kevin's chest for a little while before she slid her fingers into the spaces between his shirt buttons and felt his warm skin against her fingertips.

"What are you doing?" Kevin asked quietly.

"Nothing we haven't done before," she smiled without looking up.

"Lex," the smile in his voice was unmistakable, "Is this really a good idea?"

"If you didn't think so," Alexis nimbly undid a few of his buttons, "You wouldn't be smiling."

"I may be smiling but I don't think this is a good idea right now," Kevin protested.

"It's the best idea I've had all day," she continued toying with his shirt buttons.

Kevin caught her hand and held it, "No. I'm not letting you avoid how you feel right now."

"That's complete crap. You should be comforting me in any way that I need," she snarled at him, pushing away from his chest as she rolled off the bed, "How foolish of me to think that you could do that."

"Alexis, wait a second," Kevin sat up. "I am here for you, but you're not thinking straight."

"My grandmother just died," she stormed off, "Of course, I'm not thinking straight, but is it too much for you to comfort me in the way I need, not the way you think I should need."

"Alexis," Kevin chased after her and caught her on the stage. He held on tight around her middle. "I'm here. I won't let you leave."

"Let me go," she struggled against him.

"No," Kevin shook his head. "I love you."

"Kevin," she twisted and turned for several moments, but Kevin could tell that she wasn't truly trying to break free.

"I'm here. I'm right here," Kevin whispered into her ear.

Alexis turned in his arms, tears welling in her eyes. She was moments away from crumbling.

Kevin used his arms to shrug Alexis's around him and tucked her face into his neck, "It's gonna be alright."

"No, it's not," she shook her head slightly, "It's never going to be alright again."

Alexis's strength seemed to leave her all at once as she went limp and Kevin let them sink to the floor together, her in his lap.

Alexis sobbed again until she was nearly asleep, completely worn out from the emotions of the day.

"You want me to take you home?"

"No," she shook her head, "I can't go back there, not tonight."

"Lex, you can't stay here alone," he stroked her hair.

"I'll be okay," Alexis tried to smile. "Doors locked and alarm on. I'll curl up in bed and try to sleep."

"You shouldn't be alone tonight," he shook his head. "You should be with your dad. He needs you too."

"He has Kate," Alexis shook her head. "They'll be fine."

"Kate isn't his daughter," Kevin stated, "He'll want to share memories with you. The three of you were thicker than blood."

"I can't go into the loft tonight," Alexis shook her head. "I know I'm being a coward but I just can't be there tonight."

"Lex," he began.

"I'll be okay," she cut him off.

"I don't want to leave you alone," Kevin looked disturbed at the thought.

"But you have to," Alexis nodded.

"I'm sorry, but yes I do," he replied.

"I hate this," she felt fresh tears welling. "I hate that we have to sneak around all the time. I hate that you can't be with me when I need you most."

Kevin's eyes closed as he pressed a kiss to her forehead, "I hate it too. I want to stay here with you more than you could know. I can, if you want. I'll make-"

"No, someone might come looking," Alexis shook her head. "Go home and kiss your daughter. Call your mom and tell her you love her."

"Lex," Kevin looked sad.

"And then call me before you go to sleep."

"Are you sure you're going to be okay here?" he looked concerned.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded.

"I love you," Kevin smiled.

"I love you, too," she nodded.

"If you need anything…"

"I'll call you," she replied.

Kevin kissed her and then got up to leave.

"I can't leave you in the middle of the stage," he said.

"Are you going to tuck me into bed?"

"Yes," Kevin pulled Alexis up. "Come on."

"I'm not five," she stuck out her lip to pout.

"No, you are definitely not five."

"I don't need you tucking me in like a little kid," she moaned when he pulled her backstage.

"Give me this, okay? I can't stay all night but I can make sure you go to sleep."

"Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?" she looked to him with hopeful eyes.

"Sure," he nodded as he lay beside her.

"Thank you," she spoke weakly when she curled into him.

"Anything for my girl," he stroked her hair until her breathing evened out and she was asleep.

Kevin marched out of the studio with every intention of ending his marriage as he had so many times before, but somehow his wife manipulated him into feeling guilty.


	28. Flashback: New Beginnings

So this is the last flashback. Thanks for all the replies on the preceding ones.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Alexis opened her apartment door and smiled, "Hi, Chris."

"Hey, Darling," he grinned before engulfing her in a hug, as much as her pregnant belly would allow.

"I ordered pizza. I hope that's okay. My feet are killing me," she made her way back to the couch while Christopher shut the door.

"Let me rub them for you," Chris took a seat in front of her and began massaging her feet.

"That feels good," she relaxed onto the sofa, "Having to be on my feet for hours on end while pregnant is not the best career choice I've ever made.

"But you are brilliant, so you'll be a wonderful medical examiner," he grinned at her.

"You've been talking to Doctor Wade again, right?"

"She says you're one of the best students she's had in years."

Alexis beamed with pride.

"I wanted to talk to you about something," he continued to rub her feet.

"If you keep working your magic, you can talk to me about anything you want," Alexis smiled.

"I've been respectful, but it's only natural to be curious," he began.

"About?" she prompted him with a sense of dread.

"The baby's father," he said quietly when he placed a hand against her stomach.

"Christopher," Alexis shook her head.

"I know you don't want your daddy knowing who he is, and I'm not gonna tell him. I'm curious about the kind of man he is."

"Chris, he's not someone that I want to be thinking about," Alexis frowned, "It's over. It was hard to walk away, but it had to be done."

"Allie, you can talk to me," he encouraged. "I'm not gonna go blabbing secrets around town."

"That's not it," she replied. "Look, it ended badly. I just want to close the door on that chapter of my life and look forward to this new one...this life I'm building here with my baby boy, and hopefully with you."

"Oh, you ain't getting rid of me so easy," he smiled at her.

"Good," she smiled.

"But," he started.

"You want to know about him," Alexis said.

"Yeah," he nodded, "I want to know what kind of man he is. Obviously he's not all that intelligent for allowing you to leave."

"Hey, that's not fair," Alexis scowled at him.

"Okay, we're getting somewhere," Christopher smiled at her. "You still want to defend him."

"What do you want to know?" Alexis gave in.

"As much as you can tell me," he replied.

"Well, his name is Kevin Ryan," she started. "I first met him when I was fifteen."

"I know he's older, so please tell me you weren't sleeping with him back then or I'm gonna have to travel up north and take a belt to his punk ass," Christopher said.

"No, no, no," she responded quickly, "He was just a friend of my dad's for a long time. We didn't get together until about a year ago."

"How'd it happen?"

"We were just friends at first. He was going through a bad time, and I was willing to listen and not judge."

"Then..." he prodded her.

"Then it was just this one night moment of weakness that wouldn't...couldn't end."

"Is he a writer like your dad?"

"No, he's a cop. NYPD detective," Alexis nodded. "I guess I have a thing for cops."

He smirked in reply.

"He's a good guy," she sighed, "But it was doomed from the start."

"Because he's married?"

"And Irish Catholic," Alexis shook her head. "Not to mention he has a suspicious wife who hired a P.I."

"She found out," he concluded.

"And told me if I didn't end it, she'd take their daughter and disappear."

"I'm guessing her threats were real enough to not risk it, for your fella's sake."

"I know she would have followed through."

"Can I say I'm glad you chose here to escape to?"

"Yes," she reached for his hand.

He took hers and when her feet landed on either side of him, he knelt before her.

"Christopher?" Alexis looked at him curiously.

"I love you, Alexis," he brought her hands to his lips and kissed them softly, "This child might not be mine, but I want to give him what his biological father cannot. What's more, I want to give you what he cannot. I want us to be a family."

"Are you asking me to..."

"Alexis Kathleen Castle, will you marry me?"

Alexis was grateful that she was seated or she would have fainted dead away. She never expected to feel this way about someone so soon after the heartache she felt when she first arrived in New Orleans. So many thoughts floated through her as his words rang through her ears.

"Allie?"

"Yes," she nodded. "Yes."

Chris produced a ring from his pocket and slipped it onto her fingers before kissing her.

"I love you," she murmured.

"I love you more," he smiled against her lips.

She giggled, "You do realize that marrying a Yankee means you might have to travel north of the Mason-Dixon Line every once in a while, right?"

"No, I didn't," he twisted the ring around her finger, "Maybe I should take this ring back and find someone else to wear it."

"Don't even think about it," Alexis snatched her hand back.

He laughed out before kissing her again.

-d-d-d-d

When we get to 210, you all get the next regular chapter. Thanks for reading.


	29. Chapter 14

Eleven replies in 2 hours? I love you guys. Keep it up! I mean that.

-d-d-d-d-

 _Previously on Castle:_

 _In 2015, Alexis, a senior at Columbia University, and Kevin, detective for the NYPD, embarked on a whirlwind love affair that was doomed from the start. Not only is one of Kevin's best friends, Alexis's father, but he's still married, and devoted to giving his two year old daughter a true family. Despite his deep love for the woman he'd known since she was fifteen, he can't leave his wife._

 _While mourning the loss of her beloved grandmother, Alexis receives a surprise visit from a very angry, Jenny Ryan. She knows about the affair and threatens to take Sarah Grace and disappear if Alexis doesn't end her relationship with Kevin permanent. Heartbroken, Alexis tells Kevin that she's been accepted to medical school at Tulane University in New Orleans and that she intends to leave New York and him for good. She leaves with one gigantic secret; she's pregnant with Kevin's child._

 _Eight months later, Kevin finds out, not that Alexis had his child, but that she's a married woman. Crushed, Kevin does what he best to mask his pain, but inside he dies a bit more each day._

 _In 2023, Alexis is happily married to an NCIS agent she met in New Orleans, Chris LaSalle, who helped her raise her son, Hunter, along with their two children, Cade and Maggie. Alexis finished medical school and worked for NCIS as a medical examiner. Sadly tragedy strikes again, as Chris was killed in a building explosion with Alexis right outside._

 _Forced to pick up the pieces of her life yet again, her father convinces her to return to New York with her family. Taking over for the retiring medical examiner, Sidney Perlmutter, she becomes a medical examiner for the city of New York, working alongside her mentor, Lanie Parrish._

 _Kevin has been living in a fog since Alexis left New York City. He's still married to Jenny, but he's miserable. The misery is compounded when he realizes that Alexis's oldest child is his son. Alexis's return to NYC causes the fog to slowly lift, and he comes to life once more. All the old feelings are still there. He's determined to reestablish a friendship with Alexis, though he's hoping for more. He finally follows his heart and asks Jenny for a divorce._

 _Slowly Alexis and Kevin grow close. Just when things begin to look like they might be on the right path, Kevin finds Alexis is a pool of blood, having been stabbed by an unknown assailant. On the ride to the hospital, Kevin wills her to stay with him._

 _As he waits for news on her condition he begins to remember how it all began and then fell apart._

 _And now back to your regularly scheduled programming_ ~

Kevin wasn't sure how long he'd sat there, waiting for news, while he replayed his and Alexis's relationship in his head but suddenly there was a hand on his arm.

"Kevin? Are you okay?"

He lifted his head to see Kate kneeling down beside him. She looked concerned for him.

"Kevin? Talk to me," Kate said softly.

"I'm going to lose her," Kevin said hoarsely, almost unaware of his words.

"What?" Kate looked confused.

"Alexis. I _finally_ got her back, and I'm gonna lose her all over again," he broke down in a painful sob.

Kate hugged him as he cried. Once he'd calmed down, Kate asked a question.

"Kevin? Did you and Alexis-were you having," Kate couldn't get the words out.

Kevin shook his head. He didn't want to make the confession, not now, not with Alexis fighting for her life. He didn't want Kate to think less of her stepdaughter.

"Kevin," she demanded, "Did you and Alexis have an affair?"

"Eight years ago," Kevin said haltingly. "Hunter's my son."

"He's what?" Kate felt her knees go weak.

"I didn't know until just before Alexis returned to New York," Kevin said as he looked at Kate. "Kate, please don't look at me like that."

"You slept with my stepdaughter," Kate hissed as she found her footing, "Don't tell me how to look at you. Right now, I'm having a very difficult time not wringing your neck."

Kevin got to his feet, "Fine. Wring my neck. Just please don't look at me like I'm a stranger."

"Right now you are," Kate began walking away, "The man I know would never do what you just confessed to doing. You're married. You have a daughter."

"I'm getting a divorce."

"Congratulations," she kept going, desperately needing fresh air.

"Kate, wait a second," Kevin finally caught up to the brunette as she cleared the ambulance bay doors.

"Is it something about the investigation?" Kate turned towards him with an impatient look about her.

"No," Kevin shook his head. "I know you're mad."

"My stepdaughter was stabbed in the lab where she works. You're damn right, I'm mad."

"That's not what I'm talking about," Kevin shook his head.

"We're not talking about that right now. I'm still trying to process the image of you and Alexis, someone we've both known since she was _fifteen_ , having sex."

"It just happened," Kevin stated.

"It just happened," Kate snapped, "Something like that doesn't just happen."

"You may not believe me, but I love her, Kate," Kevin said quietly.

"Look, you're like a brother to me and Castle," Kate took a deep breath to calm herself down, "But you're gonna have to give me time to process this."

"Don't tell Rick. It should come from me or Alexis," Kevin told her.

"Oh, I am in complete agreement with you there. Does Javi know?"

"I told him a while ago when he saw the divorce papers."

"I can't believe you're divorcing Jenny."

"I can't stay with her anymore."

"Because Alexis is back?"

"I let her go once. I won't do it again."

"She's not yours anymore, Kevin," Kate growled.

"I'm working on that," Kevin told her. "Kate, you said I'm like a brother to you and Castle. You're like a sister to me and Castle's a brother, but I'm not letting either of you get in the way."

"If you think that we are going to stand by and let you hurt her, you don't know us at all," Kate responded.

"I'm not gonna hurt her," Kevin shook his head. "I want her back. I didn't want to lose her in the first place."

"She's not yours anymore, Kevin," Kate repeated.

"So you said," Kevin nodded. "But she's also not a child, Kate. She's not that fifteen year old anymore. She's a grown woman with three kids of her own, one of whom happens to be my son."

"I really can't deal with this right now," Kate threw up her hands, "I have an attempted murderer to track down. Are you going to help?"

"Of course I'm going to help," Kevin nodded. "Let's go."

-d-d-d-

"Espo, we got anything?" Kate asked as she and Kevin stepped onto the floor.

"We dusted a random body bag for prints. We're awaiting the lab results. There were a few other random clues, but other than that there is no trace of this assailant."

"How's Dr. LaSalle?" Captain Gates asked.

"Still in surgery," Kate said quietly.

"Ryan, go change," Gates looked to the blood soaked shirt her detective was wearing. "And then give your sweater to CSU."

It was then that Kevin realized how much blood he was covered in.

"Come on, Bro. I got a shirt you can borrow," Esposito led his friend to the locker room after grabbing an evidence bag.

Kevin followed his partner into the locker room.

"You okay, Man?" the Latino asked after making sure they were alone.

"Not really."

"I saw the look on Beckett's face. You told her?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "It just came out in the hospital."

"Does Castle know?"

"No," Kevin shook his head vigorously.

Esposito handed his friend a shirt, "He'll get over it once he does."

"You sure about that?" Kevin took off his sweater and dropped it into the evidence bag Javier was holding out.

"No," he shook his head as he sealed the bag and signed it so that chain of custody was intact. "Look, we're partners. I'm with you 'til the wheels fall off. You want Alexis, I'll stand with you."

"Thanks," Kevin stated, "She has to pull through."

"You should go home."

"I'd just be climbing the walls."

"You're too close to this, Kevin," his partner told him, "Any evidence you find could be tossed out."

"I'll work the phones then," Kevin said. "I can't go to my mom's right now."

"Was she able to say anything to you when we found her?"

"Like what?" Kevin scowled.

"Did she see her attacker? Was she able to describe him at all?" Javier asked, "You were with her while I was on the phone with dispatch."

"No," Kevin shook his head. "She opened her eyes at one point in the ambulance, but that was it. Did Tori get anything from the video?"

"Nothing between you and me leaving to help clear out reception and us coming back."

"Whoever did this knew what he was doing and how to get away with it," Kevin thought out loud, "Professional?"

"Most likely. The thing that bothers me is the empty body bag. It wasn't from the woman Alexis had on the table."

"Body bag…Wait a second. Do you remember that story Kate told us a few years ago? The one about the terrorist who got onto the Naval Yard in D.C. by way of a body bag."

"Yeah, shot the M.E.'s assistant, didn't he?"

"Put a round through his shoulder. The point is, Javi, you can't sneak into autopsy. The swinging door makes too much noise. The only time you can't hear it is if they've got the bone saw going. Lex was doing a trace exam. She wasn't going to open him up until tomorrow. If someone had come through the door, she would've heard it, and she had no defensive wounds."

"Do we have a log of who brought the bodies into autopsy?"

"Call Lanie and find out," Kevin slipped the shirt his partner had given him on. "I'll talk to Kate and Gates."

"Question is, was Alexis the target or someone else?" Javier thought out loud.

"It has to be someone else," Kevin replied, "Lex doesn't have enemies. She wouldn't hurt a fly."

"We're going to have to put some major security on the morgue," Javier stated when he and Kevin left the locker room.

"Beckett, we need to talk," Kevin called over. "Where's Gates?"

"On the phone with 1PP. Major Case wants to stick their nose in."

"The hell we'll let that happen," Javier responded as he picked up the phone to call Lanie, "This is one of our own, we deserve to run point on this."

"She's trying to prevent them taking over. Anyway, what's going on?"

"Do you remember that story you told us a few years ago about the terrorist who snuck onto the Navy Yard by way of a body bag?"

"Yeah," Kate nodded, "I thought it was an urban legend until I met Agent Gibbs. He was the investigating agent on that case."

"What if that's how the guy who stabbed Alexis got in and out?" Kevin theorized. "Think about it. There are cameras in the hallway and by the freight elevator, but none in autopsy. Once a bag clears the elevator, there's no way he could be seen. He unzips the bag, does what he's there to do, pulls a bag over to the shipment of bodies going out to various funeral homes, gets back in, lets himself be loaded into a van, and waits for the opportunity to disappear."

"Interesting theory," Kate replied, "But what's the motive?"

"That's what we're a little sketchy on," Kevin admitted. "I don't think he was there to harm Alexis specifically."

"Then why would he leave before doing what he came to do?" she asked.

"I don't know, but it's a place to start. Maybe he was trying to evade capture, and Alexis was in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Let's start hunting down leads. There was law enforcement everywhere in and around that building. Someone had to have seen something," Kate stated, "Get the logs of all the vehicles going in and out and look for inconsistencies."

"I got one already," Esposito came back over. "Lanie just told me that one of her bags turned up empty at a funeral home."

"Get an address and then get a CSU team out there. Get it dusted for prints and gone over for fibers; inside and out."

"On it," Kevin grabbed his phone.

"Espo, get out there and meet them," Beckett commanded him.

"Done. Kev, text me the address," Esposito grabbed his jacket.

"Kevin, keep hunting up other leads," Kate stated, "I don't want to be chasing dead ends. This case is personal."

"To all of us," Kevin said before he walked back to his desk.

"Is he okay?" Gates asked quietly as she walked up to Kate.

"No," Kate shook her head softly.

"He asked me for a change of marital status card a few weeks ago," Gates said. "Does Dr. LaSalle have anything to do with that?"

"Apparently," Kate nodded, "They were having an affair just before she left for Tulane. He is Hunter's biological father."

"Is he okay to be working this case?"

"I think if I try to send him home, he'll either get plastered or go back to the hospital. Either way, I'll be bailing someone out of jail."

"Keep me posted," Gates requested.

"Yes, Sir," Kate nodded.

As Gates went back to her office, Kate's phone rang.

"Beckett," she answered.

 _"Kate, it's me,"_ Rick's voice came over the line.

"Hey, how is she?"

 _"Made it through surgery,"_ her husband said.

"Thank god," Kate whispered, "What are the doctors saying?"

 _"She's lost a lot of blood,"_ he relayed, _"She was in need of a transfusion."_

"Look, if you want I can come down there."

 _"No. Stay where you are,"_ Rick said. _"Find the son of a bitch who did this and put him somewhere I can never get at him."_

"We're working on it," Kate promised. "Call me if you want to talk or rant. I love you."

 _"I love you, too,"_ Castle replied.

"I'll stop by in a bit to check in," she added.

 _"Okay. About your dad,"_ Rick started.

"He's fine with staying with the kids as long as we need. He's called in Aunt Theresa as back up, and Lanie's promised to go over as soon as she's done helping the CSU team. They're taking inventory to see if anything was taken."

 _"Good,"_ Rick replied, _"I want us to be the ones to talk to the kids about what is going on."_

"I know. He knows too," Kate nodded. "I'll see you soon."

 _"Bye,"_ Rick said as they hung up.

Kate put her phone down and sighed in relief. Then she looked up and over at Kevin.

"She made it through surgery," she said when he looked up.

"That's good news," Kevin gave her a brief smile, "Is she going to pull through?"

"She lost a lot of blood," Kate admitted. "I think right now, it's a waiting game."

"I'm going to head over to the hospital," Kevin grabbed his coat, "I'm just running into dead ends right now."

"Kevin, don't do or say anything you'll regret," Kate cautioned him.

"I won't," Kevin assured her, "I just need to see her."

"Okay. I'll call if we get anything."

"Thanks," he nodded.

"Hey, Ryan, bring Castle some coffee. He sounds like he needs it."

"Done," Kevin smiled as he got in the elevator.

-d-d-d-

Kevin knocked on the door to Alexis's room, causing Rick to look up.

"Coffee?" the Irishman held up the tray he carried.

"Kate send you?"

"I was climbing the walls at the precinct. It was one dead end after another."

"Any leads yet?" Castle asked as he took a cup of coffee.

"Maybe," Kevin nodded. "You'll like this. Our first lead came from that old NCIS story you and Kate told us a few years back."

"Not sure I'll like it considering the victim is my daughter, but what's the lead?"

"The terrorist who snuck onto the Navy Yard in a body bag? We think that's how the guy got into autopsy."

"You're kidding," Castle looked to his friend in disbelief.

"No," Ryan shook his head. "So, how is she?"

"Doctors are optimistic," Castle nodded.

 _I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world…_

Kevin stared at Rick as the older man's cell phone went off.

"It's Meredith. She's trying to get a flight back to New York, but there is a bad storm that has grounded all flights wherever she is," Castle explained. "I'm gonna take this in the hall."

"I'll stay here then," Ryan nodded.

"Thanks," Castle said as he left the room to fill in Alexis's mother.

Once they were alone Kevin picked up Alexis's hand and kissed it gently before he put it over his heart.

"You can't do this to me, Lex," he started, knowing he didn't have a lot of time, "You can't leave me again. I barely survived last time and that was when you were still in this world. If you die, I won't make it this time.

"We have another chance, Alexis, but I need you to stay with me. I know it's not easy and it won't be for a while, but I will be there every step of the way. You just rest up for now, but you come back to me. We're not done yet. And just in case you didn't hear me before, I love you."

Kevin laid her hand back down at her side and kissed her forehead softly.


	30. Chapter 15

Keep up the replies because you know you love us. ;)

=d-d-d-d-d-

Alexis's eyes popped open. She glanced around the foreign room attempting to get her bearings. The last thing she remembered, she was opening a body bag. Her eyes caught a familiar figure, hunched over in the chair next to her bed. With a weak voice she spoke, "Daddy."

Castle's head shot up and despite the exhaustion she could see in his face, he smiled, "Oh thank God. How are you, Sweetie?"

She reached slowly for tubes up her nose, feeding her oxygen, trying to summon the strength to pull them away. "What happened?"

"Let's talk about that later," he waved off the question, "How are you feeling? Are you in any pain?"

"My side," she whispered. "How long have I been asleep?"

"The longest thirty-six hours of my life," Castle told her.

"Where are the kids?" she felt suddenly panicked.

"Jim's got them," Castle assured her. "They're fine. The boys know you were hurt, but Maggie thinks you're just sick."

"What happened?" she asked, "And I don't want any beating around the bush."

"You were stabbed," Castle put his hand over hers. "Honey, do you remember anything?"

"I was in the lab," the fog began to lift, "I was doing a trace exam when I suddenly felt this huge pain. "

"Is that it?" Castle asked.

"Yeah, that's all I remember right now," Alexis chose not to mention Kevin's voice saying he loved her.

"You've had a lot of visitors," Castle let it go for the moment. "Your brothers and sister drew you pictures."

Alexis smiled, "So who's visited?"

"Everyone from the lab," Castle began, "Lanie and Javi, of course, they brought the sunflowers. Kate has been in and out, keeping everyone posted."

"The orange roses?" Alexis asked, "Are those from you?"

"No, actually," Castle shook his head. "They're from Kevin."

Alexis flashed a brief smile.

"Does the old man get the details on what those are all about?"

"Um," Alexis fiddled with the bed sheet. "You've probably done the math on Hunter's birth date and realized I was pregnant when I was in New York."

"If this goes where I think it goes, I'm going to be very angry when you're feeling better," Castle replied.

"Kevin is Hunter's father," Alexis said softly.

"How did that happen?" Castle asked, "Please tell me it was Immaculate Conception."

"Neither of us meant for it to happen," Alexis continued. "I ended it right after Gram died."

"He was married!"

"I know he was married. Trust me, I know all about it."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Close the door," Alexis pointed.

Castle rose to follow her instructions.

"Kevin's wife came to see me just after Grandma died. She told me I had to end things with Kevin, or he'd never see his daughter again," Alexis began after her father sat back down.

"She did what?"

"Two hours before that, I found out about Hunter," Alexis confessed, "I was already freaked out and wracked with grief. When she said that, I just had to get out of New York as soon as possible."

"That's why you left so abruptly," Castle realized, "I thought it had something to do with your grandmother's passing. You two were so close."

"I couldn't let Kevin lose his daughter because of me, and I knew I couldn't stay because he'd find out."

"Does he know now?" Castle asked.

"Yeah, now he knows. He spotted a picture of Hunter on Kate's desk and did the math."

"Does he know about Jenny's ultimatum?" Castle inquired.

"Not yet. I was going to tell him the night I was stabbed. We were going to have dinner and talk. Dad, promise me that you're not going to go off half-cocked and try to kill him."

"I won't kill him," Castle balled up his fist, "But don't be surprised by a few bruises the next time you see him."

"I'm a big girl, Dad," she scowled at him, "I went into the relationship with both eyes wide open."

"You may be a big girl, but you're still my little girl," he reminded her. "Rights of a father still apply."

"Dad," she continued to stare him down, "Anything you do or say to him, you do or say to me."

"I promise not to hit him, but I am going to talk to him."

"Like a rational human being, not an over protective father," she demanded.

"I'll give it my best shot. I better go make some calls."

"Dad, can you call him? I think we need to talk."

"The two of you can talk after you've recovered."

"Dad," Alexis frowned.

"Don't 'Dad' me," he scowled at her.

"Either you call him, or I reach for that phone over there and risk pulling out my stitches," she challenged him.

"And your grandmother's teachings come to the surface," Castle smiled. "I'll call him."

"Thank you," she replied when he pulled out his phone and dialed.

-d-d-d-

"Ryan," Kevin answered the phone on the second ring.

"Kevin, it's Castle."

"How's Alexis?" Kevin asked immediately.

"Why don't you come down and find out for yourself? She says she wants to talk to you."

"I'll be there in twenty," Kevin slammed down the phone and grabbed his jacket.

"Where are you going?" Javier looked up.

"Lex is awake," Kevin smiled.

"Go! I'll call if we get anything."

Kevin grabbed his keys and gun and bolted for the door.

-d-d-d-

Kevin knocked on the door to Alexis's room and poked his head in, "Hey."

Castle and Alexis looked up from their conversation.

"Come in," Alexis invited. "Dad, didn't you want to call Jim and check on the kids?"

"You and I need to have a man to man talk later," Castle gave Kevin a cold stare before he left the room.

"You told him?" Kevin looked to Alexis in surprise.

"He asked about the roses. Thank you, by the way."

"I couldn't help myself," he gave her a sheepish grin.

"Come sit," she scooted a little and then hissed through her teeth.

"Easy there."

"Just a little sore," Alexis winced. "Come sit anyway."

"I don't want to hurt you," he took a seat in the chair her father had just vacated.

Alexis twisted a little so she could face him and put out her hand, palm up.

Kevin took it and kissed it gently, "How are you?"

"A little sore," she lied.

"Don't try that with me," he cautioned her.

"Okay, a lot sore," she admitted. "Any leads?"

"Nothing yet," he confessed. "But I doubt you called me down here to ask me about a case you could have asked your dad about."

"We were going to have dinner," she began, "I told you I had something to tell you about when I left for New Orleans."

"Right," he nodded.

"I found out I was pregnant right after Grandma died," Alexis backtracked.

"Then why did you leave?" he asked, "Did you think I wouldn't support you?"

"Two hours after I found out, Jenny showed up at the door. She was short and to the point. She knew about us and said if I didn't end it with you, she'd take Sarah Grace and disappear."

"She what?" he gasped, his eyes awash with horror for his wife's actions.

"I should have told you," Alexis added, "But I was afraid of what you might do, of what she might do. I never wanted to be the reason you lost your daughter."

"Oh God, Lex, no. It would never have been your fault," Kevin assured her.

"If I'd stayed, she would've left the minute you realized I was pregnant."

"Lex," he began.

"Kevin, I have a gut feeling," Alexis took as deep a breath as she could, "The look in her eyes when she threatened me...I think, or rather, I feel like taking Sarah Grace would have been a last resort. I think my life was in jeopardy."

"I'm not letting her hurt you or take anything else from us," Kevin promised her. "I'll talk to her. There's gotta be some way to reason with her."

"Why do you always see the best in people?" Alexis smiled.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked.

"Do you really think she's the reasonable type?"

"I don't know," he said. "But I have to try. She's still my daughter's mother."

Alexis took a deep breath, "Kevin, she's dangerous."

"I'll be careful," he promised. "You scared me."

"It wasn't my idea," she replied, "I want you to know something. I changed a few things in my will after Christopher died. I gave Kate and Dad custody of the children, but there's always been a provision that you could see Hunter as much as you wanted. There were also instructions that they were supposed to tell you that you were Hunter's father, and that on his sixteenth birthday, he was supposed to be told who you were."

"Chris agreed to that?"

"I know you're not particularly fond of this subject, but he was a good guy. He wanted what was best for all of us. Kev, he wanted me to tell you."

"I've missed so much of Hunter's life," Kevin's eyes welled with tears, "I hate that."

"I know, and I can't apologize enough," Alexis moved her fingers over his wrist.

"I don't blame you, Lex," he closed his eyes and swallowed hard, "You were in an impossible situation, which was my fault. I should have ended things with Jenny as soon as I developed feelings for you."

Alexis pulled gently on his hand. He came close enough so that she could kiss him.

"Thought we weren't going down that road again," he smiled when he pulled away.

"I almost died," she gave a half smirk, "I don't want to waste any more time."

Kevin smiled and then he kissed her a second time.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin took a seat at the bar and motioned to the bartender.

"What'll it be, Detective?"

"Scotch."

"That had better be the first one," Javier ambled up to the bar and sat down next to Kevin.

"Well, it's not the last," Kevin shook his head.

"Is Alexis okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine," Kevin nodded.

"Okay, so what's the problem?"

"We met the other night in the park and we fought. I asked her why she left. She wouldn't tell me. She said she couldn't do that to me, that I didn't know what it would change."

"I take it she did tell you."

"She told me. She was right. I didn't know what it would change."

"What happened?"

"Jenny went to Alexis and told her if she didn't stop seeing me, she'd take Sarah Grace and disappear."

"Oh my God," Javier breathed. "Was this before or after Alexis found out about Hunter?"

"Literally two hours before Jenny went knocking on Alexis's door, Alexis found out about the baby."

"That had to be..." Javi trailed off. He'd always been a little sour with Alexis for not telling Kevin about his son, but this new information changed that a bit.

"Not only did Jenny chase off the woman that I love, she killed eight years that I could have had with my son," Kevin replied.

"And she's never let on that she knew you'd had an affair?"

"No," Kevin shook his head. "How do I look at Jenny again knowing what she did?"

Something suddenly clicked in Javi's head, but he withheld his thoughts for the time being. "You got to confront her. Maybe this can be the thing that finally gets her to sign the divorce papers."

"Yeah, but it's gonna take me a few weeks before I can be in the same room without strangling her," Kevin clenched his fist.

"Maybe it's best to focus on the positives," Javi suggested, "Alexis is awake and apparently there is another chance for the two of you. Don't waste it."

"I'm not going to," Kevin assured him as he thought of the kisses he and Alexis had shared that night.

"You wanna go back to the hospital?" Javi asked, "I can drive you."

"No, Lex was passed out when I left."

"Doesn't mean you can't be there if she wakes up," Javier replied, "I'm either taking you back to the hospital or your mom's place. You choose, but I'm not letting you get loaded."

Kevin spared a glance at his partner and then towards the back of the bar, "I ever tell you about the time I taught Alexis to play pool?"

"If this story ends with the two of you naked, I don't want to hear it," Javier shook his head.

"You're no fun," Kevin frowned.

"Wait a second, what bar did you do this in?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Kevin grinned from ear to ear.

Javier gave the bartender some money and then took Kevin's arm, "Let's go. You can decide where I'm taking you on the way to the car. But not one word about anything resembling you, Alexis, and a loss of clothes."

"Where's your sense of adventure, Partner?" Kevin stumbled along beside Javi.

"I've never thought of Alexis that way," Javier said. "And I don't want to."

"Fine," Kevin replied, "It's your loss."

"Can I ask one question? How did it start?"

"Coffee."

"And when did you realize you wanted to see her...um," Javier looked vaguely sick.

"It didn't really hit me until the night we...you know," Kevin replied.

"You did it at Castle's place, didn't you?"

"You really want me to answer that?"

"No, you're right, I don't want to know," Javier shook off his friend, "And I never want any of those details...ever."

"Hey, just remember how many details I have in my head of you and Lanie," Kevin pointed out.

"So, where am I taking you?" Javier asked as they got in the car.

"I can't go to my mom's like this and I don't want to go to the hospital upset."

"You can sleep on my couch."

"Thanks, Bro," Kevin smiled.

"No problem."


	31. Chapter 16

Kevin looked over at Beckett who was sitting at her desk going over some papers and sighed.

"Whatever you want to ask her, go ask," Esposito prodded his partner.

"This really isn't something I should ask," he frowned, "I don't want her to relive that pain, especially right now."

"I don't follow," Esposito responded.

"Kate and Castle have enough going on," Kevin explained, "With Lex still on the mend, they're watching her kids on top of theirs."

"I'm still confused," Esposito responded.

"It's about Alexis's husband," Kevin replied, "I'm curious, but I don't know how to bring it up. It's so fresh for them, and I know Kate and Rick liked him."

"You're curious about the man who raised your son," Esposito nodded. "Makes sense. I think it'd be okay to ask them."

"Kate just found out that I'm Hunter's father. She's probably still mad that I never told her that I was with Alexis."

"You didn't want to put her in the position of having to lie to Castle. She gets it."

"Not so sure about that," Kevin replied.

"I get it," Kate's voice called from the other side of the room. "Kevin, if there's something you want to know, ask."

"What was Chris like?" Kevin gave in.

Kate pushed away from her desk and walked over to sit next to Kevin's, "He was a good guy, and he loved Alexis. He was also a good father. If I hadn't known, I never would've guessed that Hunter wasn't biologically his. Your son was in good hands and so was Alexis."

"Alexis said he was a federal agent," Kevin prompted her.

"NCIS," Kate elaborated as she leaned back in the chair with a grin. "Did Alexis tell you about the day Hunter was born?"

"We haven't gotten around to that yet," he shook his head.

"Do you want to know or do you want to wait and ask Alexis?"

"I want to know," Kevin replied. "I don't think she would mind if you told me."

"They were stuck at the NCIS office when Alexis's water broke," Kate smiled. "There was no getting to a hospital in time. It was just Alexis, Chris, and Chris's boss, King."

"King?"

"Nickname the local gangs gave him when he cleaned up the neighborhood. He says it's the second proudest day of his life. The first was the day his daughter was born and the third was the day Alexis gave Hunter the middle name 'King'," Kate explained. "She did that because he delivered Hunter. Chris held Alexis's hand and coached her. It took pretty much all night but by the time the sun rose over the gulf, your son was letting out his first cry."

Kevin choked back his emotions.

"He did right by Alexis," Kate stated, "And he was exactly the man she wanted to help raise her son."

"She never talked about Hunter's real father, not at all?"

"She only ever mentioned that it was complicated," Kate replied, "Castle and I didn't want to push."

"I should've gone to Castle the first time I ever thought about touching Alexis," Kevin shook his head.

"And if you'd done that, Castle would've thrown you through the nearest window," Kate told her friend.

"Probably would have deserved it," Kevin shrugged, "Probably still do, actually."

"You'd better learn how to fly, Ryan," Esposito chuckled.

"Alexis and I made Rick promise that he wouldn't do you any harm," Kate smiled. "Look, I know that it's hard for you to think of someone else being a father to your son, but you have to know that Hunter can be yours and Christopher's."

"How is Hunter going to take all this?" Kevin slumped in his chair, "Chris is the only father he's ever known."

"It'll be tough for him, I'm sure," Kate nodded. "But, he does want to be a cop so maybe you start there. Start as his friend."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"He's a good kid," Kate smiled. "Give it some time. In the meantime, do we have anything about the person who stabbed Alexis?"

"Just that he entered autopsy in a body bag," Kevin studied the file.

"Hey, Beckett? There's a Detective Williams downstairs asking for you," a uniform said.

"Danny Williams?" Kate asked.

"You know him?" Kevin looked up from the file.

"I met him a couple of years ago. Let him up," Kate nodded to the uniform.

The officer nodded and went to retrieve the man.

"So, who is he?" Esposito asked.

"He works in Hawaii," Kate said. "One of Chris's cases intersected with one of theirs, and we all ended up in Hawaii. It was more of a vacation for me and Rick. I have no idea what he's doing here."

"I think you're about to find out," Esposito nodded towards the man standing behind Kate.

Kate turned around and smiled, "Danny Williams. How are you?"

"Forget me," Danny gave Kate a quick hug. "How's Alexis?"

"She's awake and getting stronger, thank God," Kate said. "How did you know?"

"It hit the wire last night," Danny explained. "I was in Jersey visiting the family when McGarrett called me."

"Alexis keeps in touch with Kono. I heard about your mom. I'm sorry," Kate frowned.

"Broken heart finally caught up with her," Danny nodded before he caught sight of the two men behind Kate.

Kate followed Danny's line of sight, "Oh right. Danny Williams, these are detectives Kevin Ryan and Javier Esposito."

"Good to meet you," Danny shook both their hands before he turned back to Kate, "There's something else I need to talk to you about and it needs to be privately."

"Interrogation is this way," Kate motioned Danny in the right direction and followed him.

"What do you think is going on?" Javier asked his partner.

"Nothing good," Kevin shook his head. "Observation?"

"No, we'll wait for Beckett to fill us in."

"Alright," Kevin nodded as the phone rang. "Ryan."

" _It's Lanie. Kate's not picking up her cell."_

Kevin looked at his friend's desk, "It's sitting on her desk, and she's in interrogation. What's going on?"

" _We got a match on the prints from the second body bag. Kevin, the guy who stabbed Alexis is a very, very dangerous man. I'm emailing the results over to Gates, you, Javi, and Kate."_

"Alright," Kevin opened his email and saw the message from Lanie. He opened it and the file popped up. "Oh my God."

"What's going on?" Javier asked from over his shoulder.

"Lanie, I'll call you back," Kevin hung up the phone.

"What is this?"

"Lanie got a match on the prints from the body bag. They come back to a Sang Min, an escaped felon who ran a human trafficking ring," Kevin read.

"Why is this guy sneaking into autopsy and stabbing people? He doesn't have any violent crimes," Javier read the file over Kevin's shoulder.

"I got an idea. Let's find the son of a bitch and ask him," Kevin got up and headed for the captain's office. He knocked and Gates admitted him. "Sir, I- Oh I'm sorry."

Gates waved for him to sit down as she talked on the phone, "I appreciate the offer, Governor, but I think we can handle it. Alright. No, I understand. He is? Okay, I will make an introduction. I'll also inform the M.E.'s office. Thank you. Goodbye."

"Castle's connections making an appearance?" Kevin asked after Gates had hung up the phone.

"No, that wasn't our governor," Gates shook her head. "That was the state of Hawaii's governor. I understand we have a detective here from there."

"He's in interrogation with Beckett," Kevin nodded. "Dr. Parrish just emailed us all the fingerprint results from the second body bag."

"That's why the Governor was calling us," Gates nodded. "When Dr. Parrish ran the prints, it set off an alert with the Hawaiian Department of Corrections. He's sending another member of his task force and a medical examiner."

"Are we putting out a BOLO?"

"Absolutely," Gates nodded.

"Wanted for questioning?" Kevin started to jot down the details.

"No. Wanted for the attempted murder of a New York City Medical Examiner," Gates said sternly. "Alert the other boroughs and the surrounding states. I want this bastard in custody as soon as possible."

"Yes, Sir," Kevin nodded as he went to talk to Javi. He found his partner talking to Beckett and Williams at his desk.

"We're at the airport, right?" Danny was saying to them both with a grin on his face, "Alexis gets off the plane, marches right up to McGarrett, and says 'what do you want with my body, Commander?' I'm telling you, I just about fell over from trying not to laugh. That's when I knew I could work with this girl. Anyone who could say that with a straight face to someone she'd never met before is good people."

"I remember that," Kate snorted. "She never reminded me of Martha more than in that moment."

"That is definitely a Mrs. R move," Javier agreed.

"McGarrett didn't know what the hell to say to her at that point," Danny shook his head. "I have a feeling that if she wasn't already spoken for, he'd have made a play for her after he got over his shock."

Kevin cleared his throat at the point.

Kate looked over at Kevin, "What did the Captain say?"

"BOLO," Kevin said.

"Questioning?"

"No. We're not going to mess around. Wanted for the attempted murder of a New York City Medical Examiner," Kevin sat down at his desk and started typing. "She was on the phone with Hawaii's Governor when I went in. Apparently he's sending their medical examiner and another member of your task force."

"That'll be Max and McGarrett. Kono's due any day, and Chin won't leave her since she's on her own," Danny filled in the blanks.

"Where's Adam?" Kate asked.

"It's not a good story," Danny shook his head.

"We'll have a beer when this is over, and you can tell me all about it," Kate said. "If you want to see Alexis, I can take you over."

"Yeah, that'd be good. I never did pay my respects."

"Let's go," Kate said as she grabbed her jacket and phone. She turned to Ryan and Epsosito, "Call if you get anything."

"Will do," Javier nodded. "Good to meet you, Danny."

"You too," Danny nodded as he joined Kate in the elevator.

Javier looked at his partner who was holding onto a pen with a death grip and had to smile, "You okay?"

"Who's McGarrett?"

"Danny's partner," Javier said. "Why?"

"He's coming here and he likes Alexis," Kevin frowned.

"You know your eyes are looking a little green today," Javier grinned.

"That's not funny," Kevin scowled at him.

"What are you worried about?"

"Having to vie for Lex's affection with two pretty boys from Hawaii," he grumbled.

"Danny's from Jersey originally," Javier commented.

"That makes me feel a whole lot better."

"Why don't we go to the hospital and see Alexis? We can keep an eye on the pretty boys."

"We should stay by the phone," Kevin said.

"We have phones," Javier held up his cellphone.

"Yeah, alright, let's go," Kevin grabbed his jacket.

"Just promise me you're not gonna go and deck someone," Javier smirked.

"Keep talking, Esposito, and I'll deck _you_."

"You could try," Javi snorted.

Kevin grinned as they got on the elevator and then frowned, "What do you think this McGarrett guy looks like?"

"Danny said something about a hump," Javier smirked.

"We can only hope."

-d-d-d-d-

Javier and Kevin rounded the corner and came upon Danny having an animated conversation with a taller man in cargo pants with a military posture.

"Who's that?" Kevin asked Javier.

"I don't know."

"Detectives Ryan and Esposito, this is my partner, Steve McGarrett," Danny introduced the boys to the intimidating man standing before them.

"You're McGarrett?" Kevin asked.

"Yeah, why?"

"Not what I was expecting," Kevin scowled at his partner, muttering something about a missing hump.

Javier stuck his hand out, "Javier."

"Steve," he shook the other man's hand.

"Kevin."

"Good to meet you," Steve nodded, "My partner mentioned that you've put out a BOLO. Any hits yet?"

"It just went out," Kevin shook his head.

"Well, Max went over to see your M.E. to see if he could offer any help with the scene," Danny said. "Steve and I were just discussing some arrangements for tonight."

"Arrangements?"

"Sleeping. We have two rooms. Max has one and we have one. Unfortunately neither room has two beds. I won the coin toss," Danny said. "Mr. Navy Seal doesn't want to sleep on the floor."

"I just got off a plane. Why can't you go back to your dad's?"

"That's just what I want to do," Danny said sarcastically, "Sit in traffic on the bridge twice in one day, every day until we find Sang Min."

"Fair point," Kevin shrugged, "Wish I could help, but I don't have a room to spare."

"I do," Javier said. "My couch pulls out. If you don't mind it, you're welcome to stay with me."

"Thank you," Steve shook his hand.

"Can you fill us in on the details of the case?"

"We found Alexis on the floor of autopsy bleeding from two stab wounds to her side," Javier started. "Kevin and I had been out in reception clearing it out. There'd been a high profile body brought in that day and the press was trying to sneak in. When we were done, we went back to autopsy so that Kevin could pick Alexis up for dinner."

"Prints matched an escaped prisoner from Hawaii, which is where you guys come in," Kevin added, "What's your side of the story?"

"Guy's a scumbag of epic proportions," Steve said. "But he's not violent or at least he doesn't do violence for no reason. So, unless Alexis got mixed up in a trafficking ring, what the hell did he have to gain by stabbing her?"

"We're still trying to figure that part of it out," Javier stated, "We're operating under the assumption that Dr. LaSalle was in the wrong place at the wrong time. She just moved back to New York a few months earlier and has no known enemies."

" _She_ has no known enemies," Danny said. "But she was married to an NCIS agent."

"A dead one," Javier pointed out. "And we've been in touch with the NCIS office he worked with. His old partner and their computer expert went through the files. Neither Sang Min or any of his known associates ever crossed their paths."

"So there really is nothing tying Alexis together to the suspect," Steve frowned.

"No," Kevin said quietly. "But I'm going to enjoy finding out why this guy was stupid enough to try and murder an ME in autopsy."

"So am I," Steve agreed.

"She awake?" Kevin asked nodding to the door.

"Yeah. Her dad and Kate went to the cafeteria," Steve said.

"I'm gonna say hi."

"Kev, is that a good idea?" Javier asked quietly.

"I just want to say hi," Kevin assured him. "Why don't you guys get some coffee? I'll meet up with you in a few."

"Keep it brief, Partner," Javier advised him, "Castle could be back at any time, and you two really don't need to get into any shoving matches in the hospital."

"Noted," Kevin nodded.

Steve watched the New Yorker go towards Alexis's room and then turned to Javier, "Are he and Alexis together?"

"He's working on it."

"He's got good taste," Danny nodded. "Good women are hard to find. I was lucky to find one."

"Yeah, me too," Steve smiled.

"How about you?" Danny made small talk with Javier while Kevin went in to check up on Alexis.

"No, can't seem to get it right," Javier shook his head before he looked at Steve, "Did Alexis really ask what you wanted with her body the first time you met?"

"She was talking about a dead one, but yeah," Steve laughed.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin shut the door behind him as he entered Alexis's room.

"You look familiar," Alexis smiled slightly.

"Hey," he leaned down and kissed her forehead. "How are you?"

"Tired," she admitted.

"I won't stay long. I just wanted to see how you were doing," he sat down on her bed so he was facing her.

"I've been better," she replied, "I heard you met Danny."

"And Steve," Kevin nodded. "You really asked Steve what he wanted with your body?"

Alexis snorted in amusement, "It was a dead body, but yeah. Chris always loved that story."

"I'll bet," Kevin smiled a little.

Alexis tilted her head, "You do know they're both married, right?"

"It's been mentioned," Kevin nodded.

"Danny's wife is pregnant and Steve has two children," Alexis smiled as she took Kevin's hand. "And neither of them would ever make a pass at a married woman."

"Then they're better men than I," he frowned.

Alexis tugged him closer, "I wasn't married when you made a pass at me."

"But I was," he kissed her lips softly.

"Stop beating yourself up about that," she scolded him, "It's in the past. Let's move forward."

"I'm trying," Kevin smiled. "We got prints back."

"Danny told me," Alexis nodded.

"Does the name Sang Min mean anything to you? Did you ever encounter him on one of your cases? Did Chris?"

"No, I never heard the name before. If Chris did, he never said anything," Alexis shook her head.

"I figured as much," Kevin replied, "If you remember anything, even if it's something trivial, let one of us know."

"No headway in finding this guy, huh," she frowned.

"None," Kevin shook his head. "We're gonna post a guard outside your door."

"Is that necessary?" Alexis asked.

"I'm not giving this guy another shot."

"They'll have to get past my dad first," she smirked, "He's proving to be better than a watch dog."

"Have you talked to your kids?"

"Hunter and Cade came to see me but Maggie's too young," Alexis shook her head.

"I bet she's missing you something fierce."

"She drew that picture over there for me," Alexis nodded towards the table with the sunny picture.

Kevin smiled at the picture before he looked back at Alexis, "How are the boys taking it?"

"They're a bit scared," Alexis replied, "It's bringing up all that happened with their dad. It's still so fresh."

"I can't even imagine," Kevin shook his head. "I could stop by the loft. Give Jim a break."

"Kev, that's really sweet of you to offer, but please don't," she replied, "Not yet."

"I just meant that I could talk to them, find out how they're doing. Maybe reassure them," Kevin told her.

"They're okay," she assured him, "There are plenty of people looking out for them."

"Okay," Kevin nodded.

"I'm not saying never," Alexis said. "It was non-stop people for days after Chris died. They're already having bad memories. I just don't want to shove anyone else on them right now."

"It's okay," he assured her, "I can wait."

"Why are you being so good about this?"

"You know why," he pressed his lips to her forehead. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Alexis admitted softly. "Promise me you'll be careful and not take stupid chances? This guy just graduated to attempted murder. I don't think he'll hesitate if it comes down to it."

"Don't worry about me," he replied, "I have Javi looking out for me."

"Well, you tell him from me that he better make sure you come back in one piece or he's in big trouble," Alexis smiled as her eyes started to slide close.

"I will. Get some sleep. I'll see you soon," Kevin promised.

-d-ddd-

So yeah, I added in one more show. Don't worry. They won't be staying long.


	32. Chapter 17

Thanks for all the replies. Keep it up.

-d-d-d-d-

"Esposito," Javier answered the phone while looking over some reports on his desk.

Kevin glanced up at his partner, who was apparently having an animated phone conversation with someone on the other end.

"We'll send someone to pick him up," Javi finished up the conversation, "No, don't worry about it. We'll get someone to crack him."

Kevin looked at Kate whose attention was also on Javier and then back at his partner just as the Latino hung up the phone.

"Espo?" Kate prodded.

"That was a Detective Walsh at the Second Precinct. They got Sang Min."

"Are we sure it's him?" Kate looked at the uncertainty written across Javier's face.

"They ran the prints, and they matched. They're sending over a photo," Javier opened his email. "Where's McGarrett?"

"He and Danny went across the street to get some coffee," Kevin chimed in, "They should be back any minute."

"Okay," Javier picked up the phone and dialed. "Hey, Lanie. Is that Max guy around? Yeah, I know. I know. Danny says he's good at his job. If this new lead pans out, he'll be gone in a few days. I'm sending you a picture. Show it to him and ask if he recognizes the guy."

"Lanie and Max not getting along?" Kate asked Kevin.

"You've met him. What do you think?"

"I'll buy her a couple of drinks tonight," Kate smiled.

Javier listened to the rather odd conversation on the other end for a minute when Danny and Steve arrived with coffee in their hands.

"Oh, thank God," Javier said. "Lanie, I'll talk to you later. Yes, we will all buy you drinks. Yes, especially the pretty boys who brought him here."

"Max rubbing your ME the wrong way?" Danny chuckled, "Rubs my wife the wrong way too sometimes."

"He's an acquired taste," Steve smiled. "So, what's up?"

"Is this Sang Min?" Javier pointed to his computer screen.

"Hell yeah, that's the bastard," Steve nodded.

"Who found him?" Danny asked.

"Someone at the Second Precinct," Kate went towards Gates's office to fill her in.

"I'll get a couple of uniforms downstairs to pick him up," Javi picked up the phone to call the desk downstairs.

"No, you don't want to give the guy a chance to slip away," Danny shook his head. "You'll come with us, but Steve and I need to get him."

Kevin grabbed his coat to follow his partner, but Kate held him back after emerging from her captain's office. "It's best for you to stay here."

"Kate," Kevin protested.

"I will tie you to a chair," Kate threatened.

Kevin reluctantly plopped himself down while Javier led Steve and Danny to his car.

"Sorry, Ryan," Kate put a hand on his shoulder, "You're too close to this. I don't want you doing something that could jeopardize your badge."

"I know," Kevin nodded. "Did you see Lex today?"

"Had coffee with her this morning," Kate nodded. "She's getting better."

"I want to be able to tell her that we found the man responsible for her attack," Kevin tapped nervously at the desk. "I want her to feel safe again."

"Why don't you go do that?"

"Yeah?" Kevin looked toward Kate curiously, "Castle won't tackle me?"

"We haven't really talked about it," Kate admitted, "He's so focused on Alexis's recovery. I'm pretty sure that's a conversation we'll be having in the near future."

"Kate, I know it can't be easy for you not telling Castle that you knew before he did. Thanks," Kevin said.

"I didn't do it for you, Kevin," she replied, "I did it for Castle."

"Right, but thank you anyways," Kevin smiled. "I want to marry your stepdaughter, you know that right?"

"Let's take things one step at a time," Kate frowned, "I still haven't completely forgiven you. That's going to take time, but I also believe that you have the right to see Alexis."

"Thanks," Kevin nodded. "I'm going to wait until that guy is here and then go to the hospital."

"Kevin, go see her," Kate encouraged him, "I'll call you when he's in the building. I think it's best that you stay as far away from this as possible."

"Yeah, okay," Kevin agreed. "Good luck, Kate."

Kate watched the younger detective gather his things and then head towards the elevator. She picked up her phone and called her husband.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin knocked on Alexis's door and waited.

"She's resting," Rick greeted him and stood in the doorway to block Kevin's entrance.

"Dad, let him in," they heard Alexis's groggy voice.

Rick paused and then stepped aside to admit Kevin.

"Hey," Alexis smiled at him.

"Hey," he brought her hand to his lips, "How are you feeling?"

"I'm so ready to go home," Alexis replied.

"What are the doctors saying?"

"Physical therapy first and then we talk about her going home," Castle smiled.

"Physical therapy hardly seems necessary," Alexis huffed, "They're just looking to pad their hospital bill."

"Listen to the doctors," Kevin sat on the bed next to her.

"He says to the doctor," Castle kidded.

"Any progress on the case?" Alexis asked.

"Some," Kevin felt his phone begin to vibrate. He quickly looked at the caller ID. "That's Beckett. I got to take this."

Alexis nodded as Kevin stepped into the hall.

"Beckett?"

 _"He's in custody,"_ Kate stated, _"Danny and Steve are handling the interrogation. Javi and I will be observing."_

"Okay, thanks for calling," Kevin nodded. "I'll let Lex and Castle know."

 _"Ryan, Gates wants to put you on administrative leave until this case is resolved,"_ Kate responded.

"What!" Kevin exclaimed, "What for?"

 _"She's concerned about you,"_ Kate replied, _"She's worried about your state of mind right now."_

Kevin looked at the ceiling and sighed, "I get it. I'll be back in the station in a few."

 _"Take your time,"_ Kate responded.

"I just have to talk to Lex and Castle."

 _"I'll call you if the 5-O guys get anything before you get here,"_ Kate assured him.

Kevin stepped back into Alexis's room. "We have a man in custody whose prints match those of the man that was in the body bag recovered at the scene. We're pretty confident that he's the man that attacked you."

"Oh," Alexis looked shocked. "Wow."

"You're sure?" Rick asked.

"Pretty sure," Kevin nodded. "Castle, can I have a minute?"

"Uh, sure," Rick reluctantly allowed Alexis and Kevin a few minutes alone.

Kevin took his jacket off and slipped out of his shoes before he got in bed with Alexis and put his arms around her, "Talk to me."

"I don't get it," Alexis's head came to rest against his chest, "I don't understand how this all happened. How is this guy from Hawaii involved in all of it?"

"We don't know yet," Kevin shook his head before he pressed a kiss to the back of her head.

"This guy is going to pay right?" Alexis asked, "They aren't going to deal down to get a confession?"

"Guess it depends on what else this guy knows," Kevin replied.

"I got my dad to bring me my laptop. I looked this guy up. Kevin, he's seriously bad. Promise me you will be careful."

"I'm not allowed within five feet of this guy. Beckett threatened to tie me to a chair when I tried to pick him up."

"That doesn't sound like a promise, Kevin," Alexis replied, "I'll tie you to a chair myself until I get it."

"That would require you getting out of this bed and being able to stand for more than five minutes without feeling pain."

"That still doesn't sound like a promise, Detective," she glared at him, "I'm sure I can convince my dad to help me out."

"I promise," Kevin smiled.

"Good," she pecked at his cheek.

"How you sleeping?"

"Okay," she nodded. "You?"

"I want the truth, Lex," he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I'm having nightmares," she admitted.

"I'm sorry, Babe," Kevin murmured. "Anything I can do?"

"Sleep with me?" Alexis half-joked.

"Tempting," he snorted, "But I'm pretty sure your father would beat me six ways to Sunday if I even attempted it."

"I think you could take him," she giggled, "You do carry a gun after all."

"I miss this," he said without thinking.

"What? Me being in the hospital?" Alexis looked at him.

"Holding you like this," he clarified.

"It has been a while," Alexis nodded and then smiled.

"What?"

"Do you remember that time on the roof when we snuck out of a party my dad was having for his latest book release?"

"Refresh my memory," he rubbed circles gently into her back, doing his best to avoid her wounds.

"We didn't fool around, but we did do some star gazing until my grandma texted to warn us that people were starting to realize we were gone."

"I still can't believe she knew and never said anything," Kevin replied.

"She liked you," Alexis shrugged. "And she trusted me to know when it was time to say goodbye."

"I'm sorry that day ever came," he frowned.

"Have you talked to her yet?"

"To Jenny?" he asked, "Just a few brief moments when I drop off or pick up Sarah Grace."

"Still working on not strangling her?"

"Yeah," he nodded.

"I'm sorry," Alexis shook her head. "I kept it to myself for so long because I didn't want to change the way you saw her."

"It's good that I know," Kevin replied, "It makes what's happening a little easier to swallow. I'm not the only bad guy anymore."

"You were never the bad guy," Alexis shook her head as her eyes started to slide closed.

"Maybe not to you," he replied.

Alexis smiled and tipped her head back on reflex to find a home on Kevin's shoulder.

"Get some sleep," he coaxed her into resting.

"Come back tomorrow?" she mumbled.

"Of course," he assured her. He waited several minutes until she was sound asleep before he slipped from the bed and gathered his belongings.

He bent down and brushed his lips across her forehead, "I love you, Lex."

Alexis muttered a reply in her sleep, but he was unable to make it out. He didn't need to. He knew what was in her heart.

-d-d-d-d-

"This is nicer than that hole back in Hawaii," Sang Min smiled at Danny and Steve.

"Yeah, well, don't get too comfortable," Danny replied, "We'll be back there soon enough."

"So, what am I supposed to have done?"

"The current charge is attempted murder on a doctor at the New York City morgue," Steve read from the file he'd brought with him, "I've read your file backwards and forwards. You're a despicable human being, but you're not a murderer. Why the sudden leap forward?"

"You're implying that I'm guilty," Sang Min responded calmly, "Last I checked, this was still America, where we're all innocent until proved guilty."

"You know, I know a couple of Feds," Steve started. "They work with NCIS, and there's this old story about a terrorist named Ari Haswari sneaking into the Navy Yard by way of a body bag."

"Fascinating," Sang Min rolled his eyes. "What's this have to do with me?"

"Your prints are all over two body bags. One was found right by the victim's body and the other was an empty one pulled from the coroner's van," Danny said flatly.

"The uniforms that arrested you found a knife," Steve added, "How much do you want to bet that when it's checked against the wounds of the victim that it's a perfect match?"

"Why are we bothering with this hump? Once all the tests come back, all we have to do is fight for extradition."

"We got enough to charge you," Steve replied, "Why should you take the fall all by yourself? You had help, you might even have some financing. Shouldn't they pay just like you?"

"Deal," Sang Min demanded.

"What do you have that we want?" Danny asked.

"That sweet little doctor was the target," Sang Min smiled.

"She was what?" Danny looked at the suspect in bewilderment, "What was she to you?"

"Deal first," Sang Min responded, "Then I'll sing."

"We'll see about that," Steve pulled Danny from the room.

A uniform went into the room to keep an eye on Sang Min.

"Now comes the fun part. I'll call Hawaii, you call New York," Steve said to Kate.

"Yeah," Kate nodded. "Does the Hawaii DA like you?"

"She actually likes Chin better."

"Make the call," Kate replied.

"Yeah," Steve took his cell phone out and dialed as Kate went to her desk and did the same.

"You okay?" Danny asked Esposito.

Javier shook his head, "The other night Kevin told me why Alexis left. His wife threatened to take their daughter if she didn't leave."

"His wife knew of the affair?" Danny asked for clarification. When Javier nodded, he asked, "Is she capable of something like this? Does she have the financial resources?"

"I've known Jenny a long time. I was standing right over there the day Kevin proposed. The night she had Sarah Grace, Kevin and I nearly burned to death. I hate the idea that I'm having right now."

"Is she capable of this?" Danny repeated.

"Yeah," Javier nodded reluctantly, "She might be."

Kevin arrived to a whirlwind of activity.

"Ryan, we need to run a financial history on your wife," Danny pounced on him immediately.

"Danny," Javier shook his head to stop the over eager officer. "Kev, let's talk."

"What's happening?" Kevin asked when Javier pulled him into the break room. "What am I missing?"

"Sang Min said Alexis was the target. He and she have never crossed paths, meaning that someone had to hire him."

"What does that have to do with Jenny's financials?" Kevin asked.

"Kev, is it possible that she has money stashed away somewhere? Maybe a rainy day or emergency fund?" Javier pressed.

"You think Jenny-" Kevin couldn't get the words out.

"Jenny is the only person that comes to mind that has a grudge against Alexis," Javier responded.

"What if Alexis is the target because of her grandfather?" Kevin challenged, "Remember when she was kidnapped and flown to Paris? That was because of him."

"They'd do it themselves," Javier said quietly. "They wouldn't hire it out to a human trafficker."

"No," Kevin continued to resist what was becoming abundantly clear, "This isn't the woman I married. She wouldn't do something like this."

"Did you think she'd have ever threatened to take your daughter if Alexis didn't get the hell away from you?"

Kevin stopped and took a deep breath, "Oh my God."

"Nothing is for certain," Javier responded, "But it might be a good idea for you to get Sarah Grace before Jenny tries to run."

"Did you get any kind of description from this guy?"

"Not yet. He wants a deal. Beckett and Steve are talking to the DA's."

"They can't seriously be talking about a plea deal," Kevin scoffed, "He tried to kill the love of my life."

"He gives up the person who hired him, there's a good chance he gets to breathe free air again," Javier theorized.

"No, that's unacceptable."

"Kev, you don't get a say in this," Javier reminded him.

"This job sucks sometimes," Kevin growled.

"Yeah, I know," Javier nodded. "Gates is looking over here. I think she wants to see you."

"Yeah," he nodded, "She wants to put me on administrative leave. If Jenny's involved, there's no way I can talk her out of this."

"At least it would be paid administrative leave," Javier reminded him.

"Yeah," Kevin went towards Gates's office and knocked. "You wanted to see me?"

"Close the door and have a seat," Gates nodded.

Kevin followed instructions but spoke before his Captain could, "How long do you want me on administrative leave?"

"Right now we're looking at a couple of weeks," Gates replied, "Pending investigation it might be longer."

"Am I under investigation, Sir?" he asked.

"Of course not," Gates assured him.

"Thank you, Sir," Kevin smiled as best he could. "What are the lawyers saying?"

"They're looking at making a deal," Gates replied, "Depending on how cooperative Sang Min is not only in our investigation, but also with how helpful he is in bringing down the trafficking ring that he's a part of."

Kevin nodded, "So, he's valuable?"

"He might be," Gates nodded. "If the D.A. can break up a major trafficking ring, they are going to do so, no matter our objections."

"Is he still in the interrogation room?"

"Don't you even think about going in there," Gates warned.

"Just observation," Kevin promised. "I just want to see him."

Gates walked with him to interrogation to make sure he kept his promise.

Kevin looked at Sang Min through the one way mirror and fought the urge to shoot the glass out for a clear shot at him.

"He will be doing some hard time," Gates vowed, "He will not be getting away scot free."

"He could've killed her. If Javi and I had taken longer in reception, she'd be dead."

"Focus on the positives, Detective," Gates advised him.

Kevin handed Gates his gun and badge as was protocol for administrative leave.

"You'll get these back as soon as possible," she assured him.

"Right," Kevin nodded. "I need to get out of here before I do something I won't regret tomorrow."

"You shouldn't be by yourself."

"I have to get my daughter."

"Do you want someone to go with you?" Gates asked carefully.

"No," Kevin responded, "Sarah Grace should be getting out of school soon. I'll pick her up there. I'll just call Jenny on the way."

"Alright. Stay in touch with us, Detective," Gates advised. "We're here if you need us."

"I will," he nodded and headed out.

=d=d=d=d=d=

Dun-dun-dun… Tune in next time.


	33. Chapter 18

"We know from Alexis's confession to Kevin that Jenny knew about the affair," Javier proposed his theory in the bullpen to Kate and Danny, "If she was willing to go to the lengths of virtually kidnapping her daughter to keep her relationship with her husband, is it much of a leap to think that she'd take out Kevin's mistress when she returns to New York"?"

"That mistress is my stepdaughter," Kate growled.

"Sorry," Javier apologized. "Kate, just think about it. Kevin leaves Jenny for Alexis. What would you do if Castle left you for a younger woman?"

"Probably castrate him and make sure I get full custody of our children," Kate responded.

"Are you sure you and Rachel aren't related?" Danny asked.

"Only child," Kate smiled.

"Let's get this guy in a room with a sketch artist. We'll see how it all plays out before we jump the gun. Where's Ryan?"

"He went to pick up Sarah Grace at school," Javi responded, "Barely got the sentence out when he called Jenny. Thought he was going to reach into the phone and strangle her."

"Tori's got that new sketch artist program she's dying to try it out," Kate got up. "Danny, Castle wants to know if you and Steve want to have dinner with us before you head home."

"Who's cooking?"

"We both are."

"Is that good or bad?" Danny asked Javi.

"They're both good cooks," Javi smiled.

"I'll run it by McGarrett, but I'm game," Danny replied.

"Good. We owe you a meal for the time you took us to the shrimp truck."

"Shrimp truck?"

"You should see the guy who owns it," Kate shook her head.

"Good old Hawaiian with a flare for shrimp," Danny chimed in.

"And huge," Kate nodded as she poked her head into the tech room. "Tori? Grab the laptop and that new artist rendering program you have."

"Really," Tori lit up in excitement. She'd been more than a little anxious to take her new toy for a spin.

"Yeah. Also, wear that oversized sweatshirt you wore in this morning," Kate said after getting a look at Tori's shirt. "This guy's a sleaze. We're not giving him a thrill."

"Noted," Tori grabbed her NYPD sweatshirt and zipped it up before grabbing her laptop. "Where is he?"

"Interrogation. You want me to go with you or is the uniform enough?"

"Uniform is plenty," Tori assured her, "I got no trouble dropping him if it gets out of control."

Kate nodded and showed Tori into the room, "Okay, this is Tori. You're going to tell her what the person who hired you looks like, and she's going to come up with a rendering."

"Shouldn't be too hard," Sang Min looked Tori up and down, "I was intimately familiar with this woman, if you get my drift."

"Officer Mulligan here is going to stay with you. If you so much as breathe wrong on Tori, he gets to shoot you."

"I'm not going to be graced with your presence?" Sang Min gave Beckett a quick once over, "What a pity."

Kate rolled her eyes and looked at Mulligan, "One wrong move, take out a knee cap."

"With pleasure, Detective," Mulligan smiled.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Kate filled out some paperwork. As she put it aside, Tori came out of interrogation.

"Tori?"

"I need a shower," she looked mildly disgusted. "And we might have a problem."

"What kind of problem?" Kate inquired.

"Does she look familiar?" Tori showed Kate the sketch on her laptop she'd created at Sang Min's direction.

"Crap," Kate sighed. "Can you print this out for me?"

"Of course," Tori hit a few buttons, "You don't seem all that surprised. This is Ryan's wife, isn't it?"

"Keep this to yourself, okay, Tori?" Kate requested. "I know it'll be all over the station soon, but for now, let's keep it as quiet as we can."

"My lips are sealed," Tori zippered her lips.

"Thanks," Kate took the printout and went to Gates's office. "Sir? Do you have a moment?"

"That depends on what's in your hand," Gates replied when Kate closed the door and took a seat.

"We had Tori sit with Sang Min after his deal came through and got an artist rendering of the person who paid him to stab Alexis."

"I'm not going to like this, am I?" Gates read Kate's somber expression.

Kate handed the picture over, "It's Jenny Ryan."

Gates released a heavy sigh, "I knew this was coming. Call the judge. Get a warrant for her arrest. Luckily Detective Ryan was retrieving their daughter, so she won't have to witness her mother's arrest."

Kate nodded, "We need to tell Kevin this is happening."

"He was going to call once he dropped Sarah Grace off at his mother's," Gates replied, "I'll break the news."

"You're sure?"

"I realize you and he are friends, but it might be better coming from someone who isn't a friend."

"Yeah, maybe you're right," Kate nodded.

"You should tell Commander McGarrett and Detective Williams that they'll be able to take their prisoner home soon."

"They're waiting for the extradition paperwork to go through," Kate replied, "Probably have a couple of days, unless Min fights it, then who knows how long they'll be sticking around."

"How's Dr. LaSalle?"

"Much better," Kate smiled.

"Make your calls and then go be with your family, Detective."

"Will do, Sir," Kate nodded, "I'm a phone call away if you need anything."

"Thank you, Detective."

Kate closed the door as she left the office and Gates picked up her ringing phone, "Captain Gates."

" _Captain, this is Lieutenant Green from the fifteenth,"_ a man quickly identified himself, _"I'm calling regarding Jenny Ryan. I understand she's married to a detective in your ranks. We just busted her trying to buy some meth from one of our undercovers. We thought we'd give you a chance to take care of things in-house, rather than us sending her through the system."_

"Meth?" Gates was suddenly very glad she was sitting down. "You're sure it's the Jenny Ryan married to my detective?"

" _We are,"_ Lieutenant Green assured her. _"What do you want us to do with her?"_

"I'm going to send a couple of uniforms over to get her," Victoria said. "I'd appreciate if you could keep this quiet'."

" _Sure thing, Captain,"_ the lieutenant replied, _"This thing happens more than I'm sure anyone would like to admit."_

"You have no idea," Gates said before she hung up. She called the desk and instructed the sergeant to send two of the uniforms over to the fifteenth to pick up Jenny. Getting up with a deep breath, she went to the door and opened it, "Esposito?"

"Sir?" Javi looked up from the records he was pouring through.

"I just received a call from the fifteenth," Gates approached his desk. "Jenny Ryan was picked up. I need you to get a search warrant."

"Couldn't we just ask Kevin for the key?" Javi asked, "Save us the trouble of a warrant."

"Detective Ryan no longer lives there. I'm not giving a defense attorney a loophole to wiggle through."

"I'll call the judge," Javi picked up the phone and dialed.

"It was a drug charge," Gates said quietly.

Javi nodded understanding and relayed the request to the judge's clerk.

Gates went back into her office as Danny and Steve stepped off the elevator.

"Espo, you had the cheese steak, right?" Danny called.

"Perfect timing, gentlemen," Gates replied, "We need a few hands to serve a search warrant. We're two pairs short. Governor gave you special privileges, right?"

"Yes, Sir," Steve nodded, having picked up on the fact that Gates liked being called 'Sir'. "We brought you a shrimp sandwich."

"Thank you," she replied, "Detective Esposito is working on the warrant. You gentlemen up to getting your hands dirty?"

"We're in," Danny nodded after a glance at Steve.

"Eat up," Gates instructed them, "We should have the warrant quickly."

Danny and Steve made themselves comfortable around Espo's desk as they ate.

With the warrant in hand, the trio set out for Jenny Ryan's apartment.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin staring out the window after Gates delivers the news, "There were drugs in the apartment where my daughter lives?"

"I'm sorry, Detective, yes, there were," Gates confirmed.

"Where did they find them?"

"In the back of a nightstand drawer in the master bedroom," Gates said.

"Damn, I should have known about this," Kevin frowned, "I was a narcotics officer for pity sake."

"Don't blame yourself," Gates said. "Addicts are good at hiding things."

Kevin released a resigned sigh. "Did the boys find anything on that potential other issue?"

"They went through her cell phone. The number for Sang Min's burner phone was in the memory."

"Sang Min was dealing right?" Kevin asked, "Any chance he was just her drug connection?"

"We have officers questioning people at the bar where Sang Min was picked up."

"Yeah, good," Kevin nodded.

"Detective, there is something else?" Gates was hesitant to add.

"No," Kevin shook his head. "No."

"Can I call anyone for you?"

"I think I need to take a walk," Kevin responded.

"You'll need to talk to her eventually," Gates told him.

"I need a few days," Kevin replied.

"I understand. Have you seen Dr. LaSalle yet?"

"Not today," he shook his head.

"It might make you feel better."

"Unless Castle strangles me," Kevin replied.

"I think Beckett will keep him at bay."

"Yeah, maybe I'll swing by," Kevin nodded, "Thanks for keeping me in the loop."

"Of course," Gates nodded.

As Kevin left Gates's office Javier stopped him, "You might want to stay here for a few."

"What's going on?"

"They picked Jenny up. She was on her way to 'your mother's."

"Does Sarah Grace know anything?"

"No," Javier shook his head. "I did call your mother to tell her some details and to let her know to keep the TV off."

"I can see it now," Kevin shook his head. "Detective's wife hires scum bag to off the other woman. Details at six."

"You can't think about that," Javier replied.

"How can I not think about it?"

"You followed your heart," Javier reminded him, "I can't blame you for that."

"I've never hit a woman before. I've never wanted to hit a woman before. Trust me, my sisters gave me ample reason growing up," Kevin said. "But when I think about what Jenny did and what she tried to have done, Javi, I swear I..."

"I know," Javier nodded.

"How is someone capable of this?" Kevin asked to no one in particular.

Javier put his hand on Kevin's shoulder, "Maybe you should go to the hospital or 'to your mother's place."

"I need to hear her say it," Kevin shook his head.

"Alright," Javier nodded and then followed Kevin across the floor to interrogation.

Kevin stopped outside the door, "I don't think I'm going to be in any condition to drive myself anywhere after this. You'll be here?"

"I'll be waiting right here," Javier assured him. "Be careful."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded as he walked across the floor and let himself into interrogation. He shut the door behind him and faced Jenny. "There are a few things I want to know. The first is, did you know about Hunter when you threatened Alexis with my losing Sarah Grace if she didn't end things with us?"

"You think I'm guilty," Jenny looked to her husband in disbelief.

"I know you're guilty, Jen," Kevin walked across the room. "Beckett got hold of Alexis's phone records from the night she left New York. Right after she told me it was over, she called you."

"All that proves is that I knew of your affair."

"Yeah, I know you knew. You had the pictures you paid some PI to take in an envelope taped to the bottom of your dresser," Kevin sat down.

"You're the one that had the affair, yet I'm the one that is seen as the heartless bitch," Jenny spewed her venom, "You didn't give a damn about anyone but yourself."

"I went about things the wrong way," Kevin admitted. "I should've manned up and told you I wanted out the first time I even thought about touching Alexis. But if you think I didn't care about anyone but myself, you're wrong. If that was the case, I would've left a long time ago."

"You should have kept your hands and your prick to yourself, you bloody bastard," she hissed, "None of this would have happened if you'd been a real man that took responsibility for his family."

"I did take responsibility for my family. I stayed because I didn't want to put Sarah Grace through what would've been a seriously nasty divorce," Kevin returned. "Speaking of family, you never answered my question. Did you know about Hunter when you threatened Alexis?"

"How could I possibly know about Hunter?" she scoffed.

"You knew," he realized as he read the look in her eyes. "You had that damn PI following us both. He probably followed her right to the doctor's office. Is that what made you threaten Alexis? You knew if I knew she was pregnant, I'd leave you."

"I did what I did for our family, for our daughter," Jenny's eyes turn cold, "I fought for our family, something that you never did. This slut was nothing special. I did you a favor."

"Nothing special? She was a better person than you by the time she was sixteen than you could ever pray to be," Kevin said coldly. "As for doing me a favor, I lost eight years with my son! I missed the day he came into this world. I didn't see his first step or hear his first word. You robbed me of it all."

"I saved you from all of that," Jenny scoffed, "I saved her. How long would it have been before you did to her what you did to me? You don't know how to treat a woman. You certainly can't please one."

"Oh, is that a shot at the nearly non-existent sex life we've had for the last eight years? I'm sorry I had to be plastered to get in the mood."

Jenny gave a bitter laugh in reply, "So did I."

"No, you had to be high," Kevin tossed a picture of a dime bag on the table. "I have to say, I'm really ashamed of myself. I worked narcotics for how many years, and I never realized I was living with an addict."

Jenny gave him a wicked smile, "So my secret is out. Good. Want to know another one?"

"Do tell," Kevin encouraged.

"There's more coming," she grinned.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You think I hired just one person," she cackled, "She'll never be safe, never."

"You're lying," Kevin's heart was gripped with ice.

"Do you really want to take that chance?"

"If anyone ever takes another shot at Alexis, you will never see Sarah Grace again."

"You won't let me see her ever again anyways, so what do I have to lose?"

"I am willing to give her some kind of relationship with you, Jenny. You're her mother. I swear, if you're serious about this, until she is eighteen and can decide for herself, you will have no contact with her."

"Prove me wrong," she raised a brow.

"Think about this for a second, Jenny. Do you really want the last memory that Sarah has of you to be the day you're found guilty and led out of the courtroom?"

Tears began to trail down Jenny's cheeks.

"Is there anyone else coming after Alexis?" Kevin stared her down.

Jenny closed her eyes and shook her head, "No."

"Swear to me," Kevin demanded, "Swear to our daughter. Is there anyone else coming after Alexis?"

"No, I swear to you and Sarah Grace," Jenny said. "There is no one coming after Alexis."

Kevin swallowed hard. He didn't fully take Jenny at her word. He would comb through every record he could find to make sure that Alexis was safe.

"Just tell Sarah Grace that her mother loves her," Jenny begged as Kevin stood up.

"I will," he nodded. "I'm sorry, Jenny. I'm sorry for the affair. I'm sorry you got hurt, but I won't be sorry for falling in love with Alexis."

There was really nothing Jenny could say to that so she just looked at the table in front of her as she sobbed.

Kevin left the room, and Javier met him in the hallway.

"Your mom called me. Sarah Grace is asleep. I'll take you to see your girl," Javier said.

"Thank you," he placed a hand on his partner's shoulder before the strength suddenly left him. He would have fallen into a heap on the floor if Javier hadn't been able to catch him and get him into a nearby chair.

"You okay?" Javier asked after a few minutes of Kevin's deep breathing.

"I need a few minutes."

"I'll go get the car. You gonna be able to make it downstairs by yourself?"

"Yeah," he nodded.

"See you in a few," Javier grabbed his jacket and headed for the elevator.

Kevin took a few minutes to gather his thoughts. He didn't know when or how he'd be able to tell his daughter the truth about her mother.

Then there was Alexis. He didn't know what was going to happen. They'd been slowly becoming friends again and though she'd made it clear she wasn't promising him more, he couldn't help but hope for it. But now...Oh God. His wife had tried to kill her.

He'd be lucky if she didn't run screaming back to New Orleans if Castle didn't kill him first.

Kevin grabbed his coat and met Javier at the car.

-d-d-

Kevin knocked on the door to Alexis's room and was admitted by Beckett's 'Come in'.

"Hey, Kev," Castle greeted him with a tentative smile.

"Hey," he smiled as best he could.

"Where's Espo?" Beckett asked.

"Cafeteria."

"Good. He can buy us dinner," Beckett tugged her husband out of his chair and the room, shutting the door behind her.

Alexis has been resting, but woke when Kevin kissed her hand.

"Hey, you," she smiled.

"How ya doing?"

"Better than you," she slid over and patted the space beside her.

Kevin sat beside her.

"Kate filled us in," Alexis started.

Kevin nodded as he took a deep breath. "I'm so sorry, Lex."

"Shh," she shook her head as she picked up his hand. "You told me that it would have never been my fault if Jenny had disappeared with Sarah Grace. It's not your fault that she did this."

"I should have seen the signs sooner," he shook his head as tears welled in his eyes.

"Please don't do this to yourself," Alexis begged.

"How could I ever possibly make this up to you," he replied.

Alexis turned his face to hers, "You have nothing to make up for. Kevin, you didn't do anything to me."

"Maybe I can't forgive myself."

"For what? Kevin, you saved my life. I would have bled out on the floor of autopsy if you not for you and Javi."

"I did this, all of this." he spoke softly.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "We didn't go about our relationship the right way the first time. I'm as much to blame for that as you, but Kevin, I've never been sorry for any of it. It gave me, us, a beautiful little boy."

"You're an amazing woman, Lex," he brought her hands to his lips.

"Thank you," Alexis smiled. "You know I think I take it back when I said you didn't do anything to me."

"Excuse me," Kevin looked at her in surprise.

"There was that weekend when Dad and Kate were in the Hamptons, and we had the loft to ourselves. You did many things to me that weekend," Alexis teased.

"Lex," he snorted in amusement.

"You look tired," she noted before she rested her head on his shoulder.

"I'm exhausted," he admitted.

"Do you want to stay?" she asked.

"Do you think it would be okay?" he asked.

"For a little while," she nodded as she coaxed him into lying beside her.

"I missed this," he admitted.

"Me too," she smiled as she traced a finger along his jaw slowly.

=d=d=d=d=d=

Thank you for the replies. I hope everyone's still loving this. :)


	34. Chapter 19

Rick let himself into the loft and smiled. The table was set for two. Something smelled incredible, and it was gloriously quiet.

"Hey, Castle," Kate greeted him with a smile and a glass of merlot.

"Hello, Beautiful," Castle said in his sexy P.I. voice.

"How's Alexis's therapy going?" Kate stepped in behind him when he took a seat and began massaging his shoulders.

"Okay, so far," Castle nodded. "She's trying to push herself, but her therapist won't let her."

"She's barely a week removed from life saving surgery," Kate replied, "She should be taking it slow."

"I know that, and you know that. Try telling that to Alexis."

"She wants to get home to her kids," Kate concluded, "Can't say that I blame her after what they've been through this year."

"Speaking of, where is everyone?"

"Javi and Lanie have them for the night."

"All of six of them?" Castle asked, "Are we sure they can handle all of them at once?"

"Lanie, yes," Kate nodded. "Javi's gonna end up tied to a chair."

"You'd think he'd learn not to sit down when they're swarming."

Kate laughed, "I think he does it on purpose sometimes. You feeling any better?"

"Alexis is getting back to her usual self," Rick replied.

"Not what I asked, Castle," Kate leaned down so she could see his face. "I asked about you."

"My emotions go with Alexis right now," he replied.

"Anything we need to talk about?"

"Sounds like you know something," Rick twisted in his chair to eye her, "Is there something you want to talk about?"

Kate sighed as she sat down next to him, "Kevin told me right after Alexis was stabbed."

"Then you know about the affair," he replied, "Did it occur to you to tell me?"

"When? When we were waiting to see if Alexis was going to make it through surgery, or when we were waiting to see if she was going to wake up?"

"Anytime between then and now," Castle scowled at her, "She's my daughter. I should have been the first to know."

"Castle, if she hadn't-" Kate couldn't finish the thought. "How would you have reacted to the news?"

"Is it any different than what I feel now?"

"Answer me this: what would you have done about Hunter? Would you let Kevin see him?"

"I…ah," Castle fumbled for a response.

"He screwed up," Kate said. "I am in no way making any kind of excuses for him, but he loves her."

"So that makes it all better?" he challenged her.

"Maybe not, but you have to know that she loves him too."

"Still doesn't help," Rick replied, "How am I going to reconcile this? He's one of my best friends. She's my daughter…my first born."

"What happened with them doesn't change who they are to you," Kate tried to tell him.

"Like hell it doesn't," he replied, "I trusted him. I trusted her, and for how long did they sneak around behind everyone's back?"

"If they'd come out and told you, what would you have done then?"

"Before or after I sent Alexis to a convent?"

"Think of what came out of it," Kate suggested, "Think about Hunter."

"He looks like Kevin," Castle commented.

"I can't believe we never noticed," Kate replied.

"Maybe if they'd ever been side by side," Castle mused.

"Hunter doesn't know and it's not our place to tell him," Kate told him, "You may be mad, but do not take this out on that sweet boy."

"I would never do that. You know me better than that. The day Alexis called to tell me he'd been born. My first grandchild," Castle smiled.

"You cried," Kate remembered. "It was so sweet."

"How could I not?" he replied, "My baby had a baby of her own."

"I was three months pregnant with Ian," Kate smiled. "That was the day I told you."

"I gained a son and a grandson all in one day."

"She's still the little girl you raised," Kate reminded him. "He's still one of your closest friends."

"That's up for debate."

"Think how bad he had to feel after Alexis left," Kate said. "It's not like he could talk to anyone. He didn't even tell Javi."

"If you're asking me to feel sympathy for him right now, you're about three months to early."

"Castle," Kate tipped her head back with a groan. "Think how you'd feel in his position. What if Meredith had taken off with Alexis and not told you for eight years?"

"Don't even try that with me, Kate," Rick responded, "I'm not in his position. I get to be mad about this."

"Okay, but remember how much you love them both," Kate said.

"I do," Rick admitted.

"With that in mind, can you see yourself being okay with this?"

"I have a scenario where I'm okay with this," Rick admitted. "Unfortunately it involves killing Kevin."

"That's not funny."

"Kate, I love you, but I don't think we can talk about this," Rick said. "I know you made dinner, but I think I need to talk to someone else."

"If you're going to confront, Ryan," she followed him when he walked to the door.

"I'm not," he promised. "I don't know how long I'll be. Don't wait up."

"Rick, don't do something you'll regret," Kate cautioned.

"I won't."

-d-d-d-d-

"Hello, Mother," Rick approached Martha's tombstone in the cemetery, "I brought you a drink. Figured we could both use one right about now."

He set the Bloody Mary down on top of the stone and then lightly ran his fingers along the edge of it.

"I think I'm mad at you," he popped open his own bottle of beer and sat down in the grass at his feet. "This would be the part where you'd ask, 'Why, Richard? What have I done now?'"

He took a long pull from the bottle before answering. "Kevin and Alexis had an affair eight years ago, and I have a hunch that you knew about it and said nothing."

He looked around him before focusing on the stone again, "And you're not here to confirm or deny and that makes me madder. You've missed so much. Even though we say having Maggie is like having you around again, it's not the same."

Rick could feel his mother's presence. It was almost as if she was there with him. He could almost smell her perfume.

"I'm not just mad at you," Rick admitted. "I'm mad at Kevin, too, but it's all mixed up with sympathy, even though I won't admit it to Kate."

" _What did you want me to do, Richard?"_ he could hear his mother's voice in his head, _"Did you want me to betray my granddaughter's trust and tell you that they were having an affair?"_

"No, but you could have told her to trust me," Rick answered the voice in his head.

" _We both know that wasn't in the cards,"_ the voice responded, _"She was in an impossible situation. She did what she thought was right when she left, what was best for her, for Kevin and her son. It's not for us to decide eight years later if it was the right choice."_

"I have a feeling if you'd been here, she wouldn't have left. She would've gone to you after Jenny made her threat, and you would have slapped Jenny silly," Rick smiled.

" _Damn straight I would. The nerve of that woman."_

"Then you would've take Alexis by the hand and made her tell me."

" _And how would you have reacted?"_ he heard Martha's voice challenge him.

"Like I told Kate, I have a scenario for being alright with all of this. It just involves killing Kevin."

" _How about a more realistic answer this time, Richard,"_ Martha's voice scolded him, _"He loves her, and she loves him. They made mistakes, but they deserve to be happy."_

"What would you do if you were here," Rick thought out loud.

" _I'd support her decisions no matter what,"_ Martha replied, _"So will you."_

"I will. I still want to deck Kevin, but I will."

That was the end of the conversation in his head. He continued to stare at the tombstone, wishing like hell his mother was still alive.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Kevin answered his apartment door with "What?"

"You and me need to have a talk," Rick scowled at the younger detective.

"Now? Rick, it's almost midnight." Kevin glanced towards the nearest clock on the mantle in his mother's Brooklyn apartment.

"Yeah, right now," Rick replied.

"I'll say it if you want me to," Kevin motioned him through the doorway.

"I'd do it in a hurry before I put my fist through your face," Rick nodded.

"I'm sorry," Kevin dutifully responded, "I am sorry that we kept our relationship a secret from you, but I'm not sorry for what happened. I loved her…still love her."

"Don't tell me that," Rick paced his friend's apartment. "Don't tell me you're in love with my daughter, someone you've known since she was fifteen and slept with while you were married."

"Would you rather it was just sex?"

"That's my little girl you're talking about," Rick advanced towards him in a threatening manner.

"I've got a little girl too," Kevin reminded him. "And one day, I'm going to have to realize that she's not a child any longer."

Rick's fists began to clench and unclench.

"It wasn't just sex," Kevin replied, "Your friendship means more to me than that. If it was just about sex, I would have found it somewhere else. Alexis and I had…have a connection. I can talk to her about things I can't talk to anyone else about, not you or Beckett or even Javi."

"Why Alexis? Why my daughter?" Rick started to pace again. "She was a child."

"She was not a child. She was twenty-two," Kevin reminded him.

"She was my child," Rick hollered.

"Keep your voice down," Kevin snarled at him, "My mother and daughter are trying to sleep."

"You slept with my daughter repeatedly," Rick said. "How the hell would you feel if someone you trusted slept with Sarah Grace while married to someone else?"

"I'd feel just how you do," Kevin assured him, "If you want to take a swing at me, go ahead, but somehow we have to find a way past this. Like it or not, Hunter is my son. I am going to do whatever I can to get Alexis back, so you and I need to find a way to coexist for their sake."

Rick took a deep breath and sat in the nearby recliner. After a moment he looked up at Kevin, "Why'd you let her go?"

"She didn't give me any other choice," Kevin replied, "She was gone before I could do anything about it."

"You knew where she was?" Rick questioned.

"I only knew she was going to Tulane," he shook his head, "I tried to call her, but she'd disconnected her phone. I kept waiting for her to return, and then eight months later I found out she was married. I nearly died."

"You didn't know about Hunter?"

"If I had, I would've gotten on the next plane and glued myself to her side until she came home. I would've told Chris to take a hike."

"I'm going to need time to process this," Rick stated.

"I get that," Kevin nodded.

"I can't promise that I won't take a swing at you," Rick responded.

"You have my understanding if it gets to that."

"I don't know how I missed that Hunter was yours. He looks just like you," Rick admitted.

"Except for the hair," Kevin smiled. "That hair is all Alexis."

"That must have been it," Rick snorted.

"Rick, there's going to come a time when I'm gonna ask you a question."

"It better not be any time soon," Rick stared him down, "Or that fist is going through your face right now."

"We all need some time," Kevin agreed.

"I'd better go," Rick glanced at the clock on the mantel.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "I'm sure I'll see you tomorrow."

Rick nodded and left.

Kevin breathed a sigh of relief.

He checked his watch and then dialed the phone.

" _Beckett."_

"He's on his way home."

" _Are you alright, Ryan?"_ Kate asked.

"No bruises and no holes," he assured his friend.

" _Thanks for the heads up,"_ Kate replied.

"No problem," Kevin smiled. "See you soon."

-d-d-d-d-d-

Thanks for all the replies. I hope everyone's still enjoying this.


	35. Chapter 20

8 days and counting… We want some replies.

-d-d-d-d-d-

The hospital hallway was quiet when Kevin walked towards Alexis's room early in the morning.

"Detective Ryan," the officer at the door greeted him with a courteous nod.

"It's Muldoon, right?"

"Yes, Sir," the young officer nodded.

"Anyone here yet?" Kevin asked.

"No, the doctors don't start rounds for another hour, and Mr. Castle has to take one of his younger children to the dentist this morning."

"Thanks, Muldoon," Kevin replied, "Why don't you get a cup of coffee? On me."

"Promised Detective Beckett I wouldn't leave the door."

"I won't tell if you don't," Kevin winked and handed him a few dollars.

Muldoon nodded and walked down the hall as Kevin entered Alexis's room. The woman in question was curled up on her side, still asleep.

Kevin bent down and kissed her cheek before claiming the chair next to her.

After a moment her eyes fluttered open and she smiled, "I know you."

"Hey," Kevin grasped her hand and brought it to his lips, "I didn't mean to wake you."

"It was either you or the doctor. You're a more welcome sight."

"You think so, huh?" he smiled.

"Yeah, those doctors like to prod me with needles," she replied.

"I'd like to prod you with something a little more interesting," he teased.

"A lot more interesting," she smiled.

"How you feeling?" he asked.

"Better," Alexis nodded. "You?"

"I'm hanging in there," he assured her, "I hear you started physical therapy yesterday."

"Things hurt," Alexis admitted.

"Can I help?"

"Maybe," she laid her hand against his cheek. "You can smile for me again."

"How can I refuse such a request?" he grinned.

"I've missed seeing that smile."

"I'm glad to make you happy," Kevin told her.

"What time is it?" she glanced around trying to decipher the time of day.

"A little before seven," Kevin told her. "I just wanted to see you before the day got going."

"Everything okay?" she thought she saw something in his eyes, "You look tired."

"It's been a long few days," Kevin smiled.

"Wanna talk?" she asked.

"Maybe tonight, if you want to have dinner," Kevin posed.

"I'm kinda on lockdown," Alexis glanced around at her surroundings.

"I'll come to you with dinner. Burgers, fries, and shakes from Remy's?"

"Sounds good," Alexis smiled. "Call me if you can't make it."

"It's going to take something epic for me to cancel," he told her.

"I'll pray for a slow day," she promised. "Get going. Gates won't be happy if you're late."

"Take it easy today," he kissed her forehead.

"I will," she smiled. "Be careful out there."

"I'll try," he smiled.

"No ending up in a bed next to mine," she said sternly.

"Deal," he replied.

-d-d-d-d-

"Hi, Dad," Alexis greeted her father when he entered her hospital room.

"Hi, Sweetie," Rick leaned down and kissed her cheek. "You're alone?"

"Yeah. Kevin was here, but he left a few hours ago."

Rick muttered something under his breath that Alexis couldn't understand.

"Dad, something you want to say?"

"No, it's nothing," Rick covered himself.

"Take a seat," she motioned to the chairs.

Rick parked himself in the chair he'd spent most of the week occupying.

"He's your friend, and he's the father of your oldest grandson," Alexis started. "What happened between us was as much my decision as it was his."

"That decision nearly got you killed," Rick growled.

"There it is," Alexis gave an exaggerated sigh. "Dad, what happened wasn't Kevin's fault."

"You're lying in a hospital bed with stitches holding your guts in," Rick reminded her, "Your former flame's wife hired the man that tried to kill you. How is it not Kevin's fault?"

"He didn't hire someone to kill me," Alexis said. "Dad, he loves me."

"He may not have hired the man or stabbed you with the knife, but you cannot ignore the part he played in all of this."

"What about the part where he and Javi kept me from bleeding out all over the floor in autopsy? Or the part where Kevin held my hand the entire way here in the ambulance?"

"Alexis…" he began.

"Don't Alexis me," she interrupted him, "He did not do this, Dad. None of this is his fault."

"You were-"

"Do not tell me I was a child when I was with Kevin," Alexis shook her head.

"You were only twenty-two."

"What were you doing at twenty-two, Dad?"

"That's beside the point," Rick sputtered.

"What did you think of Kevin before all of this, Dad?"

"He was one of my closest friends," Rick responded softly.

"And?"

"A good man who looked absolutely miserable when he thought no one was looking."

"And now?"

"Well, he looks a lot happier, sort of. At least until this business with his estranged wife."

"Don't you want your friend to be happy?"

"Yes."

"And me?"

"Not fair," he grumbled.

"It's totally fair. The fairest. I'm being Snow White right now," Alexis smiled.

"Be serious," he scowled at her.

"I am," Alexis said. "Dad, the first time I really felt happy after Chris died was because of Kevin. We made our mistakes, but I can't be sorry for any of it. He's still your friend and a good man. What we did doesn't negate that."

"You're my daughter," he replied, "He was an older man that should have known better."

"Dad, don't let this dismantle your friendship."

"I'm going to need time," Rick responded.

"Well, Kevin's patient," Alexis smiled. "Anyone else would've demanded I tell Hunter who his real father is by now."

"When will you tell Hunter?"

"That's still up in the air," Alexis replied.

"I've been looking at pictures of Hunter. He looks a lot like you and Mother for the most part except for those eyes," Rick shook his head. "I don't know how I didn't see it before."

"You weren't looking."

"I guess not," Rick admitted.

"Did you and Kate get any sleep last night?"

"A bit," he nodded.

"And my kids?"

"They're fine. Maggie is becoming very attached to Jim," Rick smiled. "You're going to end up with a teacher for a daughter."

"Both the boys want to be cops, so a teacher is fine with me. I think she'll keep with the acting thing."

"I talked to the doctors before I came in," Rick stated, "Sounds like you might get sprung in a couple of days."

"Thank God," Alexis sighed. "I can't wait for my own room and bed."

"Would you mind if that room and bed were in the Hamptons? I thought we could use a break from the city."

"That sounds even better."

"Good. I'll clear it with the doctors and make arrangements for a car to drive us up."

"Perfect."

-d-d-d-

"Hey," Kate sat next to Kevin's desk.

"Hi," Kevin raised an eyebrow at her.

"You look a lot better today," she commented.

"Thank you," Kevin nodded.

"I guess you got a good night's sleep," she smirked.

Kevin nodded, "Yeah, I did."

"Are you and Sarah Grace doing anything this weekend?"

"You mean besides hiding from the press?"

"How'd you like to hide out with us?"

"What do you mean?"

"If Alexis keeps doing well and stays infection free, the doctors are going to release her by the weekend. With how confined we've all been to work and home, Rick suggested that we could use a break, so we're headed for the Hamptons. How would you and Sarah Grace like to join us?"

"I don't know, Beckett," Kevin shook his head. "Castle is a long ways away from being okay with this. I wouldn't want to…"

"This will be the perfect time for you to clear the air," Kate waved off Kevin's attempt to reject her offer. "You and he can have words over drinks on Friday night. Alexis, Rick, and the kids will probably be leaving Friday morning. You, Sarah Grace, and I can drive up on Friday after work. I'll spring for coffee. Don't forget a bathing suit."

"Beckett, wait a second," Kevin said as the detective walked away. "I didn't say yes. Beckett!"

"Give it up," Javier advised. "You were doomed the moment she sat down."

"Wonderful," Kevin rolled his eyes.

"You're humming," Javier observed of his partner a few moments later.

"I'm what?" Kevin looked up from the file he was studying.

"You. You're humming…again."

"No, I'm not," Kevin responded, "You need to get your hearing checked, Partner. You're hearing things."

"You're humming that ridiculous song I caught you listening to a few years ago in the observation room."

"I am not," Kevin protested.

"Bro, what's going on?" Javi slid his chair closer to his partner's desk.

"Nothing. I am not humming. You are hearing things. Now, go back to work."

"Are you going to make me pound it out of you because I will?"

Kevin rolled his eyes, "Do you have to know everything I do?"

"Yes," Javi nodded.

"I sort of have a date tonight."

"How can you sort of have a date?"

"I'm bringing burgers, fries and shakes to the hospital," Kevin replied, "Lex and I are going to talk."

"Alone?" Javier asked.

"Just me and Alexis and an entire hospital staff."

"I'm talking about her dad and stepmother," Javier nodded towards Kate. The brunette seemed to be concentrating on a report.

"Not sure," Kevin frowned.

"Hey, Beckett, are you and Castle spending the evening at the hospital with Alexis?" Javi called over to her.

"Javi," Kevin hissed.

"Why?" Kate looked up.

"Just curious," Javi shrugged.

"If you're just wondering, then I guess Rick and I can go over there and have dinner with Alexis," Kate smiled before she looked down at her paperwork. She started to count.

"It's just that Lanie and I were thinking that maybe you and Castle wanted a night out with adults," Javi added quickly.

"So you and Kev want to go out?"

"Javi, what are you doing?" Kevin looked to his partner in confusion.

"Actually I thought we could give Kevin and Alexis some alone time tonight," Javier smiled.

"Oh, well, it that case," Kate replied, "Sure, I'll call Castle and tell him the plan."

"Thank you, Beckett," Kevin smiled.

"You might want to leave out the part about Kevin and Alexis though," Javi suggested when Kate began dialing.

"Duh," Kate frowned.

Kevin looked at his watch. It seemed like an eternity until his shift was over.

-d-d-d-

Alexis looked and snorted when she saw a white paper bag being held by a hand.

"Is that for me?" she called, setting her book aside.

"Depends on your food tolerance level," Kevin pushed his way into the room with a tray of shakes in his hand, "If I remember correctly, you were a strawberry girl."

"Good memory, Detective," Alexis smiled. "Now as I recall, you liked raspberry."

"What?"

"Well, raspberry lip gloss," she took hold of his tie and pulled him into a light kiss.

"I guess you're getting your strength back," he set the food out.

"Physical therapy is still a bitch," Alexis admitted.

"But it's a bitch I'm sure you'll beat in no time," he smiled.

"I get sprung on Friday," she proclaimed with a wide smile, "Just in time for the weekend in the Hamptons. I don't know if Kate filled you in on my post hospital plans yet."

"She did. Sarah Grace and I have been invited to join you, if that's alright."

"That's more than alright," Alexis smiled, "And don't worry about my dad. He'll just have to get over it."

"Lot of good memories in that house," Kevin smiled.

"Unfortunately, my doctor is going to put me on restrictions that won't allow us to recreate any of them," she frowned.

"You know what my favorite one is?" Kevin asked.

"Does it involve the hot tub?"

"No," Kevin smiled. "It's you and me on the beach with Sarah Grace."

"That was such a great moment," Alexis smiled, "She was so small. I can't believe how much she's grown."

"That was the first time I was sure I felt that charge," Kevin remembered.

"Me too," she replied.

"You covered pretty well until you ignored me in the food line."

"It was either that or kiss the crap out of you in front of everyone," she bit her lip.

"That would've been bad," Kevin nodded.

"I didn't figure it would go over too well in a room full of cops."

"Along with my wife and your dad," Kevin chuckled.

"Yes, that would have been the worst part," Alexis replied.

Kevin nodded as he bit into his burger and smiled when Alexis sighed in contentment as she ate hers.

"Hospital food that bad?"

"No, but I missed Remy's."

"Have you been since you've been back in New York City?"

"No, I haven't," Alexis shook her head.

"As good as you remember?" he asked.

"Better," she wiped at her mouth and then took a healthy gulp of her shake.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, "I want the truth."

"You can't handle the truth," she teased.

"Funny," Kevin smiled.

"I thought so…Sore," she admitted, "Like my insides are being held in my body by stitches."

"You're hilarious," Kevin frowned this time.

"I bet I'll feel better if I can get a smile," Alexis reached for his hand.

Kevin gave it his best shot but couldn't make it genuine.

"Are you that mad about this?"

"I'm concerned," he amended.

"I'm okay," Alexis reminded him.

Kevin brought her hand to his lips.

"Much more effective, right here," Alexis tapped at her lips.

"Don't want to get your heart racing," Kevin smirked.

"I'd be willing to risk cardiac arrest for you," she tapped at her lips a second time.

Kevin smiled and then kissed her gently.

"I've missed you," she admitted, "I've missed us."

"Me too," he nodded.

"What are we gonna do, Kevin?" Alexis cradled his face.

"We'll figure that out when you are on the mend," he replied. "Eat your burger and fries before it gets cold."

"Bossy," Alexis smiled. "I like it."


	36. Chapter 21

Yay. Castle's back tonight.

-d-d-d-d-

"I'll tell you one thing," Steve said. "You guys have got some really good looking ME's."

"Hey," Danny said. "What about my wife?"

"I think of her as a sister."

"One of those ME's is my girl," Kevin chimed in, "And the other usually gets claimed by my dimwitted partner."

"Story of my life," Steve said.

"I am so telling Catherine," Danny teased.

"Go ahead and try," Steve baited him, "See how far you get before I punch you."

"Catherine would be your wife," Javier questioned.

"Yeah," Steve dug his phone out and showed him a picture.

"Damn," Javier gave a whistle of appreciation.

"I'd take that back if I were you," Danny advised the detective, "Steve's a former Seal."

"My partner is former Special Forces," Kevin replied.

"There's a MMA fight I'd like to see," Danny snorted, "Navy versus Army."

"So, you know my pain," Kevin surmised.

"Absolutely," Danny said. "He won't let me drive my own car."

"Damn, and I thought I had it bad," Kevin replied.

"He blew up a pawn shop," Danny said.

"He told me I needed help and that he would pay for it," Steve told Javier.

"These civies just don't understand our sacrifices," Javi rolled his eyes while extending his fist to Steve.

"Absolutely, Man," Steve returned the bump.

"So, what's your wife look like?" Kevin asked Danny.

Danny took his cell phone out and showed Kevin a picture.

"She's beautiful," Kevin replied, "You know in that totally innocent way in which I'd never show any sort of interest."

"I think Alexis was plenty innocent before you got hold of her," Javier smirked.

"Red heads are never innocent," Steve commented.

"This one was," Javi responded.

"Shut up, Javi," Kevin shot him a look.

Javi snorted in amusement.

"So what's the story with you and Alexis?" Steve asked.

"You two like her, right?"

"Platonically," Steve nodded.

"Alexis and I were involved several years back when I was still married, and she was still an undergrad at Columbia."

"Oh," Danny's eyes went wide.

"You were married and you were sleeping with her? Why are you still standing?" Steve asked.

"Rick didn't find out until recently," Javi said.

"That explains that," Danny replied, "So how did things end? They had to because we met her through Chris."

"My soon to be ex-wife told her if she didn't get the hell away from me, that she'd take my daughter and disappear," Kevin said quietly, staring straight ahead.

"Wow, that's pretty harsh," Danny added, "I'm glad that me and my ex managed to be civil for our daughter's sake."

"I didn't know it at the time, but Alexis was pregnant with my son when she left," Kevin added.

"Hunter, her oldest, he's yours," Steve asked.

"Yeah," Kevin swirled his drink in the glass before taking a long drink.

Danny shot Steve a look, _Subject change?_

Steve nodded, "So, this is a pretty cool place. Reminds me of this bar in Japan a bunch of us ended up in one night."

"Yeah, I bet they had a karaoke machine just like the one Rick has here," Javi replied, "What do you say, Navy? Want to sing for your dinner?"

"I don't sing," Steve shook his head. "Danny does."

"Let's see what you got," Javi challenged his rival.

"Alright," Danny nodded as they got up. "Rick have any Sinatra on that thing?"

Steve laughed as the guys wandered away and looked at Kevin, "Sorry. Didn't mean to bring up a sore subject."

"It's alright," Kevin shrugged, "It's not like it's a secret."

"I don't know if it makes it better or worse, but your girl and your son were loved."

"I keep hearing what a great guy Chris was," Kevin frowned, "I don't even know how to compete with that."

"There's no competition," Steve shook his head. "The way you look at Alexis and the way she looks at you? There's no competition."

"Thanks for saying that," Kevin nodded, "I still feel like I'm competing with a ghost. I keep hearing what a great guy Chris was."

"He was," Steve nodded. "But from what I've seen and heard, so are you."

"There's an entire slew of people ready to line up and tell you that you're wrong," Kevin replied, "Starting with my soon to be ex-in-laws."

"Mad at you, are they?" Steve ventured.

"Well, let's think about this," Kevin responded sarcastically. "I had an affair. Knocked up my mistress. As soon as she returned to town, I went running straight towards her again like a dog chasing a bone. I asked their daughter for a divorce, which basically drove their daughter to hire someone to kill my lover. Now she's facing a twenty-five year prison sentence…So yeah, they're mad at me."

"You want another drink?" Steve asked after a moment. "I think you might need it."

"I'm probably going to need the bottle," Kevin responded.

"Well, if it doesn't knock you out, we'll hit you with the bottle," Steve promised as he motioned to the bartender. "So, how'd you and Alexis meet?"

"Through her father when she was fifteen," Kevin took a healthy gulp from the tumbler that the bartender had just filled.

"Okay, I have a younger sister and a daughter of my own so if you were sleeping with her back then, do not tell me or I'll have to beat the hell out of you on principle," Steve said after a moment.

"I'm so tired of people asking that question," Kevin groaned, "Nothing happened between the two of us until she was twenty-two."

"Good to know," Steve nodded. "Sorry to bring up a sore point. So, what, you and she just looked at each other one day and fell into bed?"

"It was a series of innocent run-ins that started it all," Kevin responded, "Run in at a coffee shop, attending a special event in which her father was honored and then a Fourth of July barbecue. The more I saw her, the more I kept wanting to see her and talk to her. It came to a head, and we agreed that it was best to not see each other because we could see where it was leading…Then it went there."

"And it kept going there," Steve nodded.

"I fell hard," Kevin admitted. "And then I stupidly let her walk out of my life."

"Didn't you say that she didn't give you much of a choice?" Steve took a long drink from his beer.

"She didn't," Kevin agreed. "But there were a lot of things I could've done to either stop her or get her back and I didn't do any of them."

"Knowing what you do now, what would you have done differently?" Steve asked.

"Divorced my wife eight years ago," Kevin responded without hesitation.

"She really did this?"

"Hired your pal to stab Alexis," Kevin nodded.

"He is not my pal," Steve shook his head.

"He's more your pal than mine," Kevin responded, "He did try to stab the mother of my son."

"He's a good kid," Steve smiled. "I met him at the hospital the other day when Javi took us to the cafeteria."

"Yeah, he gets that from his mother."

"Looks are from you though," Steve smirked. "I got lucky. My kids look like their mother."

"And hopefully someday I get a chance to tell him who I am."

"He doesn't know yet?"

"No. With everything that's gone on lately, we haven't gotten the chance."

"You will," Steve tapped his back.

 _And I did it my way…_

Steve and Kevin exchanged a glance and turned around to see Danny on the stage.

"Oh, no," Steve groaned, "Here we go."

"Just pray Javi doesn't start rapping," Kevin frowned.

"Yes, let's hope," Steve nodded, "Because Danno will try to join in and that man can't rap."

"Danno?"

"It's a nickname. His daughter started it."

"We'll have to remember it," Kevin responded before letting out an appreciative whistle.

 _It's such a good vibration…_

"Oh, god, please no," Kevin's hand immediately covered his face, "He went to Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch."

Steve laughed as Danny sat down next them again, "Hey guys."

"Nice job," Steve said. "Wish I'd filmed it."

"You still got a chance with that crazy man," Danny motioned towards Javi know was mid-rap.

"There isn't enough alcohol in the world to erase these images from my mind," Kevin groaned.

Steve laughed, "You remember last year when we took Chin out for his birthday?"

"Don't remind me," Danny felt himself beginning to blush.

"I want to hear this," Kevin said.

"No, you don't," Danny shook his head.

"What did he sing?" Kevin asked Steve.

"Single Ladies," Steve got out.

"I'm betting there was a lot of alcohol involved in that one," Kevin burst out laughing.

"I hate you," Danny shook his head.

"Love you too, Partner," Steve took another swig from his beer.

Kevin smiled, "You guys sound like me and Javi."

8-8-8—8-8-8

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Kate asked when she saw Danny and Steve come out of the elevator.

Steve held up some papers, "Signed, sealed, and delivered. Sang Min belongs to the State of Hawaii again and as part of the deal, he is never allowed back in New York."

"Thank god," Kate replied, "So you boys are headed out?"

"Transport leaves in a few hours," Steve nodded, "We have a few ends to tie up first before we take custody of Sang Min."

"Like a hug," Kate smiled.

"Absolutely," Steve hugged the brunette. "Next time you're in the neighborhood, stop by."

"We absolutely will," Kate replied.

"You owe me a poker game," Javier put his hand out to Danny.

"Next time," Danny grinned.

"Any time you're in the area, beer is on me," Javi offered.

"Same to you," Steve shook Javier's hand. "By the way, tell Lanie, her chocolates are on the way."

"I'll be sure to eat most of them," Javi laughed.

"It was great working with you both," Kevin shook each man's hand.

"Take care of Alexis," Steve smiled.

"And come visit when you get the chance," Danny reminded.

"I'd love to," Kevin replied, "I've never been to Hawaii."

"Steve will teach you to surf," Danny added.

"I'll leave that task for Kono," Steve chuckled, "She's much more qualified."

"I've seen pictures," Javier nodded with a grin.

"She better have been in a wet suit," Steve laughed, "We're gonna head to the hospital to say goodbye to Alexis before we take custody of Sang Min."

"I'll drive you to the hospital," Kevin fished in his desk for the car keys.

"Thanks," Danny nodded.

-d-d-d-

"Alright the nurse said she's in PT," Kevin said. "It's this way."

"We can wait until she gets back," Steve assured him, "The plane won't leave without us."

"She just went up," Kevin explained.

"We've got time," Steve replied.

"Steve, I think what Kevin's trying to say is that he doesn't," Danny said.

"Gates has been good about this but I can't stay around long."

"Know the way?" Steve asked.

"Follow me," Kevin nodded.

Danny and Steve followed Kevin to the elevator.

They got to the PT room and Kevin knocked lightly on the glass, making Alexis look up. She waved and smiled before beckoning them in.

"Hey, guys," Alexis greeted them with a grateful smile. She'd use any excuse to take a break from her physical therapy.

"Hey," Kevin kissed her cheek. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, the Marquis de Sad is just warming up."

"We just wanted to stop by and said goodbye," Danny said.

"Paperwork come through already?" Alexis frowned.

"Yeah," Steve nodded. "But, as part of the deal he is never allowed back in New York again."

"It's not like he's going to be allowed to roam freely anyways for quite awhile," Alexis replied, "Right?"

"For a few decades anyways," Danny confirmed.

"I doubt he'll ever breathe free air again."

"Let's hope not," Alexis replied, "Thank you both for all you did in getting the guy off the streets."

"No problem," Steve said.

"Mahalo, Brah," Alexis teased as Steve gave her a hug.

"Take care of yourself, Little Sister."

"You need anything, you let us know," Danny stepped in for his hug, "And get yourself down to Hawaii as soon as you can. We've got some shrimp with your name on it."

"I will and next time you're up this way, I owe you a sausage, pepper, and onion sandwich from the Jersey Boardwalk."

"Deal," he replied.

"I'll check in on your dad for you, if you want," Alexis said.

"I'd appreciate that," Danny stated.

"Have a good flight and make sure Kono calls me when she has the baby," Alexis reminded them.

"Absolutely," Steve replied.

"Give my best to Chin, Catherine, and Mindy," she waved.

"Take care of those kids of yours," Danny replied.

"Always," Alexis smiled. "Hey, tell Grace if she needs a letter of rec, I'll be glad to do it."

"We'd better head out," Steve glanced at the impatient looking physical therapist.

"Take me with you," Alexis begged.

"I'll stop by later," Kevin promised.

"You'd better."

"Take care, Lex," Steve stated.

"You too," Alexis said before she sighed and went back into the PT room leaving the boys to walk away.

"You'd better take care of her, Ryan," Steve warned Kevin while they made their way back to the car, "Or you are going to answer to me."

"I'll remember that," Kevin nodded. "But no worries, I plan to spend the rest of my life taking care of Alexis."

"That's good to hear," Steve replied, "She deserves happiness."

"She's got a good heart," Danny said quietly.

Kevin looked at the other detective, "I'll look in on your dad too."

"Thanks," Danny nodded.

"Sure," Kevin nodded. "I know what it is to worry about a widowed parent."

"You do?" Danny's ears perked up a bit.

"Yeah, my dad died many years ago," Kevin stated.

"I'm sorry," Danny nodded.

"So was I," Kevin said.

"Does it get easier?" Danny asked.

"Yeah," Kevin replied, "It takes time."

The elevator stopped and the boys exited.

"I can give you a lift to the airport," Kevin offered.

"No need," Steve pointed. "The Governor sent us a car."

"Wow, this must be a heck of an important prisoner," Kevin replied, "They're almost rolling out the red carpet here."

"You ever make it to Hawaii, we'll explain the whole story over beer and shrimp," Steve grinned and shook Kevin's hand one more time.

"Looking forward to it."

"Take care of yourself, Ryan," Danny shook the other man's hand.

"You too," Kevin shook each man's hand one last time.

=d=d=d=d=d=

You know the drill.


	37. Chapter 22

Enjoy!

-d-d-d-d-

"I'm being wheeled out now," Alexis spoke into her phone. "I'll see you tonight when you drive up with Kate, right?"

 _"Take it easy today,"_ Kevin advised her, _"We'll be there as soon as we can."_

"I know," Alexis smiled. "Make sure Kate drives safely."

 _"I will,"_ Kevin smiled fondly on his end. _"Text me when you get there."_

"We will," Alexis assured him, catching sight of her children waiting eagerly for her just outside the hospital doors.

"Hang up already," Rick advised.

"Bye, Kevin. Love you," she said softly.

 _"Love you too,"_ he replied.

"Mommy!" Maggie exclaimed while running towards her mother.

Rick maneuvered around his daughter and caught Maggie, "Didn't we talk about the right way to greet your mommy when you saw her?"

"Be gentle," Maggie recited, not really knowing what that meant.

"Right, and I guess we should've gone over what the means," Rick smiled. "It means no jumping on Mommy for a while."

"Can I give Mommy a hug?" she asked.

"Yes, but you have to be careful, okay?"

"Dad, stop being such a dad," Alexis giggled.

"I missed you, Mommy," Maggie reached up to hug her mother around the shoulders.

"I missed you, too, Baby. I got your picture. Thank you," Alexis returned the hug and added a kiss to her forehead.

"Are you all better now?" Maggie asked.

"I'm getting there," Alexis nodded. "I hear you were a very good girl while I was sick."

"Yep, I was a very good girl," Maggie beamed, "Wasn't I, Grandpa?"

"You were indeed, Miss Maggie," Rick smiled.

"Boys? Do I get a hug?"

Hunter and Cade immediately went to give her a hug.

"I missed you guys," Alexis hugged them tightly.

"We missed you too," Hunter replied, "How do you feel?"

"Better now that I've had my hugs," Alexis replied, "Is everyone ready for a weekend of sand and sun?"

"We get to go to the beach," Maggie cheered.

"Yes, we do," Alexis replied.

"Let's get going then," Rick ushered his family to the car where Alexis's siblings were waiting.

"Hey, guys," Alexis greeting her siblings while gingerly climbing into the SUV her father had rented for the weekend.

"Are you better, Lex?" Jo asked her big sister.

"I am now," she smiled at her.

"Good," Jo smiled. "Will you help us build a sand castle?"

"Absolutely," Alexis nodded. "But I can't go in the water because of my stitches."

"Okay," Jo replied

"Mommy, Grandpa says Sarah Grace is coming up," Maggie said.

"She is," Alexis nodded.

"Can she help us build a sand castle too?" Jo asked.

"I bet she can," Alexis nodded. "I remember her loving the beach."

"Is it a long drive?" Maggie asked.

"Remember when we'd drive to see Grandma in Alabama?" Alexis asked.

"It takes that long?" Maggie moaned.

"No, but it takes a while," Alexis shook her head.

"Are there going to be any stops along the way?" Maggie asked.

"Maybe we can talk Grandpa into stopping for breakfast," Alexis smiled.

"Is everyone hungry?" Rick stated up the vehicle.

"Yes," everyone chorused.

"We'll stop along the way," Rick replied, "I know just the place."

=d=d=d=d=

Alexis was sitting outside, looking up at the moon.

"How's my girl?" she heard in her ear.

"Hey, how long have you guys been here?" Alexis jumped a little in surprise.

"About fifteen minutes," he sat down beside her.

"It took you this long to find me because?" she leaned in against him.

"Had to put our things away and deal with Rick's evil eye until Kate distracted him."

"The fresh air feels so good," Alexis inhaled deeply when Kevin's arm came around her shoulder, "I was cooped up in that sterile hospital for too long."

"Yeah, I imagine it does," Kevin smiled as his arm tightened around her a little, "This feels better."

"How was the drive?" she asked.

"Seemed to take forever," Kevin nuzzled into her neck, "I was a bit anxious."

"How are you doing?" she tilted her head away to give him better access.

"Better now that you're out of that sterile place," Kevin replied.

"I saw the newspapers. Jenny took a deal?"

"Amazingly enough she didn't want to put her daughter through the agony of a trial," Kevin nodded.

"She may hate us, but she does love her daughter," Alexis said. "It's a good thing."

"Now we just need to work on the divorce," he sighed heavily.

Alexis shifted so she was between his legs and leaned back against him, her head finding a home on his shoulder.

"Are you warm enough?" he thought he felt her shiver slightly.

"Yeah," she nodded. "Do you remember the weekend we came out here by ourselves?"

"I can account for every minute we had together," he smiled into her neck.

"That was when I first realized you knew how to play the piano," she recalled. "It was also the first time we used the piano for another reason besides making music."

"I hope that's a secret you've kept to yourself," he chuckled.

"I have. I just hope Kate and my dad have never used it for that reason… The first time we were ever together, I wouldn't let it happen on the couch because I'd walked in on them far too often."

"Too much information," he groaned.

"Oh come on," Alexis giggled. "You had to have caught them on their way to being intimate a few times."

"None which I want to remember," Kevin replied.

Alexis turned her head to look at him, "I want you."

"I want you, too," he groaned, "Sadly, I'm pretty certain that doctor of yours put you on restrictions that don't allow for such activities."

"Unfortunately," Alexis nodded. "I'm also blaming my absolute lack of filter on the medication. I think it's kicking in. I should get inside and to my bed before I pass out."

"Did you want some help?" he offered, "I can tuck you in."

"How about you help me up and see me to the door like a gentleman? I have a feeling I might fall over if I don't have some help."

"Anything for you," he helped her to her feet and allowed her to lean on him on the way back inside.

"Everything okay?" Rick asked when Alexis and Kevin appeared.

"My medication's kicking in. Kevin's just seeing me to my room."

"I'll help you upstairs," Rick stepped in next to her.

"Dad, remember our discussion?" Alexis asked.

"I'm offering help," Rick countered, "It's what a father does."

"I've got help," Alexis leaned her head on Kevin's shoulder. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Alexis," Rick kissed her forehead before turning to address Kevin, "I'm timing you."

"Yes, Warden," Kevin walked Alexis to her bedroom door.

"Tuck me in?" she batted her lashes.

"Your father's timing me," Kevin reminded her.

"What's he going to do to you?" she slurred her words slightly.

"Make me sleep on the beach," Kevin snorted.

"Kiss goodnight?"

"Always," he leaned in, "Sleep well, Lex."

"Love you," she smiled sleepily after a kiss.

"Love you too."

She slipped into her bedroom and closed the door behind her.

Kevin's forehead pressed against the door for a moment before heading down to the living area was Rick was surely waiting.

"Well, that took you long enough."

"Give it a rest, Castle," Kate scolded him, "They're in love."

"I wasn't up there long enough to disobey the doctor's orders," Kevin said.

Rick muttered under his breath before disappearing outside to cool off at his Kate's urging.

Kate sighed and rubbed her forehead, "I love you, Kevin, but you have got to be just a little more sensitive."

"I can't help how I feel about Alexis," Kevin responded defensively, "We tried to fight it."

"I know, I know. If anyone knows what it's like to fight feelings it's me," Kate reminded him. "But Rick's still getting used to the idea that not only did Alexis lie to him, but so did you."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Kevin nodded.

"So you'll be a little more subtle about things?"

"I'll try."

"Good," Kate smiled and then looked at her watch. "I'm tired."

"Yeah, me too," Kevin glanced at the clock.

"I set some blankets on the sofa for you," Kate added, "Sorry, rooms are all claimed."

"It's fine," Kevin smiled. "Go up to bed."

"Nite, Kevin," Kate smiled.

Kevin waited until Kate went upstairs and then headed out to the beach.

"Hey," Kevin announced himself when he found Rick on the beach a few yards from the house.

"Everyone asleep?" Rick inquired as he sipped from his glass of scotch.

"Yeah. Kate just went up. I think she knows it's pointless to wait you out. She hasn't forgotten how stubborn you can be."

"Needed some peace and quiet," Rick replied.

Kevin took a deep breath, "You haven't said much since we got here."

"Still trying to wrap my head around all of this," Rick admitted.

"Castle, I can't be sorry for a lot of things to do with me and Alexis, but I am sorry that I never told you."

"I don't want an apology," Rick growled, "I want to go back in time and have you keep your hands off my daughter."

"Then Hunter wouldn't exist," Kevin pointed out.

"Don't go justifying this with Hunter," Rick snarled, "You slept with my daughter, repeatedly. I don't care how you justified it in your own mind. You betrayed me."

"I did," Kevin agreed. "And I am sorry for that."

"I don't want your apology."

"Then what do you want from me?"

"I want to know why? Why did you go and sleep with my daughter?" Rick asked. "She was a child."

"She was twenty-two, Rick. She wasn't a child."

"She was a child when you met," Rick replied, "You should have known better. No matter how unhappy you were with Jenny, you should have known better."

"I fell in love with her," Kevin said. "I tried like hell not to, believe me, but I fell in love with her. I couldn't stop."

"Did you think about me or Kate? Did you consider our feelings at all?" Rick asked.

"It was why we fought it for as long as we could," Kevin stated.

"How did it happen?"

"I left the precinct one night and instead of going home, I went to the loft. It'd been a bad day. Our only witness in a murder had been shot by the suspect, but we couldn't prove it. Alexis was the only one I wanted to talk to. You and Kate were visiting her aunt for the weekend. That was the first time we slept together."

"So you just showed up at the loft without any preamble, and just slept with my daughter?"

"No," Kevin shook his head. "Trust me, sleeping with Lex was not in my mind when I showed up that night. I just wanted to talk, and she was the first person I thought of."

"How do we get from the first time you met her when she was fifteen to sleeping with her at the age of twenty-two?" he gulped down the amber liquid.

"Castle, dammit, I screwed up, okay? I admit it, but I am in love with her," Kevin said. "I'm sorry if you can't accept that, but it's the truth."

"Reverse positions, Kevin. You're standing here listening to someone you've trusted for close to fifteen years telling you that they had an affair with Sarah Grace while he was married to someone else."

"I'd want to tear his guts out," Kevin clenched his fist, "Quite frankly I expect you to do just that."

"I promised Alexis and Kate I wouldn't," Rick said quietly.

"I won't tell if you don't," Kevin replied.

"What do we tell them when you show up at the breakfast table with a hole the size of my fist?"

"So maybe you don't tear out my guts. Take a shot," Kevin said motioned towards his chin. "Deck me."

"It's not going to change things," Rick shook his head.

"I just want to know that we can still be family after this," Kevin said. "You're my son's grandfather. I want to marry your daughter one day."

"You want me to process this, you have to stop saying things like you want to marry my daughter," Rick replied.

"I wanted to marry her eight years ago. I was a coward. I should've gone after her the minute I knew where she was."

"We've all made a thousand mistakes that we want to take back. I should have sent her to an all girls school upstate, then we wouldn't be in this situation."

"No, we'd still be standing here," Kevin smiled. "I would've met her eventually."

"Inevitability," Rick sighed.

"I'm sorry, Castle," Kevin stated, "I'll say it until I'm blue in the face, but it's not going to change anything. I still love her, and I will continue to love her whether you can find a way to accept it or not."

"I know you love her, Kevin," Rick admitted. "The way you look at her? You never looked at Jenny like that."

Kevin smiled at that and then turned serious, "I know you liked Christopher, and I know he made her happy."

"Yeah, I did and yes, he did, but he would want me to be okay when Alexis found someone else."

"Yeah," Kevin's head bobbed.

"I'm not ready to give my blessing, but I'm not going to wring your neck every time I see you together," Castle stated, "But if you hurt her…"

"That's not in my plans. That was never in my plans," Kevin insisted.

"I need a refill," Rick looked to his empty glass.

"Come on," Kevin motioned. "Kate's waiting for you."

"Go in," Rick looked towards the stars, "I need a few more minutes."

"Alright. Just don't sit on the couch. Remember I'm sleeping there."

"I'll keep that in mind," Rick smirked, "Night, Kevin."

"Night," Kevin walked back to the house. He got to the deck just before his cell phone rang. He picked it up and saw a beautiful redhead that he was quite fond of on the screen, "I thought you went to sleep."

 _"I wanted to make sure he didn't pummel you,"_ she smirked.

"Bruise free," Kevin smiled. "Though I did give him a chance."

 _"Playing with fire, aren't we, Detective Ryan?"_

"That's what I do whenever I get near you," he smiled. "How are you feeling?"

 _"Still sore and a little foggy from the medication,"_ she admitted.

"Does this feel weird to you?" he asked.

" _Sleeping in the same house but not the same room,"_ she posed. _"A bit. I think it's for the best right now. I don't think any of our kids are ready to see us with someone who isn't their mom or dad."_

"Yeah, you're right," Kevin nodded, "I'd hate for Castle to make good on the threats of ripping my guts out."

 _"I'd protect you,"_ Alexis promised.

"God, I wish I could kiss you right now," he groaned as he looked toward Castle only a few steps away.

 _"Me too,"_ Alexis agreed.

"I should hang up. Your dad's almost to me," Kevin said reluctantly.

 _"Sweet dreams, Kev,"_ Alexis smiled.

"Sweet dreams, Lex," he replied.

 _"See you in the morning,"_ Alexis said before she hung up.

"Night," he hung up the phone. Then he went through the sliding glass into the living room and laid down on the couch.

It was several minutes before he heard Castle reenter the house and trudge up the stairs to his bedroom.

-d-d-d-

"Thanks for not hurting him, Dad," Alexis said from her doorway.

"You're welcome. Go to sleep, Alexis."

"Dad," she called out to him.

"Yes, sweetie," he turned towards her.

"It was my choice as much as his," she reminded him.

"I know," Rick nodded. "But you're still my daughter."

"He is still one of your best friends."

"I don't get it, Alexis," he replied, "I don't understand how this all started. There were so many great guys out there for you."

"I think I found one of the best ones in the world," Alexis smiled.

"That's up for debate," Rick snorted.

"Dad, he's an amazing man that made a mistake."

"Does he make you happy?"

"Yes," Alexis smiled. "Even when I am having the worst day, he makes me happy."

"What else could a father want for his daughter?"

"Night, Dad."

"Goodnight, Sweetie."

-d-d-d-d-


	38. Chapter 23

Hope everyone's having a good week. Enjoy.

-d-d-d-d-

"Coffee?" Kate asked as she wandered into the kitchen.

"Just made it," Alexis smiled. "Late night, Kate?"

"Not the way you think," Kate smiled. "Where's Ryan?"

"Jogging."

"Any of the kids up yet?"

"Not that I've heard," Alexis shook her head.

"What smells so good?"

"Pear and honey muffins," Alexis smiled. "Dad and I hit the Farmer's Market on the way up yesterday. He promised to make strawberry pancakes."

"You're the only one that can get him to make those," Kate smiled.

"Not true," Alexis shook her head. "If Maggie or Jo give him the Bambi eyes, he'd do anything."

"Very true," Kate nodded just as she heard the door open and Kevin entered. "Morning, Ryan."

"Morning," Kevin responded a bit out of breath.

"Coffee?" Alexis held up a cup.

"Cop can't live it without it," Kevin took the cup from her immediately, resisting the urge to kiss her cheek

"I'm gonna get the paper," Kate excused herself with a smile.

"Kate has excellent timing," Alexis kissed Kevin the instant they were alone.

"How'd you sleep?" he smiled.

"I've slept better. I've slept worse," she replied, "You?"

"That couch is pretty comfortable," Kevin nodded.

"I would've slept better if you'd been in bed with me," Alexis whispered.

"Yes, but I think I would have ended up in a ditch somewhere," Kevin chuckled.

"Possibly," Alexis smiled. "I would've rescued you."

"If you'd known where to look," he replied, "Your dad is a writer. I'm sure he'd invent a crazy place to stash me.

All at once they heard thundering footsteps charging down the stairs.

"Sounds like a herd of elephants are approaching," Alexis laughed. Several of the children rounded the corner as Alexis and Kevin parted.

"Where's Grandpa?" Maggie asked. "I want pancakes."

"I think he's still sleeping, Princess," Alexis bent down and kissed the top of her daughter's head.

Maggie frowned and then smiled, "I'll wake him. C'mon Jo!"

"Guys, wait," Alexis started but the girls were off and running. "Oh well. I want pancakes too."

"I heard the stampede," Kate returned with the paper in her hands.

"Girls went up to wake Dad and the boys are-"

SPLASH!

"Out on the deck," Kate finished.

"Do you mind?" Alexis asked Kevin.

"You want me to pull them out?" he asked

"Just make sure they don't drown each other," Kate said.

"Will do," Kevin head out to keep an eye of the swimmers.

"Thanks," Kate nodded and then smiled at her friend's daughter as she came in. "Morning, Sarah Grace. I was wondering where you were."

Sarah Grace gave her a slight wave, but Alexis could see sadness in your eyes.

"You okay, Sweetie?" Kate put an arm around her shoulder.

"Not really," the ten year old shook her head. "Where's my dad?"

"Out on the deck," Alexis motioned.

Sarah Grace nodded and went out to sit next to him.

"You okay?" Kate asked her stepdaughter after seeing the sad look in her eyes.

"Her mother is never coming home, Kate."

"That was her own doing," Kate replied.

"I know, but I can't help feel a little responsible for this."

"You and Kevin are being entirely too hard on yourselves," Kate insisted.

"I love him, Kate," Alexis said.

"He loves you. Alexis, I found him in the hallway the night you were stabbed. He looked like his whole world had just collapsed."

"God, this entire situation just sucks," Alexis sighed.

"Yes, it does, but it will get better," Kate smiled. "I think your muffins are done."

"Oh, crap, I almost forgot about them," Alexis turned around and quickly pulled them out of the oven. They were a bit overdone but still edible.

"They look good," Kate smiled. "Where'd you get the recipe?"

"Chris's old partner, Meredith."

"I might have to get that from you."

"Which one of you sent these two little monsters to wake me up?" Rick entered dragging his foot as Maggie was hanging onto his leg and Jo was over his shoulder. Both were giggling with each step he took.

Alexis and Kate looked at each other and then back at Rick before saying in unison, "Kevin."

"Nuh-uh," Maggie challenged her mother, "You did it, Mommy."

"Traitor," Alexis bent down to be eye level with her daughter. "Didn't we agree you wouldn't tell on Mommy anymore?"

"No," Maggie shook her head vigorously from side to side.

"Well, is Grandpa going to make pancakes?"

"Perhaps if someone asks nicely," Rick took a cup of coffee from his wife.

"Jo, come here," Alexis motioned to her half-sister and put all their heads together and whispered for a moment before all three girls turned their pouts on Richard and said, "Please?"

"Talk about being ganged up on," Rick laughed.

"Is that a yes, or do we need to get Kate in on the act?"

"Enough," Rick began pulling items out of the cabinet to make his pancakes.

"Yes!" Maggie danced around.

"I'll go get the boys," Alexis started for the deck.

"Leave them," Rick waved his hand. "We'll eat outside."

"Good idea," Kate nodded.

-d-d-d-d-d-

It was mid-afternoon and Alexis was sitting on the edge of the deck watching her dad and Kevin chase around after all the kids on the beach when Kate sat down next to her. Her stepmother handed her a glass of iced tea.

"Thanks," Alexis smiled. "Dad mentioned something about the grill for dinner tonight."

"Yeah," Kate nodded, "Let's hope he doesn't burn dinner."

"Again," Alexis added with a laugh.

"Distracted, my ass," Kate snorted while recalling her husband's last attempt at grilling that had resulted in nothing more than charcoal.

Alexis giggled before she sobered, "Sarah Grace seems to be coming out of her shell a little."

"Kevin's cell phone rang again. I think it was Jenny's parents."

"That's gonna be a fun conversation."

"I certainly don't envy him and the position he's in."

"Neither do I," Alexis agreed quietly. "It was bad enough telling my dad. Kevin said he just blurted it out with you."

"I've been looking for a way to talk to you about all of that," Kate replied.

"I was wondering when you were gonna get around to it," Alexis nodded. "I know your loyalty is first and foremost to Kevin. I'm okay with that."

"How did it all start?" Kate asked.

"It was just coffee at first," Alexis said. "His marriage was going to hell, and he needed to talk to someone who wouldn't automatically tell him to try and fix things with Jenny."

"So you were just friends first?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded.

"How did it progress to more?"

"I can't pinpoint the exact moment it changed, but I can tell you when we acted on it," Alexis said.

"Kevin already told me it was the weekend Rick and I went to visit my aunt," Kate replied.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "God, I freaked out the next morning. I woke up, saw him laying there, and panicked."

"So what happened?"

"I got up, got dressed, and left the loft," Alexis confessed. "I figured if I stayed gone long enough he'd leave. Of course, in my haste, I left my cell phone. When I called it, he answered. He said he was holding my phone hostage until I agreed to talk to him."

"You can tell me it's none of my business, but it's the mother in me coming out. You were safe, weren't you?"

"We were," Alexis nodded, "Most of the time. Obviously once we forgot, or it malfunctioned."

"After he got you talking to him," Kate prodded her.

"Right," Alexis nodded. "I met with him after work at Gram's old studio. He said he wasn't sorry. I realized I wasn't either, at least not about being with him. I was sorry for sleeping with a married man and for how it would hurt his wife if she found out."

Kate sighed a little at the thought of what Jenny had pulled, trying to keep her marriage together. She had loved Alexis like a daughter and as a friend for even longer. Because of some misguided feeling of right and wrong, Alexis had nearly left this world.

"Kate?"

"I'm sorry," Kate shook her head. "I was just thinking."

"I figured," Alexis offered her wrist to Kate with a grin, "Wanna take my pulse to reassure yourself that I'm still here?"

"It still seems impossible what Jenny pulled," Kate shook her head.

"Tell me about it," Alexis sighed. "Don't tell my dad this, but I'm glad she came after me and not Hunter or Kevin."

"I'd rather she dealt with everything like a normal human being," Kate replied.

"That would've been nice," Alexis's eyes found Sarah Grace on the beach. "I walked away from Kevin because I didn't want him to lose his daughter. The night I left, he said he loved me. I told him to love someone else."

"But he couldn't do it," Kate replied.

"If he'd stopped or caught me, I don't know what would've happened," Alexis confessed tearfully.

"You can't look back, Lex," Kate responded.

"It's hard not to sometimes," Alexis said. "It's also hard to look at Sarah Grace and know that her world is about to fall apart."

Kate rubbed Alexis's back as they both watched the kids run around with Kevin and Rick.

"Are you hungry?" Kate asked her stepdaughter, "How much effort do you think it will take to get the guys in to do a bit of grilling?"

"Depends on how hungry they all are," Alexis stated before calling out to the kids. Sure enough they were all famished and practically begged Rick and Kevin to start dinner.

"Come on, Mags," Alexis said. "Let's get that sand off of you. Boys, before you go diving into the pool, I want you to use the shower, too."

"Jo, Jamie, Ian, that goes for you too," Kate said.

There was a chorus of moans as the children marched into house to rinse off while Rick and Kevin began working on getting the grill going.

"Sarah Grace, do you want to shower off?" Kate asked.

"Yes, please," she nodded hesitantly.

"Come on, then," Kate encouraged her.

Hunter and Cade came tearing back out and cannon balled into the pool, sending a spray towards Rick and Kevin.

"Kate, did you need help with dinner?" Alexis offered.

"Yeah, come make that potato salad you're so good at," Kate nodded. "I'll work on the barbecue sauce. Jo, make sure you and Maggie stay in the shallow end please."

Kate's daughter bobbed her head before she called out for her father to watch her cannonball demonstration.

Alexis's brothers sped past her and letting out identical 'bonsai' yells landed in the pool with splashes.

"They are way too much like Dad," Alexis sighed.

"Good thing Jo's like Kate," Kevin smiled.

"Tell me about it. Dad might be able to get rid of Gram's studio after all."

"He still has it?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "He kept it in case one of my kids or siblings got bitten by the acting bug."

"I'm surprised you didn't," Kevin munched on a piece of cheese. "Your mom's an actress and so was your grandma."

"I don't think I'm dramatic enough."

"True. You are frighteningly down to earth."

"That's my father's influence," Kate replied.

"What do you mean?" Kevin asked.

"Jim's the one who steered me towards medical school. Though he wanted me to go to school in Pennsylvania."

"Why Pennsylvania?" Kevin asked.

"One of his friends was on faculty at Llanview University and actually Dad agreed with him. I have family there."

"How'd you decide on Tulane then?"

"Distance," Alexis said quietly. "Seemed like a good idea."

"Can we talk after dinner?"

"Yeah, maybe," Alexis nodded.

"Here," Kate handed Kevin a plate of steaks and burgers, "Give these to Castle and get cooking."

"Yes, Ma'am," Kevin took the plate and headed back outside.

Alexis got to work on her potato salad.

"You know, if you'd lived in Pennsylvania, you never would have met Christopher," Kate said.

"I know," Alexis nodded, "I'm grateful for my decision because he was a wonderful man and father."

"But?"

"I don't know."

"It's okay to second guess your decision. It doesn't mean that you loved Chris any less."

"God, I miss him," Alexis hugged herself for a moment as a chill went down her spine.

"I know you do," Kate gave her a hug. "What did he always tell you to remember if something went wrong?"

"That we'd see each other again someday," Alexis recalled.

"And you will," Kate replied.

"Thanks, Kate," Alexis smiled.

"Of course," Kate smiled.

 _Give me back my floaties, Cade!_

"Remind me again, why did I want children?" Alexis went out to the deck.

Kate snorted as she took over Alexis's potato salad.

d=d=d=d

Kevin looked out through the French doors at the beach laid out before him. His eyes were on Alexis as she sat on the beach, watching the waves crash against the shore, seemingly in her own little world.

"Go on," Rick encouraged. "I think you two need to talk."

Kevin opened the door. Before he knew it he was standing next to her with a light sweatshirt in his hands that he wrapped around her shoulders.

"You looked chilled," Kevin explained when she jumped mildly in surprise.

"Thanks," she played with the cuffs of the shirt he'd given her. "Why don't you sit down?"

Kevin took a seat in the sand next to her. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm better. It's been nice to sleep in a real bed," Alexis smiled. "Kate said you and Sarah Grace were going to a hotel tonight."

"Yeah, I can't bring myself to go back to our apartment in the city just yet, and it's a bit crowded here at the beach house," Kevin explained.

"Javi called to check on me. He said you and Jenny got pretty loud when you went into interrogation."

"It wasn't my finest moment," he frowned, "I figured it was okay to lose my cool this time. It's not every day you find out that your wife hired someone to murder the woman you love."

Alexis looked at him, "Are you okay?"

"Are you?"

"I felt threatened when Jenny came to me all those years ago and told me if I didn't end it with you she'd take Sarah away from you, but I never thought she'd take it this far."

"I know the feeling," he nodded, "I was married to the woman for over a decade. How could I not know?"

"I feel responsible," Alexis frowned, "It was our involvement that started all of this. It's because of us that Sarah Grace will have to grow up without her mother."

"This is not your fault."

"If I hadn't come back here after Christopher died then-"

"I would've come to you."

"What?"

"When your dad told us you were married, I felt like I was sleepwalking. I feel bad for saying this, but when he told us Christopher had been killed, and it was like I woke up. I was going to give you time to grieve and get myself free. When all of that was done, I was coming after you."

"You make it sound like I was one of those perps that you've spent your career chasing," Alexis replied.

"You are anything but," he took her hand and brought it to his lips.

Alexis smiled at him and leaned close to put her forehead against his, "He met you, you know… Christopher."

"When?" Kevin was surprised by the revelation.

"Chris's lawyer had a letter for me after everything was settled. I didn't read it right away because everything was still too raw. A few nights before I was stabbed, I couldn't sleep, so I read it. After Cade was born, Chris started thinking how he'd feel if things were reversed and you were raising his son. That's the first time he said I should tell you."

"He sounds like a good man," Kevin replied, "I probably would have liked him, that is if we didn't both love the same woman."

"He came up to the city and tracked you down. I'm not sure how the meeting happened, but he said something about a bar, a few beers, and some war stories. He also told me that he'd never seen someone trying so hard to pretend that he wasn't completely miserable."

"Do you have a picture of him?" Kevin asked, "Maybe it would jar the memory."

"Not on me," Alexis shook her head. "There are some in the house though. The important part is the end of the letter. It's part of how I knew Chris was getting to me when we first got together. I'd had a really bad day, and he was the first person I thought of when I wanted to talk to someone. To this day, I still have that same feeling. He said when that changed, it was okay."

"That day you cancelled on me," Kevin thought out loud. "We were supposed to get a drink."

"It was the first time in over eight years that I'd had a bad day, and he wasn't the first person I thought of when I wanted to talk to someone," Alexis nodded.

"And that is okay," Kevin replied.

"I miss him," she frowned, "I feel like I'm betraying him. He hasn't even been gone for a year, and I'm already thinking about moving on. How can I do that to him? I loved him…I still love him."

"And he loved you," Kevin told her. "If it'd been you that died, how long would you want him to wait?"

"As long as he needed," she replied.

"Everyone grieves differently, Lex."

"I love you," she said softly. "Please believe that."

"I've never doubted it, even after all these years."

Alexis shifted so that she was leaning against Kevin's chest, sitting between his legs, her head tipped back on his shoulder, "How do we do this? Sarah is ten, and you still have to tell her that her mother's never coming home again. Hunter is eight, and I have to tell him that the man he called 'dad' isn't his biological father."

"We take it one step at a time," he held her close remembering nights they'd done this with nothing but sheets between them, "We don't need to tell Hunter anything just yet. He's still grieving for Chris."

"And Sarah Grace?" Alexis asked, "What do we tell her?"

Kevin sighed, "I don't know. Jenny's parents keep calling. I don't know what to say to them."

"The truth works," Alexis wasn't able to keep the bitterness out of her voice.

"That while married to their daughter I fell in love with the daughter of one of my best friends," Kevin snickered.

"They raised a psychopath."

"Yeah, I don't see that going over well."

"No, it won't," she played with Kevin's hand without looking and then raised her head to stare at his hand, "When did you stop wearing your wedding ring?"

"When I decided to divorce her," he explained.

"You really wanted to give us a chance, didn't you?"

"Every day since you left New York," Kevin confessed.

"I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you," she replied, "You didn't tell anyone about us?"

"I almost told my sister," he replied, "I really wanted to get it out, but I just couldn't. I guess I didn't want to see that disappointing look on her face."

"Gwen?"

"Yeah," Kevin shook his head.

"How is she?"

"She and Frank are doing okay," Kevin nodded. "We should get back to the house. It's getting late."

Alexis inhaled, "A few more minutes? I like this."

"How can I turn down the offer to spend more time alone with you?"

Alexis giggled, "Charmer."

"So where are we, Lex?" he asked.

"We're slowly approaching the point where I ask you to stay the night after you bring me home from a date," Alexis turned her head to look at him.

"It would be nice to wake up next to you outside of a hospital," he allowed himself to fantasize for a moment.

"Yes, it would," Alexis nodded. "It's been a long time since we did."

"Too long," he agreed.

"I like this," Alexis admitted as she let her head fall back against his shoulder again and closed her eyes.

"You have no idea," Kevin said as he grinned against her neck.

-d-d-d-d-

Rick finished putting the dishes away and closed the dishwasher. Kate watched him with a smile.

"What?"

"Sometimes I forget how domestic you can be," Kate smiled.

"Because I'm doing dishes?"

"You cooked and cleaned tonight," she reminded him.

"It felt nice to do something normal after everything we've just been through," Rick admitted.

"It has been a stressful time for us all."

"Where's Alexis?" he looked over his wife's shoulder.

"She and Kevin came up from the beach and are sitting out by the pool. Sarah Grace is asleep upstairs with Maggie and Jo."

"I'm still not fully okay with all of this, but…"

"You're such a sucker for a happy ending," she teased.

"He loves her," Castle smiled. "I am still in shock about that, but he does."

"Does that mean you've forgiven me for not telling you when I found out?"

"Yes," he nodded. "Should we join them outside?"

"No," Kate wrapped her arms around his shoulders, "We should leave them alone."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Rick smiled. "Where are the boys?"

*Crash!*

"Playing in the living room," Kate winced.

They both darted towards the living room to survey the damage.

"Well, I never liked that vase, and Mother's Tony is still in one piece."

"We're sorry," the boys apologized in unison.

"It's okay, guys," Kate assured her sons and step-grandsons. "Why don't you get ready for bed? We'll be up soon."

The four boys quickly darted out of the room before any punishment could be thought up.

"We heard a noise," Alexis and Kevin entered the room. "What-oh. Are they hiding?"

"No," Kate laughed, "We sent them up to get ready for bed."

"At least Gram's Tony is still in one piece," Alexis remarked.

"That's what your father said," Kate began picking up the pieces of the broken vase.

"Why don't you guys go up and get some rest? We'll clean this up," Alexis suggested.

"That sounds like a good idea. Hey, Ryan, it's too late to take Sarah Grace to a hotel. Stay another night. We have plenty of room," Kate stated.

"Are you sure?" Kevin looked nervously towards Castle. He didn't want to make Alexis's father uncomfortable, hence the reason he suggested the hotel in the first place.

"It's okay, Kevin," Rick assured him.

"Okay," Kevin nodded.

"Come on, Castle, we should look in on the boys."

"Frisk Hunter. He's been taking his video game to bed lately."

"Boys and their video games," Kate snickered, "Will do. Nite, Alexis, nite, Kevin."

"Night," Kevin waved as he helped Alexis scoop up the pieces of vase.

"Night," Castle followed his wife.

Alexis took all the pieces and dumped them in the recycling bin. Then she joined Kevin back in the living room.

"You tired?" she asked.

"No, but you look exhausted," he ran his hands along her arms.

"Yeah, sleep's been a little elusive, even with the medication," Alexis admitted.

"Considering what you went through, I can imagine," he nodded.

Alexis laced their fingers together, "No screaming nightmares, but there are always a few moments of panic where I wake up and can't get back to sleep."

"How upset with me do you think Castle would be if we bunked together tonight?"

"I think if it helps me sleep, he'll get over it," Alexis smiled.

"Are you willing to risk his wrath?" he raised a brow.

"I can handle it."

"Okay," he nodded. "Let's go to sleep."

"Follow me," she lead him out of the room.

They walked upstairs, and Alexis went into the bathroom to change while Kevin changed into sweatpants from his weekender bag. When she hadn't emerged after ten minutes, Kevin poked his head in and found her staring in the mirror, her fingers brushing over the scars on her side.

Kevin brushed her fingers away so he could exam the scars for himself.

"Pretty hideous, aren't they?" she asked quietly.

"I don't think there could be anything hideous about you," he ran his fingers slowly along her skin.

"I think you're biased," Alexis said.

"Never claimed that I wasn't."

She turned around to face him, "I don't remember a lot of what happened, but I remember hearing you ordering me to stay with you."

"I'm glad you listened," he cupped her face, his finger tracing her lips softly.

"Yeah, me too. I don't think I've ever heard you sound that scared," Alexis recalled.

"I don't know that I've ever been that scared."

Alexis wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly, "I'm okay."

Kevin pressed his lips against her forehead and soaked in her warmth.

"You know that moment we're getting closer to," Alexis asked. "The one where I ask you to stay after we get home from a date?"

"Yeah," he nodded slightly.

"I think we're going to have to include the hot tub I have on my balcony when it happens," Alexis smiled.

" Why is that?" he chuckled softly.

"Because I like the idea of soaking in it with you."

"Then we should discuss when this date will be."

"Tomorrow, huh? You're looking a little tired," Alexis said before she tried to hide a yawn.

"So do you."

"Then let's go to bed," Alexis smiled.

Kevin pulled her back to the bedroom. Once she'd lain down, he curled in against her. "Sleep well, Lex."

"I love you, Kev," she slipped into sleep.

"I love you, Lex," he kissed her temple. He watched her sleep for several minutes before he was able to find sleep himself.


	39. Moonlight Interlude

Alexis shot up in bed, her hand on her side. She lifted it to eye level and felt her fingers with her other hand. She breathed out quietly when there was no slick blood on them.

"Lex, everything alright?" Kevin reached out to her after turning on the light.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "Go back to sleep."

"Lay with me," he patted the empty space at his side.

Alexis lay back down and smiled when Kevin draped her legs over his like she was sitting on his lap.

"I remember this," she smiled.

"You used to get nightmares every now and then about your kidnapping," he rubbed circles into her back, "You said this helped."

"It did," she took his free hand into hers. "I missed it."

"You want to talk about it?" he asked.

"Just images and pain," Alexis said. "Nothing clear, except red. I saw blood."

"You don't remember hearing or seeing anything?" he asked.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "Your voice came to me through the darkness that I felt wanting to swallow me whole."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "You said you loved me."

"I don't know what I would have done if I lost you for good."

Alexis put his hand over her heart and smiled at him, "Still here."

"Thankfully," he brought her hand to his lips.

Alexis smiled at him and then shifted closer while closing her eyes, "Tell me a story."

"I'm a little rusty on my fairytales," he admitted, "Sarah Grace said she's outgrown them."

"Tell me a story about you then," Alexis smiled. "Tell me about your undercover days."

"Those aren't really the types of stories to put your mind at ease," he responded.

"Okay, then make up a story," Alexis frowned. "This isn't supposed to be that hard."

"Once upon a time, there was an Irishman that fell in love with a princess," Kevin began.

"Really, that's what you're going with," she snorted.

"Think you can do better?"

"Not right now," Alexis smiled. "Keep going. Was the Irishman handsome?"

"He was alright," Kevin smiled, "But it was the princess that had everyone's attention. She had beautiful red hair, a smile that lit up the sky, and eyes that sparkled like sapphires."

"Sounds like he did alright," Alexis giggled softly. "Did he fall in love at first sight?"

"Everyone fell in love with the princess at first sight," he laughed, "But she had a very protective father."

"I bet the Irishman was determined," Alexis smiled.

"So was the princess."

"Did she love him back?"

"The Irishman grew on her," he replied.

"I'll bet he was charming. What did he look like?"

"Tall, dark and handsome," he deadpanned.

"That's too bad," Alexis frowned, "The princess doesn't seem like she'd be the type to fall for the arrogant type."

"Okay then how about on the short side but still very cute," Kevin posed.

"Much better," Alexis smiled.

"He had a good sense of humor and the smoothest moves on the dance floor," he added.

"I bet he made the princess feel safe when he held her," Alexis said softly.

"He certainly did his best," he nodded.

"What were their obstacles?"

"The princess's over protective father for one," he replied.

"I'll bet the princess had her father wrapped around her finger. Next?"

"There was a red headed witch that wanted the Irishman for herself."

"Bet she cast a spell to make herself look young and innocent," Alexis frowned.

"And for a time it fooled the Irishman," Kevin said quietly.

"I bet the princess didn't hold that against him," Alexis caressed his cheek softly.

"No, she was more forgiving than he deserved."

"Because she loved him," her fingers continued to trace the contours of his face, paying particular attention to his lips. "I loved kissing you. I could do it for hours."

"We did, remember?" he smiled. "The night we had the loft to ourselves?"

"I remember," she smirked.

"Sitting in front of the fire, with nothing but sheets between us," Kevin continued.

"I felt your heartbeat against my back," Alexis said softly. "It made me feel safe."

"It felt like we were in our own world," he threaded his fingers with hers.

"Sometimes I wish we could go back there," she sighed, "Back to when things were simpler."

"I can give us some of that night back. We do have to stay clothed this time."

"Where's the fun in that?" she gave a teasing grin.

"Come on," he pulled her up gently and grabbed the top sheet from the bed. "No fire, but how about the crash of waves?"

"That's a good substitute," she agreed. His arms came around her shoulders, pulling her back against his chest.

Alexis tipped her head back against Kevin's shoulder and smiled when she felt his lips against her skin. She'd missed this. This was something that had been solely for her and Kevin.

"This hurt?" he ran his fingers gently over the bandages that hid her still healing wounds.

"Not right now," she murmured. "Did seeing them freak you out before?"

"It freaked me out when the blood was oozing out," he nipped at her shoulder.

Alexis smiled a little and picked up his hand, tracing the lines on his palm gently, "You and me both."

"I'm sorry I put you in the middle of it all. If was my fault this all happened to you in the first place."

Alexis shook her head and then angled it so she could look him in the eye, "Please don't do that to yourself. It's not your fault."

"Then whose fault is it?" he asked, "If we had never gotten involved, Jenny wouldn't have had reason to hire someone to stab you."

"Hunter wouldn't exist," Alexis said softly. "I'll take the stab wounds any day if it means that our boy exists."

"You are an amazing woman," Kevin spoke in her ear, his voice full of wonderment. He'd always been in awe of her ability to find the positive, even in the most negative of events.

"Thank you," Alexis smiled as she wiggled her toes in the night air.

"Think you can get back to sleep yet?" he asked.

"Right here," she nodded as she snuggled into him.

"Sleep well, Alexis," he kissed her cheek, "I'll be right here, keeping you safe."

"I know," she nodded as her eyes closed. "I love you."

"I love you."


	40. Chapter 24

"How long have you been awake?" Alexis smiled when she felt Kevin stroking her chin gently.

"Couple of minutes," he twitched in surprise, "I nearly forgot how beautiful you were when you slept."

"The most adorable mouth breather ever, right?" she opened her eyes to see his baby blue's staring back at her. She felt her ankles tangled with Kevin's.

Kevin chuckled, his fingers tangled in her hair. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"You didn't," she assured him, "How'd you sleep?"

"Pretty good, actually," he nodded. "I forgot how easy it is to sleep out here."

"Crash of the waves and the smell of salt always did put you right out," Alexis smiled.

"When you're in my arms," he added, "I've missed this."

Alexis bit her lip as she smiled and nodded, "Thank you for being here last night. You're pretty good at calming my nerves."

"Glad to be of service," he bent in and pressed his lips to hers.

 _Ding-Dong_

"It's barely seven in the morning," Alexis checked her alarm clock. "Who the hell is that?"

"That's got to be Javi," he groaned.

Alexis sighed and sat up slowly to not tear at her stitches, "One of us should get that."

"Let Castle or Beckett have the honors," he tried to pull her back to him, "You're still recovering."

"You and Kate left right from the station, right? Your mom dropped your bags and Sarah Grace off for you, so you wouldn't have to take a detour," Alexis double-checked.

"Yeah," he confirmed, "What's your point?"

"Where did Kate put her gun?"

Kevin frowned in confusion. He had no idea what she was thinking at the moment.

"Have you ever dealt with Kate before she's had her morning coffee?"

"I'll get the door," Kevin pushed the covers away. "Rest."

"I'm f-"

"Please?" Kevin gave her a charming smile.

Alexis snuggled back into her bed and returned Kevin's smile with one of her own.

"I got it," Kevin told a stumbling Rick when they met in the hallway outside Alexis's room, "Go back to bed, Castle."

Rick was half asleep and quickly did an about face to return to his bedroom. He completely missed the fact that Kevin had emerged from Alexis's bedroom.

Kevin opened the door with a jaw cracking yawn, "You better have coffee."

"What took so long, Bro?" Javi asked instantly.

"It's seven in the morning, _Bro_ ," Kevin gave a sarcastic response, "I was asleep. What the heck are you doing here so early?"

"No traffic, and he drives like a mad man. How do you ever give him the keys?" Lanie replied.

"You get used to riding with your eyes closed," Kevin snorted.

Javi began to sputter in defense of his driving skills.

Lanie and Kevin traded curious winks, "We brought muffins."

"Please tell me they are from that bakery on Main Street. Alexis brought pastries from there during one of our weekends away. They taste almost as good as my mother's baking," Kevin backed away to allow them inside.

"You're not the only one that Alexis shared her taste in pastries with," Lanie held up the bag to show him the bakery's name. "How's Alexis?"

"She's asleep, and so was I," Kevin said.

"Thought you were sleeping on the couch," Javi studied his partner, "Anything you need to tell me?"

"No," Kevin responded quickly. "What kind of muffins do you have, Lanie?"

"I had the bakery provide an assortment. I made sure to throw in a few chocolate chip zucchini for you," Lanie winked at him.

"Bless you," Kevin smiled. "If you want to see Lex, her room's up the stairs and down the hall to the left."

"We can wait for her to wake up," Lanie assured him, "Just point me in the direction of the beach. I'll entertain myself until the household wakes up."

"Straight out the doors," Kevin point. "Just watch out for the pool."

"Go ahead, Lanie," Javi replied, "I'll be there in a minute."

"Play nice you two," Lanie smiled.

"You can't get anything past me, Partner," Javi glared at Kevin when Lanie made her way towards the beach. "What's with the bounce in your step?"

"We just slept in the same bed last night," Kevin responded, "It was completely…almost completely innocent."

"There's more to it than just sleeping," Javi insisted.

"We talked," Kevin admitted.

"And?"

"She finally let me in again."

"Meaning?"

"She let me see her scars and comfort her when she woke from a nightmare."

"Are you back together?" Javi asked.

"We're on the right path," Kevin replied.

"I'm glad for you," Javier patted his partner's back. "I hope it works out."

"It will," Kevin responded, "I won't let it fail a second time."

"Good," Javier said. "Go back upstairs. I'll fix breakfast."

"Fix breakfast?" Kevin snorted, "I think Lanie took care of that for you with the muffins."

"I can make eggs and bacon," Javier said.

"Just keep it away from the smoke alarms."

"Funny," Javier shooed him away.

"Javi and Lanie?" Alexis asked when Kevin returned to her bedroom with two cups of freshly brewed coffee.

"Yep," Kevin put the coffee on her nightstand and laid down next to her.

"We should get up."

"No," Kevin shook his head. "We should stay here as long as we can."

"We don't want to be rude to our guests," she replied.

"They aren't guests, they're Javi and Lanie," Kevin replied, "They're family."

Alexis giggled, "You are terrible."

"Anything to stay in bed with you for as long as possible," he kissed her cheek.

"I'd love nothing more than to spend all day in bed with you, but we need to get up before any of our kids wake and find us like this," she smiled, "And Mags is perpetually nosy."

"I hate when you get rational on me," he groaned into the pillow.

"I know, but one of us has to be," she teased.

"Darn it," he sighed, "I hate that you're right."

"Besides, I have to change my dressing," Alexis reminded him.

"Did you need help?" he caressed her injured side gently.

"It is a bit challenging doing it by myself," Alexis admitted after a moment.

"I'll get the bandages," he stated.

"Thank you," Alexis sat up.

After taking a few minutes to redress her wounds, they dressed for the day and made their way down to the kitchen.

"Hey, Javi," Alexis hugged the older man.

"How you feeling, Lex?" he hugged her gently.

"Getting better every day," she replied, "I should be ready to go back to work soon."

"Not too soon," Javi responded, "Let those stitches heal first, Doc."

"You're such a spoilsport," Alexis stuck out her tongue at him.

"We have muffins and eggs," Javier ignored her childish action.

"Muffins look great," Alexis looked over the choices.

"Lanie's on the beach. Kids?"

"They're still asleep," Kevin smiled.

"I'll start some bacon," Javi suggested, "They'll be down in a heartbeat."

"Good plan," Alexis smiled over her coffee. "Dad will follow."

Javi pulled out a pan and began frying bacon. Sure enough Rick and the kids came running.

"Uncle Javi," Sarah Grace greeted him with a hug.

"Hey, Princess," Javier squeezed her tight. "How you doing?"

"Okay," she smiled a little. "Are you staying?"

"For the day," he nodded, "Are you hungry?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"Good, then let's eat," Javier smiled.

Alexis noticed Kevin's look and took his hand covertly, squeezing gently.

He smiled at her and squeezed back.

-d-d-d-d-

"I can too still freak out my dad, Javi," Alexis scoffed in the middle of a disagreement with Javi.

"Your father is completely shockproof when it comes to you and Kevin," Javi insisted.

"Not even close," Alexis laughed out.

"I'm still surprised he hasn't said anything about seeing me coming out of your room."

"If it was before his coffee, he wouldn't remember," Alexis replied.

Kevin nodded in agreement, "Good point."

"You can't freak your dad out anymore," Javi said.

"How about a bet?" Alexis suggested.

"I'm listening," Javi nodded.

"Fifty bucks says I can get Dad to freak out about me and Kevin by sundown."

"You're on, Doc," Javier immediately snapped up the wager.

"Come on," Alexis took Kevin's hand.

"You're planning something," Kevin replied.

"Just keep a straight face," Alexis told him.

"Okay," Kevin nodded as they walked over to the bar where Rick was making drinks.

"No alcohol for you, Daughter Dear," Rick told his daughter.

"I know, Dad," Alexis said. "I'm actually having an argument with Kevin."

"Need a neutral third party to mediate?" Rick asked, "I'm happy to help however I can."

"No, he just needs to realize that I'm sleeping on the left side of the bed, but as long as he's polite and opens doors for me, he might get some-"

"Alexis!" Rick exclaimed.

Alexis laughed and turned towards Javi, "Pay up, Buddy."

"Not fair," Javi gave her the money.

"I can't believe you fell for that, Castle," Lanie laughed.

"Easy money," Alexis pocketed the money.

"Wait," Rick said. "What am I missing?"

"It's a song, Castle," Kate said. "Dear Future Husband by Meghan Trainor."

"And really, Dad, don't have such a dirty mind," Alexis teased.

"How does that line end?"

"Just be a classy guy, buy me a ring, buy-buy me a ring," Lanie sang.

"Lanie, you need a record deal," Alexis replied.

"Thanks, Sweetie," Lanie smiled. "That's for my second act. I'm still working on my first."

"Speaking of working on things," Kate said. "What's for dinner, Rick?"

"Steak again?"

"No more steak," Maggie moaned.

"Kate, do we have chopped meat?"

"Yes," Kate nodded. "I took it out in case we wanted burgers."

"Great. I'm making meatloaf."

"Yay!" Maggie and Jo cheered.

"My mommy makes the bestest meatloaf," Maggie boasted.

"Good answer," Alexis ran her fingers through her daughter's hair. "Let's go."

Maggie took her mother's hand and followed her into the kitchen. Alexis had made her daughter a special meatloaf helper when she'd become old enough to help in the kitchen.

After a moment she stuck her head back out, "Jo? Sarah Grace? You coming or what?"

Jo and Sarah Grace darted along, eager to pitch in where they could.

"Should we help too?" Lanie asked Kate.

"Alexis, did you need any help?" Kate called after her stepdaughter.

"I think the four of us have it covered," Alexis whirled towards them, "Enjoy the sunshine."

"Does that answer your question?" Kate said to Lanie as she picked up a drink and wandered to the edge of the deck while shooting a look at Kevin.

"Can we talk, Kate?" Kevin ambled over.

"I gave you and myself some space while we were solving Alexis's case and waiting for her to get out of the hospital. I know you've had a talk with Rick. A talk between you and me is a good idea."

"Let's go for a walk," Kevin suggested.

"Yeah, sounds good," Kate nodded. They walked out onto the beach and started to stroll along the water's edge. "I know how it started and how it escalated. I have a good picture of how it ended. I guess I just want to know why."

"I love her," Kevin responded, "I knew I shouldn't, but I couldn't help myself."

"She's easy to love, that's pretty obvious," Kate smiled. "I know we've been off since everything. I'm not mad at you. I can't be. I've always been good at hiding my feelings too."

"I would have told you everything if I could," Kevin responded, "I was never ashamed of being with Alexis."

Kate stopped and looked at him, "How could I not have known? She was miserable and looking back, so were you."

"For a lot of years," Kevin nodded.

"I would've been on your side," Kate said. "I love Rick, and I would have helped him realize the choice was Alexis's to make. You made Alexis happy. I would've been on your side."

"I believe you, but I would never force you to pick sides," Kevin replied, "Especially against your husband."

"Still, I would've gone to bat for you," Kate smiled. "Right after I beat your ass for sleeping with Alexis while you were still married."

"Thank you for that," Kevin snorted.

"I get why you didn't tell me," Kate said. "I even appreciate it."

"I never wanted you or Javi to have to lie for me."

"That's the Kevin I've always known, noble to the core."

"Yeah, that's me," Kevin responded sarcastically.

Kate put her hand on his arm, "You finally got her back, remember? That's what you said to me in the hallway of the hospital."

"And I'm never letting go again," Kevin replied.

"Good," Kate smiled as she hugged him.

"Does that mean we have your blessing?"

"It's not like you need it, but yes," Kate pulled back to smile at him. "You also have the promise that as long as you make Alexis happy, I'm on your side."

"Thanks, Beckett," Kevin smiled. "I'm gonna head back. You coming?"

"Be there in sec," Kate nodded.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just want to breathe in the fresh air, get some of that city stuff out of my lungs while I still can."

"Alright, I'll tell Castle you'll be right in."

"Thanks, Ryan," Kate smiled.

"Sure," Kevin headed back for the house.

Kate looked up to the sky and smiled, "Thank you for keeping her here."

"Who you thanking?" Rick slipped his arms around her.

"Whoever is watching over Alexis," Kate relaxed into his arms, "Most likely your mom and mine."

"The drive to the hospital, I begged Christopher to let her stay," Rick confessed.

"It would have been like losing one of my own if we'd lost her," Kate felt herself choking up.

"She's been yours for a long time, Kate," Rick told her. "You've been more of a mom to her in the last fifteen years than Meredith ever was."

"I still can't believe that Jenny was behind it all," Kate shook her head in disbelief.

"Jealousy does bad things to people's minds," Rick said.

"But to actually hire someone to kill Alexis," Kate replied, "We knew this woman. I thought we were friends even."

"I know," Rick nodded. "We were at their wedding."

"I've run this through my head a dozen different ways, and I still don't get it," Kate stated, "I get being angry, hurt, maybe even wanting to take a swing at Alexis, but…"

"It's an irrational act by an irrational person," Rick replied, "Sometimes bad things can't be explained. We need to focus on the here and now. We need to help Alexis, Kevin and Sarah Grace get beyond it all."

"When I stop trying to get my mind around it, I get so damn angry at her," Kate confessed. "She's a mother, Rick. She's a mother, and she tried to kill the only parent our grandkids have left."

"I know how you feel," Rick told her. "I get mad at her too."

"How do we get beyond this ourselves?" Kate asked.

"By remembering that she's still here," Rick smiled. "Jenny failed. Alexis is still here."

"Thank god," Kate turned to hug her husband tight.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis smiled over the railing at her dad and Kate as she finished setting the table.

"How's the meatloaf coming?" Kevin stepped in behind her.

"Still cooking," she replied, "It needs a good hour."

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, just enjoying seeing my dad happy."

"When do you think we should tell the children about us?" Kevin wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I know you told Sarah Grace about her mom," Alexis said. "How'd she take that?"

"As well as she could," Kevin swallowed hard.

"She's going to need time to process that before we can add something like this," Alexis replied, "This is some serious stuff she's dealing with."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"Please don't think I'm stalling," Alexis said. "I want a life with you more than you can know, but it's not just us, Kevin."

"You're right," he agreed, "And your kids are still dealing with Chris's death."

"I wonder," Alexis smiled a little. "You said that you and he probably would've gotten along except for being in love with the same woman thing. Do you really think that?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "We're both officers of the law. I'm sure we would have found a lot of things to talk about."

"You have the same taste in women, too," she smirked over her shoulder.

"That's where it would have gotten complicated," he chuckled.

"We can't sleep in the same bed tonight," she frowned.

"Yeah, I know, I'm heading back to the city with Javi and Lanie," he replied.

"And my dad wants us to stay a few more days," Alexis said. "Will you call before you go to sleep?"

"Of course," he kissed her bare shoulder.

"Good," Alexis smiled. "I'll hold the phone out so you can hear the ocean."

"If only you could add in the smell of the salt air and your perfume," he replied.

Alexis smiled, "Thanks for that."

"Come on, let's go see how dinner's coming," Kevin took her hand.

"Yeah, I'd better check on my masterpiece," Alexis replied.

=d=d=d=

Alexis picked up the phone with a smile, "I think I should join the circus."

 _"And why would you say that?"_ Kevin asked.

"I'd make a good contortionist. If you could see how I had to bend my body to reapply my bandages, you wouldn't have believed it."

 _"I wish I'd been there to help you,"_ he frowned.

"I'll manage," Alexis assured him, "Did you and Sarah Grace get back to your mom's alright?"

 _"Yeah,"_ Kevin shut the door to his childhood bedroom and looked around. _"My mom did not change a single thing in my old room. It's weird."_

"Did she find your Playboy?"

 _"I_ never _had any Playboys,"_ he responded defensively.

"Oh you _lie_ ," Alexis giggled.

 _"Didn't need them,"_ Kevin felt himself beginning to blush, _"Victoria Secret was more than enough for me."_

"Right, houseful of girls," Alexis nodded. "You should feel this breeze. It's amazing."

 _"Are you trying to torture me?"_ Kevin groaned.

"Sorry," Alexis smiled as she leaned against the doorframe. "There's heat lightning."

 _"You're going to haunt my dreams tonight."_

"You think you won't be in mine?" Alexis asked.

 _"I'm hoping so,"_ he replied. _"When are you coming back to the city?"_

"Probably by Wednesday," Alexis said. "I don't have work, but Kate does."

 _"Can we see each other on Thursday?"_

"There's a distinct possibility," Alexis said.

 _"How do we go from possibility to an absolute definite?"_

"I'll call you when I am back in the city," Alexis promised. "Until then, let's make this a ritual."

 _"It's a date,"_ he smiled, _"Sleep well, Alexis."_

"Sweet dreams, Kevin," Alexis smiled. "Goodnight."

"Mommy, will you read to me?" Maggie came in with a book just as Alexis was hanging up the phone.

"You're supposed to be in bed, Maggie Mae," Alexis patted a space on her bed for her daughter.

"Couldn't sleep," she looked up with big eyes.

"What story are we reading tonight?" Alexis took the book from her daughter's hand.

"Rapunzel," Maggie smiled.

"Good choice," Alexis lifted an arm to allow Maggie to snuggle into her good side and started reading.

-d-d-d-d-d-

No conflict just some smooshy moments. :) Tell me something good.


	41. Chapter 25

This one is for oldmoviewatcher who asked for some time with Sarah Grace's side of things.

-d-d-d-d-d-

"Hey, Gwennie," Kevin kissed his sister's cheek in greeting before taking a seat in the booth across from her.

"Hey, Kevie," she smiled at him, "Has life finally settled down for you?"

"A bit," he nodded, "How are things with you and the kids?"

"They're good," Gwen nodded.

"And Frank?"

"We're fine, Kevin," Gwen gave him a reassuring smile while pouring him a cup of coffee from the carafe left by the waitress at her request. "How about you give me the truth about everything?"

"What truth is that?" he looked towards the table nervously. He could never get anything past his sister. He didn't know why he was trying now.

"How about we start with your wife getting arrested for planning a murder for hire," Gwen gave him a look.

"Eight years ago, I had an affair. Jenny found out and threatened to take Sarah Grace if my mistress didn't end things," Kevin began after taking a sip from his coffee mug.

"I knew it," Gwen shook her head.

"Excuse me," Kevin stared at her.

"You were so happy for a while, and then it was like the life went out of you or something," Gwen said.

"You knew I had an affair and never said anything?" Kevin raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't know for sure," Gwen shook her head. "I had an inkling and really what was I going to say? Kev, are you sleeping with someone besides Jenny?"

"Her name is Alexis," Kevin stated, "She left the city for eight years, but returned several months ago after her husband was killed in an explosion."

"Alexis?" Gwen frowned in recognition of the name. The name of Jenny's victim had been kept out of the paper, so she'd had no idea who Jenny had targeted and why. The pieces were all coming into place. "Are you talking about Alexis Castle?"

"Uh, yeah," he nodded.

"How old was she?"

"Gwen, everything we did was legal," Kevin assured her, "She was twenty-two."

"Oh, thank God," Gwen sighed. "So, she's back now? Anything going on there?"

"We were getting there," he nodded, "It's slow going though because of the way her husband died."

"How did that happen?"

"He was a federal agent investigating a case and ended up in an explosion with Alexis right outside," he explained.

"Oh my God," Gwen breathed. "That's horrible."

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"Kev," Gwen caught his eye. "What else?"

"Isn't that enough?" he asked.

"What aren't you telling me about you and Alexis?" she pressed.

Kevin took his phone out and flipped to a recently taken picture before he showed it to Gwen.

"Kevin, oh my god, he has your eyes," Gwen gasped, "Is he..."

"His name is Hunter, and he's eight," Kevin said quietly. "Yeah, he's mine."

"Oh my god," Gwen handed the phone back to her brother, "How long have you known?"

"Figured it out about five minutes before Alexis's husband died," Kevin admitted.

"Why didn't she-oh," Gwen suddenly put it together.

"She didn't know when she left that she was pregnant. When she found out, she knew what would happen if she told me. She didn't want me to lose Sarah Grace."

"God, Kevin," Gwen took her brother's hand in hers. "You must be going through hell right now."

"Yeah, it hasn't exactly been a picnic as of late," Kevin confirmed.

"Why didn't you ever come to any of us?" Gwen asked.

"I didn't want you thinking any less of me," he frowned.

"Right, because you're the good one," Gwen smirked. "C'mon Kevin, none of us are perfect, no matter what Mom used to tell us."

"What I did went against everything that we've ever been taught about life and marriage. I blew it big time and a lot of people got hurt as a result including my wife, my daughter, and the woman I love," Kevin explained.

"You fell for someone else, Kevin," Gwen shook her head. "We're not going to disown you."

"Maybe you should," he looked at his ringless hand with a frown.

"Kevin, you made some mistakes," Gwen reached for his hand, "It's okay to admit that. You're my brother, and I will always support you."

"Thanks, Gwennie," Kevin smiled. "I should be thanking you."

"For what?" she inquired.

"First night I started talking to Alexis was the night I took Frank home."

"So you think I had some hand in you and Alexis hooking up?"

"No, that's not what I mean," he assured her.

"Kevin, I'm teasing," Gwen said. "I meant what I said before. You were so happy for a while and then suddenly, the light went out of your eyes."

"It was hard to find much to be happy about after Alexis left. Sarah Grace was really my only ray of light for a long while," he confessed.

"I'm sorry I didn't ask you what was wrong sooner," Gwen frowned, "You're my little brother. I'm supposed to be looking out for you."

"I probably would've said it was nothing and then when you pushed, told you to mind your own business."

"Maybe, but it's still my job to ask," Gwen replied, "I was too caught up in my own drama to notice yours. You were always there to pick me up. I should have returned the favor."

"Don't worry about it, Gwennie," Kevin shook his head. "You have your own life. I don't fault you that. I also don't fault you for being happy. I'm glad you and Frank are okay now."

"Yeah, me too," she replied, "I hope you and Alexis figure things out...that is if that's still in the cards after everything that has happened."

"She still loves me, and I love her," Kevin smiled. "After everything we still love each other."

"That's a good start," Gwen smiled.

"I think we're both getting close to the point where we're both ready to try again," he stated, "We just need to make sure that the kids are okay with it first."

"How is Sarah Grace?"

"She's adjusting, slowly," Kevin replied, "It sinks in more and more each day what her mom did."

"Does she know everything that happened?" Gwen asked.

"Not yet," he shook his head.

"Do you want me to help you tell her?"

"No, I'm gonna have Mom help me once I tell her everything."

"You haven't told her yet?"

"Still trying to find the right time."

"She's going to be on your side, you know that, right?"

"I'm not so sure," Kevin admitted.

"Kevin, she might be mad, but at the end of the day, she loves and will support you."

"I spent the weekend in the Hamptons with Alexis and everyone else," Kevin said. "I caught myself watching Hunter and thinking how much I wish Dad could've seen him."

"He's watching now," she replied, "I'm sure he's very proud that his son had a son of his own."

"I think he kind of knew about me and Lex," Kevin admitted.

"Knew how?" she asked.

"He would comment about my smiling more and then comment about Jenny's constant frowning," Kevin said.

"He wanted what we all do for you," Gwen replied, "He wanted you to be happy."

"I'm working on it," Kevin nodded.

"I'd like to meet her," Gwen said, "And Hunter."

"In time," Kevin replied, "She's still healing, and we need to tell Hunter who his real father is before we do anything else. Please be patient with me, Gwennie."

"Always," Gwen smiled. "Just to let you know, I'm on your side."

"I know," he nodded, "Thanks, Sis."

"No problem," Gwen smiled. "Let's eat, huh?"

"Yeah, I'm starving," he looked at the menu for the first time.

"Good," Gwen looked at her own menu.

-f-f-f-f-

"Kevin, stop pacing," Bridget advised her son.

"I don't even know where to start," Kevin continued circling the living room.

"Start with the truth," Bridget told him. "Sarah Grace is a smart girl."

Kevin took a deep breath as he heard the rustling of a key in the door lock.

"Hey, Pumpkin," Kevin greeted her.

"Hi, Dad. Hi, Grandma," Sarah Grace greeted them. "Dad, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"I...ah...I needed to talk to you," Kevin stammered out his explanation.

"Is Mom okay?"

"As far as I know, yes," Kevin nodded.

"Okay," Sarah Grace nodded. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Kevin nodded again. "It's not a matter of being okay or not. I have something to tell you."

Sarah Grace took a deep breath. It had been a year full of heartache. She didn't know if she could take more bad news.

"There's a reason I asked your mom for a divorce," Kevin started.

"Yeah, you told me," Sarah Grace, "You weren't happy. We've already talked about this."

"I know," Kevin sat down. "But there's more that I didn't tell you."

Sarah Grace quickly took a seat and braced herself for the news.

"I don't love your mom anymore. I'm in love with someone else. I have been for a long time."

"Oh," Sarah Grace stated in surprise, "Did you...cheat on Mom?"

"Yes, I did," Kevin nodded.

Sarah Grace release a gasp, "When?"

"A little over eight years ago," Kevin admitted. He paused for several moments to gather his thoughts. "Sarah Grace, there's something else."

"Eight years," Sarah Grace swallowed hard, trying desperately to keep the tears from flowing.

"You were very young when it happened," Kevin nodded. "I'm so sorry, Pumpkin."

"So, what else is there?" Sarah Grace wiped at a tear.

"You have a brother," Kevin said quietly.

Sarah Grace choked on a sob.

Bridget crossed the room and went to hug her granddaughter. "It's okay, Sweetie."

"No, it's not," Sarah Grace shook her head. "Who is it, Daddy?"

"It's Hunter LaSalle," Kevin replied.

"Hunter?" Sarah Grace looked horrified. "But that means you were with his mom."

"Yes, it does," Kevin nodded.

"But Dad, how-" Sarah Grace shook her head and then ran to her room. They heard the slamming of the door.

"Kevin?" Bridget looked at her son.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, Mom."

"Do I look surprised?"

"No, you don't," Kevin looked to his mother in confusion. She'd taken the news of his affair quite well when he'd told her earlier. "How do you know?"

"That's something you should ask Alexis," his mother responded crytically.

"What am I going to do about Sarah Grace? She hates me now."

"Sweetie, give her time. She's had a lot of changes recently," Bridget patted her son's hand.

"This is all my fault," he turned away, "I messed up so much. I lost eight years with my son, with Alexis, and now I'm losing my daughter."

"You're not losing her," Bridget shook her head. "She's upset. She's got your temper."

"I can't lose her, Mom," he replied.

"You won't. She'll cool down."

"I'm so afraid that because I went about this entire thing the wrong way the first time that it's never going to work out," Kevin shook his head.

Bridget turned her son's face to hers, "You made your mistakes. We all have, but you have another chance now. Do things the way you should've."

"I want to marry Alexis," Kevin admitted.

"I'm sure you do," her mother nodded, "But to do this the right way, you have to make Sarah Grace okay with it first."

"I know. Mom, there's something I want to show you," Kevin went to his room and grabbed his phone to show his mother a picture of his son. He went back to the living room while flipping through the pictures, "Here."

"What's this?" she asked before looking at the phone.

"This is Hunter," Kevin replied, "Your grandson."

"He's a handsome little man," Bridget smiled proudly, pushing away a tear that threatened to flow, "How could she do it, Kevin? How could she keep your son from you for so many years?"

"Mom, don't be mad at her for what she did. She had her reasons."

"And they'd better be good," Bridget responded.

"Jenny threatened to take Sarah Grace and disappear if Alexis didn't leave," Kevin explained, "Alexis knew if Jenny found out that she was pregnant with my child that she would disappear with my daughter, and with what Jenny did after Alexis returned to New York, I can't help but think what might have happened to Hunter if she'd stayed."

"Oh my God," Bridget gasped. "How could Jenny do something like that?"

"I don't know."

"That poor girl," Bridget shook her head.

"Good enough reason?" Kevin asked.

"More than good enough," Bridget nodded. "What's he like?"

"He's an amazing little boy," Kevin smiled while glanced over his mother's shoulder to take in the picture.

"Look at him," Bridget smiled. "He's got your eyes."

"It's the first thing I noticed about him."

"But that hair is definitely his mother's," Bridget commented. "They were living in New Orleans, right?"

"Yeah. He's got a little twang to his voice. He's so smart. Alexis said he was the smartest in his class in New Orleans. She's hoping he'll get a scholarship to an elite private school here in the city."

Bridget smiled, "What does he want to be when grows up?"

"A cop," Kevin admitted.

"Like his father," Bridget's smile widened.

"Both of his fathers," Kevin nodded.

"When can I meet him?" she asked.

"I'll talk to Lex."

"The sooner the better," she replied.

"I'll ask," he replied, "We haven't told Hunter yet, and I expect him to react about as well as Sarah Grace. It's going to take him awhile to come around too."

"Give him some time. Remember to practice some of that patience that the nuns tried to instill in you," Bridget smiled.

"Yeah, still working on that."

"But Alexis did a good job?" Bridget flipped through some of the other pictures.

"Yeah, she did a great job. He's a good kid."

"I know you're his father, but remember that Chris was too," Bridget advised. "And the way he lost him..."

"I know, Ma."

"Good," she replied.

"Thanks for being so great about this."

"Even if I can't meet Hunter right away, I would like the opportunity to talk to Alexis," Bridget added.

"Just promise me you won't attack her," Kevin asked.

"I would never," she gasped at the thought.

"Okay, I had to make sure," Kevin smiled. "It hasn't been easy to adjust to everything since she came home."

Bridget gave a wide smile. After the horribleness of the past few months...years actually, her son finally seemed happy.

"I'll set something up," Kevin promised. "Gwen wants to meet her too."

"I'm sure she does."

"She wasn't surprised when I told her what happened. She was more than a little surprised when I told her what Jenny tried to do."

"We're all a bit in shock about that."

"I'll set something up with Lex. Maybe we can have dinner."

"I'd like that." Bridget hugged her son.

"So would I," Kevin agreed. "Should I try to talk to Sarah Grace now or wait a while longer?"

"Try again," Bridget nudged him.

Kevin nodded and went to where his daughter was currently sleeping. It'd been one of his sisters' rooms when they were kids.

"Sarah Grace," Kevin knocked on the door before pushing it open.

"Go away," Sarah Grace turned onto her side away from him.

"I'm your father, so I can't," Kevin sat on the end of her bed.

"What do you want?"

"I know you're mad, Pumpkin," he nudged her gently, "I know that you blame me for a lot that has gone wrong lately. I made a few mistakes, but I'm trying to fix them."

"Is he really my brother?"

"Yes," Kevin nodded.

"It's not some trick?" Sarah Grace added.

"No. Look at me," Kevin nudged her again. He waited until she rolled onto her other side and was looking at him. "I've known Alexis for a long time. When things with me and your mom started to go bad, I had a lot of people telling me to suck it up and deal with it. Alexis just listened...I tried to make it work with your mom. You have no idea how hard I tried, but we just never clicked the way that I did with Lex."

"Didn't you love Mom?" Sarah Grace sniffled.

"I loved your mom," Kevin nodded. "I wouldn't have married her if I hadn't. You came from that love. I'll be grateful for that for the rest of my life. Some loves just don't last, Pumpkin. It's hard to admit and it hurts like you wouldn't believe when it happens. I fell in love with someone else. It's no one's fault. I know it doesn't make a lot of sense to you, but it happens."

"It sucks," Sarah Grace frowned.

"It can," Kevin nodded. "But it can also give a person hope."

"Are you going to marry her, Daddy?"

"I want to," Kevin replied, "But I want you to be okay with it first."

Sarah Grace frowned again as she considered her dad's words, "She's nice."

"She's very nice," Kevin nodded.

"I'm not ready to be okay with it," Sarah Grace admitted.

"I know," Kevin nodded. "We're going to wait until you are. You know Alexis cares a lot about you, right?"

"Yeah," her head bobbed slightly.

"She cares very much about you and me being together," he added, "She left New York so that you and I could be together."

"What?" Sarah Grace looked confused.

"Your mom found out about me and Alexis before I had the chance to tell her I wanted a divorce."

"So," Sarah Grace replied.

"It's complicated," Kevin took a deep breath. "Your mom obviously wasn't happy about my affair, and she told Alexis that if our relationship didn't end that she was going to take you somewhere where I could never see you again."

"What?" Sarah Grace's eyes widened.

"Alexis took her warning seriously," Kevin explained. "She left New York so I wouldn't lose you."

"Mom wouldn't have taken me away," Sarah Grace shook her head.

"I want to believe that too," Kevin took his daughter's hand, "We'll never know what would have happened. Alexis wasn't willing to risk the chance. That's how much she cared about you…and me."

Sarah Grace looked conflicted. She wanted to believe the best about her mother, but she wasn't a fool. Jenny was in jail because she was accused of trying to have Alexis killed. "I want to see Mom."

"Are you sure? She's not in a good place, Sarah Grace."

"I want to see her," Sarah Grace repeated, "I'll have Grandma take me if you won't."

"I'll take you," Kevin nodded. "It will take a few days to set up."

"Thank you."

"I love you, Pumpkin," he squeezed her hand, "You are the most important person in my life. I hope you know that."

"I do," Sarah Grace nodded. "Daddy? Hunter's nice."

"Yes, he is," Kevin felt a lump forming, "All of Alexis's children are, and I know you like spending time with them."

The little blonde nodded, "If you marry Alexis, where are we going to live?"

"We'd have to work on that," Kevin replied, "Alexis's home is big enough for her and her children, but you might not be comfortable sharing a room. If we got married, we'd probably want to find a new place."

"Have you talked to Mom's parents?" Sarah Grace asked.

"No, but I know they called you. It's okay to talk to them."

"Good."

"Why don't we take your grandma to dinner? I think we could all use a little relaxation tonight."

"Can we have pizza?"

"We can have anything you'd like," he smiled.

"Ice cream too?"

"Sure," Kevin nodded as the two went to collect Bridget.

-d-d-d-

" _Hello?"_

"Hey, it's me," Kevin smiled.

" _Hey, Detective,"_ Alexis smiled into the phone, _"How'd it go with your mom and Sarah Grace?"_

"Mom took it alright," Kevin said. "Sarah Grace is gonna take some time. I had to tell her a lot of things I was hoping I wouldn't have to for a while."

" _She's a smart girl,"_ Alexis replied, _"She's going to need details."_

"Yeah, I know," Kevin looked out the window, seeing the neighborhood he'd grown up in. "I had a thought, and I want your opinion."

" _Don't keep me in suspense,"_ she prompted him.

"What would you say to a family outing?" he asked quietly.

" _You don't need my permission for that," she replied, "If you and Sarah Grace want to go out together, I'm all for it."_

"I mean your family and my family all out together," he clarified.

" _Like we did for that dinner before I was stabbed?"_ Alexis asked.

"Yes," Kevin nodded. "I know it's sudden-"

" _Where and when?"_

"I was thinking a baseball game," he replied, "It's a subway series this weekend. A buddy of mine in Narcotics had a bunch of tickets but can't go. He offered them to me. Coincidentally, there's enough for all of us."

" _What a coincidence,"_ Alexis smiled. _"That'd be great. The boys are Yankee fans you know."_

"Really?"

" _Oh yes,"_ Alexis nodded. _"This was despite Chris."_

"Who did he root for?"

" _Braves,"_ Alexis smiled. _"But he was more into football that baseball."_

"Let me guess, he's a Saints fan."

" _Very good,"_ Alexis smiled. _"He took us all to a game at the Superdome one year for Cade's birthday. I was six months pregnant with Maggie, Cade was two, and Hunter was about to be four."_

"How'd they do with all the noise?" Kevin asked, "That place gets really loud, doesn't it?"

" _They were okay. I was jumpy. Maggie kicked the whole time."_

"A cheerleader from the womb," Kevin chuckled.

" _Did I ever tell you I almost became a cheerleader?"_

"No," Kevin snorted, "Do you still have the outfit?"

" _No,"_ Alexis giggled.

"That's too bad," he replied, "I bet you looked very cute in that outfit."

Alexis blushed and was very glad they weren't face to face.

"Do you think they'll all be okay with us seeing each other?" he asked.

" _I hope so,"_ Alexis smiled, _"Because I'm not going to stop seeing you."_

"That would require that you start seeing me," he pointed out.

" _Let's have lunch tomorrow then,"_ Alexis smiled.

"Hey, Lex, Sarah Grace asked me about something and I didn't really know how to answer her."

" _Did you want to borrow my anatomy book?"_

"Ha, ha," he rolled his eyes, "It's something that you and I haven't talked about yet."

" _Kev, we don't need to talk about the birds and bees,"_ Alexis teased, _"I think you and I figured things out just fine."_

"No," Kevin shook his head. "She asked me about living arrangements if you and I get married."

" _Oh, yeah, I guess that is something that would need to be worked out,"_ she agreed.

"It's just that Sarah Grace is an only child…was an only child, and she's not used to sharing a space with another period. I couldn't in good conscience ask her to share a room with your daughter, and your place doesn't really have an open bedroom for her."

" _Kev, slow down,"_ Alexis laughed a little. _"I wouldn't want Sarah Grace sharing a room with Maggie either. Besides Sarah Grace spending the last ten years as an only child, Maggie's the only girl and a bit of a princess. I'm sure this hasn't escaped your attention."_

"No, it hasn't," he conceded, "So what are your thoughts on this?"

" _Well, I told you my first choice was a place with an actual neighborhood like you grew up with and like I had in New Orleans. I only took this place because Dad made it a gift. I'd be more than happy with a place in Brooklyn near your mom or on Long Island, if you wanted."_

"You'd be willing to move?" he was completely dumbfounded by her reply.

" _Yes, I would,"_ Alexis smiled on her end. _"Don't sound so surprised. I want a future with you, Kevin. That means you, me, and every last one of our kids."_

"Any more kids in that future?"

" _You want more?"_ Alexis sounded surprised.

"I don't know," he admitted, "I didn't with Jenny, for obvious reasons, but with you...maybe?"

" _Are you wanting the entire Brady Bunch, Detective?"_ she teased him.

"We'd need two more for that to happen," he smiled. "Though, I'm the one with a girl who has hair of gold."

" _And I've got the boys and a little redhead,"_ Alexis giggled.

"I guess we have some talking and thinking to do," Kevin replied.

" _Yeah, we do,"_ Alexis smiled. _"Can I buy you lunch tomorrow?"_

"Isn't it my turn to buy yet?"

" _If you want to buy, that's fine."_

"Good. I want to buy you lunch."

" _Then I'll see you tomorrow,"_ she replied, _"Night, Kevin. Sweet dreams."_

"Night, Lex. Sleep well."


	42. Chapter 26

Kevin pushed the button for Alexis's floor after he and Sarah Grace got on the elevator. As the doors slid closed he looked at his daughter with a smile, "You okay Sweetheart?"

"Yeah," she nodded slightly, "I promised I'd be on my best behavior."

"I appreciate that," Kevin nodded. "I know you're not happy about any of this."

"No, I'm not," she confirmed.

"But I need you to not take it out on anyone else. If you're mad at me, take it out on me."

"I won't, Daddy," she looked into his eyes, "I promise I won't."

"And you know that Hunter doesn't know about any of this yet, right?"

"Yes," she moaned, "Didn't we already talk about this?"

"Yes, we did," Kevin nodded. "I'm sorry, Sweetheart. I know you've been through a lot, but so have Alexis and her family."

"I won't tell anyone. I promise," she reassured him.

"Thank you," he smiled as he hugged her before they walked down the hall to Alexis's apartment.

"Hey guys," Alexis smiled when she admitted Kevin and Sarah Grace. "You're early."

"Too early?" Kevin asked with a hand firmly on Sarah Grace's shoulder, "We can come back in a bit."

"Don't be silly," she wiped her hands on her dishrag. "Come in. Hi, Sarah Grace. How are you?"

"Okay," the ten year old said quietly.

"The boys and Maggie are in the game room," Alexis pointed to the stairs.

Sarah Grace looked nervously towards her father before receiving his encouragement to join the other kids.

"Place looks good," Kevin looked around since he hadn't been inside her place after he'd helped her move in.

"It came together pretty well," Alexis nodded. "I still wish I'd found something in Queens, Long Island or Brooklyn."

"Why'd you settle for here then?"

"My dad," Alexis motioned him to follow her into the kitchen. "He made this place a gift, so I couldn't turn it down."

"Yeah, Castle's not good with no, is he?"

"Never has been," she laughed before turning serious, "Is Sarah Grace doing okay?"

"We've been having a lot of long talks. She knows her mother did something bad and that I'm not innocent in everything either," Kevin admitted. "My mom's been a lot of help, but Jenny's parents are not taking things well. They came to the house the other day, and we got into a loud fight."

"What about?" Alexis asked, "Or do I even have to guess."

"I won't help Jenny," Kevin admitted. "I told her lawyer I will not be in the courtroom during any part of anything unless called to testify."

"Considering what Jenny is accused of, can they really blame you?"

"They think that I caused this, and that I should do what I can to help the court go easy on her."

Alexis reached across the counter and took his hand, "What do you think?"

"I think she tried to kill someone that I care deeply about. I cannot fathom sitting in a courtroom and offering my support to the woman responsible," Kevin brushed his thumb along her fingers.

"What about Sarah Grace?" Alexis asked, "What does she want?"

"She wants to see Jenny, but I don't know if I should let her."

"Jenny's going away for what will probably be a good part of Sarah Grace's life, if not all of it," Alexis said. "You are going to have to figure out a way to give them a relationship."

"It's hard to get past my anger right now," he sighed.

"I know, but you're a parent. You know what that means," Alexis smiled. "You put aside how you feel for your child."

"I hate that Jenny has put our family…put our daughter this position," he replied, "It's tearing our daughter up, feeling like she has to pick sides."

"I know, and I'm always on your side, okay?"

"I need to be on Sarah Grace's side," Kevin replied.

"I think you know what you need to do," Alexis tilted her head.

"Let Sarah Grace be the one to decide what she wants and support her."

"Exactly," Alexis looked at the staircase and listened for a moment for any sounds the kids could be around before she leaned forward kissed Kevin lightly. "Hi."

"Hi," he smiled, "Something smells delicious."

"It's lasagna. There's also an appetizer called a Chicken Salad Crescent Ring. Kate's bringing dessert and Lanie's bringing alcohol."

"Since when are you the gourmet chef?" he inquired.

"The ring is ridiculously easy," Alexis smiled. "And lasagna isn't all that hard. I had to learn how to cook at some point, right?"

"I'm gonna have to give that a try myself."

"You make great pancakes," Alexis smiled.

"That's about all I have in my arsenal at the moment," he frowned, "Those are going to get old quick."

"You could take cooking classes or ask your mom for lessons," Alexis suggested as she got out some glasses. "Wine or beer?"

"Just water for me tonight," Kevin shook off the offer, "I want to get back to our place in one piece."

"Okay," Alexis took a bottle of water from the fridge and gave it to him.

"Thanks," he took the bottle. "Do you need any help?"

"No, do you want a lay of the land before everyone else gets here?"

"Sure," he replied, "Where do I buy the tour tickets?"

"Funny. Come on, I'll show you some of the selling points this place has to offer," Alexis came around the counter and took his hand.

Kevin followed along. The last stop was the game room where the children were playing a board game. It was the most animated Alexis had ever seen Sarah Grace.

"That doubles as a poker table," Alexis said. "Dad wants to break it in tonight."

"I brought a wallet full of cash," Kevin confirmed, "But I'm expecting to leave with much more."

"I just have to remind my dad if he loses the loft, he cannot move in here," Alexis smiled.

"He's certainly not moving in with me and Sarah Grace," Kevin laughed, "Mother would not be happy."

 _"Hello?"_

"Speak of the devil," Alexis said. "Be right down!"

She heard her father and stepmother making themselves right at home as her siblings came storming up the stairs to join the rest of the kids.

In their rush, they knocked Alexis off balance. Kevin's quick reflexes caught her before she tumbled to the floor.

"Thanks," Alexis said as she straightened up.

"Mommy, your cheeks are pink," Maggie told her mother, "Are you hot?"

"Yes, Sweetie," Alexis smiled. "We need to go down and open some windows."

"Okay, I'll help," Maggie grabbed her mother's hand and pulled her down the stairs.

"Thanks, Mags," Alexis smiled. "But why don't you stay with the kids and play? I think I saw Jo getting out Chutes and Ladders."

Maggie stopped halfway down the stairs to give her mother's comment a thought before turning back up the stairs to join the rest of the children.

"Never fails," Alexis murmured as she walked the rest of the way down and greeted her father. "Hey, Dad."

"Hello, Daughter," he kissed her cheek.

"Hey, Kate," Alexis said to the brunette in the kitchen.

"Hey, Bud, your timer dinged, so I took out what was in the oven."

"Oh good," she replied, "I'd hate for the lasagna to be overcooked."

"No problem. I put in the cookie sheet you had on the stove," Kate added.

"Great," Alexis set the timer. "That's the appetizer."

"Hope it doesn't take too long. I'm starving," Rick stated as he shook Kevin's hand in greeting.

"Do you want something to drink while we wait?"

"Beer for me," Rick replied, "Kate drew the short straw and is the D.D. tonight."

"Kate, soda, water," Alexis got a beer for her dad.

"Water works," Kate stated. "How are you doing with your recovery, Alexis? Ready to go back to work?"

"Yes," Alexis groaned as she handed a bottle of water to her step-mother. "I am so freaking bored. I have read all of my medical journals about twenty times."

"Learn anything new?" Castle asked.

"No," Alexis shook her head as they moved into the living room. "The only journals I kept had articles I liked, so I've read them before."

"Speaking of medical journals, I finally read that article you gave me a few months ago. Dr. Mallard is a genius," Kate commented as she sat down on the couch.

"Isn't he though," Alexis smiled, "He's my idol."

"What's a Dr. Mallard?" Kevin asked as he took a seat in an armchair and Alexis sat on the arm her legs on the inside, toes resting against Kevin's leg and his hand resting casually around her ankle.

"He was the M.E. at the Navy Yard in Virginia. He retired about three years ago, but he still writes the occasional article."

"How's his assistant?" Castle asked. "What was his name?"

"Jimmy," Alexis nodded. "As far as I know he's okay. I haven't talked to him since the last time I was in D.C. for a lecture."

"I can't believe you remember him, Castle," Kate smiled.

"How could he forget him?" Alexis giggled. "Jimmy fell all over himself telling Dad what fans he and his wife were. I thought Jimmy was going to pass out when I introduced them."

"You're kidding," Kevin laughed.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "Apparently Jimmy has every book Dad ever wrote."

"What did he say?" Kate furrowed her brow in concentration. "It was nice to meet someone who hadn't used him in a book."

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "That was a shot at one of his colleagues. Apparently the guy used all of his co-workers in a book he wrote. I think it was named Deep Six."

"I read that," Kevin said. "It was pretty good."

"Thom E. Gemcity? I've met him," Rick commented.

"Really," Kevin replied, "Is he as clever in person as he is in his books?"

"He's a bit of a computer geek," Alexis commented.

"How would you know?" Kevin looked at her.

"Because in addition to being an author, he's also an NCIS agent."

"Talk about pulling double duty. How does he find the time to do both?"

"Little sleep and lots of coffee," Castle commented.

Alexis laughed, "Same way Chris and I raised three kids. At least the commute was short for the first year."

"How's that?" Kevin asked.

"For the first year we were married, we lived in an apartment across the courtyard from the NCIS office."

"Sounds convenient," Kevin replied, "Wish I could afford to live across from the precinct."

"It was convenient. When I wanted to get Hunter to sleep, I'd take him out and walk him around. I spent a lot of nights walking that courtyard. I could tell you where every loose stone was after a while."

"When are Javi and Lanie due to arrive?" Rick quickly polished off his beer, "I could do with a stiff drink."

"Soon, I hope," Alexis checked her watch and smiled as she felt Kevin's hand absently rub her calf. "So, I figure after dinner, we'll set up poker upstairs, and I'll put a movie in down here for the kids."

"Hope you brought your bankcard, Kevin," Rick wrapped his arm around his wife's shoulders, "I'm feeling mighty lucky tonight. I foresee a few trips to the ATM in your future."

"I don't know about that. I'm feeling kinda lucky myself," Kevin smiled as he leaned back and looked at Alexis.

"Just don't lose the loft, Dad. There's not enough room for you, Kate, and the kids to move in here."

"Don't worry about that," Rick snorted, "I'd move into your grandmother's studio first."

 _Ding-dong_

"That's probably Lanie and Javi."

 _DING!_

"And that's the appetizer," Kate said. "I'll get the door while you get the food."

"Thanks," Alexis swiveled off her perch.

"Perfect timing," Lanie proclaimed while watching Alexis pull the appetizer out of the oven. "I was just telling Javi that I was very hungry."

"Join the club," Rick got up to greet his friends. "Smells great, Alexis."

"If it tastes as good as it smells, Lex, I'm going to want the recipe," Lanie waited anxiously for Alexis to cut into it.

"Pillsbury website," Alexis giggled as she sliced it. "Someone grab some plates."

Kate pulled plates out of the cabinet and helped herself to a piece.

"Dad, call the kids down, I'm sure they're hungry."

Rick bellowed out an invite to the children without leaving his seat.

"Thanks, Dad," Alexis rolled her eyes at him, "I could have done that all on my own."

"Then why didn't you?" Rick smirked.

"Eat your food, Castle," Kate handed him a plate.

The children came thundering down the stairs, snatching up as many pieces as their parents would let them.

"Don't eat too much. We've still got lasagna to eat," Alexis warned them as they took plates and went back upstairs.

With nearly every morsel claimed, Alexis had the thought that next time she would make two batches of their appetizer, so she'd get a piece for herself.

"Here," Kevin handed her a piece. "I know how Javi eats."

"Thanks," Alexis smiled.

"What's that supposed to mean, Ryan?" Javier glared at his partner as he took a rather large bite.

"Nothing, Javi," Kevin smiled. "You ready to lose some money tonight?"

"Yep, I always am," Javier grinned with pride.

"God, I can remember hearing my dad play poker with you guys," Alexis smiled and then frowned sadly, "And Montgomery."

"I remember the first time I played cards with Martha," Kate smiled. "She wasn't a fan of Texas Hold 'Em. She liked strip poker."

"Because even when you lost you won," Kevin laughed.

"I don't know about that," Rick winced at the thought of playing strip poker with his mother.

"Hey, how come I never got invited to these games?" Lanie asked.

"Because you don't like playing Texas Hold 'Em either," Javi reminded her. "You're in the same mindset as Mrs. R was."

"You made the invite list tonight, Darling," Rick winked at her.

"Just a warning, we are playing Texas Hold 'Em," Alexis told Rick as she handed him some plates. "Set the table, please."

"Yes, ma'am," Rick saluted his daughter before accepting his task.

"We trained him well," Kate smiled.

"We had help," Alexis laughed as she pulled the salad bowl from the fridge to go with their lasagna.

"You need me to do anything, Sweetie?" Lanie asked.

Alexis looked over her shoulder and laughed, "Clean Espo up."

"What's that mean?" Javier looked to her in confusion.

"You have avocado on your chin, Partner," Kevin laughed.

Lanie grabbed a napkin and wiped her lover's chin.

"Could you put this on the table?" Alexis handed the salad bowl to Kevin.

Kevin did as asked.

"How's he doing?" Lanie asked Alexis and Javier.

"Okay, I think," Alexis said. "We've had dinner and coffee a few times this week. He's having some trouble with Jenny's parents."

"Some? Her father's been calling every two hours for the last three days," Javier shook his head.

"What's he want?" Lanie asked.

"He-" Alexis and Javier started at the same time. They both stopped and smiled before Alexis motioned for Javier to continue.

"He wants Kevin to support his estranged wife," Javier replied, "Kevin wants no part of it."

"And Jenny's parents wants visitation with Sarah Grace," Kate said quietly. "Kevin's not sure it's a good idea."

"Tough situation all the way around," Lanie sighed.

"Yeah, it is," Alexis said quietly.

"None of this is your fault," Kate said.

"Nights like this help," Javier chimed in, "Gives him time to escape it all."

"Then let's go have some fun," Alexis grabbed the lasagna while Kate took the wine and followed their friends into the dining room. The kids were already sitting down, having been quietly collected by Kevin. "Kate, I didn't even ask. What's dessert?"

"Cheesecake," Kate smiled, "Martha's recipe."

"Yum," Alexis smiled as she sat down next to Kevin. "Gram was not the best cook, but she was good at dessert."

"I always thought she bought her famous cheesecakes," Rick snorted, "Guess I've been proven wrong."

"Ye of little faith," Kate smiled.

"I know. For the kids, we have ice cream and hot fudge," Castle smiled.

"Kids don't always have the appreciation for cheesecake that adults do," Kate added.

Maggie squealed with delight at the prospect of having ice cream. She had such a sweet tooth, just like her father.

"You have to eat your dinner first," Alexis warned.

Maggie's delight turned to disappointment as a frown covered her face.

"You'll like it, Sweetie," Alexis assured her.

"It's good, Maggie Mae," Rick backed up Alexis. "I promise. Do you think I'd let your mother serve you something yucky?"

"No," the young girl shook her head from side to side quickly.

"So, eat up," Rick encouraged. "Jamie, Ian, that goes for you guys too."

"And you, Jo," Kate told her daughter.

Jo wasn't nearly as tentative with her eating habits as Maggie and dove right in, proclaiming it to be 'super yummy'.

"Thanks, Jo," Alexis smiled before she looked at her own boys. Hunter was digging right in. The eight year old would eat anything as long as it wasn't moving. Alexis was convinced it was a byproduct of living with her and Christopher's dubious cooking skills. Cade on the other hand… "Cade, don't just eat the cheese."

"But that's the part I like," he frowned.

"Yes, but you also like meat and noodles, remember?"

"I do," he looked to her with intrigue.

"Yes, you do," she confirmed, "Now eat up."

Kevin smiled and looked at his daughter, "What's the matter, Sweetie? You like lasagna."

"It's different than Mom's," Sarah Grace picked it apart.

The table got quiet for a moment and Kevin nodded, "Yeah, it is, but it's still good. Give it a try?"

"It's yummy, Sarah," Maggie chimed in, having eaten nearly half of it already.

"It really is," Hunter spoke up.

Sarah Grace couldn't help being self-conscious as it felt like all eyes were on her as she took a small bite.

"Lanie, can you pass the iced tea?" Alexis looked for a way to break up the tension.

"Sure, Honey," Lanie passed it over and kicked Javier.

He glared, and she mouthed, "Talk!"

"So, Alexis, when do you go back to work?"

"As soon as humanly possible," Alexis sighed.

"You still have another week of mandatory leave," Lanie told the redhead.

"I'm bored," Alexis whined. "The kids are at camp most of the day, my house is spotless, my office is unpacked and organized, and if I watch anymore daytime TV, I'm going to be declared legally brain dead."

" _Temptation Lane_ not doing it for you?" Rick asked his daughter.

"I can't watch that show," Alexis shook her head.

"Why not?" Kate asked, a bit disturbed. She'd had a soft spot for the daytime soap since she was nine, watching it with her mom after having her tonsils out.

"That guy Gram dated is still on and every time I see him, I remember walking in on him and Gram on the couch about to you know…," Alexis shuddered.

"Yeah, that'd turn me off," Kevin made a face.

"I thought you were working on some kind of sur-Ow!" Rick said.

"I'm sorry, Honey," Kate smiled sweetly. "I guess I kicked you when I was rearranging my feet."

"What was that for?" Rick glared at his wife.

"To keep you quiet," she hissed quietly in his direction.

"I'm getting more wine. Anyone else," Alexis made a quick exit.

"I'll help you," Kevin followed her. When they were in the kitchen he asked Alexis, "What was that all about?"

"My dad doesn't know when to shut up," Alexis muttered.

"Everything alright?" he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You mean besides the prospect of losing my short term disability check to Javi?" she inquired.

"He's not as good as he thinks he is," Kevin assured her.

"I'm working on something for you," Alexis admitted.

"Like what?" he pressed a kiss to her shoulder as she worked on popping open a new bottle of wine.

"It's not a conversation we can have with a house full of people."

"Then let's kick everyone out," he chuckled.

"You free for lunch tomorrow?"

"I can be as long as we don't pull a hot case between now and then," he nodded.

"You want to meet up? I'll tell you then."

"You have yourself a date," he chuckled.

"Good," she nodded with a bit of a frown.

"What's wrong?"

"I just think you might be mad when you find out what I did."

"What did you do?" he asked.

"Something you'll either be touched by or really pissed off about."

"Lex?"

"Tomorrow, okay? Tonight let's go take my dad and Javi for their paychecks."

"Deal," he chuckled, "Want to know Javi's tell when he has a good hand?"

"Of course," she smiled.

"He rubs his earlobe," Kevin kissed the tip of her nose.

"Thank you," Alexis smiled.

"Let's go win back that short term disability check," Kevin chuckled, "You're going to need that money to pay bills."

Alexis grabbed the wine and went back into the dining room, "Where are the kids?"

"Cleaning up the game room," Kate smiled.

"Apparently someone encouraged a popcorn fight just before they came down for dinner," Rick looked a bit guilty. He'd obviously had a hand in starting it.

"I see. Did they decide on what movie to watch?"

"Something cartoonish," Rick replied, "They all seem to blend together after awhile."

"They cleaned their plates," Javier put in.

"How much did you help?" Kevin asked.

"Perhaps a bit," Javi admitted.

"Except for Hunter," Kate said. "That boy will eat anything."

"As long as it's not moving," Alexis agreed.

"He gets that from his grandfather," Kate snorted.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "Dubious cooking skills. I'm convinced of it."

"Let's get the table set up," Lanie suggested, "I'm looking to finance my next shopping trip."

"Thought you didn't like playing poker," Kevin looked to her in confusion.

"Feeling lucky tonight," Lanie replied.

"Why don't you and Javi help Lanie set up the table?" Kate looked to her husband. "I'll set up the movie, and Alexis and Kevin can clear the table."

"Sounds good," Rick nodded. "Bring liquor."

"Will do," Kevin nodded.

Alexis stacked plates as she and Kevin cleared the table.

"That's a nice picture of you and Martha," Kevin nodded to over Alexis's shoulder.

"Thanks," Alexis smiled as she took the plates into the kitchen, Kevin following with the silverware.

"She was a great lady," Kevin gave a sigh.

"Yeah, she was," Alexis opened the dishwasher. "How's your mom? I heard she had a scare last year."

"Good," Kevin responded, "Fortunately the biopsy came back negative."

"That's great. I, uh, I'm sorry about your dad," Alexis looked at Kevin. "Dad said it wasn't quick. It must've been hard to watch."

"It's never easy to lose a parent."

"No," Alexis shook her head. "I'm sorry I didn't reach out when it happened."

"It's okay," he took her hand for a moment, "I didn't expect to hear from you considering how abruptly you left."

"I knew what your dad meant to you," Alexis shook her head. "You said yourself that we were friends first. I should've called or something."

"It's okay," he repeated.

Alexis put her free hand on the side of his face and kissed him.

"We'd better get Castle his alcohol," Kevin smiled.

"Castle who?"

"Too tempting," he groaned when she pecked at his lips again.

"Oh God, I am so sorry," Lanie said from the doorway.

Alexis laughed and pulled away.

"So, I'm guessing I know who for the answer to that question I asked you the other day," Lanie smirked.

"What question?" Kevin eyed the girls.

"Lanie, take the wine," Alexis smiled.

"What question?" Kevin repeated.

Alexis turned to Kevin as Lanie left, "She asked me what the most public place I'd ever had sex was."

"And?"

"Gram's studio," Alexis revealed.

"Is that really the most public place," he raised a brow, "We should be able to do better than that."

"I don't think I'm ever going to be able to beat my dad and Gina," Alexis shuddered.

"Not sure I even want to know," Kevin winced.

"You sure? There's a police report," Alexis grabbed the cheesecake and a stack of plates. "Can you grab the cutting knife and forks?"

"Maybe I'll find it myself if I want to read it."

Alexis quickly made sure the kids were behaving before going upstairs with Kevin behind her.

"Okay, let's get started," Kate said. "Who's dealing first?"

"Castle," Javier and Kevin stated in unison.

"Go for it, Dad," Alexis took an empty seat and Kevin took the one next to her.

"What the maximum bet per hand?" Javier inquired as he flipped his chair around so he could straddle it.

"A dollar?" Alexis shrugged as she looked towards Kate and Lanie.

"Chicken," Javier snorted.

"Three kids and on leave," Alexis reminded the detective.

"Mandatory leave," Lanie interjected.

"Make it two," Javier challenged her.

"Fine," Alexis nodded.

"Alright, shall we then?" Rick began dealing.

-d-d-d-d-

"It's almost a shame to wake them," Alexis said to Kate when they observed the three men sound asleep in various positions on the sofa.

"Yeah, they look cute," Kate agreed.

"We have to. Their backs will kill them tomorrow if we don't," Lanie smiled. "How did this happen so fast anyway?"

"Dad had too much to drink, and Kevin's got a lot on his mind lately," Alexis said. "I don't know what Javi's excuse is."

"Someone keeps waking me up during the night," Javier mumbled from his spot on the sofa.

"Oh really," Alexis turned towards Lanie with an intrigued smile, "Holding out on me, Boss?"

"I have nothing to do with it," Lanie shook her head.

"Woman's a liar," Javier smirked.

Lanie hit him upside the head.

"One down, two to go," Alexis smirked.

"You take Kevin, I'll take your dad," Kate said.

"Would be kinda funny if you two reversed," Javier chuckled.

"Lanie, hit him again, will you?" Kate frowned.

Lanie grabbed a pillow and smacked him with it.

Alexis leaned over the couch and ran the backs of her fingers over Kevin's cheek, "Hey, time to come back to reality, Detective."

Kevin moaned slightly.

Kate tipped Rick's face to hers and kissed him.

The writer came out of his stupor and smiled against his wife's lips.

Alexis smiled at her dad and step-mom before looking back at Kevin. Oh well. When in Rome…

She kissed Kevin.

"There are some things a father just shouldn't see," Rick groaned as he rose from the sofa.

"Dad, I have three children. That train left the station years ago," Alexis giggled.

"There is the theory of grandchildren and then seeing it in practice," he stretched, "Keep that in mind for next time."

"You awake?" Alexis asked Kevin.

Kevin shook his head slowly from side to side.

"Sarah Grace and Maggie are asleep upstairs. I think we should let them sleep. I'll get you some blankets, and you can keep sleeping down here," Alexis suggested.

"Thank you," Kevin smiled.

"We'll let ourselves out," Kate said scooping Jo up while Castle took Jamie and Ian's hands.

The boys stumbled after their father.

"Thanks for having us," Lanie smiled. "One more week. Go to a spa or something one day."

"Good idea, Boss," Alexis walked them out.

"Dinner was great," Javier gave her a hug. "See you soon. Take care of my boy."

"Will do," Alexis replied, "Drive safe."

"We will," Javier nodded as he and Lanie followed Castle, Kate, and the kids.

Alexis locked the door behind them and turned off the lights. She walked back towards the living room, taking her hair out of its braid as she went. She stopped when she saw Kevin curled up on the sofa.

She reached for the blanket across the back of the sofa and laid it over him.

She gently ran her fingertips across his cheek and then started to pull away. Kevin's hand on her wrist stopped her.

"Go to sleep," Alexis smiled.

"Think we can get away with sharing the sofa," he spoke softly in his sleepy state.

Alexis bit her lip, "If there wasn't a chance that Sarah Grace would wake up and come looking for you, I'd say yes."

"I'll behave then," he frowned slightly, "Good night, Lex."

Alexis leaned down and kissed him again, this time her tongue coming into play.

"So much for behaving," Kevin pulled back in surprise for a moment before he attacked her lips with equal vigor.

Alexis giggled as she pulled back, "Okay, I know I started this, but we should go to sleep."

"Tease," he groaned and flopped back onto the sofa.

"Good things come to he who waits," Alexis reminded him. "Don't forget to set your alarm."

"I won't," he reached for his phone.

"Let me know where you want to have lunch tomorrow," she said as she went to her room.

"I will," he nodded.

"Sweet dreams, Detective," she said before she closed the door.

-s-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Little bit of fun for our gang. So how about some good replies for me? I got all of two last time.


	43. Chapter 27

Alexis sat at a table in the back of a diner near the precinct waiting for Kevin. She drummed her fingers restlessly while she kept an eye on the door.

Kevin breezed through the door with an anxious smile.

"Hey," she smiled when he leaned down to kiss her hello.

"Hey yourself," he pecked at her lips a second time before taking a seat across the table.

"No hot case?" she inquired.

"No, just paperwork," he picked up a menu. "Have you been waiting long?"

"Ten minutes," she shook it off.

"Sorry, Javi got going on one of his stories. You know how it is when he gets going," Kevin chuckled.

"Yeah, I know. Don't worry about it."

"You okay? You look like you half expect me to pull a gun on you," Kevin smiled.

"Hold that thought," Alexis pulled something out of her purse. "I thought you might like this. It's pictures of Hunter."

"Why would you expect me to pull a gun about pictures of Hunter?" he began flipping through the first few pages. "I'm already at peace with Chris's involvement in his life."

"I know. It's one of the pictures I included that you might be angry about," Alexis waited as Kevin flipped. She knew exactly when he found the picture she was worried about.

"Is this my dad?" Kevin gasped.

"I can explain if you'll let me," Alexis said nervously.

"Yes, please explain how my father got to hold my son before I even knew of his existence?" Kevin blew up in a rage.

"Kevin, please calm down," Alexis asked.

"Calm down," he growled, "Calm down, how can you expect me to calm down? Did he know Hunter was mine?"

Alexis looked down at the table top as she nodded, "Can we go someplace for this conversation? A lot of people we know come in here."

"Sounds like we better," he watched as she laid a few dollars on the table to pay for her beverage and tip.

Alexis wrapped her arms around herself as she and Kevin walked down the street, "When my dad told me how bad yours was getting and how he wasn't expected to leave the hospital, I knew that he was probably never going to set eyes on Hunter unless I made it happen."

"You brought Hunter to meet him. Did you consider seeing me, maybe even let me know I had a son?"

"If I had, would you have let me go back to New Orleans, or would you have served me with custody papers or a court order?"

"I don't know," he responded, "I don't know how I would have reacted. You didn't even give me a chance. Did you think so little of me...of us?"

"Kev, listen to my reasoning before we get into my state of mind," Alexis stopped and turned to face him.

"Please tell me what your reasons were for keeping my son from me all these years. Please tell me what brought you to bring Hunter to see my father just before he slipped into a coma."

"I know your sisters have boys, and I know your dad loved them just like I know my dad loves me and Jo. I also know it's different when a son is born. I saw it when Kate had Jamie and Ian. I also know how proud a man is when his son has a son. When I heard your dad wasn't going to get any better, I wanted him to meet his son's son."

Kevin turned away from her, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay.

"Kevin," she touched his shoulder. She was slightly relieved he didn't pull away. "I never set out to hurt you. I wanted to tell you. You don't know how many times I picked up the phone, how many letters I started to write..."

"What did he say?" Kevin asked quietly.

"He wasn't surprised when I told him who I was and who Hunter was. He said he'd known someone besides Jenny was making his boy happy."

"I told him about us...sort of," Kevin cleared his throat.

"Parents can always tell," Alexis smiled a little. "Listen, if you want to take some time with this, I understand."

"Lex, I'm mad," he stated after taking a deep breath, "I've been mad for awhile, but we'll get through this. There isn't anything you could do or say to make me stop loving you or wanting to be a part of your life."

"Will you look at me, please?" Alexis asked.

Kevin turned towards her with his eyes closed.

"Look at me," she caressed his cheek.

He opened his eyes. Alexis's eyes closed as she read the hurt. She opened them before she kissed his cheek, "Take whatever time you need. I'll be there when you want to talk."

Kevin swallowed hard when she turned to leave. His heart felt like it was breaking just as it had when she'd left years earlier.

He grabbed her hand and pulled her back into his arms, "Not again. You're not going anywhere."

Tears trailed down her cheeks and her head came to rest against his shoulder.

"I love you," she whispered.

"I love you," he hugged her close.

Alexis pulled back and put her forehead against his, "He wasn't disappointed in you. You know that, right? He knew how torn you were. He said he saw you when he looked at Hunter."

Kevin swallowed down another lump of emotion. "I need time before I can talk about this."

"Okay," she nodded. "Promise me when you do want to talk, you'll call me?"

"I will," he replied, "How about we have lunch with whatever time I have left of my hour?"

"I'm not that hungry," Alexis admitted. "I think I'm gonna go home. You eat. Maybe look at the rest of the pictures. Call me before you go to sleep. I want to be your last call of the day."

"Okay," he nodded.

"Be safe, Detective," she kissed his cheek.

"Yes, Ma'am," he smiled.

"I love you," she looked deep into his eyes, hopeful that he'd return her sentiment.

"I love you, too," he nodded.

=d=d=d=d=

"Hey Bro, how was lunch?" Javier asked when he saw Kevin back at his desk.

Kevin could only respond with a scowl.

"So, you didn't get lucky or anything?"

"How can I be so in love with someone yet almost equally as mad at her?" Kevin set the album on his desk with a heavy thud.

"You and Doc had a fight," Javier surmised.

"Not exactly a fight," Kevin grunted, "She gave me something that was equal parts thoughtful and thoughtless."

"I'm assuming it was this," Javier tapped the photo album lightly. "You mind?"

"Go ahead," Kevin nodded.

Javi knew immediate which picture had upset Kevin. "I don't know what to say, Bro."

"Neither did I, and I still found a lot to say," Kevin admitted. "The one thing I've wished since the moment I found out I had a son was that my dad would've could've been able to meet Hunter."

"And he did," Javi responded, "Yet I suspect that makes you madder. She had the grace to introduce Hunter to his grandfather, yet she couldn't do the same to his father."

"That's pretty much what I said," Kevin nodded. "Lex asked me if she had introduced us, would I have let her go back to New Orleans or served her with a court order or custody papers."

"Kev, you're never going to know how you would have reacted in the situation. You have to focus on your reactions now. You're getting the chance. Don't mess it up because you're angry. Don't say something that you can't take back," Javi advised him.

"The thing is, I know what I would've done. I would've begged her to stay with me. "

"Maybe that's why she didn't tell you back then," Javi theorized, "I don't want you to take this the wrong way. I know you were unhappy with Jenny back, but Alexis was happy. If you would have begged her to stay, she wouldn't have. She would have gone back to her husband and life in New Orleans. That would have broken you."

Kevin sighed and leaned back in his chair, "I hate it when you're right."

"Really? I kind of like it."

"Alexis wants me to call her tonight before I go to sleep," Kevin sighed, "I don't want to jump down her throat."

"Did your dad know about you and Alexis?" Javier asked suddenly.

"Yeah, I told him, kind of," Kevin admitted.

"How do you kind of tell someone about that?" Javi looked at his partner in confusion.

"I told him I was happy, and he knew it wasn't Jenny making me happy."

"Was he okay with that?" Javi asked.

"Yeah, he was. Lex said that he wasn't disappointed in me."

"All a good parent truly wants is for their child to be happy," Javi stated, "You know that better than anyone."

Kevin smiled a little, "When the hell did you get so smart?"

"I have my moments," Javi chuckled.

Kevin nodded in agreement, "Yes, you do."

Javier flipped the pages again, "That's a good picture of Hunter."

Kevin nodded in agreement before glancing towards the picture of Sarah Grace on his desk. He slipped the picture out of the album and tucked it in next to his daughter's picture. "Remind me to get a frame for that."

"Will do," Javier nodded. "Oh wow, this must have been when she was pregnant with Cade."

"Yeah, that's what she said," Kevin nodded, "Said she was so sick they almost didn't take the trip."

Javier nodded, "You realize that now you'll be returning the favor, so to speak, right?"

"What?"

"You're going to be raising Christopher's son," Javier pointed out. "When Cade has questions about girls or being a man, you're the one he's going to."

"Yeah, maybe," Kevin nodded.

Javier closed the photo album and gave Kevin his full attention, "Are you okay with that?"

"I wonder if Chris would be okay with it," Kevin frowned.

"You said Alexis told you Chris wanted her to tell you about Hunter, right?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"If Alexis had decided she wanted you and her to be together, it would've been after Cade had been born. Christopher had to know that was a risk when he brought up telling you."

"From everything she's told me about Chris, he sounds like a much better man then I could ever hope to be," Kevin frowned.

"No one's perfect," Kate commented walking by. "Don't you two have work to do?"

"Just paperwork," Javi responded, "Kevin's having a few personal troubles that we're talking through."

Kate nodded and her eyes skipped over Kevin's desk, "CVS is having a sale on picture frames."

"I'll make sure to stop on my way home from work," Kevin replied.

Kate smiled, "You know, once everything settles down and you two make it legal, you should think about trying parenthood with Lex again. You make beautiful little boys."

"Cart before the horse, Beckett, but the lady does have a point," Javi snorted.

"I am not taking procreation advice from a man who is allergic to commitment or Alexis's stepmother."

"I'm just making an observation," Kate snorted in amusement before making her way to the break room to make a cup of coffee.

"Hey, just a thought," Javier smiled before he looked over his shoulder at the pictures on Kevin's desk. "One of these days, we'll have to go play ball with the boys."

"Yeah, that would be fun," Kevin agreed

Javier patted his partner's shoulder, "Make sure you're calm when you call Lex tonight."

"Yeah, might need to hit the gym first and go a few rounds with the punching bag," Kevin agreed.

"That's a good idea," Javier nodded. "You want a sparring partner, you know where I am."

"I'll let you know."

"Alright," Javier wandered off to get some files from Kate.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis picked up her cell phone when it rang and answered, "Hello?"

" _It's me,"_ Kevin told her while climbing into bed.

"What time is it?" she looked towards the clock, having lost all sense of time while reading a good book.

" _Almost eleven,"_ he shot a look at the clock beside his bed. _"I didn't wake you, did I?"_

"No," she was quick to assure him, "Just reading my favorite book. Lost track of time."

" _How many times have you read_ _Anne of Green Gables_ _now, Lex?"_

"Dozens," she laughed, "Maggie is getting to the age where she's starting to enjoy the stories as long as I read to her. I got going with her tonight and couldn't put it down."

" _And Hunter and Cade?"_ he asked as he lay back against the head board.

"Cade's more the graphic novel type. He has all the Derek Storm and Nikki Heat ones," Alexis smiled. "Hunter loves Mark Twain, oddly enough."

" _That's my kind of story,"_ he settled into his bed.

"I remember," Alexis nodded. "How was your day?"

" _Not bad,"_ Kevin said, _"A little anti-climatic after lunch."_

"I can see that," Alexis scrunched down in bed and drew up her knees. "No good murders?"

" _Just a lot of paperwork that needed to be caught up on."_

"The dreaded paper chase. Fun," Alexis commented. "Did you get a chance to look at the pictures?"

" _A couple,"_ he admitted, _"Hunter looked mighty cute in the Mickey Mouse ears he was wearing. Did you take him to Disneyland or World?"_

"World," she replied, "It was just before Cade was born. One of these days, I'd like to take the children again."

" _Sounds like fun,"_ Kevin commented. _"You looked cute pregnant."_

"Hunter had so much fun," she admitted.

" _Beckett told me about the night Hunter was born,"_ Kevin admitted.

"Yeah, I know," Alexis nodded. "I should have-You should've been there."

" _I won't disagree with you,"_ Kevin said quietly.

"Kevin, I hope you know how sorry…"

" _Stop right there,"_ he cut her off, _"Stop apologizing."_

"I keep trying to put myself in your place," Alexis said. "I can't even imagine why you still want anything to do with me outside of a courtroom."

" _Because I love you,"_ he responded.

"I wish you were here with me," Alexis looked around her room.

" _I do, too,"_ he sighed, _"I think we're a ways away from having slumber parties."_

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "I went by my grandma's old place the other day. The first thing I thought of when I walked in was that weekend after the first time we said 'I love you'."

" _It rained all weekend,"_ Kevin smiled.

"I don't remember the rain," she smiled.

" _No? I do. You and me on the balcony making love in the rain."_

Alexis bit her lip as the image came back to her.

"Oh, that was you?" she teased, "I thought that was a different beau."

" _Very funny,"_ Kevin chuckled. _"So you do remember?"_

"I remember," she nodded. "I remember everything from that weekend."

" _So do I."_

Alexis smiled as she got out of bed and walked to her balcony doors. Opening them she stepped outside, "Clear night. No chance of rain."

Kevin got out of his bed and went to the window of his room, _"Too bad. I like rain."_

"I do, too…when you're with me," she replied.

" _I'd better attempt some sleep,"_ Kevin replied, _"It's going to be an early morning."_

"Yeah, me too," Alexis agreed. "Thanks for calling."

" _I'll call again tomorrow, if you want,"_ Kevin offered.

"I'd like that."

" _Sleep well, Lex."_

"Sweet dreams, Kev," she said. "I love you."

" _I love you,"_ he responded instantly.

"Goodnight," she said before she disconnected.

-d-d-d-d-d-

We love you guys. Thank you for all the replies. I hope everyone likes this chapter enough to give us as many as the last time.


	44. Chapter 28

Alexis tucked her hair behind her ear while she boxed up some pictures from her grandma's various performances. One of her favorites was one from the eighties when Martha was in _A Midsummer's Night Dream_.

She gave a wistful smile as she remembered how her grandmother regaled her with the tale of her starring role. She always had a way with the theatrics.

Her cell phone tweeted indicating a text message, and she pulled it out. The message was from Kevin.

 _How you doing?_

She smiled at the caring nature his message translated. She quickly typed back, "Been better. Gonna need a drink after this. Interested?"

 _Always. Old Haunt?_

"You have yourself a date. What time do you get off?"

 _I should be done in an hour or two. I'll meet you there._

"Sounds good? And Kevin?"

 _Yeah?_

"Be careful out there, Detective," she replied before she tucked her phone back into her pocket and continued with her task.

Alexis pulled out a picture of Martha just after Richard had been born, "Be happy for me, Gram."

Alexis continued on with her task, losing herself in the memories her grandmother's belongings stirred.

"Don't move," she heard moments before she felt the muzzle of a gun pressed into her back.

Alexis gasped as the flashback hit her of her attack at the morgue.

"Who-who are you?" she asked quietly.

"I'm an associate of Sang Min," the man gave her a devilish smile, "I've been informed you two had the pleasure of meeting already."

Alexis's eyes slid shut as she remembered her 'meeting' with Sang Min.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to finish what Sang Min started," he replied, "We don't like leaving loose ends. They unravel."

"What loose end?"

"You, of course," the villainous man replied, "We were paid to do a job. We always finish what we start."

"No," Alexis shook her head, "That's over. The woman who hired you is in jail."

"But there are others who would like to see you dead," he hissed.

"What?" Alexis asked. "Who?"

"That's of none of your concern," he waved a hand.

"I'd like to know," Alexis said quietly. "If you're going to kill me anyway, what's the harm?"

"You make a good point."

"So?"

"It would seem that your lover's father-in-law isn't fond of his nocturnal activities."

"What?" Alexis gasped.

"Are you surprised? The man cheated on his daughter," the man continued. "If a man did that to my daughter, I'd do the same thing."

"No," Alexis shook her head, "This isn't right. The only thing I did wrong was fall in love with the wrong man."

"You acted on it."

 _Who wrote the book of love?_

"What is that?" the man growled in annoyance

"It's my phone. It's the ring for my dad. He's a writer. If I don't answer it, he's going to start worrying."

"Smart man," her capture cackled, "He should be worried. He's about to lose a daughter."

"My stepmother is a cop. If I don't answer the phone, she's going to come down here with all of her friends."

"I suppose we can't have that," he mused, "I need time to work my magic."

"Should I answer it?"

"I suppose you better," he agreed, "Put it on speaker phone so I can make sure there isn't any funny business. I can't have you tipping him off."

"Fine," Alexis said as she answered the phone. "Hey, Dad."

 _"Alexis, Sweetheart, how are things going at the studio?"_ Rick asked.

"It's a little depressing. I'm sorry it took so long to answer."

 _"It's fine. Are you alright, Honey?"_

"Yeah, just feeling a little nostalgic," Alexis said. "The last time I was here was the last night I was in New York. I had a horrible encounter with Kevin. I said a lot of things I didn't mean."

Rick motioned for everyone to gather around as he put her on speaker phone. Something was wrong. Her voice had an unexplained tension in it. _"I'm sure things are okay now."_

"Yeah, I just don't know if I ever apologized."

 _"I'm sure you did,"_ Rick looked towards Kevin who had a perplexed look on his face. He clearly remembered her apologizing several times since she'd returned to New York.

"I think just being here is making me feel guilty. I lied to so many people for so long. I'm still surprised Kate and Espo talk to me after all of this."

 _"Alexis, why don't you pack it in for the day?"_ he suggested, _"We don't need to finish all of that right this moment. We don't close on the property for a month."_

"I just want to get it done," Alexis replied. "Before I forget, when you pick up your kids, will you tell Kate's mom to make sure my kids get to sleep on time tonight? I let them stay up way too late last night."

The four listening on the other end exchanged a look before Javier picked up the phone to call in a possible hostage situation.

 _"I sure will, Honey. I'll talk to you soon, okay? I love you."_

"Love you, too, Daddy."

"Very good," the man quickly disconnected the call.

Alexis fought back tears.

-d-d-d-

"Captain Gates," Kate called out.

The captain emerged from her office as the group was arming themselves. "What's going on?"

"Someone's got Alexis," Castle was sitting in his chair by Beckett's desk.

"How do you know that?" Captain Gates asked.

"Because she asked Castle if he'd tell my mom to make sure she got the kids to sleep on time tonight," Kate said. "Sir, my mom-"

"Was murdered when you were nineteen," Gates finished. "Did you call SWAT?"

"They're rolling out to the scene as we speak," Beckett pulled out her bulletproof vest, "Castle, Ryan, stay here and man operations from this end. Espo and I will manage things from the scene."

"No way," Kevin said. "No way in hell I'm staying here and waiting to see if Alexis comes home."

"You know as well as I do that you're a liability down there," Kate tried to reason with him, "You're too close to the situation."

"And if it was Castle, where would you be?" he responded before looking to his partner, "Where would you be if it was Lanie?"

"Kevin, we need to do our job," Kate stated.

"It's my job, too, Beckett," Kevin stared her down.

"Not this time," Kate held firm.

"I need to be there," Kevin insisted, "At least give me that much."

"You stay back behind the lines. If you get anywhere near the building, I will make sure Gates puts you on a desk for a _very long time_ ," Kate said after a moment.

"Deal," Kevin quickly agreed, knowing that there was no other way.

Kate turned to her husband, "I know-"

He hugged her tightly and whispered, "I love you. Be careful. Please bring her home."

"I will," Kate vowed. She waited for Kevin to grab his vest before they set out.

-d-d-d-d

"Do we know anything?" Kate asked the SWAT commander when they rolled on scene.

"We were waiting for you," the commander responded, "We haven't attempted to make contact yet. Infrared shows two people inside the studio."

"One of those people is Alexis LaSalle, a city M.E. who was recently stabbed," Esposito said. "Any ideas on the other one?"

"We're working on getting ears inside."

"There's an old trap door in the stage," Ryan spoke up from behind the barricade where he'd been listening. "If you go in through the basement, you might be able to get a camera up through the frame."

The commander called out to several of the SWAT members to do as Kevin suggested.

"How'd you know about the trap door?" Esposito asked.

"Lex and I met here a couple of times when we were together the first time."

"And Mrs. R was okay with that?"

"I don't think she knew," Kevin admitted. "Javi, I don't have to tell you-"

"To bring her back to you? No, you don't."

Kevin swallowed hard as Kate and Javier took off.

He backed away to make good on his promise to stay away from the scene and to give himself some privacy as he looked to the sky, "Okay, I get it. We didn't go about this the right way the first time. That's on me, mostly. I fell in love with her and instead of waiting until I was free I just went after her."

"This isn't punishment," Rick put a hand on Kevin's shoulder.

Kevin jumped a mile in surprise.

"You're not supposed to be here," Kevin said.

"I told Kate what she needed to hear," Rick responded, "I wasn't going to stay put with my daughter in danger."

"This is on me, Castle. If she doesn't make it out of there alive, I'm done."

"Don't say that," Rick scolded him, "You have a daughter that needs you."

"What good am I gonna be to her?"

"Okay, then think about this. Alexis's will? I know what it says. I want my grandson to know his father."

"You can't do that," Kevin growled.

"What? Play the guilt card? Hell I can't," Rick said. "I will do whatever I have to."

Kevin began cursing under his breath as the organized chaos filtered in around them.

"Let them do their job," Rick responded.

"Tell me there's a force out there that will not let three kids lose two parents in less than a year," Kevin said.

"Her name's Kate Beckett," Rick smiled.

Kevin nodded.

=d=d=d=

"What do you see?" Esposito asked Kate as she looked at the monitor.

"Alexis," Kate responded.

"Is she hurt?" Javier asked.

"No, but she's scared," Kate shook her head.

"Any assailant?" the SWAT commander asked.

"Not-wait, there," Kate pointed to the corner of the screen where a leg could be seen.

The camera operator turned the lens so they had a full view of the perp.

"Son of a…" Javier began.

"Familiar?" the Swat commander asked.

"He was a known associate of Sang Min," Javier recalled from the file he'd read, "He's supposed to be dead."

"Dead's not what it used be apparently," Kate said. "When this is over, I'm having Gates call the Governor in Hawaii. Someone needs to check backgrounds of the people in the coroner's office."

"Is he armed?" SWAT asked.

"Oh yes," Javier pointed to the revolver the guy was holding.

"Best plan of attack?" the Swat commander asked, "You know the room best."

"I," Kate started to shake her head before she paused and then looked at Javi, "The catwalk?"

"You guys got repelling gear?" Javier asked.

"Absolutely," the commander said before he got on his radio.

Javier looked at Kate who was staring at the screen, "We'll get her back."

Kate nodded at Javier's assurance.

"I'm going," Javier told the commander, "Get me some rigging. I'll bust through the skylight to be the distraction, and then you can blow through the door."

"Javi, be careful," Kate warned. "I do not want to have to tell Lanie you got yourself shot."

"Used to do this for a living, Kate," he reminded her.

"Be careful anyway," Kate said.

"Yes, ma'am," Javier went with the commander to get the necessary equipment.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin sat on the back of the SWAT van, forehead against clasped hands while Rick leaned against a car next to him.

"This is taking too long," Rick broke up the silence.

"The better prepared they are, the better the odds are," Kevin said not looking up.

"Do you really believe that?"

"I have to," Kevin looked at his friend.

Rick began pacing back and forth as he waited to hear the fate of his daughter.

"Do you think you can bargain with God?" Kevin asked.

"You're the Catholic, you tell me," Rick glanced at his watch. If felt like forever since he'd last checked when in reality it was only a few moments.

"I want your blessing," Kevin said after a moment.

"To have a relationship with my daughter?" Rick asked.

"To marry her," Kevin said.

Rick knew he should have been surprised, but he wasn't. He knew this was the next step for the pair even though they weren't even officially dating. "One condition," he replied.

"What's that?" Kevin asked.

"You get your marriage officially dissolved before you ask," Rick replied.

"Done," Kevin nodded before he put out his hand, "Thank you, Rick."

Rick took his friend's hand and then yanked him into a hug, "Be good to her."

"Always," Kevin promised.

A whirl of activity suddenly picked up around them.

"What's going on?" Rick watched the commotion.

"I don't know," Kevin looked towards the door of the building and then around for a familiar face that he could pump for information.

Everyone was too busy. All the pair could do was wait. A shattering of glass and a lot of commotion startled the pair. Shouts and gunfire broke out and then it went deathly quiet.

The duo had never felt so helpless.

-d-d-d-

"Alexis, are you alright?" Kate knelt down next to the redhead who had thrown herself to the floor when bullets started to fly.

Alexis was shaking as she took inventory of her limbs. She seemed to be alright.

"I think so," she stammered out.

"Thank God," Kate hugged her stepdaughter while taking a deep breath.

"Everything okay?" Javier unhooked himself from the rigging and stepped onto the stage.

"Where did you learn to do that?" Alexis hugged him.

"If I told you-uh never mind. It's a long story," he hugged the younger woman. "Let's get you out of here."

"Dad figured out my clue," Alexis concluded as Kate wrapped her arm around her stepdaughter's shoulders and guided her out of the building.

"Yeah, your dad's good with the cryptic stuff."

"Must come with the writer thing," Javier teased.

"Thank goodness for the writing thing," Alexis wiped at the tears that were falling. She couldn't stop the shaking of her hands.

Kate hugged her to her side, "You have to give a statement before you can go home. We'll get it done as soon as possible and get you out of here."

Alexis stopped, "Kate, there's something you need to know."

"What is it?"

"The guy, he said Jenny's father hired him," Alexis said quietly.

Kate stopped dead in her tracks, "Are you sure you heard him right?"

"He said my lover's father-in-law wasn't happy with Kevin's behavior. I don't think I could have misunderstood him."

Kate pulled out her phone and called the office, requesting a warrant for the telephone and financial records of Jenny's parents.

"What the hell am I going to tell Kevin?" Alexis looked at Javier.

"The truth always works."

"He's going to blame himself, Javi," Alexis shook her head.

"This is on Jenny and her parents," Javier replied.

"I know that, and you know that. Is Kevin going to accept that?"

"Then we'll just have to keep pounding that into his head until it gets through that thick skull of his."

They made it to doors and out to the street where Alexis scanned the faces looking for two in particular.

"Over there," Javier pointed.

Alexis sprinted towards them. The first arms around her were her father's.

"Are you alright, Sweetheart?" he hugged her tight for several minutes.

"I'm okay, Dad," Alexis promised.

"Thank God," Rick gave her a final squeeze and then released her. He nodded to Kevin and walked off to find Kate after releasing a deep cleansing breath.

"Hey," Alexis said before she hugged Kevin tightly.

"Still in one piece?" he tried to give her the once over without letting go of his tight hold.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "Kev, I need to tell you something."

"Whatever it is can wait," he ran his fingers through her hair.

"No, this can't," she took his hands in hers. "This isn't gonna be easy to hear."

"We should get you to the medics, so they need to look you over."

"Kevin, just listen to me for a second," Alexis said. "The gunman said that Jenny's father hired him."

"What!" Kevin's eyes went wide in disbelief.

"I don't know if he made it up or if it's even true, but that's what he said. I wanted to be the one to tell you," Alexis was still gripping Kevin's hands. She wouldn't let him pull away.

"I knew they were upset, but this?" Kevin shook off the possibility.

"Look at me," Alexis said softly. When his eyes met hers, "If it's true, it's not your fault."

"This is ridiculous," Kevin continued to look at her in disbelief.

"I have to give a statement. When I'm done, you're taking me home."

"Yes, I am," he nodded as his hand fell to a nearby car for support. He felt as if he was going to be ill.

"And you're staying all night," she continued.

He nodded, "Sarah Grace is with my mom."

"Good. Come on," Alexis took his hand, "Let's get this statement taken care of, and then we can go back to my place and talk this out."

Kevin nodded and pressed a kiss to her forehead as they walked towards a car.

=d=d=d=d=

Alexis opened the door to her apartment to let herself and Kevin in. Jim came around the corner.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"I'm fine," Alexis assured him with a hug.

"Good. Detective Ryan," Jim shook the younger man's hand. "Kids are all sound asleep."

"Thank you for picking them up at camp and staying with them," Alexis hugged him again.

"Goodnight, Mr. Beckett," Kevin nodded.

"Night," Jim let himself out while Alexis went upstairs to check on her children. The thought of perhaps never seeing them again made her want to see them as soon as possible, even if they were sound asleep.

Kevin turned off the hall lights and found his way to Alexis's bedroom. He loosened his tie and slung his jacket over an armchair before wandering out to her balcony to look out over the city.

"What are you doing out here all by yourself?" she joined him and put her arms around his middle.

"Just thinking," he covered her hands with his. "It's a nice view."

"It's not quite as good as it is at my dad's, but I can't complain."

"I like this one better," he smiled as he looked to his right. "Ah, that must be the infamous hot tub."

"Could I tempt you into a soak?" she inquired.

"Not tonight. I think I'd fall asleep, and I don't want to drown."

"Come on," she pulled on his hand, "Let's go to bed."

"Wait," Kevin stopped her. "I have to-"

"If the word apologize leaves your mouth, I will smack you."

"But…" he began.

"No buts," she responded, "We are not the first two people to ever have carried on an affair and fallen in love. It is not your fault your wife hired a hit man to kill me. It's also not your fault your father-in-law tried to finish the job when the first man failed."

"I love you," Kevin said quietly.

"I love you, too," Alexis smiled, "I never want you to love someone else."

"I know I never want to love anyone else from here on out," he took her hand and kissed it softly.

"Come to bed with me?"

"No asking necessary," he followed her back into the bedroom.

Back inside, Alexis made quick work of his tie and then reached for his suspenders.

"What are you doing, Lex?" he grasped her hands.

"Apparently whatever I'm doing, I'm doing it wrong," she freed her hands and began working on the buttons of his shirt instead.

"Lex, you've been through an awful ordeal," he tried to halt her apparent seduction, "Tonight isn't the night to take that next step."

"When is the time?" she refused to be deterred. "I was reminded today of how precious life is. I don't want to waste another second. I love you, Kevin, and I know you love me. What is the point of waiting?"

Kevin reached out to push a strand of hair away from her face, his fingers lingering against her cheek. The emotions from almost losing her that day hit him hard. He brought her lips to his in a searing kiss that was neither gentle nor timid. He was branding her as his.

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" he had to ask once more before he crossed the line of no return.

"So ready," she spoke softly while she pushed his shirt off his shoulders. "So much so that I feel about ready to burst."

"I want you, Lex," his lips brushed along her cheek and down her neck, "So much that I can barely breathe."

"Then take me," she raised her arms so he could pull away her blouse.

Their clothes melted away, and they tumbled towards the bed.

He paused one final time, searching for any sign of hesitation or fear or any other reason this wasn't a good idea. It was her smile that erased any doubt as they came together. If it was possible, it was better than either remembered. They found their bliss together and fell asleep tangled in each other's arms completely content.

-d-d-d-d-

Tell me good things. Love you guys! A.K.? Tag!


	45. Chapter 29

The sunlight had just begun to stream through the floor to ceiling windows of Alexis's bedroom while Kevin was buttoning his shirt up. It was almost five-thirty. As much as he'd love to crawl into bed with Alexis, he knew Maggie and the boys would be awake in a couple of hours. While their kids might have put together they were seeing each other, he thought it was a little too soon for them to be aware of sleepovers.

Alexis turned abruptly in the bed. He studied her for a moment to determine if it was just typical movement in her sleep or if a nightmare had taken hold again. She'd fought through a few throughout the night.

As her face relaxed, he smiled and recalled other mornings when he'd watched her sleep. Once she'd gotten past the initial panic of their first morning, she tended to sleep a little later than he did.

Kevin slid into bed beside her and gently coaxed her awake by caressing her bare shoulder softly.

"Mmm," her eyes fluttered open. "Hey, you. What time is it?"

"Just after five-thirty," he whispered. "I just wanted to say bye. I'll call you later, okay?"

"What, you're leaving already?" she grasped his hand to keep him close.

"Yeah," he smiled. "The boys and Maggie will be awake soon. I'd love to have breakfast with you guys, but I think I should come to the door after they're awake."

"You have a point," she sighed, "It doesn't mean I have to like that you're running out of here so early. Makes me feel a little cheap."

"Not my intention," he kissed her forehead.

"I know," Alexis smiled. "Call me when you get home, okay? Let me know you got there alright."

"I will," Kevin nodded. "How about we get that drink tonight?"

"Since we missed out last night," she agreed with a bob of her head.

"How are you doing with everything that happened yesterday?" he brushed her hair behind her ear.

"It's scary. Thanks for being there for me," she smiled. "Kate slipped me the name of a therapist."

"If you want some company, let me know."

"I will," Alexis smiled.

"Go back to sleep. I'll talk to you later."

"Will you come back for breakfast?" she settled back against her pillow.

"See you at eight?"

She nodded, "I'll make waffles."

"It's a date," he kissed her once more before pulling the blankets over her shoulders.

"There's an extra set of keys in the drawer in the front hall table," she said, "So you can lock up on your way out."

"Thanks," Kevin grabbed his jacket with a smile and crept towards the front door quietly. He found the keys where Alexis said they would be and let himself out, locking the door behind him. He walked down the hall and pressed the button for the elevator.

When the elevator arrived, he was about to step in when he noticed a figure stepping out. "Oh, Castle, hi," Kevin stammered out.

Rick studied the younger man with an unreadable expression, "Good morning."

"Uh, yeah," Kevin shifted uncomfortably between his feet.

"Stopped over to check on Alexis," he held up the extra cup of coffee he'd acquired for her. "Is she awake?"

"No, she was going back to sleep."

"Then I'll walk you out," Rick smiled and handed him the extra coffee.

"It's not necessary," Kevin accepted the cup, "I'm going to be back a bit later."

"Trying to ease the kids into the whole overnight thing," Rick nodded.

"It's a lot for them to digest," Kevin replied. "We haven't really told them we're dating."

They stepped back into the elevator with their coffees, and Rick pressed the button for the lobby.

"How'd Alexis sleep last night?" he asked Kevin.

"It was a rough one," Kevin released a deep yawn.

"Thanks for staying with her," Rick said. "She's not good at asking for help."

"Yeah, I know," Kevin nodded.

"Kate told me something. You held Alexis's cell phone hostage?"

"She's stubborn. I had to get creative."

"Gets that from her mother."

"Right," Kevin smiled. "Last night, when everything was going on, I couldn't help but think of your mother."

"How's that?"

"I just asked her to keep Alexis safe," Kevin admitted.

"She's done a pretty good job of it," Rick smiled.

"Alexis says she listens to that Meatloaf song 'Martha' every year on the anniversary of her death," Kevin revealed.

"I know," Rick nodded. "She also listens to the Chicago soundtrack on the anniversary of the day she left New York."

"Huh," Kevin said after a moment.

"What?"

"It was playing the night I found Alexis in the studio."

"Explains a lot," Rick replied.

They reached the bottom and Kevin started to step out, "You coming?"

"No," Rick shook his head, "I want to check on Alexis."

"You have a key?"

"Yes," Rick nodded. "Be safe going home."

Once Kevin stepped out of the elevator, Rick hammered the elevator button for Alexis's floor and rode up.

-d-d-d-

Alexis rolled her eyes when she saw her dad sitting on her couch when she finally got herself out of bed around seven-thirty.

"Morning, Dad."

"Morning, Lex," he greeted her.

"How long have you been here?" she went to grab a cup of coffee from the pot he put on for her.

"About an hour and a half," he said conversationally.

"Really? You want some waffles?"

"You should know I never turn down an offer of free food."

"Does Kate know where you are, or should I be expecting a phone call?"

"She knows," he assured her.

"How late was she at the station last night?"

"I'm not sure. I tried to wait up but fell asleep," he confessed.

"I hope she was home when you left. You didn't leave my siblings unsupervised, right?"

"Give me some credit," he snorted.

"I give you plenty of credit."

"How about them waffles?" he suggested, "Did you need help?"

"No. Go wake up the kids…gently," she pointed. "Do not jump on their beds."

"A grandfather should be allowed some fun," he frowned.

Alexis pointed a spatula at him, "Wake Maggie last. She was sniffly yesterday."

"Alright," Rick wandered off to carry out his task.

Alexis was mixing the batter when she heard the front door open, "Marco?"

"Polo!" Sarah Grace answered as she came into the room.

"Hey, Sarah Grace," Alexis went to greet her with a hug.

"Are you okay, Dr. LaSalle? Daddy said you were sick," Sarah Grace looked at her.

"I'm better now," Alexis frowned her confusion as she looked to Kevin for some sort of explanation.

"He said that's why he stayed here last night," Sarah Grace continued.

"Oh, right," Alexis nodded.

"I wanted to bring you soup, but Daddy said it was too early for that. We brought you orange juice instead," she held up the bottle. She'd insisted on having her father stop at the store on their way.

"Thank you," Alexis took the orange juice and kissed the top of her head. "Hey, my dad is upstairs waking up the boys and Maggie. Can you make sure he's nice about it?"

"Okay," Sarah Grace took off.

Alexis smiled as she set down the bottle of orange juice and then turned towards Kevin, "Caught you coming in this morning, did she?"

"Guess I should have left earlier," he pecked at her lips.

"Coffee?"

"Yes, please."

Alexis took a mug out and poured Kevin a cup. She handed it to him before getting out the creamer and sugar, "As you like it."

Kevin made himself coffee and then sat at the counter, "You fall back asleep after I left?"

"For a bit," Alexis nodded, "It was a bit fitful, but at least there were no nightmares."

"I'm glad," he lightly touched his fingertips to hers.

"When do you think we should tell the kids were dating?" Alexis asked.

"Soon," Kevin smiled. "How do you think they'll take it?"

"Honestly? I think the boys will be tougher nuts to crack. Maggie likes you."

"Yeah, that's what I've been thinking too," Kevin nodded.

"It's never going to be the right time to tell them that I'm dating again. I could wait until they're all grown up and out of the house, and it's still going to be a bit tough for them to swallow," Alexis tugged at one of the buttons on his shirt. "They loved Chris a lot. The pain of losing him isn't going away, but they need to see that life moves on."

"I'm sorry any of you had to go through this," Kevin caught her hand in his. "I wish there was something I could do to make it stop hurting."

"Just be available when I need someone to talk to," she requested, "When it's a very bad day, perhaps offer a shoulder to cry on too."

"Just pick up the phone or hunt me down," he smiled at her before listening. Hearing nothing to indicate anyone was coming, he leaned forward and kissed her.

Several minutes later, Maggie came down the stairs with a sniffly nose. "Mommy, I need a tissue."

"Come here, Baby," Alexis came around the counter and scooped her up, She felt the little girl's forehead and frowned, "You have a fever, Little One."

"Does that mean I can't go camping today?" the young girl frowned.

"Unfortunately, yes," Alexis nodded. "If you want, you can be sick in my bed."

"Can I have a tissue first?" Maggie sniffled again.

"Yes," Alexis returned her daughter to her feet, "I have some in my bathroom. Take the box with you when you lay down. I'll bring you breakfast in bed. Do you want waffles?"

"Oatmeal," Maggie shook her head.

"Oatmeal, it is," Alexis nodded as Maggie scampered off.

"Poor thing," Kevin frowned.

"She was having so much fun at the day camp," Alexis frowned along with him. "I hate when she's sick. The boys, they pretend to be tough until they're practically passing out at the dinner table, but Maggie, she's pitiful."

"Did Maggie come through here with her tissue request?" Rick came down with his grandsons behind him each half awake.

"Yeah," Alexis looked behind her dad. "Where's Sarah Grace?"

"She's watching cartoons in the game room."

"I have to make oatmeal for Maggie. Can you make waffles for everyone else?" Alexis asked her dad as Kevin went upstairs.

"Hey Kiddo, what's going on?" Kevin asked from the doorway of the game room.

"Nothing, I'm just watching cartoon. Mr. Castle turned them on for me."

"You hungry? We're making waffles," Kevin said.

"Daddy, what happened yesterday with Grandpa?" Sarah Grace asked, seemingly out of the blue.

"Let me guess, Grandma Brenda called the house last night, and Grandma Bridget wouldn't let you talk to her?" Kevin asked.

"I heard Grandma Bridget say he did something very bad," Sarah Grace nodded.

"He did, yes," Kevin nodded. "Sarah Grace, I don't think you're old enough to know what he tried to do."

"Is he going to jail too, like Mom?" she frowned.

"I don't know yet," Kevin hedged.

Sarah Grace picked at a loose thread on her sleeve. "Daddy, am I going to do bad things too?"

"No," Kevin shook his head and sat down with her. "Sweetie, you are a good person."

"But Mom did bad things, and Grandpa did bad things. That means I'm going to do bad things, doesn't it?"

"Mom and Grandpa chose to do bad things," Kevin stated, "You don't have to make the same choices."

"Why did they make those choices?" Sarah Grace looked upset.

"I think your mom was jealous, and your grandpa was mad at me."

"I'm mad at you too," Sarah Grace admitted, "I mean, kinda. Not as much as before."

"That's good to know," Kevin smiled. "It's okay to be mad at me. I did a lot wrong, but I did something very right."

"What's that?" Sarah Grace asked.

"I got you," he hugged her around the shoulders.

"I love you, Daddy," Sarah Grace said quietly.

"I love you, too," he told her.

"Waffles," Castle's voice drifted up.

"Are you hungry?" Kevin pulled Sarah Grace to her feet.

"Yes," she nodded.

Kevin and Sarah Grace headed down to join everyone at the table.

"Where's Maggie?" Sarah Grace asked when she realized there was one person missing from the table.

"Eating oatmeal in bed," Alexis said. "She's got the sniffles."

"She needs some of that orange juice we brought," Sarah Grace stated.

"That is a wonderful idea," Alexis smiled. "Do you want to take it to her?"

"If it's okay," Sarah Grace nodded.

"I'll go with you," Alexis replied.

"Okay," Sarah Grace nodded as Kevin poured a glass of orange juice and handed it to her.

"How's the oatmeal, Mags?" Alexis and Sarah Graced entered her bedroom. Maggie was in bed with the blankets pulled up to her nose. The television was playing her favorite morning cartoon. "Sarah Grace wanted to bring you this orange juice. Are you thirsty?"

"Yes, please," Maggie nodded as she sat up straight with a smile. "Thank you, Sarah Grace."

"You're welcome," Sarah Grace smiled, "What are you watching?"

"Scooby Doo," Maggie smiled. "Do you wanna watch with me?"

"Is it okay, Dr. LaSalle?" Sarah Grace looked towards Alexis for permission.

"Sure," Alexis smiled. "I'll bring in your breakfast. Why don't you take your shoes off and get up on the bed?"

Maggie scooted over to make room for Sarah Grace.

"And Sarah Grace? You can call me Alexis," the redhead smiled at the younger girl.

"Okay," Sarah Grace stated while climbing onto the bed.

Alexis went back into the dining room to grab a plate of food for Sarah Grace.

"Where's Sarah Grace?" Kevin asked.

"She and Maggie are watching Scooby Doo in my room," Alexis picked up Sarah Grace's plate, "I told her I'd bring in breakfast."

"I'll take it in," Kevin said.

"I've got it. You stay and eat," Alexis smiled.

Alexis returned to her bedroom. The pair was giggling away at what was on the screen.

"Breakfast is served," Alexis said handing Sarah Grace a plate.

"Thank you," Sarah Grace replied.

"Mags, make sure you cough and sneeze into the tissues. You don't want to be spreading your germs," Alexis advised her daughter.

"Yes, Mommy," Maggie nodded.

Alexis kissed her forehead and then returned to the breakfast table.

Alexis took a seat, "Where are the boys?"

"Upstairs, getting dressed," Rick smiled. "Those two gobbled their food down and raced back upstairs."

"Dad, would you mind bringing them to camp?" Alexis asked, "I don't want to leave Maggie alone."

"It would be my pleasure, Sweetheart," Rick nodded.

"I don't know how I functioned without you," Alexis gave him a grateful smile.

"I'm irreplaceable, I know," Rick smiled.

"And so modest," Alexis teased.

"I'd better get Sarah Grace," Kevin glanced at his watch, "I need to drop her off at the rec center for her dance lesson. My mom volunteered to pick her up."

"Can I get a rain check on that drink?" Alexis asked him.

"Call me when Maggie's feeling better," Kevin kissed her cheek.

"I will," she smiled. "No matter what, I'll call you tonight."

"Not if I call you first," he winked at her.

"Dad, go upstairs and help the boys get ready," Alexis reached out to pull Kevin closer.

"I know when I'm being dismissed," Rick left the room.

Alexis kissed Kevin lightly, one arm around his neck and the other hand on the side of his face.

"What's that for?" he asked.

"Because I wanted to give you a proper goodbye," she smiled, "I've just been reminded of how precious life is."

"No kissing in front of the kids yet," Kevin nodded.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "Also, I didn't want to be the girl who gives it up and then goes poof."

"Poof?"

"Poof," Alexis nodded.

"You'll never be the girl that went poof to me," he assured her.

"Good," Alexis smiled. "Last night was amazing, in case I didn't tell you."

"We'll have to do that again very soon," he smiled.

"Sign me up," she nodded.

"I'll do that," Kevin smiled at her. "In the meantime, I should get Sarah Grace and get going before I give into a very powerful impulse."

"Have a safe day at work."

"I will. I'll talk to you later?"

"You better," Alexis smiled at him.

Kevin and Sarah Grace left, and her father took the boys shortly thereafter. Alexis climbed into bed with her daughter. "How are you feeling, Maggie Mae?"

"My head feels full," Maggie frowned and laid her head on her mom's lap.

"I'm sorry, Baby," Alexis stroked her hair.

"Mommy, do you like Defective Wyan?"

"Detective Ryan," Alexis snorted, "And yes, I do."

"I think he likes you, too," Maggie said.

"Yeah, I think he does."

"He's nice," the little girl said softly.

"I'm glad you think so," Alexis smiled.

"Cade thinks Daddy would like him," Maggie confessed.

"Miss Maggie, have you been listening to your brothers' talking again?"

"Maybe," Maggie nodded.

"You're not supposed to eavesdrop on your brothers, Sweetheart," Alexis halfheartedly scolded her daughter.

"I know, but they don't tell me anything," Maggie frowned.

"That's not an excuse," Alexis replied.

"I'm sorry, Mommy," Maggie's frown became more pronounced.

"I know you are," Alexis smiled as she scrunched down a little and Maggie turned over to lie on her back. "Just try to remember that listening to other people's conversations isn't polite."

"Okay," Maggie nodded.

"Honey, you know how Aunt Merry used to go out with a guy to dinner?"

"Yes," she replied, "He was her boyfriend. Daddy didn't like him though."

"I know," Alexis nodded. "I want to know how you'd feel if I did that."

"Went to dinner with Aunt Merry's boyfriend?" Maggie asked, "He's yucky."

"No," Alexis shook her head. "How would you feel if I went to dinner with Kevin?"

"Does that mean Defective Wyan would be your boyfriend?" Maggie asked.

"After a while, yes, he would be considered my boyfriend," Alexis decided to fudge the facts a bit. "But right now, it's just a date."

"But Daddy was your boyfriend," Maggie frowned.

"Yes, he was," Alexis nodded. "How do I explain this? Your daddy and I were married, and marriage only lasts until one of the two dies. I think Daddy would be okay if I dated someone else since he can't be here anymore."

"Do you miss Daddy?" Maggie asked.

"I do," Alexis nodded. "I probably always will, but I know your daddy wouldn't want me to be alone forever."

"You smile a lot when Defective Wyan is here," Maggie noted.

"Baby, I think you should call him Kevin," Alexis bit her lip to keep from laughing.

"I like calling him Defective Wyan," Maggie frowned.

"Oh, Sweetheart, you are my favorite daughter," Alexis kissed her forehead.

"I'm your only daughter," Maggie giggled.

"And I am so glad for that, because if I had two Maggie's, I'd lose my mind," Alexis tickled her daughter.

Maggie continued to giggle and attempt to squirm away until a sneezing fit took hold. Alexis quickly retrieved a tissue and handed it to her daughter.

Once it was over Alexis held up the trashcan beside her bed and Maggie threw her tissues away before she laid her head back down on Alexis's lap.

-d-d-d-d-

"Okay, pouring," Alexis said into the phone as she sat down at the counter later that evening once the children were occupied or asleep for the evening.

" _Me too,"_ Kevin smiled on his end.

"How was your day?" Alexis asked after taking a sip from her glass of water. They were supposed to be having drinks, but she didn't want to go to bed with alcohol on her breath, considering she had a bedmate for the evening.

" _Not bad,"_ Kevin smiled. _"Before I forget, Gates said to tell you she's glad you're okay."_

"Yeah, me too," Alexis replied.

" _You doing okay with everything?"_ he asked.

"So far, so good," Alexis said. "Maggie and I took a nap today and no nightmares."

" _How's she feeling?"_

"She's still nasally, but her head doesn't feel stuffy anymore."

" _That's an improvement,"_ he replied.

"I talked to her today about us," Alexis admitted.

" _You did?"_ Kevin asked. _"And?"_

"Well, she was cautious at first," Alexis nodded. "I think she'll be okay with it."

" _Did you try the boys?"_ he asked.

"Not yet," she replied.

" _It'll be harder with them,"_ Kevin nodded.

"Yeah, they're older," Alexis said. "I hope you aren't offended with Mags calling you Defective Wyan. She really likes saying it."

" _I think it's cute,"_ Kevin admitted. _"Just don't let Javi hear her, okay?"_

"I'll do my best."

" _I really wish I was there with you right now,"_ Kevin stated.

"Me, too," Alexis admitted, "Though I won't be sleeping alone tonight."

" _Oh, do you have another boyfriend I don't know about?"_ he asked.

"Very funny," Alexis smiled. "Where are you right now?"

" _Sitting at the kitchen table at my mom's place."_

"What are you wearing?"

" _You first,"_ Kevin teased.

"Oh god," Alexis laughed, "I can't do this. The boys could come down at any moment."

" _And getting caught having a semi-obscene conversation by my mother or daughter would not be a good thing,"_ Kevin chuckled.

"It was so cute to see Sarah Grace and Maggie interacting this morning," Alexis admitted.

" _Like sisters?"_ Kevin ventured.

"It'd be nice," Alexis nodded.

" _One day,"_ he vowed.

"You trying to tell me something?"

" _Just making a promise."_

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "You gonna ask for my dad's blessing?"

" _Probably should this time,"_ he conceded, choosing not to reveal that he had already.

"You are so old-school, Kevin."

" _Can't help it,"_ he replied.

"I like it," Alexis admitted. "You always treated me with respect, starting with giving me an out that first night."

" _I don't know what I would have done if you took me up on that out,"_ he frowned.

"There was no going back after the first time you kissed me," Alexis told him.

" _I didn't realize my kisses were that earth shattering,"_ he teased.

"I can't describe it, but I just knew there was no going back."

" _For me either,"_ he agreed.

"Let's have dinner this weekend," Alexis suggested.

" _When and where?"_

"Anywhere," Alexis smiled.

" _Dangerous statement to make,"_ he replied, _"I'll figure out something."_

"Good," Alexis smiled. "We should hang up."

" _Yeah, it's getting late,"_ he glanced at the clock on the wall. _"I'll call you tomorrow."_

"You better," Alexis smirked. "I love you."

" _I love you, too,"_ he replied, _"Sleep well."_

"Sweet dreams," she returned. "Good night."

-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Closer and closer to an actual date…


	46. Chapter 30

Alexis looked at her watch, tapped her nails against the table, and then took a sip of her drink.

"Hey, Babe, sorry I'm late," Kevin leaned down and kissed her softly.

"It's okay. You're only a few minutes late, and I know how it can get when you try to leave the station," she gave him a reassuring smile, "Where's Sarah Grace tonight?"

"My mom," Kevin took a seat and then looked at the curious third seat. She'd led him to believe they were dining alone. "Are we expecting someone else?"

"Yeah, my dad."

"I didn't realize this was some weird three way," he smirked.

"I thought we should all get things out in the open," Alexis glared at him for his inappropriate comment, "Especially now that you and I are sorta dating."

"Sorta dating?" Kevin rose an eyebrow. "We'll talk about that later. Look, he and I are fine."

"Really? I talked to Kate last night."

"That was Javi's fault."

"And the fight over the chow-mein?"

"He's still coming to terms with us," Kevin replied, "I didn't expect him to call me son in a day."

"You two were friends for years before you ever saw me naked," Alexis reminded him.

"And we'll get back to that," Kevin stated confidently.

"I hope so, but I'm going to help you along," Alexis said, "Starting tonight."

"What exactly is your plan?" Kevin asked, "I didn't bring my sparring gloves."

"I'm getting you both drunk," Alexis motioned a waiter over. "Double scotch, Sweetheart?"

"And keep them coming," he pulled at his tie, "I picked a bad night to accessorize. Just gives him an easy way to strangle me."

"I like it," she yanked on his tie to bring his lips against hers, "Gives me a chance to do this."

Kevin smiled as he returned the kiss, "I missed this."

"So, more kissing?"

"Absolutely," he replied, "Let's just kiss all day, every day."

"A-hem," a very familiar voice said.

"Hi, Dad," Alexis spoke against Kevin's lips, "Find the place okay?"

"Could you remove your lips from his before you ask that, please?" Castle requested as he sat down and beckoned the server over to order his drink. He knew he'd need a lot of alcohol to not strangle the man that he'd seen as a brother for nearly two decades.

"Sorry," Alexis leaned back in her chair. "How are you?"

"Super, Sweetheart," he kissed her cheek, "Never better. I always enjoy watching my daughter making out with one of Kate's partners."

"So, how was your day?" Alexis made polite conversation.

"Good," Castle nodded. "Jamie came with me to a book signing. He had a lot of fun."

"Maybe he'll pick up the pen one day," Alexis smiled.

"It would be nice to have one of my children follow in my footsteps," he replied.

"I always saw Jo as the writer," Kevin chimed in.

"Nah, she'll be the lawyer," Alexis shook her head. "She's got a clear sense of right and wrong."

"Johanna Castle, attorney at law," Castle smiled. "Her grandma would've loved that."

"And Ian?" Kevin said.

"Detective Ian Castle," Alexis nodded, "Him and his nephews."

Kevin noticed that Castle wasn't making eye contact with him at the same time as Alexis.

"Are we going to discuss the elephant in the room?" Alexis asked.

"Can't we eat first?" Castle asked.

"No," Alexis held firm, "We are going to talk all this through."

"Lex," Kevin shook his head. "Maybe we should wait until we have a few drinks."

"No," Alexis replied, "Dad, Kevin and I had a relationship eight years ago. It was a choice that we both made. You can be as mad as you want about us sneaking around behind your back, but you can't continue to give Kevin the silent treatment."

"We talk to each other," Castle protested.

"Saying 'excuse me' or 'pass the sugar' does not count," Alexis said.

"Excuse me for not being excited by the thought that my daughter and one of my closest friends, who happened to be married, had an affair behind the backs of everyone they knew and loved."

"Okay, I deserve that," Alexis said.

"We deserve that," Kevin corrected. "Castle…Rick, if I had come to you and told you I was in love with your daughter, what would you have said to me?"

"After I beat the crap out of you, I would have reminded you that you were married and had a daughter of your own," Castle reminded, "And I would have told you to keep your hands off mine."

"What would have said to me if I'd told you I was in love with Kevin?" Alexis asked

"I would have told you to find someone your own age that wasn't married after I grounded you and locked you into your room for life," Castle replied.

"What bothers you more?" Alexis asked, "That we had an affair, that he was older, or that we did it behind everyone's back?"

"It bothers me that you lied to me," Castle said. "Alexis, you never lied to me before that."

"Forgive me, I didn't want you to go to jail."

"So you waited eight years and then picked up where the two of you left off," Castle replied, "How long did you two wait to reclaim that magic?"

"Dad, that's not fair," Alexis scowled at him.

"Castle, back off," Kevin said. "I didn't try for anything other than friendship until after she was stabbed."

"And even then, I kissed him first."

"That makes things so much better," Castle responded sarcastically.

"Like it or not, Dad, Kevin and I are in love," Alexis entwined her fingers through Kevin's, "We're planning a future together. You don't have to like it, but we're not going to hide out. You'll have to find a way to deal with it or…"

"Or what," Castle challenged her, "Are you going to cut me out of your life?"

"I don't want to," Alexis shook her head, her eyes filling with tears. "Dad, you were mother and father to me for a long time. I love you. So do my kids, but I won't let your hostility come between any of us. Just remember how much you care about Kevin."

"Now who's not being fair?"

"Castle, I love your daughter," Kevin squeezed Alexis's hand.

"I don't want to hear from you," Rick replied.

"That's too damn bad," Kevin stopped Castle from speaking further. "I love your daughter, and I will continue to be a part of her life whether you like it or not. You and me, we're going to find a way to be civil because we both want Alexis to be happy."

"This was a bad idea," Alexis said suddenly. "I should've left things along. Why did I ever think that you'd get over your anger over what you perceive as a betrayal? I'm just your daughter after all."

"Alexis," Castle finally realized how much this was affecting his daughter, "I'm sorry. I should rise above this. You two have both owned up to your mistakes and are trying to make amends, but I hope you realize how much it hurt that you kept such a secret from me."

"I know," tears welled in Alexis's eyes, "And I'm sorry. If I had it all to do over again, I would have told you."

"And I would've run over Kevin with my car," Castle said.

"A few months in the hospital would have been worth it," Kevin winked in Alexis's direction.

"Just tell me one thing," Castle said. "Did your grandmother know?"

"Well…" Alexis hedged.

"That's a yes," Rick concluded.

"I knew Gram wouldn't try to kill him. Though she did wish she knew where Grandpa was."

"Interesting idea," Alexis could see the wheels begin to spin in her father's head.

"Don't you dare," Alexis scolded him.

"It's a thought."

"Dad," Alexis frowned darkly at him and then started to laugh, "Oh God."

"What's so funny?" Kevin asked.

"The day Chris asked me to marry him, he also asked me about you. He wanted to know what kind of a guy you were. I started by telling him how old I was when I met you. When I told him I was fifteen, he asked me to please tell him that I wasn't sleeping with you back then because if we were he'd have to come up here and 'take a belt to your punk ass'," Alexis imitated her husband's accent.

"Lucky for me you were more than legal," he brought her hand to his lips.

"The belt part still appeals to me," Castle muttered.

"Dad," Alexis frowned.

"Forget I said anything," Castle replied, "So what happens now?"

"That depends," Alexis replied, "Are you going to start treating Kevin normally again?"

"Lex," Kevin shook his head.

"No, it's a fair question," Castle said. "I admit to missing my conspiracy theory buddy."

"He hasn't gone anywhere," Alexis replied, "He's still the same Kevin Ryan that he's always been."

"Yes, I know," Castle nodded. "So, how about I buy dinner?"

"It's a start," Alexis smiled.

"Drinks would be better," Kevin smiled.

"Dad, will you look at your menu?"

"Why?" Castle responded, "Is my daughter hungry?"

"Not exactly," Alexis smiled as she pulled Kevin into a kiss.

Rick promptly pulled his menu up to block his view.

"Can't we get rid of your father," Kevin whispered in Alexis's ear.

"Maybe later," she chuckled, "But let's get him to pay for dinner first. He's loaded, and you and I merely work for the city."

"Can I walk you home?"

"Wanna carry my books too?"

"I'll carry you, if you're not careful, Dr. LaSalle," he snorted.

"Are you two done?"

"For a bit," Alexis smiled.

"Good, I want an appetizer," Castle signaled the waiter.

Alexis glanced around the room while Castle went about ordering. Her eyes settled on a young father helping his son cut his meat. Her heart ached.

"I need to tell him," Alexis said suddenly.

"What?" Kevin looked at her and then followed her line of sight.

"Hunter," Alexis swallowed hard, "He needs to know the truth."

"Lex," Kevin started, "He's eight."

"And every time I mention your name he gets this look on his face. It's the same one I used to get when Dad would go out with one of his bimbos."

"I rank that high to Hunter, huh," Kevin frowned, "Just a male bimbo…a himbo."

"He probably thinks it's too soon for me to be dating," Alexis replied.

"I could talk to him," Castle offered.

"No. It's time I talked to him," Alexis said.

"Lex, are you sure enough time has passed?" Kevin asked, "It has barely been six months."

"I should've fixed this a long time ago," Alexis shook her head. "It's never going to be the right time to tell him, but he needs to know. He needs to know where he came from."

Kevin took her hand and rested his forehead against her temple, "I'll be with you if you want."

"No," she shook her head, "He's going to be upset, and I don't want you to be the target of his anger."

"So, you want to be the target all by yourself?"

"It's my mistake," Alexis said. "I'll call you after. You can talk me off the ledge."

"That had better be a metaphor."

"I hope so," Alexis took a shaky breath.

"You want another glass of wine?" Castle asked.

"Fill her up."

-d-d-d-d-

"Night Dad, thanks for dinner," Alexis gave her dad a hug outside the restaurant.

"You're welcome," he replied, "If you want my help with Hunter, let me know."

"I will," Alexis nodded.

"Goodnight, Ryan," Castle shook the other man's hand.

"Night, Castle," Kevin nodded, "Thanks for dinner."

"Be good to her," Castle gave Kevin a final warning, "You don't want to feel my wrath."

"And I have a feeling that Kate would be helping you," Kevin nodded.

"That's why I married her," Castle gave the detective a proud smile.

Kevin hailed a cab and then helped Alexis in before climbing in next to her.

"I can see myself home," Alexis assured Kevin.

"You could," Kevin nodded, "But then I wouldn't get my goodnight kiss."

"You making a move on me, Detective?" Alexis fought a grin.

"I'm trying," Kevin smiled.

"Good," she pulled him into her while the cab navigated the street of the city. "Are you staying the night?"

"I would love to, but you have kids that are still going to be awake when we get there," Kevin reminded her.

"Yeah," she frowned.

"Soon," he told her.

"We could go to a hotel," she teased.

"No," Kevin laughed.

"No more hotels?" she frowned, "I kinda missed those."

"Once," Kevin reminded her. "I only took you to one."

"Really?" she replied, "It felt like more."

"Just once," he repeated.

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "I miss Gram's place sometimes."

"Me too," he kissed her forehead.

"How about this weekend, we get us a hotel room?" he suggested, "We can order room service and enjoy some quietness."

"I think, yes," Alexis smiled. "You know, Kate and I went shopping last weekend. On impulse I bought this nightgown. It's lacy and green."

"And you're just now telling me," he groaned.

"Well, if I'd told you at dinner, we'd have been gone before my dad showed up."

"And how is that bad?" he pressed his lips to hers.

"Admit it, we needed tonight to happen."

"Yeah, we did," he conceded.

"Maybe I'll get Lanie and Javi to baby-sit this weekend. The kids love them," Alexis smiled.

"Maybe Sarah Grace could stay too," Kevin replied, "It might be good for all the kids to get together again."

"And Sarah Grace loves her uncle Javi," Alexis smiled.

"So it's settled," he nodded when the taxi pulled up to Alexis's building.

"Yes," Alexis smiled. "And then when I get home, I'll sit Hunter down."

"There is no rush," Kevin tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Thank you for being so great about all of this," she touched his cheek softly, "You would have been justified in kicking and screaming until I told Hunter the truth as soon as I returned to New York."

"Trust me, I had the impulse," Kevin confessed.

"I wouldn't have blamed you," Alexis conceded. "I also wouldn't have been surprised by custody papers."

"I was tempted," he swallowed hard, "But where would that have left us?"

"In a bad situation," Alexis nodded. "I probably would've had you banned from Autopsy."

"At minimum," he replied, "I want us to be a family, all of us, so even though it's slow going, it's worth it."

Alexis smiled and kissed him, "I love you, and I wish I could go to bed with you tonight."

"This weekend," he vowed.

"Can't come soon enough," she kissed him one last time before exiting the vehicle.

"Sleep well, Lex," Kevin called.

"Sweet dreams, Kev," Alexis smiled as she walked into her building.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. I'm thankful for all of my readers whose replies I love. ;)


	47. Chapter 31

"Kevin, if you're doing this to take silly pictures of me, you are in huge trouble," Alexis said when Kevin lead her down a hallway. She'd been wrapped up in a blindfold since he'd picked her up for their date. 

Maggie had been adorable in asking Kevin all sorts of questions. She could sense that Hunter and Cade had a few more reservations about the evening as it was her first official date since their father had died, but they hadn't said anything.

"Just a few more steps," his fingers caressed the bare skin of her shoulders.

Alexis rolled her eyes under the blindfold when Kevin stop her. She waited patiently as she heard the clicking of locks.

"Two steps forward," he whispered in her ear.

She felt a shiver run down her spine. The words went straight to her soul. They'd taken giant steps forward in the last month. She never thought they would get to this place.

Wherever this place was...

"Do I get to know where we are yet?"

"I should make you suffer a bit longer," he dropped a kiss to her shoulder.

"Are you really wanting to spend the rest of the weekend alone with just your hand for company?"

"Would you really do that?" Kevin ran his hand down her side and then wrapping his arm around her waist from behind.

"You never know," she leaned back against him. "I did miss you a little last night."

"Just a little?" he tried to sound wounded, but it couldn't quite pull it off especially after she gave a little wiggle. It came out more as a groan.

"So how about it, Detective?" she asked, "Ready for the unveiling?"

"Okay," Kevin untied her blindfold and pulled it away.

Alexis blinked and looked around her. They were in Martha's old apartment and on the counter were a bouquet of orange roses. She walked over and gently fingered the petals.

"How did you get a key?" Alexis looked around with intrigue.

"Kate was willing to give me the one she had," Kevin put his hands on her hips.

"Do you remember that first weekend we stayed her after we said those three little words," Alexis smiled.

"Absolutely. That would be a hard weekend to forget," he confirmed, "Only this time there is no sneaking around, no worrying about a father finding out, a wife calling to interrupt. It's just you and me for the weekend."

"The entire weekend?" she looked to him a little taken aback, "I don't have any clothes here."

"I don't think that's going to be a problem," he chuckled.

"Kids?"

"Your dad, Kate, my mom, and Jim," Kevin assured her.

Alexis turned around to face him, "What do you want to do first?"

"How about a dance on the balcony?" he guided her towards the French doors.

"Sounds perfect," Alexis followed him.

On the way, he switched on the stereo to the preprogrammed station he had selected for their evening.

"I love this time of year in New York," Alexis eagerly wrapped her arms around his shoulders as they began to sway.

"It can get a bit stifling in the heat of the summer," he felt the sweat begin to bead on his forehead.

"Try having this kind of heat in December," Alexis giggled. "Now is the right time for heat."

"Have I mentioned how beautiful you look in this dress?" his fingers trailed down the fabric, trying desperately to keep his urges at bay. He wanted to give her the romantic evening she deserved after all that she'd gone through in the last seven months.

"Feel that humidity?" Alexis asked, "Feels like rain."

"Wouldn't that be-" Kevin broke off when thunder rumbled. "No way."

"It's our lucky day," she gave him a radiant smile, "I think we get to let history repeat itself."

Kevin smiled and kissed her, "We get a better ending this time though."

"For the entire story, yes we get a better ending. As for tonight, I want the same ending."

"I was pretty happy with the way this night ended back then," he agreed.

He felt her fingers danced along the nape of his neck. He could feel the sexual energy building. They hadn't been able to find time together since the night she'd been rescued from the second mad man. He longed for her.

"I can't tell you how many times I fantasized about that night on this balcony," she purred into his ear.

"You have no idea what summer storms used to do to me," Kevin murmured. "Every rumble of thunder, every streak of lightning..."

"Such a turn on, right," she gave a wicked grin.

Alexis's hands fell to his waist and pulled his T-shirt free.

"Lex, we have plenty of time for that," he brought her hands back around his neck.

"I just want to make sure you're ready for when the raindrops start falling," she sucked lightly at his neck, her tongue dancing along his Adam's apple. She smiled victoriously at the groan that bubbled up from the back of his throat.

"I missed you," he hissed. "You don't play fair."

"I never do," Alexis smiled.

Kevin's fingers went to the ties holding her halter dress together and quickly pulled them free. The fabric floated down to pool at their feet. She was left with a lacy green bra and matching panties.

"So beautiful," he murmured.

Alexis bit her lip as she pushed Kevin's shirt up, his arms going with it so that they could get it off. Once it joined her dress, she lightly traced his chest and abdomen.

She placed a feather light kiss to the skin above his heart before planting a kiss to his lips.

"You're playing with fire, Dr. LaSalle," he groaned.

"Good," she responded breathlessly just as the raindrops began to lightly fall.

-d-d-d-

Alexis was drying her hair with a towel when she emerged from the bedroom. She was wearing a man's dress shirt while Kevin flipped through the takeout menus.

"Think any of those places are still in business?" Alexis asked as she hugged him around the middle.

"We'll find out," he smiled. "What do you feel like?"

"I'm craving Chinese for some reason," she replied.

"Sounds good to me," Kevin agreed.

"Where'd you find the dry shirt?" his hand danced down her back.

"In the back of a drawer in the guest room," she sat down on the table in front of him. "Gram never looked in there."

"Looks a bit familiar," he reached for his phone to call in their order.

"Smells familiar too," she inhaled the scent lingering on the collar, "Even after all these years."

He looked up at her and smiled, "I always wondered where it went."

"I guess I kept a lot of stuff that I should've given back."

"Looks better on you," he replied while he began dialing, "General Tso's still your favorite?"

"Yeah," she nodded before she slid off the table. She bent down and kissed his cheek before she wandered over to the couch and sat down.

Kevin placed an order for all their favorites, throwing in an order of her favorite cream cheese wontons that she claimed not to like because of their calorie count but secretly loved. He then joined her on the sofa, pulling her into his lap with her legs on her side of his thighs. "Food should be here in thirty minutes."

"Good," she nodded. "You trying to tell me something with this position?"

"Just the urge to be close to you," he smiled.

"That's a good answer," she ran her fingers along his collarbone.

"What's on your mind?"

"Hmm..." she looked thoughtful. "You."

"I missed these lazy moments," his hands caressed her bare thighs.

Alexis traced a scar on his shoulder, "Yeah?"

"You think about the future?" he asked.

"Lately, yes," Alexis nodded. "For a while there, it was just about getting through the day without falling apart."

"What do you think about when you look into that future?" he pressed.

"A change of address," Alexis smiled, "A few more people in the house."

"Castle isn't going to like you wanting to move."

"I don't care," Alexis shook her head.

"So where do you see this house being located?"

"Maybe Brooklyn or Long Island," Alexis considered. "But I think I'm going to have to convince my dad to move too."

"Why?"

"If we both get called out in the middle of the night, we need someone who can stay with the kids."

"We'll figure something out," he brushed her hair off her neck.

"Where'd you get this scar?" her fingers danced along the scar on his shoulder, "It's new."

"We got shot at, and I got grazed. It wasn't serious," Kevin shook it off.

"When?"

"About three years ago," Kevin shrugged. "Kate and your dad were visiting you in New Orleans."

"Did it hurt?" her lips trailed along the mark.

"Yes," Kevin admitted as his eyes shut halfway and a lazy grin graced his lips. "But right now, I can't remember how much."

"Any other new marks that I need to learn?" she asked.

"No visible ones," he said quietly.

"We're going to heal those non-visible ones slowly but surely," she pecked at his chest.

"What about you? Any marks I need to know about?"

"Well, I picked up some new ones quite recently," she frowned.

"Any others?" he asked as he trailed his fingers over the fabric covering the stab wounds that had recently been inflicted.

"No, I've got a few invisible scars, but that's it," Alexis admitted.

"Was pregnancy with Hunter difficult?" he asked.

"No, the actual pregnancy was pretty easy, but my hormones were so out of whack, it was crazy," Alexis shook her head. "I would cry over the silliest things. Chris thought it was hysterical."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. It was probably due to my already heightened emotional state, but I was a mess."

"You weren't the only one," he brought her lips to his.

"How bad were you?" Alexis asked softly.

"Pretty bad," he admitted, "Almost took a swing at Javi a couple of times, got drunk a lot..."

"Did you ever think about talking to someone?"

"Just the voices in my head," he shook his head, "There really wasn't anyone I could talk to about what I was going through."

"I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't changed my phone number," Alexis mused.

"I would have called you repeatedly until you changed your mind and came home."

"Or had you arrested for harassment," Alexis giggled.

"Would you really have had me arrested?" he pretended to be wounded by her teasing.

"Hmm...no," she shook her head before leaning in to kissed him.

"That food had better get here quickly before I get other ideas," he groaned.

"I've already got the idea. Do I have to draw you a picture?" she took his hand and slid it further up her leg.

Kevin groaned as he moved to lift the shirt off Alexis's body. He was just about to lay her out on the sofa when there was a knock at the door.

"Why does this keep happening to us?" Alexis sighed.

"In all fairness, we brought this one on ourselves by our need to eat," he chuckled while disentangled himself.

"Your wallet's on the counter," she called.

"Wrap up that pretty little body of yours with that blanket," he winked at her, "No sense giving the delivery person a free peek."

Alexis giggled as she wrapped the blanket around herself and then lay on stomach to watch Kevin walk to the door.

As the delivery person handed off their order, it was hard to miss how wet he was.

"It's coming down out there, isn't it?" Kevin commented.

"You have no idea," the boy ran a hand through his wet hair.

"Appreciate you delivering it so quickly. Me and the Mrs. are starving," Kevin responded.

Alexis bit her lip at his reference of her. She wondered if he'd said it on purpose or if it was a subconscious thing.

"No problem," the teenager said.

Kevin looked at the receipt and counted out the money and then handed the kid an extra twenty.

"Wait," the boy said.

"Life is good, Kid," Kevin smiled. "Be careful."

"Thanks, Sir," the boy pocketed the money quickly and then left before Kevin changed his mind about the fat tip he'd received..

"Dinner is served, milady," Kevin held up the plastic bag full of their treats.

"Counter," Alexis pointed with a smile when she got up from the couch, still wrapped in the blanket. "I'll get the plates."

"I stocked the fridge with ice tea and beer. Which do you prefer?" he asked.

"Iced tea. Do you want a glass?" Alexis asked.

"None for me," he pulled out a pitcher of tea for her and a beer for himself.

Alexis put the plates down with knives and forks before she grabbed herself a glass.

"We're not using chop sticks?"

"You can, but I'll have enough trouble keeping this blanket up."

"I wouldn't mind if it fell," he winked at her.

"I'm sure you wouldn't," Alexis giggled. "I did just take a shower. Getting sticky would require another one."

"I hate to break it to you, Babe," he leaned over and kissed her, "But you're going to be getting sticky all weekend if I have any say."

"You're a bad influence," Alexis shook her head.

"Yeah, I am," he kissed her again.

"But I love you anyway."

"I love you too."

=d=d=d=d=d=

Kevin shot up in bed breathing hard. He looked around him, recognized it in the dim moonlight. He jumped a little when he felt a hand wrap around his.

"Kev?"

"Alexis," he gave a breathless reply.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I'm just gonna get some water. Go back to sleep. I'll be right back."

"Are you sure?" she sat up with the blanket wrapped around her torso.

"I promise. I'm good," he slipped on some boxers and went out into the kitchen. He got a glass and filled it up. He drank half of it and then put it down. When he pulled his hand back he noticed it was shaking and immediately fisted it.

"You're not fine," she came out in his shirt that she was wearing earlier. "What's wrong?"

"Bad dream," he admitted.

"The fire?" she asked quietly.

"How'd you guess?" he turned towards her in surprise.

"You used to mumble about it sometimes in your sleep," Alexis said.

"It sneaks up on me sometimes," he replied when she wrapped her arms around him, "I'll be okay. Go back to bed."

"If it was me, would you leave me alone and just go back to sleep?"

"No," he frowned.

"Talk to me, Kev," she pressed her forehead to the back of his neck.

"It's been ten years and I can still feel everything I felt that night," he admitted. "It sneaks up on me and invades my sleep."

"I can't even imagine what went through your head that night," she felt herself getting choked up, "Then calling out the way you did on that phone, and having to say goodbye to those you loved knowing that you're wife was giving birth to a child you might never hold."

"If I'd died that night..."

"I know," she closed her eyes and saw Hunter.

"All the things that I would have missed out on," he swallowed a lump in his throat.

Alexis kissed the nape of his neck and then his shoulder blade.

"Not knowing what true happiness felt like," he continued on.

Alexis turned him around and then kissed his chest.

"Not knowing my soul mate," he looked deep into her eyes.

"Come back to bed," she took his hands.

"I'm not going to be able to sleep for awhile," he shook off her suggestion

"You don't have to," she shook her head. "You talk, I'll listen."

"I don't want to put these thoughts in your head," he frowned.

"You don't think I don't have my own," she challenged him, "I have my own life altering experiences to draw from, and I've found that it helps to talk through them."

"I know," he nodded. "But-"

"But nothing," Alexis shook her head. "Kev, you never have to hold back with me. I love you. I will be there as long as you let me. Talk to me."

"Okay," he allowed her to pull him back to bed.

Alexis lay across the bed and Kevin smiled, recognizing the prompt. He lay in the center of the bed, his head on her stomach.

He closed his eyes and allowed the scene that had awoken him to return. He could still smell the flames.

Alexis laid one hand on his shoulder and let the fingers of the other run through his hair.

He began narrating the tale to her, leaving nothing out. She gasped when he told her about waking to being pinned under the steel beam and how Javi had to help pry him out. She brushed away a tear when he came to the realization that he and Javi were going to die, and how he just fell asleep expecting to never wake again.

"But you did," she smiled a little. "You lived to see your daughter and another day."

"Someone was looking out for me that day," he nodded.

"Guardian angel," she agreed. "Then we found each other."

"To which I thank my lucky stars," he brought her hand to his lips.

"You have no idea," Alexis smiled through sudden tears.

"Lex?" he heard the hitch in her voice.

"You're alive and because of that Hunter exists," she said quietly.

Tears began to trail down Kevin's cheeks. He'd never allowed himself to go to that place, to imagine what might have happened if he hadn't pulled through on that fateful day.

"Kev?" Alexis lifted her head to look at him when it was so quiet.

"I love you, Alexis," he replied, "And there is not a day that goes by in which I will ever forget to tell you that again."

"Sit up," she nudged him. "We need some rules."

"Rules," he responded in confusion while he did as asked.

"Yes, you started it. Once a day, no matter what, we say 'I love you'."

"What other rules do you have in mind?" he asked.

"We never go more than twenty-fours without kissing each other," she smiled.

"I like these rules," he leaned over and kissed her.

"Your turn," she smiled.

"We...ah...don't go to bed angry, we don't go to bed with anyone but each other," he began rambling.

"Okay, so that means no sleeping in the car with Espo on stakeouts," she teased.

"Deal," he laughed.

"Okay, once a month we take twenty-four to thirty-six hours and be alone."

"We have a date night at least once a week," he added.

"I like that," Alexis agreed. "Oh! We also have to do a family night once a week; you, me, and the kids."

"Definitely," he replied, "Assuming our schedules allow it."

"And if they don't, we sic my dad on them for a family night."

"We promise to live happily ever after for at least the next fifty years."

"I'm good with that," Alexis nodded as she leaned forward to kiss him.

"We'd better try for some sleep," he relaxed against the pillows, "The sun is going to be up earlier than we'd like."

"You okay to sleep?"

"I think you chased out those nightmares for the night," he nodded while guiding her head to lay against his chest.

Alexis took his hand in hers and relaxed, his arm around her shoulders.

"I love you, Alexis," he kissed her forehead.

"I love you, too," she said quietly.

"Sleep well," he added

"Better dreams," she mumbled.

Soon they were both able to find peaceful sleep.


	48. Meanwhile back at the ranch-

"Those two owe us big time," Javi told Lanie while she whipped up a batch of hot cocoa for the children in the hopes that it would calm them down. It seemed to have been one drama after the other since the moment Castle and Beckett left.

"It's rained all weekend," Lanie pointed out. "They've got cabin fever."

"Who doesn't?" he groaned, "Next time Lex and Ryan go away for the weekend, we check the weather forecast before we agree to play house with them."

"We're lucky it hasn't been worse," she said. "Ian and Jamie tried to kill each other the weekend Kate took Jo away with her. Castle was handcuffed to the stairs when she came home."

"At least I wasn't tied to a chair this weekend," Javi conceded.

"There's still time," Lanie patted his chest.

"No giving them ideas," Javi grumbled.

"Ow! Maggie, let go of my hair," Sarah Grace shrieked.

"Why don't the two of you draw up welcome home signs for your parents?" Lanie separated the pair.

"She called me a brat," Maggie frowned before she whirled around and stomped into her mother's room.

"Sarah Grace, you're the older one. You're supposed to be setting a good example," Lanie scolded the girl.

"She's always following me around," Sarah Grace moaned, "I wanted to read my book in peace. She wouldn't leave me alone."

"Kiddo, remember she's younger and only has brothers," Javi said. "You being around is probably like Christmas for her."

"It's not like this at home, Uncle Javi," Sarah Grace sighed. "I'm used to being able to read in peace."

"Well, you do know that might change soon, right?"

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"He means that your dad might want to add some people to your family."

"What?" Sarah Grace gasped.

"It's not happening soon," Javi assured her. "But you do know that your dad loves Alexis, right?"

"Yeah, I know," she nodded.

"So, maybe you could try to tolerate Maggie a little better? She's a good kid," Javi smiled.

"Yeah, I guess," Sarah Grace kicked at the floor.

"In the meantime, why don't you go up to Maggie's room and read? I'll talk to her and convince her to give you some space," Lanie smiled.

"Okay," Sarah Grace nodded and left the room.

Lanie looked at Javi, "Go see what the boys are doing. It's alarmingly quiet up there. I'll talk to Maggie."

"Deal," Javi ambled off.

Lanie went into Alexis's room and frowned. There was no sign of Maggie. She was about to check the bathroom when the lump on the bed moved.

"I see you," Lanie poked at the lump.

"Go 'way," the muffled voice said.

"Come out, Sweetheart," Lanie replied, "I made some hot cocoa."

Maggie peeked out, "With marshmallows?"

"Yep," Lanie's head bobbed in agreement.

"Is Sarah Grace out there?"

"She's reading up in your room," Lanie replied.

"She was mean to me," Maggie came out further.

"She's just overwhelmed," Lanie stated, "She doesn't have any brothers like you do. She's not used to having to share anyone's time or her stuff."

"Hmph," Maggie frowned.

"I know it's difficult," Lanie replied, "It will get easier."

"Really?"

"Yep," Lanie nodded, "You just have to be patient and let Sarah Grace have some space."

"Okay," Maggie said. "But I don't like being patient."

"I know," Lanie laughed, "I'm not always good with it either."

"Can we have hot chocolate now?"

"Sure we can," Lanie held out her hand.

"Thanks, Aunt Lanie," Maggie smiled at her. Maggie eagerly hopped onto a stool to accept the cup of hot cocoa while Lanie called out the offer to the rest of the kids.

Cade came running down the stairs eagerly, "I want marshmallows!"

"And how do we ask?" Lanie said.

"May I have marshmallows?" Cade corrected himself.

"You may," Lanie smiled. "Take a seat."

Cade climbed into the chair next to his sister. Maggie repeatedly snuck several marshmallows into her mouth when Lanie's back was turned.

"Hello?" Alexis called out when she and Kevin came through the door.

"Mommy," Maggie jumped off her stool and bolted towards the front door. Her arms were around her mother's legs before another step could be taken.

"Hey, how's my Maggie Mae," Alexis scooped her up.

"I missed you, Mommy," Maggie pecked at Alexis's cheek repeatedly.

"I missed you, too. Did you have a good weekend?"

"It was okay," Maggie shrugged, "We couldn't go outside."

"I know," Alexis nodded. "Too much rain, huh?"

Maggie nodded, "It was stinky."

"I know," Alexis returned her daughter to her feet. "Did you behave for Lanie and Javi?"

"Yes," Maggie nodded with a too bright smile.

Alexis studied her daughter, "What happened?"

"Nothing," Maggie swayed where she stood.

"Okay," Alexis decided to let her off the hook for the moment. "Do I smell hot chocolate?"

"Yep, Lanie made it, and she put marshmallows in it," Maggie nodded.

"My favorite," Alexis smiled. "Did you save me some?"

"I don't know?" Maggie replied.

"Let's go find out, but first I think you're forgetting to say hi to someone," Alexis tilted her head towards Kevin.

"Hi," Maggie sent a quick wave.

"Hey, Maggie," Kevin knelt down. "How you doing?"

"Okay," Maggie replied, "Can we have hot chocolate before it gets cold?"

"Yeah, go ahead," Alexis said.

"That was a rather frosty greeting," Kevin rose to his feet and turned towards Alexis, "I thought you said she liked me."

"She does," Alexis said. "She likes hot chocolate more."

"How do I compete with that?" he chuckled.

"You don't, Darling. You learn to live with it," Alexis smiled.

"Hot chocolate sounds good," Kevin grasped her hands, "Let's see if Lanie made us any."

"Good idea. Maybe she'll tell us what happened."

"What makes you think something happened?" Kevin asked.

"I know Maggie's guilty smile."

"Hey, guys," Lanie greeted the pair eagerly, "How was the weekend retreat?"

"Wonderful," Alexis smiled. "Any hot chocolate left for us?"

"I think I made enough," Lanie confirmed.

"Where are Hunter, Sarah Grace, and Javi?"

"Upstairs," Lanie said and the stopped. "It's awfully quiet up there."

"I bet he ended up tied to another chair," Alexis snickered.

"I'll go find out," Kevin headed upstairs. When he got the game room, he doubled over in laughter. Javi was not only tied to the chair, he was gagged.

"Hi, Dad," Sarah Grace stopped mid knot to greet him.

"Javi, how do you keep ending up in this situation?" Kevin snorted.

He grunted and jerked his head, wanting his partner's help.

"No," Kevin smiled. "This is too good to ruin."

Kevin grabbed his phone from his pocket and snapped a few pictures, taking the time to send them to Kate and Rick before telling the kids they needed to untie his partner.

"Daddy, this is fun," Sarah Grace frowned.

"I can certainly understand the appeal, but play time is over," Kevin replied.

"Did you ever tie Uncle Javi up?" Sarah Grace asked.

"That's a conversation for another day," Kevin abruptly cleared his throat.

"Do we have to let him go?" Hunter asked.

"Yep," Kevin nodded.

"Rats," Hunter frowned but listened.

"You're going to get yours, Ryan," Espo stood toe to toe with Kevin once he was free.

"Hey, you leave Daddy alone, Uncle Javi," Sarah Grace got in between them and looked at Javi with a mean expression.

"I'm just playing, SG," Javi laughed.

"Come on guys," Kevin smiled. "Lanie made hot chocolate."

"I gotta stop playing nice when those kiddos are around," Javi followed his partner into the kitchen.

"Yes, you do," Kevin patted his shoulder.

"They gagged you didn't they?" Alexis asked when the men made their appearance.

"It's all in good fun," Javi shrugged.

"Yeah, for them," Alexis laughed.

Lanie snorted while she poured them some hot chocolate.

When the children's hot chocolate had been consumed, they ran off to do their own thing.

"How'd things go here?" Alexis asked once it was just the adults.

"Not bad," Lanie said. "Maggie and Sarah Grace had a little problem. Maggie likes having a big sister too much, but Sarah Grace isn't used to having an admirer follow her around all the time."

"I was wondering when something like that was going to happen," Alexis frowned.

"I think it'll blow over. It just takes some getting used to."

"Anything we need to address?" Kevin asked.

"Just preach patience to your girls."

"Yeah, we need to exercise that ourselves," Alexis replied, "Maybe this weekend away wasn't such a hot idea where the kids are concerned."

"You needed some time alone. There were two attempts on your life in less than three months," Lanie reminded her. "You both needed the reminder that they didn't work."

"Yeah, but we're parents first," Alexis stated.

"To be good parents, you need to decompress sometimes," Javi said.

"Says the man with no kids," Kevin smiled.

"Whatever, Bro," Javi rolled his eyes, "I just know that you needed some time away, but next time Lanie and I watch these kids, we're going to make sure it's a sunshine filled weekend. These kids went stir crazy."

"Deal," Kevin smiled. "Everything else was okay?"

"Yeah, everything is great," Javi nodded.

"Good," Alexis smiled. "You guys want dinner or to get the hell out of here? I know this wasn't your first choice for weekend plans."

"I never turning down dinner," Javi snorted, "You should know that by now."

"Pizza?" Alexis posed.

"Pizza sounds great," he nodded.

"Yeah, I agree," Lanie replied.

"Great," Alexis smiled. "Meat? Veggies? Fish?"

"No anchovies," Lanie said.

"Deal," Alexis laughed.

"I'll order," Kevin smiled.

"Thanks, Babe," Alexis pecked at his lips.

"Thank you for a wonderful weekend," he whispered in her ear, making her blush.

-d-d-d-d-d

Thanks for reading. Now do me a favor and reply!


	49. Chapter 32

The moment you have all been waiting for….

-d-d-d-d-d-

Alexis took a deep breath and opened the door to Hunter's room, "Hey, Honey. I need to talk to you."

Hunter was reading one of his newest comic books, a 'bribe' from Kevin he'd received a few days earlier in an attempt to get him to warm up to his mom's new boyfriend. "Sure, Mom, what's up?" he asked without looking up.

"I need your full attention," Alexis sat at the end of his bed with an envelope in her hand.

"Am I in trouble for something?" he asked. Whenever his mom had that serious tone, there was punishment involved. As far as he could remember, he hadn't done anything wrong.

"No, Sweetie, you haven't down anything wrong. The truth is, I'm the one who did something wrong a long time ago."

"If this is about you and Kevin, I already told you it's fine," Hunter resumed reading his comic book. Talking about his mom's boyfriend was the last thing he wanted to do.

"It is about Kevin, but it's about you and Kevin," Alexis said. "Hunter, I did something a long time ago that I shouldn't have done."

"I don't understand," Hunter set down the comic book and looked to her for further explanation.

"Here," Alexis handed him the envelope in her hand. "I want you to read this. It's a letter your dad wrote me in the event he died."

Hunter took out the handwritten letter and read through it once and then a second time, trying to make sense of the words.

"What does Dad mean about the man that gave me to you?" Hunter's voice quivered, "Am I adopted?"

"No, Baby, you're not adopted, but I was already pregnant when I met Christopher. He isn't your biological father."

"I don't know what that means," Hunter replied.

"It means someone else is your father, someone that I knew before I met Christopher," she tried to put it in simple terms an eight year old would understand.

"But he's my dad," Hunter frowned, "He's always been my dad."

"And he loved you, Baby," Alexis brushed tears out of her eyes, "He loved you so much, and he was so proud that you called him 'dad'."

"But if he's not my…who is?" Hunter asked.

"Before I moved to New Orleans, I was involved with Kevin," Alexis admitted.

"I don't…" Hunter frowned again.

"Remember how I knew Uncle Javi and Lanie before I moved to New Orleans? Well, I knew Kevin too. He and I were…well, to keep it PG, we dated, we…god, I can't even say this. Kevin is your father."

"No," Hunter shook his head. "No."

"Hunter, please just listen to me," Alexis said.

"No!" Hunter ran out of his room, throwing the comic book in the waste basket on his way out. A few seconds later Alexis heard the door to the game room slam shut.

-d-d-d-

" _Hello?"_

"Daddy?"

" _Alexis,"_ Castle heard the agony in her voice immediately, _"Is everything alright?"_

"No," Alexis leaned against the wall of the balcony outside her bedroom. "I told Hunter about his real father, and now he won't come out of the game room. My son hates me."

" _Did you want me to talk to him?"_ Castle offered immediately.

"I don't know," Alexis shook her head miserably. "Maggie and Cade just asked me why the door was locked on the game room. I don't even know where to start in explaining all of this to them."

" _I'm on my way,"_ Castle put an end to the discussion, _"Hunter doesn't hate you. I'm sure he's just upset. You had already anticipated his reaction."_

"I know, but anticipating and actually being on the receiving end are two completely different things," Alexis felt the tears welling in her eyes.

" _I'll bring Kate and the kids. The kids will keep Cade and Maggie entertained, and you and Kate can talk."_

"I don't want to talk," Alexis shook her head.

" _Then you can stare at each other,"_ Castle said. _"We'll let ourselves in. Do me a favor? Before we get there, call Kevin."_

"Why?" Alexis asked, "If Hunter won't talk to me, he certainly won't talk to Kevin."

" _No, but you need to talk to Kevin."_

"This is such a disaster," Alexis sighed, "I don't want to bring Kevin into this."

" _He's Hunter's father, and he's your..."_ Castle trailed off before he said the word on the tip of his tongue. He simply couldn't say 'lover'. _"He's your confidante."_

"Okay," Alexis conceded. She knew her dad was trying to accept her relationship with his good friend. "I'll see you soon."

" _I love you, Alexis."_

"I love you, too."

Alexis hung up with her father and dialed Kevin.

" _Hello?"_

"Hey, Handsome," Alexis smiled slightly, her voice quivered slightly.

" _Hey, Lex, how's it going? Did you talk to Hunter yet?"_

"He's locked in the game room right now," Alexis confessed, "No surprise. He hates me."

" _Oh, Lex, I'm sorry,"_ Kevin winced. She sounded devastated. _"What can I do?"_

"Nothing right now," Alexis replied, "I called my dad. He's coming over to talk to Hunter."

" _Okay, Hunter's taken care of. What can I do for you?"_

"Build a time machine so I can go back and tell myself not to get on the plane to New Orleans when I first left."

" _How about I come over?"_ Kevin offered, _"I'll let you cry on my shoulder."_

"I love you for the offer, but I think you being here right now would make things worse."

Kevin played with the snow globe on his mother's coffee table, _"Lex, I'm sorry."_

"For what? You didn't cause this. I did."

" _Well, I am partially responsible,"_ Kevin countered, _"It was my..."_

"Don't say sperm," Alexis cut him off, "I don't want that image in my head right now."

" _Okay, I won't say it,"_ he hid the chuckle that wanted to escape.

"Where are you right now?"

" _My mom's living room, why?"_

"Just trying to get a mental picture," Alexis admitted. "It makes it easier to pretend you're here."

" _Are you sure you don't want me there?"_ he offered a second time, _"I can stay out of Hunter's sight."_

"So what? You're going to play hide and seek?"

" _I just want to be there for you,"_ Kevin smiled.

"I know," she replied, "Maybe in a couple of days."

" _Call me anytime, you promise?"_

"I will," she stated, "I love you, Kevin."

" _I love you too,"_ he responded instantly.

"I better go. Cade and Maggie will be wondering what happened to me."

" _I mean it, Lex, day or night,"_ Kevin offered just before the hung up.

"I know," Alexis nodded.

Alexis could hear Maggie's anxious voice from the living room. Her father, stepmother and siblings must have arrived.

"Hey, Alexis," Kate immediately went to give her stepdaughter a hug, "You alright?"

"Hi," Alexis returned the hug. "Not really."

"Come on, you and me, on the balcony," Kate immediately steered her back to her bedroom, "Castle has Hunter. The kids can entertain themselves with a movie."

Alexis sat down on the ground, "Thanks for coming over."

"Of course," Kate took up the space next to her and put an arm around her shoulder, "Want to talk?"

"No," Alexis shook her head.

"Did you call Kevin?"

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I so wish he could be here right now."

"I know, Bud," Kate replied, "What did Hunter say when you gave him the news?"

"He said no a lot," Alexis frowned.

"He does denial well," Kate nodded. "I used to think he got it from your dad. I'm starting to rethink that."

Alexis shook her head, "I was so stupid and wrong for so long. Look what it caused. My son hates me. I don't know why you and Javi talk to me at all. Some part of me thinks Kevin is going to sue me for custody, and I'll never see him or Hunter again."

"We both know that won't ever happen," Kate assured her, "He loves you."

"What about you and Javi? Why don't you two hate me for him?"

"Because we know you," Kate brushed a piece of hair behind Alexis's ear, "We know your heart. We know you'd never do anything to intentionally hurt someone you love."

Alexis leaned her head on Kate's shoulder, "You're a better mom than mine ever was. I love you, Kate."

"I love you too, Bud," Kate beamed with pride, "Hunter will come around. This is all a shock to him like it was to us."

"How mad were you when you found out the whole story?" Alexis asked.

"Wringing Kevin's neck was a definite possibility," Kate nodded.

"But what about me?" Alexis asked, "You had to be mad at me too."

"I was, but not because you lied. I was mad because you didn't think you could trust us to help you with Hunter or Kevin to keep Sarah Grace."

"Is that it?" Alexis asked, "You were mad I left with Kevin's child, what about carrying on an affair with him? You could have thought of me as a slut and a whore, and you would have been right."

"At the time I found out, you were fighting for your life. I wasn't allowing negative thoughts of you to even enter my mind, and no matter what, I never would have thought of you as a slut or a whore. You were someone who made a mistake," Kate replied, "I wasn't perfect either."

"Did you sleep with a married man?"

"I lied to your father for a year," Kate admitted. "Who am I kidding? I lied to your father for years about how I felt about him. It took getting tossed off a building to make me realize that if I didn't have him, my life was going to be an empty shell."

"That doesn't count," Alexis frowned, "You were just scared about whether or not my dad felt the same way."

"Well, there was the entire being married to someone for years and not even knowing it," Kate replied, "That could have been downright ugly if I hadn't known until after I married your dad."

"I'm glad your dad didn't find out," Alexis snorted. "That could've been seriously ugly."

"I was younger than you were when you started seeing Kevin," Kate replied.

"Do you think I slept with Kevin because I was young and naïve?" Alexis asked.

"No," Kate shook her head. "Lex, you have a good heart, and it chose Kevin."

"The first time he touched me was when he guided me back to the table the night Dad got that writing award. I could still feel it after it was gone."

"Yeah, I know how that goes...with your dad, I mean, not Kevin. God, he's always been like a little brother to me," Kate explained.

"The sparks really hit me at the July 4th party. I was playing on the beach with Sarah Grace, and when I sat up he brushed some sand off of my face. Kate, I felt it all the way to my toes."

"I remember feeling that with Castle too," Kate fondly recalled her courtship with Rick.

"I tried avoiding him after that, but he tracked me down and made me talk to him," Alexis admitted.

"You don't need to explain yourself to me or anyone else," Kate replied, "It all happened, but it's working itself out."

"Sometimes I feel like all the bad stuff that has happened to me is punishment for those poor choices I made," Alexis admitted.

"No," Kate shook her head. "Never."

"Thanks," Alexis smiled.

"Would you do anything with you and Kevin differently? Besides the way it ended," Kate amended.

"I don't know," Alexis sighed heavily, "I've gone over and over all of it, trying to pick out exactly where I would have done things differently, but I can't find it."

"I knew Kevin was in a bad way for a long time, but I never put it together with your leaving," Kate frowned. "Guess I'm not such a great detective."

"Or maybe it's because he's such a good detective that you never found out," Alexis offered.

"Okay, let's go at it from that angle," Kate said. "Do you think Kevin would change what happened with you and him?"

"You mean except the part about me leaving?" Alexis clarified, "No, I don't think so. I think he was ready to end his marriage when I left, but when I walked away…"

"When you were forced away," Kate amended.

"I hurt him, Kate," tears tumbled down Alexis's cheeks.

"You hurt yourself, too," Kate reminded her. "You really think I didn't know that you were sobbing every time I called to check in for the first three months?"

"Kevin always said I was a bad liar."

"Your dad was so worried," Kate recalled. "He wanted to go down there and make you move home."

"That would have been bad," Alexis replied, "He would have known I was pregnant, and he would have drug me back and forced me to tell him who the father was. Kevin would be six feet under, and you and I would be single parents to two young boys. There would be no Jamie or Jo or Cade or Maggie."

Kate laughed, "Honey, your dad loves you. He would've respected your wishes when it came to Kevin."

"Before I was stabbed I met Kevin in the park. We were going to have dinner and talk. We ended up in a fight instead."

"I'm betting there were a few fights before he was completely accepting of everything," Kate replied.

"It's not the fight, it's what he said. He told me I should've come home. We could've worked it out. We could've been a family."

"He's not wrong about any of that," Kate replied.

"I still have this horrible image of him finding out Jenny had taken Sarah Grace and run."

"We would have found them," Kate replied, "We would have left no stone unturned. There is no place that Jenny could have taken Sarah Grace that we couldn't have found her and brought them home."

"But until things calmed down and you convinced my dad not to murder Kevin, we would've lost all of you."

"Your dad would have been mad, but there isn't anything in this world you could do to drive him away for more than a day," Kate replied.

"Me, yes," Alexis shook her head. "But Kevin? Dad's still calming down now."

"They're getting back to what they were," Kate assured her, "It hasn't been all that long."

"Kate, can I tell you something and have you not tell Dad?"

"Uh, okay," Kate responded with a nervous hitch in her voice.

"I left for all the reasons I said. I didn't want to force Kevin's hand, or lose you guys, or have him lose his daughter, but there's one more thing. Jenny scared the hell out of me the night she told me to stay away from Kevin."

"Considering what she did in the end, your fears were justified," Kate replied.

"I'll say," Kevin's voice said from the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt."

"What are you doing here?"

"I was worried about you," Kevin admitted.

"You didn't have to come," Alexis quickly rose to her feet and tossed her arms around his neck.

"Yes, I did," he smiled.

"I'm gonna go make the kids some popcorn," Kate excused herself.

Alexis hugged Kevin a second time once they were alone. She was so grateful he went against her spoken wishes and came over.

=d=d=d=d=d=d=

Rick got to the top of the stairs and after a short internal debate he sat down on the floor next to the door.

"Hunter, it's me," Rick spoke out loud enough so his grandson could hear him. "You in there? Or did you go Spiderman on us and scale the building?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Hunter said from the other side of the door.

"Okay, we don't have to," Rick nodded. "But you know you're not the only one who's mad."

"Why are you mad?" Hunter asked.

"Your mom lied to me and so did Kevin," Rick said. "Two people I trusted more than anything lied to me for a very long time."

"It's not the same," Hunter replied.

"Not completely," Rick agreed, "But it's still a lie."

"Grandpa, how come you don't have a dad?" Hunter asked.

"I do. He just couldn't be a dad."

"So if Dad wasn't my dad, what was he?" Hunter frowned.

"Chris was your dad," Rick told him. "He loved you and your mom. One of the proudest days of his life was the day you were born."

"But he's not…" Hunter began.

"Biologically, no he was not your father, but he chose to be your dad because he loved you. In a way, you're very lucky. You have two people who want to be your dad," Rick smiled slightly.

"I miss him," Hunter sounded teary.

"I know you do," Rick nodded. "I miss him too. So does your mom."

"Does she?" Hunter asked, "Her and Kevin are together already."

"Buddy, your mom thinks of your dad every day," Rick smiled.

"Doesn't seem like it," Hunter huffed.

"She loved your dad," Rick responded, "It hurts everyday that he's gone, but she has a chance to be happy again. I know Chris would have wanted that."

"Is he a good guy?"

"Kevin? Yeah, he is one of the best people I know."

"Does he love Mom?"

Rick was silent for a moment before he answered, "Yes, he does."

"If he loved her back then, why did she leave?" Hunter asked.

"That is complicated," Rick replied.

"Is this one of those things I'll understand when I'm older?" Hunter's frown was very plain in his words.

"I'm afraid so, Bud," Rick replied.

"Did he know about me?"

"No," Rick shook his head. "If he had, he wouldn't have let your mom go. He would've gone after her."

"I don't want a new dad," Hunter replied, "I want my dad back."

"I know," Rick shook his head. "Kevin doesn't want to replace Christopher. He wants his own place in your life."

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," Hunter announced.

"Okay. You coming out of there anytime soon?"

"No," he responded.

"I can pick the lock, you know," Rick stated. "So can your mom and Kate and Kevin."

"But you won't," Hunter said. "None of you will."

"How do you know that?"

"Because you know it's better to let me come to you instead of forcing me to talk," Hunter announced.

Rick frowned, "You sound just like your mother."

"No, I don't," Hunter replied.

"She always won our arguments by using logic," Rick smiled.

Hunter unlocked the door and hugged his grandfather around the waist.

"I know it hurts, Buddy, but you've got a lot of people who love you like crazy," Rick hugged his grandson.

"Do I have to see him?" Hunter asked.

"No, you don't have to see Kevin if you don't want to, but he loves your mom and wants to be in her life," Rick shook his head.

"Well, I don't want to see him yet," Hunter amended.

"He'll wait until you're ready. He's a patient man."

"Good," Hunter wiped at his eyes.

"Why don't you go wash up?"

"Okay," Hunter nodded.

"Then pick a book. We'll read together until you fall asleep."

"Okay," Hunter replied, "I'm gonna talk to Mom first."

"Wash up first, okay?"

Hunter ran off.

Rick went downstairs and found his daughter, wife, and Kevin in the kitchen.

"I thought I heard the door," Rick said. "Kevin, get out."

"What? Castle, are you serious?" Kevin stammered out in surprise, "I thought we got past all of this already."

"We are, but Hunter isn't," Rick said. "He'll be downstairs in about two minutes."

"You got him out of the game room?" Alexis looked to her father gratefully.

"Yeah," Rick smiled.

"Dad, I love you," Alexis hugged him before turning towards Kevin. "Kevin, unfortunately he's right."

"I'm gone. Call me tomorrow."

"Night, Kevin," Alexis hugged him before he left.

"Night," Kevin slipped out the door quietly.

"You want us to stick around?" Rick asked.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I'm not too old to admit that I need my dad."

"Good," Rick replied, "I wasn't leaving anyways."

"I'm sleeping in Alexis's room with her. You're on the couch," Kate told her husband and then turned towards the children she knew were eavesdropping just around the corner. "Guys, let's go find some pajamas for you."

"Awe," Maggie and Cade groaned.

"I know, I know," Kate nodded. "Let's go. Ian, Jamie, Jo, go get the extra blankets and pillows for yourselves."

The five kids moped out of the room.

"Do you want something to drink, Dad?"

"I'm good," Rick stated, "Hunter is washing up, and then he wants to talk to you."

"He hates me," Alexis groaned while burying her head in her hands.

"He doesn't hate you," Rick said. "Come on, Alexis. How many fights did we have?"

"Too many," Alexis admitted.

"Did you ever hate me?"

"Close," Alexis nodded and then smiled a little.

"He's upset at the situation," Castle replied, "That's entirely different."

"I know," Alexis nodded. "Did you know Chris wanted me to tell Kevin the truth? He started trying to convince me around the time Cade was born that I needed to let Kevin know he had another kid."

"Why didn't you?" Rick asked.

"Because I was terrified of how it would turn out," Alexis admitted. "I've never stopped loving Kevin, Dad."

"And you thought letting Kevin back into your life would…"

"Ruin my marriage," Alexis nodded. "I loved Chris too. I still do."

"But?"

"I didn't want to split myself in two."

"You don't have to explain yourself to me," Rick replied, "I've made my own mistakes."

"If I'd had to chose, I don't know who it would have been," Alexis admitted, "What does that say about me?"

"That you were in love with them both and didn't want to hurt either of them," Rick nodded. "Kevin would've come after you if he'd known."

"You don't know for sure," Alexis shook her head, "He doesn't even know for sure. Maybe what I was really afraid of having given Kevin the chance, he wouldn't have come after me."

"He would've," Rick took her hand. "There's not a doubt in my mind. Looking back, he didn't do as good a job at pretending he was okay as he thought he did."

"Neither of us did," Alexis replied.

"True," Rick nodded. "I was about two days from jumping on a plane when you started talking about Christopher."

"It was like waking up from a bad dream the day I met him," Alexis admitted, "I don't think I would have gotten through it all without him."

"I wasn't thrilled when you married him," Rick admitted.

"Because he was a cop or because was from Alabama, lived in New Orleans, and had no interest in moving north of the Mason Dixon line?"

"It was probably that he had no interest in returning my daughter to New York," Rick smiled, "I missed you so much."

"I missed you, too, Daddy," Alexis smiled.

"Mom," Hunter came into the kitchen.

"Hey, Bud," Alexis smiled weakly.

He ran up to her and hugged her around the middle. Alexis hugged him back tightly.

"I'm still mad at you," Hunter said.

"I know, and I'm so sorry," Alexis replied.

Hunter looked up at her and like always, Alexis could see Kevin looking back at her.

"You have to know I love you more than my own life, okay? So did Chris and so does Kevin," Alexis told him.

"I know," he nodded.

"Good," Alexis nodded. "Do you want anything? You've got a good opening for a root beer float."

"No," Hunter shook his head, "I'm not hungry. I'm going to get ready for bed."

"Okay, but I think I'm going to have a purple cow. Dad, you want one?"

"No," Rick replied, "I was going to read with Hunter."

"A purple cow?" Hunter asked hopefully.

"Oh, it sounds like that story is going to wait," Alexis gave a wide smile, "Did you want one, Hunter?"

"Yes, please," Hunter smiled.

"Coming right up," Alexis ruffled his hair before turning to make the treat.

"I'll take one, too," Rick smiled before he patted the stool next to him and Hunter hopped up.

"Does Kevin like purple cows?" Hunter asked.

"I don't know," Alexis frowned. "He does like zucchini and chocolate chip muffins."

"My favorite," Hunter smiled.

"It's kinda spooky how much alike you two are," Alexis replied.

"Mom, are you gonna marry him?"

"That's a good question," Rick smiled.

"It's something I think about sometimes," Alexis admitted.

"So is that a yes?" Hunter asked.

"That's a maybe," Alexis stated, "It's complicated. Kevin is still technically married to his first wife."

"Sarah Grace says she's in jail," Hunter frowned in confusion.

"She is, but she won't let Kevin divorce her."

"Sarah Grace is my sister now, isn't she?" Hunter just realized.

"Yeah, you've got an older sister."

"I kinda liked being the oldest," he frowned.

"You're still my oldest," Alexis countered.

"That's good," Hunter nodded.

The trio ate in silence for several minutes. Alexis wanted Hunter to take the lead in any discussions they had, but she knew he was going to be a bit stubborn about accepting the news about his real father.

"Grandpa, can we still read a book?" Hunter asked.

"Absolutely," Rick replied, "Anything you want."

"Why don't you two go up and read? I'll clean up."

"Okay," Hunter hopped off the stool and went to hug Alexis, "Night, Mom."

"Night, Baby," Alexis smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too," he called out while running off.

"Night," Rick smiled.

"Night, Dad."

Alexis cleaned up and then went into her room. She got into bed and dialed her phone.

 _"Hey,"_ Kevin smiled.

"Hey," Alexis responded softly.

 _"How are you?"_

"Okay," Alexis said. "Hunter's talking to me."

 _"I figured he'd come around pretty quick,"_ Kevin replied, _"He's a smart boy."_

"Yeah," Alexis agreed. "I have no idea where he gets it from."

 _"Has to be from his amazing mother,"_ Kevin stated.

"You've got a pretty good mind, too," Alexis smiled.

 _"I wish I could be there for you tonight,"_ Kevin sighed.

"Me too," Alexis sneaked a peek at the door and listened for Kate. It was silent. "Do you ever think about the time we had the loft to ourselves? There was a horrible storm outside and we sat in front of the fire with sheets covering us?"

 _"Oh yeah,"_ he chuckled, _"That was an amazing weekend."_

"We stayed up all night just talking," Alexis smiled.

 _"Amongst other things."_

Alexis turned the color of her hair and suddenly felt very hot, "Don't do that."

 _"Don't do what?"_ he asked.

"You know what," Alexis giggled as she got out of bed and walked over to the balcony doors. "And you do it so well."

 _"Why Dr. LaSalle, am I making you blush?"_ he teased.

"I need a cold shower. Does that answer your question?"

 _"And now so do I,"_ he groaned.

"Rain check," she replied, "Maybe we can arrange a sleepover at my Dad's some night soon. You and I can have the place to ourselves, and maybe give this hot tub a bit of a work out."

" _That'd be nice,"_ Kevin agreed. _"I have to ask you something though."_

"Okay."

" _You and Lanie were talking about the most public place you'd ever had sex the other night. You said it was Martha's studio."_

"Right."

" _Did you ever…in the morgue?"_

"Dr. Wade would've had my ass and King would have had Christopher's," Alexis shook her head.

 _"Is that a no?"_ he baited her.

"That's a no."

 _"We should change that."_

"Lanie would kill us."

 _"If she finds out,"_ Kevin amended.

"When have you ever been able to hide something like that from Javi?"

 _"I did keep our affair a secret for eight years,"_ he reminded her.

"Okay, picture this: we use our lunch hour to break in a gurney. You go back to work with a grin that won't quit. Javi, who for some reason always knows when you get lucky, figures out what you were doing, and where you were doing it. He tells Lanie, because he can't keep his mouth shut. Lanie has a fit."

 _"Then we'll just have to do it on a day in which I won't see Javi,"_ Kevin laughed.

"You're such a guy sometimes," Alexis shook her head in amusement.

" _I just want to see you naked,"_ Kevin smiled.

"I stand by my original statement," she giggled.

 _"I hate to do this, but I just got to my mom's,"_ Kevin sighed, _"I'll call you first thing in the morning."_

"I love you, Kevin. Sweet dreams," Alexis said.

" _I love you, Lex. Sleep well,"_ Kevin replied.

They both disconnected with a contented sigh.

=d==d=d=d=dd=

 _Alexis,_

 _If you're reading this, then I'm gone. I'm not gonna lie. That sucks._

 _I hope it's at the ripe old age of a hundred, and I choked on a cheeseburger. If it's before that and in the line of duty, I hope it happened for a good reason, and that I didn't do something stupid to get myself killed. No matter how it happens, there are a few things I want to say to you._

 _As I write this, I'm watching you sleep soundly in our bed. It's our wedding night. I've just looked in on Hunter. He's safely tucked into bed._

 _Our wedding day will likely be happiest day of my life. I never knew that loving someone could be so simple. Being with you and Hunter has made my life feel complete, and I can only hope that you and I are blessed with more children who are as wonderful as that little boy you've given me the honor of calling my son._

 _I want you to promise me something, Darling. I want you to mourn me. I will leave it up to you in how long that lasts, whether it's 2 days, 2 months, 2 years or 2 decades, only you will know what works for you. Once you're done, I want you to find the man who gave us Hunter. I want you to find him and fight for him. I want you to be a family with him. I want Hunter to know him for who he really is, and any children that you and I have, I want them to know that I'd be okay with them calling him dad._

 _I love you, Darling, and no matter where I am I will be watching over you and smiling._

 _Chris_

=d=d=d=d=

So, how'd we do?


	50. Chapter 33

First – Thanks for all the replies. You guys are beyond awesome. Please keep it up.

Second – We figured it was Alexis's turn in the hot seat. Guess who's coming to dinner?

-d-d-d-d-d-

"Mommy! Look what Pop-Pop gave me," Maggie proudly showed off her bouquet of daisies.

"Those are very nice, Mags," Alexis gave her daughter an amused smiled, "Did you thank Pop-Pop for them?"

"Yes, I did," Maggie nodded.

Alexis looked towards Jim to get confirmation before adding, "You and Pop-Pop have fun. Be good for him, and don't stay out too late."

"I will, Mommy," Maggie promised.

"I'll put these in your room. Remember to stay with Pop-Pop at all times, okay?"

"Yep," the little girl nodded as she took Jim's hand, "Bye, Mommy."

"Bye, Sweetie," Alexis smiled. "Jim, thanks again."

"Thank you for the tickets and the beautiful date," Jim smiled.

Maggie waved when she and Jim left. Alexis couldn't help the laugh that bubbled to the surface. "Mags could do worse for her first date."

Her phone tweeted, and she smiled at the picture her father had sent of her sons, brothers, and Javi at the stadium. They all had crazy grins.

The timer on the stove dinged to announce the appetizers she'd prepared were ready to come out of the oven. She quickly scurried into the kitchen.

She set the pan on the counter to cool and then checked on the main course. It looked right.

She picked up her cell phone anyway.

" _Hello?"_

"Kate? What's it supposed to look like again?"

" _The cheese should be bubbling on top,"_ Kate replied, _"Stop worrying. The dish is nearly impossible to screw up."_

"I hope she likes it."

" _You mean you hope she likes you?"_ Kate asked.

"Stop being insightful. It's creepy," Alexis frowned.

" _Alexis, stop worrying. She's going to love you, especially when she sees how happy you make her son,"_ Kate assured her.

"I kept her grandson from her for eight years. How is she going to forgive that?"

" _You also made sure her husband saw him before he died,"_ Kate reminded her. _"That's going to mean something to her."_

"This is going to be a disaster," Alexis frowned, "It's like an accident on the side of the road. I can see it coming, yet I can't turn away."

" _It is not. You have a dessert, right?"_

"Kevin's bringing it."

" _The wine?"_

"Already breathing," Alexis nodded.

" _You have it all fully under control,"_ Kate assured her.

"You had it lucky," Alexis sighed, "Gram already loved you before you dated Dad."

" _True, but my dad and Martha didn't love each other. The first dinner the four of us had together was a disaster."_

"They grew to like each other."

" _You're going to be fine,"_ Kate repeated herself.

"What are you and Jo doing tonight?" Alexis asked, "Maybe you could join us as buffers."

" _Jo and I are going to Serendipity,"_ Kate smiled. _"If you are in dire straits, text me 9-1-1, and I will call with an excuse that I am locked out of my car."_

"That is genius," Alexis heard a knock at the door. "Expect a text in about five minutes."

" _Alexis, give it a chance,"_ Kate told her.

"I better go," Alexis stated after taking a deep breath. "They're here. Wish me luck."

" _Good luck, but you're not going to need it,"_ Kate smiled.

Alexis put her phone down on the counter and ran to the door. She took a deep breath and opened it, "Hi."

"Hey, Babe," Kevin greeted her with an anxious smile. "Lex, this is my mom, Bridget. Mom, this is my Alexis."

"Hi," Alexis repeated herself with a nervous biting of her lip.

"Something smells wonderful," Bridget commented.

"Yeah, it's in the- Oh come in," Alexis realized they were still standing in the hall.

"Relax," Kevin whispered in her hair when she stepped back to allow them in.

"I need a parent you haven't met yet," Alexis decided.

"Why?"

"Because then you would realize how futile it is to tell me to relax right now."

"You're going to be fine," he laughed while handing her the dessert his mother had made for their evening.

"I thought you were picking something up," Alexis frowned, "I'm sorry, Mrs. Ryan. You didn't have to bake."

"Bridget," the woman corrected her, "It's no trouble. I like to bake. Don't worry."

"It looks delicious," Alexis smiled. "I'll put it in the fridge. Can I get you a glass of wine?"

"Yes, please," Bridget replied.

"Kev? Wine? Beer?"

"I'll give you a hand," Kevin followed her into the kitchen.

Alexis quickly put the dessert in the fridge and went about preparing Bridget's drink. She nearly dropped the wine glass when she went to pour.

"Lex," Kevin took the glass from her and then the bottle. He put his hands on her shoulders, "It's going to be fine."

"What if she doesn't like me?" Alexis began to panic, "Moms never like the wives of their sons. Chris's mom never warmed up to me."

"Lex, she's going to love you," Kevin smiled.

"All I can think is that she loved Jenny first," Alexis sighed. "Me? I'm just some home wrecker who kept her grandson from her for eight years."

"Lex, you were not a home wrecker," he caressed her shoulders, "The issues with me and Jenny predate you. She knows that."

"And the Hunter part of the story?"

"She knows why you had to leave and what Jenny threatened to do," he added. "You were in an impossible position."

"Why am I so nervous?" Alexis sighed.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out," he pecked at her cheek, "Even if she doesn't love you, which I highly doubt, it won't matter because I love you."

Alexis put her arms around his neck, "Has anyone ever told you that you're pretty wonderful, Kevin Ryan?"

"You, on multiple occasions. I think we've made my mom wait for that glass of wine long enough, don't you think," he teased, "Did you want me to pour, or do you think you can manage?"

"You pour, I'll put the appetizers on a plate," Alexis rolled her eyes.

"Those appetizers don't have nuts, do they? My mom is allergic," Kevin replied.

"What!" Alexis gasped, "Are you serious?"

"Lex, I told you-"

"Ten times. I remember," Alexis giggled. "Now who's freaking out?"

He was still chuckling when he carried his mother's drink out to her.

"What's so funny?" Bridget asked.

"I was just getting a little payback for Kevin's teasing," Alexis explained. "Please help yourself."

"These smell delicious," Bridget took a small plate and helped herself.

"It's my stepmother's recipe," Alexis set the dish on the coffee table.

"Kate? She's a wonderful cook," Bridget commented.

"She learned from her mother," Alexis smiled.

"And your mother?" Bridget asked, "Did she teach you?"

"No, my mother could burn water if she tried hard enough. My dad's a good cook though."

"What does your mother do?" Bridget inquired, "Is she a writer like your father?"

"Actress," Alexis corrected.

"I see," Bridget replied, "Does she live here in New York?"

"L.A.," Alexis replied, "She's more of a west coast gal. I don't get to see her much."

"That's too bad."

"I never really had a chance to miss her," Alexis shook her head. "My dad and Gram were always there. Always."

"Kevin spoke very highly of your grandmother. She sounded like an amazing woman," Bridget replied.

"She was," Alexis smiled at Kevin. "She adored your son. She thought he was a good man."

"He tries to be," Bridget nodded, "So tell me more about yourself. Kevin says you're a doctor?"

"I am. I'm a Medical Examiner for the city," Alexis nodded. "I used to be one in Jefferson Parish."

"Yes, he mentioned that. Do you miss New Orleans?"

"Some of it," Alexis replied, "There are certain things that I could do without, but I used to say the same about New York when I wasn't living here."

"Did you go to Mardi Gras?" Bridget asked.

"I did, yes," Alexis smiled. "The boys loved it. Maggie was a little young to get into it, but Cade would go nuts every year making necklaces. He and Chris used to make them in green and blue."

"And why those colors?" Bridget asked.

"They're Tulane's colors. I went to medical school there."

"How ever did you manage to complete medical school while raising a family?" Bridget asked.

"I had some help," Alexis admitted.

"Your husband?"

"And his boss's daughter," Alexis nodded. "Also, the computer expert at NCIS was good with kids."

"Now that's Navy law enforcement right?" Bridget asked, "Was your husband in the Navy?"

"No, but being Navy isn't a pre-requisite for NCIS the way it is for JAG. Chris was a deputy with the sheriff's department before Katrina. He joined NCIS after his boss saved his life."

"That's the one they call King?" Bridget asked.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "He delivered Hunter."

"I see," Bridget replied. "How did that come about?"

"We were stuck in the NCIS office when your grandson decided he needed to make his entrance," Alexis smiled. "The city was on lockdown because of some political visit. There was no getting to a hospital in time. Chris held my hand and let me curse at him while King delivered my son."

"Sounds like a very handy man to have around in trying times," Bridget replied, "You have two other children. Were they born in hospitals?"

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "Maggie's my baby. That's her in the picture next to you."

"She's a cutie," Bridget picked up the picture to examine it, "How old is she?"

"Four," Alexis replied, "She's on a date tonight with Pop-Pop. That's what she calls Kate's dad."

"Where are the boys?" Kevin asked.

"Dad and Javi took them and my brothers to a baseball game."

"That's a shame," Bridget frowned while she returned the picture, "I was hoping to be able to meet Hunter."

"Maybe next time," Alexis vowed. "He's still processing the news about Kevin being his father."

"Of course. Alexis, I want to thank you," Bridget began.

"Uh, okay," Alexis looked at Kevin in question.

"I know that seems like a silly thing for me to be saying the first time we meet," Bridget added, "I've never seen my son as happy as I have in the past few weeks. I'm pretty sure a lot of that is because of you."

"He makes me happy, too. Even when he pisses me off, he makes me happy," Alexis smiled.

"I also want to thank you for making sure my husband met his son's son before he died."

"Of course," Alexis replied, "I knew what Kevin's father meant to him."

There was an awkward pause before Alexis added. "That reminds me. I made copies of the picture that I took of the two of them. I wanted you to have one."

"Thank you," Bridget smiled.

Alexis got up and went to her office.

Kevin smiled at his mother, "Thank you."

"For what, Dear?" Bridget asked her son.

"You could be a lot harder on her than you are."

"There is no point in dwelling on the past," Bridget replied, "What's done is done. We must move forward, and it is quite clear she will be a part of your life for a long time."

Kevin smiled, "I'm planning on it."

Bridget took a quick peek behind her before she turned to her son, "When you ask her, I have your grandmother's ring if you want it."

"You have that?" Kevin's eyes went wide. "Why did you never offer it before?"

"Mother's intuition," Bridget smiled. "I tried to picture it on Jenny's finger, and I never could."

"She probably wouldn't have appreciated it anyways," Kevin conceded, "She was very particular in the type of ring she wanted, and it wasn't a family heirloom."

"When you want it, you let me know," Bridget smiled.

"I might take you up on that," he replied just before Alexis re-entered the room with an envelope of pictures that she was handing to Kevin's mom.

"I had some other pictures in there I thought you might want, mostly of Hunter," Alexis replied.

"Thank you, dear. Cade is a very handsome boy. He looks like his father," Bridget commented while flipping through them.

"Except for the red hair, Hunter looks like Kevin," Alexis smiled. "My boys got their fathers' looks."

"Your daughter looks like her mother," Bridget replied, "That's a mighty adorable family you have."

"Thank you," Alexis smiled. "Maggie is more like my grandmother than she is me in personality."

"Kevin said she was an actress," Bridget recalled.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "She even taught for a while."

"Was she in anything that I might have seen?"

"She did theater mostly," Alexis nodded. "She was Maggie in _Cat on a Hot Tin Roof_. That picture on Kevin's side was her as Titania in _Midsummer's Night Dream_."

"What was her name?"

"Martha Rodgers," Alexis smiled.

"But your father's last name is Castle? Did she not use her married name?"

"My dad changed his name before he became a writer. My grandparents weren't married," Alexis admitted.

"Oh," Bridget replied, "I had no idea."

"It's okay. My grandmother only knew my grandfather for a short time. I actually used his name for Hunter's," Alexis fudged the details because of the need to keep things quiet.

The timer for dinner went off.

"I better get that," Alexis went into the kitchen. She pulled dinner out of the oven and set it aside to cool. She leaned on the counter and breathed. She hated lying.

"More wine, Mom?" she heard Kevin ask his mother.

Alexis hadn't heard the response, but soon Kevin was in the kitchen pouring another glass.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Kevin noticed the look on Alexis's face

"It may sound crazy considering I spent eight years lying to you, my dad, and everyone else about Hunter's father, but I don't like lying to people," Alexis admitted.

"You mean what you said about your grandfather? Lex, don't worry about it. I don't even know the whole story there. No one does," Kevin told her.

"Maybe that should change," Alexis said thoughtfully. "I should tell you what I know. I owe you that."

"You don't owe me anything, not about that," Kevin told her softly. "You tell me when you're ready, okay?"

"Yeah, okay," she nodded while pulling out the salad from the refrigerator, "Dinner is ready. Will you bring this to the table when you bring your mother her glass of wine?"

"Sure," Kevin smiled. "Just in case I forget to tell you later, you look beautiful this evening."

"Thank you," she slipped on her oven mitts again to carry the baking dish to the dining room.

Kevin put the salad down and then his mother's wine, "Mom? Dinner's ready."

"Wonderful," she joined her son in the dining room, "I'm famished."

Alexis put down the lasagna and then took her seat, "I hope you like chicken lasagna, Bridget."

"I've only had the sausage variety," Bridget confessed, "But I'll try anything at least once."

"Smells delicious," Kevin commented.

"Thank you. Kate gave me the recipe," Alexis admitted.

Alexis dished out their meals and then waited with baited breath for both Bridget and Kevin to give it a taste.

"This is delicious," Bridget smiled.

"Mom's right," Kevin replied, "This is wonderful."

"Thank you," Alexis smiled as she took a bite herself.

Dinner passed nicely with a relaxed atmosphere now that Alexis had relaxed.

Alexis looked at the clock once they moved back to the living room for dessert.

"So far, so good," Alexis thought to herself, knowing Maggie and Jim were due back shortly.

"Kevin, don't turn on the television," Bridget scolded when Alexis brought coffee into the living room with the dessert.

"I just want to check the score of the baseball game," Kevin said.

"It's fine. We might see Dad, Javi, and the boys. How do you take your coffee Bridget?" Alexis asked Bridget

"Black, with a little Irish crème, if you have it," Bridget replied.

"I do actually," Alexis went to the liquor cabinet. "It was a house warming gift from Jim."

"This Jim sounds like a smart man," Bridget smiled.

"He is," Alexis nodded as she poured a little Irish cream into Bridget's cup and gave it to her. "Kate and I were saying what a waste it is."

"Irish crème is never a waste," Bridget swirled the liquor into her coffee with a spoon.

"No, not that. Kate's mom died when she was nineteen, and as far as Kate knows Jim's been alone ever since."

"I can relate," Bridget replied, "I haven't had any urge to date since Kevin's dad passed away."

"For which I'm glad," Kevin commented. "I would not like having to run background checks on old men."

Alexis backhanded his shoulder, "That would be a misuse of police resources, and that's frowned upon."

"That's probably the argument Kate will use when your dad asks her to run a background check on Jo's first date. I'll back him up," Kevin responded, "Especially since it's my plan when Sarah Grace goes on her dates."

"I'm pretty sure it was also Chris's plan when Maggie grew up."

"I'll keep with his wishes," Kevin assured her.

"That's what I'm afraid of," Alexis frowned.

There was a knock at the door which caught Alexis off guard. "That must be Jim and Maggie returning from their show. I hope Mags didn't wear Jim out."

"I'll get it," Kevin got up and walked to the door. "Someone's worn out. Do you want me to take her?"

"I have her," Jim stepped into Alexis's apartment with Maggie draped across his shoulder, "She's as light as a feather."

"How long has she been asleep?" Alexis observed her daughter sound asleep on Jim's shoulder.

"She fell asleep on the cab ride home," Jim explained, "She was jabbering on a mile a minute, and then she was just out."

"Crash landed," Alexis smirked while taking Maggie from Jim. "She does that all the time. I appreciate you taking her tonight."

"I appreciated the tickets. I haven't had such a pretty date since the last time I talked Katie and Jo into seeing a show with me."

"Did she have fun?" Alexis swayed with Maggie in her arms for a few moments.

"She would have been dancing in the aisles if she thought she could get away with it," Jim laughed. "She was bouncing about in her seat from beginning to end."

"I'm glad," Alexis smiled. "There is dessert if you're interested. I'm just going to put her down. Oh, Jim Beckett, this is Bridget Ryan, Kevin's mom."

"It's good to meet you," Bridget and Jim shook hands.

"You, too. Is that Chocolate Potato Cake?"

"You've had it before?" Bridget looked to Jim in surprise, "Most people have never even heard of it."

"My wife liked to experiment," Jim smiled. "She was pretty good at baking cakes."

Kevin quickly retrieved another piece of the dessert for Jim. When he returned, Bridget and Jim were laughing at something one of them had said.

Alexis joined him a few moments later and whispered, "Did I miss something?"

"Is that flirting?" Kevin gulped nervously.

"Should we call Beckett and warn her?"

"Warn her about what?" Kevin asked, "My mom?"

"No, but perhaps her father may start to date after all."

"That's probably a discussion Kate and her father should have on their own," Kevin replied, "As I hope it will be a conversation my mother will have with me if and when the time comes."

"I think it's kind of sweet," Alexis smiled.

"We're going to agree to disagree on this one."

"Help me with the dishes," she tugged on his arm to pull him into the kitchen.

"You have a dishwasher," Kevin said.

"I know," Alexis whispered.

"Not happening," Kevin shook his head, "Not on my watch."

"Kevin, come with me," Alexis smiled while tugging on his hand a second time.

"But what about-" Kevin pointed at his mother and Jim.

Alexis yanked him into the kitchen with a giggle, "Would you calm down? They are just talking."

Bridget's laughter floated in.

"And laughing," Alexis amended.

"I'm not ready for this." Kevin admitted.

"It's been six years," she ran a hand along his shoulder.

"Yeah, I know," he nodded. "I know my dad would want her to be happy."

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I'd want that for you."

"And I you," he swallowed hard, "But as a son of my father..."

"You're not ready," she replied, "I get it. I was right there when Dad started dating again after my mom, and then Gina. It's not easy in the beginning, but you have to remember your mom deserves to be happy."

"I know," Kevin nodded.

"If it makes you feel any better, you and Kate could be going through this discomfort together."

"It doesn't," Kevin shook his head.

"Just think, you and Kate could be brother and sister," she snickered.

"Then I'd be your uncle," he added.

"Bridget would be Hunter's grandma and his step-great grandmother."

"Not so amusing now, is it?" he baited her.

"I think it's hilarious," Alexis giggled. "Just so long as there's no blood connection between you and me, I'm good."

"Only Castle's daughter would find this amusing," he rolled his eyes.

Alexis put her arms around his neck, "Only Castle's daughter would think of..." she whispered the rest into his ear, sending blood rushing straight to his groin.

"That's not fair," he groaned, "I have to drive my mother home before you can make good on that threat."

"We could let Jim drive her home."

"Not a chance," he shook off the suggestion.

"What do you think he's gonna do? Grope her?"

"Among other things," Kevin replied.

"You're being ridiculous," Alexis shook her head in amusement.

"When your dad started to date after Gina, what was your reaction?"

"That's not a fair question. Have you seen some of the women he dated before he had the good sense to snap up Beckett? I'm not sure they were all legal."

"That might be a bit too much information to give a cop about his potential future father-in-law."

"I wonder," Alexis mused. "If I'd been legal when we met, what do you think would've happened?"

"I was still pretty stung from how things ended with Siobhan," he admitted, "I wasn't in a good head space."

"She was the woman who just marched up and kissed you, right? Didn't she slap you, too?"

"That would be the one," Kevin confirmed.

"If you'd have met her under different circumstances do you think things would've worked out with her?"

"I don't know," he shrugged, "She was in love with a different guy. I don't know if she would have liked a square like Kevin Ryan."

"She doesn't know what she missed," Alexis kissed him lightly.

"I'm going to check on them," Kevin excused himself. He didn't want to pursue the current conversation with Alexis. That time in his life was difficult for him to talk about.

He'd never fully made peace with how things all went down.

Alexis frowned a little when she watched Kevin leave. She knew avoidance when she saw it. Her father was right, she'd taken one too many psych classes in medical school.

-d-d-d-

Alexis looked up when her bedroom door opened.

"I thought you'd be staying at your mom's tonight."

"Let's think that through," he smiled while leaning against the door frame. "I could have stayed at my mother's place and slept alone, or I could let myself into my girlfriend's place and perhaps have a chance of talking her into a dip in the hot tub."

"Is everyone asleep upstairs?" Alexis smiled, knowing that he would've checked on the kids before coming into her room.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "Cade had a Yankees pennant next to him."

"I told him we'd hang it tomorrow," Alexis smiled, "He wants to join a baseball team next summer."

"The station sponsors one," Kevin smiled. "I know Ian and Jamie are on it."

"Sounds good," Alexis smiled. "I believe you were saying something about the hot tub?"

"What do you say, Dr. LaSalle?" he tempted her, "Care for a dip?"

"Did you bring any swim trunks?" she asked.

"Sorry, I didn't."

"Good," Alexis smiled.

Kevin held out his hand to pull her into him. "Mind if I stay the night?"

"Not at all," Alexis shook her head. "I can't of anything I'd like more."

"That's a good answer," he grinned and dipped in for a kiss. "You made a good impression on my mother."

"I'm glad," Alexis smiled. "You have no idea how nerve wracking it was to meet her tonight."

"All she wants is what every parent wants for their child, to be happy," he told her, "She could see how happy you make me."

"I hope my mom sees that when she meets you as my boyfriend and not just as a friend of my dad's," Alexis smiled.

"When might that be, Babe?"

"She called this morning," Alexis admitted as they went out to the balcony and took off the cover. "She wanted to apologize for not coming to see me when I was stabbed."

"Does that mean we should be expecting Hurricane Meredith to come swooping in soon?" Kevin used the reference her father always used to describe his ex-wife.

"She said she wants to see her grandkids," Alexis admitted quietly. "I'm not sure that's a great idea."

"Why is that?" Kevin shed his shirt while Alexis fired up the hot tub.

Alexis turned around and had to smile at the image Kevin presented before she got serious again, "I would love my mom to be the type of grandma to my kids that Gram was to me but…"

"You don't trust her," Kevin finished.

"She was never the 'mom' type," Alexis frowned, "Up until now, she hasn't been the 'grandma' type either. I don't want her blowing into town, making a bunch of promises to do things with them, and then blowing out before she can follow through on any of them."

Kevin stood next to her and took her hand, "I am sorry she wasn't there when you needed her, but maybe she wants to make amends for that with this generation. She might feel bad about never being there."

"Should that be my problem though?" Alexis brought her free arm around his shoulder. "My children have been through so much this year already. That's when she should have shown up. That's when she could have made amends, but she couldn't be bothered. Why should I bother now?"

"Should I bother saying it or just assume you know the answer?" Kevin smiled.

"Because she's my mother," Alexis groaned. "You're too smart for your own good, Kevin Ryan."

"That's not what Esposito says," he chuckled.

"Don't listen to him," Alexis shook her head as she stood in front of him, "Finish getting undressed already."

"Why, Dr. LaSalle, are you trying to talk me out of my clothes?" he smirked.

"If I have to tear them off of you, I'm going to use the handcuffs I kept from a certain weekend we spent together."

"How is that actually a threat?" he asked.

"I learned how to hog tie when I was in med school."

"I might just make you prove that some time," Kevin smiled.

Alexis dropped her nightgown to the floor and looked over her shoulder, "Coming?"

"That's not fair," he looked her up and down when she climbed into the hot tub. He practically jumped out of his clothes and into the hot tub after her.

Alexis giggled, "We have to be quiet. Maggie wanted her window open tonight, and she's right above us."

"I'll be as quiet as a mouse," he began sucking at her neck.

"You might have to gag me," Alexis groaned. "I love it when you do that."

"What else do you love?" he brushed her hair away from her shoulder.

"You," she responded without missing a beat, "How about I show you?"

"Oh please do," Kevin smiled as Alexis climbed into his lap, legs on either side of his thighs.

"I'm glad you came over."

"Me too," Kevin nodded.

-d-d-d-d-

He could hear her thinking after they'd relocated to the bed after a stimulating and then relaxing dip in the hot tub, "Stop it."

"What?" Alexis said.

"Stop thinking about your mother visiting," Kevin smirked.

"It's going to be a disaster," Alexis frowned, "You said it yourself, she's 'Hurricane Meredith'. She leaves so much destruction in her wake."

Kevin opened his eyes and looked at her, "How about this? Before she comes into the apartment and sees the kids, meet with her. Lay down the law. Let her know she has exactly one shot at this. If she disappoints them, she is no longer welcome in your home."

"That's a good idea," she touched his chin lightly, "You're just full of good advice tonight."

"A lifetime of listening to my mother, my sisters, and Beckett were bound to rub off sometime," Kevin smiled.

"I was stabbed," Alexis frowned.

"I remember," he touched one of her scars.

"I could have died," Alexis added, "She didn't even show up. What kind of mother does that?"

"I don't know," Kevin shook his head.

"I know I should rise above this as Gram would say, but she wasn't at my wedding," Alexis shook her head. "My husband died, and she didn't show up. I nearly died, and she couldn't be bothered."

"It's not because of you," Kevin tried to assure her, "This is a Meredith problem, not an Alexis problem."

"You know I never really missed her growing up. I had Dad, and I had Gram," Alexis shook her head. "It wasn't until Gram died that I really felt I didn't have a mother."

"I know," he caressed her shoulder, "It was her loss."

"Thank you," she took his hand. "You're pretty good at saying the right thing. Why is that?"

"Did I mention growing up in a house full of women?" he reminded her, "You learn the tricks after dealing with decades of tears."

Alexis smiled and scooted closer so that her legs tangled with his, "I love you."

"I love you too."

"Good answer," Alexis smiled.

"That is always going to be my answer," he replied.

"You are about to get so lucky," Alexis rolled on top of him and then got on her knees.

"Should I add the cheesy line about how I'm already lucky?" he asked.

"No," she shook her head from side to side, "Leave it at 'I love you' and kiss me."

"I love you," Kevin reached up and brought her back down to kiss.

=d=d=d=d=

"Make it stop," Alexis groaned as her landline rang at about quarter to six the next morning.

"Who has the nerve to call this early?" Kevin's head rose just enough to read the clock.

"If someone isn't dead, whoever's on the other end is about to be," Alexis picked up the phone. "LaSalle."

" _Alexis, sweetheart, I have wonderful news,"_ her mother's chipper voice spoke through the phone.

"Mom, it's six in the morning," Alexis groaned, "It's three in California. Shouldn't you be asleep or just going to sleep?"

" _Sweetheart, I'm not in California. I just landed in Iceland."_

"What in the world are you doing in Iceland?" Alexis asked.

" _After we got off the phone, I was offered a part. It's the role of a lifetime."_

"Wow, Mom, that's great," Alexis dutifully responded, "What's the part?"

" _I don't know the details,"_ Meredith said and Alexis could actually see the impatient wave of her mother's hand in her mind's eye. _"But I wanted to call to tell you I have to reschedule our visit. I am so sorry, Sweetheart. I'll call the minute I get back to the states."_

"No, I understand," Alexis tried to feign sadness, "Break a leg, and let us know when we can see the finished product."

" _I will,"_ Meredith promised. _"I have to go. They're calling my flight. Bye, Sweetheart."_

"Bye, Mom," Alexis put down the phone and released a sigh of relief.

"You okay?" Kevin asked.

"Relieved," Alexis nodded.

"Did Hurricane Meredith change course?" he inquired.

"She's off to Europe," Alexis snuggled back into bed.

"This is what you want, isn't it?"

"Yes and no," she replied.

"Explain?" Kevin asked.

"I'd love to, but you need to go."

"Need to go where?" he frowned, "I have a couple of hours until I have to be at the precinct."

"You don't have any clothes here," Alexis reminded him. "Or did you bring a bag that I didn't notice?"

"Minor detail," he waved off her concern.

"Do you really want to go to the station wearing yesterday's clothes?" she asked.

Kevin sighed imagining Javi's teasing, "Good point."

"We can have lunch, and I will explain my cryptic answer."

"Okay, but no rehearsing your answer so I won't be worried about you."

"We'll talk later," she assured him, "Now get going."

"Call me when you want to have lunch," Kevin smiled and gave her a kiss after he dressed.

"I will," Alexis agreed.

"Go back to sleep," Kevin advised.

"I love you," she relaxed into the pillows.

"I love you," he smiled as he headed out the door.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

So, how did we do?


	51. Chapter 34

Hello everyone! I hope you all had great holidays. Here is the next chapter

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin opened the closet of his childhood bedroom. He'd promised his mother years ago that he'd go through it. With the rain outside keeping him indoors, he figured he'd finally make good on his promise.

He found some old yearbooks and smiled while flipping through them, spotting pictures of himself with some old friends he'd long ago lost touch with. Putting aside the yearbook, he opened another box and pulled out a binder. He figured it for one of his old school binders but was surprised to find his baseball collection staring back at him.

"Are you finally going through all of this junk?" Bridget stuck her head into her son's room to see what he was up to.

"Yeah," Kevin smiled. "I thought you'd have tossed all this out years ago."

"I didn't want to throw away mementos of your childhood, especially these cards," Bridget responded, "You used to spend hours on end going through these binders, pricing each card to determine how much it was worth and then trading with your friends in the hopes of getting a better card with even greater value."

"I'd forgotten I had some of these," Kevin flipped through the pages, "Some of these cards might be worth something. I didn't know I had Derek Jeter's rookie card. I didn't even know who he was back then."

"Like you'd ever sell them," Bridget smiled. "You're far too sentimental. Your father was the same way about his collection of antique fishing lures."

"You still have those?" Kevin asked in disbelief.

"Of course," Bridget laughed, "Your father would roll over in his grave if I ever sold those blasted things."

"You should give them to Frank. He'd love them."

"Honestly, I'm not ready to let them go," she admitted, "They were your father's pride and joy."

"Aside from his family you mean," Kevin prompted her.

"Of course," Bridget laughed, "I think your father always hoped you'd want them when the time came."

"I like fishing alright, but it's never been my favorite past time," Kevin shrugged and then smiled as he turned the page. He pointed, "Dad gave me this one. It was his when he was a boy."

"I remember," Bridget smiled. "You were so proud of it, you hid it under your bed in a shoe box, wrapped in plastic the night he gave it to you."

"It's still one of my favorites," he replied.

"Didn't you say Javier mentioned Hunter had a good time at the game?"

"Yeah," Kevin responded, "Javi said Hunter knew more about baseball than he and Rick."

"Do you know if he collects cards?"

"I guess it's possible," Kevin replied.

"Perhaps he'd be as proud of the cards he inherited from his father as you were when you inherited the card from yours," Bridget replied.

"Yeah, maybe," Kevin nodded. "I've been keeping my distance from him because of how he first reacted."

"You can't stay away forever."

"Maybe I'll call Alexis and see if Hunter is ready to chat for a bit," Kevin rose to his feet, closing up the binder with the Derek Jeter rookie card inside.

"Good luck," Bridget left him to call Alexis.

" _Hello_?"

"Hey, Babe, it's me," Kevin replied, "Got a few minutes to chat?"

" _Yeah, sure_ ," Alexis smiled. " _Kate and I are making dinner, but I think she can spare me for a few moments_."

"I was wondering if you think Hunter is up to spending time with me," Kevin stated nervously.

" _Oh_ ," Alexis said, a little surprised. " _Um, he's calmed down a lot. I guess it wouldn't hurt to ask_."

"Okay," Kevin waited anxiously for Alexis to give him the answer.

A few moments later she got back on the phone, " _Kev? When can you come over?_ "

"After dinner work for you?"

" _Yeah. Why don't you come for dessert? We're having birthday cake. It's for Gram. Today was her birthday_."

"Did you want me to pick up anything on my way over?" he asked.

" _Champagne_ ," Alexis posed. " _Do you remember the kind Gram liked?_ "

"Of course," he replied, "If memory serves, it's also your favorite."

" _I'll see you in a few hours_."

"I'll be there," he hung up the phone.

-d-d-d-d-d-

"Come on guys," Alexis ushered Cade and Maggie into the den. "Jo, Jamie, and Ian are waiting to watch a movie with you."

"Awe, do we have to?" Maggie moaned.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "We're cleaning up dinner and don't need little hands and feet sidetracking us. When we're finished, we're going to have cake, okay?"

"Okay," Maggie conceded to her mother's requested only because sweet treats were promised, "Is Defective Wyan coming over?"

"In a bit," Alexis bit back a laugh. "He and your brother are going to talk."

"Okay," Maggie bounced towards the den like a kangaroo.

"Thank you," Alexis shook her head. "Dad, you, too."

"Aw, do I have to?" he moaned like his granddaughter had moments earlier.

"Kate," Alexis called.

"Castle, act your age every now and then," Kate scolded her husband.

"Fine," Castle moped into his office.

"He's such the big kid," Alexis shook her head.

"So, where do you want me?" Kate asked.

"You know how to be unobtrusive," Alexis smiled. "We can just hang out wherever."

"You want backup in case things go bad, don't you?" Kate concluded.

"Yes," Alexis nodded.

"Never fear," Kate snickered, "How about some tea to calm your nerves?"

"Thanks. You have any gin?"

"We'll save that for if things go bad," Kate replied.

"Right," she nodded and then looked towards the door when the bell rang.

"You want me to get it?"

"Yes. No. Maybe," Alexis said.

"Alexis, it's just two people who share DNA talking," Kate was off her stool immediately.

"Right. Okay. Go answer the door."

"Hey, Ryan," Kate greeted the younger detective, "Still raining out, huh?"

"Yeah," Kevin said as he handed her the bottle of champagne he'd stopped for and then ran a hand through his hair, shaking the water from it. "Hey, Lex."

"Hey, Babe," Alexis went to greet him, "I'm glad you called."

"Me, too," Kevin gave her a light kiss and hugged her after shedding his rain soaked coat. "Where's Hunter?"

"Upstairs," Alexis nodded. "I'll go get him."

" _I'll_ go get him," Kate said.

"Thanks, Kate," Alexis called after her.

"I'm a little nervous," Kevin admitted once they were alone.

"I know," Alexis nodded. "I am, too."

"So I'm not going insane on my own," he smiled, "That's comforting."

Alexis looked around just a bit to make sure they were alone and then put her hands on his shoulders, "You are both good people. Just take it slow. He doesn't like change."

"I just hope I make a good impression," Kevin shifted nervously from foot to foot.

"What's with the binder?" Alexis motioned towards the binder in his hands he somehow managed to transport without getting a drop of rain on it.

"It's something I found in my closet at my mom's place," Kevin replied, "I thought Hunter and I could go through it. It's baseball cards."

There was a slight pause before Kevin added, "Kids still collect baseball cards now days, don't they?"

"Yes, they do," Alexis nodded. "He actually just started collecting them about a month ago. One of his new friends got him interested."

"Then I can give him some pointers," Kevin smiled, "I've been collecting for over twenty years now."

Alexis smiled and then looked towards the stairs as Hunter came down in front of Kate, "Hey, Buddy."

"Hey, Detective...er...Kevin," Hunter fumbled with what to call the man he'd come to know was his father.

"Hi, Hunter," Kevin smiled. "How are you?"

"Good," the young boy shifted nervously from one foot to the other.

Alexis hid a snort at how alike they truly were having watched Kevin's same gesture only minutes earlier.

"Why don't you two sit at the table? I'll get you something to drink," Alexis smiled.

"Thanks, Alexis," Kevin motioned for Hunter to take the lead, "So your mom just told me you started collecting baseball cards. I've been collecting since I was about your age. I thought maybe we could work out a trade."

"A trade?" Hunter looked at him curiously. "What kind of trade?"

"Let's see what cards you have and then we can talk," Kevin suggested.

"Okay," Hunter retrieved the cards he'd brought over to show Ian and Jamie and spread them out on the table.

Alexis started to set up plates and cups for the cake. She took her time so Kevin and Hunter could talk. Just as she was putting out the silverware, some of their conversation drifted in for her to hear.

"Yeah, I like that card too. My dad-I mean Christopher," Hunter corrected himself and then went silent.

"It's okay, Hunter," Kevin assured him, "Chris will always have a place as your dad. I hope one day there might be room enough for me too, but I'm very patient."

"So it's still okay to call him Dad?" Hunter asked.

"Absolutely," Kevin nodded.

"Hey, Hunter, can you go get everyone for cake?" Alexis interrupted them a few moments later.

"But we haven't finalized our trade yet," Hunter frowned.

"Kevin's not going anywhere. You can finish after cake."

"Okay," Hunter was off his chair to gather his family.

Alexis waited for Hunter to disappear before she turned to Kevin, "You okay?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "I think the first attempt at bonding went pretty well."

"That's not what I meant," Alexis said. "I know it bothers you that Hunter still calls Chris 'dad'."

"It does a little," Kevin admitted, "But for eight years of his life, that's exactly who Chris was to him. I'm just glad to have a chance now to have a relationship with him."

"You're a better man than you know," Alexis smiled.

"I have it on pretty good authority that you're drawn to decent men," he gave her a cryptic response.

"I've found that decent men are good kissers," Alexis teased.

"Should we test the theory now or wait until later when we can be alone?" he raised a brow.

"Later. There are way too many people who can walk in on us right now," Alexis nodded.

"I can be patient," he gave her a wink. In the next moment, Maggie and Jo came running in asking for their cake.

"Yes, we can have cake."

"Hi, Mags, Jo," Kevin greeted the pair.

"Hi, Defective Wyan," Maggie chirped.

Kevin responded with a chuckle and then tugged at her ponytail playfully before Alexis handed her a piece of cake.

"Hey, where's my piece?" Castle entered.

"I think you're old enough to get your own piece, Dad," Alexis rolled her eyes while passing out pieces to the rest of the kids, "Kevin brought some champagne too."

"Ah, perfect," Castle smiled. "I'll get some glasses."

"Already took care of it," Alexis replied, "Just pop the cork and pour."

"Sounds good," Castle said as he popped the cork, Kate quickly putting a glass under it to catch the champagne.

"Do that again, Grandpa," Maggie clapped at the excitement of her grandfather popping the cork on the bottle.

"Not tonight, Miss Maggie, but there will be more bottles."

"Awe," she stuck out her lip to pout.

"You are most definitely Gram's mini-me," Alexis kissed the top of her daughter's head.

"Do you miss her?" Maggie asked.

"Yeah, I do," Alexis nodded.

"Then I do too," Maggie smiled up at her mother and then forked a big bite of cake into her mouth.

Alexis smiled and kissed the top of her daughter's head before she finished her own cake.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis stood by the window looking out at the night. The kids were all upstairs. H er dad had insisted they stay for the night.

"Everything okay, Babe?" Kevin approached her and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind.

"I don't know," Alexis shook her head and let her head rest against his shoulder. "I've been thinking a lot about her today."

"Your gram?" he asked.

"Yeah. She never judged me when it came to us. I went to her because I needed someone to talk to, but I half expected her to go straight to my dad."

"That was one of the greatest things about Martha," Kevin smiled, "She always was there when you needed to talk. No judgment, just great advice."

"And she did give me great advice," she turned to look at him. "I told her I wanted you to be happy and I didn't think it could happen while we were together because you'd be split in two. She said I had to be willing to let you go."

"How is that great advice?" he asked, "I didn't want to let you go. Still don't."

"If you had ever decided you needed to end us, I had to be strong enough to let you. That was her advice."

"It would never have come to that," he responded, "I was looking more for the courage to end my marriage. Honestly, I don't understand what took me so long."

"At the heart of everything, you wanted to give Sarah Grace what you had; a whole family. You put her before everything. I get that."

"I guess you have a point," he sighed.

"You know, it's very quiet around here. Want to go into my dad's office and fool around?"

"Tempting," he snorted, "What are the odds we'd actually get away with anything?"

"Pretty good," Alexis smiled. "Dad's upstairs reading a book to the kids and Kate is in the shower."

"If we get caught in the act, I'm blaming you," Kevin responded while Alexis pulled him into the office.

"I'll take it," Alexis said as closed the door behind them, locking it. "Besides, the last time we were in this room together, not very happy."

"We certainly should make up for that," he began by sucking lightly at the pulse point on her neck that always drew a positive response.

Alexis lightly pushed him into a chair and climbed into his lap.

"God, I love you," Kevin's hands anchored at her waist to keep her close.

"I love you, too," she smiled at him. "How quiet can you be?"

"As quiet as I need to be," he smirked.

"Good," Alexis nodded.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis knocked lightly on the boys' room door and poked her head in. Hunter was sitting up reading.

"Hey, Buddy, want to come down and have some hot cocoa?" Alexis asked when he looked up to see who'd opened the door.

"Sure," Hunter got out of bed and followed his mom downstairs.

"Pull up a stool," Alexis pushed a mug of cocoa towards him.

"Did Detective Ryan leave?" Hunter looked around curiously.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "You guys seemed to get along pretty well today."

"He seems nice enough," Hunter shrugged, "We never did get to complete our trade though."

"Next time," Alexis replied, "Are you doing okay with all of this? I know it's a big adjustment."

Hunter frowned, "How come he didn't know about me?"

"Because I didn't tell him until we returned to New York," Alexis replied, "It's complicated."

"I hate that word," Hunter said.

"I know," she nodded.

"If he'd known about me and come to New Orleans, would you have left Dad for him?" Hunter asked.

"Oh God, Hunter," Alexis sighed. "I don't know. What I do know is that Chris wanted me to tell Kevin about you."

"He did?"

"Yeah. He brought it up for the first time after Cade was born."

"Why did he want Kevin to know?" Hunter took a drink from his mug.

"Because when Cade was born, he realized how unfair it was for Kevin not to know you existed and that you were calling someone else 'Dad'."

"But then Kevin might have come to New Orleans to steal you away," Hunter frowned.

"Baby, I don't know what would have happened if things had been different," Alexis reached for his hand, "Know that I loved Chris very much. Also, you need to know how much Chris loved you and loved that you called him 'Dad'."

"I miss him," Hunter said.

"I miss him, too," Alexis smiled. "But you have to know that getting to know Kevin would be okay with him."

Hunter nodded in understanding. "Kevin makes you happy. I see it when you look at him."

"Is that your way of saying you're okay with us?"

"Maybe not totally," he shrugged, "But kinda."

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "You done?"

"Yeah," Hunter took his last drink, "Do you think I could spend more time with Kevin?"

"I think he would like that. I'll call him tomorrow and set something up."

"Thanks, Mom," he hopped off his stool and head for the stairs, turning to wish her goodnight before running up.

Alexis watched him go and smiled before she got up, going to the window and looking up.

"Thank you," she whispered to the sky.


	52. Chapter 35

Hello there. I hope everyone enjoys the following chapter and shows it by replying.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis rolled over in her bed and reached out her hand. It landed in an empty space causing her to open her eyes, "Kevin?"

"Hey, Babe, over here," Kevin spoke from the bench at the end of her bed where he was pulling on his loafer.

"Is it morning already?" she glanced towards the clock with a frown.

"Very early, but, yes, it's morning," Kevin turned towards her.

"You look tired."

"Someone kept waking me up," he stepped around to her side of the bed and hovered over her.

"Who would do something so rude?" she pulled on his tie to bring his lips to hers.

"This beautiful redhead I love and whose bed I want to get back into."

"Then why don't you?" Alexis wagged a brow suggestively, "We've got time before the kids wake up."

"I gotta get home and get ready for work," Kevin said regretfully.

"Yeah, I guess so," she sighed heavily while tossing away the covers and donning her robe, "How about I make you some coffee before you go?"

"That'd be nice," Kevin nodded. "It'd be even nicer if I didn't have to keep sneaking out of here every morning."

"I don't really see much of a way around it. The alternative would be not spending the nights together, and I don't like the sound of that at all," she replied.

"Actually there is another way," Kevin followed her into the kitchen.

"And what's that?" Alexis began the process of making coffee.

"Maybe we should start thinking about moving into together."

"Thinking is about as far as I'm willing to go at the moment," Alexis replied, "Come on, Kevin, think this through just a bit. We've only been officially dating for a few months. Yes, the kids are getting along, but come on, they aren't ready to live together."

"The kids know we're dating. Why do I have to keep sneaking out of here at the crack of dawn?"

"Because my kids are eight, six, and four. They're not old enough to be aware that Mommy has sleepovers."

"When will be the right time?" he challenged her. "I love you, and I want to start building a life with you and our kids."

"Kev, it hasn't even been a year," Alexis reminded him.

"Is that always going to be your excuse?" he asked.

"That's not fair," Alexis snapped at him, "I watched my husband die right before my eyes. Your spouse just ended up being a sociopath."

"And you're using Chris's death as an excuse not to move forward," Kevin said. "You always run away from me."

"I didn't run away from you," Alexis said.

"You sure as hell did," he responded, "It was you who flew all the way to New Orleans or was that a different red head who was pregnant with my child?"

"I'm going back to bed," Alexis turned away from him abruptly. "When you want to have this conversation without dredging up the past, you know where I am."

Kevin cursed after Alexis left the kitchen. He poured himself a coffee to go and grabbed his coat by the front door.

"Bye, Defective Wyan, have a good day," Maggie greeted him on his way out the door, thinking nothing of her mother's boyfriend presence so early in the morning.

Kevin froze and looked back at Maggie who smiled at him before trotting of to her mom's room.

"Hi, Mommy," Maggie climbed into her mother's bed.

"Mags, what are you doing up so early?" Alexis was startled by her daughter's presence.

"I was hungry," Maggie explained.

"Hungry, huh," Alexis opened her arms of her daughter, "What should we do about that?"

"Can you make the scones Auntie Lanie gave you?" she scrambled into her mother's arms.

"I sure can," Alexis hugged her daughter tight, adding a kiss to the little girl's forehead. "Did you want to help?"

"Yes," Maggie smiled.

"Come on," Alexis tugged her out of the room.

"How come Defective Wyan didn't stay for breakfast?"

Alexis momentarily froze when her daughter's words registered. She wondered how much her daughter had seen and heard of her disagreement with Kevin.

"He, uh, had to get to work."

"Oh," Maggie replied, "Does he like scones, Mommy?"

"I don't know," Alexis said.

 _Pancakes? Really?_

 _What?_

 _Pancakes are not just a breakfast food._

 _Is this one of Javi's theories?_

 _It's common knowledge that pancakes are an edible way of saying 'thank you for sex'._

"Oh," Maggie frowned.

"But it doesn't matter, Sweetheart," Alexis tweaked her nose, "You and your brothers like scones, so we'd best get baking."

"Okay," Maggie smiled.

-d-d-d-d-

"I'm scarring my daughter," Alexis announced as she sat down on the couch in the loft next to her stepmother. She'd dropped the kids off at day camp and then swung by her father's loft in the hopes of finding a sympathetic ear.

"And how did you accomplish that?" Kate put an arm around Alexis's shoulder, recognizing she needed a bit of maternal comfort.

"First, where's Dad?"

"He took your brothers to baseball practice," Kate replied.

"Okay. Kevin slept over last night."

"Did they overhear the two of you..." Kate trailed off.

"God, I hope not. No, Maggie saw him leaving this morning."

"What's the big deal there?" Kate frowned in confusion, "She already knows you're dating him, and she seems to like him, aside from calling him 'Defective Wyan'."

"She asked why he didn't stay for breakfast."

"Bud, I'm not really seeing the problem here," Kate replied, "I know you were quite a bit older when Castle and I started having sleepovers, but you were okay with it."

"I'm worried she overheard a fight Kevin and I had."

"Now, we're getting somewhere," Kate replied, "What were you fighting about?"

"Living together," Alexis said.

"Wow, that seems a bit sudden," Kate's eyes went wide.

"Thank you," Alexis nodded. "That's what I said."

"So I take it you're not packing up your things just yet," Kate concluded.

"No," Alexis sighed. "I want a life with Kevin, but it hasn't even been a year since I lost Chris, Kate."

"That's not a valid excuse," Kate challenged her, "Time is just a thing that keeps ticking away. If you're saying you're not ready because you still miss Chris and aren't ready for that next step, then I understand, and I think Kevin would too."

"I'll always miss Chris," Alexis held her hand up to show Kate her bare fingers. She'd finally found the courage to remove her rings a few days earlier yet she missed their familiar weight. "I'm saving the engagement ring for one of the boys."

"I'm sure they'll be honored," Kate smiled, "Chris would want you to move on, when you're ready, but it's up to you to decide when that is. You need to be honest with Kevin."

"I don't want to lose what we have again, Kate. I know I'm the one who threw it away the first time, but I don't think I could survive it ending a second time."

"Bud, I think you're both in the same boat there," Kate replied, "Kevin is in it for the long haul. He'll understand if you want to slow down a bit."

Alexis was about to respond when her cell phone rang. "It's Lanie," Alexis glanced at her phone. "I'm on call today."

"Go ahead. You want some tea or something?"

"I don't think I'll have time for it," Alexis said. "Hey, Lanie, where's the body?"

" _No body,"_ Alexis could tell her boss was near tears, _"It's Kevin and Javi. They were in an accident."_

Alexis sat up straight, "What? How? Are they okay?"

" _I think they're going to be okay,"_ Lanie's voice quivered, _"They're being brought to the precinct. I'm going to meet them there. They refused medical attention at the scene."_

"Stubborn idiots," Alexis said as she got up. "Lanie, stay put. I'll go. If I need help, I'll call."

" _Are you sure?"_ Lanie asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Alexis confirmed.

" _Okay,"_ Lanie agreed. _"Make sure Javi calls me."_

"I will."

"Everything okay?" Kate asked when Alexis was rushing to gather her belongings.

"Kevin and Javi were in an accident," Alexis explained, "They refused medical attention at the scene and are being brought to the precinct. I'm going to examine them."

"Do you want me to go with you?"

"Yeah, I might need someone to drive me," Alexis felt the shaking of her hands.

"Let's go," Kate grabbed her keys and followed Alexis out the door.

"Of all days to argue with him," Alexis sighed heavily, "Then he has to go and get himself into an accident."

"Don't do that to yourself, Alexis," Kate shook her head. "It doesn't do you any good."

d-d-d-d-d

"Okay, you're gonna have a nasty black eye, but you'll be fine," Alexis told Javier after she finished pressing down on the area around his left eye.

"Aw, I'm fine," Javier tried to shake off her exam, "Kevin was the one to take the brunt of the impact."

"I know, but he won't take his shirt off," Alexis glared at Kevin.

"Since when are you shy, Ryan," Javi baited his partner, "It's nothing either of us haven't hasn't seen before."

"Javi, do me a favor and go bother Kate," Alexis shooed him out of the conference room and then closed the door. She drew the blinds on the door and the windows so they had privacy before she turned to Ryan, "Shirt off, Detective."

"Trying to get me out of my clothes, Dr. LaSalle," Kevin smiled, "Seems awfully unprofessional workplace behavior. Am I going to have to report you?"

"Kevin, take your shirt off, or I'm going to find Perlmutter's number and get him down here."

"I'm fine," Kevin continued on with his weak protest.

"I'll be the judge of that," Alexis replied. Instead of waiting for him to remove his own shirt, she reached for the buttons herself.

"Lex," Kevin stopped her. This was way too familiar.

"Quit being such a baby," she stared him down.

"I'm not. This just feels a little too familiar," he admitted.

"Oh," Alexis took her hands away. "Right. You know what, I'll call Lanie. She and I can switch."

"No," Kevin reached for her hand when she turned to grab her phone, wincing at the movements.

"Someone needs to examine you, Kevin," Alexis looked to him in confusion, "It's either me or Lanie. Take your pick."

"You," Kevin decided as he unbuttoned his shirt and let Alexis look at him.

Alexis bit her lip at the massive bruise on Kevin's side.

"It looks worse than it feels," Kevin was quick to assure her.

"We'll see about that," Alexis began prodding his side to see if he'd cracked or broke any ribs.

"Ah," Kevin hissed as Alexis poked a tender spot.

"Safe side, we're taping your ribs."

"That seems a bit of an overreaction."

"Well, I could drag you to the ER and let you sit there all afternoon."

"You wouldn't dare," he scowled at her.

"Try me," Alexis folded her arms. "Either you let me tape your ribs, or I tell Gates I think you need an X-ray."

Kevin muttered under his breath after consenting to have her tape his ribs.

"Okay," Alexis finished. "Can you breathe okay?"

"I can breathe just fine," he replied.

"Good," Alexis held his face in her hands and gently pushed down on the area under his eyes.

"Just be thankful no one was shooting at me this time," he winced in pain.

"Not funny," Alexis frowned. "I never liked hearing about you guys getting shot at."

"Then you'd best not listen to Castle's stories," Kevin replied, "He likes to make it sound more dramatic than it usually is."

"Does your nose hurt at all?"

"No, it's fine," he replied. He couldn't help but notice the clinical way in which she was conducting her exam. She clearly was still cross with him about their earlier disagreement.

"You're going to feel the pain tomorrow," she replied, "Take some Ibuprofen or something before you go to bed tonight."

"Yes, Dr. LaSalle."

"Good," Alexis took out some disinfectant, "Well, you'll probably get a black eye, too. I just want to clean up some of the scrapes from the glass."

"Do your worst, Doc," he challenged her.

"Don't tempt me," she scowled at him.

"I'm fine, Lex," Kevin smiled at her.

"Just hold still."

Alexis tried to be as careful as possible to minimize the pain she inflicted, but each time he winced she did with him.

"Easier when the patient's dead, huh?" Kevin teased.

To her horror, Alexis felt tears start to form and turned away swiftly, "That should do it."

"Lex," Kevin turned her towards him again, "I'm fine."

"I know. I should-"

"Stay here and talk to me."

"It's just when Lanie called and said that you and Javi had been in an accident, all that stuff with Chris came flooding back. I can't go through that again."

"I'm fine," Kevin got her to look him in the eye. "Lex, I know you went through hell and you still are, but you can't just stop living."

"I know," she nodded, "It's been a hell of a year. Isn't the bad stuff over yet?"

"God, I hope so," Kevin smiled. "Are you busy tonight?"

"Yeah, there's a talent show at the boys' camp."

Kevin frowned in disappointment.

"I'd ask you to come along, but I think it's best for you to go home and rest," she added.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded, "What if you didn't ask me?"

"Kevin," Alexis gave him a look. "You need to relax and rest."

"I can rest and relax in all sorts of places."

"And Sarah Grace?" Alexis pressed. "She's going to want to see that her father is alright."

"You play dirty," Kevin frowned.

"I had some very good teachers. Rain check," Alexis offered.

"Yes, but only if you agree to let me cash it in this weekend."

"Depends on what you have in mind."

"Uh-uh," Kevin shook his head. "This is a surprise."

"You know how much I hate surprises," Alexis groaned, "Put your shirt back on."

"Is the door locked?"

"Kevin, forget it," Alexis shook her head.

"I just want to kiss you without any interruption."

"Not a chance," Alexis took a step back.

"You kissed me while you were in the hospital. We kissed in the Hamptons with your father ten feet away."

"You weren't my patient then."

"Well, then I pronounce myself fit as a fiddle. There, I'm not your patient anymore, and you aren't my doctor. How about that kiss?"

"You are crazy," Alexis found herself between Kevin and the wall.

"But a good kind of crazy, right?" he pinned her against the wall while making an attempt at a sexy smile.

Alexis looped her arms around his neck, "My kind of crazy."

Kevin suddenly felt like he was being set up for something. He saw a curious look in her eyes.

"You gonna kiss me or not?"

"This feels like a trap," Kevin hesitated.

"No, I promise. My stepmother isn't going to bust in here and point a shotgun at you."

"What about your father?"

"Doesn't carry a gun," she chuckled.

"Javi isn't-"

Alexis rolled her eyes and pressed her mouth to his.

Kevin held back as long as he could, but his hormones won out. Soon he was kissing her with all he had, completely forgetting his injuries until he winced in pain.

"Oh God, are you okay?" Alexis asked.

"God, I wish I was," he groaned while pressing his forehead to hers.

"Sit, sit back down," Alexis got him on the table.

"I'm fine," he assured her, "Just don't know my limits yet. Just learned one."

"Yeah, no physical activity beyond walking, sitting, and lying down. Javi's driving you home tonight."

"In what vehicle?"

"My dad's," Alexis held up the keys to her father's Ferrari.

"Does he know you have these?"

"He will tomorrow," Alexis smiled. "Kate got them for me."

"How can I say no to that?" he snatched the keys from her hand. His movements were a bit too quick. He was suddenly doubling over in pain.

"Okay, that's it," Alexis went to the door, "Javi call an ambulance right now."

"I'm fine."

"Shut up, you're going to a hospital."

"I'm fine," he insisted a second time.

"Javi?"

"I'm calling," Espo's voice filtered into the room.

"This is ridiculous," Kevin groaned when Alexis forced him to sit in a nearby chair.

"No, it's not," Alexis looked him in the eye. "I'm not taking any chances with your health."

"This is overkill," he protested, "I was in an accident like this before. I hardly had a scratch."

"Well, you have more than that this time," Alexis stared him down, "Now sit down, shut up and wait for the ambulance, you big baby."

"You have a lousy bedside manner," Kevin grumbled.

"Javi, can you go with him? I would, but I have to get to Cade and Hunter's show," Alexis said.

"Of course," Javi replied, "I'll call you with the diagnosis."

"Thank you. If he tries to escape, have the paramedics strap him down."

"It will be my pleasure."

"The pleasure you'd get out of that is just a bit too creepy, Espo," Alexis snickered.

"I hate you both," Kevin muttered.

"Oh, you love me," Alexis bent down and gave him a kiss before she grabbed her bag and purse. "I'll call you later, okay?"

"If I don't answer, I'm either dead or I killed Javi, so I'm in jail," Kevin replied.

"Funny," Alexis smirked and then got serious, "I'm not doing this to piss you off or annoy you. I want to make sure you're okay and that your ribs don't puncture your lung."

"I know," he sighed, "Doesn't mean I have to like it."

"Just promise me you'll go get an X-ray?"

"I promise."

Alexis cupped his face in her hands and then kissed him again before she whispered in his ear, "Be good for everyone, and I'll take you for a ride in the Ferrari."

"The Ferrari!" Javi was able to overhear, "Come on, Lex, let me drive."

"Nope," Alexis grinned. "Just take care of your partner."

"Then can I drive the Ferrari?" Javi help up his hands like he was holding a steering wheel and began making obnoxious car sounds, complete with squealing tires and rapid accelerations.

"I'm never getting in the car with you again, Partner," Kevin wagged a finger in his direction.

"Besides, it's a two-seater and I have plans for Kevin, the car, and me. See you guys later."

Kevin was grinning like an idiot as Alexis left. Watching Javi's face fall in disappointment was icing on the cake.

"I'm so going to let the ER docs use you as a pin cushion," Javier warned.

"I think Alexis's plans will be worth it," Kevin's grin got wider.

"I doubt it, Bro," Javier stated confidently, "There's going to be some seriously long needles." To make his point, he held his hands wide to show the length of said needle.

"You've never gone parking with Alexis," Kevin said.

"Bad, bad images in my head," Javier groaned when the EMTs arrived to cart Kevin off.

"You coming with him?" one asked.

"Yeah. You got anything for nausea?"

"Yeah, my partner was in the same accident, he might need to be checked out too," Kevin chimed in.

"Your head hurt or anything," the EMT asked.

"I'm fine," Javier glared at his partner, "Ryan is just trying to be cute."

"Hey, Lex thinks I'm adorable."

"Make sure you hit every bump between here and the hospital," Javier requested.

"Are you two married or something?"

"Or something," Javier replied.

"He's just jealous. My girlfriend actually likes me."

The EMTs didn't know what to make of the bantering partners, so they simply loaded Kevin up and took off towards the hospital.


	53. Chapter 36

Hello everyone. I hope everyone on the eastern seaboard is safe and sound. So, we hope you like this chapter. I would love some replies. Did I mention it's my birthday?

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis frowned when she heard Kevin's voice mail message yet again having called to check on things went at the emergency room. She clicked the off button before letting herself into her apartment. Her dad had sensed her distraction during the boys' camp performance and offered to take all three children back to the loft for the night. The kids enthusiastically agreed.

"Men never do what they're told," Alexis tossed her belongings on the hall table and kicked off her shoes. "He's probably out with Javi, having beers and shooting pool. Never mind he was in a serious car crash and could barely breath earlier in the day. Stubborn pain in the ass."

She bypassed the kitchen, and headed for her room, deciding a hot bath would help her calm down. She stepped into her room and froze. Her bed was occupied.

"I was told I needed someone to watch over me throughout the night because I might have a slight concussion. I figured the best place to rest would be the bed of the sexy doctor I'm seeing," he explained his presence. "I'm hoping bodily harm will outweigh what a jerk I was this morning when we last really spoke."

Alexis fought a smile and sat down beside him, "You weren't that much of a jerk. You had some valid points."

"Yes, but I also said some things I shouldn't have," he grasped her hand and brought it to his lips, "I know you had an impossible decision to make when you left nine years ago. I shouldn't be throwing it back at you in the heat of the moment."

"Agreed, but I did run away from you…us," Alexis nodded. "I broke both of our hearts."

"We're both trying to mend them," he added, "I'm sorry for what I said. I was just frustrated."

"Sometimes, I wonder why you put up with me," Alexis smiled a little. "Kev, I want a future with you, but at the same time, I can't help feeling a little disloyal."

"I'm not ever going to attempt to replace Chris," Kevin began, "I know the two of you had a good life together. I am both grateful and a bit jealous...a lot jealous. I don't need sole possession of your heart. I know a large hunk of it will always belong to him. I just need you to be honest with me. Is there room for both of us?"

Alexis sighed shakily and nodded, "Truth is, you've always been there. It's part of why I made Dad come visit me in New Orleans all these years. I knew what running into you could do to both of us, all of us. The only time I came to New York was when I found out about your dad and even then, I never let anyone know I was in town."

"If you need more time or you think the children need more time, I'm okay with waiting to move in together," he added, "I just want to know we're not standing still, that we're moving forward…together."

"Why don't we see what our kids think first? They might not be ready to live together."

"Probably a good idea," he nodded, "When they are ready, we're going to have to figure out a rooming situation, perhaps even find a different place altogether."

"Hunter has a scholarship to a private school," Alexis confessed. "He's set to go to school in the city next year. Cade and Maggie made some friends, but they were in their school for six months. Sarah Grace has been going to school with the same people for what - five or six years? It makes more sense for us to move to a place where she can stay in the same school. Not to mention, I took this place because it was a gift from Dad. I've always wanted a yard and an actual neighborhood like I had in New Orleans."

"Are you saying you'd be willing to move to Brooklyn?" he asked.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I just have to convince Dad and Kate to do the same."

"Good luck with that," Kevin laughed until he winced from the pain.

"Did you get any pain meds?" Alexis asked.

"Yes," he nodded, "I didn't want to take them until you and I talked. They're supposed to make me drowsy."

"Let's get you into some pajamas, and then I'll get you some water. If you want, Dad gave me his latest manuscript to proof. I'll read until you fall asleep."

"You mean I finally get a preview of one of his masterpieces before it goes to print," Kevin's eyes lit up in excitement.

"The upside of it is, you'll probably not remember a word of it," Alexis chuckled while glancing at the prescription bottle, "Boy, your doctor wasn't messing around with these meds. You must be in some serious pain."

"I am. Can I get some assistance getting into my pajamas?"

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "Come on, sit up…slowly."

"How about I just sleep in what I'm wearing?" Kevin suggested an alternative, "Everything hurts right now."

Alexis nodded but she took off his tie, belt, and shoes.

"Can you sit up long enough to take your shirt off?"

"I'll give it a whirl," Kevin sat up slowly and allowed Alexis to peel away the fabric as quickly as possible.

"It's much easier when the guy is dead and I can just cut away the clothes," Alexis confessed, "However I think I like you a whole lot better alive."

"That's sweet. Thanks, Babe," Kevin smirked.

"No problem," Alexis smiled. "Let me get you some water."

"And those pain meds," his head bobbed.

"Yes," Alexis smiled.

Kevin lay back to wait for Alexis.

Alexis returned with the glass of water but no medication. "Where'd you put those pain meds?"

"Um," Kevin motioned to the nightstand.

"Almost bit me, huh," Alexis laughed, suddenly recalling she'd already looked at the prescription.

"Almost," he nodded, accepting the water while Alexis worked open the childproof cap.

"You're gonna be out pretty fast after you take this," Alexis noted. "Anything else we need to talk about before you zonk out?"

"Is there something else we need to talk about?" Kevin raised a curious brow.

"You know I love you?"

"I'm aware," he smiled.

"Then I'm good."

"We'll figure everything else out," Kevin assured her, "I love you too much to ever give up on us."

Alexis climbed over him and got under the covers, having put her pajamas on before getting him some water, "Okay, take your pill and then lie down all the way."

"I'll give it a whirl," he nodded.

Alexis reached over to set the timer on her phone to go off a few hours later, so she'd remember to check up on him and his concussion. Once she was all situated, she began to read her father's book out loud. Kevin likely didn't hear more than a few paragraphs, as he conked out.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin heard his name being whispered into his ear.

"What is it?" Kevin forced his eyes to open.

"It's morning," Alexis smiled. "How do you feel?"

"Like I was run over by a Mack truck," he groaned, "Was I?"

"No, it was a 4x4," Alexis said. "You sore?"

"Everything hurts," he nodded slowly.

"My dad is taking all the kids to Coney Island today. They're picking Sarah Grace up on the way. You get to stay here all day."

"So long as you don't make me move too much, you have yourself a deal," he agreed.

"No problem," Alexis smiled. "You hungry?"

"A little," he nodded, "Have you heard anything on Javi? Is he okay?"

"Is he not supposed to be?" Alexis was taken aback by the question, "You look the brunt of the impact, didn't you?"

"I did," Kevin nodded. "He was still in the car."

"I'll call for an update after I make you breakfast. What sounds good to you?" she asked.

"Nothing that requires a lot of movement."

"Do you want me to whip you up a smoothie?" she asked, "That would only require you holding the glass and sucking on a straw."

"Peanut butter and banana?"

"You got it," she smiled.

Kevin moved to get out of bed, but Alexis stopped him.

"Just stay here," Alexis suggested, "I'll bring breakfast to you."

"Bless you," he sighed.

"What are you, my priest?"

"Curse you?" Kevin teased.

Alexis couldn't help but snicker as she left the bedroom to whip up his breakfast.

Kevin waited in Alexis's very comfortable bed. Just as he closed his eyes, his phone rang.

 _"Hey, Partner, how are you feeling?"_ Javi's cheerful voice greeted him when he answered.

"Sore, so very sore," Kevin groaned. "Why the hell are you so happy?"

 _"The sun is shining and the birds are chirping. It's going to be a good day,"_ Javi responded.

"Maybe for you," Kevin groaned.

 _"Did you and Alexis work things out last night after I dropped you off at her place?"_ he asked.

"We're getting there. Are you at work?"

 _"Yeah,"_ Javier confirmed, _"Doing the paperwork for the insurance agency. Gates is not happy. Apparently there is more paperwork for her when the accident happens while we're on official business. She's especially not happy because this is the second time she's had to fill out the forms for an accident we were in."_

"Neither of them were our fault," Kevin said. "That should count for something."

 _"It was the weirdest sense of déjà vu though,"_ Javier responded.

"Yeah, but last time this happened I didn't get to go home to Lex."

 _"There's a silver lining here,"_ Javi chuckled, _"You get Alexis to tend to you this time."_

"She has a hell of a bedside manner," Kevin smirked.

 _"Too much information,"_ Javier groaned.

"Payback, Bro," Kevin responded, "You said the same thing to me last time in reference to Lanie."

 _"I hate you…so much,"_ Javier told him. _"You want me to stop by later?"_

"To rub in my nose how you're not injured?" Kevin snorted, "No thanks. By the way, I'm driving for the next decade."

 _"You drive like a little old lady,"_ Javier complained.

"But we've never been in an accident with me at the wheel," Kevin countered.

 _"No, but a uniform on foot patrol stopped us."_

"You're making crap up," Kevin scoffed.

 _"I am not,"_ Javier insisted.

"Kev? Breakfast," Alexis held up the smoothie when she walked in.

"I'm hanging up on you," Kevin told his partner before ending the call abruptly and accepted the drink Alexis held out for him.

"Was that Javi?" Alexis asked, "How's he feeling?"

"Oh, he's fine," Kevin shook his head. "Hardly has a scratch on him. Lucky bastard."

"Are we feeling a little resentful?"

"He's able to breathe without pain. You're damn right I'm resentful," Kevin groaned.

"You feel up to a soak in the hot tub? I'll help you get in."

"Sounds like a good idea," Kevin slowly got out of bed.

"Do you have to visit the facilities first?"

"Nah, I'll just go in the hot tub," he gave her a Cheshire grin.

"You'll do nothing of the sort," Alexis turned his shoulders to steer him in the direction of her bathroom.

"I'll go take care of things while you get the hot tub ready," Kevin said.

"Holler if you need assistance," Alexis called after him.

"I will," he promised.

Alexis went to turn on the jets after she stripped off her clothes and slipping into a satin role and then waited patiently for Kevin to emerge from the bathroom.

"Can I get some help getting undressed?" Kevin asked from the doorway.

"Of course," Alexis approached him and helped him out of the undershirt he'd slept in.

"Damn this hurts," Kevin winced.

"I bet, but you're alive," Alexis lightly traced a bruise.

"You have a point," he winced under her gentle touch.

Alexis pulled her fingers away, "Sorry."

"It's okay," he assured her, "I'm willing to endure any pain at your hand if it means you're touching me."

"Hmm," Alexis put her arms gently around his neck. "I'll touch you anytime you want."

"How about dropping these pants for me and then helping me into the hot tub?" he requested, "Maybe these stiff muscles will loosen up."

"Subtle," she nodded with a smile as she undid his belt and opened his pants to slide them down along with his boxers.

Kevin moved slowly until he found his way into the hot tub. Once he was seated, Alexis climbed in behind him. "Are you ready for the jets?"

"Yeah, I think so," Kevin tipped his head back to rest on Alexis's shoulder.

"If it's too much, let me know," Alexis flipped the switch.

Kevin inhaled sharply and then relaxed. The water felt good against his muscles.

"I didn't like getting that call yesterday about you getting into an accident," Alexis confessed, "Try not to make a habit of it."

"I'll do my best," Kevin smiled. "I never want to scare you."

"How'd Sarah Grace handle the news of your accident?" Alexis asked.

"She was a little upset, but I think she's okay," Kevin nodded.

"She's already down one parent. She's likely not keen on losing another," Alexis agreed. "Things like make you think. Have you updated your will? Have you planned on what would happen to her if something happened to you in the line of duty?"

"Is this the single parent in you coming out?"

"It's not easy to realize you're all your kids have," Alexis told him.

"Is your will updated?" he asked.

"Yep," she nodded, "I updated it a few months after Chris died."

"Lex, there is something we need to talk about," Kevin said slowly.

"Hunter," Alexis nodded. "Kev, I don't want to split my children up."

" I get that, but he's my son," Kevin responded.

"Would you be willing to take them all?" Alexis asked.

"I don't know," he frowned.

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "How about living with my dad and Kate?"

"That sounds like a recipe for disaster," he replied.

Alexis sighed, "We'll figure it out."

"Hopefully we never have to," he added.

"Hopefully," she nodded and then motioned around them. "How's this working for you?"

"Still sore, but the muscles are being to loosen up," he responded.

"Good," she smiled and turned his face to hers. She gave him a light kiss.

"Looser still," he dipped in for another kiss.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis sat sideways on the couch, her feet propped on a pillow as she read a book. Kevin was on the other side of the pillow, watching TV while his hand rested lightly on her ankle.

"What are you thinking about, Detective?" Alexis felt his fingers tense slightly.

"Nothing," he shook his head.

"No, not nothing," she looked up. "Talk."

"I got a request yesterday," Kevin admitted.

"From?"

"Jenny," Kevin said.

"What does she want now?" Alexis signed and set her book aside.

"To see Sarah Grace," Kevin leaned back and rolled his head to look at her.

"Have you talked to Sarah Grace about it?" Alexis asked.

"Haven't exactly had the time," Kevin replied.

"Something like this? Kev, you know you have to make the time."

"I was a bit busy getting crunched by a car," he reminded her.

"When did she call?"

"Before the accident," Kevin stated.

"Okay," Alexis nodded, "And before you had the accident, what were you planning to do about the request?"

"I was still mulling things over," Kevin responded.

"And now?"

"Still mulling," he sighed.

"You can't mull forever," Alexis scolded him.

"I know. I just don't know what I want to do about this," Kevin admitted.

Alexis scooted closer and put her legs over Kevin's lap, "It's not just your decision, you know."

"I know," he nodded, "I know Sarah Grace should have some say. I'm worried what kind of effect visiting a place like prison will have on her. They aren't exactly cheery places."

"I know," she picked up his hand. "Jenny's going to be there for a while and no matter what she's done, Sarah Grace deserves some kind of relationship with her mother."

"How about one at a distance?" he suggested, "They could be pen pals."

"Be serious," she scolded him.

"I am," Kevin frowned. "I don't think Sarah Grace should be subjected to that place."

"I know," Alexis nodded. "We want to protect our kids from things we don't think are good for them."

"Are you seriously going to take Jenny's side after what she did to you?" he asked.

"No, I'm taking Sarah Grace's side."

Kevin frowned at her.

"I know it sucks, but it's not just your decision," Alexis said.

"Why should I let Jenny have a vote?" Kevin asked.

"I'm not talking about Jenny, and you know it," Alexis frowned at him.

"She's ten years old," Kevin responded, "Why should I put her in such an impossible situation?"

"Because it's her mother," Alexis reminded him. "My mom sucked as a parent, but Dad always let me decide if I wanted to see her. You gave me great advice about her and my kids. You should use the same advice with Jenny and Sarah Grace."

"I never would have given you that advice if I knew you'd throw it in my face now," he frowned.

"You tell Jenny that she has once chance at this," Alexis told him. "Remind her that Sarah Grace will have other people in her life now, and she's not allowed to make her daughter feel guilty for liking them."

"Yes, because that wouldn't backfire or blow up in my face," Kevin responded sarcastically.

"Hey," she scolded him with a look, "You're a good guy, Kevin. Jenny made a whopper of a mistake, several of them in fact, but Sarah Grace needs to find a way to make peace with her mother, for her own benefit…not Jenny's, not yours, but hers. Be the bigger person, Kevin. Let Sarah Grace decide what is best for her, and be supportive no matter what she decides. If you can't do it, I'll take Sarah Grace to the prison myself."

"If it was Chris, would you take Cade?"

"Yes, I would," Alexis said after a moment. "If Cade wanted to go, I'd take him."

"And Maggie?" Kevin challenged her.

"Once she was old enough, yes," Alexis nodded. "I doubt they'd let a four year old into the prison."

"Good point," Kevin conceded.

"At the end of the day, after the visit, I'm there if you want to talk."

"Fine," he sighed deeply, "I'll talk to Sarah Grace, but if she doesn't want to see Jenny, I don't want you talking her into it."

"I just want her to make the choice," Alexis smiled. "You're doing the right thing, Kevin."

"We'll see about that," he grumbled.

"I'm proud of you," she nudged him with a smile.

Kevin continued to grumble under his breath while Alexis grabbed her book and continued on where she left off.


	54. Chapter 37

Moving right along…

-d-d-d-d-d-

"How's my favorite gremlin?" Esposito greeted Alexis when he and Kevin walked into the morgue.

"I am going to kill my dad," Alexis groaned.

"Is that a metaphorical statement or a literal one?" Javier grinned, "Kev and I are homicide detectives. If it's a literal one, we're going to need to take you into custody."

"Here's a literal one for you. Call me a gremlin again and Lanie's going to have to find someone else to get freaky with."

"Ouch," Javier covered his privates with a file folder he'd brought with him, "You autopsy people have no sense of humor."

"We do too," Alexis frowned at him. "It's just about the response."

"Prove it," Javier challenged.

"Okay. A guy walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a glass of water. The bartender pulls out a shot gun and fires a shot just past the man's ear. The man thanks him, leaves a tip, and exits. Why the thank you? Why the tip?"

"What the hell kind of people were you hanging out with in New Orleans where that was considered funny?"

"See? All about the response," Alexis motioned.

"That's supposed to be funny?" Javi replied, "Seriously these gremlins are just odd, even Lanie. Can't feed them after midnight, go psycho when wet…"

Kevin snorted at the last bit when his mind flashed to a time he and the beautiful M.E. got into it in the rain.

"You still with me, Ryan?" Javier waved a hand in front of Kevin's face.

"Yeah," Kevin cleared his throat. "Just thinking about Lex's joke. Anyway, what have we got?"

"I think you're looking for someone who loved the victim."

"Lex, the guy was shot five times by the same gun," Javier scoffed.

"Exactly. You shoot someone once, you just want them dead. You shoot them five times? That's love."

"I'll keep that in mind," Espo snorted, "Anything else?"

"Yeah. Either of you have an answer for my earlier question about the guy in the bar?"

"There's an answer?" Javier looked to her in bewilderment.

"You're hopeless, Espo," Alexis turned to an open file.

Just as Esposito turned to open the door Kevin walked up next to Alexis, "Lex?"

"Yeah?"

"Guy had the hiccups," he smiled.

Alexis turned and tapped her nose.

"Dinner tonight?" he asked.

"Chinese?"

"Sarah Grace and I'll pick it up on the way to your place," he kissed her cheek before he turned to leave autopsy.

"You're turning into a Gremlin, Detective," Javier told his partner when they walked out.

"I always did like that movie," Kevin smiled.

"And getting Alexis wet?"

"None of your business," Kevin said flatly.

"So the Doc gets freaky when wet. Good to know," Javier assumed by Kevin's lack of response.

"Javi, keep that to yourself, okay? Have some respect for her."

"Always," Esposito turned serious for a brief moment. "You proposing yet?"

"I'm still married. I'm doing it right this time," Kevin said.

"You can be engaged to someone while still married to someone else. There are no laws against that," Javier responded.

"I promised Castle I'd dissolve my marriage to Jenny before I ask Alexis to marry me."

"Then do it already."

"Easier said than done. Jenny's fighting it," Kevin admitted as the two got into the elevator.

"Isn't there somewhere you can go to get a quickie divorce, like the Caymans or something?"

"I don't know if I can do that while she's incarcerated."

"No, I swear I've heard something about getting divorce in the Dominican, I think it is," he responded, "Without the other party having to be there."

"I guess I could," Kevin leaned against the wall. "Can I ask you something?"

"Go for it."

"If I do this, am I a bad guy?"

"Getting divorced so you can be happy?" Javier inquired.

"Sneaking off to do it," Kevin clarified.

"You're doing what needs to be done," Javier responded, "Your wife is in prison for likely the rest of her life for trying to kill the woman you love."

"When Lex and I get married, you're best man," Kevin smiled.

"That's a given," Espo laughed. "Had it been me last time, this whole mess would never have happened. I'm good luck."

Kevin laughed.

"How are the kids handling everything?"

"Better," Kevin nodded. "Hunter and Sarah Grace get along pretty well."

"What about Cade and Maggie? Do they know yet?"

"Cade, yes," Kevin nodded. "Maggie's four. How is Lex supposed to explain the situation to a four year old?"

"Like she would to anyone else," Javier shrugged.

"She's Castle's granddaughter. She'd probably figure it out before any of us."

Javier laughed, "You are turning into a gremlin. You know that, right?"

"If it means me and Lex until the end, then I'll happily turn into a psychotic, fury creature."

"I'm glad for you, Man," Javier smiled. "You look happy."

"Finally feel happy."

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Kevin picked up the phone and waited for Jenny to do the same on the other side of the glass.

Jenny's icy stare sent a shiver down Kevin's spine as she lifted the receiver. "Where's my daughter?"

"At home with my mother," Kevin said calmly. "I wanted to see you first."

"You've kept my daughter from me for months," Jenny hissed, "You have no right to do that."

"Considering what you tried to have done and then what your father tried to have done, do you blame me?"

"I've owned up to my mistake," Jenny snapped at him, "I'm serving thirty years in this hell hole because I didn't want to put Sarah Grace through the turmoil of a trial. I can't control what my father did. I certainly had no knowledge of it. Let me see my daughter, or I'm going to get a court order. I'm her mother. I still have rights."

"Jenny, I'm here because Sarah Grace wants to see you, but we have to talk first," Kevin said. "I'm grateful you love Sarah Grace enough not to take this to trial. I wish your father was that considerate."

"Get to the point, Kevin," Jenny spat.

"There are some restrictions to you and Sarah Grace spending time together."

"Yeah, there's a thick wall of glass between us. That's pretty obvious," she tapped at it with her knuckles.

"I meant conversation wise," Kevin told her.

"You don't get to dictate what I discuss with Sarah Grace," she snarled at him, "You lost any bargaining chips you had when you started doing the horizontal mambo with that bimbo of yours...Tell me, Kevin, how long after I was arrested did it take her to wrap those spindly little legs around you again?"

"Alright Jen, if that's how it's going to be, Sarah Grace will be here when she can drive herself," Kevin went to hang up the phone.

"Wait," Jenny halted him.

"I'm listening," he put the phone back to his ear.

"I just want to see her," Jenny was nearly in tears, "I want to...I need to..." She took a deep breath to gain a hold on her emotions. "She's all I have left, Kevin. I'm going to be over sixty years old by the time I can get out of here. She's going to be married and a mother by then, and I'm going to miss all of that. I just want to be as much a part of her life as she'll allow."

"She misses you, Jenny. She wants to see you. No matter what went down with us, you're still her mother. I don't want to mess with that, but you can't try twisting her into knots," Kevin said. "I'm going to be with someone else. You don't have to like it or accept it, but that's the way things are."

Tears welled in Jenny's eyes at the thought that Kevin was moving on so quickly.

"I'm sorry, Jenny. I should have been honest with you when things first started to go bad all those years ago. I should have had the courage to end what was making us both miserable."

"I loved you," Jenny said.

"I loved you, too," Kevin nodded. "But it was over a long time ago, Jenny."

"What went wrong?" she asked, "How did we get to this point?"

"I don't know," Kevin shook his head. "I wish I did, but I don't."

"Was I not pretty enough for you? Not smart enough? Not what?" she pressed, "What didn't I have that made you look outside our marriage?"

"I didn't go looking for anything, Jenny. The first time I realized I wanted more than friendship from Alexis, I ran as fast as I could."

"Then how did she end up in your bed?" Jenny pressed, "Damn it, Kevin, what was it?"

"You and I grew apart," Kevin snapped at her.

"So what happens when you grow apart with this new girl?" Jenny asked.

"Jenny, I'm still in love with her after eight years apart," Kevin told her. "You and I were together every day, and we couldn't make it work."

"She kept you from your son," she reminded him.

"You kept me from my son," Kevin responded calmly, "You chased her away with threats of taking Sarah Grace from me."

"You would've left us eventually," Jenny told him.

"I still would have been Sarah Grace's father."

"Until she'd popped out a couple of your mutts," Jenny's venom came back out, "Then you would have forgotten all about our daughter."

"Is this really the woman I married?" Kevin looked at her in disbelief, "How could I have been so wrong about you?"

"I thought you were the faithful type. Looks like we were both wrong," Jenny said coldly.

"Jenny, I'm sorry. I never wanted to hurt you."

"Well, you did."

"So did you," Kevin returned, "You nearly left three kids orphaned. Do you know that?"

"I want to see my daughter," Jenny closed off all further discussion.

"And you can, but there will be restrictions," Kevin nodded.

"Fine," she sighed dramatically, "What are your damn restrictions?"

"You don't badmouth anyone," Kevin started. "You don't blame anyone for your predicament."

"So no quips about your little tartlet, got it."

"Jenny, I mean it," Kevin said firmly. "I get any kind of feeling you are trying to twist Sarah Grace around to make her feel guilty for liking the people in my life, you will never see her again."

"You can't do that," Jenny responded.

"Yes, I can. Judges aren't likely to side with a woman in jail."

"They've sided with me so far," Jenny taunted him, "We're still married, aren't we?"

"Not for much longer," Kevin told her.

"Let me see my daughter," Jenny demanded again, "I'll do whatever you ask, just let me see her."

"I'll bring her in a week or so," Kevin said. "I have something to take care of this week. Once it's done, we'll be back."

"Thank you," she replied.

"You're welcome," he said. "Take care of yourself, Jenny."

Jenny hung up the phone and turned her back on him.

-d-d-d-d-

"You gonna tell me how it went?" Javier asked his partner who had yet to say two words since he'd gotten into the car after leaving the prison.

"It went as well as it could have," Kevin growled.

"Where am I taking you?" Javier asked. "Home?"

"Yeah, but I need you to wait."

"Wait for what?" Javier looked to him in confusion.

"I need to pack a bag. You're taking me to the airport."

"Off to the Dominican?" Javi asked.

"I want my marriage to be over with," Kevin nodded.

"About damn time, Partner," Javier responded.

They drove to Kevin's mom's place, and he quickly packed a few things before telling Bridget where he was going. Then he got back in the car with Javi.

"I need to make a call," Kevin took his cell phone out and dialed as his partner drove.

" _Hello?"_

"Hey, Lex," Kevin smiled.

" _Hey, you,"_ Alexis's voice cheered him right up, _"How's your day been going?"_

"I've had better," Kevin admitted. "Look, I just wanted to let you know I'm taking a little trip."

" _A little trip to where?"_ she asked, _"I thought we were taking the kids to the Jersey Shore this weekend."_

"I'll be back by the weekend," he promised. "There's something I need to get done, and I want it over with."

" _Do I get a hint?"_ she asked sweetly.

"Let's just say, it's been a long time coming. I love you, Alexis."

" _I love you, Kevin,"_ she sighed, _"Travel safe."_

"I will. I'll call you tonight."

"Why didn't you tell her what you're up to?" Javier inquired as he navigated the New York City traffic.

"I want to tell her when I ask her to be my wife."

"So you're going to say, 'Hey, Baby, I'm divorced, so let's get hitched'?"

"No, I'm going to show a little more finesse than that."

"I would hope so," Javier snorted.

"How about you taking the plunge, Partner?" Kevin suggested, "You and Lanie could join us in a double wedding."

"Lanie and I decided a long time ago we weren't the marrying kind of couple."

"Coward," Kevin shook his head in amusement.

"Bite me," Javier muttered.

"Lanie's mad at you again, isn't she?" Kevin asked.

"Don't want to talk about it," Espo shut down their line of conversation.

"What'd you do?" Kevin asked.

"It was nothing," Javi responded.

"You didn't cheat on her, did you?"

"No," Javier said. "Not that I could, seeing as how we're not exclusive."

"Who'd you flirt with?"

"I didn't," he insisted.

"What did you do?" Kevin pressed.

"I said something during the heat of the moment that I shouldn't have," Javier responded.

"What did you..." Kevin suddenly realized what he'd said, "You told her that you loved her."

"Shut up," Javier grumbled.

"Oh man! You did," Kevin laughed. "And what? Now you want to take it back?"

"Oh look, we're here," Javier stopped the car.

"Double wedding here we come," Kevin pulled out his bag in the same motion as he spoke because he knew his partner would peel out.

=d=d=d=

"Men are scum," Lanie said when Kate and Alexis walked into autopsy.

"Sorry, can't agree today," Alexis smiled. "You ready to go?"

"Men are scum," Lanie repeated.

"What did Javi do?" Alexis asked.

"He's being a guy," Lanie grumbled.

"Rick does that all the time."

"Come on, Boss, first round is on me," Alexis tugged at her boss's shoulder, "Dead people will still be here when we get back in the morning."

"And we will listen to you bitch about Javi all night if you want. Rick has all the kids at the loft."

"Yeah, let's go," Lanie agreed while shedding her coat.

 _deet-deet_

"Hang on, that's me," Alexis said. "I'll catch up with you in a few."

"Don't take too long," Lanie replied, "I need to get my drink on in a hurry."

"Be right there," Alexis promised. "Hello?"

" _How's my favorite M.E.?"_

"I'd be better if my favorite detective wasn't on some mysterious vacay," she replied.

" _My reasons will become clear when I get home. I promise,"_ Kevin smiled.

"Well, since you're out of town, the ladies are having a girls' night," she announced, "I'd be worried if I was you. We've discussed exotic dancing as an option."

" _Yeah, I don't see you guys as the exotic dancing type,"_ Kevin smirked. _"And if you are, I want a lap dance this weekend."_

"Deal," she giggled, "Trip going okay?"

" _Yeah. I won't be long,"_ Kevin said. _"Stay safe tonight, okay?"_

"I will if you will," she responded.

" _I love you,"_ Kevin told her. _"I'll call you tomorrow?"_

"You better. I love you, too."

" _Come on, Doctor,"_ Kate called out, _"We're wasting time."_

"The mistress beckons," Alexis giggled. "Night."

" _Night."_

"So I'm the mistress now," Kate laughed as she linked arms with her stepdaughter,

"Dad told about one of your early cases," Alexis smiled. "Mistress Venom?"

"Oh God. Why does he tell you these things?" Kate groaned.

"He has no filter," Alexis reminded Kate.

Lanie giggled as she listened to her friends, "Come on. Let's get our drunk on."

"Lead the way," Alexis replied.

-d-d-d-

Alexis pulled her hair back as she got ready for bed a few nights later. Just as she was about to turn off the light, her cell phone rang.

"Hello?"

" _Open your front door,"_ Kevin told her.

"Are you back?" she gave an exciting little squeal.

" _Open your door and find out,"_ he said.

Alexis left her room and walked quickly and quietly across the apartment. She unlocked the door and opened it to a smiling Kevin.

"Welcome home, Detective," she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him long and hard.

"I missed you," he said when she let him up for air.

"Missed you more," she dove in for a second kiss.

"Not possible," Kevin laughed.

"Come to bed," she asked.

"You don't have to ask me twice," he willingly allowed her to pull him to her bedroom.


	55. Chapter 38

Enjoy and reply guys. Sorry it took so long.

-d-d-d-d-

"I can do this by myself," Kevin offered when he and Alexis walked towards Martha's studio. "You can go to your place, and I'll meet you there."

"No," she shook her head, "Gram always told me to face my fears."

Kevin let go of her hand and put his arm around her shoulders, placing a kiss to her forehead as they walked, "You're one of the bravest women I know."

"Not always. I still won't watch _Blair Witch Project_ alone."

"Neither will I," he snorted.

Alexis smiled at him, "Thanks for coming with me. I know this place probably isn't your favorite after what happened."

"We had some good times too," he kissed her forehead a second time.

"Yeah," Alexis smiled.

When they arrived, Kevin unlocked the door and saw the hesitation on Alexis's face, "I can get the boxes by myself."

"No," Alexis shook her head. "I'll be okay."

"We don't have to do this," Kevin reminded her, "Your father said he could do it."

"Dad hasn't been inside this place since Gram died. I can't make him come here just because I want to avoid it."

"We could hire someone to do this," he replied.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "I am not running away from this."

"Then after you," he motioned her inside.

"Thanks," she entered the lobby and walked towards the auditorium door.

She took a deep breath while pushing the door open.

The police tape was gone, the bullet holes repaired, and the skylight had been replaced, but the couch Alexis had been sitting on before the rescue was still tipped over from when she dove off during the gunfire. She stopped just short of the front row of seats.

"You okay?" he nudged her gently.

"Yeah," she looked around. "Gram loved this place."

"I'm kinda fond of it myself," Kevin smiled.

"Really?" she looked at him doubtfully.

"Hey, some pretty important moments in our lives happened here."

"Name two where sex wasn't involved," she challenged him.

"You telling me face-to-face you loved me for the first time," Kevin reminded her.

"And then we had sex," she stated, "Next."

"Not here," Kevin shook his head. She was obviously recalling a different memory. "All we did that day was kiss. It was also the first place I told you I loved you."

"Then I ran for my life," Alexis said. "If you only knew how close I was to turning around and saying it back."

"I wish you had, but that's all in the past," he smiled while brushing a lock of hair behind her ear.

Alexis crossed the space to stand at the edge of the stage. She ran her hand along the wood and smiled a little as she looked over her shoulder, "Second time. You remember?"

"How about a refresher?" he gave her a flirtatious wink.

She put her hand out for his. He took it and she pulled him closer, "Right on the edge of the stage. Half-clothed. Do you realize anyone could have walked in on us?"

"It was worth the risk," he laughed.

"Even if it had been my dad?"

"I would've died very happy," Kevin smiled.

"I would have died of mortification," she replied.

"I am still amazed you let me that close to you," Kevin confessed.

"It was always worth it."

"Even the time I had to hide in your closet?"

"Beckett would have shot you," Alexis laughed.

"Probably should have," he grinned.

Alexis pulled herself up on stage, and Kevin stood between her legs, hands on her calves, "I keep trying to pinpoint the moment we conceived Hunter. I think it was the time we got stuck on the roof of my dad's building."

"I thought we were going to get soaked. Those rain clouds were moving in fast."

Alexis's eyes turned sad while she played with Kevin's hand, "Gram was gone a month later. Two days after her funeral, I was halfway through dialing your number when Jenny knocked on my door."

"That was the day," he tensed at his estranged wife's name.

"That was the day she told me to get the hell away from you or she'd take Sarah Grace from you."

"I wish you'd told me about her threat," he kissed her palm softly.

"If she didn't seem so completely serious, I would have. If I'd thought for even a second she wouldn't go through with it, I would've finished dialing your number and asked you to come over."

"Since she contested the divorce I've gone the contested route, but with a little luck…" he trailed off. He didn't want to tell Alexis about the divorce until he had a chance to talk to his daughter. Fortunately Alexis picked up on the conversation all on her own.

"She's in jail," Alexis raised an eyebrow. "Why is she fighting this?"

"Because she wants to make my life miserable," he sighed, "Because I already ruined her life."

"Hey," Alexis framed his face with her hands, "Don't listen to her, okay? You and I made a choice. It wasn't the brightest move either of us made, but you didn't ruin her life. You sacrificed a lot of years and probably a good part of your soul staying with her so your daughter could have a whole family. When you decided to divorce her, she's the one who took the homicidal route. She ruined her own life."

"I'm not apologizing for what we did, not to you."

"Good," Alexis leaned back on her elbows and smiled at him, "Because I'm not sorry."

Kevin smirked, "Oh really?"

"Really," Alexis nodded.

Kevin's hands ran up her legs to rest on her hips, "Is this an invitation, Dr. LaSalle?"

"More of a come on, Detective Ryan," Alexis smiled.

"Oh really?" Kevin smiled.

"Yes, you were on the bottom last time," Alexis smiled. "Wanna take the top?"

"Are you keeping track now?" he chuckled while pulling her off the stage.

"Just of the more memorable times," Alexis admitted. "Going at it on the stage, definitely memorable."

"So you like to perform, huh," he swept her into his arms and carried her up the stairs.

"Only for certain audiences," Alexis smiled before she noticed Kevin was going backstage. "Where are you going?"

"I'm searching out a comfortable surface," he replied, "If memory serves, there is a very comfy bed backstage."

"I think you're right," Alexis nodded. "Looking to reinvent a certain night?"

"We're not as young as we once were," he laughed, "I'm looking more for a place which will hurt less if I fall asleep."

Alexis burst out laughing.

"Besides," Kevin placed her gently on the bed, "I really want to have you on this bed."

"Yeah, me too," Alexis began to unbutton his shirt.

"Maybe we can keep it somewhere," Kevin smiled as he slipped his hands under Alexis's shirt.

"My storage unit still has space," she pushed his shirt off his shoulders before aiding him in removing hers.

"In that case, I'll call the movers," Kevin smiled as Alexis lay down and moved over her.

"Deal," she smiled. "Now kiss me."

"Deal," Kevin smiled.

Alexis sighed happily when Kevin kissed her thoroughly.

=f=f=f=f=

"Wow," Alexis looked at the ceiling after she and Kevin came back to themselves.

"I hope that's a good wow," Kevin kissed her shoulder.

"It is," Alexis nodded. "Why didn't we ever do that here before?"

"Because we were young and stupid," he laughed.

"Speak for yourself, Detective," she scoffed, "I was just young."

"Funny," Kevin lay on his side and picked up her hand. "Are you feeling better about this place?"

"Yeah, to put it mildly."

"Still okay with your dad selling it?"

"I don't know," Alexis looked around them. "This place may hold some good memories, but the bad memories are really bad."

"Yeah, I know, but the good memories are really good," he nodded.

"Yeah," Alexis rolled onto her side to face him and lightly traced his chin with her fingertips.

Kevin dove in for a kiss which left them both breathless. "I love you, Alexis."

"I love you, too," she said as she pushed him onto his back. "Shall I prove it?"

"I don't think we have anything to prove anymore, but perhaps we should remind each other," he willingly allowed her to pin him to the bed.

Alexis pulled the sheet away and pressed her body to his again.

Kevin groaned at the contact.

"Are you slowing down on me, Detective?" she grinned.

"Not on your life," he said.

"Now I think there is something to prove," she challenged him.

"In that case," Kevin rolled her over, "Allow me."

-d-d-d-

Alexis was pulling on her jeans when Kevin kissed her shoulder.

"Don't even start," she smiled. "We have to go, and you know it."

"We don't have to," he chuckled.

"Yes, we do," Alexis nodded. "We're having dinner with our parents, all of them."

"Whose fault is that?" Kevin glared at her while pulling his shirt back on.

"You try saying no to your mother," Alexis frowned.

"I have," he replied, "Very successfully, in fact."

"You're the one who said yes to Kate," Alexis pointed out.

"Fair enough," Kevin sighed, "We'd better grab a couple of these boxes."

"Yeah," Alexis looked around them and ran her hand along the edge of the bed.

"We'll get the bed another time," Kevin vowed.

Alexis laughed, "I'm just thinking of other beds and other times."

"Care to revisit those?"

"Dinner. My dad, Kate, your mother, and Jim," Alexis reminded him.

Kevin groaned in disappointment while grabbing a nearby box.

"We'll get around to those," she assured him.

"Promise?"

"Yes. In fact, if my bed was still in the loft, I'd suggest we sneak up there tonight."

0=0=0=0=0=0

"Who would have thought Kate's dad was so funny?" Bridget spoke when Kevin let them into her apartment. "She always seems so straight laced and serious."

"Kate can actually be very funny," Kevin said.

"I like Mr. Beckett," Sarah Grace said. "He's nice."

"Yes, he is," Kevin confirmed, "It's almost bedtime Sarah Grace. I'll be right in to tuck you in."

"Okay," Sarah Grace nodded and hugged her grandmother, whispering something that made Bridget giggle.

"What's that all about?" Kevin looked to his mother curiously.

"A little girl talk," Bridget waved her son off.

"Not buying it."

"Sarah Grace may have overheard Jim ask me to a movie," Bridget admitted. "She was just telling me to have fun."

"A movie, huh," Kevin frowned. "New information to me. Am I expected to be okay with this?"

Bridget patted her son's face, "You're expected to not pass judgment on my choices as I am a grown woman."

"I need to tell Sarah Grace about my trip this week, but I don't know how she's going to take it," Kevin decided to change the subject.

"It'll be okay," Bridget patted his shoulder. "Go on. No sense in putting off the inevitable."

"Do I bribe her with chocolate?" he asked.

"Not if you want her to sleep tonight," Bridget laughed.

"Right," Kevin nodded. "Night, Mom."

"Good night, Son," Bridget kissed his cheek and then disappeared into her bedroom.

Kevin took a deep breath and walked to Sarah Grace's room. He knocked and then poked his head in, "Hey, Sweetie. You ready for bed?"

"Yeah," she was just climbing into bed, "I'm looking forward to our trip this weekend."

"Me, too," Kevin nodded as he sat down on her bed. "Sweetie, I need to tell you something."

"Okay," Sarah Grace scooted over a bit to make more room for him on the bed.

"I went away this week to take care of something important, and I'm not sure how you're going to feel about it."

"I won't know until you tell me," Sarah Grace replied.

"You know your mom isn't being cooperative about the divorce, right?"

"Yeah, she was being stubborn...at least that's what Grandma says," Sarah Grace nodded.

"Right," Kevin nodded. "I decided I was tired of waiting and decided to take matters into my own hands. I went to the Dominican and divorced your mom."

"Where is that?" Sarah Grace asked.

"It's an island in the Caribbean," Kevin explained, "I went there because they have certain laws which allow a divorce to happen even if one person doesn't agree."

"So, you and Mom aren't married anymore?"

"No," he shook his head, "I still have to give her the papers, but we're no longer married. I know that's a lot to process for you, but I wanted you to be the first person I told."

"You didn't tell Alexis yet?" Sarah Grace looked surprised.

"No, not yet," Kevin shook his head.

"How come?" she asked.

"Well, I wanted you to know first because I thought you deserved to know."

"Oh," Sarah Grace replied, "So what happens now? Now that you're not married to mom, does that mean you'll be getting married to Alexis?"

"Not yet," Kevin shook his head. "We want to make sure you guys are ready to live together first."

"Does that mean we're all moving in together now?" Sarah Grace asked.

"We're gonna talk about it first."

"If we're moving, do I have to change schools?" she asked.

"Alexis wants to move to Brooklyn. She wants a neighborhood and a house for her kids. She also wants you to stay in your school."

"Am I going to have to share a room with Maggie?"

"We haven't worked out all the details yet, but we're going to try to make this as easy a transition as possible for all of you," Kevin kissed her forehead, "Now it's bedtime. I can answer all your questions at dinner tomorrow night. Remember it's just the two of us because Grandma is going out."

Sarah Grace smiled happily and snuggled down into bed, "Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"Be happy for Grandma," she said.

"I'm trying," he gave her a smile and then bent down to kiss her once more after making sure she was tucked in nice and tight.

"Night," she said as Kevin turned off the lights.

"Sleep well, Sweetheart," Kevin closed the door.


	56. Chapter 39

Here you go. Thanks for the groovy replies. Let's get some more.

-d-d-d-

Javier entered the morgue and found Alexis sitting on a table with a magazine open on her lap. The redhead wasn't paying attention to the magazine or anything around her.

"It's none of my business really, but shouldn't a medical examiner be examining dead bodies instead of reading _Cosmo_ on taxpayer's time?" Javier teased her.

Alexis looked up. Startled by his presence, the magazine slipped from her lap and landed with a thud on the floor, "Where'd you come from?"

"Born and raised right here in N-Y-C," he grinned proudly, "Didn't know you cared so much about my background."

"What?" Alexis looked at him blankly. He could have been speaking in a foreign tongue at the moment. She didn't understand a word he spoke. "Espo, when did you get here?"

"Lex, is everything alright?" Javier studied her closely. She was usually up for a little playful banter.

"No," Alexis shook her head. "Uh, if you're looking for Lanie, she left a few minutes ago. She said something about a glass of wine and a hot bath. If you beg, she might let you join her."

"I'll go once you tell me you're okay," he pressed, "Anything you need to talk about?"

"Have you ever heard of the Broussard family?" she asked quietly.

"Sorry, don't ring any bells," he shook his head slowly. "Should it?"

"They're a mob family in New Orleans," Alexis began slowly.

"Lex, did they have something to do with Chris's death?"

"Most of the older generations are either dead or in jail, but there was procreation of course," Alexis said.

"Alexis?"

"They were connected to this psychopath at one point named Baitfish. He could make a pretty good bomb. Fortunately, he took a bullet to the skull. Unfortunately, his technology didn't die with him."

"Lex," Javier tried to get her attention. Her eyes were unfocused. She was lost in a memory now. His hand twitched to his phone to call Kevin.

"I was standing across the street examining the body of a cop when the building blew," she said.

"And Chris was inside," Javier concluded.

Alexis nodded and held up her phone, "Meredith, Chris's old partner, and Laurel, King's daughter, have called me today."

"What did they have to say?" Javier's hand twitched to his phone again. This time he began dialing. Alexis needed more than just someone to talk to at the moment.

"I don't know. I haven't called back yet," she admitted. "King went off the rails when Chris died."

"Kev, it's Javi. Finish whatever paperwork you're working on later. Get down to Autopsy. Lex needs you," Javier spoke to his partner before he returned his attention to the distraught woman before him, "Why haven't you called back?"

"I don't want to hear he's dead."

"Do you want me to call for you?" Javier offered.

"No, thank you," Alexis shook her head.

"Why don't you let me take you for coffee or something?"

"No," she shook her head a second time, "I have work to do."

"I think Lanie will understand if you leave some for tomorrow."

"Yeah, okay," she finally conceded, "I could use an espresso."

"Come on," Javier took her by the arm and texted Kevin with the other hand.

"You're a good friend, do you know that?" she managed a slight smile.

"I try."

-d-d-d-

"Mind if I join you?" Kevin smiled when he approached the table where Alexis and Javier were sitting.

"Kevin, what are you doing here?" she rose from her feet and hugged him.

"I'm a cop. I'm doing what cops do. We drink coffee and eat donuts," Kevin kissed her lightly before he looked at Javier with a mock glare, "You trying to make time with my girl?"

"Nah, just wanted coffee," Javier grabbed his cup, "I'd better take off. I heard something about Lanie and a hot bath. I wanna see if there's room for two."

"Bye, Javi," Alexis smiled, "Thanks."

"No problem," he smiled.

"What's up?" Kevin claimed Javier's seat, "You're looking a little unfocused."

"I got a couple of voicemails today I'm not sure I want to return."

"Calls from whom?" he pressed, taking her hands into his. He began to rub them vigorously when he felt how cold they were.

"Meredith, Chris's old partner and King's daughter, Laurel," Alexis smiled at his actions.

"And what did they want?"

"I don't know. I haven't called back yet."

"Because you don't want to get bad news," he concluded.

"I can't take any more bad news right now," she nodded, "It's been a bad year already."

"Why do you think it'll be bad news?"

"King went off the rails when Chris died. It's part of the reason I let Dad talk me into moving back here. I love King, but I didn't want to be around him anymore at that point."

"Because he was dangerous to you?" he frowned in confusion.

"No," she shook her head quickly, "He was hell bent on catching the person or people who killed Chris, and he didn't really care who got in his way while he did it."

"You didn't want your kids in the crossfire," Kevin nodded.

"Can you blame me?"

"Not at all," Kevin shook his head. "Maybe it's good news."

"I almost would rather never knowing," she frowned.

"Give me your phone," Kevin said with his hand out.

"What for?" she looked to him in confusion.

"Who's better to talk to?"

"Meredith," Alexis said giving him the phone.

Kevin quickly scrolled through her contacts until he found who he was looking for and then dialed.

" _Hello?_ "

"Meredith Brody?"

 _"Yes,"_ she stated hesitantly. She recognized the phone number as her deceased partner's wife by the caller id, but the voice was not what she expected, _"Is Alexis alright?"_

"She's fine," Kevin took Alexis's hand. "She got your message, but she was a little nervous about calling you back. I did it for her."

 _"And who are you?"_ Meredith asked.

"My name is Detective Kevin Ryan. I'm a friend of Alexis's."

" _If you're allowed to use her phone, I'd wager you are more than a friend_ ," Meredith snorted.

"We're working on that," Kevin smiled at Alexis. "She's a little panicked because you and Laurel called her. Is King alright?"

" _Yes, he's fine. I was calling to give Alexis good news. We got Lorenzo Broussard. He's dead."_

"And he would be the man who…" Kevin didn't really want to finish his sentence with Alexis sitting in front of him.

" _Set the bomb? Yes,_ " Meredith confirmed.

"Why didn't King call?"

" _He got the guy, but he still feels guilty because he's the one who sent Chris into the building. In his head, he left three children fatherless_ ," Meredith explained. _"Tell Alexis I say 'hi' and to keep in touch, okay_?"

"I will," Kevin agreed as he hung up. He looked at Alexis. "He's okay, Lex. They were calling to tell you they got the guy who killed Christopher."

Alexis let out a suppressed sob as her hand covered her mouth.

"Come on, let's get you home," Kevin stood up and got Alexis to her feet before he led her out of the café.

-d-d-d-d-

"You want to talk about it?" Kevin inquired when Alexis keyed herself into her home. She'd been extremely quiet on the ride over.

Alexis sat down on the couch and leaned back, her feet resting on the coffee table, "What's the darkest thought you've ever had?"

Kevin sat down next to her, "Does being glad someone was dead count?"

"Do I want to hear the rest of this?"

"What did your dad tell you about Jerry Tyson?"

"The serial killer?" Alexis nodded. "Just that he was fixated on Beckett after she almost caught him."

"He got the drop on me during our first go around and stole my service weapon," Kevin rested his head next to hers. "He sold it on the black market, and it was used to kill a woman. I blamed myself for a long time for not being quicker. Javi shot him after he and his girlfriend kidnapped Beckett. When I realized he was dead, all I could think was 'Good'."

"I know Dad sleeps better knowing he's not around to hurt anyone else," Alexis replied.

"I was glad a man was dead, Lex," Kevin shook his head.

"I wished a man dead too," Alexis admitted.

"I'd say you had good reason."

"My reason doesn't matter," Alexis shook her head.

He turned to look at her, "Look at me. We think things in the back of our heads we'd never say out loud. It doesn't make us bad people."

"He took away my husband and the father of my children," Alexis started to tear up, "They ask about him all the time. Maggie still thinks Chris is going to walk in the door from his trip to Heaven."

"Baby, I'm so sorry," Kevin cupped the side of her face, kissed her forehead before he held her close.

"I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this," she replied.

"There is no right or wrong, Lex," Kevin assured her.

"I've wanted him to pay every day since he took Chris, but now that he has…now that he's dead, I'm thinking he got off too easy."

"Lex, don't get mad at me, but you have you thought of talking to someone about this?"

"I'm not mad because, yes, I have," Alexis admitted. "I made an appointment last week."

"I can go with you if you'd like."

"Maybe you could pick me up afterwards and take me to dinner?"

"Just tell me when and where," he kissed her cheek softly.

"Right now, my hot tub," she smiled. "You interested?"

"Sign me up," he smirked, "Sarah Grace is with my mother tonight. I'm yours for as long as you need me."

"Come on," Alexis took his hand and pulled him up. "We're alone for the night."

"Lead the way."

=d=d=d=d=d=

Alexis sighed and leaned back against Kevin. The breeze was cooling off as it rustled her hair just a bit.

"That's a long sigh there, Dr. LaSalle," Kevin noted, "You want to talk?"

"No," Alexis shook her head, "Not tonight anyway. I just want to pretend the world is a safe and happy place for a few hours."

"It's safe and happy when we're together like this," Kevin wrapped his arms around her shoulders and kept her close.

Alexis smiled and let her head fall back against Kevin's shoulder, smiling when she felt his fall forward, letting his chin rest on her shoulder.

"Tell me something about you," she said.

"Something about me," he repeated, "Like what?"

"Tell me how your day was," she clarified.

"Oh," he replied, "Well, we've been working a case. As always it comes with a mound of paperwork. Naturally, Javi is sticking me with the dirty work."

"You've got the better handwriting," Alexis smirked. "Is this a tricky one or is it straightforward?"

"Straightforward," Kevin replied, "Bad guy did the deed. We caught him and locked him up. He confessed. It's his third strike. He's likely going away for a very long time."

"One more scumbag off the streets," Alexis smiled, "My hero."

"It's days like today where I feel like I'm actually making a difference," Kevin agreed.

"Kev, are you okay? You seem like you're holding something back. You know you don't have to do that with me, right?"

"I know," he smiled a little.

"Is Jenny still giving you trouble?"

"She's been on me about bringing Sarah Grace to see her," he admitted, "That's really the only trouble she can give me these days."

"Not true," Alexis said. "What about her refusal to sign the divorce papers?"

"Right," Kevin responded, "About those papers…remember the trip I took before the weekend on the Jersey shore with the kids?"

"The one where we were going to discuss moving in together with the kids, but we both chickened out?"

"That's the one," Kevin nodded. "I wanted to wait for the right time to tell you this and nows seems like a good time. It might cheer you up."

"I'm listening," Alexis looked at him.

"Well, after my last visit with Jenny, I didn't see a way where she was going to cooperate, so I took matters into my own hands. I flew down to the Dominican Republic and got a quickie divorce. Jenny got the papers early this week," he replied.

Alexis stared at him for a moment before smiling a little, "You're divorced?"

"I'm divorced," he nodded.

"Oh my God," Alexis splashed water in her surprise.

"Lex?"

"I'm okay," she nodded. "I'm a little surprised, but I'm okay."

"I didn't mean to spring this on you," he replied, "I was going to wait a bit to tell you, but we're one step closer to our future together."

Alexis nodded and turned in his arms to put hers around his neck, "I love you. Tomorrow night we talk to the kids."

"It's a date," he replied, " I love you too."

"Wanna go celebrate?" she motioned towards the bedroom.

"Do we need to relocate to celebrate?" he raised a curious brow.

"Not if you don't want wine," she shook her head.

"I can do without wine," he replied.

"We'll save it for later," she nodded before she kissed him.


	57. Chapter 40

"Are you nervous?" Alexis asked Kevin as she sat on her bed watching him pace.

"A little," he bit at his thumbnail, "The weekend seemed to go pretty well, but the four of them together all the time…it could be a disaster of epic proportions."

"Siblings fight," Alexis said. "You fought with your sisters, right? Chris fought with his brother and sisters. You, Javi, Dad, and Beckett fight."

"Yeah, but it's different when it's step siblings," Kevin replied, "Feelings can get hurt mighty quick and reversing the damage is much harder."

"Did you read a book or something?" Alexis eyed him suspiciously.

"I might have glanced at a few web pages," Kevin admitted.

Alexis smiled and got up on her knees, motioning him over.

"Are we horrible people for thinking this could ever work?" he asked.

"No," she looped her arms around his neck and smiled. "We're optimistic people. There are worse things to be."

"Are we in agreement we'll be moving to Brooklyn?" Kevin asked, "I don't want to tell them something and then tell them something else later."

"Yes," she nodded, "Brooklyn is the ideal location for us. It's more likely to have all the must haves I'm looking for in my next home and still be able to afford groceries."

Kevin smiled, "I kinda love you, you know?"

"I had an inkling," Alexis smiled.

"I suppose we should get this over with," he sighed.

"We're not walking to our execution," Alexis snorted, "We're just merging our living situations."

"I know, I know," Kevin nodded. "Okay. Let's go."

Alexis hopped off her bed and took his hand, "It'll be fine."

They went into the living room where the kids were playing a game.

"Guys?" Alexis called. "We need to talk."

"Are we in trouble?" Maggie darted over.

"Should you be?" Alexis eyed her daughter curiously.

"No," Maggie shook her head from side to side vigorously, "I'm an angel, remember?"

"You've been listing to Grandpa again, haven't you?" Alexis laughed.

"Grandpa's always right," Maggie nodded.

"Now I know you've been listening to Grandpa," Kevin snorted.

"No, you guys aren't in trouble," Alexis ushered the rest of the kids to the dining room table. "Kevin and I want to talk to you."

"What about?" Hunter asked.

"Well, we all had a good time at the shore, right?" Alexis began after taking a deep breath.

"Are we moving to the shore?" Maggie asked.

"No, we're not moving there," Alexis laughed, "It would be a really long commute to work for both me and Kevin."

"Oh," Maggie frowned. She was such a beach bunny and would have loved to have it as her backyard.

"But we would like to move to Brooklyn," Alexis said.

"Where's that, Mommy?" Maggie monopolized the conversation like usual.

"It's where I live," Sarah Grace said.

"Oh, is it far away?" Maggie asked Sarah Grace.

"No," Sarah Grace shook her head.

"We wouldn't just be moving, guys," Alexis said. "Kevin and I want to know how you'd feel about living together."

"All of us?" Hunter asked.

"Yes," Alexis nodded.

"What about my school?" Hunter asked, "Can I still go?"

"Absolutely," Alexis confirmed.

"Good," Hunter smiled.

"One of the good parts about us moving is we'll have a yard again like we did in New Orleans," Alexis continued, "That means we can get a basketball hoop."

"Yes!" Cade smiled.

"I knew you'd like that," Alexis smiled at her middle child.

"Do we have to share rooms?" Sarah Grace looked nervously towards Maggie, her potential roommate.

"We're going to try and make it so you don't," Alexis nodded. "I know how used to your own space you are, Sarah Grace."

"Are you getting married?" Maggie asked.

"Not yet," Kevin admitted quietly.

"How come we're going to live together then?" Maggie pressed, "Don't you have to be married to play house?"

"We want to make sure we can live together before we make it legal," Alexis said.

"Are we still going to be able to see Grandpa all the time?" Maggie asked.

"Are you kidding me?" Alexis pulled Maggie into her lap. "Your grandpa would never let anything keep him from you guys. He'd walk barefoot over the Brooklyn Bridge in the middle of winter just to have a tea party with you."

"Good," Maggie replied.

Kevin smiled at Maggie's relief and then looked at the boys, "You guys okay with this?"

"I guess," Hunter shrugged.

"If you guys have a problem with this, I want to know," Alexis said. "We want to know"

"We've already moved once this year," Hunter replied, "I don't want to have to pack it all up again."

"Right," Alexis nodded. "I get that, but Hunter, this was never permanent. I always wanted a neighborhood for you guys."

"I know, but I thought we'd be here longer than six months," Hunter sighed.

"Hunter, we're going to do everything we can to assure this is the last move we make for a long time," Alexis told him.

"Okay," Hunter nodded.

"It's getting late," Kevin noted.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "Sarah Grace, do you mind sharing a room with Maggie for the night?"

"Okay," Sarah Grace nodded, "I guess it okay."

"She doesn't snore, I promise," Alexis teased.

"May we be excused?" Hunter asked his mother.

"Yes, you may be excused to go upstairs and get ready for bed."

Hunter, Cade and Sarah Grace left the room. Maggie hung back with a curious twinkle in her eyes.

"What's up, Mags?" Alexis tugged on a lock of her hair.

"Can I have a swing at the new house?" she asked.

"We'll see what we can do," Kevin nodded.

"Thank you, Defective Wyan," Maggie stated before darting from the room with a high pitched giggle.

"I think she has a crush on you," Alexis smirked.

"I think she likes to tease me," Kevin laughed.

"You okay with staying over? I didn't overstep, did I?"

"I would have suggested it if you hadn't brought it up," Kevin stated, "Like I said, it's getting late."

"How about we tuck in the kids and then go to bed?" Alexis looped her arms around his neck.

"Sounds like a plan," he smiled at her. "Come on."

-d-d-d-d-

"Dad, can I talk to you for a second?" Alexis asked after they'd finished dinner and Kate had taken the kids into the study for a movie.

"Sure, Sweetheart, what's up?" Richard handed her a few dishes to load into the dishwasher.

"You know Kevin and I are planning a future together, right?"

"Yes, you have made mention of it," he nodded.

"We want to move in together."

"Are you looking for my permission?" Rick asked, "What you and Kevin decide is between the two of you. It's going to be a bit cramped in your apartment though."

"That's the other thing," Alexis said. "We're looking for a place in Brooklyn."

"Brooklyn," Castle coughed out, nearly dropping a dish in surprise.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "Dad, I always wanted a house and a neighborhood like I had in New Orleans."

"Yes, I remember, but I thought we had settled all that when I bought your apartment," Richard replied.

"Dad, I took it because it was a gift, and we were going to kill each other if I stayed here longer."

"So the apartment was just a pit stop," Rick replied.

"Dad, you have to have known Kevin and I would be looking for a bigger place," Alexis replied, "We have four kids, none of which are familiar with having to share rooms."

Rick frowned as he thought it over and realized his daughter was right.

"You know, you and Kate could take this as an opportunity."

"Opportunity for what?" he asked.

"To get a bigger place," Alexis said. "Maybe let the boys have their own rooms."

"What's wrong with the loft?" he glanced around, "It worked just fine to raise you."

"I was an only child," Alexis pointed out. "Come on, haven't you ever wanted a yard?"

"We have one in the Hamptons," he pointed out.

"Dad, kids need to be able to run around and wear themselves out. They can't do that in an apartment," Alexis stated.

"You seemed to-"

"Again, I was an only child," Alexis pointed out. "Then there's the other thing."

"What other thing?" he asked.

"Kevin and I both have unpredictable schedules," Alexis said. "If we both get called out at night, we need someone to be there for the kids."

"Alexis, are you guilting me into moving to Brooklyn?" he hooted with laughter.

"Yes," Alexis nodded.

"I'll think on it," he narrowed his eyes.

"I think Kate would be on board."

"Alexis," Rick sighed.

"Just think of how much fun you'll have finding two houses next to each other and building a tunnel to connect them."

"Why would I…?" he looked to her in confusion.

"So in the winter, we don't have to get all bundled up to go next door."

"That's actually not a bad idea," he began to come around to her way of thinking.

Alexis smiled, "So, you'll consider it?"

"I said I'll think about it."

"I know," Alexis smiled. "I'm just making sure you'll really think on it and not just say you will while you come up with an alternate plan like buying a building for us."

"If I had the money, I'd certainly consider it."

"Consider a house instead, okay?"

"Okay," Rick smiled. "I'm gonna see what the kids want for dessert."

"Chocolate is usually a popular choice," Alexis replied.

"I'll remember that," Rick nodded and headed for the study.

Alexis found her cell phone and dialed Kevin's extension at the twelfth.

" _Ryan."_

"Hey, Handsome."

" _Hey, Babe, how's dinner at your dad's?"_ he asked.

"Not bad," Alexis smiled. "I think I managed to get him to consider a move."

" _Wow, Castle considering leaving Manhattan,"_ Kevin responded, _"I think pigs are growing wings as we speak."_

Alexis smiled, "How are you? Burning the midnight oil?"

" _Something like that,"_ Kevin stated, _"Tracking down leads, arresting the bad guy, trying to get the bad guy to confess."_

"I'm surprised Kate's not there," Alexis looked towards her stepmother.

" _Boss lady gets to do as she wishes,"_ Kevin responded.

"Are you hungry? We have leftovers."

" _Starving actually,"_ he confessed, _"Javi and I worked through dinner."_

"I'll bring you guys something in a bit," Alexis smiled. "Love you."

" _Love you more."_

"See you soon," Alexis said before she hung up.

"Hey Bud, you want dessert?" Kate asked.

"Save me some," Alexis said. "I'm gonna take some leftovers to Kevin and Javi."

"They haven't eaten yet?" Kate asked while Alexis began packing up some of their meal to take out.

"Worked through dinner," Alexis said.

"What for? Did they catch a case?" she asked.

"It sounded like they did."

"They were supposed to call if they did," Kate pulled out her phone to see if she'd missed a call. She hadn't.

"I think they were letting you relax. You've been going full tilt for a while."

"So were they," Kate huffed, "Give that boyfriend of yours a head smack from me."

"Sorry. I don't believe in violence."

"At least withhold dessert," Kate replied.

"Okay, that I can do," Alexis handed over the cake.

"Thank you," Kate accepted the treat, "We'll keep the kiddos occupied while you're gone."

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "By the way, I mentioned Brooklyn to Dad."

"And?"

"He's considering it."

"You are a miracle worker," Kate laughed.

"I took Javi's advice and brought up the tunnel idea."

"I'll have to keep that trick in mind."

"Good. I'll be back," Alexis headed out the door.

-d-d-d-

"Dinner," the red head called when she stepped off the elevator.

"Thank god," Kevin greeted her with a kiss, "Javi was about ready to chew my arm off."

"There will be no biting of Kevin unless it's by me," Alexis told her boyfriend's partner.

"Whoa, way too much information about your bedroom activities," Javi snatched the bag of foods she'd brought with her.

"Consider it payback from walking in on you and Lanie last month," Alexis shuddered.

Javi rolled his eyes and disappeared into the break room to heat their dinner.

Alexis perched herself on Kevin's desk, and he stepped between her legs.

"Hey," she whispered.

"Hey, yourself," he nipped at her lips.

"I missed you at dinner tonight," she said.

"I missed you, too," he replied.

"Kate's mad you didn't call when you caught a case," Alexis told him, "She withheld dessert."

"I can do without dessert," Kevin said. "She deserved the time. She pushes herself too hard."

"She reminded me you have been working pretty hard yourself."

"We're tougher than we look," Kevin assured her.

"Yeah, but even the toughest of guys need sleep sometimes," Alexis smiled. "How about after dinner, you and Javi pack it in for the night?"

"I don't know. We've got bad guys to catch," Kevin smiled.

"I'll make it worth your while," Alexis whispered in his ear.

"How?"

"I'll be a bad girl for the night."

Kevin nearly fell out of his chair in reply.

Alexis giggled.

"What are you two doing out here?" Javier came back in and handed a plate to Kevin.

"I'm trying to convince the good detective to pack it in for the night," Alexis replied, "What about you, Espo? Don't you have a lady of your own to entertain?"

"Maybe," Javier shrugged.

Alexis eyed him, "The only time you're evasive is when you are serious about someone and I know that it's not Lanie."

"How do you know it's not her, Babe?" Kevin chimed in, "They were looking mighty cozy not too long ago."

"Because she is at a spa this weekend in Montauk."

"Didn't you ask for this weekend off, Partner?" Kevin spun his chair towards Javier.

"No," Javier shook his head.

"So, who's the new lady," Alexis prodded, "Anyone I know?"

"No," Javier avoided eye contact.

"You're lying," Kevin said.

"Oh, if you're sleeping with Kate, I'm going to kill you."

"Not even in my wildest dreams," Javi snorted.

"So, spill," Alexis nudged him with her foot

"Why so curious?" Javi asked, "Has Ryan lost his spark?"

"I just want to know why you're hiding this new relationship," Alexis replied, "It's not like you and Lanie have anything exclusive."

"No, we don't, and lately we haven't had anything at all."

Alexis narrowed her eyes at him and laughed, "Oh my God. You're sleeping with Tori."

"I am not," Javi sputtered.

"So what if you are, Espo," Alexis chimed in, "You're both single adults, and she's pretty, smart and nice."

"She's also not his usual type," Kevin chimed in

"I thought his type included two requirements, not married and breathing," Alexis teased.

"You're hilarious, Castle, Jr.," Javier frowned.

"Well, I hope things work out," Alexis replied, "Oh, before I forget. Kevin, I have something for you."

"Not in front of Javi, Lex," Kevin teased.

"Boy, mind in the gutter much," she searched through her bag until she pulled out the newspaper with several real estate listings, a few circled with red ink.

"Anything promising?" Kevin looked over the papers.

"A few," she nodded. "Any chance I can get you to come home with me?"

"We should make a few calls about our case," Kevin shook his head.

"Go, Ryan, I got you covered," Javi chimed in, "I'll make the calls and then head home myself."

"Tell Tori we said hi," Alexis grinned.

"I trust you'll keep this info to yourselves," Javi glanced mostly at Alexis.

"I can keep my mouth shut."

"Thanks," Javi stated, "And thanks for the grub."

"No problem," Alexis said as her phone rang. "It's my dad. Dad?"

Alexis had a quick conversation with her father and then turned her attention back to Kevin, "Come on, Babe, take me home. We're getting the place to ourselves tonight. Kiddos fell asleep after dessert. Kate must have slipped a sedative into the cake."

"Sounds good to me," Kevin smiled as he hooked his arm around Alexis and waved to Javi, "Night Bro."

Javi nodded, having just taken a bite of his dinner.

-d-d-d-d-

Hello, hello. Hope everyone's still enjoying this. We do have one more story to tell before we end, so stick with us. Please reply.


	58. Chapter 41

"Hello?"

 _"Alexis? It's Kate. Where are you?"_

"I'm just leaving the morgue," Alexis said as she pressed the elevator button. "Why?"

 _"You need to get Kevin out of the office,"_ Kate replied, _"We're working a case, and he's refusing to leave even though Gates has ordered us all to take the night off as we're running on fumes. He's taking the little boy's death especially hard."_

"Yeah, I know. Your dad called me. Kevin called and pretty much ordered Jim to get Hunter, Cade, and Maggie from camp and keep them home," Alexis looked at the newspaper in her hand. "How are you?"

 _"Hanging in there,"_ Kate replied, _"We're all tired. Kevin and Javi nearly came to blows. We aren't making any progress. We need a good night's sleep, or as close to it as we can get."_

"Go home. Kiss my siblings. Crawl in bed with my dad," Alexis advised. "I'll get Kevin."

 _"And make sure he sleeps,"_ Kate added.

"I will," Alexis nodded. "If I have to knock him out with a wine bottle, he'll sleep."

 _"Whatever it takes,"_ Kate replied, _"Just make sure he's conscious tomorrow. We're going to need all hands on deck."_

"I will. You're not driving are you?"

 _"No, your dad sent a car,"_ Kate smiled. _"It just got here. I'll see you later, Alexis."_

"Take care of yourself, Kate," Alexis replied.

 _"Thanks. Bye."_

"Bye," Alexis hung up her phone.

-d-d-d-

The homicide floor was eerily quiet and almost completely dark when Alexis stepped out of the elevator.

Kevin was alone in the bullpen, flipping through files as he tried desperately to find a clue, which would lead to the sociopath who killed the young boy on the playground.

Alexis slipped off her heels and silently approached Kevin. She didn't want to startle him, so first she put her hands on his shoulders before leaning down, sliding her arms around his neck in a loose hold.

"Lex, what are you doing here?" he relaxed into her embrace for a moment.

"I came to get you," she whispered before kissing his temple. "Come home with me for a while. I know Gates told you guys to get some rest."

"I can't do it, Lex," he shook off her suggestion, "We're so close, I can feel it."

"You're close to exhaustion," she kissed his cheek, "You aren't going to do anyone any good if you're in the hospital."

"Is that your professional opinion, Dr. LaSalle?"

"No, it's the opinion of the woman who loves you," Alexis smiled. "Come home with me for a little while. We'll get into bed and sleep."

"I'm not going to be able to sleep even if I go home," he replied, "I can't get that image of the boy out of my mind."

Alexis moved so she was in front of him, "I know. I get it. I've got images in my head I can't get rid of either. Being at home with people who love you helps."

"Couldn't hurt to try," he gave a resigned sigh, "I can't see straight anyways."

"Keys," she motioned him to hand over his keys. There was no way she was going to let him drive.

"Keys," Kevin nodded and gave her the keys as he stood. "You're beautiful, you know that?"

"I spent all day with three dead hookers," Alexis smirked. "Thanks for trying."

"Bet they were a fun trio when they were alive," he tried to make light of the situation, but it fell flat to them both.

"Come on, Detective. Let's get you home. You're bordering on delirious."

Kevin put his arm around Alexis and kissed the top of her head as they walked, "Thank you."

"Anytime."

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis lay on her side across the bed while Kevin lay in the center as she ran her fingers across his face lightly.

"Are you trying to put me to sleep or keep me awake?" he spoke into the darkness.

"Sleep," she pulled her fingers away. "Sorry."

"Don't be," he caught her hand and brought it to his lips, "It's a distraction from the thoughts in my head."

"Are you hungry? I know you guys forget to eat on cases like these."

"I couldn't eat even if I was," he shook off the suggestion.

"I know it's hard when it's a young child," she began, "You have to take emotions out of it."

"He was seven," Kevin said. "He had dark hair like Cade and freckles like Hunter."

"I heard," she stroked his hair, "Focusing on those details is not going to help you find the killer."

"I know," Kevin said. "Cases like these and I just want to…"

"Lock the kids up and home school them," Alexis ventured.

"To start," he nodded.

Alexis let herself fall flat on the bed and reached out to hold Kevin's hand, "We had a case a couple of years ago back in New Orleans. There was this cult leader who was also a pedophile. He was sleeping with one of his fourteen year old 'followers' to get her pregnant so he could get his hands on her trust fund."

"What happened?" Kevin shifted to lay beside her.

"When the police closed in, he poisoned all the members, including thirteen children under ten. I couldn't sleep for weeks after walking into that scene."

"It's a wonder you were able to sleep ever again," he ran his fingers through her hair.

"There's a lot of scary things out in the world, but Chris told me something which helped. No matter the craziness out there, there are always those sworn to bring those crazies to justice, and they will not stop until justice is served," Alexis replied.

"Smart guy," Kevin remarked.

"He had his moments," Alexis smiled. "So do you."

"I don't know how to catch this guy," Kevin was near tears.

"You'll figure it out," she replied, "I have faith you will."

"Why?"

"Because you do not know how to fail or give up," Alexis smiled.

"I love you," he leaned in and kissed her.

"I love you, too," Alexis smiled before she patted the space next to her, "Now come here and lay back down."

"I'm going to check on everyone first," Kevin bent in and kissed her a second time, "Make sure the apartment is locked up. I'll be back."

"Okay," Alexis smiled. "Go."

Kevin made his way to the front door and checked the locks before going upstairs. Cade's room was first. He smiled when he noticed the comic book lying next to the young boy's head. He took it gently and put it on the nightstand before skimming a hand over his head and pulling the blanket up to cover him more.

Maggie was next. She was curled up with her favorite teddy bear and a serene smile on her face. She looked just like her mother as she slept.

Last was Hunter.

Kevin entered his son's room slowly. Bonding with his son was harder than he'd thought it would be. They were making progress, and Hunter was slowly coming to accept him being around. Looking at him right now, all Kevin could think about were all the things which could've happened to prevent them from ever meeting.

"Hey," Alexis found him in Hunter's room. She put her arms around his waist from behind, "You okay?"

"Yeah," Kevin covered her hands with his. "Just thinking."

"Thinking is trouble right now," she walked around Kevin and straightened Hunter's blanket a little before turning back to Kevin.

"Yeah, I know," Kevin nodded.

"They're all safe in their beds. Why don't you call your mom and check on Sarah Grace again? Then come to bed," she said pulling him from Hunter's room.

Kevin nodded and searched out his phone.

" _Hello?"_

"Hey, Mom," Kevin smiled. "Did I wake you?"

Bridget searched out a clock to orientate herself, _"Yeah, it's nearly midnight. Are you staying at the office again?"_

"Lex made me go back to her place to sleep. I was just calling to check on Sarah Grace."

" _Again?"_

"It's just this case," Kevin ran his hand along the back of his neck, "It hits a little too close to home."

" _I know, Sweetheart. You sound exhausted."_

"Yeah," he confirmed, "Can't sleep. Can't turn my brain off."

" _Try,"_ Bridget advised. _"Let that girl you love help you."_

"I'm trying," Kevin replied, "It's a bit foreign…you know Jenny was never all that understanding. She was always trying to get me to find a desk job."

" _I know, but Alexis is different,"_ Bridget reminded him. _"Now go. I'll have Sarah Grace call you when she wakes up."_

"Thanks, Mom," he replied.

" _You're welcome. Goodnight,"_ Bridget smiled. _"I love you."_

"I love you, too."

Kevin hung the phone up as he walked towards Alexis's bedroom. He was ready to climb into bed and put his arms around her.

Alexis appeared to have put the time he was on the phone to good use as she'd changed into a sultry nightgown.

"This is not how you left me moments ago. You were wearing a New Orleans Saints T-shirt which has seen better days," Kevin smiled.

"Felt like I needed something a bit less comfortable," she beckoned him closer. "Think you're up for this, Detective?"

"Up is the word I would use," Kevin smiled as he put his hands on her hips and slid them down and then under the hem.

"Good," her hands went to his chest, rubbing lightly, "It's been a week since we had any time alone together. I've missed you."

"I missed you, too," Kevin smiled. "Shall I show you how much?"

"Yes please," Alexis smiled.

Kevin dove in for a scorching kiss while peeling the nightgown from her body and tossing it aside. "The nightgown was beautiful, but so unnecessary. All I need is this body to get me going."

"I'll remember that," Alexis giggled.

"Good," he replied as he ran his hands along her body, memorizing every slope and curve as he went. "I love you."

"I love you," Alexis put her hands on his shoulders and pulled him to her.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

Kevin's eyes opened to greet the dark room. He felt Alexis next to him and turned his head to gently kiss her shoulder before he slipped from their bed.

He couldn't shake the nightmare which he'd awoken from. He didn't want to wake her, so he decided to make his way to the living room to see if there was anything decent on the television at this late hour.

He slipped into some jeans and ran his hand through his hair. Before he sat down he decided to take one more look at the kids, to make sure they were safe and sound.

Hunter and Cade were both sound asleep just as they'd been when he checked on them earlier.

Maggie, on the other hand, was tossing and turning, a frown on her little face. In her movements, she'd knocked her bear to the floor.

Kevin bent down to retrieve her bear just as Maggie bolted upright.

"Maggie?" Kevin said quietly. "Hey, you okay?"

Maggie shook her head vigorously from side to side. She was breathing heavy. "There are monsters under my bed. They took my teddy bear," she wiped at the tears in her eyes.

"I was able to rescue your bear from them," Kevin quickly handed it to her.

She hugged it tight and looked up at him, "They're still there."

"Do you want me to chase them away?" Kevin offered.

"Can you?" she asked.

"Yep, I chase them away all the time for Sarah Grace," he nodded.

"Thank you," she smiled hopefully.

Kevin knelt under the bed and gave a growl loud enough for Maggie to be convinced he'd done his duty, "All gone now. They won't be coming back if they know what's good for them."

"Thank you, Kevin," her smile widened.

"How about you lay down and try to go back to sleep?" he suggested.

"Will you stay until I do?" Maggie laid back down, "In case they come back."

"You bet," Kevin knelt down.

Maggie nodded and curled back up under the covers, her bear securely in her arms. Kevin lightly kissed the top of her head and left after her breathing had evened out. He closed the door behind him and turned to see Alexis waiting for him.

"Monsters under her bed again?" Alexis inquired, "Chris was always chasing them away for her. I was never scary enough. She'd have to sleep with me the nights Chris was working late and the monsters made a cameo in her dreams."

"It's been a long time since I've had to chase monsters away. I'm glad I still have what it takes."

"I heard her call you Kevin," Alexis smiled while her arms came around his shoulders.

"Yeah," Kevin smiled. "I think I'll miss Defective Wyan though."

"I'm sure she'll call you that every once in a while."

"Yeah, hopefully," he chuckled.

"Why are you awake?" she asked.

"Funky dream," he admitted. "I didn't want to wake you."

"Bad form, Detective," Alexis scolded him, "You should have waken me so I could chase the monsters away for you."

"How would you plan to do that, Dr. LaSalle?"

Alexis leaned forward and whispered in his ear.

"Yep, that should do it," he's voice rose an octave.

Alexis led him back downstairs to their room.

Alexis made good on her promise, effectively chasing away the monsters until Kevin's alarm went off in the morning.

-d-d-d-d-

Thanks for all the replies last time. Stick with us. :)


	59. Chapter 42

Alexis looked up from her book when the door to the apartment opened. She smiled at Sarah Grace and Kevin, "Hey."

"Hey," Kevin responded before watching Sarah Grace disappeared without a word.

"The visit went that well, huh?" Alexis greeted Kevin with a kiss to his cheek.

"Sarah Grace hasn't spoken to me since we left the prison," Kevin admitted.

Alexis put her book aside and sat up further to put her arms around Kevin, "I'm sorry. Neither of you deserve this."

"I tried everything I could think of to get Sarah Grace to talk to me on the drive back," Kevin replied, "I don't know if she's upset with me because of something her mother said about me, or if she's blaming me for what happened...I don't know what to do."

"Why don't I try talking to her? I do have a little experience with a difficult mom."

"I can't ask you to solve my problems."

"You're not, and it's not just your problem, Kevin."

"She's my daughter," Kevin replied, "I should be the one to fix this."

"When Maggie had a bad dream last week, you helped me out. We're a team."

"That's different," he shook his head.

"I love you, Kevin, but sometimes it's just easier for girls to talk to other girls," Alexis gave him a reassuring smile, "It doesn't make you any less of a father."

"I've always heard boys need their father," Kevin said. "I never thought about girls needing their moms."

"I'll never try to replace Jenny, but I think Sarah Grace needs to know I can be her friend."

"It's worth a shot," he smiled slightly.

Alexis reached out and turned Kevin's face to hers, "She loves you, Kevin. That's not changing."

"Yeah," his head bobbed reluctantly.

"I'll take Sarah Grace for ice cream. Why don't you do something fun with the rest of the kids," Alexis suggested.

"I can do that," Kevin nodded. "Thanks, Lex."

"You can return the favor tonight," she whispered.

"Deal," he smiled.

Alexis went upstairs and knocked on the door to Maggie and Sarah Grace's room, "Sarah Grace?"

There was no answer. Alexis waited a few moments before opening the door. "Hey, Bud, how about some ice cream? My treat."

Sarah Grace was holding her teddy bear to her chest and staring at her legs. She looked up when Alexis sat down on the bed with her.

"You okay?" Alexis touched Sarah Grace's knee softly, "It must have been hard seeing your mom in that place."

"She was really unhappy," Sarah Grace said softly.

"I'm sure she was," Alexis nodded. "Sweetie, you know none of this is your fault, right?"

"I know," she nodded slightly.

"It's not your father's fault either," Alexis added, "He's worried about you, worried you blame him for what happened with your mother."

"I don't blame Daddy," Sarah Grace shook her head, "Or you."

"That's nice to hear," Alexis replied. "Do you want to talk about what you're feeling?"

"Can we get ice cream, too?"

"Yes, c'mon," Alexis smiled.

"Okay," Sarah Grace placed her teddy bear on her pillows and followed Alexis.

-d-d-d-d-

"Here you go," Alexis put the banana split in front of Sarah Grace. "Your father just might kill me."

"Why?" Sarah Grace was suddenly horrified by the statement.

"Oh no, Honey," Alexis shook her head when she realized her mistake. "I didn't mean literally."

"Oh," Sarah Grace released a sigh of relief.

"I just meant he's not going to be happy with the sugar rush we're going to be on when we get back to the apartment."

"Sugar rushes are fun," Sarah Grace smiled.

"Yes, they are," Alexis laughed, "When I was your age, my dad would take me out for ice cream all the time when I was upset. Then we'd play laser tag at home until the sugar rush wore off."

"Your dad's fun," Sarah Grace said.

"Yes, he is. I should get some of his laser tag stuff for our house."

"Have you and Dad found us a place yet?" Sarah Grace asked.

"Still looking," Alexis nodded. "We want something near your grandma."

"Yeah, that would be nice," Sarah Grace replied, "Then I could go to my same school."

"Absolutely," Alexis smiled. She waited for Sarah Grace to eat several spoonfuls of ice cream, "Do you want to talk about your mom?"

"I don't get why she did what she did," Sarah Grace frowned, "I asked her today, and she just said I wouldn't understand."

"She's very hurt and mad, Sarah Grace."

"What she did was so wrong," Sarah Grace moaned, "She had to know it was."

"Sometimes anger and hurt can take over our good sense," Alexis said gently.

"It doesn't make it okay," Sarah Grace replied.

"No, it doesn't," Alexis agreed, "Your mom made a mistake, and she's paying for it."

"She's gonna be there a long time," Sarah Grace said quietly.

"She is," Alexis nodded. "You can still see and write her."

"I don't like that place," Sarah Grace stated, "It's cold and dark and creepy."

"I know," Alexis replied, "I still think you should try to go every once in awhile…for your mom. It will give her something to look forward to."

Sarah Grace nodded, "I know. I like the idea of writing to her."

"I bet she'll like that, too."

"I'm going to have questions," Sarah Grace stated, "...about growing up. She won't be around for me to ask."

"You can always ask me," Alexis said after a moment. "I don't want to take your mom's place, Sweetie, but I would like to be your friend."

"Really?" Sarah Grace looked at her with hopeful eyes.

"Yes, really," Alexis nodded. "Also, you can talk to your dad. He loves you like crazy."

"Yeah, I know," she smiled.

"We'd better eat this ice cream before it melts," Alexis prodded her, "Eat up, Bud."

Sarah Grace smiled as she dug into her ice cream.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis pulled her hair back as she walked out of the bathroom into her room. Kevin was in bed already.

"What did you do to the kids?" Alexis pulled back the bedcovers, "Cade was nearly bouncing off the walls when I went to check on him."

"And Sarah Grace was any better?" Kevin asked with a smile.

"I have a good reason," Alexis replied, "I was cheering up a young girl who is missing her mother."

"What did she tell you?"

"Sorry, Kev," Alexis gave him a slight smile, "That's between me and Sarah Grace. She needs someone she can confide in from time to time. I need to earn her trust."

"Good answer," Kevin smiled. "Thank you for being willing to be good to my daughter."

"I've been in Sarah Grace's place…sort of," Alexis reminded him, "My mom wasn't around much, and Dad brought a new woman into my life. Gina didn't really try with me; Kate did. It didn't take my psych classes to figure out one of the reasons Dad and Gina didn't work out was because Gina wasn't interested in being a mom. I don't want that for me and Sarah Grace."

"God, I love you," Kevin smiled.

"Good," Alexis smiled. "So, what did you do with the rest of the kids?"

"We started out at the batting cages," Kevin replied, "On the way back to the apartment, there was a vendor selling cotton candy. Maggie is entirely too convincing for her own good. Three bags of sugar later, I can understand why Cade is bouncing off the walls."

"You should have seen her after the first Mardi Gras she could talk. Chris bought her everything she asked for," Alexis snuggled under the covers. "She was up half the night."

"I hope you made Chris stay up with her as punishment," he laughed.

"He did," she laughed along, "It wasn't punishment for Chris though. He loved any time he could spend with her."

"Liked having a little girl," Kevin nodded.

"He loved going fishing and rough housing with the boys, but when Maggie came along it was magic," Alexis shook her head, "Love at first sight."

"I know that feeling," Kevin smiled.

"Sarah Grace is her daddy's girl."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Neither would she," Alexis lay on her side and put her hand over his heart.

"The realtor left a message on the apartment phone," Kevin tapped at her hand, "She has a few more houses in Brooklyn to show us."

"Good," Alexis smiled. "Dad said he's looking too."

"Yes, but is he looking in the right borough?" Kevin asked.

"I told him Brooklyn. Kate's keeping him on track."

"I'll believe that when I see it," he snorted, "Do you know how many times Kate ordered him to stay in the car back when he first started consulting with the department? Do you know how many times he actually listened?"

"I'll take him the listings," Alexis nodded. "How was your day, Dear?"

"I've had better," he sighed heavily, "Driving my daughter to prison to see her mother isn't exactly my idea of an enjoyable day off."

"I'm sorry, Baby," Alexis whispered. "I know this sucks all the way around."

"Yeah," he nodded, "It's not how I ever saw the divorce going."

"Did you see Jenny?" Alexis asked.

"For a bit before Sarah Grace sat down with her."

"This is the first time you've seen her since you went to the Dominican. How did that go?"

"She got the papers," Kevin admitted.

"Ouch," Alexis winced.

"I didn't expect her to be happy about this," Kevin replied.

"Who would be?" Alexis pointed out.

"She's mad I divorced her without any lawyers," Kevin admitted.

"Did she really expect you to just keep playing her games?" Alexis replied.

"I don't know," Kevin shook his head and tipped it back to look at the ceiling. "Your ceiling is red."

"Wow, subject change," Alexis challenged him, "It's always been red."

"I never noticed," he shrugged.

"Because you're always on top," she teased.

"I'm open to trading places tonight," he chuckled.

"You sure you're up for it? You seem tired," Alexis said.

"I'm sure I'll find my second wind," he winked at her.

"In that case," Alexis straddled his waist and leaned down, her ponytail tickling his chest.

-d-d-d-d-

Some bonding but sorry no bondage ;). Tell us something good.


	60. Chapter 43

Sorry this took so long. Real life got in the way.

-d-d-d-d-

Kevin leaned back against Javi's desk and smiled, "Hey, Bro."

Javi looked up from his paperwork to his partner, "You want something."

"Yeah, how are you and Lanie these days?" Kevin asked.

"Fine," Javi looked at his suspiciously.

"How about a weekend in the Hamptons with me, Lex and our gaggle of children?"

"Sounds like fun," Javi nodded. "Beckett and Castle too?"

"No, they're busy this weekend."

"Too bad," Javi frowned, "I'll run it by Lanie, but I'm game."

"Good," Kevin smiled. "Barring a murder, we leave at six on Friday."

"I'll be packed and ready to go. Are we taking the Jitney?"

"Nah," Kevin shook his head. "We're driving."

"Nothing like a couple of hours in traffic with impatient children," Javi laughed, "Should be fun."

"They'll have music and books to keep them entertained.

"Any particular reason for the Hamptons weekend?" Espo raised a curious brow, "You and Lex have been enjoying some smooth sailing as of late."

"It's the first place we spent a weekend alone."

"So you want to bring me, Lanie, and four children to recreate that magical moment?" Javi snorted, "I'm touched."

"It was Alexis's idea to invite you guys."

"You want babysitters so you and Alexis can have some 'alone' time. I dig it."

"Good," Kevin smiled. "Thanks, Javi."

"You're welcome, Bro."

"I'm gonna call Lex and let her know we're on. Call Lanie and start explaining."

"Consider it done."

Kevin dialed Alexis.

 _"Hello?"_

"Hello, Gorgeous."

 _"Hey, Detective,"_ Kevin could hear the smile in her voice, _"How's my favorite homicide detective?"_

"I'm great," Kevin smiled. "How's my favorite M.E.?"

 _"It's a relatively slow day so I can't complain,"_ she replied, _"Did you talk to Espo yet?"_

"He's all set. He's calling Lanie right now."

 _"Good,"_ Alexis smiled. _"Do you know what I found this morning? A picture of you and me from the first time we went to the Hamptons for a weekend."_

"Really, when was it taken?" he searched his memory to recall when a camera came out.

 _"When you were sleeping,_ " Alexis felt herself blush even though he wasn't there to see.

"How about we resolve to take a couple snaps of us while awake," he suggested.

 _"Sounds good,"_ Alexis smiled. _"See you after work."_

"Can't come soon enough," he replied.

 _"Bye,"_ Alexis said.

"Dude, you are so gone on her," Espo felt the need to irk his partner.

"Yeah, I am," Kevin smiled.

"That's all you're going to say?"

"No sense in denying it," Kevin chuckled.

"It's good to see you happy."

=d=d=d=d=d=

Kevin opened his bag and reached all the way down until he found the small box he was looking for. Pulling it out, he opened it and smiled.

"Yo, girls say dinner's ready," Javier said from the doorway.

"Oh, okay," Kevin spun around quickly with the box behind his back.

Javier eyed him suspiciously and then smiled, "Lanie and I will clean up after dinner."

"Yeah, thanks," Kevin nodded.

"Who do you think you're fooling with that old hide the ring behind your back routine?" Javi chuckled.

"Shut up," Kevin hissed. "I'd like to ask her before she hears about it."

"Do you really think I'd spoil the surprise?" Javi snorted.

"Johanna Martha Castle," Kevin said evenly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Javi looked towards his partner in complete confusion.

"Beckett told you about her being pregnant with Jo, and in ten minutes half the precinct knew. Beckett had to tell Castle she was pregnant at a crime scene."

"Old news," Javi waved off the concern, "I've evolved."

"Sure you have," Kevin smiled.

"Hey, Kev? Congratulations," Javier smiled as they walked downstairs.

"Lex hasn't said yes," Kevin gave a nervous laugh.

"She will," Javier smiled when they entered the kitchen where Lanie was putting the finishing touches on the meal. "Hey, something smells amazing in here."

"That's me, right?" Lanie wrapped her arms around Javi's waist.

"Always," Javier smiled at her.

"Where's Lex?"

"Here," Alexis entered the room. "Boys are still cleaning up outside. Someone had the bright idea to start a mud fight."

"Hunter or Cade?" Kevin asked.

"I don't know, but I know who gave them the idea," Alexis turned to look at Javier.

"I just mentioned it was fun," Javier responded innocently, "I never told them to start one."

"Hunter is eight, and Cade is six. For some reason they think you are the best thing since sliced bread," Alexis folded her arms. "So, please, for my sanity, be careful what you mention to them."

"It's what uncles are supposed to do," Javi shrugged.

"Kevin, help," Alexis turned to her boyfriend.

"What do you want me to do?" Kevin asked, "He can take me."

"Well, if you ever want to take me again, talk some sense into him," Alexis smiled. "Lanie, where are the girls?"

"Upstairs," Lanie fought a giggle at Kevin's expression.

"Kevin, go get them. It's time to eat," Alexis asked him.

"You got it," Kevin kissed the back of her head and headed upstairs.

"I'll set the table," Javier took the dishes.

"How about that, doing something without being asked?" Lanie smirked, "Who said old dogs can't learn new tricks."

"Hey, who you calling old?" Javier asked.

Alexis giggled while finishing the salad to put on the table.

When everyone assembled at the table, dinner commenced and happy conversations carried them through.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis stopped walking and looked out at the ocean. She smiled when Kevin's arms slid around her waist.

"Where's your mind?"

"Nowhere special," she whispered.

"Feels like anything is possible for us now, doesn't it," he nipped at her neck.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded with a smile. "Is it crazy to miss a body of water? I had the gulf, but I really missed the ocean."

"Think Castle would let us just move in permanently?" Kevin glanced towards the Castle property, "Plenty of rooms for the kids."

"Commute would be a big pain though," Alexis smiled.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "Your dad and Kate had the right idea though."

"What do you mean?"

"It's a good place for a wedding," Kevin swallowed hard.

"Kevin," she began but choked up.

"Turn around and look at me," he said quietly.

Alexis turned slowly to see Kevin down on one knee.

"Alexis Kathleen Castle LaSalle, I love you more than I thought I could love anyone," he felt himself choking up, "The biggest regret of my life is letting you leave without following. I've been given a second chance, and I'm not going to waste one more second. Will you marry me?"

"Yes. Yes, you know I'll marry you," Alexis smiled.

"Yes?" Kevin double checked.

"You bet your ass I'll marry you," Alexis fell to her knees and looped her arms around his neck. "I love you, Kevin Anthony Ryan."

Kevin gave her a grin which melted her insides while sliding on the ring.

"It's beautiful," Alexis bit her lip before she kissed him.

"I hope you know you've made me the happiest man," he was still grinning from ear to ear while holding her close.

"I'm about to make you happier," Alexis smirked while putting her hands on his shoulders and kissed him while knocking him onto his back.

"Not possible," he laughed.

Alexis looked around them, "We're alone. I think it's time I knocked Gram's studio to the second most public place I've ever had sex."

"We're about to get sand in some very strange places," he laughed.

"It's going to be worth it."

"I have no doubt," Kevin smiled at her.

=d=d=d=d=

"Hello?" Alexis called when she opened the door to her father's loft.

"Hey, what are you guys doing here?" Kate greeted Alexis and Kevin as their kids came bursting in.

"I want to see Grandpy," Maggie ran towards her grandfather who has his arms outstretched for her.

"I love these hugs," Rick smiled.

"We had more reasons than just Maggie's need to show her grandfather affection," Alexis watched her father and daughter.

"Everything okay?" Kate asked.

"You wanna?" Alexis said to Kevin with a nod to Kate and Rick.

"It's all you, Babe," Kevin shook his head.

Rick caught the exchange between the pair and knew what they were about to announce before the words came out of his daughter's mouth.

"We're engaged," Alexis produced her left hand to show off her ring.

"Ah!" Kate shrieked and immediately gave Alexis a hug.

"Congratulations, Ryan," Rick extended his hand to Kevin.

"Thank you," Kevin smiled. "You're really okay with this?"

"You divorced?"

"Oh, yes," Kevin nodded.

"Then I'm okay."

"You're awfully calm about this," Alexis teased her dad, "Did you have some inside information, Dad?"

"Kevin's old fashioned. He asked permission before he asked the question."

"Did you really?" Alexis beamed at her fiancé.

"We talked it all through," Kevin nodded, "He took it pretty well. There were only a couple of threats on my life."

Alexis rolled her eyes, "You're very brave to get involved with this family."

"I've been involved with this family for over a decade."

"It's a whole new level when you're on the inside, Ryan, trust me," Kate laughed while hugging her long time partner.

"He went inside over eight years ago," Alexis smiled at Kevin and then looked to where Hunter and Cade had started up a card game with Ian and Jamie.

Sarah Grace, Maggie, and Jo began chatting eagerly about the prospect of getting new dresses for the pending nuptials.

Alexis smiled as she looked around and then her smile faded as she spotted a picture on the piano. Kevin followed her gaze and spotted what she was looking at.

"Hey Dad, would you put the picture of me and Chris away?"

"He'd be happy for you," Castle assured her.

"I know, but," Alexis's eyes bounced off Kevin and then back towards her father.

"Lex," Kevin shook his head, "It's okay."

"You sure?" Alexis asked.

"He's always going to be a part of you," Kevin pecked at her cheek, "I've made my peace with that."

"I love you, Kevin," Alexis smiled.

"I love you, too," he returned her smile.

"How about a celebratory dinner?" Rick suggested.

"Oh, we have to call your mom," Alexis realized. "We're supposed to be there in half an hour."

"You'd better get over there. This isn't news which should be shared over the phone," Rick winced, "You don't want to get on the in-law's bad side right out of the gate."

"We'll bring her back," Alexis said. "Sarah Grace? Hunter? You two want to come with us? We're going to see Grandma Bridget."

"Yeah," Hunter nodded eagerly. Kevin's mom had been making up for the lost time with him by spoiling him rotten, and Hunter was loving it.

"We have to get your mom to dial it back," Alexis reminded Kevin.

"You tackle that one," Kevin laughed, "She doesn't listen to me."

"Dad, get Italian for dinner and something chocolate for dessert," Alexis kissed her father goodbye.

"We'll be back soon," Kevin took Sarah Grace's hand when they left.

Alexis pulled Hunter close as they walked and took Kevin's free hand.

"Mommy isn't trading me in for a new family, is she?" Maggie asked her grandfather.

"Never," Rick promised. "You are stuck with us for the rest of your life, Maggie Mae."

"Okay," she kissed his cheek and then went back to playing with Jo.

"That was easy," Kate observed.

"She just wants to be reassured she can still be the center of attention," Rick chuckled.

"She's Martha reincarnated," Kate smiled.

"Oh, yeah," Rick kept laughing.

"Martha would be so happy for Alexis right now," Kate commented.

"So would Chris," Rick wrapped his arms around her waist, "Wonder if Alexis has called Meredith, yet?"

"Let's see, Chris died, Meredith sent a telegram," Kate began. "Alexis was in the hospital, and Meredith never bothered to show up. I doubt she's high on Alexis's call list right now."

"You're probably right," Rick sighed.

"Don't you dare feel guilty. _You_ are a wonderful father," Kate smiled. "Alexis has three happy, healthy, and well-adjusted kids because she had you."

"I guess you have a point," he nodded.

"Yes, I do," Kate put her arms around Rick's neck. "And you know I'm never wrong."

"Just because you claim never to be wrong, doesn't mean you actually are never wrong," he chuckled, "I can point to a dozen…"

He was stopped from talking by an elbow in his ribs.

"So, Italian for dinner," Castle said. "Where should we order from?"

"There's only one place in New York worth ordering from, and you know it," Kate laughed, "Pick up the phone and order."

"Chicken, shrimp, eggplant, and veal," Castle nodded. "Call that bakery down the block and order something decadent, okay?"

"On it," Kate pulled out her phone and called in her own order.

-d-d-d-d-

"Oh Kevin, I'm so happy for you two," Bridget hugged her son tightly after Alexis and Kevin announced their engagement.

"Thanks, Mom," Kevin accepted her hug.

"You beautiful girl, you," Bridget hugged Alexis next.

"Told you she'd be happy for us," Kevin flashed her a wide grin.

"Bridget, Dad's ordering dinner. We'd love if you came and joined us in a celebratory meal."

"I wouldn't want to impose," Bridget stammered in reply.

"It's a family meal. You're family," Alexis pointed out.

"That's so sweet," Bridget smiled. "I actually have plans tonight."

"Really?" Kevin looked surprised.

"Someone special?" Alexis eyed Bridget curiously.

"Jim and I are having dinner," Bridget admitted.

"Jim," Kevin coughed out, "Jim Beckett?"

"Yes, Jim Beckett."

"That's so cute," Alexis smiled.

Kevin sent a scowl in his fiancée's direction. He didn't like this new development one bit.

"Since you're busy, we'll have dinner another time," Alexis smiled and took Kevin's hand. "Sarah Grace, Hunter, come say goodbye to Grandma. We're going back to the loft."

"We just got here," Hunter moaned while flipping through the pile of baseball cards his grandmother had given him upon his arrival.

"I know, but Grandma has plans tonight. We're going to get out of her hair," Alexis said.

"Thanks again for the baseball cards, Grandma," Hunter scrambled over and gave her a hug.

"No problem, Hunter," Bridget smiled.

Sarah Grace stepped in with a hug of her own, "Bye, Grandma."

"Goodbye, Sweetheart," Bridget pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"We'll see you soon," Alexis said. "Right, Kevin?"

"Yeah," Kevin gave a begrudging nod. He was still stewing from the recent bomb his mother dropped on him.

The four walked towards the elevator. Alexis let the kids run ahead before turning to Kevin.

"She's an adult."

"She's my mother," Kevin replied.

"She deserves to be happy," Alexis countered.

"I know, but she's still my mother and…" Kevin sighed.

"You still think of her as being married to your dad," Alexis finished.

"Well yeah," he nodded.

"I think your dad would want your mom to move on," Alexis replied, "Kinda like I know Chris did of me."

"I'm being a jerk, aren't I?"

"No, you're being human. She looks really happy, Kevin," Alexis pointed out, "You want that for her, don't you?"

"Yes, and I know my dad would want that too."

"Then you have to let her," Alexis replied, "I know it's not easy, but it's the right thing to do."

"You've always been my voice of reason," Kevin turned and smiled at her, "No matter what the situation."

"It's one of my many charms," Alexis smiled, "Let's get back to my dad's. There's dinner waiting, and I'm starved."

"Me too," Kevin put an arm around her.

=d=d=d=d=

"Oh my God, it smells good in here," Alexis gushed as she let the quartet into the loft.

"It should, it's from your favorite Italian restaurant," Rick was laying out all the takeout containers.

"And I have dessert," Kate walked in behind them.

"Please tell me it's something chocolatey," Alexis's eyes widened, "I have such a wicked craving right now."

"It's chocolate, I promise."

"You are a saint," Alexis smiled.

"Saint Kate," Kate mused.

"I'll alert the Pope after dinner," Rick stated before rounding up the children for dinner.

"Mommy, it smells so good in here!" Maggie hopped up and down.

"Are you hungry, Maggie Mae?" Alexis tugged on a strand of her hair.

"Yes," Maggie nodded with wide eyes.

"Then we'd better feed you," Alexis nudged her towards the table.

"Don't forget me," Jo tagged along.

"Of course not," Alexis ushered her sister towards the table.

"I thought you were bringing your mom back," Kate said to Kevin.

"So did I," Kevin said.

"Bridget already had plans," Alexis explained.

"Oh yeah? Who with?" Kate asked.

"You knew," Kevin realized by the look on Kate's face.

"Rick and I had dinner with them a few nights ago," Kate nodded.

"Are you okay with it?" Kevin asked. Jim had been alone a lot longer than his mother.

"It's good seeing my dad happy," Kate replied, "They're so cute together."

"Okay," Kevin nodded.

"You have a problem with it?"

"It's the first time she's shown an interest in dating since Dad died."

"I'm not going to lie. It was tough to watch my dad move on at first, but I know my mom would want him to be happy."

"And Kate's never wrong," Alexis smiled.

"Will you tell that to your father," Kate laughed, "He didn't believe me earlier when I said it."

Alexis giggled and took a seat.

"I have some news," Rick stated once dishes had been passed around and everyone was digging into their meals.

"Kate's leaving you for Espo?" Alexis teased.

"That's not even the tiniest bit funny, Daughter," Rick scowled at his oldest child.

"What's the news, Castle?" Kevin asked.

"You know how you've been pressing me about moving to Brooklyn?" Rick continued on without waiting for an answer to his question, "Well, I contacted the realtor you two were using. She's shown me several listings. I liked a couple so much, I bought them."

"Them?" Alexis repeated in surprise, "As in more than one property?"

"Two properties in fact," Castle confirmed.

"Isn't that a bit excessive for you and Kate?" Alexis replied.

"It would be if they were both for us. One of them is for you, Kevin and your brood."

"Dad!" Alexis exclaimed, "How could you do something like this without consulting me and Kevin?"

"I didn't want you having to go through all the hassle of securing financing and signing all those papers," Rick replied, "You'll love the place. I guarantee it."

"Castle, I appreciate the offer, but we don't want a handout."

"Kevin's right," Alexis chimed in, "We both have jobs which pay us well enough to afford to food, clothing, and a roof over the heads of our family."

"It's a done deal, and I managed to secure the house next door. The work on the tunnel is set to start immediately after we close."

"You're seriously going through with that," Alexis replied.

"Absolutely," Castle nodded. "It's a great idea."

"Only you, Castle," Kate shook her head in amusement.

"Are we even going to like this place?" Alexis asked.

"Absolutely," Rick replied, "The realtor told me you loved the place when you were shown it."

"Is it the house on Hamilton?" Alexis's eyes lit up in excitement.

"It certainly is," Rick replied.

Kevin noted the excited look on his fiancée's face. "We will take the house on one condition. We'll pay you back in monthly installments."

"Seems a bit ridiculous," Rick frowned.

"No, it's completely reasonable," Alexis said.

"We can discuss terms at a later date," he replied, "Tonight is a night to celebrate the engagement of my daughter."

"Okay," Alexis smiled and looked at Kevin. "We'll figure it out later."

Kevin nodded in agreement.

"So, we're all moving," Kate nodded. "It's gonna be weird."

"I'm still keeping the loft," Castle announced, "I'll be turning it into an office of sorts."

"Just don't do anything to our bedroom," Kate gave him a look.

"Does my bride have plans for the space?" Rick raised a curious brow.

"We'll need some place close by for lunch."

"Just lunch," Rick snorted before taking a drink from his glass of wine.

"Subject change before we go down a road I don't want my kids to hear," Alexis said.

"Have you two talked wedding details?" Kate asked.

"Not yet," Alexis shook her head. "We've both done either end of the spectrum."

"Maybe we'll meet in the middle," Kevin smiled at her.

"Sounds like a good place to start," Alexis smiled.

"I want to wear a pretty dress," Maggie chimed in.

"Me too," Jo chimed in.

"So do I," Sarah Grace admitted.

"Then we'll get you pretty dresses," Alexis smiled.

"We have to wear ties, don't we?" Hunter sulked.

"We'll see about that," Alexis replied.

"Ties aren't so bad, Buddy," Castle did his best to cheer up his grandson.

"They're annoying," Cade chimed in for his older brother.

"Cade, you sound just like your dad," Alexis smiled fondly.

"Did he wear ties?" Cade asked.

"He wore one when we got married," Alexis nodded.

"Oh," Cade replied.

"We'll talk about wardrobe later," Alexis smiled.

"Do you know where you want to have it?" Kate asked.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded after sharing a look with Kevin. "We were thinking of the house in the Hamptons."

"If that's okay with you, Castle," Kevin added.

"I think that's a wonderful idea," Rick smiled.

"One detail down, about a million more to go," Kate kidded.

"If only you were kidding," Kevin shook his head.


	61. Chapter 44

Anyone still with us?

-d-d-d-d-d-

Kevin opened the trunk at the foot of Alexis's bed to find a lighter blanket. Digging around he felt something solid and pulled it out. It was a sparkling white photo album. He closed the trunk, sat down on top of it and opened the album. The first picture was of Alexis and Christopher. Alexis wore a simple white dress while Christopher wore a dress shirt and dress pants. They were in front of a chapel with wide grins.

"Did you find that blanket?" Alexis asked when she came into the bedroom after tucking in the children.

"Uh, yeah," Kevin looked up with a slightly guilty expression. "I found something else in the trunk."

"What are you looking at?" she looked over his shoulder to see that he'd found her wedding album, or at least what there was of it, "That's where that went."

"You didn't put it in there?"

"No," Alexis shook her head. "I couldn't even look at it after Chris died. Dad said he'd put it away for me."

"Sorry, I'll put it back," Kevin offered.

"It's okay," Alexis assured him. "There's a lot of good memories attached to those pictures."

"Do you mind me looking through it?" he asked.

"No," Alexis lay on her back so that her head was at the foot of the bed while Kevin leaned back. "If you want to know anything, just ask."

"So it was just you, Christopher, and a preacher?" he began flipping through the book.

"No, my dad and Kate came," Alexis smiled. "King, Meredith, and Chris's brother came too."

"The one that Cade is named after, right?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "He was a good guy. Uh, Kev, we should talk about him."

"About your brother-in-law?" he looked to her in confusion.

"Yeah. I told you he was bipolar that night we had coffee after I went off on you," she started.

"Right," Kevin nodded.

"Bipolar disease is hereditary is some cases," Alexis admitted.

"What does that have to…oh, Cade and Maggie?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "There's a chance, a small chance, that Cade or Maggie might have that gene."

"If they start showing symptoms we'll deal with it," he assured her.

"Cade was the big brother," Alexis turned her head to get a look at the picture of Christopher and Cade that Kevin had turned to. "If he loved you, there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for you. The day we got married, he thanked me for putting a smile back on Chris's face."

"Why was it missing?" Kevin asked.

"Do remember that serial killer I told you about? Baitfish?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"He murdered Chris's first love."

"I can sympathize, sort of," Kevin responded, "I lost my love once, but by some miracle I got her back."

Alexis smiled at him sadly and put her hand on his face, "I told you I was part of the team that found Cade, right?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"I didn't tell you I nearly passed out or threw up over the side of the railing outside the room. I just missed hitting a hooker and her client."

Kevin cringed at the image.

"Chris looked out for his brother as much as he could, but it broke his heart to see Cade spin in and out of control."

"If it happens with Cade or Maggie, we will do whatever it takes to help them," Kevin reached for her hand.

Alexis let him take it and closed her eyes, "There's something else we need to talk about."

"I'll talk about anything with you," he brought her hand to his lips.

"Legally, Chris was Hunter's father," Alexis reminded him.

"It doesn't bother me," Kevin assured her.

"You can't tell me it doesn't bother you that Hunter's last name isn't Ryan."

"Yeah, it bothers me, but Chris was a big part of my son's life."

Alexis took advantage of Kevin holding her hand against his cheek and lightly drummed her fingers against his skin, "Maybe we should change that."

"You'd be willing to allow me to give Hunter my name?"

"There's no allow, Kevin," Alexis smiled. "As much as he was Chris's son, he's also yours. He should have your name. He should have always had your name."

"Hunter Ryan," Kevin beamed with pride, "Has a good ring to it."

"I'd love to honor Javi, but he's keeping the middle name I gave him," Alexis told him.

"Agreed," Kevin nodded.

"Would you be alright allowing Hunter to keep Chris's name, maybe hyphenate it?" she asked.

"Hunter LaSalle-Ryan," Kevin tried it out. "I like that. Yeah, I'd be okay with it."

"Good," she replied, "We'll talk to Hunter about it...see if he's okay with it."

"Okay," Kevin looked back at the album and smiled at a picture of Kate and Alexis. "Meredith didn't show?"

"My mom? No."

"She was invited, wasn't she?"

"Of course, but you know her," Alexis nodded, "She's always done her own thing."

"Yeah, I know," Kevin frowned. "I'm sorry she wasn't there for you."

"Me too," Alexis admitted.

"Maybe the next time," Kevin offered.

"Yeah, maybe," Alexis smiled. "Turn the page."

Kevin did so and had to smile. Christopher and Castle stood with Hunter held between them.

"Chris was such a proud papa," Alexis traced Chris's face with her finger.

"He was a good one," Kevin commented.

"Yes, he was," Alexis nodded. "So are you."

"Tell me about the night Hunter was born," Kevin requested.

"I thought Kate did already," Alexis frowned.

"I want your account."

"It was full of drama," Alexis stated, "Dad will tell it better, I'm sure."

"I want to hear it from you," Kevin repeated.

"We were stuck at the NCIS office. It was just Chris, King, and me," Alexis rolled onto her side. "I was terrified."

"I'm sure you were," he curled a lock of her hair around his finger, "Every first time mother is."

"I'm sure you were more terrified than Jenny the night Sarah Grace was born," Alexis commented. "You and Javi did almost burn to death."

Kevin frowned at the reminder of his ex-wife. "It was a crazy night. It certainly made being able to hold Sarah Grace for the first time a bit more emotional."

"Chris was a good support system," Alexis smiled fondly. "He never faltered."

"And King delivered Hunter," Kevin added.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "It's why he will always be family no matter how far off the deep end he goes."

"Some day I want to meet this man."

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "We'll make it happen."

"Maybe on the way back from our honeymoon," he suggested.

"What kind of wedding do you want?" Alexis played with her engagement ring.

"Whatever wedding you want," he replied, "You did the no frills wedding last time. If you're wanting the lavish affair, I'd be willing to give it to you."

"I've seen pictures of your wedding," Alexis reminded him. "They were all over Kate's Facebook page. You did the lavish affair. Why don't we do what my dad and Kate did on a smaller scale?"

"Get married in the Hamptons?"

"Why not?" she asked.

Kevin considered it and then nodded, "Yeah, I'd like that. That place has some good memories for us."

"It has some good memories all around," Alexis smiled, "So best man duty - Javi obviously."

Kevin nodded as he put the album aside and moved to lie next to Alexis on the bed, "Maid of Honor?"

"I think I'll ask Kate," Alexis nodded.

"How are we going to incorporate our children in the wedding?" Kevin asked.

"Sarah Grace could be a junior bridesmaid, the boys can stand with you and Javi, and Maggie can be the flower girl," Alexis smiled.

"I love that idea," Kevin smiled, "Are you sure the boys are okay with all this wedding stuff? Hunter gives off an uncomfortable vibe whenever the subject is brought up."

"It's not you. He's just conflicted," Alexis frowned. "We've been talking about it. Kev, he likes you. That's kind of the problem. He feels a little disloyal."

"I get that," he sighed, "Maybe we should hold off on discussing Hunter changing his name until he gets a bit more used to me being around."

Alexis turned on her side and laid her hand on Kevin's face gently, "I hate that I caused this."

"I don't blame you," he assured her.

"You don't have to. I have that covered," Alexis lay her head flat on the bed. "Do you remember that night in the park before I was stabbed?"

"You mean when I put my foot in my mouth and made a total ass of myself?" he asked.

"No, when you told me I should have come home," she smiled sadly, "That we could have worked it out and been a family."

"I was angry when I said all that," Kevin apologized, "I'm sorry for what I said."

"No, you were right," she replied, "I should have come back or stayed in the first place."

"Lex," Kevin tried to stop her from apologizing again.

"I need to say this. I thought about coming back every day. God, the night I landed in New Orleans, I was five minutes away from going to a ticket counter and getting a ticket back to New York."

"Lex, you don't owe me…"

"I have kicked myself every way to Sunday," she cut him off, "I guess part of me hoped that you'd come to New Orleans to get me back, and when you didn't…"

"I wanted to," he chimed in, "I don't know how many times I picked up the phone to buy a ticket."

"I know what stopped me," Alexis said. "What stopped you?"

"Fear," he replied, "Fear that I'd fly all the way to New Orleans and have my heart stomped on."

"Again," Alexis added.

"Right."

"God, we both made so many mistakes," she sighed heavily. "When we were driving back to New York, my dad asked me about you. Well, he didn't know he was asking about you at the time, of course. He wanted to know what happened. I told him I did the hurting."

"Why did you take all the blame?" Kevin asked.

"I thought I deserved it," Alexis said.

"We equally deserve the blame," he replied, "How about we make a pact?"

"I'm listening," her eyes focused on his.

"From this moment on, we don't look back at those mistakes we made," he suggested, "We look forward. We look towards the future that we're building together as a family."

"I'll agree to that," she smiled at him. "I'm gonna love you forever, Kevin Ryan."

"Good, Alexis Castle LaSalle," he smiled back, "I'm going to love you forever, perhaps longer, if I'm lucky."

Alexis drew closer to him and kissed him.

Kevin tugged her close to his chest.

"We're both lucky," she carded her fingers through his hair, "Through all the mistakes and pain, we found our way back to each other."

"Thank God," Kevin whispered softly.

"I love you, Kevin Ryan," she felt she needed to repeat.

"I love you," he smiled. "Tired?"

"Not even a little bit," she shook her head.

"Good," he pinned her to the bed.


	62. Chapter 45

Alexis stepped onto the homicide floor and smiled at Kevin, who was standing near the murder board. Though she was exhausted from her long night in Autopsy, she felt refreshed just by the sight of him, with his arms crossed while concentrating on their current case.

"Hot Case, Detective?" Alexis quietly approached him, "Or just hot detective?"

"What's up, Doc?" Kevin smiled at her.

"Such a cornball," Alexis rolled her eyes. "You spend too much time with my dad."

"Yes, I'd much rather spend my time with the cuter Castle," he grinned, "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"It's been almost twenty-four hours since we've seen each other," she sat next to him. "We're very close to breaking one of our rules."

"Rules, huh?" he responded, "Are those written rules?"

"No, these are rules we made together," Alexis reminded him. "If you'd rather we forgo a kiss, I can go home and sleep."

"Hey, I don't think so," Kevin reached for her arm when she turned to walk off.

Alexis looped her arms around his neck and smiled, "Hi."

"Hi," he pressed his lips to hers, "Long night?"

"How does Detective Slaughter manage to keep his badge?" Alexis rolled her eyes.

"He must have something on the mayor," Kevin shrugged.

Alexis giggled before she turned serious, "I miss you."

"We both have the weekend off," Kevin reminded her, "I was thinking we could get my mom to take Sarah Grace and Hunter for the weekend, and maybe your father could take Maggie and Cade. We could steal away to the Hamptons for a quiet weekend together, just like the old days?"

"Hmm, I like the sound of that," Alexis smiled. "What will we do in that big old house all by ourselves?"

"I think we'll come up with some ideas between now and then," he replied, "We could leave right at five on Friday, so long as we don't catch a case before then."

"I'll call my dad as soon as I leave," Alexis promised. "I do have to ask, how many of those ideas have me on my back?"

"Every last one," he grinned proudly.

"Good," she pecked at his lips.

"This is a police station. Can't you two act accordingly?" Javier grumped as he walked by them.

"What bee flew up his butt?" Alexis scowled at her lover's partner.

"He and Lanie are fighting," Kevin nodded.

"What'd you do this time, Espo?" Alexis asked.

"Why do you always assume it's me that did something?" Javi glared at her, "There are two in my relationship."

"Did he tell you?" Alexis asked of Kevin.

"Won't say what happened," Kevin shook his head.

"Well, you're the detective, riddle it out of him," Alexis poked him in the ribs.

"It's probably the same problem they always have," Kate commented as she walked over. "Hey, Alexis."

"Hey, Kate," Alexis smiled. "And that problem would be the commitment thing?"

"That's the one," Kate nodded, "Honestly, Javi, how can you be this clueless when it comes to relationships?"

"Why am I the one that gets ganged up on? Why don't you ever gang up on the leprechaun?"

"He's the father of my son," Alexis smiled.

"He held my hand when I was in labor with Ian until Castle could get there," Kate smiled. "Why was Castle late again, Javi?"

Kevin snorted into Alexis's hair at Javi's very uncomfortable expression.

"What's the story there?" Alexis asked.

"I'll explain it on the drive up this weekend."

"This weekend?" Kate asked.

"Right," Alexis smiled. "Kate, would you and Dad mind taking Cade and Maggie for the weekend?"

"We'd be happy to," Kate smiled, "What about Hunter and Sarah Grace?"

"My mom," Kevin smiled. "I just have to ask her."

"Well, if she's not up for it, we'll take all four," Kate replied, "What's the plan for the weekend?"

"Hopefully a quiet weekend in the Hamptons," Alexis replied.

"Not if I have my way," Kevin whispered.

Alexis gave him a look.

"You're still a screamer, aren't you?" he continued to whisper, smiling when Alexis turned the same color as her hair.

"Ryan, I need to speak with you in my office," Gates emerged from her office.

"Sure," Kevin nodded and followed Gates into the office.

Alexis frowned when the Captain shut the door behind them.

"That doesn't look good," Javi winced, "She never closes the door."

"Is it me or does she look even more unhappy than usual?" Alexis asked. "It's not against the rules to kiss at work, is it?"

"I hope not, or Castle and I are next for the-never mind," Kate blushed.

"Esposito, I need you to cuff Detective Ryan and read him his rights," Gates emerged minutes later.

"Say again?" Javi looked dumbfounded by his boss's orders.

"Sir, please tell me you're joking," Kate looked behind Gates and saw Kevin staring at the floor, his badge and gun on Gates's desk.

"I wish I were," Gates replied.

"What's going on?" Alexis asked.

"Detective Ryan is being charged with murder," Gates said.

"Murder?" Alexis gasped.

"I'm sorry you have to see this, Doctor LaSalle," Gates motioned Karpowski to do the arrest. Her officers were too close to the situation.

Alexis covered her mouth in shock and to try to keep herself from sobbing.

When Kevin emerged from the office in cuffs, Alexis immediately rushed over.

"It's just a misunderstanding," Kevin assured her, "This will be cleared up by dinner time."

Alexis kissed him and then whispered, "I love you, no matter what, I love you."

"I love you too," he replied.

"Come on, Alexis, I'll drive you home," Kate offered, "Javi will stay and figure everything out."

"You stay, I'll catch a cab to Dad's. Your dad has all the kids today. God, I have to call Kevin's mother," Alexis furiously wiped away some tears.

"We know he didn't do this," Kate assured her stepdaughter, "We're going to figure this out. I promise."

"I know," Alexis hugged her stepmother.

"I'll call you when we get the details," Kate walked her to the elevator.

"Yeah," Alexis nodded as she stepped onto the elevator. She did her best to keep her composure, but it was a fight she was doomed to lose.

-d-d-d-d-d-d

Alexis sat in the living room of her dad's loft, her knees drawn up and her heels resting on the edge of the couch cushion and her arms across her stomach. She was looking at the ceiling, watching the light from the setting sun play across the surface.

"Kate called from the precinct," Rick touched his daughter's shoulder, "You alright?"

"No," she shook her head. "I know him, Dad. He didn't do this."

"I know that too," Rick handed her a tissue to wipe at her eyes, "This situation is eerily familiar."

Alexis nodded, "That was my first thought too, but he's dead, right? Espo took him out."

"Yes. Kevin checked his pulse."

"Then a copycat," Alexis offered, "Kevin didn't do this. I would swear on my life, on your life."

"Alexis, calm down," Rick soothed. "Have you talked to him?"

"Not since he was first arrested," Alexis shook her head. "He's probably in interrogation or with his lawyer right now. Karpowski had to do it. Javi couldn't get the words out."

"We're going to figure it out," Rick assured her, "Do you know what Kevin was doing the night of the murder? Were you two together?"

"For awhile," Alexis wiped at her eyes, "But we had a fight."

"What about?"

"I told him he needed to stop making the face he always makes when Jenny's name came up."

"Is that it?" Castle asked.

"Sarah Grace was seeing it. It was affecting her," Alexis replied, "She's already dealing with her mother being locked up. She didn't need her father's negative influence...Oh god, Dad, both of Sarah Grace's parents could be locked up. We can't let that happen."

"I've known Kevin for over fifteen years. He's not a person who would kill. Yeah, he's got a temper, but he'd never go that far. Espo maybe, but not Kevin," Castle shook his head.

"Really Dad? You could see Espo killing someone?"

"You've never seen him when someone takes the last donut," Castle said wryly.

Alexis snorted. "What are we going to do?" she wiped at her eyes again.

"First of all, I'm getting Kevin a better lawyer," Castle picked up his cell phone. "You are going to wash your face because the kids will be here any minute. You don't need to scare them."

"What do I tell Sarah Grace?" Alexis asked.

"That her father will be home soon," Castle says. "Have you talked to Bridget?"

"Yeah. All of Kevin's sisters were over," Alexis said. "They're freaking out."

Alexis disappeared into the bathroom to splash water onto her face just when the children came through the door.

They all greeted Castle excitedly while Jim herded them in.

"How were they?" Castle asked his father-in-law.

"Great," Jim nodded before lowering his voice, "Katie called me. How's Alexis holding up?"

"Not well," Rick replied, "She's splashing water on her face. Does Sarah Grace know anything?"

"No," Jim shook his head. "I'd be careful. This is going to be news, Rick."

"Sarah Grace, Hunter, Alexis and I need to talk to you for a few moments," Rick got the attention of the two kids after Jim left.

"Why us?" Hunter asked.

"Because we're grounding you two," Alexis joked. "Ian, can you take everyone else upstairs?"

Her brother nodded and motioned for everyone to follow.

"Did we do something wrong?" Sarah Grace fidgeted nervously.

"No, Sweetie," Alexis smiled at her as they sat down on the couch. "I was just kidding about the grounding thing, but my dad and I do have to tell you something."

"Where are Grandma and Kevin?" Hunter asked, "Aren't they home yet?"

"No, they're not," Castle sat on the coffee table. "Something's happened that you two are going to hear about, and we wanted to be the ones to tell you."

"Are they okay?" Sarah Grace's voice quivered, "Dad wasn't shot, was he?"

"No, he wasn't shot," Alexis assured her. "Sweetie, he was arrested."

"What!" Sarah Grace exclaimed, "Why?"

"There is evidence that puts him at the scene of a crime where someone was killed," Castle said.

"Dad wouldn't do it. He catches the people who do that," Sarah Grace stated.

"Sarah Grace, look at me," Alexis said. "We know your dad didn't do this. He's not that kind of man."

"Can I see him?" Sarah Grace asked.

"I'll find out," Alexis said. "Hunter, you're awfully quiet."

"Is he going to jail?" Hunter asked softly.

"No," Alexis and Castle spoke and unison.

"We're going to figure this out, Hunter," Castle assured his grandson.

"We wanted to tell you two before you saw it on the news," Alexis said. "Right now, I bet your grandma would like to hear from you, Sarah Grace."

"May I use your phone?" Sarah Grace pointed towards the cordless phone on the counter.

"Of course," Castle nodded. "Go ahead."

Sarah Grace found some privacy and called her grandmother while Alexis and Rick talked more to Hunter.

"You okay, Pal?" Castle asked.

"I wasn't nice to him at first," Hunter said quietly.

"Well, at least you didn't call him Defective Wyan," Alexis smiled as she imitated her youngest.

"I was mad at him for being my dad," Hunter continued to frown, "I didn't want a new dad. I wanted my dad...I mean, Chris."

"Chris is still your dad," Alexis assured him, "Kevin being your father doesn't change that."

"He loves you, Mom," Hunter said.

"He loves you, too, Buddy," Alexis smiled.

"What if he goes away?" Hunter asked.

"I don't know," Alexis shook her head, trying not to cry. "We'll cross that bridge if we come to it."

"I want to see him."

"Okay," Alexis nodded. "I think he'd like that."

"And I think Bridget would like to talk to you, too," Castle tilted his head toward his office, where Sarah Grace had disappeared.

"You okay, Hunter?" Alexis put her hand on her son's shoulder before tracking down Sarah Grace to speak to Kevin's mother.

"Yeah, I'm okay Mom," Hunter nodded.

"We're going to figure this out," Alexis vowed, "Kevin is not going to jail."

Hunter nodded and then hopped off the couch to find Sarah Grace as Alexis looked at her dad. She waited until the door shut, "Tell me what we need to do."

"We let Kate and Espo do their jobs," Rick responded.

"Dad, I can't just sit here and wait," Alexis responded.

"Don't. Be there for your son and stepdaughter," Castle responded, "That's what Kevin needs you to do."

"What are you going to do?" Alexis challenged him.

"Like I said, get Kevin the best lawyer I can find."

"Thanks, Dad," Alexis smiled.

"He's family, Sweetheart," Rick smiled.

"I don't know what to do next, but I can't just sit here," Alexis confessed.

"I know you're upset, but you need to stay calm."

"Calm, really?" Alexis snapped at him, "My fiancé is under arrest for murder, and you're telling me to be calm."

"Yes, because you have four kids who need you to be there," Rick reminded her.

"This entire thing is just ridiculous," Alexis replied, "Kevin didn't murder anyone. He couldn't possibly have done this. Maybe the investigating detectives read the clues wrong."

Rick sat down next to her again and put his arm around her. Alexis sighed and then leaned against him.

"It'll be okay," Rick whispered.

"I'm scared."

"There's nothing to be scared of," Rick kissed her forehead, "The best detectives in New York are working this case. They'll figure it out."

"Cops don't do well in prison, Dad," Alexis said quietly.

"He's not going to prison," Rick assured her.

"You can't know that," Alexis shook her head.

"But I do," Rick replied, "Kate and Esposito will not let whoever is doing this get away with it. They will call everyone they need to."

Alexis nodded, "Go make that call. Find the best lawyer you can."

"Consider it done," he replied.

Alexis watched as her dad walked into his room for some privacy and then got up to get herself something to drink. She was standing at the sink when she doubled over and threw up.

At first, she thought it was just the nerves getting to her while she washed the evidence down the drain, but then she had another thought.

"Oh, no." She started to count and then she gripped the counter, "Oh, God."

"Everything alright, Sweetheart?" Rick entered the kitchen.

"I have to run out. I want peanut butter with honey in it," Alexis grabbed her purse and ran out the door.

"Alexis, is that really the right time for that," Rick called after her, but it was already too late. Alexis was out the door before he could finish his sentence.

-d-d-d-d-

"Okay, stay calm. Calm down," Alexis waited for the timer to go off as she stood in the bathroom of a Starbucks. "This can't be happening, not now, not again."

There was a knock at the door that frightened her.

"Someone's in here," Alexis called out.

"For half an hour," the voice on the other side of the door said. "C'mon girl. You never take this long."

Alexis stared at the door. She knew that voice, "Lanie?"

"Open up," Lanie replied, "I know it's you. Javi pinged your cell phone for me."

Alexis opened the door, "I thought you weren't talking to Javi."

"Special exceptions are made when one of our best friends was arrested on a bogus murder charge," Lanie responded.

"Come in," Alexis reached out and yanked Lanie into the bathroom. "I think I'm in trouble."

"No kidding," Lanie replied, "Your fiancé is in lock up. I'd say that qualifies."

Alexis shut the door, "No, not that kind of trouble. The kind of trouble that would have my father saying 'That boy will marry you' if we were living in the fifties."

"What?" Lanie looked towards her protégé for a moment until it dawned on her, "Alexis, are you…"

"I don't know," Alexis said. "The timer hasn't gone off yet."

"How much time is left?" Lanie asked, just before the timer dinged.

"I can't look," Alexis shook her head. "Lanie?"

Lanie took the stick from the counter, read it and then the instructions to make sure she read the results correctly. "How do you feel about doing the diaper routine again?"

"Oh God," Alexis leaned against the counter.

"Calm down," Lanie said. "Let's go to the lab and I'll run a blood test."

"Oh God," Alexis repeated.

d-d-d-d-d-d

Here we go…


	63. Chapter 46

Hello everyone. Tell us something good –

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis smiled at Kevin when he sat down across from her. She picked up the phone, and he did the same.

"You are a sight for sore eyes," Kevin touched the glass and waited for her to do the same.

"You okay?" Alexis asked, "Are they treating you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. Beckett pulled a few strings. I'm not in gen pop."

"Thank God," Alexis breathed. "We all miss you. Maggie wants me to tell you she promises she'll never call you Defective Wyan again."

Kevin gave a snort of amusement. "Is everyone doing okay?"

"Yeah, for the most part," Alexis nodded. "Javi's trying to drive himself into an early grave looking for evidence to clear you."

"Sarah Grace, Hunter...are they okay?"

"Jenny's mom filed for custody of Sarah Grace," Alexis admitted. "Right now, she's staying with me because the doorman can keep the press away, but Mrs. O'Malley won visitation."

"Great," Kevin frowned, "That's what I was afraid of. That opportunist is going to use this as a way to show I'm an unfit parent."

"Dad found Bridget a good lawyer," Alexis assured him. "Believe me, your mom has more support than your former mother-in-law."

"Any leads yet?"

"Half the force is pounding the pavement," Alexis said. "No one believes you did this, Kev."

"That's reassuring," he grumbled.

Alexis looked at their fingers on either side of the glass, "I'd give anything to be able to hold you right now."

"Yeah, me too," he replied.

"This is all going to work itself out," Alexis replied, "Espo is working twenty hours a day."

"Lex, if I-"

"No," Alexis shook her head.

"Listen to me," he insisted.

"Not if you're going to tell me I have to let you go. I did that once this lifetime. I'm not doing it again."

"Lex, the evidence I saw is overwhelming," Kevin insisted, "Houdini himself couldn't get me out of this. I didn't do this. I love you for believing me, but we have to face facts. I'm going away for a long time."

"You can't," Alexis shook her head.

"We have to be realistic," Kevin stated, "Maybe it's best that Hunter keep Chris's last name."

"Stop talking like this," she snapped at him, "You sound like you're ready to admit defeat. I'm not. My dad's not. Espo's not. Kate's not. You're not. Focus. Go through every little detail of your days leading up to being arrested. There has to be something that doesn't quite fit."

"You don't think I have? I've run through every detail of every day for a week before I was arrested. Lex, there is-"

"I'm pregnant," Alexis said suddenly.

"What?" Kevin's eyes went wide in disbelief.

"I peed on a stick, and it was positive. I had Lanie run a blood test which confirms the results. If you won't not give up for me or yourself, then don't give up for your kids."

"Alexis," tears wells in his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't going to tell you until we got you out of here, but I couldn't stand you talking about giving up. We need you, Kevin. I believe in you, and I need you to believe in you."

"I'll keep thinking," he choked down his emotions.

"Go back more than a week," Alexis told him, "This looks to have been planned longer than that."

"I will," he nodded. "Promise me you'll go to a doctor soon? One who works on the living?"

"I made an appointment as soon as Lanie gave me the results," she assured him.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you," she smiled, "Stay positive. Kate got my dad out of a situation just as bleak as yours currently is. This is just going to be a bad dream soon."

"God, I hope so," Kevin smiled a little.

"Lanie wants me to tell you she sends her love," Alexis said. "Hunter told me last night he wants to add your name to his."

"We should hold off," Kevin shook his head.

"No," Alexis shook her head.

"Lex, I'm not giving up, but if this goes the wrong way, having my last name is going to set him up for a lot of pain."

"What about when this child is born? What name do you want me to give it? What about Sarah Grace? She has your name."

"I'm not saying 'no' forever. I just saying we should hold off for a bit."

"Kevin," Alexis protested.

"Please?"

"Fine. For a bit," Alexis agreed reluctantly.

"Any ideas about what it'll be?" he asked.

"Not yet," Alexis shook her head. "It's weird. When I was pregnant with Hunter, I just knew it was a boy from the moment I found out I was pregnant."

"It's weird now because?" Kevin prompted her.

"I have absolutely no clue," she responded, "It's like my brain is sending me mixed signals."

"Twins?" Kevin teased.

"I'll kill you," she giggled.

"You'll kill me if it's twins?" he chuckled.

"My body would never bounce back from twins."

"I'd be willing to help you with some exercises," Kevin smirked.

Alexis smiled, "Don't think I'm crazy because I know this might sound nuts, but if it's a girl, I want to name her Daisy."

"Daisy?"

"The first time you gave me flowers? They were daisies."

"And for a boy?" he asked.

"Joseph after the friend you told me about," Alexis smiled. "Joseph Javier, no matter where I am when I have it."

"With a little luck, in a hospital this time."

"For Daisy, we'll make her middle name Bridget?"

"Daisy Bridget LaSalle-Ryan," Kevin smiled.

"Just Ryan," Alexis corrected him.

"You sure?"

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "I loved Chris, but he's not this baby's father. You are."

A guard came behind Kevin and tapped his shoulder. Their time for the day was up.

"I love you," Alexis said.

"I love you. Think of me tonight. I'll think of you."

"I'll think of you always," she touched the glass once more.

Kevin hung the phone up and let the guard lead him away while Alexis watched with tears falling down her cheeks and an idea starting to form in her head.

-d-d-d-d-d-

Alexis dialed the phone and waited.

" _DiNozzo."_

"Hey, Tony," Alexis replied, "It's Doctor LaSalle. We met at a conference a few years ago."

" _I remember,"_ Tony responded, _"I'd never forget a pretty redhead."_

"Careful or I'll start thinking you and Gibbs actually are father and son," Alexis said. "Speaking of Gibbs, I heard he finally retired to Mexico."

" _Yeah, he wasn't allowed in the field anymore after the bullet to his lung and tying him to a desk would've driven everyone crazy."_

"Couldn't keep taking those head slaps forever, huh," Alexis smiled.

" _Exactly. So, what can I do for you?"_

"I heard you inherited his team. Did you also inherit his debts?"

" _You needing to cash in a favor?"_ Anthony asked.

"Yes," Alexis nodded. "My fiancé was arrested for murder. He's innocent."

" _I'm listening,"_ Anthony began jotting down notes while Alexis gave him the details.

"His name is Kevin Ryan, and he's a homicide detective in New York. Tony, there is an overwhelming amount of evidence against him. The detectives on the case keep hitting dead ends trying to prove his innocence. In fact, the only thing I have to prove he's innocent is my gut."

" _Guts are very powerful,"_ Tony responded, _"Gibbs taught me that."_

"He's a homicide detective, Tony. He's going to have enemies everywhere. Kate and Javi are running themselves ragged chasing down every potential lead, pouring through all his old case files. They need help."

" _I have some vacation days coming to me. I can be in New York tomorrow,"_ Tony said. _"Would your friends be insulted if you brought in outside help?"_

"They'll deal," Alexis said firmly. "Tony, you know what happens to cops in prison."

" _Yeah,"_ Tony responded, _"Do you mind if I bring a few of my own? McGee can be a valuable asset."_

"Bring whomever you can," Alexis said.

" _We'll be in tomorrow morning,"_ Tony said. _"Where should we meet?"_

"I'll pick you up. Text me where and when."

" _I'm going to call in a few favors,"_ Tony stated, _"I'll see you soon."_

"Thanks, Tony," Alexis smiled.

-d-d-d-

"You called in Feds?" Javier looked at his partner's fiancée.

"Don't be mad," Alexis immediately went on the defensive, "I trust these guys. Chris trusted them. They won't step on toes, and they always get the bad guys."

"So do we," Javier frowned.

"Have you looked in a mirror lately, Javi? You look like death warmed over."

"My partner is locked up," Javi responded, "I'm not going to rest until he's free and clear."

"Javi, I know you are doing everything you can," Alexis began, "I can't wait any longer. I need my fiancé."

"I know," Javier nodded.

"No, you don't," Alexis shook her head. "At least you don't know the whole story."

"What don't I know, Lex?"

"I'm pregnant," she whispered.

"You're what?" he exclaimed.

"Shh! You, Lanie, and Kev are the only ones who know right now."

"Kevin knows?"

"I went to visit him, and he started to talk like he was giving up. He said I should move on with my life. It just flew out of my mouth."

"That's a hell of a thing to just fly out."

"Don't start," Alexis warned him as she perched on his desk. "Where's Kate?"

"Getting coffee," he responded.

Alexis looked at Javier, "How are you?"

"I'm fine," he responded automatically.

"You're a bad liar, Espo."

"I gotta get back to this," Javi pointed towards the pile of files on his desk, "I'll let you know if we find anything."

"Get some sleep," Alexis told him. "You don't want to scare Kevin with that face you make when you don't get enough sleep, do you?"

"I'm fine," Javi responded, "Just need some coffee, and I'm good to go."

"Okay," Alexis said. "Be careful, okay?"

"I'll do my best."

"I mean it, Javi," Alexis said sternly. "You know you're godfather, right?"

"I'd better be."

"See you later," Alexis smiled slightly while walking to the elevator.

-c-c-c-c-

Alexis stood in the doorway of Hunter's room and watched him sleep.

It wasn't just his eyes which reminded her of Kevin.

"Lex, get some sleep," her father spoke softly. He hadn't let her spend a night alone in her apartment since Kevin had been arrested.

"I can't," Alexis shook her head. "Doesn't Kate miss you?"

"She's not home long enough right now to miss much of anything."

"This is getting ridiculous, Dad," Alexis sighed, "Kevin should be home by now."

"I know," Rick followed his daughter's gaze. "Dare I ask what you're thinking of?"

"There wasn't a day that went by for eight years that I didn't look at Hunter at least once and see Kevin."

"I should have realized sooner," Rich hugged his daughter from behind, "The resemblance is so striking."

Alexis laughed, "I shudder to think what you would've done to Kevin if you'd realized it before I told you."

"It wouldn't have been pretty," Rick conceded.

"I love him, Dad," Alexis said quietly.

"I know," Rick hugged her tighter, "And he's going to be home soon."

"Come on, we better go downstairs before we wake Hunter."

"Lead the way," Rick replied.

"You know I love having you here," Alexis peeked into the game room, "Don't Jamie, Ian, and Jo miss their beds?"

"Nah, they love having slumber parties with their niece and nephews."

"What about you? My couch is comfortable, but it's not that comfortable," Alexis said as they walked downstairs.

"I'll live," he assured her.

Alexis collapsed onto the couch, "I miss Gram."

"I do, too," Castle put an arm around her shoulder, "Now more than ever. She always had these pearls of wisdom that would see us through times like this."

"I stopped at the station," Alexis confessed. "Javi looks like hell."

"You can only work the candle at both ends for so long," Castle replied, "Both he and Kate are about at their breaking points."

"That's why I called in a favor."

"A favor?" Castle raised a brow.

"I cleared the name of an old friend of Gibbs's a few years back, and he said he owed me one. He's since retired, but the guy who took over his team also took over his debts. He'll be here tomorrow."

"Do Javi and Kate know that you called in some Feds to back them up?"

"Javi freaked a little, but he came around."

"And Kate?"

"I didn't see her."

"I should call and check in," Rick reached for his phone.

"You hungry?"

"Yeah."

"Good, I'm ordering pizza."

"Aren't you afraid that's going to wake the rugrats?" Castle asked.

"Nah," Alexis shook her head. "Even if it does, it's not like tomorrow's a school day."

"The joy of summer."

"Call Kate," Alexis got up and went to find her phone.

"Hey, Kate, how's it going?" Castle asked when his wife answered her phone.

" _Dead end after dead end,"_ Kate yawned, _"There isn't anything in these old case files that is going to help."_

"You sound beat," Rick commented.

" _I am,"_ Kate admitted.

"Then why don't you get in a cab and come over to Alexis's? We're ordering pizza."

" _Too much to do,"_ Kate closed one file and opened another.

"You sound like you're about to pass out, and Alexis says Espo looks like death."

" _We'll sleep when we catch this son of a bitch,"_ Kate responded.

"I'll bring you some clothes tomorrow morning," Rick said.

" _Thanks,"_ Kate replied, _"Espo told me about Alexis bringing in reinforcements."_

"Don't take it personally. Alexis just wants him home."

" _No, it's a good idea. Bring in some fresh eyes and a fresh perspective,"_ Kate stated.

"I love you, Katherine Beckett."

" _And I love you, Richard Castle."_

"Be careful, okay? Try to get some sleep."

" _Sleep is the enemy."_

"No, passing out while you're running after a suspect is the enemy."

" _I love you, Richard Castle."_

"I love you, too," Richard smiled. "Just stay safe."

" _Tell the kids that I love them,"_ Kate replied.

"I will," Rick agreed. "Goodnight."

" _Night,"_ Kate said before they hung up.

Rick looked behind him and chuckled softly. Alexis was asleep on the counter.

He pulled the phone out of her hand and walked her to the bedroom.

"Sleep well, Alexis," Castle whispered softly.

"Nigh' Dad," Alexis mumbled.

Castle left the room and closed the door behind him. About ten minutes later the doorbell rang. He went to answer it.

"Someone order a pie?" the deliveryman held out the pizza to Castle.

"Yeah, how much?" Rick fished out a few bills from his pocket.

"Paid for by credit card," he said.

"Here then," Castle gave him a ten. "Thanks for coming out so late."

"That's the job," the guy quickly took the cash and left.

Castle shut the door behind him and turned around to see Hunter and Ian standing at the foot of the stairs.

"C'mon. It smells like your mom ordered pepperoni and sausage."

Hunter grabbed plates and joined his grandfather and uncle for some pizza.


	64. Chapter 47

Hi everyone!

-d-d-d-d-

"Hey, I came as soon as I got Tim's call," Alexis said to Tony in the very early hours of the morning after they arrived. "What's going on?"

"We've found a paper trail," Tony boasted.

"What paper trail?" Alexis looked to him in confusion.

"It's not so much a trail as a paper nibble," Tim corrected his boss, "But it's enough to get a warrant to search for more."

"What's the lead?" Alexis looked on eagerly.

"Does the name Brenda O'Malley ring any bells?" Tim asked Alexis.

"Kevin's former mother-in-law," Alexis gasped in surprise.

"That would be the one," Tony nodded. "McGee discovered she's been taking money out of her accounts. She's been doing it a little at a time so as to not raise suspicion, but added together it comes to half a million."

"Half a million dollars!" Alexis's eyes went wide.

"Yes," Tim nodded.

"It gets better," Tim wasn't finished with his show and tell, "We also discovered the rogue finger print from Kevin's apartment wasn't from a realtor as originally thought. We ran it through AFIS, and it hit on a recent parolee. This parolee happened once upon a time to share a cell next to the infamous 3XK, who was rumored to enjoy blabbing about his crimes."

"We were able to ping Ms. O'Malley's cell phone next to the cell phone of this man a day before the murder Detective Ryan is alleged to have committed," Tony got into the act and pulled a photo from the file in his hands, "Meet Stanford Smith, baddie for hire."

"I can guess why they did this, but how? I've met Brenda O'Malley. She was upper middle class. She's not a master criminal."

"With a daughter and husband both doing hard time," Tim replied, "All she has left is her granddaughter, but her son-in-law has full custody."

Alexis felt for a chair, and Tony took her arm to help her, "You okay?"

"Yeah, just a bit light headed," Alexis sat down quickly.

"Beckett is getting the warrant," Tim replied, "With a little bit of tough love, we can get Mr. Smith to confess to framing Kevin."

"You'll have your fiancé out with plenty of time for cake tasting," Tony beamed with pride.

"I could kiss the both of you," Alexis laughed.

"Don't even think about it, Doc. You're marrying my partner," Javi spoke up.

"How long on the warrant?" Alexis asked Javier.

"Gates is waking a judge as we speak. Kate was going to, but she's a little short on charm right now."

"Imagine that," Alexis went to hug her fiancé's partner.

"The minute the judge releases Kevin, I'm going with you to get him."

"Deal," Alexis replied.

"It's not over just yet," Tim spoke up, "We've got to get Smith to roll over on Ms. O'Malley."

"Too bad we can't use the method they used in the old days. King said something about a broom closet and a phone book," Alexis said.

"Beckett will get him talking," Javier spoke up, "She always does."

"I hope so," Alexis said.

"You eat lately?"

"I had some toast on the way out the door."

Javier gave her a look and then picked up the phone, "I hope you guys like tacos."

"Bring it on," Tony rubbed his hands eagerly.

They all were completely unaware of what time of day it was. One of the benefits of living in a city that never slept, they could get tacos at any time of day.

"Make sure there are some steak options," Alexis smiled.

"Got the warrant," Kate held up the signed document as she entered the bullpen.

"We don't exactly have jurisdiction, but can you use some backup?" Tony offered Beckett some assistance.

"Gates already okayed it," Kate said. "Alexis, you are staying here."

Alexis wanted to protest, but she knew better, "I'll keep the tacos warm."

"Just leave us some, okay?" Javier smiled at her.

"Get him, Javi, but be safe in doing it," Alexis asked.

"We will," Javier promised.

-d-d-d-

Alexis sat on the break room couch staring at the ceiling. She'd been waiting for most of the day.

"Dr. LaSalle, how are you?"

"Fine, Captain. Yourself?"

"Doing good. Beckett and Esposito still out serving the warrant?" Gates asked.

"As far as I know. I think I owe you an apology for calling in the Feds without asking first."

"I should have called out for help as soon as Ryan became a suspect," Gates took a seat next to her.

"Thank you for backing him up. It means a lot that you believe in him," Alexis smiled.

"He spent far too long in lock up. That's on me," Gates replied, "Kevin's a good cop but a better man."

"With a little luck, he'll be home tonight with me and the kids," Alexis smiled.

"I hope so," Gates smiled. "Does he know?"

"Know?" Alexis asked.

"I'm a woman and a mother, Doctor," Gates reminded her. "You can't be very far along."

"I'm not," Alexis's hand went to her abdomen.

"So?"

"Yes, he knows. I didn't plan on telling him, but it just kind of came out."

"News like that has a way of slipping out," Gates chuckled.

"I just want him home," Alexis said.

"I've got a judge on speed dial. The minute this man confesses, I'm on the phone."

Beckett and Javi came in with a man in cuffs. "Call that judge," Beckett announced, "He confessed on the ride over. He's going to write his statement right now."

"Get my partner out," Javi added.

"I'm on my way," Gates said walking to her office.

Alexis smiled at the officers and then at Tony and Tim.

"You want a ride?" Tony held up the keys to his rental car.

"Javi?"

"She's got one," Javier caught the keys Kate was tossing in his direction.

"Don't either of you leave town," Alexis warned Tony and Tim. "You're having dinner at my place tomorrow."

"Deal," Tony replied.

"Go," Kate ordered. "By the time you get there, Gates should have the release handled."

Alexis and Javi made a mad dash for the vehicle.

"You okay to drive?" Alexis asked him.

"Found my second wind," Javier assured her.

"Then let's go," Alexis smiled.

-d-d-d-

Alexis tapped her fingers together while she and Javier waited for Kevin.

"What is taking so long?" Alexis asked for the tenth time.

"Hurry up and wait," Javier looked out the window at the setting sun. "The motto of the government."

"I'm going to pop out this kid in the time it takes for them to release Kevin."

"God, I hope not," Javier muttered.

"Why not, Espo? Don't you know anything about birthing babies?" Alexis giggled.

"I know enough to know it's best for trained professionals to deliver them," he replied.

"What a wimp," she rolled her eyes.

"You say wimp, I say self preservation," Javier snorted.

Alexis glanced at her watch again, growling in frustration when it was only moments since she'd last looked at it. Gates should have come through on the paperwork by now.

"Alexis, calm down, okay?"

"That's a tall order," Alexis began to pace.

"You're going to wear out those soles," Kevin's voice filtered into the conversation.

"Oh my God," Alexis flew into his arms.

"Finally figure it all out, Partner?" Kevin extended his hand to Javi while Alexis clung to him.

"Wanted to tie it up in a pretty bow for ya," Javi confirmed.

"I'm okay, Lex," Kevin laughed. "I promise."

Alexis took the reassurance as permission to hug him tighter. "I missed hugging you."

"I missed hugging you too," he smiled.

"Are you alright?" she pulled back and began checking him for any visible injuries.

"I'm good, Lex," Kevin stared at her. "You, on the other hand, look exhausted."

"I feel exhausted," she admitted, "Javi is, too. You might need to drive us back to the station."

"Deal," Kevin smiled as Alexis released him. He took the opportunity to hug Javier, "Thank you."

"I'd like to take credit, but Alexis called in some reinforcements to help us crack the case," Javier replied.

"I knew you weren't going to just sit back and wait," Kevin smiled at her.

"Can you blame me?" she asked, "The bed was cold."

"Let's go home, so we can get into it."

"Yes, let's," she agreed.

-d-d-d-d-

"Hello?" Alexis called out as she and Kevin walked into her apartment.

They were met with complete silence.

"That's really weird. The kids should be home with my dad," Alexis shed her coat.

"We didn't call ahead. Maybe Castle took them to dinner."

"Yeah, maybe," she nodded, "Are you hungry? I can make you something."

"Honestly? I just want a shower and our bed," Kevin confessed.

"How about you shower?" she steered him towards her bedroom, "I'll make us something. You've been eating prison food for too long. You need something tasty to remind you what it's like on the outside."

"I can think of something else that's tasty," Kevin turned and put his hands on her hips. "Care to join me for a good cleansing?"

Alexis gave him a wide smile and nodded, "We'd better be quick. The kids could be home at any minute."

"Trust me, I'm a little short on foreplay right now."

"I bet you are," she darted into the bedroom with Kevin hot on her tail.

-c-c-c-c-

Alexis finished shredding cheese just as Kevin came out of the bedroom, running a towel through his hair to dry it.

"Something smells good," he commented.

"It's called Bubble Pizza. This goes on after it's cooked for twenty minutes."

"I told you I wasn't hungry," he wrapped his arms around her waist after stepping in behind her.

"I know, but I am. You might be soon," she relaxed against him. "Feel better?"

"Much," he nodded, "It was good to wash the prison off me. Hope you had no attachment to the clothes I was wearing because I'm tossing them."

"None whatsoever," she tipped her head back to rest against his shoulder. "It'll be good to fall asleep with you tonight."

"Could not agree more," he brushed the hair away from her neck and began nibbling.

Alexis giggled, "That tickles."

"How hungry are you?" he murmured.

"Famished actually," she admitted.

Kevin turned her around and examined her face, "Please tell me you've been eating and sleeping."

"I have," she nodded, "Just not as much as I probably should."

"You're eating, and then you're going to sleep," Kevin decided.

"After the kids get home," she picked up the phone to call her dad, "He needs to bring them home now."

"Agreed. I should call my mom."

Just as Alexis began to dial, the door burst open with kids filing in.

"Daddy!" Sarah Grace ran to her father immediately.

"Oh God, am I glad to see you," Kevin hugged her tightly.

"Did you break out of jail?" Maggie asked when Hunter took his turn at hugging.

"No," Kevin shook his head. "Uncle Javi and Grandma got me out along with some friends of your mom's."

"Yay!" Maggie cheered as Castle hugged his good friend.

"Dad, pack up. I love you guys, but you gotta go home. Kate needs to see you more than I do," Alexis said.

"You kicking your old man out?" Castle chuckled.

"Absolutely," Alexis gave him a big toothy grin.

"Rick, thank you so much for everything," Kevin shook his friend's hand.

"No problem," Rick smiled. "Jo, Ian, Jamie, you heard your sister. Pack it up."

"Yay!" Jo cheered, "We get to see Mommy!"

"Speaking of moms," Alexis looked at Kevin and tilted her head.

"Right. I'll be in your office," Kevin motioned.

"Guys, go get in your pajamas," Alexis instructed the remaining children.

"But," Hunter protested. He'd gone a few weeks without being able to bond with his father.

"I didn't say bed, I just said pajamas," Alexis narrowed her eyes.

"Okay," he followed his siblings to their rooms to change.

"Thank you," Alexis saw her dad and siblings to the door after everyone had packed up. Once they were gone, she went back into the kitchen to finish making dinner for herself and Kevin.

The man in question came in after her a few moments later.

"Hey, how is she?"

"She cried with relief," Kevin rubbed at his neck to release some tension.

Alexis pulled out the pan and put it on the counter to cool before she climbed up onto the breakfast bar and motioned for Kevin to sit in front of her. Then she began to rub his neck and shoulders.

"That feels good," his head rolled forward.

"Good," she smiled. "God, you're tight as a drum."

"Been a rough few weeks," he muttered.

"Tell me about it," Alexis kissed the back of his head. "Maybe after you spend some time with the kids, you should take a soak in the hot tub."

"That's a good idea," he nodded, "Too bad you can't join me."

"I'll wait in bed, and we can practice another type of stress relief," she whispered.

"Deal," he chuckled.

Just as he finished talking a stampede came down the stairs.

"Did you guys get enough to eat with Grandpa?" Alexis asked.

"We had pizza and sundaes," Cade smiled.

"How about you guys pick out a board game we can all play together after Kevin and I eat our dinner?" Alexis suggested.

"Okay," Hunter nodded, and they went back upstairs to pick a game.

"Candyland!" Maggie followed her brother up the stairs.

"Yuck!" Cade frowned as he too went upstairs.

"You feel better?" Alexis asked Kevin.

"Yeah."

Alexis wrapped her arms around Kevin in a loose hold, "You're home."

"Finally," he nodded.

"You need to buy Espo several rounds next time you're out for drinks," she told him, "He was like a man possessed."

"I'd buy him a damn brewery if I could afford it," Kevin chuckled. He put his hands on Alexis's arm and rested his head back against her shoulder. "I thought I was never going to be here again."

"Was never a doubt in my mind they'd clear you," she caressed his cheek.

"I'm skipping the hot tub tonight. After the kids are in bed, I just want to be with you."

"I won't complain," she smiled.

"Good," he smiled at her.

The kids came thundering back down the stairs with a board game and eager smiles.

"Help them set it up. I'll put our dinner on plates. Beer?"

"Yeah, that sounds good," he pecked at her cheek.

"What are we playing?" Kevin followed the kids with his arm around Sarah Grace.

"Candyland," Maggie smiled.

"Sounds like fun," Kevin chuckled, "Sarah Grace and I used to spend hours at a time playing."

"So did Dad and I," Alexis gave Kevin a plate and a bottle of beer before she sat down with her own meal.

"You can go first," Maggie told Kevin.

"Thanks Maggie Mae, but you're the youngest. You go first."

"Okay," Maggie drew her first card.

Alexis smiled at Kevin as the game started.

-d-d-d-

Alexis looked up when Kevin came into their room, "Everyone asleep?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded, "Sarah Grace was the last to go down. Don't think she wants to let me out of her sight right now."

"I know the feeling," Alexis put aside the book she was reading.

"What are you reading?"

"A mystery I've read about twenty times. It's comforting to read something you know the ending to when your life is going to hell. Speaking of going to hell, Javi called while you were up with the kids. Apparently your former mother-in-law is requesting a meeting with you."

"I'll meet with her after she's behind bars for good."

"Can I offer an opinion as to why she wants a meeting?"

"Sure," Kevin sat down next to her on the bed.

"I think she wants to know what you plan to tell Sarah Grace."

"The truth," Kevin replied.

Alexis nodded, "I know I haven't always been the most honest person, but as much a fan as I am of the truth, does Sarah Grace really need to hear all of it?"

"She's going to find out eventually," Kevin responded, "I'd rather it be from me."

"I know. You're right," Alexis nodded as she scrunched down on the bed. She looked towards the balcony doors, "I wish it was raining."

"And why is that?" he climbed under the covers next to her.

"Because I'm looking to revisit an important moment in our history," Alexis smiled. "You and me on a balcony in the rain."

"Another time," he chuckled, "We have plenty of rainstorms left to enjoy."

"For now we should make up for lost time," she guided his lips to hers.

"God, did I miss you," Kevin grinned right before his lips met hers.

"Missed you more," she proclaimed.

"Prove it," he challenged.

"Gladly," she gave a gleeful giggle.

-d-d-d-


	65. Chapter 48

"Hello?" Kate walked into Alexis's apartment after letting herself in with Rick's key the morning after Kevin was released.

"Hey, Beckett," Kevin grinned as he took a drink of his coffee.

"How are you?" she hugged her friend.

"Best night of sleep ever," he replied.

"I'll bet. Where is everyone?"

"Alexis, Maggie and Sarah Grace are still asleep. Cade and Hunter are watching a movie upstairs in the game room," Kevin replied.

"Is Alexis okay? She's seemed off even before this."

"She's great," Kevin gave her a curious smile.

"Oh, tell me," Kate knew that grin. Kevin had a secret.

"You have to ask her," Kevin replied.

"Kevin Ryan!"

Kevin grinned and took another drink from his cup.

"How long do you think Gates is going to allow me to take off?" Kevin tried to change the subject.

"She wants to see you," Kate admitted.

"Maybe I can spare an hour," Kevin replied, "We're taking the kids to the park today."

"The department is issuing an official statement today announcing your innocence and their regret in their premature arrest of such an exemplary detective."

"How kind of them," Kevin grumbled.

"You know everyone was just doing their job," Kate put a hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah, I know," Kevin nodded, "Speaking of doing their job, thank you for going above and beyond in yours."

"You'd do the same for me," Kate replied.

"I would, but I think I'd sleep every so often," Kevin agreed.

"I'd make him," Alexis declared as she joined them. "Morning."

"Morning," Kevin took a kiss from her, "How'd you sleep?"

"So good," she smiled.

"Me too," he kissed her a second time.

"I think I'll see what the boys are watching," Kate disappeared upstairs.

"Kate knows something is up," Kevin whispered.

"She's a good detective," Alexis nodded. "My dad is, too. Think we should tell them?"

"Only if you want," Kevin caressed her back softly.

Alexis covered her abdomen with her hand, "The first time I waited until I was six months pregnant before I told my dad."

"How'd he take it?" Kevin asked.

"He yelled for a while and demanded I tell him who the father was," Alexis leaned back against the counter. "When he calmed down, he begged me to move home. I was honestly surprised he never said anything to you or Javi."

"He might have, but I was so devastated you left," Kevin admitted, "I blocked out anything he said about you."

Alexis played with his shirt, "If it helps at all, I didn't stop crying for three months after I left. People looked at me like I was crazy. One of my psych professors asked me if I wanted the name of a good therapist."

He didn't know how to reply, so he hugged her instead.

Alexis smiled and inhaled his scent. There were a lot of things she'd missed about Kevin and being held by him was near the top of the list.

"Mommy, I'm hungry," Maggie made her presence known.

"What would you like for breakfast, Miss Maggie?" Alexis smiled while lifting her daughter onto one of the stools.

"Fruit loops," Maggie replied.

"Of course," Alexis reached for the milk carton and the box of cereal.

"And how did you sleep, Mags?" Kevin asked the young girl.

"Good. Sarah Grace was quiet last night," Maggie smiled.

Alexis turned around and exchanged a look with Kevin.

"I'd better go check on her," Kevin replied.

"On your way, make sure Kate didn't tie up the boys or vice versa," Alexis smiled. "It's too quiet up there."

Kevin nodded and made his way upstairs.

He poked his head in and smiled at Kate and the boys before he continued down to where Sarah Grace was sleeping.

"Hey, Pumpkin," Kevin entered her room to see she was awake, "Been awake long?"

"No," she smiled at him. "Daddy? Are you gonna stay?"

"Where am I supposed to be going?" Kevin sat on the bed next to her.

"Back to jail," she said softly.

"I'm not going back there," he assured her, "They found the evidence they needed to clear me."

"Really?" she looked at him with big eyes.

"I promise," he smiled. "I do need to talk to you about something."

"What?" she asked.

"It's about Grandma Brenda," he started.

"She was trying to get custody of me away from Grandma Bridget," Sarah Grace stated, "I didn't want to stay with her. I kept telling her that."

"I know," Kevin smiled. "I don't want you to worry about that anymore. You're not gonna see Grandma Brenda anymore."

"Why not?" she asked.

"Sarah Grace, your grandma did something very bad. She was arrested."

"What did she do?" Sarah Grace asked. "Did she try to hurt Alexis too?"

"No, Sweetie. She tried to hurt me," Kevin admitted. "She was the one who tried to make it look like I committed a very bad crime."

"Why did she do that?" she couldn't comprehend why anyone would want to hurt her father.

"Because I have you, and she doesn't have your mom and grandpa."

Sarah Grace continued to look at him in bewilderment.

"She's angry at me because I don't love your mom anymore."

"That's a dumb reason," Sarah Grace replied, "Is she going to jail like Mom and Grandpa?"

"It looks like it," Kevin nodded. "Speaking of your mom, she'd still like to see you on a regular basis."

"Is it okay to see her?"

"No matter what went on between her and me, she's still your mom," Kevin said. "If you want to see her, I won't stop you."

"Thank you," Sarah Grace hugged him.

"I missed these hugs," Kevin hugged her tighter.

"Me too," Sarah Grace smiled.

"Get dressed, Pumpkin. I'm going to the station for a little bit, but then we're going to have a fun day together with Alexis and her kids," Kevin told her.

"Okay," she hopped out of bed.

-d-d-d-

"Captain?" Kevin poked his head in.

"Ryan," Gates got to her feet and walked around her desk with her hand out. "Welcome back."

"Thank you, Sir," Kevin nodded and shook her hand.

"Did One PP give you back your weapon and badge?"

"Yeah," he nodded.

"How's your family?"

"We're all sleeping a lot better," Kevin smiled.

"I'm sure you are," Gates nodded.

"One PP said you needed to sign this," Kevin handed a form over.

"Of course," Gates gave the document a once over before she signed and handed it back to him, "By the way, congratulations, Ryan."

"Sir?"

"You and Dr. LaSalle," Gates made a motion of a belly bump.

"She told you?"

"I'm a woman and a mother, Ryan," Gates smiled. "It didn't take much to figure out. If Beckett hadn't been so distracted recently, she would've figured it out already."

"She knows something is up," Kevin smirked, "She hasn't figured out what just yet."

"Give her a few hours," Gates looked out her window to where Kate was concentrating, her brow furrowed.

"I'll never be able to thank her and Javi enough for the countless hours they put in on this," Kevin looked towards Beckett.

"Make her godmother," Gates advised. "I think Dr. LaSalle already made Esposito godfather."

"Not a bad idea," Kevin responded.

"Now, you're reinstated. You've got your gun and badge. Go be a cop," Gates advised.

"Sir, if you don't mind, I'd like to take a few personal days to be with my family," he replied.

"Of course," Gates nodded. "I'll clear it for you. Go ahead."

"Thank you," he replied.

"See you in a few days, Ryan."

"Anything else, Sir?" he asked.

"Yes," Gates looked at Beckett again. "Put her out of her misery."

"I'll talk to Lex," he chuckled, "It really should be her decision who we tell."

"Alright. Go on," Gates waved him on. "Enjoy your family."

"With pleasure," he smiled, "Thank you again for all you did."

"Of course," Gates smiled.

Kevin went back into the squad room, and Kate looked up, "Hey. Everything okay?"

"Yeah, got my badge and gun back. I'm officially back to work. My first act back, I'm taking a few days off," Kevin replied.

"Of course you are," Javier came over with a grin. "Good to see you, Man. You look a lot more human than you did last night."

"You, too," Kevin teased.

"Good night's sleep," Javier grinned.

"Me too," Kevin smiled.

"Oh good God," Kate rolled her eyes.

"Everything alright, Beckett," Kevin looked towards Kate.

"Yeah, I just forgot for a moment what working with two guys, one who is still fourteen half the time, was like."

"Better get used to it," Javier chuckled.

"I missed it," Kate smiled. "Alexis said something about dinner tonight?"

"Yeah," Kevin nodded. "Seven at the apartment. You are all invited."

"Alexis cooking?" Javi asked.

"Nah, Castle's paying to have it catered," Kevin responded.

"We'll see you at seven," Kate smiled.

"Lanie's invited too, Javi. Make sure you call her."

"I'll pass along the message," Espo nodded.

"Do you have my car keys?" Ryan asked his friend.

"Yeah, they're in my desk," Javier walked back to his desk.

Kevin followed and stopped Javier from turning around as he whispered, "If it's a boy, it's Joseph Javier no matter where Lex gives birth."

Javier couldn't stop the proud smile to spread across his face at Kevin's words, "You could call him J.J."

Kevin smiled back, "It's a thought."

"See you tonight," Javier shook his partner's hand.

-d-d-d-d-

Alexis considered her shoes in the mirror with a frown.

"Wear slippers," Kevin advised from behind her.

"Don't tempt me," Alexis turned around. "You want help with your tie?"

"I can manage," he fiddled with it.

"You know what, take it off," Alexis said before she returned to the bathroom. She came back out in track pants and a T-shirt with Tulane on it. "I'm going for comfort tonight."

"Really," he yanked at his tie to remove it.

"Wear a T-shirt and jeans," Alexis picked up her cell phone and sent a mass text. "Tonight is about saying thank you to our friends. We don't need to be wearing suits, ties, and dresses to do it."

"Not gonna argue with the pregnant lady," he tossed his tie on the bed and striped off his dress shirt.

"Smart man," Alexis smiled as she kissed him.

"It's so good to be home," his arms encircled her waist and kept her close.

"Well, this is a temporary home. Soon we'll be moving into the permanent one," Alexis looked around them.

"I can't wait," Kevin smiled.

"But for tonight, let's go celebrate. Laissez les bon temps rollez," Alexis smiled.

"My French is a little rusty," Kevin smiled.

"Let the good times roll," Alexis giggled.

-d-d-d-

"Hey Espo," Alexis opened the door to Kevin's partner. "No Lanie?"

"On her way," he smiled. He gave his hostess a once over while he loosened his tie. "You're taking this casual thing to heart."

"I was not in the mood for heels," Alexis smiled. "Kevin's getting the bar ready."

"I'll help myself," Javi immediately darted for it.

Alexis started to close the door when someone knocked on it. She pulled it open again to Tim and Tony, "Hey, guys. Come in."

"For you," Tim handed her a bottle of wine.

"Thank you," Alexis closed the door behind the men and walked over to Kevin and Javier. "Hey, Tim brought wine."

"I should be giving you guys the wine," Kevin offered the two federal agents a handshake, "Lex says you guys really went above and beyond."

"She saved a friend of our old boss's," Tony said. "I inherited his debts, so she collected."

"And you know, anything for love," Tim smiled.

"Amen to that," Kevin replied, "If there is ever anything I can do for either of you, I'm a phone call away."

"We'll remember that," Tony took a glass of scotch while Tim took a beer. "I'm gonna go check out the appetizers."

"I'll join you," Esposito followed him.

"By the way, I read Deep Six," Kevin remarked. "It was good."

"Yeah," Tim's eye raised with intrigue, "I've always flirted with writing a few more, but the team is a bit hesitant to let me."

"Why?" Alexis took a glass of water from Kevin.

"Some difficulties arose the last time," Tim admitted.

"Really?" Kevin asked. "Can't be any worse than the Nikki Heat mess."

"How's that?" Tim inquired.

"A seriously disturbed man confused fantasy and reality," Alexis shook her head. "He started killing people and reporting it to Detective Heat. Then he tried to kill Detective Heat."

"Something similar happened to me," Tim confessed.

"Really?" Alexis asked. "Too weird."

"Hey, if you two are telling war stories, get over here," Tony said.

Everyone congregated into the middle of the room just as Kate and Rick came in with their children.

" _Pirates of the Caribbean_ is on upstairs," Alexis told her siblings while she took a seat on the arm of Kevin's seat with her legs stretched across his lap.

"Castle, Tim was just telling us about when life imitated art with his novel," Kevin stated.

"And we almost lost our favorite forensics tech," Tony commented.

"Yeah, thanks for the reminder," Tim frowned.

"I almost lost my future wife," Rick said.

"We smack Timmy's hands with a ruler any time he gets the itch to write," Tony glared at his cohort.

"I've been tempted myself," Kate looked to Castle.

Everyone laughed at Castle's expression.

Alexis smiled down at Kevin when she felt his hand rub her calf.

 _Ding-Dong_

"That's probably Lanie. Espo, you mind?"

"With pleasure," Javier grinned.

"Now Tony, how do you know my daughter?" Castle asked.

"Two ships which have passed in the night," Tony began.

"And how closely did they pass?" Kevin glared at the federal agent.

"I was spoken for," Alexis reminded Kevin.

"Tony's also spoken for," Tim chimed in.

"I didn't know that," Alexis said. "Who's the lucky girl?"

"Tony's equal in every sense," Tim chuckled, "She's always had a way of putting him in his place."

"Do we know her?" Alexis asked.

"Don't think so," Tony shook his head, "She'd worked for NCIS for many years, but she left before I'd ever made your acquaintance. Her name is Ziva."

"Exotic," Lanie commented as she made her entrance.

"She's Israeli," Tony nodded and approached the good doctor. "I don't think we've been introduced."

"Tony DiNozzo, Tim McGee, this is Dr. Lanie Parrish," Alexis introduced.

"It's a pleasure," Tony shook her hand.

"Likewise," Lanie said before she looked to Tim, "You look familiar. Have we met?"

"Don't believe so," Tim shook her hand, "It's good to meet you."

"You, too," Lanie smiled.

"Lanie, you want a drink?" Alexis started to shift to get a glass of wine for her friend.

"I've got it," Javier said.

"Thanks, Espo," Lanie smiled at her on again, off again flame.

"No problem," Javier smiled as Lanie sat down.

"It's quiet," Lanie observed, "Did you give the kids sedatives?"

"Movie," Kevin smiled. "Pirates keep kids quiet for some reason."

"It's the swashbuckling nature," Tony responded, "Keeps me entertained for hours too."

"Proving yet again that Tony's just a big kid," Tim took a dig at his boss.

"Hey, it's a good movie," Rick defended.

Kate gave her husband's cheek a kiss, "You're a big kid, too."

"What did Gates have to say?" Rick asked Kevin.

"She's glad I'm back," Kevin said. "Also, she willingly cleared a few days off for me to spend with my family."

"Enjoy it while you can," Espo advised him, "You'll be lucky to get any vacation time for your honeymoon, Partner."

"We have to set a date first," Alexis pointed out as she played with her ring.

"The sooner the better if you ask me," Kevin ran his hand along her calf.

Alexis smiled down at him and tipped his head up to press a light kiss to his lips.

"You know I don't know how I feel about my boy marrying a girl who wanted to take a guy into a broom closet with a phone book in order to get a confession out of him," Javier grinned.

"That right there is the product of listening to one too many war stories," Tony said.

"That is the product of wanting my fiancé out of prison where he clearly didn't belong," Alexis ran her fingers along the nape of Kevin's neck.

"A broom closet and a phone book?" Rick looked at his daughter.

"It's how King used to do it," Alexis explained, "Or at least claimed to."

"He learned from Dan McClain," Tony stated. "One of the Fed Five."

"Fed Five?" Lanie looked confused.

"I know this story," Kate said.

"Please share," Rick looked to his wife with intrigue.

"The Fed Five were three NIS agents and two probies who took down the Privileged Killer," Kate said.

"The probies were Gibbs, our old boss," Tim said.

"And King," Alexis finished.

"I should head to Mexico for a few weeks and spend some more time with Gibbs," Rick thought out loud, "He'd make for a very entertaining character in my novels."

"He'd shoot first and ask questions later after what happened with Tim," Tony said.

Tim rolled his eyes.

"So, Alexis, now that this frame up is behind us, when do you think you and Kevin will find time to make an important walk?" Lanie asked her co-worker.

"Soon, I hope," Alexis smiled.

"How about now?" Javier chuckled, "The gang's all here."

"We are missing a few people," Alexis reminded him.

"I think Javi's onto something though," Kevin entwined his fingers with hers, bringing her ringed hand to his lips. "We could make a few calls."

"Partner, I was joking," Javi's face turned serious quickly.

"Don't say it unless you mean it," Alexis told Kevin quietly. "Because you know I'll say yes."

"Then say yes, because I mean it," he looked her dead in the eyes, "How about it, Dr. LaSalle? Willing to make an honest man out of me?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded as leaned down kissed him. "I love you."

"Are you two being serious right now?" Espo's eyes darted between the pair.

"Kate, I need a maid of honor," Alexis smiled at her stepmother.

"Holy damn," Javier realized they were serious.

"And I need a best man," Kevin looked at Javier. "You interested?"

"There until the end," Javier nodded.

"Wait, Kevin, we need a license and rings."

"On it," Castle pulled out his phone to call in some favors.

"We're really doing this," Alexis looked at Kevin.

"Heck yes," he pressed his lips hard against hers.

"What about the kids?" she asked, "Shouldn't we run this by them?"

"Sarah Grace asked me when we were going to get married when we were getting a hot dog today," Kevin confessed.

"Really?" Alexis raised a brow.

"Yeah," Kevin smiled. "I talked to Hunter and Cade. They're okay with it."

"Guess that just leaves Maggie Mae," Alexis replied, "I'd best go talk to her."

"You want me to come with?"

"No, you call your mother," Alexis smiled.

"Kate and I will start raiding your closet for a dress," Lanie pulled Kate into Alexis's room.

"Okay, but no red," Alexis said as she walked upstairs.

"Deal," Lanie nodded.

Kevin dialed his mother's home and waited.

" _Hello?"_

"Ma, it's me. Are you sitting down?"

" _You're not back in jail, are you?"_ his mother sat down quickly.

"No," Kevin shook his head. "I'm getting married."

" _That's not news, Son,"_ his mother laughed, _"I've known you and Alexis were engaged for awhile."_

"No, we're getting married tonight."

" _Tonight!"_ she gasped, _"Oh my goodness!"_

"It just feels like the right time," Kevin smiled. "I'm calling because we want you there. I can come get you."

" _Where is this ceremony going to take place?"_ his mother asked.

"We're still working on the logistics," Kevin admitted, "Either at Alexis's apartment or somewhere nearby."

" _I'll be there as soon as I can,"_ Bridget smiled. _"First I need to call your sisters."_

"Saves me a few calls then," he smiled, "Thanks, Mom."

" _You're welcome sweetheart,"_ Bridget said. _"I just wish your father..."_

"Me too," Kevin nodded.

" _I'll see you soon,"_ Bridget vowed.

"Bye, Mom."

"Looks like we're going to need those ties after all," Javi noted.

"Come on," Kevin nodded his head towards the master bedroom. "I think we can work something out with the ones I have."

"And we should go," Tony started to excuse himself and Tim.

"This wouldn't be possible if not for you two. I'd be honored if you'd stay."

"We couldn't impose," Tim sputtered, "This sounds like a family and close friend's event."

"Nonsense," Kevin waved off their excuse, "You got me out of jail. That makes you family."

"In that case, let's go see if we can help Alexis's dad with anything," Tony shook Kevin's hand.

"You sure about this?" Javier put a hand on Kevin's shoulder once they were alone.

"Oh yeah," Kevin nodded.

"It's been an emotional few weeks," Javier replied, "You don't need to do anything rash."

"I love her," Kevin refused to be dissuaded. "She stood by me through all of this. I'm so ready to marry her."

"Okay," Javier nodded. "Gotta say, I'm kind of glad you're not waiting."

"Why is that?" Kevin inquired.

"With her being in the family way and all, Castle might have killed you for knocking up his little girl again without a ring."

"Yeah, probably," Kevin laughed.

Javier made sure he and Kevin weren't in earshot of anyone, "Anyone else know?"

"You, Lanie, and oddly enough Gates," Kevin admitted. "Kate knows something is up, but hasn't put the pieces together yet."

"She knows I know," Javier told him. "She keeps looking at me."

"Hold it together for a bit longer," Kevin patted Javier's shoulder, "I'm pretty sure Lex will want to tell everyone as soon as things are legal."

"Alright, but it's not easy being on the wrong end of Kate's death stare."

"I'm well aware," Kevin chuckled.

-d-d-d-

"I think that's her prom dress," Kate shook her head at Lanie's suggestion.

"This is ridiculous," Lanie tossed another rejected dress into the pile on Alexis's bed.

"There has to be a dress in there somewhere she can wear," Kate said.

Lanie dug into the closet again.

"Oh, now this is beautiful," Lanie pulled out an off white knee length dress. "How about this?"

"Wedding dress from her wedding to Chris," Kate shook her head, "Try again."

"Damn," Lanie tossed the dress onto the bed. The next dress was a light blue number which matched Alexis's eyes.

"It's beautiful," Kate's fingers traced the delicate lace.

"She said no red, but she didn't say anything about blue," Lanie smiled.

"It will help with the 'something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue'," Kate pointed out.

"True," Lanie smiled.

"I have to go home," Kate realized. "I have something she should wear tonight."

"Go," Lanie encouraged her, "I'll hold down the fort from this end."

"Okay," Kate hugged her friend. "Tell Alexis I will be right back and not to pick any jewelry."

Lanie began rummaging through Alexis's closet for shoes to compliment the dress.

"Lanie," Maggie ran into the room. "Mama's gonna marry Defective Wyan."

"I know, Peanut," Lanie tweaked her nose, "Are you ready for a step-daddy?"

"Uh-huh. I like him. He makes Mama smile."

"He sure does," Lanie smiled, "Do you think Mama will like wearing this dress?"

"It's pretty," Maggie's hands ran along the lace, "Like Cinderella's."

"Do I have a dress?" Alexis entered. "Where's Kate?"

"She ran home and said not to pick any jewelry."

"Oh, okay," Alexis spotted the pile of dresses on the bed, "So what's the verdict? Wearing jeans?"

"No," Lanie held up the dress she and Kate had found. "Is this acceptable?"

"I completely forgot I had this," Alexis smiled when she eyed the dress, "I wore this on a date with Kevin a long time ago."

"Oh really?" Lanie eyed her. "Then it's good luck."

"I'll take all we can get."

"Go put it on while I find you some shoes," Lanie shooed her into the bathroom.

Alexis took a deep breath before stepping into the bathroom to change. Getting married was the last thing she thought would happen that day, but when he'd asked it felt like the right time.

-d-d-d-d-

aren't we stinkers?


	66. Chapter 49

"Okay, I'm back. Where is everyone?" Kate asked as she came into the apartment and the flurry of activity which greeted her.

"All the girls are in Alexis's bedroom," Javier helped himself to another drink to settle his nerves. He was more nervous than the groom.

"Did you bring my suit, Kate?" Rick greeted his wife with a kiss.

"I did," Kate handed him a garment bag. "Espo, your tie is ugly. Take this."

"Saving the day as always," Javier quickly discarded the tie he was wearing, "Thanks, Beckett."

"No problem."

"How's the marriage license coming, Castle?" Kevin asked his soon to be father-in-law.

"Should be here in-"

 _Ding-dong_

"Now," Rick went to the door and smiled at the courier. "I believe you're looking for me."

"Good timing," Kevin grinned, "Any suggestions about who will marry us?"

"Yes," Kate said. "My mom's best friend from law school is now a judge. I called her on my way back from the loft. She was thrilled to do this."

"It's almost coming together too easily," Kevin noted.

"You two deserve a bit of easy," Kate told him, "You've had enough of the hard."

"Good point," Kevin nodded. "Rings."

"My jeweler will be here any minute," Castle said.

"I should find it odd you have a jeweler, but I don't," Kevin shook his head.

"It's all a part of being Castle," Javi chuckled.

Kate smiled at the men in her life and couldn't help the hug she gave Kevin.

"Kate, we need your help," Lanie called from Alexis's bedroom.

"Alright, I'm coming," Kate called out to Lanie before turning to address Kevin again, "I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks, Beckett, for everything," Kevin smiled.

"No problem," Kate headed for the bedroom.

"Besides the help in getting all this done, Kate and I are taking all of your kids home with us tonight," Richard told the groom.

"You're my hero right now, Rick," Kevin laughed.

The doorbell rang again and Javier went to answer it. He opened it and admitted Kevin's mother, sisters, brothers-in-law, and all of his nieces and nephews.

"That was quick," Kevin hugged everyone in turn, "Sorry for the short notice."

"Talk about waiting until the last minute," Gwen laughed. "Where is she?"

"Bedroom," Kevin nodded and all the females took off.

"The bedroom is going to burst at the seams," Tony noted just before Kevin introduced him to the men who'd just arrived.

"With any luck we'll be out of here soon," Castle picked up his cell phone as it rang.

"He's up to something," Javier remarked as their friend walked away.

"When is he not?" Kevin began pouring drinks for his brothers-in-law.

"Good point," Javier smiled.

-d-d-d-

"Oh, wow. Alexis, you look beautiful," Lanie sighed.

"Thanks, Lanie," Alexis spun around to appreciate her appearance from all angles. The dress clung to her body just enough for her to be glad she was only a few weeks along.

"I brought these. I know you wore the same earrings I used when I married your dad for when you married Christopher," Kate said giving her a box. "These are my mom's."

"Kate, I can't wear these," Alexis shook her head, "They're too much."

"Of course you can. They're old and borrowed," Kate smiled.

"Are you sure?" Alexis was overcome with emotion, "Shouldn't you save these for Jo?"

"You're my daughter, too," Kate smiled.

"Thank you," she quickly slipped the earrings on.

"You have old and borrowed," Lanie said. "The dress is blue. You just need something new."

"I have that covered," Alexis responded cryptically.

"Okay," Lanie nodded. "We better see where the guys are with their preparations."

"You stay here, Alexis," Kate commanded.

"Staying put, I promise."

"Maggie, I'm giving you the task of keeping your mother in this room," Kate told her granddaughter.

"Okay," Maggie nodded.

Alexis sat on her bed and breathed deeply.

"You look really pretty, Mommy," Maggie hoped up onto the bed and hugged her.

"Thank you, Miss Maggie."

"You look happy," Maggie smiled.

"I'm very happy," she pressed her forehead to her daughter's.

"Do you think Daddy would be happy?"

"Yes, I think he'd be happy for me."

"I want you to be happy too," Maggie hugged her again.

"Thank you, Baby."

-d-d-d-

"Look at my baby brother," Gwen smiled from behind Kevin.

"He looks a little nervous," Bridget whispered.

"I can hear you two," Kevin said.

"You alright there, Kev?" his mother asked, "You're looking a little green."

"I'm fine," Kevin rolled his eyes. He knew his mother and sister were merely teasing him. He didn't feel the least bit nervous for what was to come.

Gwen put her hands on his shoulders, "This is so great, Kevin. I'm happy for you. I knew you'd find unconditional love again."

"Again?" Kevin raised an eyebrow, "Lex is the only one I've never found it with."

"Then I'm glad you found her again."

"Me too," he rubbed his hands together anxiously.

"We have a wedding venue," Castle announced.

"Not the apartment?" Kevin inquired.

"No. You two are getting married in the park."

"The park?" Kevin repeated, "Which park?"

"The one down the street with the carousel."

"How'd you swing that, Castle?" Kate asked.

"I made a very generous donation."

"Of course you did," Kate rolled her eyes, "We'd best get everyone going."

"Okay, boys, take the groom and get out of here," Lanie ordered.

Everyone began filing out of the apartment. It was like a mini parade as the group made their way down the street to the park where a group of city workers were feverishly organizing chairs with an aisle down the center.

Kevin looked around hoping for a glimpse of his bride.

"Stop it," Javier nudged him.

"Stop what?" Kevin inquired.

"Looking for Alexis," Javier gave him a look. "She'll be walking towards you very soon."

"I just wanna be married," Kevin admitted.

"Soon, Bro," Javier smiled.

"Right," Kevin nodded.

The judge Kate had arranged for stood in front of Kevin while they waited.

A parade of woman joined the group. Kevin knew at the end of the parade was Alexis. He took a deep breath and waited anxiously.

Kate came down the aisle holding a single yellow rose. She winked at Kevin before standing across the aisle from him and Javier.

Then Alexis and Castle were standing at the opposite end of the aisle looking at him.

"Deep breath, Partner," Javier prodded him.

"God, she's beautiful," Kevin gasped.

"Oh, yeah," Espo nodded.

Castle walked Alexis down the aisle and gave her hand to Kevin. Then he looked at his friend and smiled.

"The most beautiful bride of all time," Kevin leaned in to kiss her cheek before the judge began the ceremony.

It went by in a blur. The only time they were aware of anyone besides each other was when they were prompted to say 'I do'.

"You may kiss your bride," the judge instructed Kevin after pronouncing them man and wife.

Kevin's face broke out in a wide grin just before he dipped Alexis for their first kiss as a married couple.

Their children were waiting to hug their parents, cheering in excitement.

"Sarah Grace," Alexis crouched down and balanced as best she could in her heels, "I want to thank you for being okay with this."

"Thank you for making my dad happy," Sarah Grace hugged her stepmother.

"You're welcome, Sweetheart," Alexis smiled.

"Alexis, I am so happy for you," Kate hugged her stepdaughter. "Your grandma would be happy too."

"Yes, she would," Alexis glanced towards the heavens, "Chris would too."

"He's smiling for you right now," Kate whispered in her ear, "And thinking, 'Thank God. Now I don't have to take a belt to that Yankee's punk ass'."

Alexis laughed as her father came to hug her.

"Congratulations, Sweetheart," Castle kissed her forehead.

"Thanks, Dad. Thank you for all of this."

"You're very welcome," he hugged her tight.

"Was it easier to give me away the second time?"

"Will never be easy," he replied.

"Just think of it as practice. Jo will need giving away one day."

"Oh god," Castle glanced towards his youngest daughter, "Don't even plant that seed."

"Kevin's nephew seems to like her," Alexis couldn't resist teasing him further.

"Don't start," Castle growled.

"We need a first dance," Kate smiled. "Any requests?"

"'Don't Worry Baby' by the Beach Boys," Alexis said with a smile.

Kevin tossed his phone to Javier after unlocking it. He had the song downloaded to his phone. "Javi, will you take care of it," Kevin wrapped his arms around Alexis in anticipation of their first dance.

"Absolutely," Javier nodded as he pressed play.

"You remembered, huh?"

"Couldn't listen to the song without crying for a long time," Alexis admitted.

"Made myself listen to it once a month while you were gone," he confessed.

"You're braver than I am," Alexis told him.

"Not always," Kevin pressed his forehead to hers. "Javi caught me listening to it once and ragged on me."

"Remind me to step on his foot when we dance," she replied.

"I will," Kevin chuckled in reply. "Remember when we first heard this song?"

"Yeah, I remember," Alexis nodded. "We went to dinner after the first time we slept together and this was playing. I made you dance with me."

"There wasn't a lot of arm twisting involved," Kevin smiled, "Any excuse to hold you in my arms."

"I love you, Kevin Ryan."

"And I love you, Alexis Ryan," Kevin said.

"Oh my God," Alexis giggled. "Alexis Ryan. I like that."

"So do I," he kissed her.

The song ended and Rick walked up to his daughter and Kevin, "May I cut in?"

"Is it wrong to want to punch my father-in-law right now?" Kevin frowned.

Alexis laughed, "Actually, Dad, before we dance, Kevin and I have an announcement to make."

"We do?" Kevin raised a brow.

"Yes, we do," Alexis gave him a look.

"Don't keep us in suspense," Rick quickly got everyone's attention for his daughter's announcement.

"Now?" Kevin asked.

"Yes, right now," Alexis smiled.

"Okay," Kevin nodded. "Floor's yours."

Alexis grabbed his hand and held it, "We're pregnant. Dad, now we can dance."

Rick looked at his daughter in complete shock.

"I think you broke him, Lex," Kevin chuckled while his father-in-law stood as still as a statue.

"I guess that means you and I get another go on the dance floor. What do you say, Hubby?" she giggled.

"You-you're-" Rick stammered. Then he looked at Kevin, "You slept with my daughter?"

"Castle," Kevin started to back up.

"Dad, really?" Alexis stepped in between them.

"Alexis, I'm your father. I love you, but I'm allowed to beat the hell out of him."

"Not on my wedding day," she held her ground.

"Lex," Kevin nudged her out of the way. No way was he letting his pregnant wife get in the way of her irate father.

"Castle," Kate took her husband's arm, pushed him off the dance floor and turned him to face her. "Let's get a drink. Kevin, you and Lex need another dance."

"Did you know about this?" Castle looked towards his wife.

"I'm just as surprised as you about the pregnancy, but does this really surprise you?" Kate assured him, "They're in love. They're married. They're adults."

"She's-"

"A married woman," Kate finished as she looked out at the dance floor. "Castle, look at her. Look at them. They're happy."

"She's my little girl," tears welled in his eyes as he watched her laugh and dance with her husband. All he could see was how he'd spend hours with her dancing with her on top of his feet.

"She's always going to be your little girl," Kate rubbed his shoulders.

"I just-he-"

"I know you are always gonna be mad at him for what happened when they first got together, but, Castle, if they can forgive each other, then you need to let it go."

"Is there a second option?" he asked.

"Yes, you can never see your grandchildren ever again," Kate replied. "Is that what you want?"

"Of course not," Castle looked to where the kids were all playing. "I think I'm just reacting the way I would've if Alexis had told me who Hunter's father was in the beginning."

"Yeah, well, you're nearly a decade too late on that one," she yanked on his tie, "Get over it, put a smile on your face, and go dance with your daughter."

"Yes, Dear," Castle went over to Alexis and Kevin. "May I cut in?"

"Depends," Kevin stepped between the father and daughter, "Are you going to yell at her?"

"No. I just want to dance with my daughter. Why don't you dance with your mom?"

"If you upset her, I'm going to punch you…father-in-law or not," Kevin cautioned him.

"We'll be fine, Kev," Alexis assured him. "Go dance with your mom."

"I'm sorry," Castle dutifully stated as they began their dance, "I overreacted."

"You think?" Alexis raised a brow.

"Alexis, I'm your father-"

"You always will be," Alexis smiled. "But, Dad, you are going to have to get used to the fact Kevin and I have sex."

"Are you trying to give your old man a heart attack?" he inquired.

"Yes," Alexis smiled.

"I'll make you a deal," Castle offered, "I'll find a way to be okay with you and Kevin having…"

"Sex," Alexis filled in the blank he was tripping over.

"Yes, as long as that word never comes out of your mouth ever again."

Alexis giggled, "Think of it as payback. Do you know how many times I heard you with Mom, Gina, and Kate over the years? Not to mention the time I had to bail you out of jail for your park escapade with Gina?"

"Just promise me I'll never hear you and Kevin."

"As long as you call before you come over."

"Deal," he kissed her cheek.

-d-d-d-d-d-

"You look like you're thinking very serious thoughts," Kate handed Alexis a glass of water as she sat down next to her on a bench near where all the kids were playing.

"Maybe a little," Alexis admitted.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "I was just thinking about the fact that you're responsible for all of my kids."

"How do you figure?" Kate looked to Alexis in confusion.

"I never would've met Kevin if not for you and if I hadn't, no Hunter," Alexis smiled as her oldest played tag with Kevin's nephews.

"I'll give you that one," Kate conceded, "And Cade and Maggie?"

"Two months after I left New York, I called home and you told me to do something touristy. I went on a cemetery tour and that's how I met Christopher," Alexis told her.

"You toured cemeteries?" Kate looked vaguely disturbed.

"I was pregnant, Kate. What did you want me to do? Go bar-hopping," Alexis laughed.

"Fair point," Kate conceded, "What was Chris doing on a cemetery tour?"

"He wasn't. He was on a case. Someone stuck a Master Chief in a grave with someone else. I accidentally took a picture of the scene."

"You accidentally took pictures?" Kate asked.

"Yeah, and when I realized it, I called the cops to let them know what I'd done. They pointed me towards NCIS's New Orleans office."

"I can't imagine King was too happy," Kate shook her head.

"He actually thanked me. I'd gotten something they'd missed."

"That's my girl," Kate wrapped her arm around Alexis's shoulders.

"Christopher asked me out. I told him I was pregnant and left. The next day he sent me baby products."

"Sounds like Chris," Kate laughed, "He was one of a kind."

"I'm raising cops, aren't I?" Alexis looked at her boys.

"At least one," Kate nodded, "Probably two, but Mags is an actress like her great grandma."

"What are you two doing over here?" Kevin sat down next to Alexis.

"Just talking," Alexis gave him a radiant smile.

"Alexis was just thanking me," Kate smiled. "I'm gonna go dance with my husband."

"Bye, Kate," Alexis smiled.

"What were you thanking Beckett for?" Kevin brushed a strand of hair behind Alexis's ear so nothing could obstruct his vision of her. She was positively glowing with happiness, and he knew he would remember it for the rest of his life.

"For my kids," Alexis smiled.

"Not sure how much say she had in any of them," Kevin's hand went to her stomach, caressing softly, "Think it's me you want to be thanking, for at least two of them."

"Ah, but if not for her, you and I wouldn't have met," she reminded him.

"Alright, she has a little bit to do with it, but I think I should have a bit more say than she does."

Alexis smiled and kissed him, "I love you."

"Love you more," he returned her smile.

"Hey, you two have the rest of your lives to be mushy. I want a dance with the bride and Kevin, one of your sisters says you haven't danced with her yet," Javier interrupted.

"Guilty," Kevin nodded regrettably, "Sorry, my love, you're going to have to dance with Espo."

"It's okay, I have to step on his feet for not liking our song," she whispered as they got up.

"I just think you guys could have picked a better song," Javier held his hand to Alexis.

"I don't make fun of your music choices, do I?" Alexis said.

"What's there to make fun of," Javier replied, "My music is awesome."

"Really? My dad and Kate told me about a certain dance you and Kevin did in the interrogation room in preparation for a talent show," Alexis smiled.

"And Kevin and I won that talent show," Javier replied.

"The song wasn't the greatest," Alexis said.

"I don't know what Kevin sees in you," Javier shook his head.

"Yes, you do. Stop it," Alexis smiled. "You know I'm just teasing."

"Make him happy, Lex," Javier looked her dead in the eyes.

"I will. I'm not going anywhere, Javi."

"I know," he smiled, "I've never seen him happier."

"Can I give you some advice? If you're not going to marry Lanie, let her find someone and go find someone for yourself."

Javi coughed out in surprise.

"Come on, Javi, it's been over a decade," Alexis replied, "If you're not..."

"I am...I want to," Javi responded.

"So, what are you waiting for?"

"The right moment," he replied.

"If you keep waiting, she's going to find someone else."

"I know," he nodded.

"She loves you," Alexis replied, "I hope you know that."

"I do," Javier nodded.

"And I do, too, in a completely platonic way of course."

"Thanks, Lex," he smiled.

"Isn't there a toast you're supposed to make?"

"Right," Javier coughed nervously, "Couldn't you guys have given me a little time to prepare for this?"

"Hey, blame Kevin," Alexis giggled.

"I blame both of you," he laughed, "You two were always in such a hurry to do everything."

"You have months to get ready to be a godfather."

"Bring it on," he laughed, "I'm not going to have to change diapers though, am I?"

"We'll see," Alexis laughed.

"Okay, speech time, right?"

"Right," Alexis patted his shoulder and signaled to her father to turn off the music.

Javier grabbed a glass of bubbly and cleared his throat.

Alexis stood with Kevin and everyone else found their partners as Javier started.

"Okay, so I am not used to giving speeches about happily ever after's and all that," Javier started. "The things we do for friends, right? But I am honored to have been able to be here for this and happy to see my best friend find his happy ending. He deserves it more than anyone I've ever met. So, I have to thank the woman who's giving it to him. Alexis, we've known each other a long time. You are a niece to me and I love you, too, in a completely platonic way, of course."

Alexis giggled and shook her head.

"To the happy couple," Javier raised his glass.

"Cheers," the group said.

Alexis kissed Kevin as her dad cleared his throat.

"As father of the bride, I get to say a few words," Rick said. "I love you both. Be happy."

"Is that it?" Alexis laughed, "For a writer, that's a bit short."

"I think that says it all," Rick smiled. "But I can go into detail if you like."

"No," Alexis responded quickly, "That's quite enough."

"And it's getting late," Kevin added.

"He's right," Kate said. "We should get the kids home."

There was a chorus of groans from the children.

"We'll have cake in a few days," Alexis promised them.

That didn't make up for having to leave the park before they were ready, but they followed without protest.

"Lanie, thank you for helping pick out my dress," Alexis hugged the other woman.

"It's what family does," Lanie hugged her in response, "I love you, Lex."

"I love you, too," Alexis smiled.

"Have fun tonight," Lanie whispered in Alexis's ear.

Alexis hugged her once more while nodding.

"See you in a few days, Bro," Javier said to Kevin.

"Yeah," Kevin nodded.

"Have fun," Javier grinned.

"I plan on it," Kevin laughed while glancing towards his wife.

"Kevin, we'll have dinner soon, okay?" Bridget hugged her son. "I am so proud of you."

"Thanks Mom, for everything. It's because of your guidance that we're here today."

"Bridget, I want to thank you for raising a good man. I hope I do half the job you did."

"Oh, you will," Bridget smiled as she hugged her daughter-in-law, "Welcome to the family, Alexis."

"Thank you," Alexis smiled. "Good night."

"Good night you two."

Alexis looked around them, "And then there were two."

"Finally," he swept her into his arms and kissed her.

Kevin and Alexis walked back to her apartment with their fingers interlaced. They were all smiles. With each step Alexis felt the laughter coming closer to the surface.

"I'd think you were drunk if you weren't pregnant," Kevin commented as she started to giggle.

"I can't help it," she covered her mouth with her free hand, "I'm so happy. Aren't you?"

"You have no idea," he stopped them to place a kiss on her mouth. "I want to ask you something though."

"Ask me," she said.

"When you were sitting on the picnic table by yourself, what were you doing?"

"Telling Gram she could go now."

"Did she guide us back to each other?" he asked.

"I'd like to think we had a bit of a say in it," Alexis smiled, "But she's always been there to set me on the right path."

"I remember when she died," Kevin looked sad. "You didn't know then that you were pregnant?"

"No," she shook her head. "I found out two days after the funeral. The night I left New York, I asked her to stay with me and Hunter for a while, but I never told her she could go."

"You don't think we'll need her guidance anymore?" he asked.

"I can always ask her to come back if needed," she shrugged, "Hopefully she won't be needed for awhile."

"A very long while," Kevin smiled. "Let's go upstairs."

Alexis looked up at the sky, "Oh my God."

"What is it?" he looked up with her.

"It's gonna rain," she smiled.

"Then we'd better find a good ledge because I know how much my wife loves to make love in the rain."

"Our balcony's free," Alexis wrapped her arms around his neck. "And for the record? Only with you."

"Come, Mrs. Ryan, there's a balcony calling our name," he tugged onto her hand to follow her into the building.

-d-d-d-d-d

Epilogue to follow…


	67. Chapter 50

Okay, so this is it. Kaela and I would like to thank everyone who stuck with us and even all the late comers, especially the most recent, SuperBadKitty37. We hope you like the ending.

-d-d-d-d-d-d-

"Do you, Alexis Ryan, promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?"

"I do," Alexis smiled before she sat down.

Alexis went through the usual questions. Testifying in court used to stress her out, but having done it over a hundred times, she was no longer intimidated by even the hardest of attorneys' questions.

"Objection," the defense stated during a key moment in her testimony. "Sidebar, Your Honor?"

The judge motioned the lawyers forward while Alexis found her dad in the crowd. She smiled at him.

Alexis rubbed at her belly. She'd been feeling a bit peculiar all day. She was due to give birth in a week's time, but insisted she was fit to testify even though Kevin had suggested that she start her maternity leave already.

The lawyers and judge had their heads together discussing some procedural issues, when Alexis's eyes went wide.

"Um, Your Honor?"

"Just a moment, Dr. Ryan," the judge said.

"I don't have a moment, Your Honor," Alexis looked down at the puddle at her feet.

"Yes, Dr. Ryan," the judge looked to her impatiently.

"I think I'm in labor," she responded calmly.

"And why is that, Dr. Ryan?" the judge looked to her again with equal parts annoyance.

"It's just that my water has broken," she replied.

"Oh," the judge said before looking back at the lawyers. Then he did a double take. "Oh!"

"Your Honor, under the circumstances, I request a continuance," the ADA came over to offer a hand to Alexis.

"Granted," the judge replied, "Court is in recess."

Rick was by Alexis's side in five seconds flat, flying over rows of seats and a table to get to her, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I think so," she nodded, "But someone needs to call for an ambulance and someone else should call Kevin."

"Ambulance is on the way," one of the bailiffs announced. "I tried the 12th, but Detective Ryan is at a scene."

"Thanks, Rocky," Alexis smiled at the familiar face.

A contraction kicked in, and Alexis's grip on her father's hands tightened considerably.

"Breath, Sweetheart," Rick encouraged her, trying not to let on how much pain he was in by her tight grip.

"I'm trying," Alexis fumbled for her cell phone and then shoved it at her father, "Dial."

Rick dialed Kevin's number and waited while he and Alexis made their way to the front door to wait for the ambulance.

"Of all days to go into labor," Alexis huffed, "It had to be the day that Kevin suggested I start maternity leave. I'm never going to hear the end of this."

Rick had to smirk at that.

" _Hey, Sweetheart,"_ Kevin's voice came over the line.

"Hello, Darling," Rick responded making Alexis giggle.

" _Castle,"_ Kevin responded in surprise, _"Why are you calling from Alexis's phone?"_

"Because she's having a little trouble breathing right now," Castle explained. "We're on our way to the hospital."

" _Hospital!"_ he exclaimed, _"Is Alexis in...Is she..."_ Kevin began to hyperventilate at the possibility that Alexis had done into labor.

"Yes, she's in labor," Rick said and then he heard clattering. "Kevin? Kevin, where'd you go?"

" _Hey, Babe,"_ Kate's voice said a moment later. _"Kevin's bent over trying to remember how to breathe. Once he does, we'll get him to a hospital."_

"Thank you," Rick replied when the ambulance pulled up and the EMT's hopped out. "Ambulance just rolled up. We'll meet you there."

"Okay. Love you," Kate smiled. "Love to Alexis, too."

Alexis was cursing up a storm as the EMTs loaded her into the ambulance.

-d-d-d-

"You back, Ryan?" Kate hung up his phone while patting his back.

"I…ah…" Kevin's hands were shaking as he righted himself, "I can't drive."

"Don't worry, I can," Kate smiled. "Espo, you good to finish up?"

"Call me when he or she makes their appearance," Esposito smiled.

"Will do," Kate guided Kevin to the waiting vehicle.

"Kate, I'm…" Kevin started.

"I know. You didn't get to do this last time," Kate started the car. "It's okay to freak out."

"I wished I'd paid better attention during Lamaze classes," he began to feel light headed again.

"Just no passing out," Kate advised him. "If you faint, Alexis will knock you cold."

"No promises," Kevin put his head between his knees while Kate navigated the traffic.

Kate bit her lip, not wanting to let on about the bet that she'd made with Javier a week earlier about whether or not Kevin would pass out while Alexis was in labor.

-d-d-d-d-

"Hee-hee-hee-hoo-hoo-hoo," Alexis breathed. "Oh God, how do I forget this every time?"

"It's just like riding a bike," Castle tried to encourage her breathing through another contraction. They were coming quicker and quicker. She was going to have this baby before her husband could arrive if he didn't get there soon.

"I mean the pain," Alexis panted. "When I had Cade, I told Chris if he ever touched me again I was going to rip out his rib cage."

"I'm betting you never had this discussion with Kevin," Rick chuckled.

"Believe me, I'm going to," Alexis growled.

"Lex, I'm here," Kevin appeared in the doorway, panting almost as hard as Alexis. Kate was right behind him.

"Why are you so out of breath?" she scowled at him, "I'm the one in labor."

"He ran up twelve flights of stairs and then back down six to get here," Kate explained. "How are you, Bud?"

"Just peachy," Alexis breathed. "Dad needs his hand X-rayed."

"It can wait," Rick assured her, "Just keep breathing."

Kevin came forward and took Alexis's free hand, "I'm sorry it took so long."

"Yeah, you better be," she replied, crushing his hand as much as she had her father earlier as the pain hit.

"Easy, Sweetheart," Rick stated calmly, "He got here as soon as he could."

Alexis nodded and smiled at her husband.

"Rick," Kate tilted her head.

"You two can handle things from here," Rick told his daughter and son-in-law, "We'll be waiting anxiously in the waiting room."

"Daddy, thank you," Alexis smiled.

"Anytime," he kissed her forehead.

"Castle, I owe you," Kevin smiled at his father-in-law.

"Just take care of my little girl," Rick replied, "We'll call it even."

"You got it," Kevin nodded.

Kate and Rick left the two alone. Kevin looked at Alexis, "I am so sorry I wasn't here."

"You got here when you could," she smiled at him when the contraction subsided, "I'm sorry. I should have listened to you this morning."

"I'll rag on you later for that," Kevin smiled. "Just concentrate on breathing."

"You okay?" she caressed his cheek, "Sounded like you might have dropped the phone when my dad called to tell you I was in labor."

"I panicked a little," Kevin admitted. "Last time this happened…"

"Right," Alexis stopped him from having to go further.

"You okay?" he kissed her forehead.

"Just dandy," she responded sarcastically, "I love squeezing a watermelon out of my body."

"Did Hunter hurt more than Cade or Maggie?"

"He might have, but there was also the overwhelming panic factor. He was my first. I wasn't in a hospital, and I didn't have a doctor," Alexis reminded him.

"Well, we're here now," Kevin replied, "We're doing this together."

"I apologize now for anything I might say or any names I might call you during this process," Alexis smiled.

"It's okay," he chuckled, "I know it will be the pain talking."

"I should probably ap- Oooh!" Alexis twitched in pain.

"Contraction?" he asked on reflex.

She nodded her head and tried to breathe her way through the pain.

"How close are they coming?" he tried to get his bearings on how close they might be.

"Two minutes," Alexis managed to get out. "I'm warning you right now, this isn't going to be pretty, and it's not going to take much longer. Maggie only took a few hours."

"She does seem a bit impatient," he chuckled.

"Hunter took his sweet time," Alexis remembered. "Cade, he waited until Chris got there."

"Take as long as you'd like," Kevin kissed her forehead, "I'm not going anywhere."

"I love you," Alexis smiled, "No matter what I may say in the near future."

-d-d-d-d-

"Hey, any word?" Esposito walked up to where Rick and Kate were sitting in the waiting room.

"Nothing yet," Kate shook her head while checking her watch, "It's only been a couple of hours."

"Lanie will be here when she finishes her report," Esposito said.

"I called home. Jim's entertaining everyone," Rick smiled.

"Thank goodness for my father," Kate sighed, "What would we do without him?"

"I hope we don't have to find out for a long time," Rick said wistfully.

"She's hovering," Kate smiled softly. "She's probably watching her next great-grandchild come into the world."

"I hope so," Rick's head came to rest against Kate's shoulder.

"Her and my mom," Kate assured him. "Speaking of, have you called Meredith?"

"Meredith is in Belize," Castle frowned.

"Figures," Kate rolled her eyes, "God forbid she actually be in the country when one of her grandchildren enters the world."

"Alexis has a pretty good mom right here," Rick smiled as he took Kate's hand.

Kate smiled.

"I'm going to get some coffee," Javi stated, "Think we're going to be here for awhile. Did you two want some?"

"No, thanks," Kate shook her head.

"I'll take food," Rick said. "Anything's good."

"I'll take some of that coffee, if you're offering," Kevin emerged in scrubs while removing his mask.

"Why aren't you with Alexis?" Rick charged at his son-in-law, ready to duke it out if he thoughtlessly left Alexis in the midst of contractions.

"She thought you might like to know that you have a new grandson," Kevin beamed with new fatherly pride. "Seven pounds, eight ounces, and he's perfect."

Kate shrieked and threw her arms around Kevin, "Congratulations!"

"Man, that's great," Javier smiled and waited his turn.

Castle smiled softly. This was a different experience than the first three times. Before it'd been a phone call and promise to visit as soon as he could. Now he could hold his latest grandson in the first hours of his life.

"Alexis, how is she?" Rick asked.

"Amazing," Kevin replied, "Cannot be more in love with her as I am in this moment."

"Where's the newest Ryan?" Kate asked, "We want to meet him."

"Alexis isn't ready to part with him just yet," Kevin explained, "When we're settled back into our room, I'll come get you."

"Kevin, I tried your mom again. Still no answer," Kate said. "Does she have a cell phone?"

"Doesn't everyone in this day and age?" Rick laughed.

"Oh, God. She's in Atlantic City. It's some bus trip through her church. Javi, you have Gwen's number right? Give her the news. She'll have the hotel information for where my mom is staying."

"Yeah, alright," Javi pulled out his phone, "Hey, Ryan, did you name him after me? Javier Ryan has quite the ring to it."

"Well, it's Joseph Javier Ryan."

"I can live with that," Javier laughed, "Calling him JJ for short?"

"We'll see," Kevin smiled.

"I'm gonna call my dad and give him the news," Kate smiled.

"I'm hitting the gift shop," Rick nodded. "Come get us when we can see them."

"Yeah, I will," Kevin nodded as he darted back. He didn't want to be away from either for a moment longer.

"Okay, Javi, pay up," Kate held out her hand.

"I'll give you the twenty for it being a boy, but we don't have conclusive proof that he didn't pass out during the delivery," Javier pulled a twenty out of his pocket and handed it to her.

"He looked pretty fresh to me," Castle laughed and then caught sight of Alexis's doctor at the nurses' station, "Excuse me, Dr. Holmes? Can you settle something for us?"

"Certainly, Mr. Castle, what can I do for you?" the doctor asked. "Congratulations by the way."

"Thank you," Rick smiled. "Uh, my son-in-law, did he stay standing through the entire delivery?"

"It was touch and go a few times," the doctor chuckled, "I've seen a lot worse. At least he didn't pass out. I can't tell you how many times I've watched that happen."

Kate held out her hand while Javier cursed under his breath.

"Thank you," Rick smiled.

"What did I miss?" Lanie came in just as Kate pocketed her money.

"Javier lost forty bucks, and I have a new grandson," Rick smiled.

"Congratulations, Gramps," Lanie hugged Castle, "How's Alexis?"

"Kevin says she's great. We're letting them get settled."

"Sounds like it got a little dramatic in the court room," Lanie laughed.

"She went into labor on the stand and had to interrupt a sidebar."

"Why is that the first we're hearing of that?" Kate smacked her husband's shoulder in scolding.

"I had a few things on my mind," Rick defended himself.

"I suppose you do have a valid excuse on that one," Kate conceded.

"Thank you," Rick nodded.

"Excuse me, Mr. Castle? Detective Ryan sent me out to tell you that they're ready for visitors."

Kate took Rick's hand and eagerly followed the nurse towards Alexis's room.

Rick poked his head in, "Okay to come in?"

"Yeah," Alexis smiled brightly while holding her newest child close.

Kate hurried to Alexis's side and peered at the little bundle, "Oh my God. Look at him."

"He's handsome just like his grandpappy," Castle chuckled.

"Like hell, he looks like his daddy," Kate smiled. "Hi, Joseph."

"Are we sure about that?" Rick glanced at his grandson a second time, "That looks like a Castle nose."

"But those are Kevin's eyes," Alexis said. "Just like Hunter."

"And Kevin's Dumbo ears," Rick teased.

"Bite your tongue, Dad," Alexis snarled at her father, "His ears are perfect."

"Thank you," Kevin smiled. "Where's Javi?"

"He and Lanie are in the waiting room."

"I'm sure they'll be along shortly."

"I hope so," Alexis smiled. "Joseph needs to meet his godfather."

"And who is his godmother?" Kate asked.

"You, if you want the job," Alexis smiled.

"Me, really?" Kate smiled widely.

"Yes," Kevin nodded.

"Wow, I'm honored," Kate brushed a tear away.

"Can I hold him?" Rick asked his daughter, while motioning towards his newest grandson.

"Sure, Dad," Alexis nodded and Rick came closer to cradle the small bundle.

Kevin sat down next Alexis on the bed and put his arm around her.

Little Joseph didn't seem to appreciate his grandfather's arms and started crying.

"Hand him over, Castle," Kate took the little boy.

Rick frowned when the infant instantly calmed down in his wife's arms.

"He'll warm up to you, Dad," Alexis laughed.

"Maggie loved me at first sight," Rick said grumpily.

"She was a few weeks old when you first met," Alexis reminded him, "I'm sure in a few weeks time, Joseph will love you just as much."

"Thank you," Rick frowned.

"I hear there's a new member of the family in here," Lanie poked her head in.

"He wanted to make sure it was dramatic," Alexis laughed, "Dad, I swear if this ends up as a plot point in one of your novels, I'm going to strangle you."

"Would I do that?" Rick asked.

"Yes," everyone said.

"Look at the handsome little man," Lanie took in Little Joseph's appearance, "Looks like a Ryan alright."

"Poor kid," Javier smirked.

"You need a kid or two," Kevin commented.

"You're looking to be put out of commission permanently," Javi glared at his partner.

Alexis tried to hide a yawn, but Kate saw it, "I think we need to leave the family alone."

"Let me try one more time," Rick motioned for Kate to hand his grandson over.

"You sure?" Kate eyed her husband.

"Yes," Rick stated, "Come to Papa, Little Joey."

Kevin smiled at his son and father-in-law, remembering little Benny from all those years ago.

Joseph was much more receptive to Rick's embrace the second time around.

Alexis leaned her head on Kevin's shoulder and laced their fingers together.

He kissed her forehead and whispered his love in her ear.

She smiled and lifted her other hand to gently trace his thumb and forefinger.

Lanie watched the scene with a smile and then suddenly felt like she was spying, "We should be going. It's getting late."

"Yeah, we should head out," Javi picked up on his girlfriend's hint. "Congrats, Alexis, Ryan. We'll stop back tomorrow."

"Night guys. I promise you'll get a shot at holding your godson tomorrow, Javi," Alexis smiled.

"We're counting on it," Javi winked at her.

"We should go, too," Kate smiled. "My dad's probably ready to climb out on the ledge by now."

"Yeah," Rick reluctantly agreed while handing off his grandson to his son-in-law, "Call if you need anything. We'll bring your quartet over tomorrow to meet their brother."

"Cade had the sniffles this morning, can you-"

"I'll make sure he takes cold medicine," Kate nodded as she hugged Alexis. "Congratulations, Sweetie."

Finally alone, just the three of them, Alexis released a sigh.

Kevin looked up from Joseph, "What's that for?"

"I was just thinking how good it was to be doing this in New York," Alexis smiled, "New Orleans was a great place to live, but New York in home. It's good that we found our way back to it, back to each other."

Kevin leaned over and kissed her, "Welcome home, Lex."


	68. Bonus

My co-writer Andrea wrote this at the same time she wrote Chris's letter to Alexis. Unfortunately we never found a place for it. But I decided it was too good not to share with you all. I hope you enjoy it.

=d=d=d=d=d=d=

Detective Kevin Ryan,

You don't know me. My name is Chris LaSalle. I'm an NCIS agent based in New Orleans. That makes me a Fed, but don't hold that against me. I walked in your shoes for a bit too. I'm also Alexis Castle's husband.

Alexis and I got married about four years ago, and we're very happy together. We were blessed with a son about two years ago and named him Cade. Tonight she's blessed me with a daughter. Her name is Maggie, and much like the night our younger son was born, it got me to thinking about Hunter's father. That's you by the way, if you didn't already know. I'll leave Alexis to give you all the details.

If my thoughts feel disjointed, you'll have to forgive me. Maggie's a bit colicky and keeps us up at night, but the exhaustion is worth it.

You'll probably want to punch me for saying this, but you're a punk ass for letting her go. Allie told me the circumstances surrounding your separation, but you're still a punk ass. If it was me, I would have followed her to the ends of the earth.

Not gonna lie. I've resented you from the moment Alexis first told me about you. I resented you for always being a part of my relationship with Alexis. Alexis told me that Hunter looks like you, and that not a day goes by that she doesn't think about you when she looks at her son. How does a man compete with that?

My purpose for this letter is simple. If you're reading this, I've died, which means you get another chance with Alexis. Don't be a punk ass any longer. Do whatever it is you need to do to be with her. Get yourself free if you have to and fight for her. Fight for her and never let her go. Take it from me, she's so worth it.

I ask a few things of you. If you're lucky enough to have Alexis give you another chance, I need for you to treat my children just as I have treated yours, like one of your own. Hunter is the best little boy a father could ask for. I hope you're able to know him and see it for yourself. Be patient with Alexis. We both know how stubborn she is. It's going to take time for her to let you back in.

Treat her right, Detective.

Chris LaSalle


End file.
